Me: Hello, one and all, to the third annual...um, no wait. Third Reviewers Special! HURRAY! Ok, enough of that. Let's see...who is on the invite list...
Naruto: Hello!
Me: Um...I don't see your name here anywhere, Naruto.
Naruto: But...but...I'm the main character! I have to be here!
Me: No...you don't. But since you're here anyways, I suppose you can stay. Let's just hope that she doesn't get here.
Naruto: Who?
Me: You know...(looks around nervously before whispering) Sakura...
Sakura: I heard my name!
Me: NOOOOOOOO!!! It's the curse of the useless pink haired girl! NOOOOOO!!!!
Sakura: Shut up! I'm tired of all this useless stuff!
Me: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
Naruto: I'm glad you're here, Sakura-chan...
Sakura: You're still never going to see me naked, Naruto.
Naruto: Darn...
Me: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Sakura: So, when is Sasuke-kun getting here?
Me: He was to busy cutting his wrists and telling himself over and over again that life wasn't worth living to come, especially living with YOU!
Sakura: He's...he's cutting his wrists? NOOO! My Sasuke-kun! (Runs away)
Me: VICTORY IS MINE!
Naruto: Why'd you say that?
Me: To get rid of her. Hmmm...now, invite list says...Itachi, Deidara, Sasori...wait, Konan is coming?...YES! AWESOME!
Naruto: Konan?
Me: The chick from Akatsuki. She's, like, totally hot!
Naruto: Really? Hotter than Sakura?
Me: (If I could do an anime sweat drop, it would be here) Yes...much hotter. In fact, I think that Tenten is hotter than Sakura is.
Naruto: No way!
Me: Fine, be an underachiever for the rest of your days. Whatever, suits me. Now, let's see. Who else...Neji should be here. Kiba is done with the rabies thing, so he should be here to. Um...Hinata, Ino, and Lee should also be here...but, I thought Lee was doing a Glaceau Vitamin Water commercial...That's right! Glaceau Vitamin Water, the only water used by Lee and Uzuki-kun. Rich taste and smooth flavor, packed with vitamins and minerals for that quick start. Glaceau Vitamin Water...TRY IT!
Naruto: Um...what are you doing?
Me: No, nothin'. Ok, that should be everyone. Just wait for everyone to show up now.
Sasori: I'm here. Let's get this started.
Me: Hey Sasori! Um...where's Deidara and Itachi...and (drooling) Konan.
Sasori: I do not know. Deidara is always late. Itachi never arrives early, and Konan...is, well...
Me: What?
Sasori: She's on that time again...
Me: What? No! Say it isn't so!
Sasori: Yes...she's...on the paper!
Me: NOOOOOOO!!!!!!
Sasori: Shut up! God, I'm tired of you already!
Naruto: Where are the others?
Itachi: Sorry I am late. Kisame wanted to come, but I told him he wasn't invited.
Me: Well, since Konan isn't coming (sniff) he could've come.
Itachi: Hehehe...his loss.
Kiba: Ok, I'm here! Right Akamaru!
Akamaru: I suppose so! However, the context of defining here simply states that you have walked into the room, not that you are actually here in mind and body.
Kiba: Akamaru! We talked about this, remember?
Akamaru: Oh, dear me. I apologize. I mean...Woof!
Kiba: That's better. So, who else is showing up?
Hinata: Hello!
Kiba: Hey Hinata...
Me: Well, at least something is going right today...hehehe...
Naruto: Where's Neji?
Hinata: Neji...had something else to do.
Naruto: Like what, comb his hair again?
Hinata:...Yes.
Naruto: HAHAHAHAHAHAA!
Me: Well, his hair is quite gorgeous.
Naruto: No way! Mine is way better than his!
Me: (Tries not to laugh too hard) Well, I guess this is it, huh?
Ino: I'm here! Am I late?
Me: No, not late at all, Ino.
Ino: Good!
Tenten: I'm here to!
Me: Well, you weren't really invited, Tenten...
Tenten: What? Really?
Me: Yes. But, since Neji isn't coming, you can be his stand-in.
Tenten: Oh, Neji isn't coming? Well, I suppose I'll stay.
Me: Sure! Well, this is about it. So, let's start reading some fanfiction lovers mail, huh? First one goes to...um...Naruto...so he'll shut up for the remainder of this!
Naruto: Not very nice...but ok! First one is from jjayno1, and they say, " Lol that was soo funny you should definitely do a Jiraiya story. Oh, and does Sasuke really die in the manga by Deidara, coz the one I just read he was imploding, so, yeh..."
Me: No...unfortunately not. But, Deidara should be here, though. Just because he isn't in the manga anymore doesn't mean he doesn't have any rights to his toys, video games, or plushies! (Hugs his Deidara plushie closer)
Deidara: Did someone say plushie, un?
Me: Good, you're here. Well, since you just got here, why not read the next fan letter, Deidara?
Deidara: Ok, then! The next review is from Sasuke's Banshee...wow, they sure do review a lot, un!
Me: I know. Go on.
Deidara: Anyways, they say, "Heeheehee...I like weasels, they're fluffy!"
Me: Yes...yes they are. Mine is crazy to. He goes all phycho insane and blasts people with his weasel feet and carves them up like Christmas geese, and...
Hinata: Calm down, Uzuki-kun. Please...
Me: Erg...fine, whatever. Thanks for the review, Sasuke's Banshee. Next, why not read one Hinata?
Hinata: Sure. The next one is from CraZyBlueMonKey, who says, "What? I'm a girl, not a boy! (starts whining and complaining)."
Me: Oops...er...hahaha...right you are then, Monkey! You're a girl...erm...yeah. Sorry about the mix-up. Your name doesn't imply gender, just that you are a psycho, discolored simian...that's all. Er...hehehe...Itachi, take the next one, willya?
Itachi: Hmm...the next one is from KabutoLuvr, who says, "Great job Uzuki-kun, this is downright brilliant. Every time I read it I can't stop giggling. And shout out to Deidara, I love him! glances at username Although not as much as some... Speaking of which, will you ever bring Orochimaru and Kabuto into the story? We all know about their personal fan-fiction hell in real life... But anyway, update often, this thing is just too awesome."
Me: Yes...yes it is. Updating has become hard on this story, because of two reasons. One, I haven't really thought of anything new and interesting for it, and two, I have so many other stories, it has kinda gotten pushed to the side. It really sucks thinking of new ideas, and then not being able to un-think them, you know?
Itachi: I will kill Orochimaru and Kabuto. They will die!
Me: No...no you won't. Orochimaru...well, he's...not a problem. Kabuto...he's...well, I'd better not say. Um, Ino...no wait, Tenten...no...Hey! Both of you!
Ino and Tenten: What?
Me: Read the next one!
Ino: Ok, I'll start off. The next one is from darkmoonphase, who says, "Deidara...Tobi fixed it so Deidara exploded in the end, didn't he? I like Tobi...um...right. Good job! (Nice story, Deidara!).
Tenten: You exploded? That sounds neat!
Deidara: Wait...I exploded? WHAT! I never typed that, un! Errrr...TOBI!!!!!!! (Runs off to check his account and kill Tobi!)
Me: WAIT! DEIDARA! DON'T LEAVE! WE'RE NOT THROUGH YET!!!!!
Sasori: He's gone...this is boring, you are pissing me off!
Me: Then, why not read one, Sasori?
Sasori: Fine, I will. The next review comes from White Haired Teen, who says, " Ha ha! This is good! I love the story battle with Itachi and Sasuke! And Deidara's story was awesome! But when does Lee get to write a story?"
Me: What? Lee, write a story? Do you know how long it took me to get my computer running after the last time Lee tried to write a story? Huh?
Itachi: Hehehe...foolish little brother. He never did get good grades in Writing 101. Hehehe...
Me: But...he has you being gay with Orochimaru...doesn't that perturb you at all?
Itachi: Not one bit. I know it isn't true, as do my fan girls...(Turns and smiles at the camera, trying his best to look as sexy as possible). Besides, Sasuke has something in store that will probably destroy him forever...hehehe...
Me: Any chance of a hint at what that is? (Takes out a pad of paper and a pencil to get ideas)
Itachi: No...but I will let you know soon enough.
Me: Darn! Ok, well...um, Kiba! Take the next one, will you?
Kiba: Alright! Let's see, the next review is from sincerely – your stalker. They say, " Ah, this story always makes me laugh. Naruto seems like the type that can't use a computer or spell for his life. oh yeah, and aww! i think it's cute that you have a crush on hina-chan. rock on!"
Me:...
Hinata: Ummm...
Me:...
Hinata: Uzuki-kun?
Me:...
Naruto: WHAT! I can so type and spell. See what you did, you bastard? Now, people hate me! God!
Me:...
Hinata: (Not saying a thing)
Me: ALRIGHT! Moving right along now...um, I guess I'll read the next one, which is from Kokoro Kiyoshi. They say, "I read the first chapter and I already love it!" I know, it sucks you right in, doesn't it? You can't escape the iron grip of the funny! Give in! GIVE IN!!! MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Hinata: (Still not saying a thing)
Itachi: I am bored now. I will leave, since I have...plans...
Me: With Orochimaru? Hehehehehe...
Itachi: Err...
Me: Ummm...wait...what? (Stares into space for a second...then falls to the floor...)
Hinata: Um...Uzuki-kun?
Itachi: When he wakes up, tell him that he's next. Oh, and also tell him that I never really cut out his liver...(leaves)
Hinata: Um...So, now what?
Naruto: I will be the master of ceremonies now, since Uzuki is knocked out like a clown! Ok, the next one will be read by...um...me! HAHAHA! Jjayno1 says, "The whole begging bit with Kakashi, Tsunade, and Sasuke was soo funny! Update soon!"
Sasori: Humph...like all of us would ever be beaten by an upstart in an orange jumpsuit.
Naruto: HEY! It's not a jumpsuit! Geez.
Sasori: No fashion sense and a personality to match.
Naruto: I'm going to beat the living hell out of you!
Sasori: Not likely. Well, since no one else is here, I might as well...
Konan: Sorry I'm late, everyone. Traffic was murder!
Sasori: ...I hate you...
Konan: Nice to see you to, Master Sasori. Hmm...who's the guy on the floor?
Naruto: Uzuki...He has a crush on you, you know?
Konan: Really? Hmmm...he's handsome. Oh well, whatever. So, am I to late to read anything?
Naruto: Naw, go ahead. I'm bored now anyways.
Konan: Um...ok. The next one is from suzsan, and she says, "This is great!" Is it? I haven't been reading.
Naruto: Yes, yes it is! You should read it!
Konan: Maybe I will. Well, I have to go now. I have things to do, places to go...people to cut! Bye! (Leans down and kisses Uzuki-kun on the floor) Tell him when he wakes up to call me, ne? (Leaves)
Sasori: How pathetic...(Leaves as well)
Naruto: Hey! Everyone's leaving!
Ino: Yea, I have to go now, to. Shikamaru wants to do something. Chouji should be there to. See you all later! (Leaves)
Naruto: What? Guys, come on!
Tenten: Yea, I should leave to. After all, Neji will need help with his perm...teeheehee...(leaves)
Naruto: GUYS!!!!
Kiba: Don't worry, Naruto! I'm still here!
Naruto: Yeah, that's great, Kiba. Come on you guys! Come back!
Kiba: (sigh) I'll read the next one. It's from Sasuke's Banshee...man, they review a lot! Geez! Anyways, they say... "Naruto is so gonna get his ass kicked. . .and i'll join the killing naruto! Lol. Well, anyway...good chappie. (shakes head Naruto is so full of himself."
Naruto: What? I'm not full of myself! I'm full of squishy goodness!
Kiba: Shut up! Damn, you talk loud!
Akamaru: Yes, he does, doesn't he? He kinda reminds me of my sisters and brothers, but...
Kiba: Akamaru!
Akamaru: Oops...sorry! I mean...Woof! Arf arf! Errrr...woof!
Kiba: Keep it that way.
Me: Err...arg...what happened? Uh...AHHHH!!! MY LIVER!
Kiba: Don't worry, Itachi said he didn't actually remove it.
Me: God...I hate that guy now! I'll get him back for sending me to the realm of Tsukiyomi. Just you wait and see...I'll get him!
Naruto: Well, while you rant, I'll say the next one. It's from White Haired Teen, and they say, "Lol! I love Sasuke's title for the story! It's so original XD! Naruto's story was so dumb, but in a good way. "
Me: Hehehe...
Naruto: See! If you hadn't rewritten it, it would have been perfectly fine!
Me: What? Me? If I hadn't rewritten it, it would've been to hard to read and people wouldn't have read it at all!
Naruto: Whatever!
Hinata: Umm...you guys...I'm still here...
Me: Oh...Hinata...um...yeah...why don't you read the next one, ne?
Hinata: Oh...sure. The next review is from 4everfangirl, who says, "Itachi is not ugly! He's sexy! But other than that is frekin hilarious!" (Just then, Itachi runs in, doing his sexy pose really fast, then runs back out.)
Me: Um...what the hell was that?
Naruto: I don't know...
Hinata: It must have been...the SEXY FLASH!
Me: No...he doesn't exist...(looks at the audience) or...does he? (dun dun dunnnnnnnnn)
Naruto: Ok! Enough of that crap. I will read the last one. It is from Last Alchemist Standing, who says, "Yayness! You have returned! This was a pretty good chapter, but it wasn't your best. (It was kinda confusing with the whole Akatsuki thing) I liked the part at the end with the milk carton thing. Now please hurry with the next chapter because your awesomely awesome! Good job...and a smiley face thingy...and the initials L.A.S."
Me: I know I'm awesome! Yes, I am...
Naruto: Hey! My chapter was by far the best...
Me: No it wasn't!
Naruto: Yes it was...
Me: Whatever you say, Naruto...whatever you say...
Kiba: Oh! I just remembered, that Konan girl was here. She said for you to call her, Uzuki.
Me: What? She was here? What did she say? Really?
Naruto: Yeah...she said something about you calling her, and that it was important or something. Then...she kissed you! OOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
Me: She...she did? I was asleep for it? Why the hell didn't anyone wake me up?
Hinata: We thought that...um, you could use the rest.
Me: NO!!! My one chance!
Naruto: She left a number for you...
Me: Really? Well, where is it?
Naruto: Umm...(Holds it up) Right here! LATER!!!! (Runs away)
Me: NARUTO! GET BACK HERE WITH THAT NUMBER!!!!
Naruto: No way! It's mine now! HAHAHAHAHAHAH!
Me: ERRRRRRR...NNNNNNAAARRRRRUUUUUUTTTTOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! (Both are now gone...)
Hinata: Ohh...it looks like only me and you are left, Kiba...
Kiba: Yea...I suppose so. Well, stay tuned for more, everyone! Say goodbye, Akamaru!
Akamaru: Goodbye!
Kiba: Akamaru!
Akamaru: Oh...I mean...ARF!
Kiba: That's better!
Hinata: Goodbye, everyone!