"He what?" Gibbs said in disbelief.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you before, but he begged me not to and-"
"Abby, that's not something that you hide for a friend."
"That's why I stayed with him, Gibbs. I wanted to make sure he was okay. I told him I'd be watching him like a hawk, and I did… he never acted suicidal. I figured he just felt helpless while he was trapped."
Gibbs put his hand on his forehead, "Abby, I can't- I can't talk about this right now. I'm going in to see McGee."
"Gibbs!" Abby called out as he walked away. He ignored her, found a nurse, and made his way to Tim.
One by one they all visited Tim. Gibbs stood over him, inwardly telling him off. Ducky told him a story that he somehow felt related to the situation. Abby wrapped her hand in his and cried silently. Ziva stood back, only going up to him when she was about to leave, and kissed him on the cheek.
Since Tony had taken the one car, only Gibbs' was left. Once Ziva came out, Gibbs gave her the keys and told her to drive back to NCIS… He was going to stay.
Gibbs walked back into Tim's room and sat down in the uncomfortable chair. He stared at his pale, sickly agent. There was dark circles under his eyes, and a small bruise on his forehead from when he fell. He had a nasal cannula giving him oxygen, and an IV in his arm to hydrate him. Gibbs looked at Tim's hands, which were still red… Just another reminder of the forty-eight hours of horror that Tim had previously gone through. Gibbs remembered that the doctor said that, besides the dissolved pills and some water, Tim's stomach was empty… which meant he also hadn't been eating. There were so many things wrong with Tim, inside and out, and Gibbs felt helpless. He stood back and watched while his agent withered away, and he did nothing. He thought that if he just gave him some space, then maybe Tim would be okay, but he was wrong... No matter how many things were happening at that moment, the one thing that Gibbs didn't understand at all was why the psychiatrist at NCIS ever let Tim resume duties… But, that was a conversation for another time. Right now all that mattered, was Tim.
Gibbs stayed for the rest of the day… and night. This wing of the hospital had a much stricter rule about visitors leaving once visiting hours were over, but Gibbs didn't care. The only way he was leaving was if they carried his dead body out… It took two different guards coming in to make everyone realize that… and Gibbs was pretty sure he made one of the guards cry.
He stayed awake until after midnight, then he slowly drifted off to sleep. His neck laid back against the top of the chair, his feet on the ground. It was one of the most uncomfortable positions ever, in one of the most uncomfortable chairs ever, but he had had to sleep in worse conditions before.
He opened his eyes. Everything was blurry at first. He blinked a few times to adjust his vision. The only light entering the room was coming from the window. He looked around. Nothing was familiar. He started to panic, but then he saw a familiar face sitting beside him, asleep. 'Hospital,' Tim realized when his mind cleared. '…But why?' Apparently his mind wasn't completely clear.
He didn't want to wake up Gibbs, but he wanted to know what was going on… Gibbs must have read his mind in his sleep, because just as Tim went to open his mouth, Gibbs made a groaning noise and his eyes opened. He scrunched up his face and put a hand on the back of his neck, obviously regretting the way he had slept.
Once he finished stretching his neck a little, he looked at Tim, "You're awake."
Tim nodded, "I am."
"How long have you been up?"
"Like twenty seconds… give or take ten. How long have I been asleep?"
Gibbs looked at his watch, "About twenty hours."
Tim looked around the room, then back at Gibbs, "What am I doing here?"
"You don't remember?"
"No."
"You overdosed on Tylenol."
Suddenly Tim remembered. He put a hand to his head, "Oh my God."
Gibbs stood up. He wasn't going to beat around the bush, "Tim, why didn't you talk to someone? You could have talked to me, or Tony, Ducky, Ziva, Abby… anyone!"
"What are you talking about?"
"You should have come to us instead of going and trying to kill yourself, again, by taking pills."
Tim's eyes widened, "I- I didn't try to kill myself," He replied, confused.
"McGee, DiNozzo and Ziva found you lying on your bedroom floor. You were barely breathing. You went into defib on the way to the hospital and had to be shocked twice. When your stomach was pumped they found the amount of ten pills-"
"I'm not saying I didn't take the pills," Tim interrupted. He began talking quickly, "I did take them, but I wasn't trying to kill myself… Why would anyone kill themselves with Tylenol? You wouldn't even die right away! You would most likely get liver damage and that would slowly kill you! That would be a horrible way to kill myself!"
"Tim! Slow down… If you weren't trying to kill yourself, then what were you trying to do?"
"I just- I wanted to sleep. Every time I would fall asleep, I would have nightmares. I wanted to close my eyes without having the nightmares." Tim rubbed his eyes. He could feel the tears forming, and he did not want to cry in front of his boss.
Gibbs sat back down, "Why did you take ten pills, McGee?"
Tim sighed, "I wasn't thinking straight. I had been up all night, hacking into the FBI, then going over the case file. Then I came into work and… I just got so angry."
"Yeah, I know."
Tim looked mortified, "Boss, I am so sorry. I didn't mean everything I said-"
"Don't apologize. Keep going with the story."
Tim took a deep breath, "Once I left the bullpen I went down to autopsy cause I knew Ducky kept pills down there. I found the Tylenol and I took them home. I took two at first, but it just wouldn't work fast enough… So, I took two more. Then, a few minutes later, I took the rest. I swear, I just wanted to get some sleep."
"I believe you, McGee."
Tim rested his head back on his pillow. They were both silent for a moment, then Tim looked back at Gibbs, "Wait. You said 'again'."
"What?"
"You said 'You should have come to us instead of going and trying to kill yourself, again'." Gibbs just looked at him. Again, Tim looked mortified, "…Abby."
"She was scared. She didn't want to tell me… although she should have, a long time ago."
"No, she shouldn't have."
"You're right… You should have told. Did you skip over that during your psych evaluation?"
"Boss, I was terrified. I didn't think there was any other way out. Before that moment I had never thought of committing suicide, and I never thought about it afterwards."
"You still should have told," Gibbs replied, "I don't like my team keeping secrets."
"What was I supposed to say?"
"Anything. We're all here for you, Tim. The whole team would have been willing to do anything to help you out. Do you not realize that?"
"I just… I didn't want everyone to think I was weak."
Gibbs stood up, walked over to Tim, and smacked the back of his head to make sure he had his full attention. He leaned in closer to Tim, pointed at him, and stared straight in his eyes, "I don't put weak people on my team. I didn't think you were weak eight years ago when you couldn't even form full sentences, and I definitely don't think you're weak now. Do you understand me?"
Tim nodded, "Yes, Boss."
"And you'll let us help you. You'll talk to us instead of trying to deal with everything on your own." It came out as a statement, but he wanted Tim's answer.
Tim took a deep breath before replying, "Yes, Boss."
This was not the way this chapter was going to end. I cut it slightly short because I didn't want to take any of the focus off of the Tim/Gibbs talk. I hope you guys liked it :) Let me know what you think!
Also, new NCIS tonight! WOOOOOOOOOOT! *Clears throat* ...I'm cool and calm, no worries.