He squeezes the slime in his hand for stress relief as he clicks on message button of the dating site. He was annoyed when his sister had set him up an account on Plenty of Fish, but he gets it; their mother worries that he's lonely. His mother doesn't understand he's happy being single.

Just because she doesn't believe him doesn't mean he can't have some fun. He only logs into the account when he needs a good laugh.

Like today. He found a hive full of bees dead, and he could definitely use some cheering up. There's four messages in his inbox, three of them from people he's talked to before. The fourth is a new person—DrakeTheGreat.

He snorts at the name. It's one of the least imaginative names. The message is much better.

"Are you a Pokemon? Because you're on fire."

He laughs at that. It's much better than the messages who are asking about the rubber duck he's leaning against in his profile picture. (His sister laughed until she cried when he changed it.) He enjoys that this person went for a message about his username instead; his sister had chosen Charmander for his username, which he found both brilliant and hilarious.

He quickly types back, "Is that the best you've got?"

The reply is almost instantaneous. "You think you can do better?"

That's really all it takes because he never steps down from a challenge. "Do you want to ride on my magic carpet? Because I can show you a whole new world."

While he waits for the response, he glances through DrakeTheGreat's profile. There's a picture of a gorgeous blond. Which means there's a high chance that the man in the picture isn't who he's talking to, but that doesn't matter. At least he can have a bit of fun.

"Are you a star? Because you are out of this world."

This has to be one of the best conversations he's had with a person on this site. He grins as he types, "Are you a wizard? Because I think you cast a spell on me."

"Are you a genie lamp? Because I'd like to rub you til stuff comes out."

He laughs brightly at that. "Subtly is not your strong point, is it?"

"We're on a dating site. Was I supposed to be subtle?"

"No, I suppose not. Maybe I can be convinced to show you later why everyone is so pleased with me in the sheets."

"Now, who's lacking subtlety? Besides, you just sound over confident with your skills."

The redhead laughs. "Do you really think that I would falsify my work? Shame, I conducted a very thorough experiment too."

"Well, I suppose you'll just have to show me then. After all, seeing is believing."

"I'm sure that I can sway you."

The next step is clearly to meet in person, so he offers a coffeehouse a few streets over. He's not looking forward to telling his sister he found someone.

Meet cute: online dating site

Character appreciation: (object) rubber duck

Days: Singles Awareness Day - Write about someone who is happily single

Tv: Dr. Jack Hodgins: (AU) entomologist, (dialogue) "Do you really think that I would falsify my work?", (item) slime

Serpents: Hook nosed sea snake- (dialogue) "Subtlety is not your strong point, is it?"

Lent: No mention of character names.

Fairytale: Aladdin - Creature: Genie, Item: Magic Carpet, Word: Street

Insane: 938. Restriction - No character names

365: 30. AU - Online Dating!AU

Writing month wc: 501