A/N: All things Twilight belong to Stephenie Meyer, I prefer them human.
This originally was supposed to be two chapters, but I was told I would be hunted down and hurt. So you get a chapter that is a little longer than my others.
My heartfelt thanks to Morgan, Scarlette71177, theswandive, and onlybythenight1 for beta'ing and making this so much better. I am nothing without you guys.
Love Comes Last
This Can't Be Happening
Chapter 19
EPOV
I trot down the stairs and freeze half way down. I lean against the stair rail, and cover my mouth to stop the laughter that is trying to escape as I stare at the scene before me. Standing in front of the French doors leading to our patio is my beautiful wife, wearing a floppy, yellow rain hat, knee-high rubber boots, and my raincoat that is four sizes too large for her, even with her pregnant belly. She is soaked to the skin and she doesn't look happy.
I cross my arms over my chest. "Bella, what are you doing?" Her head flies up, and she glares at me.
"Your stupid dogs won't go out in the rain by themselves, and they had to go to the bathroom. I thought they were supposed to be water dogs," she states emphatically, as she tosses her hat onto the patio, while my happy, wet dogs run to me.
"Whoa! Slow down boys," I yell at my large dogs. It's hard to believe that only seven short months ago they were small enough to hold in one hand.
I walk into the utility room and grab a towel that we use to dry off our "children." I dry off the dogs, snickering under my breath as I watch Bella dry herself off. She removes my coat and hangs it up on the back of the door, she pulls her boots off and slips on her fuzzy slippers. She is still wearing her nightgown and is still the most beautiful woman in the world to me, even soaking wet.
I wrap my arms around her and pull her to my chest. I lean down and kiss her gently.
"Good morning. Why didn't you wake me up if they wouldn't go out? You shouldn't be running around in the rain with two large dogs in your condition."
"I'm pregnant, Edward, not crippled. I don't understand why they will go out in the rain if someone is with them, and race around getting soaked, but won't go out on their own. It makes no sense."
"I think they figure that if you aren't afraid of the water falling on your head, they'll be okay," I tell her as I fill the dogs' food bowls.
Bella, still grumbling, goes to the kitchen to make coffee and breakfast. Even though I have told her over and over again that she doesn't need to get up early with me, she does, every morning.
Killer walks into the kitchen and lays his head in Bella's lap. He looks up at her with his sweet, puppy dog eyes, and it takes everything in me not to laugh out loud.
"Oh, now you want to be sweet and loving, huh?" Bella asks him. "Or are you just begging for some bacon?" She rubs his head as she feeds him her bacon.
"You spoil them rotten," I tell her, shaking my head.
"I'm sorry, but how do you resist those eyes?" She gets up and places the rest of her bacon in each of the dogs' bowls. I take my plate to the kitchen, still shaking my head.
"What time is your doctor's appointment?" I ask, while refilling our coffee cups.
"Eleven."
"I wish I could be there. I hate missing your appointments, but I couldn't change this meeting."
"Edward, all she is going to do is weigh me, measure my belly, and tell me to come back in a couple of weeks. I know how important this meeting is for the clinics. Don't worry about me so much." Bella starts to clear the table.
"I know, but the weather is supposed to turn bad this afternoon, and I don't like you being on the road."
I'm already freaking out
"You are worse than an old woman." Bella laughs. "I'll be fine, and the baby will be fine. Now, go charm these moneybags you're meeting with into giving you lots of money."
Early on we had decided against finding out the sex of our child. We want to be surprised in the delivery room. We agreed that any further children we may have, we would find out ahead of time, but not with our first.
As I gather my things and make my way to the garage, I stop in the kitchen and spin Bella around to kiss her.
"Promise me you'll call when you get home from your appointment."
"I will, now will you please go to work?" Bella smirks at me, but pulls me down for one more kiss.
I hated these types of meetings, hours spent trying to convince people with lots of money that Free Clinics were worth their investment. But, they're necessary. Today I'm meeting with four of the richest men in Seattle. Two of them are physicians so they're an easy sell. We show them the data proving what we've accomplished and their checkbooks magically open. However, the other two are business men, who like to see the bottom line. I've scheduled them for the afternoon, since it will take a little more arm-twisting.
I glance at my watch while waiting for my next appointment to show up. I notice it's after two in the afternoon. I pull my phone from my pocket. No missed calls. I call Bella's cell, but it goes straight to voice mail. I call the house, but get the machine.
I walk out to the reception area. "Gianna? Has my wife called?"
"No, Dr. Cullen, haven't heard from her."
I chew the inside of my lip. "She had a doctor's appointment this morning, and she was supposed to call me when she got home."
"Dr. Cullen, really? Appointments never happen on time, and besides there may have been an unscheduled delivery that pushed everything back. I'm sure she's fine."
Gianna's right. Anything could have happened. "Yeah, you're right. But, if she should call, be sure to interrupt, no matter what."
"Will do Dr. C." Gianna smiles at me.
I'm deep in the middle of explaining the finer points of how Free Clinics work when Gianna knocks on the door and peeks in.
"I'm sorry, Dr. Cullen, but Dr. Richard Kirby from Harborview is on line two. He says it's urgent."
I frown. I've known Richard Kirby for years. Carlisle hired him about ten years ago. He is one of the finest trauma surgeons in the world, but I haven't spoken to him for years, other than a quick hello at the Cullen family galas.
I pick up the phone. "Hi, Rich. What's up?"
His tone is ominous. "Edward, there's been an accident."
XXXXXXXXX
I race up the steps to the Trauma Center at Harborview Hospital. I barely remember driving here. All I have running through my head is: a logging truck ran a light, serious injuries, being flown from the site. I remember yelling at Gianna to call my family.
I reach the floor and run to the intake center. I see Rich across from the nurses' station and start toward him as he glances up and makes his way to me.
"Rich, how is she?" I ask anxiously, breathless from running.
"She's being prepped for surgery. Her right leg is shattered, and there's internal bleeding. We need to operate now."
"Can I see her, please? I need to see her." I practically beg.
"Edward, she's already being prepped, time is of the essence. We've been waiting for you to sign the consent. She hasn't regained consciousness, but there doesn't seem to be any head injuries according to the MRI. Our main concern now is stopping the bleeding."
I glance down at the clipboard that has found its way into my hands. It's a standard release for surgery. I see words like exploratory surgery, removal of damaged organs, but when my eyes see the word Caesarean, I freeze. I feel the blood drain out of my face.
"The baby?" I manage to ask.
"Right now the baby is alive. The heartbeat is strong and the baby doesn't appear to be harmed in any way. But, with the amount of blood Isabella is losing, it's imperative that we do a Caesarean, to try to save them both," Rich tells me.
"It's too soon. The baby will never survive..." Bella will never forgive me if we lose the baby and she survives. We tried so long for this baby. I begin to panic.
"Edward!" Rich yells. "Listen to me, the baby is approximately thirty-two weeks. We will give your wife some corticosteroid before surgery, to help with lung development, but we have to remove the baby or both of them could die. We have an excellent NICU here, and everything will be done to save them both. You need to think as a doctor and not a husband and father, as hard as it is. But we need to do this now!"
"Edward!" I hear my mother yell. I turn to see her running toward me in tears. She wraps her arms around me and reality sets in. I grab the clipboard and sign my name. Rich takes it from me and squeezes my shoulder as he turns to leave.
I grab his arm. "Please, Rich."
"We'll do everything humanly possible for your wife and child. I'll keep you informed," he tells me as he walks away.
A nurse accompanies us to a large, private waiting room. I'm numb as I sink into the couch. I can't think, I can't breathe. This cannot be happening. I bury my head in my hands. I don't know how long I stay in this position before I feel hands running up and down my back. I glance up to find my entire family has arrived.
My mother tries to smile at me. "She's strong, Edward. Perhaps the strongest person I've ever known. She's a fighter."
"But if the baby doesn't make it, she'll hate me."
"Bella could never hate you. That girl has been in love with you since she was sixteen years old."
I wipe my hand down my face. "Damn, did everyone know that except me?" I ask my mother.
"God, Mom, I've wasted so much time. If I lose her... I can't... I won't survive without her." The tears are falling and I don't even try to hide them. Before I know it, my mother has me in her arms.
"Don't think that way, Edward. We are not going to lose her."
Time has almost stopped. Every time I look at the clock, only minutes have passed. Alice comes in with coffee for everyone, but I can't seem to get it past the lump in my throat. I pace the small room, I threaten to go to the O.R. myself to find out what's happening. I finally settle into a small chair and pray.
"What time is it?" I ask through my hands that cover my face.
"Eight fifteen," Jasper answers.
"It's taking too long. Why is it taking so damn long?" I almost shout. The door to the waiting room opens and Rich walks in, still dressed in his O.R. scrubs and a lab coat. I notice the fresh blood on his shoes. I try to open my mouth, but it's frozen shut. Everyone in the room stands up.
"Sit, please. Everyone sit," Rich tells us. "Okay. Isabella is still in surgery. They are repairing her leg as we speak. It was shattered and they are placing a rod to stabilize the bones. We had to remove her spleen, because it had ruptured. There was a small laceration on her liver, but we were able to repair that without difficulty. We did run into a problem on the table. She went into cardiac arrest from blood loss, but we were able to correct the problem and her vitals are strong."
I am incapable of speaking. Bella's alive! Thank you, God. I finally found my voice and managed to ask when I could see her. I needed to see her for myself, to know that she's still with me.
"As soon as she arrives in the recovery room I will take you up."
I nod at him. He places his hands on my shoulders, causing me to look at him.
"While you wait, would you like to meet your daughter?"
My mouth hits the floor.
"Daughter?" I whisper.
"Yes, you have a beautiful little girl." Rich smiles at me. "She's tiny, four pounds, three ounces, but she is strong and for the most part healthy. She'll on a ventilator until her lung function tests come back, but otherwise she is perfect."
We have a daughter. I smile for the first time in hours. The baby's okay. Once again, my emotions steal my ability to speak.
"I'll take you up to the NICU. Dr. Kate Wellington is taking care of her. She's one of the top neonatal physicians at Harborview. She can answer any questions you may have."
I'm torn between leaving before I see Bella and the desire to meet my daughter. As if he can read my mind, Rich tells me he will be paged as soon as her surgery is complete. I nod my head and follow my family and Rich to the elevator.
The NICU is located two floors down from the trauma center. One entire wall is glass, but the blinds are closed sealing off the babies from the viewing public. Visiting hours were over ages ago, so there should be no one to gaze at the tiny babies. They will only allow two people in at a time, so Mom and I scrub our hands in the small room outside the huge nursery.
We're told to put on gloves and masks so there is no risk of us transferring any germs to the babies. As we are about to enter the room a tall, matronly woman joins us.
"Edward," Rich says. "This is Dr. Kate Wellington. She will be taking care of your little girl."
I reach out to shake her hand, but notice the gloves and give her a small smile instead.
"It's a pleasure, Dr. Cullen," Dr. Wellington says. "I've heard nothing but good things about you and your work."
I nod my head; nothing matters to me at this moment, except my wife and daughter, who are still at risk.
"Your daughter's birth was fairly routine considering the circumstances. There didn't appear to be any damage to your wife's uterus, so the baby suffered no external damage." She stops and smiles at me.
"As a matter of fact, your daughter made quite the entrance. Once we had the uterus open her arm popped up, with her fist up, giving us a power salute. She cried on her own after suctioning. We have placed her on a ventilator, only as a precaution. If her tests come back, the way I suspect, they will, we'll wean her off of the machine over the next twenty-four hours. She is small, as you've been told, four pounds, three ounces and sixteen inches long. If she had been full term you would be looking at a good ten to eleven pound baby."
I hear nothing else as we reach an incubator with a tiny, perfect little baby, wrapped in pink blankets. She has a full head of bronze colored hair, with full lips, that wrap around a white tube that is down her tiny throat. I can barely breathe as I look at her.
"Oh, Edward." My mother gasps. "She looks exactly like you did when you were born, only smaller."
"Can I touch her?" I ask Dr. Wellington.
"Absolutely. We encourage it. I'd prefer you to wait until we remove the ventilator before you pick her up, but it shouldn't be too long."
I reach in and stroke her hand. I gasp as she wraps her tiny fingers around my pinky finger. She has quite a grip for such a little thing. Mom reaches in and touches her cheek and I swear she grins.
I kneel down beside the incubator.
"Hey, baby girl, I'm your Dad." I can barely get the words out. "Your Mom is going to be so happy to meet you. She is going to be so pissed that she missed out on meeting you first."
I look up when I hear Mom laugh. She has tears running down her cheeks.
"She is perfect, Edward, just perfect."
I don't know how long I kneel there, next to my daughter's crib. I'm amazed that Bella and I created such a beautiful creature.
A nurse comes over to check some of the print outs that are coming from the machine attached to my daughter.
"She a beauty. Do you have a name picked out?"
I look up at her. "Yes, I think so, but I'd like to wait for my wife to make it official, if that's okay?"
"Sure, there's no rush. We'll call her baby girl for now." She smiles at me and leaves us alone.
I hear a noise and look up. They have raised the blinds in front of the window closest to the incubator. I see my entire family with a look of awe on the faces. Everyone is there, on the other side of the window. Everyone – except Bella.
I've lost track of time as I stare at my beautiful daughter. My heart clenches when I realize that the two most important females in my life are fighting for their lives. I silently pray for them both. They desperately need each other – and I need them – both.
Dr. Kirby walks into the nursery and places his hand on my shoulder.
"Edward, your wife is in recovery if you want to see her."
I stand and wipe the tears from my face. I nod my head and tell my mother that I will be back shortly.
Rich and I make our way to the elevators. The ride up to the surgical suite is silent. When we arrive outside the recovery room door, he stops me.
"I want you to know that she looks worse than she is. She has a lot of bruises and lacerations, but her vitals are strong and while she is not out of the woods yet, things look much better than they did a few hours ago."
I'm unable to speak. I am anxious to see Bella, to know that she is alive and breathing. I need to know she is still with me. Rich pushes open the door and leads the way to the back of the long room. There are several patients, scattered throughout the darkened room. I hear the beeping and clicking of machines that are helping in their recovery.
Toward the back of the room there is a patient lying on a stretcher. There is a ventilator clicking every few seconds, several IV's are attached to her small body. I freeze where I stand and take in the sight before me. Everything seems to move in slow motion. My eyes lock on the drops of blood flowing into her veins. Then they travel down to the plastic bag that is hooked to the bottom of the bed that is partially filled with her blood. My medical training lets me know it's the result of a chest tube. My brain registers that this is a very damaged body. That body is my beloved Bella.
I raise my eyes to her face, it's swollen and bruised. Both of her eyes are blackened, there are several cuts on her left cheek, not deep enough for stitches, probably a result of the air bag. Her beautiful hair is caked with dried blood. I can see the top of the gauze bandages peeking out from the top of her gown, a sign that she has undergone surgery.
Her right leg is encased in a cast up to her mid-thigh. Somehow, I notice her fingers. Her nails are chipped and cracked. For a brief moment, it flashes through my head how upset she would be about her nails. Slowly, my eyes go back to her face. I fight to stop the urge to run to the nearest trashcan and vomit everything I've ever eaten in my entire life. I take a deep breath and step forward.
"I'll give you some time," Rich tells me. I swallow and nod, still unable to speak.
I pull up a stool as close to the bed as possible and sit down, never taking my eyes off Bella's face. I run my finger down her cheek, before I take her small hand in mine, being careful not to disturb any of the tubing attached to her body.
"Oh, Bella," I whisper. "I'm so scared. I don't think I've ever been so scared in my entire life." I keep my eyes on her face, hoping for some sign that she can hear me.
"We have a little girl. She's the most beautiful baby I've ever seen. I'm not just saying that because she's ours, she really is. She has my hair; sorry about that, but she has your nose and your mouth. I'm not sure about her eyes, yet, she was sleeping when I saw her, but I hope she has yours. Your beautiful, soulful brown eyes. She needs you, Bella. She needs her mom... I need you."
I rest my head on the bed, keeping my eyes on her face. I've taken so much for granted. Things like this don't happen to us. They happen to other people, and I fix them. That's my job. People get hurt and I repair them.
God, what a selfish bastard I am. Always have been. I took this sweet, beautiful woman as my wife for my own selfish reasons. She has loved me, unconditionally, since she was sixteen years old. Everyone knew it except me. My mother knew it, my sister knew it. Even Bella, herself had told me. I was so blind, all I was worried about was beating my father at his own game.
Is this my punishment? Is this what I get for being such a pompous ass? I'm no better than my father. I use people to get what I want, now I have to pay the price. Yes, I fell in love with Bella, but how many times had she suffered in silence before I opened my eyes and realized what I had?
I wipe the tears from my face and make a promise to Bella and to God. A promise I will keep until my dying day.
"Bella, I promise you I will never take your love for granted again. Nothing is more important to me than you and our daughter. To hell with the Cullen Corporation, to hell with the Free Clinics, to hell with everything. All I need is you and our daughter. But, baby, I need you to come back to me, okay? I promise you that I will be the best husband and father I can be. I promise that you will never have a reason to doubt my love for you. I love you so much, and I'm sorry it took me so long to realize it. I love you, Bella."
I kiss her hand, I kiss her undamaged cheek. I whisper over and over again how much I love her and need her. I stay with her until the sun comes up the next morning and they need to move her to ICU.
I spend the next few days running between Bella's room and the NICU. The baby is doing wonderfully. They wean her off the ventilator, and she is breathing on her own and gaining weight every day. The first time I held her I thought my heart would explode with love. She was so tiny, that when I placed her head in the palm of my hand her feet barely reached my forearm. She has one hell of a grip, too. Her tiny fingers curl halfway around my pinky finger, but she held on with all her might. I make sure I'm there to feed her every two hours. My mother is pushing me to name her, but I refuse to do so until Bella is with us. Everyone, including me, call her Little Girl for now.
Bella was kept sedated and on a ventilator for a few days after her surgery. The physician in me knows it's to aid in her recovery, to allow her to rest and heal, but as her husband it was heart breaking. She is off the ventilator and breathing on her own; now I just need her to wake up.
I'm standing at the nurses' station, flipping through Bella's chart, while the nurse gives her a bath, when I hear a loud 'whoop' come from the elevator. I turn and stare in shock.
"Emmett?" I say, as I watch my brother come my way. "What the hell are you doing here?" I hug my big brother and look at him in surprise.
"I came to meet my niece. She's a real beauty, little bro. Didn't know you had it in you," he tell me with a big, goofy grin on his face.
He holds my shoulders in his big hands and looks at me hard. "You, on the other hand, look like shit."
"It's been a rough week," I tell him. "Where's Rosalie?"
"Still up in the nursery with Mom. I may never tear her away from the nursery. Babies everywhere."
He shudders and I can't help laughing.
"How's Bella, bro?"
"Broken," I tell him.
The door to Bella's room opens and the nurse smiles at me and tells me she's finished. Emmett and I walk into the room. Emmett walks over to her bedside, and then looks at me over his shoulder.
"Man, she looks like Sleeping Beauty... or Pocahontas." He grins.
"Yeah, Alice thought it would be a good idea to braid her hair, to keep it from getting tangled while she sleeps."
We stand there staring at my beautiful wife, neither of us knowing what to say. Emmett reaches out and takes Bella's hand in his. He runs his thumb over her knuckles, before he bends down and kisses her forehead. He settles down in the chair next to her bed.
"How are you holding up?" he asks me.
I frown at him. "I'm okay," I state.
"Really? You look almost as bad as her."
The door flies open and two nurses walk in with a stretcher. "Sorry to interrupt, Dr. Cullen, but it's time for Mrs. Cullen's physical therapy. Dr. Kirby wants a couple of x-rays to check her ribs. We're going to get that out of the way first before we do her P.T. She'll probably be gone for forty-five minutes or so, if you want to go spend some time with your daughter." The nurse smiles at me.
I help them transfer her to the stretcher, and lean down to kiss her, telling her I'll see her soon. I watch as they roll my wife out of the room. Then I slump down in a chair and run my fingers through my hair.
"Let's go, Edward," Emmett tells me, grabbing my arm and pulling me up.
"I'm not leaving. I need to be here when she comes back."
He stares at me. "I'm sure they can call you when she is back. The sun is shining and you know how rare that is here. You need to get out of here, even if it's only to the solarium outside. Now get your ass up or I'll throw you over my shoulder and carry you out."
Maybe he's right. Maybe I need to get some fresh air. I stop at the nurses' station and tell them to call my cell if Bella returns before I get back.
Emmett and I stop at the kiosk in the lobby and get coffee, before making our way to the solarium and settling on a bench. The sun feels good on my face, so I lean back and close my eyes.
"Edward, what happened? I know she was hit by a truck, but that's all Mom said when she called."
"She had a doctor's appointment. I wanted to go with her, but I had a meeting here, in Seattle. She insisted I go to the meeting." I shudder, thinking how stupid that was.
"The weather was really shitty, it was raining and sleeting. Apparently a logging truck lost his brakes and T-boned the passenger side of her car." I run my hands down my face. "If it had hit the driver's side, I would have lost them both. I almost lost them anyway." My voice cracked, and I took a deep breath.
"Jasper has seen the car. There's not much left. God, Emmett, if I lose her..."
Emmett's arm goes around my shoulders.
"You really love her, don't you?"
I look at my brother like he's lost his mind. "She's my life." It's all I can say.
Emmett doesn't say anything for a few minutes. Then he leans back and turns his head to look at me hard.
"It wasn't always that way, though, was it?"
"What are you talking about?"
"Come on, Edward. I know everyone thinks I'm a dumb jock, but I know why you married her."
We stare at each other, neither of us saying a word. Emmett breaks the stand-off.
"I'm not stupid. Dad demands that you marry someone acceptable or else, then suddenly you're madly in love with Bella. Very convenient if you ask me. I've always known how Bella felt about you, it's written all over her face, but I also know you, and you were a major player. You like bad girls, Edward. Maybe that was your way of spitting in Dad's face, but it really sucked, dude."
Emmett is glaring at me, and I don't have the strength to argue with him, because he's right. I feel the tears fill my eyes. All my mistakes are coming back to bite me in the ass. I was a selfish bastard and now that I have everything, I'm going to lose it all. Bella's is fighting for her life, because I put my needs first.
"I always thought Alice was the perceptive one," I say softly, unable to look at him.
"Hell, Alice still believes in fairy tales, witches, and vampires." He snorts. "I love you, Edward, but that was really fucked up. That little girl loves you with every ounce of her being and for you to..."
He stands up and starts pacing, clenching and unclenching his fist.
"It wasn't like that, Emmett," I plead with him. "She knew from the start. Hell, she offered to marry me. I didn't know what else to do."
"So you married her, acted like you loved her... Look, I believe you love her now, I can see it. Bella has a way of wrapping herself around your heart, but it pisses me off that you were so determined to beat Dad that you used her. It must have been great for you, Edward. You take a sweet, innocent girl, who loves you completely, sleep with her, get everything you wanted from Dad, then what? If you hadn't fallen in love with her, what would you have done, just dumped her? Thanks a lot, Bella. See you around."
My eyes fly up to his. "NO! Damn it, Emmett, it wasn't like that."
I try to stand, but my legs are like rubber so I stay where I am.
"We had an understanding, everything was in writing. It was stupid and idiotic. I know that now, but at the time..." I stop, trying to think.
"I never slept with her." I look up at my brother and see the shock on his face. "She was a virgin, I couldn't take that away from her."
Emmett sits down next to me, never taking his eyes off of mine.
"Let me understand this. You never had sex with Bella -"
"Not until after the second time we married," I interrupt him. "Not until I knew I was just as much in love with her as she was with me."
"Damn!" Emmett says. "That was what, five, six years?"
"Five. We remarried on our fifth anniversary. Even though I knew I was in love with Bella, I wanted her first time to be on her wedding night. Our real wedding night."
"So you cheated on her."
"No. I couldn't. I felt guilty enough for everything without doing that."
"You're going to sit here and tell me that you went five years without sex?"
"We... did other things, but never actual sex." I feel my face heat up. Why was this so hard?
"Emmett, listen to me. Everything I did, everything you said, it's all true. I was selfish and wanted to prove Carlisle wrong. I only thought of myself. I'm no better than Carlisle. Bella knew what the deal was, and she accepted it. She never asked me for anything. Hell, she fought me when I wanted to give her anything. She didn't expect anything from me. She got under my skin, she was, no she is my best friend. One day it hit me that I didn't want anything but her. I don't know how or exactly when, but I fell in love with her and fell hard."
I took a deep breath.
"Remember, when all the shit happened with Victoria?"
Emmett nods.
"When Alice confronted me and told me that Bella had seen the kiss, which was completely innocent, it hit me like a ton of bricks. I raced home so I could explain what happened, but she didn't come home."
"Wait, what do you mean she didn't come home? She left you?" Emmett asks.
"No. Alice thought it would be a good idea to take her out for a few drinks before bringing her home. It was hours, Emmett. Hours that I paced that apartment thinking I'd lost her. Thinking she wouldn't come home. I can tell you, nothing has ever hurt like the thought of losing her. When she finally came home, she was a little drunk and I lost my temper. Another of my smart moves. She went to bed and wouldn't talk to me. Then we had that stupid dinner of Carlisle's to go to, and he went off on her and she punched him, and broke her hand. Later that night when I started to tell her the truth, that's when... well you know... when Carlisle died. With the funeral and everything, it took days before I had the chance to tell her how I felt." I stop, because the memories are too hard. The tears are falling down my face, and I don't even care that I'm crying like a little child in front of my big brother.
I feel his arms encircle me, hugging me tight. I don't deserve his comfort. I don't deserve Bella's love. But, if I get the chance, I will earn it.
"Edward," Emmett says, making me look at him. "You're a lucky man."
I stare at him in shock.
"Bella loves you. That makes you very lucky. She is a very special person. And if she loves you, you can't be all that bad."
I snort. "Thanks, I think."
"But, if you ever hurt her, I will destroy you." He glares at me, and I know he means it.
I swallow hard and nod. My phone chirps and when I answer they tell me Bella is back in her room.
Emmett walks me back in, but we part at the elevator. He is going to see my little girl and try to pry his wife away from all the babies. He slaps me on the back and tells me he is stealing my dogs, which have been staying at my mother's house since the accident. Apparently, Jasper took them there so they wouldn't be alone, since Mom now has live in help. I'm grateful my boys are being cared for.
I walk into Bella's room and take my place next to her side. I lean over and kiss her gently, running my finger down her cheek.
"Hi, beautiful. Emmett and Rosalie are here. They've fallen in love with our little girl, too."
I watch her face for any sign that she hears me. Nothing.
"Emmett knows everything. Who knew? He said he's known all along. We thought we were so good at fooling everyone. Well, we did fool everyone else. He swears no one else knows. He won't kill me as long as I promise to never hurt you. I won't. Never again, Bella. I need you to wake up, baby, so I can prove to you how important you are to me."
I lie my head down on the side of her bed. I'm exhausted, but I feel the need to be as close to her as possible. I fall asleep staring at her beautiful face.
I don't know how long I sleep, but I wake up to the feel of something crawling in my hair. In my half-awake state, I reach up and slap at whatever is crawling on my head. I freeze when my hand feels fingers. I grab hold and raise my head. My eyes meet the most beautiful brown eyes staring at me.
"Bella?" I cry. I hold her fingers in my hand. She has been running her fingers through my hair.
"Edward?" Her voice is low and raspy from lack of use. Her face is confused.
I jump up and place my hands on each side of her face. "Oh, Bella, thank God."
"What happened? Where am I? Why..."
"Ssh," I tell her. "You're in the hospital. You were in an accident, but you're going to be okay."
I reach for the button to call the nurse, never taking my eyes off her face. She tried to move, but cries out in pain.
"Don't try to move, sweetheart. You have broken ribs, and went through major surgery, so everything is going to hurt for a while, but you're going to be okay, I promise."
The nurse answers the call button. "Yes, Dr. Cullen."
"Bella's awake, can you call Dr. Kirby?"
"Certainly, sir," she crackles back.
I watch as Bella's hand slides down her stomach. I see the panic in her face.
"Edward! Oh, God, Edward, the baby!"
I grab her hands. "She fine, Bella, she's fine. She's right upstairs in the nursery. She's absolutely perfect."
"She?" Bella whispers.
"Yes! We have the most beautiful little girl." I grin.
"But, it's too soon..." she cries.
"She's tiny, but she's perfect, I promise." Bella and I both have tears flowing down our faces.
The door flies open and Charlotte, the night nurse walks in.
"Well, hello there, Mrs. Cullen. It's good to see your eyes open. Dr. Kirby is on his way," she says to me.
Charlotte flutters around, taking Bella's blood pressure and asking her routine questions.
"Your blood pressure is a bit high, but that's to be expected when you first wake up. How do you feel?"
"Everything hurts," Bella tells her.
"I'm sure it does. I can get you something for the pain, but I'd like to wait for the doctor, if you think you can stand it for a bit more."
Bella nods.
Everything seems to happen at once. Dr. Kirby arrives and gives Bella a quick physical and mental evaluation. He arranges for her to have a PCA pump, a pain controlling administrating pump, which allows her to control her pain by pushing a button when she needs it.
Bella doesn't say much, only answering the questions she is asked. When Rich asks if she has any questions, all she wants to know is when she can see our daughter.
Rich laughs. "It's two in the morning. Try and get some more rest, and I'll talk to Dr. Wellington in the morning and see what we can do."
I know this doesn't satisfy Bella, but she nods. Everyone clears out of her room, leaving us alone. I can tell she is in pain and is confused. I explain about the accident, and the surgery that was necessary to save both of their lives. Bella almost laughs when I tell her how our little girl entered the world.
"She gave the power salute?" Bella laughs, softly.
"That's what they tell me."
"You weren't there?"
"No, they wouldn't let me in the operating room. Even though I'm a physician, I'm family. I thought I was going to get arrested, I fought with them so hard."
"We both missed her birth," Bella says, sadly. "But, she's really okay? You swear?"
"Bella, she is perfect. She needed help to breathe for the first twenty hours or so, but she is fine, now."
"I need to see her," Bella sobs.
"You will, baby, soon." I rub my hand up and down her arm.
Bella dozes in and out. She is stubborn about taking the pain medicine, so I have to push the button when I can tell she's in pain. She glares at me, but I'm okay with it, when I see the pain ease up.
I'm still staring at Bella's face when the sun comes up. There are a lot of people coming in and out of her room, checking her vitals, asking her questions, taking blood, and I can see it's taking a toll on her. When they come to take her to x-ray, I tell her I'm going to go feed our daughter and I see the tears in her eyes. She tries to hide them, and it breaks my heart.
"Tell her that I love her," Bella says, sadly. "And take pictures of her, so I can at least see what she looks like."
I give our little girl her bottle, and then spend the next few minutes on the phone conference calling with Rich and Kate. I need to give Bella a definite time when she'll be able to meet her daughter. Plans are discussed, as well as test results and a decision is made.
I know Bella is probably back in her room. My family follows me down to her room. Emmett pushes open the door to her room, only wide enough to stick his head in.
"Hey, Bella! You up for some visitors?" My brother asks, loudly.
"Sure," I hear Bella answer. I can hear how tired her voice sounds. I hope what I'm about to do will cheer her up.
Emmett walks into the room, followed by Rosalie, Alice and Jasper. Emmett walks over to her and kisses her forehead. Everyone starts telling her how beautiful our daughter is and I can see the excitement and sadness on her face as I peek through the crack in the door. I hear the elevator doors open and smile. I push open Bella's door.
"Are you all annoying my wife?" I groan.
"No, Edward, it's fine," Bella says.
"Do you think you can stand one more visitor?"
Bella nods, but doesn't look all that thrilled.
"Good, because there's someone who is dying to meet you." I walk back out the door and pick up our little girl.
The look on Bella's face as I walk to her is priceless. Her eyes are wide and her mouth is open, tears running down her face.
"Little girl, I would like to introduce you to your mommy. She's been waiting a long time for you." I place a soft kiss on her tiny forehead, and gently place her in Bella's waiting arms.
Bella stares at the little bundle in her arms. She slowly runs her fingers through her hair, and down her cheek. She looks at her little hands and feet.
"Edward?"
"Yes, sweetheart?"
"Thank you," she cries. "She is perfect. Thank you so much."
I feel my eyes fill with tears - tears of happiness and gratefulness. I've never felt as much love in my life as I feel in this room, at this moment.
Bella looks up and giggles at the expressions on everyone's faces.
I introduce Bella to Dr. Wellington and Linda, the NICU nurse who had to accompany us due to legal issues, and tell her how wonderful they have been taking care of our daughter. Kate answers every question Bella has and assures her that the baby is doing wonderfully and hasn't suffered from any major issues due to the accident and premature delivery.
I can see Bella is getting tired, and seems to be in pain. I'm ready to take the baby from her when Mom walks up to the bed.
"Can we finally give this little girl a name?" my mother asks.
Bella looks at me and frowns. "You didn't name her?"
"I was waiting for you. I'm pretty sure you'd want the first one we came up with, but I couldn't do it without you." I tell her as I sat by her side, holding both my girls.
"She looks like the first one we discussed," she tells me.
We look at each other and then smile at our family.
Bella takes a deep breath.
"In honor of all the grandparents who can't be here with us today, to celebrate this wonderful gift, Edward and I would like to introduce you to Carlie Renee Cullen."
I lean down and kiss my wife, then kiss my daughter. Everyone agrees the name is perfect.
I almost have to fight Bella to take the baby back to the nursery, but Kate promised her she would bring her down for her next feeding and that seems to placate her. She kisses Carlie and tells her she loves her before handing her back to the nurse.
Everyone leaves and Bella finally pushes her pain button herself. I very carefully maneuver Bella into my arms. Her head lies on my chest.
"Bella?"
"Hmm?"
"Thank you."
"For what?" she asks, looking up at me.
"For never giving up on me, for being the most wonderful wife in the world, for giving me the most perfect baby in the world, but most importantly, for coming back to me."
She chuckles. "Cullen, you aren't getting rid of me that easy." She looks up at me and smiles, and then her eyes fill with tears. "Edward, I think I fell in love with you before I even met you. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I would be here, married to you and having a baby with you, so thank you."
I kiss my wife deeply, hoping she feels all the love I have for her. I stroke her hair as she falls asleep on my chest.
"Thank you, God," I whisper.
A/N: Whew! Sorry I haven't responded to all of your reviews, but as you know FF.n has been a pain! One more chapter and epilogue.