Author's notes: This is the continuation of the last chapter. I changed my mind about it being about Neji. Warnings for this one include language, a rather frank discussion about reproduction, and a slightly graphic ending.
Hate
Hinata is nervous. She sits upon the high examining table in a small, pristine room of Konoha's hospital, and swings her legs back and forth in agitation. Her fine clothes are gone, taken away by a pretty young nurse, and she is wearing only a thin cotton yukata that leaves her feeling far too exposed and lets the chill of the metal seep into her body. Oh, if only Sakura would hurry up!
Perhaps I should have just seen the family doctor, she thinks, before quickly dismissing the idea. Although the Hyuga have their own personal physician on call at all hours, that does not guarantee the best service. Certainly she would feel uncomfortable being examined by a male doctor, and anyway, the old man probably could not keep a secret. Her business- this most important, private business- would be all over the compound within moments.
Just one more thing the first born failed at.
There is a polite knock on the door and Hinata blushes and pulls the yukata further down over her hips. Sakura Haruno strides in wearing a white lab coat, long pink hair pulled back and emerald eyes shining bright. "How are you today, Hinata?" she asks, shutting the door quietly behind her. The doctor turns to look at the younger woman, and smiles. It has been more than a month since she last saw her friend, was a guest at Hinata's quickly pulled together wedding. "I suppose you are keeping Naruto busy."
At any other time in her life, Hinata probably would have fainted dead away at the other woman's rather sexual insinuation. As it is, she just frowns and glances away, eyes alighting on a poster describing the proper hand-washing technique. Her voice is almost inaudible, and she struggles to keep the newly returned stutter at bay. "Yes, we've been very busy."
Sakura senses her good friend's distress. "What's wrong? They haven't moved Hanabi's trial up, have they?"
Hinata drags her eyes away from the poster and shakes her head. It has been four months since her sister was thrown in prison for murdering the man who raped her. Hanabi has so far refused to tell the truth about the incident, too ashamed and worried about what others might think to save her skin. Despite everyone's best efforts, time is running out. If the girl does not speak up soon, the authorities will find her guilty of a the heinous crime. Her baby sister is on trial for her very life.
"No, and Naruto and I are doing everything we can to get the charges dropped, or at least reduced. To be honest, they don't even have any evidence other than the mother's testimony and a doctor who will say he was murdered by a Gentle Fist strike to the heart."
"She isn't guilty, is she?" Sakura lays the manila file folder she has carried in onto the worn nearby desk, then turns back to Hinata with her hands clasped. "I mean, there's more to it than murder, isn't there?"
Hinata is not sure how much to say without compromising the investigation and ruining her sister's chances at having her life restored to her, but she trusts her friend and fellow kunoichi implicitly. She meets the curious green gaze and whispers what little she can. "I can't tell you what happened. I mean, I had better not. Hanabi did kill him, that much is true. But… there were extenuating circumstances."
Sakura just nods, dropping into her rolling chair, and they sit in silence for a good while, a clock on the wall ticking off the minutes. Finally, the pretty doctor speaks up. "So, what are you here for?"
This time, Hinata does almost faint, but she pulls herself back together at the last moment because this matter is of the gravest importance. She is the one that came here and asked for help, after all. Blushing furiously, she manages to stammer out, "I- I'm trying to get pregnant."
Sakura nods, and makes a quick note in the folder. The medical kunoichi is cannot claim to be surprised by Hinata's revelation. The outside opinion in the village has always been that the Hyuga seem to reproduce like rabbits. "Go on," she urges her friend, not really excited to hear about Naruto's sexual prowess, but eager to help.
"And I can't." Hinata finishes weakly, shifting her body back and forth and bringing up her hands in the old, familiar nervous habit.
Sakura laughs then, gently. "Hinata, you were married only a month ago! You know that it doesn't always happen right away. These things are natural, and they take time. Plus, with all that's going on, you're highly stressed right now. Carrying a baby would be difficult."
"Please don't laugh." Hinata does not really know why, but it hurts, her close friend giggling at her like this. She squeezes her pearlescent eyes closed, waits a moment for the hot tears to dissipate. After a steadying breath, she starts again. "Sakura, I don't want to sound childish or anything, but I've really been trying much longer than that. I'd say more than six months now. No results. I- I haven't even been a day late."
Sakura leans forward now, her full attention upon the case. Hinata's story is becoming rather interesting. Who new that the Hyuga heiress and Naruto were getting intimate before their marriage? Not uncommon, but truth be told, the doctor did not think her well-bred friend had it in her. "Alright, but that's still not really that long. We're talking what, six months at the most?" Hinata nods and Sakura continues, "And what makes you think it's your fault anyway? Naruto probably can't shoot straight."
As children undergoing puberty, they had once viewed a film about reproduction which contained images of deformed sperm swimming around in circles, and it is this memory that features prominately in the both women's minds. Sakura still finds it hilarious, but Hinata, now desperate for a baby, just finds it very sad. With a quiet sigh, the new bride hands over a medical file that she had swiped earlier from the Hyuga records room. "This was my mother's. It... It contains her medical history."
Sakura flips open the proffered folder and begins to read. Her green eyes widen with every line she reads; this story, that of a woman dead nearly sixteen years, is truly shocking. After some time, during which neither woman speaks, the pretty doctor turns and places the heavy file on the desk next to the first. "That was... very interesting." She pauses a moment to slip on a rubber glove. "I'm sorry, Hinata, but I'm going to have to do an examination."
"I thought you'd say that," Hinata whispers, lying carefully back upon the table. Before she can dwell upon the rising feelings of immodesty, she brings her knees up and lets the thin hospital robe fall away.
When the first cold instrument touches her center, she squeezes her eyes shut and says a prayer for the best.
Hanabi paces her small and spartan cell, heavy blanket wrapped tightly around her. Fifteen feet one way, twelve another. This is her thousandth circuit today, some sort of record, perhaps, but she is not keeping track. Not of that anyway. It has been four months since she was locked away here in this hellhole. In that time, summer has passed, and fall has nearly run its course. Four whole months. And for slightly less, she has known the awful, unwelcome truth; there is a baby growing inside of her.
Hanabi had no period that first month. Normally this would not have worried her, for she had skipped quite a few during her short years of menstruation. Hinata had told her that it was because she was so active. But she had never before had intercourse, and the continually absent blood left her feeling sick and worried. Finally, one night after lights out, she lay down and very carefully examined herself with her Byakugan. It was strange, peering through her own body like that, and she felt sick when she saw it there: her fetus.
The teenager will not call it her baby, she absolutely refuses to do so. This is something forced upon her, something she had never wanted, something her own body betrayed her by creating. And now the horrid thing is growing, causing unwelcome changes within her young body. Hanabi hates it with a passion, and would gladly be rid of it, save that she has no way to do so without attracting the attention of her guards. And she does not want them to know. If they figure this out, they'll eventually know the whole truth.
And so Hanabi hides her disgusting weight gain, slight though it is, under her dark blanket and a lie that she does not want to leave her cell for exercise. Instead, she paces round and round, desperate to keep her secret. If she can just hide it for another two months she will take the stand at her trial and tell the world contemptible Akihiro Kiyama was, and how glad she is that he is dead. Then they will haul her off and execute her and no one will ever know how weak she was, and the shame she has suffered.
Just two more months, she thinks as she pauses in her rounds and rests her head against the cool and rusty prison bars. For the first time she feels the child stir in her womb, no more than a flutter, and Hanabi, little more than a child herself, presses hand to her belly in response. "I hate you."
Her whisper goes unheard in the darkness.
Hinata has shrugged her newly returned clothing back on by the time Sakura returns from the laboratory. While waiting on her friend to finsh making some notes in her medical chart, the heiress settles herself once again on the examining table and frowns. Her stomach churns nervously, and her delicate hands, resting in her lap, begin to tremble. She cannot shake the feeling that something is horribly wrong, that the tests have revealed some permanent disability...
On the other side of the small room, Sakura sighs loudly and leans back in her cushioned chair. The doctor rubs her aching temples for a moment, blinks her bright eyes a few times. She hates to give this unwelcome news to her friend, and wants to do it gently. She has seen women ruined by less. "Hinata, I... Well, first of all-"
Hinata glances down toward the ground, observing the polished black and white tile there, and gives a weak little smile. "It's okay, Sakura. Please just tell me." She forces herself to breathe slowly, and reminds herself that she is not a weak little genin anymore, but the reinstated heir to the clan and the wife of the Hokage. She can handle this situation, whatever her medically inclined friend says. She will have to.
"Hinata, it's very obvious that your mother had some reproductive issues. She miscarried numerous times, and for no apparent reason. If the file that you brought me is correct, then she also had plenty of opportunities to become pregnant, but often didn't. You may have inherited these problems from her. Have your periods always been regular?"
The Hyuga shrugs slightly, too disappointed to give a more committed response. She has never told anyone about the sporadic and spotty bleeding before, although she had once advised Hanabi that the girl's own missing menstruation was nothing to be particularly worried about. Raised by a widower father, the subject had been practically taboo. Even now, she cannot really put it into words. "I always thought it was from training so hard."
Sakura shakes her pink head in denial. "That's sometimes the case, but given your family history, I don't think it's your problem. Hinata, I don't mean to sound crude, but the examination should your uterus to be almost… underdeveloped."
Hinata has to stifle her gasp with the hem of her kimono. She is barren. She should have known it. After failing at so many other things throughout her life, Hinata should not be at all surprised that she cannot manage to be a fertile woman. Wait until her father finds out that he has chosen an heir who can give the family no more heirs. And what will her husband think? "So, I won't be able to have a b-baby? Ever?"
Sakura frowns, and reaches for her friend's small but strong hand. She takes it in her own grip and gives a little squeeze, trying her best to be reassuring but honest. "I wouldn't say that you are physically incapable- nothing's impossible, you know- but it would be difficult to say the least. There would likely be complications, and in the worse case scenario, you and the baby could die. It would really be healthier for you to give up. I mean, there are other alternatives..."
Hinata withdraws her hand and stands up, bowing politely in her friend's general direction without really looking at her. With this latest news, she feels as though she will never be able to face anyone ever again. "Thank you so much, Sakura. I- I appreciate your frankness."
Hinata leaves very quietly, a shadow of the woman she had been before the examination. After she has gone, Sakura plants her head upon the desk and cries for her two friends.
It is surprisingly cold for late November. A chill wind blows down from the north, proving to be quite the unwelcome surprise for Konoha's fiery-veined citizens. Hinata, lost in her thoughts and wandering slowly home after her disastrous doctor's appointment, does not even notice the warm puffs of air that escape her mouth with every shallow breath. Her only desire is to return to the comfort of her new husband's arms, to be kissed and coddled and told that her barren state does not matter. But her feet, accustomed to a different path these last few months, have other plans.
"Lady Hinata?"
For the first time since leaving the hospital, Hinata lifts her moist eyes and finds herself at the guarded door of Konoha's prison.
The guard leaves her standing just inside the small cell, and Hinata waits until he is out of earshot before turning to look at her sister. For the second time that day, her heart breaks.
Hanabi does not look happy to see her. Her mouth is pursed, her brows lowered in anger. Her pale cheeks are gaunt, and there are shadows under her eyes. But the twin orbs still blaze defiance, and maybe something else. To Hinata, the teenager appears more frightened and wild than ever before. Confinement is slowly stripping the child's humanity, leaving nothing behind but a creature desperate to have its suffering ended.
"How are you Hanabi? Are they feeding you enough?" It is so hard for Hinata to see her sister like this. Why weren't they better friends when they had the chance?
White eyes stare back at Hinata for a long time, and she has to force herself not to fall prey to old habits and look away. Finally, Hanabi glances away. She shifts a little upon the small bed, wrapping the blanket tighter around her body. The girl answers in a tone that any sullen teenager might use. "Yes, I'm getting plenty to eat. Everyone treats me fine; they ignore me mostly. And before you even ask, I was the one who told them to cut my break time."
Hanabi does not say the truth; the secret baby is like a parasite, slowly sapping her strength. At this rate, she might die before the case even goes to trial. Not that she'd complain; death is still preferable to the whole village learning how far she has fallen.
Hinata tries again to talk sense into her sister. "All you have to do is tell the investigators what happened that night. We probably won't get the all the charges dropped, but I can't see them convicting you for murder. Maybe you could be placed under house arrest or something."
Hanabi laughs, and the sound is harsh and brittle. It seems to echo down the dark and damp hall. "Hinata, you and I both know that even though there were no witnesses they have enough evidence to find me guilty. His family will say that I went out with him, people will corroborate that, and some medical examiner will say he was killed by a Hyuga-style technique. Sure, it could have been some other Hyuga, but do you think anyone's going to fall for that if we bring it up? Think Neji is going to step in an take the rap for me? No. It's over."
The goodness in Hinata's heart quickly forgives her sister for lashing out. "B- But you don't have to die, Hanabi! If you t- tell the truth-"
"They'll either lock me away for a long time or, if everyone's sympathetic enough, I'll be removed from duty and returned to yourcustody. But neither of those options is worth the loss of my dignity. Now, I'd like you to go away. I'm tired." Her sister dismissed, Hanabi closes her red-rimmed eyes and focuses her wrathful mind inward. The damn baby lies heavily upon her today. If only the thing would just disappear...
"Hanabi, please. You are worth it, you're life is worth it. Hanabi, I love you!"
There is no reply. Hinata is once again on the verge of tears; this day just continues to get worse. Desperate for comfort, she reaches out to hug her baby sister, but the younger woman senses her intention. Hanabi's eyes snap open and she slides away, slinking to the farthest corner of her matress. Hinata is too distraught to wonder about the teenager's avoidence, is too blind to see another motive.
"Hanabi-"
"Guard! We're finsihed here!" Hanabi's yell is louder than Hinata would have ever thought possible, given the girl's neglected appearance. The steely tone in her voice covers the oilless screech of the opening cell door. When the guard takes Hinata gently by the elbow, the crying Hyuga heiress is too surprised by his arrival to protest being lead away.
Hanabi does not watch them leave.
On March twenty-seventh, her sixteenth birthday, the guard brings Hanabi an unwelcome bit of news:
Together, Naruto and Hiashi manage to push the trial back another two months. The first court date is scheduled for early April.
Hanabi grieves at the thought of holding onto her silence for a lengthier amount of time. Every day she lives brings her closer to the moment when she can no longer keep her secret, when they will drag her out of her dark cell into bright spring sunlight and everyone will notice just how tight her clothing has become. And then the whispers will start, perhaps sympathetic but most probably just oddly fascinated, and they will all know that she was the one thing she never wanted to be: the victim.
"I hate you," she whispers to the creature that is killing her so very slowly. She repeats it over and over again, and endless mantra of darkness. It is almost all she can say anymore.
Hinata shows up the day before Hanabi's court trial is set to begin, sobbing before they even let her inside the tiny cell. Once there, the gentle young woman throws her shoulders back and tries hard to look determined. In Hanabi's opinion, the effect is ruined by the tears coursing down her cheeks. "Hanabi, I can't take this anymore! For whatever it's worth, I'm going to testify for you. I'll tell them the truth, and maybe they will listen-"
The thought of Hinata upon the stand, sitting before the village elders and desperately keening out her tragic story is too much for Hanabi and her frail and raw nerves. After months in captivity, the teenager reaches the end of her fragile sanity. Summoning what little chakra she has left, Hanabi leaps awkwardly from the bed and moves toward her sister, her right hand raised to strike. "If you tell them what happened, I'll fucking kill you!"
A shocked Hinata easily dodges the first frantic attack. Hanabi's taijutsu, once fearsome, has grown quite rusty locked away here. Stepping further away from the rampaging girl, the still weeping Hinata tries again to calm her sister and regain control of the situation. "Hanabi, please calm down! You don't mean that!" But even if she does, even if Hanabi's words are not lies, Hinata is going to tell the jurors the truth.
She will save her little sister's life.
"I do! I hate you!" Hanabi's scream echoes loudly, her hand balling into a small fist. Another swing, this one coming closer. Hinata's back is nearly to the wall, so she steps inside the teenager's guard and strikes a few key chakra points in quick succession. Immediately, Hanabi loses all feeling in her right arm and leg, and collapses against her sister, leaning heavily. Hinata's white eyes widen as the young girl's hard, swollen stomach connects with her own flat one.
Worried that she has been busted, Hanabi scoots quickly away, dragging her betraying body across the rough stone floor to her favorite corner of the cell. Once there, she stands clumsily and curls in on herself, desperate to hide the sign of her fertility. It is far too late now, though: Hinata already has her own Byakugan activated and is examining her. Nothing escapes those divine eyes, not even the secrets of another user.
"Hanabi, you're-" Hinata cannot finish as she is suddenly overcome by emotion. Now the awful, looming trial can be postponed again, at least until after the baby is born and its DNA is used in a paternity test. Her little niece- the child is full near developed, and Hinata can tell its sex- will be the miracle that proves her testimony. The elders will have to believe that Hanabi was raped, that the murder was simply a girl overcome with emotion defending herself.
Hanabi is saved.
And then, to Hinata's everlasting horror, her sister reacts like a trapped animal, and she sees the chakra flare sudden and strong in her left hand, the one that is still functioning. Before the Hyuga heiress can step in, before she can stop the madness, Hanabi brings it down hard across her own fertile womb. Hinata sees the uterus explode like a dying star, darkest blood dribbling thickly down her sister's white legs. Hanabi's eyes roll up into her head, and she mercifully passes out, crumpling to the floor in a bloody heap.
Hinata does not realize that she is screaming until the guard appears outside the bars and calls her name.
Yeah, I know that was pretty dark, and a cliffhanger. I'm in no way done with this story arc, but the next time I write about it should be the last chapter. Then maybe I can move on to something a little happier. A big thank you to my reviewers.