Callie knew the name of the cemetery, but had to look it up for directions. Soon everyone was loaded into cars headed that direction. They decided for this part of the trip it would be best if the grandparents went in the van with Jesus, Mariana, and Brandon. Stef and Lena wanted to both be with Callie and Jude.

Right before they loaded into the cars, Callie found Stuart. "Um, Gramps, I am sorry about earlier. Instead of yelling at you, I should have explained that I wanted everything to be special. I just wanted for my siblings and I to serve all of you today and not make one of our guests work. Does that make sense?"

"It does. Actually, it makes a lot of sense. I told your moms that you probably had a good reason and you did." Stuart reached out to shake hands remembering that Callie was a little awkward with him before.

"I love you, Gramps!" Callie said as she reached to hug him.

"I love you, too, Callie." Stuart replied hugging her back.

Lena saw the interaction and beamed with pride. She walked over to them and Stuart included Lena in the hug.

Stef pulled her mother and Dana aside as well. "If you guys could go figure out which park to have the picnic in first, we will let you know when to bring the other kids by the cemetery. I think we need to see how it goes first."

"Are you sure that we should not take Jude as well, Stefanie? It might be better to give just Callie time alone before Jude comes in. He has adjusted so well and this visit may not help him the same way."

"Ordinarily, I would say let's ask him, but Jude sort of opened this topic last night when he was looking at a picture of his mother. He thought he needed to hide it from us. So, think it would be best if the four of us went to show both kids that we are not trying to replace their birth mother. However, if I see signs that Callie needs to be alone, I will call one of you to come get Jude."

Jesus, Mariana, and Brandon were already sitting in the van and becoming impatient. Jesus decided to hurry things along by climbing to the front of the car and honking the horn. He received glares from all five adults, but did accomplish his purpose as everyone got in a car.

Callie started to put her headphones in, but Lena stopped her. "Cals, we really need to talk a little before we get there. I will give you a choice of talking now or at eleven when we will be about halfway there. I know that you need to process some…"

Callie stuck her ear buds in her ears and closed her eyes. She opened her eyes moments later when her music stopped. Lena held up her IPod as she stuck it in her purse. "I was choosing to talk later, I just didn't want to interrupt you while you were talking."

"That was not the way to go about it and you know better, Callie. Mom and I know this is a hard day for you and we are doing our best to make it go as well as possible. I don't think I need to remind you that you are still in trouble with us from this morning."

"Okay…" Callie answered with a little bit of attitude before she caught herself and cleared her throat. "Mama, may I listen to my music for the first half and then talk when we get closer? I am needing a little time and space to think right now."

Lena fished the IPod back out of her purse. "Of course, Callie." Lena handed the IPod back to her daughter. "Thank you for asking so nicely."

Once Callie was back lost in her music Jude decided to speak. "I was really little when my m- when Colleen died. I don't really remember her very well. Do you think that's okay?"

"Of course it is, Jude. It is also okay for you to ask Callie to tell you stories sometimes to help you remember your mother. We also don't mind if you still call her your mom. She also loved you very much and wanted to take care of you."

"Callie always said not to get attached to anyone other than her until this house. Your house, or I guess our house, is different. Do you think my mom would be okay with me loving you guys like I would love her if she were here?"

"Jude, we adopted you because we love you as our son. Any mom would be happy to know that their little boy was being cared for and loved that way when they could no longer do it. If something were to happen to me where I couldn't be with you, I know that Mom would do an excellent job loving all of you for me. I wouldn't mind." Lena looked back at Jude to make sure that he understood and saw an odd look on his face. "Oh, Baby, just so you know, I am not planning to leave you anytime soon… Are you scared about going to the cemetery today?"

Jude took a little bit to look at Lena. "No, Mama, not really scared exactly. I sort of know what cemeteries are like. I know how to deal with things because of Mom and Grandpa Frank." Jude looked at Stef to make sure that he did not make her upset and decided to continue when she looked fine. "Mom talks out loud to him sometimes. Is that what I am supposed to do today?"

Lena and Stef instantly came to the same conclusion. No one in the six years since Colleen Jacobs died had ever helped Jude or Callie process this loss. This could be critical step is really making these kids part of their family. With a quick look, it was determined to thread lightly.

Before Lena could speak, Stef decided this was a question she could field. "I didn't know that you heard me talking out loud to my dad, Buddy. You are right, though, I do it. When I miss him, I like to go off by myself and talk to him. It doesn't even have to be anywhere special. Everyone does things a little different, though. If you don't want to talk to your mom out loud, you do not have to. You could talk in your head, write a note, or just sit and think if you want."

Jude nodded. "Sometimes when I see you walk off, I follow you like the night I thought you might leave us. I wasn't meaning to listen, really, I just wanted to make sure you were okay. The first time I didn't understand, but Mari told me that you were talking to Grandpa Frank. Since then, I just like hearing what you talk to him about."

Stef knew that she had felt someone close by during many of those conversations. She wondered how many of her kids had seen her and was a little embarrassed. Stef also hoped that she had not said anything too personal in any of those discussions. Lena sensed her wife's discomfort and took the conversation back. "How about next time you follow Mom, you go and sit with her? I bet that she would love to have you hold her hand or put your arm around her more than having you sneak around."

"I kind of thought she wanted to be alone." Jude asked sort of confused. "Would it be okay if I did that sometimes, Mom?"

"Of course, Little Man. He was your grandpa and you could talk to him, too, if you wanted." Stef was a little relieved that Lena had suggested that because at least she would know when Jude was there. "Sometimes, though, I might just want to be alone. Is that okay also, Bud?"

"Yeah." Jude looked at the time and saw that it was close to eleven. "Mama, may I have a piece of paper and a pen? I would like to write a note to my mom to leave there today."

Lena handed him paper, a pen, and her cell phone with ear buds. "How about if you listen to some music on my phone for the rest of the trip while we talk to Callie for a little while? Sound good?"

"Sure, Mama. Thanks."

"For what, Jude?"

"For just being my mama. You guys know that we love both of you, right?" Jude seemed to assure them before putting in the ear buds.

"Of course, Buddy." Lena said patting his knee a little before turning to her daughter. Lena just looked the girl for a moment before reaching out to squeeze her knee a little. Callie looked up with calm eyes and removed her ear buds.

"I guess it is eleven now, Mama?"

"Yep, it is time for us to have a conversation. Jude's using my phone so he will not be listening. It is just you, me, and Mom here, Baby. Now, I was very pleased that you already followed through apologizing to my daddy. From that, Mom and I know you are making progress. When you first moved it, you continuously said you were sorry for things you could not change. Now, you are trying to make things right when you could have done better."

Callie acknowledged Lena's words with a small smile. "But you still want to talk more, so go ahead. I am listening."

"You are right, Baby, I do have more to talk to you about right now. We have never taken you to the cemetery before. I was not even sure this is what you wanted. Grandma suggested it and we all are headed that way now, but what do you think?"

"No one has ever offered to take us to visit her grave before. I did go there once on my own just to see for myself, but it has been a long time ago. I didn't ask you because the only time I asked someone to take me there, it didn't end well. No one wants to hear a foster kid talk about their dead mother."

"I guess that makes us different from the others then. We always want to know."

"Maybe I didn't really know I wanted to go there until Grandma gave me the flowers. Then it seemed right."

"Well, Sweets, when we get there, do you want us to come with you or do you want it just be you and Jude or maybe just you? What are you thinking?" Stef asked.

"Where will the others be?"

"We asked them to go figure out the spot for the picnic before they came. You will have some time alone if you need it."

"I hadn't really thought about it much. Maybe Mama could go with me and then you could follow with Jude in a few minutes? Would that be okay, Mom? I love you, too, but I just want my mama."

Stef and Lena shared a secret smile. "More than okay, Baby. Mama would love to go with you. Jude is writing a letter to leave if that is something you are interested in doing as well?"

Callie looked confused. "I wasn't planning on leaving a letter, but maybe. Is that what I am supposed to do? I thought you just talked out loud to your dad…."

"Do all of my kids know about that?" Stef asked not really angry, but annoyed.

"Stef, everyone knows you do that. It is a fine way to grieve and everyone is okay with it. Right, Cals?"

"Right. Honestly, I thought that is what everyone did. No one ever showed me how to deal with any of these feelings before you guys. Are there other ways?"

Lena turned around to smile at Callie. "There are as many ways to grieve as there are people. Mom talks out loud, but Jude preferred to write. You could sit and think, you could just talk about memories. We can cry together. To become a healthier person, Callie, you need to do something. We want you to always remember your mother, but you also need to let some stuff go. Just whatever you think would help you the best."

"Today, I just want to go there and see the gravestone and lay the flowers down. I want you with me to make me know that I am not alone. Jude needs to be there and I want Mom there to make him feel safe. Maybe the others could come next time?"

"So, there will be a next time, Bug?"

"I think so. Is that okay with you guys?"

"Of course. Anything you need, Sweets." Stef pulled in at the cemetery.

Jude started to hand Lena's phone back to her. "How about you just keep that for now, Bud? Right now, Callie and I are going to head that way. You and Mom can come in a few minutes. Is that okay?"

He gave her a half smile. "Sure. I am not quite finished yet anyway." Lena smiled back and started to walk away. "Mama?" She turned back to him. "Make sure that my sister feels how much we all love her, okay?"

"I will, Bud." Lena put her arm around Callie's shoulder as they headed to the right spot.

A few minutes after they left Jude took out his ear buds. "Hey, Mom, I am done writing now. Do you want to hear what I wrote?"

"I would love to hear whatever you want to say, Jude. If you want it to be private, though, that would also be okay with me."

"You share your thoughts about Grandpa Frank with me, so I want to share these with you." Stef nodded to give him the go ahead. "Dear Mom, I don't remember you very well, but I know that you loved me. I still have the picture of you holding me and I am going to get it framed so I can see it every day.

"Callie and I have a new family. It took six years, but I finally got adopted. I have a mom, a mama, two new brothers, and a new sister. I think you would like all of them. Now it isn't just Callie and me that are a packaged deal, we all are.

"I like to read, but I hate math. Callie told me that you liked to read. She says that you read to us every night when we were little. I didn't know that I liked to read until recently, but it is something we have to common.

"Mom and Mama say that it is okay to love them like I loved you. I hope that you think that is true. I still miss you, but I can see them every day. Mom is teaching me to play basketball and Mama tucks me in at night even though I am getting too old. They both give me lots of hugs and kisses because they love me, too.

"I miss you, Mom. Love, Jude Jacobs Adams Foster"

Stef looked over at her little boy with tears in her eyes. "That was beautiful, Buddy. Are you ready to go find Callie and Mama?"

Jude nodded and folded his paper into little sections. Jude and Stef started off the same direction as Lena and Callie had earlier. Stef put her arm around him and he leaned in close. It wasn't a far walk to find Lena and Callie. Callie was wiping away a few tears and still held the flowers. Jude rushed up to hug his sister and Stef put her arms around Lena. Callie took Jude's folded up letter and stuck it into the bouquet. She let Jude help her lay down the flowers before turning back to her moms. Stef opened up her arms and Callie slipped in and held on tight.

"I am sorry." Callie said quietly.

Stef looked down at her daughter and gave her a quick kiss. "Are you talking to me, Sweets?"

"Yes. I am very sorry, Mom. I was disrespectful to you this morning. I apologized, but I didn't mean it. I love you so much."

"I love you, too, Callie Bug. Are you guys about ready for the picnic?"

Callie slipped one hand into Stef's and the other into Jude's as a response. Jude grabbed Lena's hand with his free one. Together they walked to the car.