Ugh I'm sorry there were so many errors here I'm resubmitting this chapter. I apologize majorly! *bowbowbow*
I do not own kingdom hearts!
Roxas' face fell, eyes widening in shock, not even bothering to tug the blanket more securely over his shoulders before he remembered how to breathe. No.. No... Please... "AXEL!" Dropping back to the ground beside him quickly, emotion came rushing back. NO! NO it wasn't fair! Take him instead! Not Axel! Don't take Axel! Though.. wait a second... wiping the tears from his eyes to lean down next to him, half glaring at the woman who was supposedly a doctor. "Fucking idiot! He doesn't have a heart! He's breathing get your ass in gear!" Of course he would be snappy... though the pain of leaning Axel lost his heart after all that... after it all going to waste... he felt like a moron...
Shaking her head as the teenager fell to the floor. "I'm sorry about your loss, but you should calm down." Trying to keep her voice calm. And when she heard him saying he doesn't have heart and he's life, she almost wanted to scoff. That was an impossible feat! No one could be alive without a heart. "Sir, thats impossible. You can't live without a heart, it's a well know fact." But even as she said this, she did look at the naked chest and put one of her clean hands onto it. 'HOLY SHIT!' The boy was right all along! But he couldn't be alive could he? "Well... I don't quite know what to say about this... He's breathing?" Now it was the females turn to be in total shock.
Roxas almost wanted to smack the woman around, hovering over Axel protectively as she put her hand on his chest and gave her idiotic diagnosis. "He won't be for very long if you just sit there!" Didn't have the respect or time for this woman to sit there and explain to her why Axel didn't have a heart beat. But other than that... Roxas was bottling things up again... holding things in... He didn't want to have a heart, why didn't Axel ask him before he pulled this? Were they together or not...?
She frowned and motioned to the two men who had just put Sora onto the truck, and were bringing over a gurney to Axel. "This one's still kicking! We need them to get to emergency room stat! They'll both need surgery asap!" Directing the orders to the men as they pulled him onto the gurney.
"What's your relation to the two?" Asking the blonde before she'd allow him onto the medical van.
Really, why wouldn't they have gotten Leon's truck again? This lady was clueless... Though supposed that the question was almost professional sounding. "Sora, the brunette, he's my brother while Axel..." looking away slightly, the first thing coming to mind was I don't know anymore... "He's my boyfriend."
Giving Roxas a disgusted look as she told him to climb into the back with the others while she herself went to the drivers seat, whilst one of the male nurse's joined Roxas inside and began to hook both of the male's up to drips. The other nurse shut the door and followed the woman, who started the ambulance and began to race down the streets.
Axel mean while gave a lurch as they hit a bump in the road, and his eyes fluttered open. Why was everything so blurry? "Ugh..."
Yeah yeah, thanks for being a bitch see if I don't report you. Half glaring at the woman's tone but did as she said, climbing into the truck and instantly going to Axel's side, taking his hand. Was this what it was like for him? For Axel when he...? When Aqua... Glancing over at Sora's still face and looking almost distressed He has a family now... He'd have to get them to call Riku... Jumping out of his skin the moment he heard Axel's small complaint, as quiet as it was, bottling up any uncertainty, but making sure to throw hope in there as well as he pet the older male's face with barely his fingertips. "You're alright... I'm right here Axel I got you..."
Quiet tears trickled down his face, he still couldn't see quite right. Why did Roxas follow him? Of all people Roxas came with him. "Why are you here?" Whispering in a monotone voice,
Why? Flinching back as if he had been struck by the words hard right across the face, Roxas put his head down as he lapsed into silence. "I... I love you... Is that not reason enough?" I have nothing here, and yet you dare try to leave me alone on this world? I said I didn't care if you hated me, but I'm not watching you die! More to store into the bottle...
"I love you too..."
Sighing and blinked a couple of times, finally his vision was clearing up. "But... How could you? After everything I've done." Even though there was no emotion behind it, there was a small trace of sadness.
Because I'm the idiot here. Too far gone to hold myself up... Bottle was starting to get really full... "What? Now I have to have a written reason to feel for you?" Roxas faked sarcasm as he squeezed the hand lightly, barely applying pressure as if he felt the man would break under him. "And you haven't done anything wrong Axel... Besides not talk to me." A smile, purely forced and not even covering his entire face. Even though you cheated on me before my eyes than tried pulling it off as asking advice... Even though you left me time and time again, pushed me away... Could almost feel the sides of the bottle cracking in his mind but it wouldn't stop there... no...
Looking away at this. He wasn't telling him the whole truth. "I'm sorry. I love you but we need to sort things out... You seem to not be able to trust me, and that hurts."
Sighing deeply.
Blinking at Axel once more as if he was the one being accused of lying, of cheating, of doing the pushing away, of making decisions for the both of them without asking. "I trust you... Now stop talking, save your strength, we'll be there soon..." Running his thumb gently over the larger hand, wiping at his eyes with the heel of his hand. Tired... he should've stayed in bed... none of this would've happened... but Sora... would Sora have died? Was that why Axel wanted to know where he lived! Was that why he was going to be late after work? Everything was starting to make sense... why would Axel keep him in the dark about this?
Taking Roxas' hand in his and bringing it to his face and nuzzling it. "If I had of known that he had a family... I wouldn't have done this..." He took a deep breath and began to tell him the truth. "I'm sorry, but ever since I found out that you lost your heart... I thought you'd no longer love me, it scared me. I had to get you back I was willing to do anything... I asked Demyx for advice and asked him to look after you whilst I would be gone. I didn't want you knowing 'cous I know you'd try stop me." Sighing a bit before continuing. "And when I went to you know... Sora- Sora told me about his family. He has a daughter..." Tears flowing down his cheeks. "And that's when I regretted the whole thing... I'm such a bad person!" He wailed.
"You need to stop talking…please…" Roxas muttered at first, though fell silent as Axel went on explaining. So… he thought… did he trust him so little that… did he think that he… "I do…" Barely a quiet whisper. He loved him, he told him… tried to convince him, begged, pleaded… and nothing he did would convince him… "The heart wasn't forcing me to love you Ax… I did that on my own..." Whimpering quietly after Axel finished and told him of Sora's family, looking over at the out cold brunette and trying not to cry. Sora… he had grown up… though glancing down as Axel started crying shaking his head and putting his hand on the side of his face. "Axel… Axel I'm sure he understands…"
"He won't forgive me... You should have seen his face..." Curling up into a ball and looked at his knees. "But... You understand right? Why I did this?" Why was it so bloody difficult to explain things now? And why didn't Roxas understand why? He was so confused. Why was he caring so much for him? His self esteem and gone from one hundred to zero within the hour. Almost depressed.
"Axel! No your chest!" Roxas freaked out completely as Axel sat up and curled into a ball, fear lacing into his voice, panicked. "I understand! I do completely! Please lay down you need to get inside the hospital! Listen we're almost there!" No, he's going to hurt himself more... he's going... Nearly falling forward on the red-head as the car stopped the a sudden jerk.
As the ambulance came to a sudden hault the man who was also in their with them, rushed over to put Axel back into the position he was in. So he wouldn't lose anymore blood, but to him he found it strange that the blood had stopped pumping out around three minutes ago. "Keep the wound elevated, we don't need him losing anymore blood than he has too." Instructing the blonde teen.
Axel managed to pass out again when he curled into ball. "Oh, your brother. Does he have anyone we could ring?"
Behind them the door had opened and he wheeled out Sora whilst the other took hold of Axel.
Looking almost completely lost as the stranger put Axel back in the position he was before, nodding to him sheepishly. Though he did wonder why they didn't strap him down like they had Sora... The question barely registered at first, eyes watching as they wheeled Axel away and towards the doors. "Um... yeah, Riku, he works here most the time." He remembered a hell of a lot more names of people Sora held close, but didn't think they'd take Axel's side of the story before jumping to conclusions... he barely had that chance with Riku but...
The two men pushed Axel and Sora though two double doors to head down for emergency surgery.
"Ah ah ahhh!" Putting her arm out to stop Roxas following them. "I'm afraid you'll have to stay here. I'll need to question you about what has happened. If you could sit down on the bench so I can take notes that would be great." Pointing at the wooden bench and she sat down hold a clipboard. "So do you have any questions before we start?"
Ah finally a sit down! Riku circled up on the sofa and was watching the television. The show was a bit different that the normal. It was about a guy that was an alchemist of some sort. It must have been late into the series because it was on about past events, something about his mother or something like that.
It was alright, but there was nothing else on TV.
He had already laid out the plates for dinner for when Sora came back, and dressed himself in a lilac shirt and black trousers. The ring, well the ring was safe inside his trousers.
The phone had began to ring. Riku frowned. 'Who could it be?' Not recognizing the number but answered it. Hesitatingly saying down the phone. "Hello?"
"Good evening is that Riku?"
"Yes... Who's speaking?"
"Oh this Radiant Garden General Hospital. I'm afraid to say there's been an accident involving Sora and-"
Not hearing the rest of the conversation as he clicked off the phone in panic. 'NO!'
Roxas looked almost traumatized as the woman held him back from following either of them, separated from them both and only able to watch as they disappeared. Was this how Axel felt? This fear? Yes he had questions, a hell of a lot but none of them the woman could answer on her own... "Yeah... Is Kiko working?" No... she's probably at home with her family right now... blissfully unaware of anything that had happened... Sitting almost heavily on the bench and instantly pulling his knees up, head on them so he wouldn't have to look at this woman. Like he could answer any of her questions anyway... Catching the date written on the clipboard and almost freezing before sighing. Oh... well happy birthday.
Shaking her head at the known name. "It's her day off today." Pausing as she readied her pen. "So do you want to tell me what happened? How did they end up like this?"
"Oh..." As much as he didn't like the woman... it would've been nice to have someone there to help him... but no, everything went stored away into that little glass bottle in the back of his mind. Head still on his knees, the blonde shook his head as she asked what happened. "I-I got there when it was over. I don't know. Heartless maybe..." He didn't want to get Axel in trouble. Have you ever killed anyone before? That's why he asked it... Why hadn't he started picking him the signs...?
Nodding in understanding as she had written the causes. "Makes plenty of sense. There number has dropped recently, but of course there would be a few still lurking around."
Putting her pen down and getting up, "Would you like to go in the waiting area? Or is there anyone else I can get in contact for you?"
Nodding silently to her as she confirmed his lie to be a possibility, not saying anything at first as she asked if there was someone she could call for him though stood slowly to go to the waiting room. It'd be warmer in the very least... "I have no one else." There was Demyx... but hell no. Not after tonight. Axel cheated... he lied to me... There was no taking back what he saw...
The silver haired male was sitting down in the waiting room, his face in his hands and utterly distressed. 'How could this of happened?' Why was no one telling him anything? He was sent here after arriving in the hallway asking what the hell was going on. What had happened to Sora? Who had hurt him? Or what?
Moving into the waiting room seemed like the hardest thing ever, but no where near as hard as seeing Riku there, the little half asleep girl at his side, her head against his side and drifting back off to sleep, in her hands clutching the book her other daddy always read to her, of course she didn't understand the situation in the least... Roxas bit at his lip before moving to sit opposite them, stopping halfway. Well... he should say something... right? Couldn't believe how hard it was to move over to Riku and put a hand on his shoulder for only a brief moment. A blessing, if you will.
Looking up to see the familiar face. "Roxas?" He frowned, remembering not so long ago he stopped at his door step not so long ago.
"What are you doing here?"
Roxas bit at his lip as Riku asked the question he was hoping he wouldn't, shaking his head before sitting opposite him. "Axel... did something stupid..." glancing at the little girl and shaking his head again. Not with her here. She didn't need to know what happened to him... So instead stood up again almost shakily before motioning for Riku to come to the other side of the room so he could explain. He didn't want to. He wanted to seal it away and never speak of it again, let it hurt only himself... but he had a right to know.
Looking to Destiny then back to Roxas. He didn't want to leave her on her own... But five minutes would be okay, right? She was asleep so she'll fine.
Nodding as he got up to follow Roxas in the corner of the empty room.
How to explain it without being murdered on the spot? Biting his lip as Riku followed him, the blonde running at his forehead and frowning once hit by a dizzy wave. Cold was back... "Ax-he... um.. Thought that I wanted my heart back after losing it again... so he's the one... but once he figured Sora and you had..." He wasn't good with talking so glanced at the little girl instead. "He freaked... tried to sacrifice his own heart but you know that doesn't work so I... If it was up to me it never would've... I'm sorry..." fading off by the end and staring at the ground instead of looking at the older male.
Gritting his teeth "Are you tell me that Axel has something to do with this?" Clenching his fists to stop himself from punching the blonde.
He also promised Sora he wouldn't do anymore fighting ever since getting their little girl. They wanted to raise her in a world with no violence.
"What. Did. He. Do!" Punctuating all his words.
Staring at the ground like a child being scolded for doing something wrong in school. Damn it... Riku wasn't going to like this... "He... attacked Sora for his heart. But I gave it back!" Just told, in a way, that for a few moments Sora had in fact died. Fully expecting the older teen to attack any moment, though wasn't going to fight back or protect himself.
Looking at Roxas in pure shock. No...No… NO!
"No..." Dropping to his knees in front of his boyfriend's other. "H-he told me something was wrong Axel; he said he saw it in his eyes." Axel attacked Sora... And he wasn't there to protect him! He knew of been there! He could have stopped it from happened. "I should have stopped him; I could have stopped this from happening!" A few tears trickled down his cheeks.
"Why did Axel do this?" He shouted.
The shouting must have woken his daughter from the amount of noise he was making.
So Sora knew before hand? How come he didn't pick it up? Hesitating after watching Riku collapse onto the ground, Roxas followed after him, sitting on his knees and putting an hand on his shoulder. "Riku, there was nothing you could've done. Blame me, I was the one who started the fight with Axel." Though instantly flinched back as the man screamed at him, shocked by the tears going down his face. Was that... was that how he was supposed to be reacting? No... He couldn't... "I don't know why... I'm sorry... he's fine now, he'll be fine." Please let him be alright... he had to pull through... Sora was too stubborn to do otherwise...
"No yell daddy, no yell." His screaming had woken up little Destiny, who was still lying on her side on the bench, book clutched against her chest. "Daddy said no sah face, so daddy no sah face."
Riku automatically softened at the voice of his daughter, and smiled as he walked over to her and slid her to his lap. "Shh, it's okay. Daddy's not sad, see? I'm happy." Smiling at her. She really did make him happy. "Hey, Roxas? Wanna say hello to your niece?" Talking to him softly now. It wasn't his fault after all, just his crazy boyfriends.
"No sah?" Destiny looked up at Riku as she was tugged into his lap, still holding onto the book for dear life. Though as he confirmed he was in fact happy she grinned up at him, though fidgeting in place, she was only four and did get impatient easily. "When daddy come out? Wan go home!"
Roxas looked almost stunned as Riku offered actual family rights to the little girl and to them though shook his head. "I have a cold, I don't want to get her sick." Offering a small smile instead.
Nodding to Roxas in understanding and when back to his child, his face fell slightly. "I know sweetie I want to go home too. Hopefully in a minute we can go see him. And when he gets out I can daddy a big surprise." Fumbling in his coat pocked and brought out a small black box, opening it he show her a silver white band with the inscriptions on the inside which read. 'Darkness will never take over our hearts.'
"You think daddy will like it?" Smiling at the little girl who was clinging onto the book. Sora gave her the book to her when they first got her, and she carried it around with her all the time after that.
Roxas had ended up sitting directly opposite of Riku and Destiny, the little girl blinking at the box in her father's hand as her expression brightened. "Pre pre!" Obviously trying to say pretty, she was just too young for most the words in the normal vocabulary. Nodding almost violently as he asked if he would like it. The blonde barely had to glance at the box to understand what it was, raising an eyebrow at Riku. Sora was the same age as him... It wasn't too early? At seventeen? Riku was probably planning this for his birthday... things would've been so much different if he had just walked away without a word... Let that night happen all over again though in twice the pain...
Petting her hair softly. "Yeah that's what I thought." Chuckling softly. Catching Roxas' looking and sighed. "You're thinking we're too young, aren't you?" It was something they heard time over and over again.
Riku was almost cradling her as if she was the most valued thing in the whole universe.
While cradled like that in Riku's arms, and it being a long time after her bed time, Destiny almost quickly fell asleep, even without having been read to a second time. Roxas simply shrugged at Riku's question, as if still trying to go over it, "I mean, it's your choice, you guys have been together so long I'm surprised you haven't asked sooner." Offering a smile and staring towards the door while trying to suppress a shiver. Of course he wasn't wearing the thermal blanket given to him that was back in the medical van. What was taking so long...?
Smiling down at Destiny as soon as she fell asleep. "Yeah... I was waiting for the right time." They waited in silence a little longer before a young man in his thirties with short wavy raven hair entered the waiting room. "Thank you for waiting, I'm Dr. Aido, I was the one who preformed both of your partners operation. And I'm pleased to say they both went swimmingly. But... They both did lose a lot of blood, and we almost did lose them both. Fortunately enough we matched their samples to our data base and found a donated supply quickly. They'll be waking up in under half an hour. Would you like to see them now?" Smiling rather proud of himself.
Okay... who was this guy and what the hell was he trying to tell him? Looking at this... Aido (which made him think faintly of his cat) like he was insane before catching what he said. Both had lost a lot of blood... almost did lose them both... Roxas' face fell almost to the point he wanted to collapse to the ground, but didn't. Instead giving a stiff nod as he asked if they would want to see them. Would... Axel want to see him? Why are you here? That question nearly broke his will.
Riku gripped his seat when he heard he almost lost Sora but relaxed to hear everything went okay. Nodding slowly. "Yeah, I do..." Standing up whilst cradling his daughter close to his chest.
"What about you Mr...?" Aido asked Roxas.
Roxas hesitated a moment longer than Riku before nodding, "Yeah..." Were they just going to fight again? Please... no more fighting it was all just getting old.
Smiling cheerfully, unlike the other two. "Okay, we we've paired the two in the same room. So the ward is just down the hall." Opening the door for them and started leading them down the hall. Soon enough they came across a door with the number written 1413.
Leaving them to it and instructing them if they needed anything or any help to contact the woman at the front desk.
Riku was the first to open the door, hesitating at first of course. The first thing he saw was Sora carefully led out on one of the beds, pale and ill looking. The same went for Axel. His normally pale skin even more whiter, the rings around his eyes darker than ever.
Was that a good idea? Blinking as the doctor said he put them in the same room, frowning at it slightly before shaking it off. Riku and Sora didn't need to hear the two of them fighting... but... Following more slowly after the others, casting one look at Sora before frowning, though looking almost panicked at the sight of Axel, freezing in place before going to his bedside and sitting beside him, instantly reaching for his hand but freezing. Did... he want him here...? Telling himself not to be a retard, that if Axel woke up, told him he was hated, he would turn and leave, no questions asked. Taking the hand lightly, barely applying any pressure, looking simply exhausted as he rubbed at his forehead. Sora was almost the same, though he was a source to be worried over more. He hadn't woken up since he was stabbed...
It must have been some sick joke! Someone had plugged Axel into a heart monitor. And obviously the line was running flat! But who ever did this was 'kind' enough to turn off the volume so the flat and on going 'beep' would be heard. They had also put him onto oxygen, the cylinder was to the side of the heart monitor and so was the drip.
It was the same situation for Sora expect his heart monitor was alive and kicking.
Axel's breathing was shallow, maybe it wasn't any good for him to be back in the hospital and only just coming out last time from been operated on!
Riku had tucked his daughter into the last bed, before going to his boyfriends side begging him to wake up.
Sora wasn't moving. Even with Riku begging as such he hadn't so much as twitched anything as little as a finger. Wake up? Didn't want to. But.. wait a minute why was he warm? Why was he breathing? And why the hell was Riku talking to him? Wasn't he dead? Noooo... hurt too much to be dead. Hang on, stories lie! There was no white light! More of a blue and red blinking one-oh... hospital? But... how did he... why did he...? Eyes too heavy to open... couldn't understand what Riku was saying...Though his hand finally did move, fingers twitching as if subconsciously looking for something to hold onto.
Roxas brought the freezing cold hands to his lips, kissing it lightly as he looked over the pale face. "Come on... Please wake up..." For someone who didn't utter that word once while living in the organization, he had said it countless times that night. Axel didn't have to lose his heart... he should've remembered how the hearts worked back in the organization. You couldn't just give them away to person to person. They had to be yours. Had to be your somebody's... So all that... went to waste... He could've kept it...
Gasping as he saw Sora's twitching fingers, and instantly taking both in his hands. "Come on Sora, wake up! I know you can! Two eyes? Or am I asking for to much? One eye then?" Asking hopefully.
Axel was still unresponsive as ever...
Again with telling him to wake up! It was Riku's voice though... and he sounded worried... was Destiny alright? One eye! But Riku I can't wink! "That... really hurt..." Dragging out the word 'really' for a few seconds, doing as Riku asked and opening both of his eyes, returning the grip on the hand weakly. He hurt all over still, faking a smile so no one would know.
Roxas glanced over at the curtain separating the two beds as he heard Sora's weak voice, instantly letting his shoulders relax. He's okay... he still had him to return to if Axel didn't... "Please Axel... you promised you wouldn't leave, don't break it now... I need you." Even though he was trembling in place and exhausted, he wouldn't let himself relax or lay down... not until he knew Axel was going to be okay...
Riku finally relaxed as soon as Sora woke up, even if he was groggy and his speech was weak. He was awake. "Hey babe, how you feeling?" Kissing his forehead.
Bringing his hand to his and interlinking them.
Axel was finally start to stir, his hand twitching then sending vibrations up his arm and soon enough his eyes were starting to flicker open
Egh. He had a headache from hell! On a more important note where was he?
Sora shut his eyes as Riku kissed at his forehead, struggling to open them again and look over to him. Struggle to do everything. "Still in one piece." Making an honest attempt for things to go back to normal, though he hurt...
Roxas flinched back as he noticed Axel starting to wake up, unsure he should be sitting so close, still holding on when he had the choice to turn and run away right in front of him. But he wouldn't... not unless Axel told him to leave... "Hey... how you feeling?" Faking a smile as the eyes opened, grasping the hand in both of his, trying to control his shaking...
Smiling back as stroking Sora's hand, of course he could see the pain hidden in his eyes. But maybe asking him now... No. Yes? Maybe? "Sora, you had me so worried when you didn't come back home. I had everything ready for your birthday too. But I'm so happy your okay." His other hand going into his coat pocket.
"I got you something... I dunno if you'll like it or not."
Looking up slowly and staring into Roxas eyes. "Hey." Saying it weakly at first. "You came." Trying to smile but failing. Damn why was it so hard? Oh yeah... That's why. He got rid of his own heart as a sacrifice to be with Roxas again.
"Sorry, sorry..." Sora sighed slightly as Riku scolded him for not coming home. "I know I promised... But hey, I thought you promised we wouldn't do anything for it!" Even blushing faintly as Riku said he got him something, though he was too tired, and too plain out of it to care about trying to hide it. "Riku..." Whining slightly at it as his only complaint. Jeeze, if they fought about anything it was going overboard on birthdays and anniversaries.
Roxas did manage to smile as Axel spoke to him, feeling relief as he said 'you came' instead of 'why are you here?' "Of course I came." lifting up the older male's hand gently and nuzzling his face into it lightly, making sure to keep it far away from his forehead as possible, though his entire face was warm. "I love you... How could you ever think I wouldn't come?" Only blinking once he realized what he had done. He hadn't meant to say that out loud! But the bottle was full, and starting to break.
Blushing slightly. As he brought out the black box, but hiding it from Sora's view. "I was waiting for the right moment to give this to you. I was meant to give it to you tonight at after dinner. But obvious that never happened." A light pause to calm himself down after rushing the last sentence. Bringing the box into view and opening it so the ring was on display. "Sora, I love you. Will you do the honor of marrying me?"
Sliding his hand around the back of Roxas' head and cupping it. "I thought after what I did. You wouldn't want me around anymore."
Where was Riku going with this...? Blinking at the little black box in his lover's hand before freezing. Oh god... no no oh god no! Walls crashed down as the question he thought would never be asked was, hand covering his mouth to keep from crying out as he nodded quickly and violently, thinking he was stuck for words but obviously wasn't as he reached out and put his hand on the side of Riku's face, a tear sliding down his. "Y-Yes..."
Hanging his head as Axel's hand left his to go around the back of his head, shaking it lightly and trying to keep from crying out or running away. Both seemed like good options. "I do... I told you... I don't want to leave you... You can do whatever you want to me, I'll still love you..." Let Axel use him, abuse him. He'd still care...
At first Riku's face paled at Sora's shocked expression, and started to think he took things way to far. Damn why wasn't he saying anything? But his spirits were lifted soon enough as Sora said yes. Now smiling down at his fiancé, and bent down to kiss him and at the same time putting the ring onto his finger.
Shaking his head as he used his other hand to cup the other cheek. "I'll always love you. I may do stupid things, but I'll always love you. I thought by doing... Well you know." Putting Roxas' hand over where his beating heart used to be. "Things would be able to go back to how they use to be. That heart was nothing but trouble to me. And I don't need that when I have you to replace that gap." Remembering now how to smile.
Was he dreaming? Sora was too weak to return the kiss to a full extent, too tired to move his body to help put the ring on, felt like a dead man waiting to get into hell, but at the same time he had never been truly happier... well unless you counted adopting Destiny, it was pretty up there. "But really? In a hospital?" Sora grinned up at him as the kiss was broken, moving his hand equipped with ring to hold onto the slightly older male's hand.
He was quiet through Axel's entire explanation, looking up at him only when he said 'how things used to be'. Was he getting things wrong that badly? He was trying to act like he was before... Guess he couldn't do it well enough to appease his boyfriend... He almost missed the last few words, though blushed faintly when he realized what he said. Returning the smile as he bent down to press his lips to the side of his head. "I'll try harder, everything will go back. I'm sorry... To ever make you think you needed to go do this."
Blushing lightly and scratched his head. "I couldn't wait any longer."
Shaking his head and smiled more.
"I like you the way you are. I like us how we are." His fingers massaging the back of Roxas' head. "I should apologies for everything I've done wrong to upset you."
Sora laughed weakly as Riku blushed and said he couldn't wait anymore, thought turned his head away so he could cough into his arm, both actions sent waves of pain which killed whatever good mood he was in before. "Ow... Oh... where's Destiny? She okay?" Surely he didn't leave her home alone...
Roxas went into melt mode as the hand rubbed the back of his head, allowing himself to relax enough to curl up in the chair and lay his head on the arm rest. "You don't have to apologize... you didn't do anything." Liar, liar, you just don't want him to hurt anymore. Things back to how they were meant he bottled every little tiny thing up and went around with a fake smile.
Stroking his patterns forehead "She's okay, she's on the bed next to you, sleeping." Smirking lightly. "You didn't think I'd leave her alone, did you?"
Pouting a bit "But I should! I've hurt you too much!" It's funny how the redhead had started to notice these things more without a heart. Maybe without it, he was able to think clearly.
"She is?" Blinking at Riku before trying to look around, though Sora was barely able to incline his neck enough to actually see. Though he was easily falling back asleep with his lover's hand working on his forehead, Roxas wasn't the only one cat like. "No! I just, okay a little." Laughing almost nervously as he finished speaking.
Roxas shook his head again as Axel fought with him, halfway tempted to say 'I'm used to it after all the shit you've done to me' or 'whatever happened to pushing me away like you normally would?' "It's fine Axel, really." Hiding his face in the arm of the chair as he felt the familiar sting. Fuck... not now!
Smirking at his little 'cat' so he nicknamed him. "You're tired, aren't you?" Petting at his brunette spiky hair.
Axel's smile faded. "I just want to make you happy..." Obviously saddened. He did so much to try to make Roxas happy, yet his boyfriend couldn't see it.
"Maybe." Sora smiled up at Riku, dragging out the word sarcastically though it was obvious he was. "Can you call up Leon? Tell him I never got to check out the castle?"
Roxas kept his head down for a moment, forcing everything to go away before looking back up at Axel and lowering his gaze again. "I-I am, was... It's more... complicated than that..." Should he tell? Would that explain everything? "I have chronic depression. So really, you haven't done a thing to hurt me, it's just that my... my mind takes every thing and twists it... so everything does..." barely whispering it, his head down and staring at the bed instead of at his lover.
Nodding quietly and stood up to kiss his forehead. "I'll be back in a second." Taking this as his leave. Giving him a quick look before waving to him.
Axel shot up but clutching his chest as he did so. "Roxas? Why didn't you tell me?" His face paled, if he had depression then that means that'll explain everything! Reaching to him and taking his hands.
"Kay... thank you..." He hadn't meant right then, but whatever. It gave him a chance to doze off without feeling guilty about it... Though the loud voice coming from opposite the curtain made the brunette huff, looking over at it and scowling. "Guys, sleeping four year old."
Roxas bit at his lip as Axel shot up, instantly throwing his thoughts aside and moving again in the chair, less relaxed and slipping one hand out of Axel's grasp and putting it on his shoulder. "Down, you'll hurt yourself." Blinking at the voice before forcing his voice to sound not as stressed. "Sorry Sora, my fault." false happiness going away as he glanced back at Axel and lowered his eyes. "I didn't... want you to treat me differently..." Or call me a freak... or abandon me the moment I said I loved you...
Axel nodded as he led back down, but as he heard Sora's voice he froze. Wait... What? He was alive? How! His body froze for a moment. Oh of course Roxas must of given it back... So much of a plan then.
Relaxing slightly before leaning over and embracing his boyfriend... Well at least he hoped he still was. "Roxas I'll never treat you any different. You're still the same person I fell for." Smiling slightly.
"Axel, your chest!" Roxas complained as his boyfriend hugged him, remaining stiff in his arms for a moment before his eyes widened at his words, arms going around him quickly but making sure not too tightly. Making the stupid mistake of putting his inflamed forehead against his neck. Running not a good idea, running in the rain even worse of an idea, add that to being overly stressed and losing his heart twice in two days and you had instant illness. His hair was even still wet. "Guess... we both need to talk more..."
As soon as Roxas' forehead fell onto his shoulder he almost shot away from the shock. "Roxs! You're sick!" Cupping his forehead in worry and ignoring what Roxas said, yet he is head he answered. 'Yeah we do...'
Uh... no shit? Why did this surprise him so much? Frowning slightly as he was pulled away from, only to shut his eyes as the hand went on his forehead. "And you were just operated on. Lay down."
Trying to look not shocked at the news that he had just been operated on again. But it was still there. "When was the last time you took your tablets?" Maybe if he took some more he'd get better?
Roxas huffed as Axel refused to do as he asked and shook his head instead. "Yesterday, when they were given to me. Kiko didn't give me more than that dosage... Really, please can you lie down?" He was starting to look more panicked by the moment.
Huffing as he lay down, and rolled to the side so he was able to still look at Roxas. "So... Change of subject... Are we- you know... Still?" Hesitating slightly out of nervousness.
Are we you know still? WHAT? Blinking out of confusion and even going as far to tilt his head to the side. Did he mean... together...? Huffing before moving almost too suddenly, connecting their lips together quickly and drawing back. "Does that answer it?"
Blinking first before his body felt much warmer. He nodded and returned the kiss. "Yeah, it does." Smiling gently and taking his hand and swinging it side to side. "You going to stay tonight?" Hoping he'd stay the night... Or was he asking for too much?
A second later Riku came back into the room, ignoring both Roxas and his fiery boyfriend. He knew he'd have to have words with Axel later...
Smiling gently as Axel confirmed he thought of the right question and came with the right answer, curling himself back up in the not to comfortable chair and blinking at his question, letting the older male swing his arm to-and-fro. "Course I was going to. I'm not going to leave you here on your own..." That... and I don't know how to get home from here. Blinking in confusion as he heard the door open, twisting around the side of the chair to see who it was and giving Riku a small smile, as if saying it was alright. Sora though, out cold once more, though this time fast asleep.
Smiling lightly as he stopped swinging Roxas' arm. "You don't look comfy in that chair." Pushing back some of the covers that showed off his hospital gown and some space. "Wanna join me? I'll warm you up too."
Riku sighed at the lightly snoring figure and smiled. Cute, of course he'd never say it out loud. Sitting back down on the not so comfy chair and watched his fiancé sleep, thinking how lucky he was to have someone like Sora in his life.
"I don't want to hurt you though..." Frowning at Axel's request to have them share a bed yet again, though he hit the nail on the head as he pointed out Roxas was cold. Well duh, he sacrificed his shirt for a blood rag. God damn... Once again trying not to actually touch his boyfriend as he slid in the small bed, shivering as he did so.
Allowing Roxas to climb in beside him and covering the both of them. Slowly bringing his heated arm around his shirtless lover. "You seem to like losing your shirts, don't you?" He laughed softly whilst breathing his strawberry scented hair. Was it too early to be joking around?
Roxas huffed as the arm went around him and Axel joked, trying to smile at it. "Well it was either that, or let you bleed to death. Sorry, I'll pay for them." Hinting in his own way that there was no chance he could go to school now, not with the expenses coming in. Yeah... too early for him to joke around, he was just staring blankly at the bed, feeling Axel holding him but... so far away at the same time...
Cuddling up to the cool teen and letting him steal whatever body heat he needed. "Nah, don't you worry about that. That's my job. You just concentrate on getting yourself into a good school." Yeah it was too early to be joking around, he could tell by the tone his blonde lover had used.
God damn Axel your chest... About to snap at him to get back so he didn't hurt himself, Roxas simply bit his tongue in silence. Ok... he did want the heat... Allowing himself to relax next to his lover, even to the point that he shifted to his head was back under Axel's chin, where he felt safe... "But... we barely make enough as it is... And I only have a year left."
That's it. Axel sigh rather contently as his blonde went back to his favorite spot under his chin.
"As much as that sounds like great news to me. I couldn't let you do that. You're at that age where your grades mean so much to you. It'll be the thing that gets you a proper job." Petting his fringe as he spoke.
Sighing heavily as Axel argued with him over it, Roxas let his eyes fall as the warmer fingers passed over his forehead, purring quietly at the contact. "But... I want to feel like I'm helping... not just depending on you all the time... Besides... I'm seventeen... it's legal now to at least have a part time." Yep. Happy fucking birthday. What he get? He got to witness his boyfriend kiss his friend and another hospital trip. Oh, and let's add almost lost everything close to him to the list.
The redhead sighed as he moved to pet at his cheek. "Okay you win, but please promise me you'll get into school too." He didn't want to hold Roxas back, and end up like Lea.
Axel froze. Seventeen? Wait! Didn't he say he was sixteen like a few weeks ago? "Seventeen?" Why didn't he tell him?
"When was it?" Muttering softly.
Smiling a little as he realized he won the battle, Roxas nodded weakly, nuzzling his head into Axel's neck. "I will." Though froze as Axel questioned his age, sighing quietly and moving to shift his arm over Axel's waist, barely applying pressure. "Um... today... Doesn't matter. Day's almost over anyway..."
Shit. That meant he totally ruined Roxas' birthday! He'd have to make it up to him somehow. In an instant Axel fell silent in guiltiness, and soon enough asleep.
Biting his lip as Axel fell into silence, taking his breathing as an indication that the red-head fell asleep and shifting his arm off of him, moving out of the bed as quietly as he could without tugging on the sheets or jostling him, pulling it back up around Axel's broad shoulder. Wiping his eyes once standing and making sure his face was calm before moving around the curtain, looking over the fast asleep Sora and Riku. Was he awake or not? "He alright?" Asked quietly just in case.
Jumping slightly at the voice and asking groggily. "Sw-or-aa? That ewu?" Still rather sleep as he spoke. Rubbing his sleepily eyes and opening them to realize who it was. "Oh, Roxas. You okay?" Waking up slowly.
Biting his cheek to keep from laughing as Riku woke up, shit hadn't meant to wake him up. "Sorry, just wanted to check in on you guys." Offering a smile but let it fade. "I'm... sorry for the trouble we've caused." If I had just kept my damn mouth shut...
Shaking his head and smiled. "It's okay, I would have woken up anyway. I'm on a chair." Getting back into a sitting position, his back was rather stiff. "Sorry? Oh... Yeah. Thank you." Biting down his lip. Well this was uncomfortable, wanting to change the subject he smiled. "I ask Sora and he said yes." Motioning to the exposed ring.
Lip twitching in amusement as Riku claimed he was uncomfortable on the chair, scratching the back of his head sheepishly. "Yeah... they tend to be." Wow it was really awkward talking to this guy. Though at one point in time they were at each other's throats... At the news of their engagement he tried to smile at them, relaxing slightly. "That's great! Knew he would though," Sora's feelings for Riku were strong... maybe stronger then his and Axel's...
Laughing quietly. "Yeah, I was hoping he'd say yes. It'll be good for Destiny too, we'll be able to be her real dads." Looking over to his daughter.
"She's four now. We've had her for about two and a half months." Answering any questions Roxas would have. "She's a good kid." Smiling lovingly at her.
Destiny... cute name... Did they name her after the islands or something else? Now he had to force on a smile as he changed the subject to his child. "That's good... You get some sleep." Offering a smile as he retreated quickly. What do you think about kids? I mean we could like...adopt... It wouldn't be fair to do that to a kid now... neither of them had hearts, neither of them could actually care for it... Roxas debated for a moment climbing back in the bed... but Axel looked too comfortable to move... so just curled himself back up in the chair, letting out a week cough of pain, and set himself on watching the older male sleep. He wouldn't... how could he? It was well into the early morning hours before he did finally fall asleep in the chair.
"Okay. Night Roxas."
Nodding as he swung his legs over the arms of the chair and falling back to sleep again, and quite easily.
By the time morning came he was out like a light, cold in full force after sleeping all night without a blanket or shirt in the cold room, being wet last night didn't help either. Dried tears from his much worse nightmares were still on his face, though he was still curled up in the uncomfortable chair, head on the armrest and somehow managing to curl on it. Sometime during the night Roxas had grabbed Axel's hand, even still he was clinging onto it.
Riku woke up half an hour earlier to get Destiny some breakfast, as it was past nine now. Coming back into their ward with his 'shocked' daughter. He told her when she was eating her food that 'daddy had an accident'. First looking over to his right and seeing that Roxas was up. "Let's go and say hello to uncle Roxas. Yeah?" Whispering it because he didn't want to wake up the other two.
Looking up at her father as he said to go and visit the stranger, looking almost shy by the strange request. "Uncle...?" The term was unknown to her, though she followed her dad anyway, or more of tugged excitedly on his hand only to pout a little, Roxas wasn't awake, in fact the very opposite. "Sweepy daddy, Roro sweepy. Why sah face?" She didn't know how to whisper...
Looking confusingly at the girl at the name 'Roro.' Oh Roxas.
"Hey Roxas. You alright?" Sitting down on the chair opposite.
"Rough night?"
"Hrm?" Grumbling quietly as the two started talking to him, trying to get him to wake up. Didn't want to he just fucking fell asleep! Wiping at his face with the heel of his hand before blinking up at Riku, only to look away and start coughing. "Yeah..." Both questions answered with that one word, though only one part was a lie. He was cold... freezing actually but burning at the same time. His throat felt like someone had thrown a lit match down it...
Pausing for a bit to realize how tired the blonde was. "You want to go in the spare bed?" Asking quietly. "I'm going to take Dest home for a bit... You want to come with me? Or you do you rather want to sleep?"
Taking off his jacket and offering it to the shivering teen.
Shaking his head slowly at both of Riku's offers, rubbing at one of is eyes though pushing himself up so he was sitting. "No... I should stay... thanks though." If I can prove it to Axel I won't leave... will he stop casting me away? That's what he was hoping at least... Blinking in confusion as the jacket was offered to him, reaching up to take it but drawing his hand back slightly. "You don't need it?"
Smiling as he threw the jacket over Roxas' shoulders. "You need it more than me, dude." Picking up his daughter before he exited. "Oh." He turned around. "If Sora wakes up, can you tell him I've taken Destiny home? And I'll be back at lunch time." Holding the door open with his foot.
Blinking up at Riku as the warm coat went around him, he was so small the thing nearly engulfed him. "Yeah, I will." Smiling up at him as Destiny waved good bye but followed behind her father, still clutching that book to her chest. "Bye, bye daddy! Bye, bye Roro!" No idea how to talk quietly... though she was trying...
Axel who had prior woke up when he heard the little girl yell at Roxas and her other father. "Roro? Can I call that?" Yawning yet smirking.
Roxas jumped almost a foot in the air as he heard Axel's voice, letting out a quiet sigh of relief as he pulled Riku's coat closer around him, trying to quell his shivering. "What do you think?" As sarcastic as he could manage, though softened up after a moment, trying to hide the obvious signs of his illness. "You alright?"
Frowning slightly as he realized Roxas was wearing a leather jacket.' Who is it's?' 'More importantly when did Roxas jump out of the bed?' Doesn't he want to be near me anymore?' These were the questions that popped into his mind, yet afraid to say them out loud. And he started to believe his thoughts.
"Yeah, I'm fine." Trying to put on a cheerful face.
It was rather 'funny' Axel was starting to miss his heart now. All he felt now was darkness and sadness.
He caught the look of confusion before the fake mask of happiness came back, blushing faintly and looking at the bed, "Riku's. I was cold..." Was he trying to pull the 'is he cheating on me' thing on him! The hell, he had no right! Not after what he did! Nodding slightly as he said he was fine, curling back up in the chair and putting his head on the arm rest, offering a hand to the older male almost timidly.
Frowning again and crossed his arms. "I never asked you whose it was." But softened up quickly to take Roxas' cold hand and bringing it to his face and nuzzling into it.
"You're cold... Why did you leave the bed?"
Yet this time using a monotone.
Biting his lip in silence as Axel's tone set him off again. Was it that much an issue really? It was just a jacket... Why did he leave the bed...? "I... I wasn't tired and you fell asleep... I went to check on Sora. Came back and you took over my spot. Didn't want to wake you." Smiling weakly at him, only managing to look exhausted... how long was he asleep? Couldn't have fallen asleep later than five in the morning... and the chair kept him awake with how hard it was...
Nodding gently and whispered. "How is he...? Sora; how is he?" Even now he regretted everything he had done. And no matter what he'd do... He'd never be able to take it back. It cut him up at the thought.
Axel felt like shit, knowing he's ruined two families. Sora's and most importantly Roxas. A single tear drop ran down his tattoo.
Sighing slightly at the tears running down Axel's face, shifting out of the chair to sit on the edge of the bed, leaning over his boyfriend and kissing his forehead. "Don't start that. He's fine. He's not angry in the least." Or... he hadn't seemed it... In fact knowing Sora he was too excited about being engaged to remember being attacked to begin with...
As Roxas sat onto the bed and kissed him he sighed. Leaning forward he wrapped two arms around the slender waist. "I'm sorry. For everything I've done wrong. I just- feel so... I don't know." Sighing weakly as he stroked at his boyfriends boney knee.
"Demyx... I'm sorry about that. I guess I should explain myself."
"It's alright..." Laying down after a moment and putting his own arm over Axel's side gently. Biting his lip as Axel started talking, though only looked shocked as he said he should explain himself with Demyx. So he was actually going to tell him why he felt he wasn't good enough for him? That he needed two people to fawn all over him in order to be happy? Hell, why stop at two? Who was to know where he went when he said he was going to 'work'.
Taking Roxas' hand in his own before making the confession. "Okay... I'll admit this to you. Before you joined The Organization... I did have 'feelings' for him. But nothing did happen. And what you saw last night was nothing. It meant nothing. It was only on the cheek." Trying to keep calm and his speech slowed, but at the end he bit his bottom lip as if he was waiting for his blonde lover to strike him.
Man why was this so difficult? Was he afraid? No... He couldn't be that would be ridicules. Relaxing his jaw afterward and reached for Roxas' hand carefully and slowly. "I feel nothing for him!" Axel confessed.
He had promised himself if he ever learned this he wouldn't be upset, wouldn't get angry... No... This was more like betrayed. "So was I a replacement for you?" He hadn't meant to say it out loud... but the bottle was filling up faster than ever. Did he ever feel for just me? Was it because I reminded him of Demyx? If that meant nothing why did he do it? Couldn't fuck one so went for the younger one who believed him when he said he loved him?
Frowning hard at the teen. "No! It was barely anything. It was more like a... Moment if you will. But I swear I only see him as a brother! And nothing more. I only have eyes for you." Crossing his arms and muttered. "This why I didn't want to tell you. Because I knew how you would react..." Pouting lightly at the end in a pissed off fashion.
Just in the moment huh? Well what if he was horny just in the moment and decided to... Glancing up and catching the expression on Axel's face, trying to keep from flinching away from it. "How... How else do you expect me to react?" Snapping it without meaning to, head staring at the floor to hide the tears rising up. "You just want me to be happy about all that and throw what I saw you do aside? How can I trust you?" He would've gone on, but he started coughing, bending over and shuddering with each intake of breath.
Looking quite stunned at the crying teen. Shit, no... Tenderly he reached out his hand and putting it onto his back. "Roxas... That was a long time ago. Way before I even met you."
Trying to control the anger in him but it was failing, like his boyfriend his own bottle was full to the brim and about to explode.
"You think I don't love you, is that what this is about? I got rid of my OWN heart to be with you! Is that not enough?" Getting up suddenly and ripping off the heart monitor (This wasn't actually doing anything but laughing in his face) tugging along the IV along with him as he limped towards the window, gazing out side to stare at the grey murky clouds. "I could have died for all you cared..." Muttering to himself as a single tear drop fell down.
Run... Run... Run... The thought echoing in his head as Axel snapped at him, letting out a weak sob though tried to control it. "You didn't have to though! None of this had to happen!" Not looking at anything but the ground, hearing the bed moving before he realized what happened and got up quickly, panicked. "Ax, lay down! Please you'll hurt yourself!" Moving hurt, the room wouldn't stop spinning, though he reached out to Axel's hand, tugging on it to go back to the bed, only to falter at his words. "If... that was true than why... Why the hell do you think I...?" Chased after you, clung to you and cried out my heart... screamed out your name... "Don't think that way." Tried to sound stern... only managed betrayed... "If you were to die you asshole I'd follow you. Why is it so hard for you to understand? I need you!"
Damn he was crying. Turning around suddenly to pull him into a hug, not caring about the throbbing pain in his chest. Cupping his head and waist and cooed. "I hurt you... I'm sorry. I don't expect you to forgive me. But I've got off what was on my chest."
Silently his own tear drops fell down as he rocked his lover gently, as if he would break any moment.
Almost jumping back as Axel turned around so suddenly, expecting completely to be struck though stood in complete confusion as he was embraced. Hesitating a moment before returning the embrace and shaking his head lightly into his neck. "I-It's ok... I do..." Breath shaking as tears still worked down his face but had to force himself to stop, to tug away from Axel just slightly. "Your chest lay down... I'll go find someone to put the IVs back in..." Didn't want to step away completely just yet... the embrace was warm... he was so cold...
Not wanting to let go of Roxas but did because he tugged away from him. Looking at him curiously before showing his hand, indicating it was still in there. "I took off the thing monitoring my... Heart." Giving him a weak smile as he leaned again the window.
Blinking at the wires still sticking out of Axel's wrist, tilting his head slightly. "But... I thought you..." Glancing back at the hooked up machines, nothing had changed. Damn he was loosing it. Shivering once before reaching for Axel's hand, "Come on, in bed with you." Only to jump in place as he heard Sora's weak voice complaining.
"You guys gotta be so loud? I mean come on... It's not noon yet..." His sleeping patterns were worse than Roxas' it seemed...
Nodding gently as he crawled back into the bed and made a promise with himself. No more fighting. It wasn't good for Roxas, and himself too. Asking carefully. "You gonna jump in too?" Or was this too much to ask for? A shiver went up his spine when he heard the brunettes voice. They put him in the same room as him!
"Sorry Sora... Oh, Riku took Destiny home, he'll be back later." Roxas relayed the message as he returned slowly to Axel's bedside, almost imagining how exhausted the brunette looked with his reply of "okie doke". At Axel's question he hesitated a moment before nodding, pulling the coat further around him as he sat down on the bed, not laying yet as he started coughing again. Please say the cold hadn't progressed to phenomena...
Pouting lightly as Roxas didn't lie down, but still he moved up and made room for the teen.
"Rox? Are you not feeling well?" Is he sick still...? 'Damn I should have kept more of an eye on him.'
Breathing raggedly for a minute before answering with one shake of his head, telling the truth at least. Slipping the coat from his shoulders and setting it on the chair for Riku when he got back before slipping into the bed beside the much warmer Axel, shuddering once. "It's okay though..."
Wrapping a single arm around his cold boyfriend's waist, and moving his hand up and down his back to warm him up. "Dad use to do this when I was cold and couldn't sleep."
Smiling gently.
It took him a couple of moments before he finally managed to relax, concentrating on Axel's warmth and the hand moving on his back. His Dad? He hadn't seemed that friendly... though it might just be aimed towards him... "... Sorry I... I shouldn't have snapped like that..." Roxas' voice was weak, resting his forehead against his boyfriend's shoulder lightly, curling up with the blanket over him in an attempt to stay warm.
Still moving his hand up and down and sighed gently. "It's okay Rox. You don't need to say sorry. I snapped at you too." Closing his eyes slowly as the motion of his hand started to wear him out. Yawning softly and started to drift off again.
Nodding his head weakly as Axel told him not to apologize, burying his head under his boyfriend's chin yet again as he finally started to drift off again, this time close to being comfortable and almost warm instead of freezing and in that horrible chair. Oh.. he should rush home and feed Aiko.. though surely she had made enough noise for Demyx to do it... Before he could even question it Axel petting his back had made him fall hard into sleep.f