My beloved Elaine,
I hope, you returned safe and sound to your school. My journey back home flew smoothly and I spent the rest of the weekend with my parents before I went back to St.Vincent's.
I am here again for just two days, but it already seems like eternity to me. And although it still takes a few days until my graduation, I write to you now because I want to make sure that my letter reaches you on time, before we see each other again.
When Neil told me yesterday evening that you´ll be here as well for our graduation next Sunday, my heart almoust jumped out of my chest. I need to confess that I had to control myself a lot to suppress my joy, in order not to make your brother suspicious. Probably he wouldn´t understand anyway, how happy he made me with this message.
I´m thinking of you the entire time and it´s difficult for me to concentrate on my daily obligations at school. Maybe because by now, they seem so useless and so ridiculous to me. I realize more and more, how right you have been in so many things and now I can see, how much these days with you gave me, what a gift I experienced with you. Not only that we have found our love for each other... however that was by far the most beautiful gift of all.
You are in my heart and I terribly miss you. I don´t know how I could spend even just one more day without you and I already count the hours until we see each other again. I pray that these days until Sunday will pass by quickly that I can finally hold you in my arms again.
Take care of yourself.
I love you,
Thomas W. Delahay
It was already late evening and as always, Delahay made his rounds through the corridors and classrooms after the house prefects had switched off the lights in the dormitories. Again, everything was business as usual. As usual, everyone protested in a loud voice before the lights got switched off and as usual, young Wharton kept on dilly-dallying around instead filling up the ewers quickly for some of his schoolmates and place them next to their beds.
Delahay sighed. He knew, he just needed to wait a couple of days more until he didn´t have to deal with all this anymore but to him, it still seemed to be eternity. Only now he realized how much all these small rituals started bothering him. The hue and cry of the prefects when being overstrained with their duties, the students not following their orders, this running back-and-forth all the time to make sure that everyone was sleeping or if there was someone who simply didn´t want to obey and secrectly sneaked out of the dormitory.
As Tommy Judd and Guy Bennett did for example. Delahay wasn´t able anymore to count the times, Barclay returned from his nocturnal inspections, holding two torches in his hands - his own and the one, he just had taken away from Tommy Judd. Delahay couldn´t remember either, how often his invidious schoolmate Fowler nagged him in a squeaky voice, reporting him that Guy Bennett was doing everything else but laying in his own bed and sleep. It didn´t matter, how often Delahay told Fowler: "As long as we don´t catch him red-handed, we can´t do anything.". No one could dissuade Fowler off his fixed idea to fulfill his duty as a house captain and putting Bennett into his place. When Fowler kept on snorting wildly after a unsuccessful discussion with the Gods, murmuring again and again: "I will get Bennett, one day I will get him.", Delahay always had to think of Mrs. Pearce´s dog, one of Mother´s neighbours, who came over for a visit every now and then. This furless trembling something with huge goggle-eyes was to be identified as a dog just by it´s squeaking and it´s notorious yapping ... and Delahay couldn´t help himself, but Fowler reminded him of this dog somehow.
"What a dumbhead ..." Delahay finally thought and wheezed easily while pulling the heavy wooden door behind himself into the lock, then he slowly walked along the corridor.
On the flip side, he knew that Fowler wasn´t so wrong with his statements. Delahay was aware of the fact that Guy Bennett used each imaginable situation to attract attention ... and he knew as well that Bennett had him in his hand with the secret, both were sharing. It turned out that he wasn´t the only one who was hiding something and Delahay was almost grateful, that Bennett decided to leave school voluntarily. He didn´t make a big fuss and kept the dirty little secrets for himself, at least those concerning Delahay.
After Bennett's disappearing, Delahay didn´t think that much anymore about what happened, but after these days together with Elaine, he started wondering if all what happened, if all what they have done to Guy Bennett was really legitimate and justified.
Again and again, Delahay thought about the lines he had written to Elaine this afternoon. The young man started wondering if Guy Bennett just wasn´t the embodiment of what he was keeping back from himself for such a long time. No doubt, Guy was different, often impudent and provocative with his behavior – but he was dreamy, he was a passionate person ... and at the end, he came out of the closet what everybody already knew but no one wanted to enunciate.
Delahay realized that Guy was already doing something, he hasn´t been able to until a short time ago: Guy lived ... and Guy loved, against all odds, against all conventions. Indeed, Guy Bennett loved men ... but what did this matter at the end? Anyhow, he wasn´t afraid of his own feelings, what has been notable on Guy's facial expression when he left school on his last day, his head held high, very much to Delahay's surprise.
After this, everything was business as usual, the small dirty secrets remained secret and after a while, it was as if Guy Bennett would never have existed at St.Vincent's ... but only now, Delahay realized that Guy Bennett had taught him a lesson in his own way. Everybody believed, they were the winners and Guy Bennett was the loser, the poor sod ... but it was exactly the other way around!
Would Delahay or Barclay or anyone else have ever dared to sabotage the military parade on purpose and lose the pot? No! Everybody would have been way too afraid of the fellow student´s reactions! Especially afraid of the punishment awaiting him, afraid of the disgrace to be the reason for the messed parade. Everybody was afraid - except Bennett! And how this lad got himself out of this affair! His coolness and his impertinence to blackmail the Gods with his dirty little secrets was the icing on the cake! Delahay still remembered the words yelling at him while Bennett grinned against him and Barclay, threatening them to go to Mr. Fargeson: "My God, I´ll thrash you myself!"
How furious he had been. If Barclay wouldn´t have held him back, the young man really would have lost control and beaten up this arrogant snob ... however, if this incident would happen today, Delahay wouldn´t want to beat up Guy Bennett anymore. Probably he would walk over to him, shake his hand and say: "Good Lord, you really have courage Bennett, I´ve got to hand it to you."
Indeed, Bennett had given Delahay a lesson, a lesson for life he just realized and started to understand. How stupid he has been, how blind he has been!
For the second time, Delahay thought about the lines he had written to Elaine this afternoon and he sighed lightly when he thought of what with he had experienced with her the last days. Elaine and Guy Bennett embodied both in their ways what Delahay didn´t want to see, didn´t want to hear, didn´t want to permit in his life so far ... and now, he was so overwhelmed by his feelings that he didn´t know how to interprete them.
For a split second, Delahay gazed out of the window at the patio and suddenly, it was as if he could see Guy Bennett in front of his inner eye, standing close to one of the windows, wearing his robe, his head leaned against the cool wood panelling. For a short moment, the young man stopped, not moving at all. Delahay still remembered watching Guy Bennett gazing at the patio, completely lost in his thoughts. He was almost surprised, how well he still could remember griping at him, what the hell he was doing here, walking past him with fast steps.
But only now, Delahay started asking himself what was keeping Guy Bennett awake this evening. What has been the reason been for this longing in his eyes, for this light sadness in his face? It was surely not because of him, Delahay was aware of this. But after all what happened, the young man now realized, what didn´t let Guy Bennett sleep this evening. It was the longing for the one he loved.
And wasn´t this something, Delahay now had in common with Guy Bennett? Couldn´t he find his sleep either because the longing for Elaine let his entire body hurt?
Delahay turned around the corner and stopped at the large bank of windows of the big studying room, having a good overview over the park. The young man gripped the doorknob, turned it round and opened one of the big windows. It wasn´t really cold, but the light breeze getting into the room made Delahay shivering. He closed his eyes and deeply inhaled the fresh air while his thoughts kept on leading him away from this place more and more.
He could see Elaine's face before his inner eye, her long hair falling gently over her shoulders and her tender skin gleaming lightly in the moonlight. Delahay sighed. He missed Elaine, he missed her like crazy and each fiber of his body and his soul yearned for her.
Where was she? Was she now in her school in North England, maybe in a dormitory as well? Was she awake as well, thinking of him? Would the wind carry his thoughts to Elaine and whisper into her ear in the voice of love? Would it tell her, how much Delahay loved Elaine and how much he missed her? Would it tell her, how much he needed her, how much he desired her?
Delahay put his hand on the bulge of his dark pin striped pants and he gasped when his hand slowly opened the zipper.
While he still kept his eyes closed, he imagined how he would lay in his bed in the dormitory. It would be dark, only the the moonlight would throw a weak ray of light through the window. Delahay would hear nothing else except the sleeping boys. His eyes would be closed and he would pretend to be asleep but he would be wide awake and together with Elaine in his thoughts, longing for her so much that it almost ripped him into pieces.
Delahay's hand slipped through the opened zipper and gently rubbed over the fabric of his underwear. His body started relaxing under his own caresses and Delahay moaned softly. But then, he hesitated for one moment and opened his eyes. Could he really do that? What if someone would find him here? What would happen then?
On the flip side, he wondered if Elaine would lay in her bed just in this moment, doing exactly the same he was doing now. The thought of Elaine stroking herself excited Delahay and he caught himself wishing to sit at her bed and watch her pleasing herself. No, he couldn´t hold it back any longer. This longing, this lust, this desire ... was simply too strong.
The young man closed his eyes again and his voice started panting lightly when his hand began to rub firmer over the fabric of his underwear while his other hand propping at the cool wall. Then, his fingers started sliding carefully under the waistband of his shorts and pulled them down slowly, now touching the tender skin of his manhood.
Suddenly, Delahay would open his eyes when hearing a familiar voice whispering. He would recognize Elaine's face in the moonlight, placing her finger on his lips, so gently, so beautiful. She would wear his plaid robe, which would be way too oversized for her and a seductive smile would play around her lips when Delahay would sit up and Elaine's hands folding back the blanket. His hands would firmly grip her hips when Elaine would mount him, her fingers fidgering with the waistband of his pyjamas.
Delahay's hand now started rubbing firmer over the skin of his manhood and with each passing second, the young man could feel his increasing arousal under his hand.
Elaine's and Delahay's lips would hungrily meet again and again and his hands would caress Elaine's breasts through the fabric of the robe. Her soft hair would gently fall over her shoulders and Delahay would groan lightly when his hands would strip the robe off Elaine's body, bringing her tender naked skin and her beautiful small breasts to light.
"Oh Thomas, I love you ..." Elaine's voice would whisper into his ear, panting lightly when Delahay's love sword would enter her and Elaine would start thrusting him slowly and deeply.
Again and again, their lips would meet, hungrily kissing each other, so longingly, so crazy of love. Elaine would press her lips on his while Delahay would try to suppress a loud moan and his arms would grip her just firmer while Elaine would thrust his love sword just deeper into her, her fingers clung into his hair.
Delahay clasped his manhood even more, moving lightly while massaging himself and in his thoughts, his lips would suck eagerly at Elaine's nipples while their rhythm of love would get deeper and faster.
Both would addict themselves more and more to the burning desire of their bodies and souls, searching, demanding, passionate.
"Oh Elaine..." Delahay panted aloud and burrowed his face in the sleeve of his jacket, in order to suppress his panting while his hand kept on rubbing more demanding and faster over his hardened manhood.
Then, Delahay would press his lips on Elaine´s and he would hold her body close when the enormous wave of her orgasm would make her body tremble. While they were kissing each other in his thoughts, Delahay bit into the sleeve of his jacket, suppressing his loud groan when he came, panting and sweating.
For a few seconds, the young man was not able to move. While he told Elaine in his thoughts, how much he loved her, his mind returned into the room little by little and he slowly realized what he had done. His gaze moved over to the corner before him and Delahay gasped when he noticed the shiny mark at the brickwork. That only could have been his work!
The entire thing had something good though. In his passion and his eagerness, he at least kept a good aiming ability and fired his powder into a corner and not across the entire room! On the other hand, nobody must see what had happened here. But running around with a bucket and a cleaning mop he couldn´t do now either. For sure, some of the students would wake up and then everybody would wonder, why Delahay was cleaning a wall in the middle of the night!
The young man dressed quickly, then he gripped the big potted palm standing on a small footstool and pulled it over into the corner, where Delahay had left his love juice.
Inside, he had to smile when he thought of Elaine. He wondered if she would approve what he just did. Maybe she would be annoyed ... but maybe, she would grin at him seductively and whisper into his ear, how much she was pleased about him making such good progress.
Delahay grinned broadly and kissed Elaine in his thoughts, then he left the room, switched off the lights and closed the door carefully.