Although Lewis made a point of getting to work early, but he still didn't get there before Hathaway. At least the office was relatively underpopulated in case they ended up shouting.
As soon as he entered their office, he felt the charged atmosphere. Nonetheless, he dove right in.
"Hathaway, man, you keep expecting the worst of me when it comes to women, even though you've only been right once."
Clenched teeth: "You ask me to be backup for you and then you go behind my back and do that."
"What?! I did nothing. We did nothing. It's all in your mind, James, man. You jumped to the wrong conclusion."
"You expect me to believe you were 'just sleeping'? You were both half-naked in the same bed. Her hands were all over you!" Hathaway glowered at him.
Lewis bit back the first six responses that popped into his head. "Aye, man, just sleeping. Very middle-aged, that." He added, shaking his head, "She just had her arm on me."
The vehemence and volume were tapering off, but Hathaway was not yet willing to back down.
"So that's enough for you, old man? 'Just sleeping' in the same bed with my mother?" His fingers drew the quotation marks in the air.
Though sorely tempted, Lewis refused to respond with anger. I should smack you for that, you cheeky sod. But I know this isn't easy for you.
They stared at each other a minute longer.
Finally, Lewis took a big breath and stepped back, his voice low. "Hathaway, is this going to be a problem between us? Honestly?" If I have to choose, you know you'll win.
Hathaway inhaled and then accepted the olive branch. "Honestly, I'm not sure I can get used to it." He considered a while. "Sorry about the 'old man' thing."
"Yeah, that was cheap. You owe me." When Hathaway didn't disagree, Lewis pushed his luck, grinning wickedly. "So how about telling me who you were with when I interrupted you?"
"Oh, no, Sir. That is not an even trade."
"You know I'll find out anyway. It's a small world here."
No answer.
"Carruthers."
James looked horrified. "Never!"
"Holland."
"She rejected me over a year ago."
"Martin."
Hathaway just looked disgusted and shook his head.
"Lindsay."
"Lindsay doesn't like men."
"Seriously? I didn't know that."
"Well, Sir, with all due respect, you can be pretty oblivious."
Lewis couldn't argue with that.
"Macklin."
"I wish. She won't give me the time of day."
"Blimey, Hathaway, I didn't realize how few choices there are here. And both of us competing for the same pool."
Hathaway rolled his eyes. "I wouldn't say that, Sir. Whatever it is you're doing, it can hardly be called 'competing.'"
"Hey!" But Lewis resumed his quest. "Is it someone in CID?"
"Nope."
"Ah. Traffic?"
"It's good your skill at detecting criminals is better than your skill at detecting good-looking, available women. There are none in Traffic."
"Ouch! Um . . . Vice?"
"I suppose you were bound to get it eventually. Not too many more divisions left."
Lewis ran through the female vice officers in his head.
"It's never Lizzy Haines!"
Hathaway broke into a smug smile.
"She must be a good ten years older than you!"
"So?"
Lewis looked reflective. "I could do her meself."
Hathaway stared. "You wouldn't!"
"No, I wouldn't, Hathaway. Just like I wouldn't do your mother unless I was certain you didn't mind, okay?"
Hathaway glared at first, then silently conceded the truth of what Lewis was saying, nodding his head. "Okay."
* * *