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Pain

Spencer closed the door and faced Kira who stood staring at him with tear-filled eyes. "I'm sorry," she whispered.

"Why are you apologizing?" Reid asked in surprise.

"I should've known," She whispered over her aching throat, her words hitching over her breathing. "I trusted him. Why didn't I see?"

She went to the couch, sat down, and began to cry. He stood where he was twisting his hands together because crying women freaked him out. What could he say to her that would make her feel better?

Just listen, were Emily's words of wisdom to him. She said that girls don't need a man to fix them. It went against the logic of his brain though.

Kira looked up at him and her misery went straight to his heart. She'd nearly died at the hands of a manic. If he had lost her, and the opportunity to find out where these wonderful new feelings could take him…

He went to the couch and sat next to her. He put a shaking arm around her shoulders and hugged her close. She curled into his arm and sobbed against his chest. "I was so afraid that I'd never see you again." She said.

"Me too," He said softly.

The slight scent of vanilla from her skin and hair tickled his nose. His palms tingled as his hands rubbed her arms. A voice that didn't have anything to do with Ian told him that he needed to get out of there. Instead, he used his right hand to lift her chin. He took off her glasses and set them on the coffee table.

"You have beautiful eyes." He said shyly.

"There's nothing special about me." She said, tears rolling down her face.

"That's not true. You're the bravest person I know." He brushed the tears from her face with his thumb.

"Spencer…"

He answered the unspoken request of her eyes by kissing her gently on the tip of her nose. She laughed and tangled her hands in his hair, pulling their faces together so that all they could see were each other's eyes.

"You have the most angelic face." She said. "I feel so safe with you."

He untangled from her hands and tried to stand but she gripped him tight. "Please don't go." She begged.

"I don't think that's a good idea." He resisted.

"Spencer please…"

He let her pull him back down into her arms. He kissed her mouth, tentatively, because he hadn't kissed anyone since Lila Archer. What if she didn't like it?

"Wow…" She said when they pulled away. "That was nice."

"Not as great as your other boyfriends." He frowned.

"I only kissed one other boy when I was sixteen. His name was Jamie and he was cute, but not as sweet as you." She said.

"No more talking," He said stroking her hair. "Remember what the doctor said."

"Then don't talk," she whispered.

She initiated a kiss that sent waves of tingles down his spine to his belly and all the way to his toes. He pushed his tongue tentatively against her teeth. She responded eagerly allowing him access that sent more tingles along his spine.

For the first time in his life, he wasn't thinking or trying to analyze the data gathered by his brain. He let his body do what it wanted to do and it was bliss.

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Kira took a couple of seconds to wonder if letting this happen with Spencer was right. This overwhelming feeling of intimacy frightened her to her toes, but he wouldn't hurt her like the others. He was sweet and kind, so she let her mind and body be conquered by a gentle hand.

Somehow, beyond her understanding of how it happened, their clothes ended up on the floor. His hands and fingers started a fire in her skin and belly. There was pain at their joining. She gasped around it and Spencer went still.

"Did I hurt you," He asked breathlessly.

"Shh… It's okay."

"I don't want to hurt you."

"I'm not complaining Spencer." She whispered ignoring the pain in her throat. "I want this. Don't spoil it."

His eyes suddenly changed. It happened so fast she almost didn't see. The color shifted from dark chocolate to black. "I was wrong about you. You're quite the wildcat." His silken tone carried an accent she'd never heard in his voice. "What you did to that Dr. Mount joy was a complete turn on."

"Spencer," she said uncertainly.

"Oh he's not here. He can't take big emotional swings. That's why you need me baby."

He kissed her hard devouring her mouth with a fevered intensity that was predatory.

"Stop it… Get off me." She tried to scream, but the pain in her throat hurt so badly tears sprang into her eyes.

"I told you to relax." Ian said with a wicked grin. "I promise you won't be sorry."

She struggled trying to push him off her body, feeling like she was back in Dr. Mount joy's office again. It was like time had turned in on itself. "Go away… I want Spencer. I hate you." She whispered dryly.

"Spencer doesn't know how to treat a lady." He slid his hands up and down her bare torso as she twisted under him.

"Please stop it…." She punched out with her hand catching him under the chin and knocking his teeth together.

He shouted in pain, rolling off her and the couch they lay on, hitting his head on the edge of her wooden coffee table. He was still as death while she lay sobbing, curled up like a badly frightened child.

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He opened his eyes to the sound of heartbroken sobbing. He scrambled to his feet and groaned around the pain that exploded from the back of his head. Kira lay curled up in the fetal position, naked and shivering. "Kira…"

She jerked away from his touch. "Go away." She groaned. "I don't want you. I want Spencer back."

"It's me… It's Spencer. I promise." He reached down to touch her hair, but she jerked away from him.

He pulled the blanket off the back of the couch and wrapped it around her. "Go away…"

He didn't want to leave, but she jerked away from him when he tried to touch her cheek. It hurt more than he thought possible that she refused to let him touch her after they'd had such a sweet time together.

Until Ian had ruined everything.

He hastily dressed in the clothes he'd scattered over the floor. He left his shirt un-tucked and his socks on the floor next to his shoes. He stood for a minute staring at her in the low light of one lamp shining in the corner of the room. She twitched and whimpered like a small child, which cut him to the core.

How much could a person take until they simply went away?

She rolled over to face the couch, not acknowledging his presence. He perched carefully on the edge of the couch to watch her. He reached out a hand and touched her calf. She didn't jerk away so he spoke softly to her.

"I told you I'd never leave you alone again and I meant what I said."

"Spencer?"

She opened her eyes and stared at him, her eyes filled with a deep mistrust that hurt more than he could ever imagine.

"I'm here…"

"Did you make him go away?" She croaked.

"Ian's gone… I promise."

"H-how c-can y-you p-promise h-he w-won't c-come o-out a-again?" She asked, stuttering over every other word. "I n-never w-want t-to s-see h-him a-again. H-he r-ruined e-everything."

"I know Kira. I'm sorry. I promise you I'm going to see someone that will make him go away."

Kira watched him for a very long time, as though she was trying to come to some kind of decision that would change the rest of her life. He waited, knowing that if he moved or spoke the spell would break and he might lose her forever.

She moved quickly jumping into his lap and his arms. She cried for so long he thought she must have used up all the tears she had left, but he let her cry without speaking. "I wanted it to be special." She choked.

"I know… I wanted the same thing. I should have said no. Our emotions were on the edge. I should've have let it get that far. I should have known Ian would take advantage."

"Hey," She looked at him through swollen red eyes. "You weren't alone. I was there too."

He forced a smile. "We should talk after we get some sleep. I'll stay on the couch."

"You don't have too. I don't mind if you stay in my room."

He stroked her hair and kissed the top of her head. "I don't think that's a good idea. Until I find away to control Ian for good, we can't be intimate again."

She nodded. "Alright… You're the profiler." She made a weak joke, but he laughed.

"I think I might be falling for you Ms. Reynolds, if that's okay with you."

She pretended to think about it for a while. "I think I feel just the same Supervisory Special Agent Dr. Reid."

"This should be fun." Reid quipped.

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When Reid opened his eyes to Kira's living room, it was with a big smile on his face. Her couch was much more comfortable then his lonely bed and he didn't have to work. Hotch had told him at the hospital that he could take as much time as he needed.

He looked over at the clock on Kira's DVR. It was just after seven in the morning. It felt earlier because the sun filtering into the room had a grey cast to the light. He sat up and stretched. His eyes flicked to his right and the hall that led to Kira's bedroom. He wondered if she was up. He decided to go see.

Her door was wide open, so he decided it would be okay for him to go inside and see if she were sleeping. Her bed was to his left. He smiled to see her laying there flat on her back, spread eagle. She snored a little, which he found very cute for some reason.

You're pathetic and you make me sick. You stand there like an idiot. She nearly brained us and we're still here.

I'm not listening to you anymore. You took advantage of a sweet girl that I care for. I'm tired of you messing up my life. I'm going to find away to make you go away for good.

You can't get rid of me Spencer. You haven't been listening to what I've been trying to tell you for years. I'm part of you.

Not for long…

Kira opened her eyes, and jerked away from Spencer with a yelp.

"I'm sorry… I shouldn't be in here." He backed away feeling heat race over his cheeks.

"Spencer?" She sat up and rubbed her eye with her fists like a little child.

"Yes."

"I'm sorry I'm a little out of it." She reached out for him so he went to sit of the edge of the bed.

"It's okay… How is your throat? You sound a little better."

She swallowed hard enough for him to hear the click in her throat. "It feels a little better. I think I'm just gravelly from sleeping."

"I know you just woke up, but I wanted to talk to you." He said picking at the edge of her blanket."

"How about you make the coffee and we'll talk. I need a shower to really wake up." She asked.

"Alright, I'll meet you in the kitchen.