Hello again folks! I have returned from my extended leave and can now waste more of my life giving you stupid reading entertainment, and to think, I get paid for this (what joy!!!). Lol, not really, I wish I did, I'd have so much freaking cash right now if I did, but enough of that, here is you're promised Zimminess, YEAH!!!

Episode 21: Dib's New Spectacles

There was loud bunch of ruckus coming from the depths of Zim's base. Dib ran furiously to try and get out. Dib soon came to a door which would lead him to an elevator that would lead him to the surface. Dib hurriedly pressed the open button on the control panel next to the door, but there was much delay in its opening.

"Come on!!!!" cried Dib. "Open up!! Please!!"

As Dib pounded on the door for it to open, he could hear Zim approaching quickly on his spider legs.

"Get back here Dib stink!!!" shouted Zim. "You honestly think you can break into the base of ZIM!!! And get away with it?" Soon after saying this, Zim heard Dib's voice come out of no where.

"I've been able to so far!!"

"SILENCE YOU…um…HEAD MEAT!!!"

Dib stopped his pounding only momentarily to question what the hell head meat could mean. During this brief pause, the door finally opened. Dib shook off the thought of the bad name calling and rushed inside, pressing the button to take him up.

"Alright!" said Dib with a bit of relief. "…NOW GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!"

The elevator zoomed up the shaft at record speeds. Infact, it was going SO fast that centrifugal force was forcing Dib to the floor of the elevator. However, as the elevator sped up the shaft, Zim walked into it (the shaft I mean).

"Curse you Dib!!! Curse YOUUUUUU!!" shouted Zim as he realized there was no way he could catch up with the elevator. "Grrr…hmmm…wait minuets…yes…YES!!! Ingenious!!!"

A new look had come on Zim's face as he pulled out a giant laser rocket thingy from his PAK and aimed it at the quickly ascending elevator.

"Take this you Earth pig!!" shouted Zim as he fired a huge round at Dib.

BEOOWWWW!!!

SPLOSION!!!

The explosion of the projectile forced the elevator out of the shaft and up ward faster, soon crashing through the roof of Zim's base.

"HAHAHA!!!" laughed Zim. "See ya, DIB!!!"

Inside the elevator, Dib was being thrown about like a sack of potatoes. By an odd coincidence, two miles down the street (not somewhere in china where they make potatoes), a sack of potatoes in a toy store was going down an escalator being thrown about like a Dib. Anyway, the elevator (not escalator, we're pass that now, forget it forever, you'll never see it again) flew across the sky. It soon began to descend, as it lost its momentum, into a tree line. The elevator crashed violently through an all manner of trees, rocks, and prairie dogs shish-cabobing large mouth bass (gee, this is one strange day). As it continued to crash, the elevator made an abrupt stop into a large tree. The force of the impact to the tree cause it to shake furiously and drop a single acorn. This acorn fell from the lowest branch and barley tapped the elevator, causing it to rupture and explode, sending Dib flying out from the back of the elevator and ramming face first into another tree, slightly cracking his glasses.

Zoom!!

Crash!!

Cooking!!

Acorn!!

BOOM!!!

Tumble!

"…ow…" moaned Dib as he tore himself off the tree he had had his face embedded in. Dib noticed his left lense was cracked and took off his glasses to examine them. "Darn it, I just replaced these things."

Dib's pouting soon stopped and he took another look at them.

"Well, it isn't too bad. I'm sure I cane buff this out." As Dib said those famous last words, another odd thing in this day of ever particularly odd events happened.

Seemingly out of no where, an inter-dimensional time and space rift appeared, sending a huge beam of light everywhere. From the rift, a large robot gopher looking creature emerged and soon caught sight of Dib. The beast walked menacingly over to Dib and snatched his glasses from his hand.

"RAGGERAGFFF!!!" it roared. The creature soon after his roaring broke Dib's glasses in half threw them on the ground and repeatedly began to stomp them. After the stomping was finished, the creature spat on the glasses and returned to the rift which made him disappear along with all the light and what not.

Dib stood there in aw, puzzling at the strange rift monster he had just seen.

"What the…how did that…who was…did I leave the…wait a minuet, MY GLASSES!!!"

Dib fell onto his knees and picked up the pummeled remains of his late glasses.

"You destroyed my glasses!! You damn darn dirty stinking gopher!!! You've got to be kidding me! Now how am I going to get back home, I'm practically blind!"

Dib sighed and swept up however much of his glasses that he could and put them in his coat pocket. He then got up and began to walk back home, bumping into trees, rocks, lamp posts, post men, men with hats, hats with ribbons, ribbons with packages, a large (literally) lead zeppelin ect…

It was a while before Dib got home, it being so hard for him to find his way being as blind as a baseball bat. Night had fallen by the time he ran into the electric defense grid in front of his house, which was active when he hit it.

ZAP!!

"OW!!" cried Dib. "This is freaking ridiculous!!"

Dib shock off the pain and found his way to the door, letting his partially charred body into the house. As he entered, Dib saw Gaz sitting on the couch watching TV.

"Uhg, do you know where Dad is?" asked Dib as he limped over to get a grasp on the couch. Gaz turned around and looked at her horrible injured brother and giggled.

"Ha, what happened to you?" she teased.

"Well," said Dib taking a stick out his hair. "I was…"

"That was rhetorical Dib, I already know what happened, I'm just laughing at you right now."

"Oh yeah? Then what happened to me?"

"Blasted out of Zim's base, landed in the woods, had your glasses destroyed by gopher, and you stumbled all the way here." Dib stared at Gaz in aw.

"What the…how did you know?"

"Staff entrance," said Gaz quickly.

"What?! But that doesn't…oh, ever mind."

"Dad's in the kitchen by the way."

Dib walked into the kitchen; and sure enough his father was there, making…um…stuff.

"Um…Dad," stuttered Dib, being afraid of his father's reaction to the breaking of another fresh pair of glasses. "I have a problem." Membrane slammed his hands down onto the kitchen counter and turned to Dib with much rage in his eyes.

"…and what problem might it be THIS time Dib?" said Membrane glaring. "Can't you see I'm BUSY!!!??" Dib quivered back in fear.

"Um…I uh…I uh…um…" stuttered Dib.

"Well come on now, I don't have all day, I have work I need to do!"

"…um…my glasses have a bit of a…how do I put this…malfunction," said Dib holding out the shards. Membrane examined the small pile held before him.

"Hmmm…well son," said Membrane, his mood changing almost instantly. "I'm afraid that your glasses are very much destroyed. You'll have to get new ones I'm afraid."

"Oh, no really? I never would have guessed that!" said Dib sarcastically. "But what do I do about it!?"

"Well, I would suggest you get new ones," said Membrane pulling a bundle of dollar bills out of his pocket and tossed them to Dib. "Here's some money."

Dib looked at the money and then back to his Dad, who had returned to working on whatever it was he was doing (I really don't know what he's doing, nor is it relevant, so I'm not going to describe it). Dib shrugged his shoulders and headed out the door, but not before bumping into some miscellaneous pieces of furniture.

Bump, bump, bump

Ow!

"Uhg…" moaned Dib as he walked down the dark city streets. "This is ridiculous, how am I suppose to find a place that'll sell me new glasses if I can't even see!?"

As Dib continued to fumble around in the dark, he didn't see that he was coming up on a cat that was sleeping in the middle of the side walk. Dib stepped on the cat's tail, causing the poor creature to jump up onto Dib's face and proceeded to claw at him.

REOW!!

SLASH SLISH SLASH!!

AHHHHH!!!!!!

"Ahh!! Get off of me you…Gyah!!" yelled Dib after ripping the cat off of his face and throwing it into a nearby dumpster. "Ha! How do you like that you crazy cat!!?"

As Dib rhetorically asked this, he didn't realize that the particular dumpster he had thrown the cat into was filled to the gunnels with even more growling, hissing, hungry felines.

The cats all crawled out, hissing and snarling. They looked to the cat which had just been thrown into the dumpster. As the main cat shook off the trauma from being tossed as he was, he took a quick glare at Dib and pointed at him, signaling to the other cats that he was the boy who was responsible. The other cats quickly turned their heads to be facing Dib and began to hiss and drool at the mouth.

All Dib could say throughout all of this was; "…huh oh…"

The main cat then gave off one final commanding hiss, sending the army of cats flying onto Dib.

HISS!

REOW!!

Slish slash!!!

AHHHHH!!!!

The cats continued to cause Dib an un-imaginable amount of pain, causing him to hurriedly back up into the nearest store in a vein attempt to get away.

"Ahhh!! Get off me!!!" Cried Dib, throwing a cat off as his back pushed the door behind him open, allowing him to walk further into the store.

As the cat's continued to scratch, a Chihuahua with a lobotomy walked up from behind the main desk and growled. As it growled, the cats all immediately stopped their mindless scratching and turned to the dog. Upon seeing the dog's growling and stitched up forehead of doom, the cats gave out a shriek of fear and all jumped off the torn up Dib and ran off into the night.

Dib looked at his tattered attire, covered in cuts and minor scratches, revealing small amounts of blood, and then looked to the dog; which had stopped growling and was now sitting down, smiling, and happily wagging his tail as he panted.

"…Ummm…thanks a lot Mr. Dog," said Dib as he began to walk over to the dog.

Dib was about to pat the dog on the head when a strange mist suddenly spiraled around the dog, hiding it from sight.

"'Don't mention it' he says," said the smoke as it traveled upward and became a long skinny smoke tunnel.

The smoke suddenly subsided and revealed an old oriental looking man, with a long thin white mustache, long white hair, and a long slick looking white coat now holding the dog and petting it.

"What the…?' said Dib startled and confused. "How did you…um…never mind."

"What is it that brings you to my humble shop young man?" asked the man.

"Well…" began Dib as he held out the bundle of money his Dad had given him. "I'm looking for a pair of glasses to replace my old pai…" Dib was cut off as the store owner swooped in, dropping the dog (who hit the floor with a squeak), and grabbed the bundle of money.

The old man counted the money, flipped pass his thumb, and then inhaled its scent deeply, giving off an exhale that showed he was REALLY relaxed. He then turned to Dib and gave off a big evil smile.

"I have just what you're looking for," said the man quickly as he jolted over to a shelf on the far wall of the shop.

He rummaged around the shelf for a bit until he found what he was looking for.

"Ahhh, this is it," he said, blowing dust off of an old small wooden box.

He then zipped over to Dib and held the box out in-front of Dib and slowly opened it.

"Behold," he said, revealing the boxes contents.

Dib looked in the box and saw a pair of golden decorative glasses. They were just in Dib's head size (so they were very big…)

Dib: "Hey!"

Store owner: "It's kinda true, it is fairly large."

Dib: "Now don't you get started!"

Me: "face it Dib, you're head is big, stop denying it."

Dib: "NEVER!!!!"

Me/ Store owner: "Fine, suit yourself."

Anyway; the glasses were just in Dib's size, and had hand carved symbols on the sides, as well as gold figure of an eye holding the lenses together. Dib shook off the clearly evident truth about his head delivered from the store owner and myself and looked on at the glasses.

"Wow, these are pretty neat, mind if I try them on?" said Dib looking to the store owner.

"Be my guest."

Dib took the glasses out of the box and put them on. As he looked through the lenses, things were still blurry and hard to make out.

"Dang it! I should have known these wouldn't…" but before Dib could finish his sentence, the glasses gave off a brief flash which semi-electrocuted Dib's eyes.

ZAP!!

OW!!

Dib quickly shook the pain of the shock off and un-squinted his eyes.

"Yeow, what in the world was tha…" Dib widen his eyes in amazement. He couldn't believe what he was seeing. He was…well…SEEING!! No blur no distorted physical vision. "Wah!! This is amazing!! These glasses adjust to the needs of the user!?"

"Yes," nodded the store owner. "But heed these words my boy…" Dib looked at the store owner wondering what he would have to heed.

"Those are no ORDINARY spectacles you are wearing they are magical spectacles, doted with great power by the beings in the heavens!!"

"Really? Cool!"

"But the powers within those glasses are more powerful then any can possibly imagine. Many a man has gone mad wearing those. Do not let the power with in them take you over, as those who came before you did!"

"…Um…I won't?" said Dib, not sure what to say.

Promise it boy!! Promise it on the dog!!!" exclaimed the owner, holding the dog by the head in Dib's face.

"I promise, I promise!!" yelled Dib, trying to get away from the dog in his face. "Now is that all!?"

The store owner dropped the Dog, zipped back to behind the main counter, and regained his composer.

"Yes that's it, do come again soon," he said with a smile.

Dib rolled his eyes and walked out the store, wearing his new glasses with pride. As he left the store and stepped into the moonlit street, he saw one of the rouge cats' jump for him.

"Reow!!!"

"Ahhh!" yelled Dib as it jumped.

As Dib screamed, and the cat flew towards him, the glasses began to glimmer and then shot a laser out of the lenses which fried the cat in mid air.

ZAP!!!

RAaaaa….*dead*

Dib looked at the smoking carcass of the dead feline and then touched the glasses.

"Wow, these things really ARE doted with power from the gods…COOL!!!"

Dib gave off a big smile and skipped down the road back to his house. But as he skipped, he didn't notice that the glasses were beginning to slowly grow around his head.

By the time Dib got home, the Glasses had grown almost all the way around the back of his head. Dib didn't really seem to notice this as he walked happily into the house. Upon entering; Dib saw Gaz exactly where he had left her, still watching the television.

"Gaz!" said Dib with a smile. "Check it out! Theses glasses are freaking amazing! They have magical pow…"

"And that's my Q to exit stage left," said Gaz upon hearing the word magical. She got up and walked up the stairs toward her room.

"No Gaz! I'm serious this time! Just check out these thin…" But before Dib could finish his sentence, Gaz went into her room and slammed the door shut. The sound of numerous locks shutting soon followed after word.

Dib stood at the bottom of the steps looking up in disappointment.

"…oh come on! I'm not that annoying…am I? …you know what, forget it, I'm going to bed." And with that, Dib ascended the stairs to his room.

As Dib finished brushing his teeth and changing into his night cloths, he crawled into bed and set the alarm for school.

"Well, today was an odd day, but I must say, I'm pretty happy with it. Time to hit the…hey, what the…" said Dib, as he tried to take his glasses off but couldn't. "These things won't come off!?"

Dib pushed and pulled as hard as he could until the glasses popped off of his head.

"Gyah, wow, these things fit too well," said Dib as he put the glasses on his night stand.

Dib jumped into bed and rolled over to face his glasses on the night stand.

"Good night glasses." And with that, Dib snored off to sleep.

As Dib snored peacefully into the night, the glasses began to twitch and move. Soon, the glasses stood on their hind end and began to walk over to Dib.

Dib awoke the next morning feeling better then usually. But how could he not? The sun was shining, the birds were chirping, and he had a great new pair of spectacles to look this perfect day in the eye and say 'bring it on world!!'.

"YAWN!!! Wow, what a great sleep that was," said Dib, throwing the blankets off and reaching for his glasses. "Hey, what the…"

Dib looked at the dresser and realized that the glasses were gone. He glanced around the room real quick like (WOOSH WOOSH WOOSH!!! That was quick) and soon realized that he could see perfectly fine. Dib's eyes filled with fear as he lifted his hand up to his face, to test if his scary suspicion was true. Sure enough, Dib felt the cold cast gold lining that was his new glasses, already on his face.

"What in the world are these things!?" exclaimed Dib

As Dib pondered furiously, with his heart beating with fear, he suddenly was pulled by his head out of his room, down the hall, and into the bathroom.

WAHHHH!!!

Woosh!

He flew into the bathroom, and the door slammed behind him. His head was then forcefully turned to face the mirror. In the glass, he saw the reflection of himself and the glasses.
"What's going on here!?" demanded Dib. Dib felt the back of his head. As his hand touched the back, he felt the cold gold bands of the glasses wrapping around the sides and top of his head, connecting at an intersection point. Dib grabbed the bands and tried to pull them off, but to no avail. The glasses shook his head around, throwing his arms off the bands; then two tentacles grew from the intersection point and quickly wrapped around his wrists and forced him down on to the sink counter.

"Gyah!! What do you want from me!!!!!" The lenses of the glasses then began to glow bright red. "Hey what is thi…no…NO…NOOOOO!!!!!!!"

As Dib screamed from inside the bathroom, Gaz stood outside the bathroom waiting impatiently for Dib to finish whatever it was he was doing.

"Hurry up Dib!" Shouted Gaz. "I don't have all day!" Gaz got a very strange reply.

"HELP ME GAZ!! HELP M…*SMACK*!!!!..."

The hall was silent. Gaz starred puzzlingly at the quiet bathroom.

"Dib…?" Suddenly, and without warning, the bathroom door was shot off by a huge red laser, flying past Gaz's head. Gaz looked into the smoke filled lavatory to see a pair of big glowing red circles. As the smoke cleared, she saw that it was her brother slightly levitating, looking on with a soulless look in his now all red lenses.

"…need…red…" Dib and the glasses then hovered out of the bathroom and down the stairs.

Gaz looked on at her brother's odd behavior, floating out of smoke filled bathroom and all with unusual head gear and glowing red eyes. She soon shrugged off the recent event and walked into the bathroom.

"Psh, finally." And with that, she slammed the door shut behind her.

"AHH!! Get off of me!! For the love of all that is good and something; GET OFF OF ME!!!!!" shouted Dib as he floated through his living room. Suddenly, and without warning, the glasses (well, it's kind of a near helmet right now, but that's not the point) zapped Dib's head like an electric chair strapped to his face.

Zappaapppaappp!!!!!!!

AHHHGbckalkca….!!!!......

The shock he received caused Dib's head to hang over limp and without life (don't worry, kids, he's still alive, just unconscious: D). the helmet glasses thing, now satisfied that all the irritating screaming from its host had been diminished looked around the room. It only ceased to stop searching until it spied a red sweater lying on the floor. It took no delay in zapping the sweater with red laser beams from its eyes, causing the red from the sweater to be absorbed by the head wear. As soon as the sweater had lost all of its red color and lay white on the floor, more wire tentacle things sprouted from the head wear and began to form around the parts of Dibs head that still showed flesh or hair. Realizing that there was nothing red left in the room, only decrepit evil blue things, the head wear opened the door with a free tentacle and floated outside, with Dib still attached and unconscious.

The head wear hovered down the street, zapping the red out of anything it could find; stop signs, fire hydrants, stop lights, anything and everything red, making it grow even greater..

"Good golly gosh, this sunburn hurts," said a man poking at his red skin. The head wear turned and zapped him clean of all his acing red skin, and replaced it with fresh pale white skin. "…Ah!!! Hey, wait a minute; it doesn't hurt anymore...YIPIE!!!"

As the sunburn man walked off, a man with a fresh cut came about.

"Yeowch! I can't believe I cut myself on that Spit-Git-E-O's can, just look at all this fresh RED blood." The head wear turned and Zapped into his cut and took out all the red oxidizing blood cells, turning his blood white with white blood cells, which healed the wound even faster not having the red blood cells in their way now. "Ouch! Hey, cool, all white blood cells, I'm immune to all diseases now! Awesome!!" But no sooner had he thought he was safe from all disease when his skin began to turn dark blue due to lack of red blood cells to carry oxygen to the rest of his body. "…uh-oh…uhhgggg…."

Thud!

Twitch, twitch…..

The head wear grew more tentacles and moved on down the street, zapping red things and growing even larger.

Meanwhile at Skool, the children in the Bitters class all came to their seats and readied themselves for the oncoming lecture of depressing-ness.

As Zim walked in, he noticed that Dib was not to be found in his seat, but rather, could not be found at all. This absence of the big hea…I mean…um…Dib child was most peculiar, and at the same time refreshing.

"Hmmmm…no Dib today," thought Zim. "I wonder if that little explosion yesterday had something to do with his missing…" Zim paused to think about the possible carnage he must have Dib through. As the images of organs dangling from trees and the poor disembodied head lay on a rock with a stick through the eye socket, went through his head Zim began to chuckle. "Ah yes, that would be sweet. Though I doubt I'll be that lucky."

Zim shrugged in disappointment and began balancing a pencil on his lip as Bitters began to talk.

"Class," began Bitters. "Today we'll be talking about the neurological centers in the brain, and how they cause people to behave toward one another."

The class moaned at the sound of that boring discussion (…wait, how would they find that at all boring? That would be an awesome lecture. I'd love to know a bit more on the human thought process. Stupid imaginary kids, they don't know what they're missing).

"So if you look at the…blah, blah, blah…" and so on.

Bitters continued to ramble on for the next few hours or so, on things along the lines that the most utilized center of a persons mind is the ability to rationalize and irrationalize their actions and to ignore anything and everything at would change their rational thinking, so that essentially nothing is ever really rational and that we're all in a state of denial, no matter who we are and what we are irrationalizing about. But seeing as how you're not reading this to figure out how it is we're all irrationalizing on everything, lets skip to the important part, shall we?

The lecture had gone on for some time now and a good bunch of the children had either fallen asleep, or were shoving pencils into their ears as a form of denying the scientific accuracy of the lecture and didn't care to hear about how things like rebelling against their parents by means of even further denial of the fact that WHO WE ARE IS WHO WE MAKE OURSELVES TO BE AND…woah…calming down, almost said something that might have offended some people, don't want to lose my reader population, now do I? Anyway, they shoved pencils into their ears, laugh at their pain (I do everyday).

Zim was falling asleep and about to drop his head when he heard the lunch bell ring.

"There's the lunch bell children, when you come back we'll do some more emphasizing on denial by electro-shock therapy," said Bitters. The children got up and left the room and headed to the cafeteria.

The kids all grumbled at what was on the menu, mainly because it was so indistinguishable from any kind of known food, that not even the lunch staff knew what to call it. It just looked like a big pile of red gloop. Zim just sat down at his normal table and poked at it with his fork.

"bleahggg…how can these people stand to eat this?" said Zim, pulling his head back in pain from the very scent of the gloop.

As he gagged, Zim felt a strange rumbling. He looked around to see the whole establishment shaking, with children falling down face first into their food. Zim then looked toward the large windows and saw that there was a strange red light from the opposite side, glowing sinisterly through the window panes. As the lights got brighter, the rumbling got larger.

"Huh…? What's going on here?" said Zim in a very demanding tone.

Suddenly, the windows and wall exploded with a large red blast, sending debris everywhere. Zim squinted his eyes at the sight of the explosion.

Rummmmmmmmmmmmm…..

Greeeeewwwwww

BOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMM!!!!!!

The room was now covered it debris. Children ran around screaming, either in terror or on fire (mmm, gonna have ourselves a barbeque). From one pile broken drywall and metal, Zim emerged into the chaos.

"What in the name of flaming meat pies is…huh!?!" Zim abruptly ended his sentence to see something horrifying floating just outside the huge hole in the wall.

Hovering there was Dib…at least, that's what it appeared to be. After all, the strange being had Dibs body and the lower half of Dib's face, but the top half was covered by huge tangled mesh of cables, all seeming to originate from the now dark red spectacles that Dib wore, this and that there was a lot of unearthly humming, and sparks of electricity discharging out of random spots in the tangle.

"Huh?!" shouted Zim. "Dib, what's the meaning of this!?" Dib said nothing, he only hovered there, eyes glowing red, staring at Zim's shirt.

"Grrr…SPEAK Dib human, speak noowww." Dib still said nothing, he only stared.

At this point Zim was getting extremely irritated. Glancing at the ground, Zim saw and apple resting right next to his feet.

"Well Dib," said Zim as he kneeled down and picked up the apple. "I didn't think you're already enormous head could get any bigger."

"…not big..."

"SILENCE!! You dare make me wait on you to speak! HAVE SOMMA THIS!!" Shouted Zim as he chucked the apple at Dib.

The apple flew threw the air at a near violent speed toward Dib's toso. As it flew, the lenses turned toward the apple and instantly zapped it out of the air, removing all the red from its form. The apple fell to the ground with a loud thud, smoking hot, and white as a ghost.

WEEE

ZAP!

THUD!!

Sizzle

Zim stared at the now pale apple on the floor and then looked back to Dib.

"…ummm…"

"…red on shirt…must obtain…"

"Huh? What red shirt?" said Zim. He then looked down at his shirt and realized that it was a dark maroon color. As he realized this, another shot from the glasses came out and hit him square in the chest, sending Zim flying back and absorbing the color from the shirt.

ZAP!

OW!

Zim got up and shook the trauma from his head. He glanced down at his now steaming shirt and saw that it had turned pale white.

"Hey!" shouted Zim as he looked up to Dib. "That's my favorite unifo…I mean…um…shirt!" He shifted his eyes around to make sure no one was suspicious of him (rather odd considering the present situation at hand).

Looking back to Dib, he saw that more cords were coming out of the glasses and forming themselves around the already massive head piece. Dib then looked down back at Zim and studied him carefully.

"...red object on back…red eyes…consume…"

Zim looked at his PAK and poked his eyes to check for the lenses.

*poke* OW!!! (He poked his own eyes btw)

Zim looked over to see that the lenses had come off from when he was hit.

"AHHH!!" cried Zim as he sprinted off, dodging the next blast fired at him.

As Zim sprinted off through the school, the glasses followed him, flying through the halls, zapping and absorbing anything red it spotted, even narrowly missing Zim several times.

"AHHHH!!! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME!!!??" cried Zim, not really understanding what was going on.

"Give me…your crimson garb!!"

"…CURSE YOU!!! CURSE YOU AND YOUR INCONSISTANT SYNONYMS!!" shouted Zim as he turned a hallway, narrowly missing another shot.

Zim continued to run down the hall. He was about halfway down and the glasses had not yet reach the turn, and were out of sight as a result. As Zim cleared the halfway point, he didn't seem to notice a blue lunch tray that lay in the middle of his path. His foot hit the tray suddenly and unexpectedly, causing Zim to lose his balance and fall face first on the floor.

Run! Trip! Slip! Splat! OW!!!

"Gya!" cried Zim, lifting his face from the ground. "What in the name of…" before Zim could finish his sentence, the tray he had slipped fell on the back of his head, and it apparently weighed A LOT more then it looked. CRUNCH!! Zim lifted his again, this time with his left eye squinting in something of a combination of pain and irritancy. He turned to the tray, picked it up, and proceeded to scream at it while he still sat on the floor.

"YOU!! YOU CURSED LITTLE SMKBORT! YOU DARE TRY TO STOP ZIM FROM HIS DASHING ESCAPE!!!" As he stared down the tray, it still said nothing…because it was a tray. "SILENCE! Zim cares not for your petty excuses! BUT OH, YOU WILL PAY!!! You will paaayyyy..."

Zim would have snapped the tray in half right then and there, if it wasn't for the fact that the glasses finally made the turn in the hallway and saw Zim sitting in the middle of it all.

"…food source found…must…devour…" Zim looked up with his newly dubbed enemy, the food tray, and right into the glowing red eyes of his pursuer.

"…uh-oh…" was all Zim could say when the next blast came toward him.

Everything seemed to slowdown at that point. In this moment of slowness, Zim turned to his newfound lunch tray foe.

"Listen, Zim doesn't like you and you don't like Zim. But I think that we can both agree that…ah screw it." Zim lifted up the blue lunch tray to block the oncoming blast.

The blast made contact with the lunch tray and absorbed the color, as well as sent Zim flying out a nearby window and out to the sidewalk in front of the school. As the glasses absorbed the blue color from the tray, Dib keeled over in pain.

"NOOOOO!!! The cursed bluueeee…cursed blue!!!" hunched over in pain, some of the wire around Dib's head began to shake and fall off.

The glasses cry of discomfort could be heard for quite some ways. In fact, Zim perked his antenna when he heard the cry.

"Huh!? Who? What? How? ZIM!!!"

Zim ran up back to the window from which he had been thrown and peered in to see the Dib hunched over in pain.

"HA!" laughed Zim. "That's what Zim does when you try to mess with him! Squeal from my…wait…what did I exactly do to you?" Zim thought back for about two seconds, remembering how he blocked the on coming ray with the lunch tray.

"Hmmm…THAT'S IT! The weakness is lunch trays!"

Zim jumped back into the building and sprinted past the still squealing Dib, down the hall, and into the lunch room. He looked around the destroyed eating establishment until he spotted the stack of lunch trays over on the far counter. Zim zipped over to the stack and pickup as many of them as his little Irken arms could allow. As Zim turned around with the arm load, the first thing that came into sight was Dib and the glasses literally two feet in front of him.

"AH!!" cried the startled Zim.

"Give up your crimson nectar!!!" demanded Dib.

"You'll get no such blood juices from me big headed Dib smell!!!" shouted Zim. "Let's see how you like THIS!!" Zim then proceeded to start throwing lunch trays from his stack at Dib's huge target of a head…wait, what the…oh yeah, Dib can't hear me make fun of his head now, HA!

Anyway, the trays bounced off of the, still huge, wrap of wires on Dib's head, each one having little to no affect on him. Un-amused, and somewhat annoyed, the glasses fired off another huge beam of red, this one not absorbing anything, just melting it all into one big pile of molten pudding (no, not literal pudding, it's just a metaphor).

Zim looked at the melted plastic lunch trays and then back to Dib, who hovered over him very intimidating.

"Curse you!" said Zim, dropping to his knees. "Curse you and you're invincible frame!!" The glasses began to charger their beam to take away the redness from Zim's person. "…be gentle," pleaded Zim.

The glasses were now ready to fire. As they took aim, a slight grin came over Zim's face and he put his hands, slowly behind his back.

"Preparing to take red substance, in 3…2…"

"NOYOUDON'T!!" said Zim before the glasses could fire. In his hands, he held GIR in front of his face.

"WOO! How'd I get here?" said GIR with his patented cute GIR smile and voice (who would've though, it's patented!).

"…1?!"

BEOM!!!

It was too late for the glasses to stop, they opened fire and hit GIR. The blast absorbed all the blue stupidity out of GIR (as you can imagine, this was a lot of blue color). All the glasses and Dib could do was hunch over in pain once more, and watch as piece by piece fell off of the wire wrapped monstrosity.

"NOOOOOOOOooooo…bleah...!"

With that last 'bleah', the last wire fell off of Dib's head and to the ground. As Dib fell backward from the huge surge of whatever, the glasses fell off of his face and disintegrated before they hit the ground. As Dib hit the ground with a loud 'thud,' Zim opened his eyes and looked at the pile of his fallen opponent.

"…YES! YES! VICTORY FOR ZIM!!" Zim threw his arms in the air and rejoiced in his success. "GIR was really only meant to block the blast from hitting me so I could escape, but I guess this works too. Good works GIR… say where did GIR go anyway? Who am I talking to? ZIM!"

Zim looked around the room to see if he couldn't spot GIR. He looked for about two seconds before he noticed big bright light hovering over him.

"Huh? What is this?"

Upon closer inspection, Zim saw it was GIR. He was a bit different though. Instead of having red or blue features, he was completely white. He had white angel wings and a halo sitting above his head, and there was a great choir of heavenly creatures praising his name (I know wtf right?).

And GIR spoke unto Zim saying, "Peace my master, for you hath given me new life with witch to claim you're victory. But I say unto you, thou must be…" and by this point, Zim had grown sick of hearing GIR's angelic crap and threw a piece of ruble at his head to make him stop talking.

The impact of the stone to GIR's head sent the little robot hurdling back toward the floor, knocking off the wings and halo, and returning his features to blue.

"Aw," said GIR after having hit the ground. "I wanted to ascend."

"Yeah, sure ya did," said Zim rolling his eyes. "Let's just go home." And with that, Zim grabbed GIR's hand and dragged him out of the huge hole made by Dib in the beginning of the episode, leaving Dib lying unconscious of the floor.

End of Episode 21

Dear lord that took forever! Sorry it took me so long to post this, I've just been really busy with school and all that I've hardly had time for this. I wanted to do something without Da'as or Zet, and stay traditional to a Dib Zim episode; I think it turned out pretty well. Oh, and the whole angelic GIR thing is not trying to make fun of spirituality, it's just silly. I'm a very religious person and don't want to offend any other religious folk with my slap stick angel humor. I'll try to get the next episode written as soon as I can. Oh, speaking of which, I want your opinions, should I have the next episode be the origin story of Da'as or Zet, or should I just jump right to the season 2 of my series finale? Just tell me in your comments, and once the comments stop coming in, I'll tally up the votes. Please comment nicely!!

Copywrite Jhonen Vasquez/Invader Zim