"Realizations"
By Isis
Chapter 21

"Oh, my…" Sally trailed out as she got out of her car. Pulling her sunglasses off she stared around her at the mob of people congesting the street and forcing her to park two blocks away.

Walking slowly through the crowded sidewalk, she caught groups of people swarming around. Coming and going, messages and banners held high by some. It was like a street parade except that the pedestrians were trying to keep clear of the crawling traffic that managed to slide by.

Relena's residence had been turned into not only a media reporter's camp out, but also one of the largest crowds of supporters that Sally had ever seen. The, mostly decorative, iron fence that surrounded the property line was littered with signs, notes, letters, gifts, teddy bears, flowers and candles. Anything you could think of was piled in a heap all along the sidewalk in front of her estate.

The crowd knew no race or creed or age. A good-sized group of schoolgirls sang from one part of the area, doing fairly good at a couple popular songs as Sally continued to push her way past people towards the front gates.

But as soon as she made her way towards the on guard Preventer officer with the house security, the press reporters had spotted her uniform jacket. She was literally surrounded in seconds, questions firing at her for desperate information on what she knew about Relena's condition or anything else related to the case.

Sally knew very well that any sound-bite she gave them would be used, so she kept her mouth completely shut, only giving a polite smile as she was jostled around trying to get through. Finally one of the security officers grabbed her elbow and hauled her through the walking gate, closing it tightly behind her.

"Sorry, Ma'am," he apologized for the rough handling once she was through.

"It's alright. How long has it been like this?" she asked, casting another look over the crowd.

"Gets bigger every day," he confessed, warily eyeing the reporters that were still trying to crowd the gate.

"Wonderful," she sighed to herself. Giving the officer a smile of thanks she took off for the house at a brisk walk. It was too cold out here for her anyway.

Getting through the front doors, she was a little surprised to find Heero standing at one of the front windows beside it, watching the crowd as well. "You made it through," he commented without turning away from the view.

"Barely," she agreed stepping over to his side and looking out as well. "We're going to have to break this fast or it's going to get out of hand."

Sally shivered under her jacket, but she wasn't sure if it was the outside temperature or the cold that she felt physically come off of the man beside her.

"How do I possibly get them to go home?" Relena asked, worriedly frowning at the throng of people outside the front fence. "It's freezing out there."

For three days she had stayed out of all public eye. No comments, no appearances, not even a written statement. The flock of people outside of her estate was one thing, but there were similar supportive demonstrations going on in front of Preventer Headquarters and the Capital building as well. And the sheer amount of outpouring support and well wishes from every colony and Earthen providence was… amazing.

"They're in for the duration," Sally noted. "Commander Une is ready to make a declaration that the case has been completed and closed, whether it is or not, just to calm everyone down."

Relena turned back to face her, still noting that Heero hadn't moved from his place leaned against the sitting room's doorway. "That's not going to fix this," she refuted, waving a hand towards the window and the view beyond.

"She also wants you to make an official appearance and statement. Something remote from the Capital pressroom. We say that you're going back to work, but will be taking touring slowly for a while."

That was the best news she'd heard in days. "Wonderful. When?"

With a glace over to Heero, Sally shrugged. "Whenever you're ready I guess."

"I'll do it tomorrow then," she stated. "It should be easy enough to round up enough network reporters to film the presentation on short notice." They'd be fighting each other over the chance.

"We have to get you out of here first," Heero reminded her.

Relena swallowed and looked out at the people out on the street. "If Commander Une makes an announcement that I'll have a statement to make, it should help."

"I agree," Sally added. "Une already has a conference set up for this afternoon. She'll be willing to do that, I'm sure."

She nodded to herself. Relena didn't care what she had to say, she just wanted out of here and out of this mess. The press was running wild with accusations.

"You know… this isn't really my place," Sally started in again. Relena turned back to find she had risen to her feet and was headed for the door. "But you two may need to…" she paused and glanced at both of them with a smirk, "coordinate your story."

And with far too happy of a smile, the older woman walked out the door again, slapping Heero on the shoulder as she went.

It was enough to squash her heart in her chest as Relena moved from the window to sit down in one of the chairs. "She's right," she whispered. "It won't have to be tomorrow, but I'll have to admit to the insinuations sometime soon."

She knew that he understood exactly what she meant. The entire Sphere was basically draped in images of the two. Relena had absolutely stopped listening to the reports anymore, afraid of what she was going to hear about her own love-life.

But the major problem in correcting their thinking was the fact that… she didn't know what the truth was to correct it to.

"I knew better."

It was barely a whisper, possibly something that she wasn't supposed to catch, but in the absolute silence of the room it carried. And it echoed in her head as Relena looked up at him again. Heero stood against the wall still, his arms crossed in front of him, his head bowed and his eyes unfocused on the floor in front of him.

Knew better… Then it had finally come.

Relena rose to her feet again and slowly paced up in front of him. Stopping a few feet from him, she tried to ignore the searching look he gave her. She tried, but there was simply too much of her that didn't want to ask again.

He promised he'd stay. He promised…

Her last good resolve cracked and instead of facing him like she'd intended, she closed the distance to him instead and met his embrace. Wrapping her arms around him, she crossed under his jacket, just beneath the shoulder holster he wore. Burying her face in his shoulder she stole just a second to collect herself.

"We just can't get a break," she quietly confessed. Every milestone that they had reached had been forced or displaced by some kind of atrocity. Was that destined to be the absolute story of their lives? Where was the happily ever after? She was sick of sharing him with the villains.

But Relena knew better. She knew that Heero would never be completely hers. He would always be fighting something. He had lost himself to war, given his life over to it, before she had even known him. She could feel it sometimes. And as much as she wanted to forget it, she couldn't.

Neither could he. She knew he blamed himself for the media's exploitation of them. It wasn't fair, but he did. It was done and over. The problem now was… "What do we do now?"

'Just please don't leave.'

At one point, Relena could have given him up. She could have let him go just knowing that he was as safe as she could make it for him. She couldn't do that anymore. She was ready to admit that she would cease to function without him. That she'd throw away her career and life and disappear if it meant she could follow him.

It was always her fear. Even if he had promised, it was still a nagging worry she tried to ignore.

He must have felt it in her. His arms tightened around her, pressing her to him. "I won't be any help to you."

Any help? When wasn't he a help to her? No, a help with the media problem, then. Turning her face to lay against his shoulder, she took a deep breath. "I don't care what the press says. I refuse to let them dictate me anymore." Her voice came out far clearer that she had expected it to. "What I need… is to know where we stand."

As soon as the words left her mouth she was ashamed of them. Why was she forced to do this? She had promised herself never to rush him, never to ask how he felt, never to pressure him.

When no reaction seemed to be coming immediately, she leaned back from him and raised her head to meet his eyes. He looked back at her, confused obviously. "Promise me again you'll stay," she whispered, her voice close to cracking. "Promise me we're together."

She didn't have a name for the surprised mix of emotions that went through his eyes, the midnight blue holding seemingly nothing back for just this one moment. And it seemed to take forever, but she waited, not daring to turn away from him. Finally, he seemed to come to peace with something and slowly leaned into her, catching her lips is a small kiss.

"…I promise," he whispered, his lips barely leaving hers enough to form the words before he sealed them against hers again. This time he lengthened their kiss, letting it grow between them.

Relena responded. Turning from the rag-doll she felt like in his arms, she pressed his kiss back, and tightened her embrace around him.

No one was going to make her let him go. No one and nothing.

By the time he pulled away, her breath was rapid and her heart was stripped bare. The ache in her chest was harsh as he loosened his hold on her to be comfortable again. Slowly she sobered, reigning herself back in.

Raising a hand between them she covered over his heart and Heero bowed his face to place their foreheads together. She didn't even open her eyes. Relena stayed right there in him arms, safe and… loved. Maybe just once she'd used that word for what she felt in him.

"Heero," she whispered, hoping not to disturb the mood.

"Hn."

Peeking her eyes open she looked up at him, a smile coming to her lips despite herself. "This is going to sound dumb," she began, fighting a cringe. Lifting his face to be able to focus on her, he only waited, his expression soft and affectionate. "Can I… call you my boyfriend?" she timidly asked before immediately flashing an embarrassed smile and closing her eyes on the reaction.

To her surprise, he actually chuckled at her and she popped her eyes open to stare up at him. He gave her one of his little smiles, "Whatever you want." Leaning down again he caught her in a light kiss and she melted in his arms.

A soft sigh escaped her as he pulled away again. Heero must have heard it because she felt him chuckle again as she landed her head on his shoulder once more. "I love you, Heero," she whispered.

"You should have expected this."

That was getting annoying. "I did," he refuted, his voice dark and as controlled as he could get it. Zechs sat, staring at the frozen image on the computer in their personal quarters.

"He did the right thing," Lucrezia continued, making laps around their bedroom between the bathroom and the closet. "She's safe."

"Safe from what?" he ground out, still staring at the image that mocked him from the newscasts that had already reached Mars at an alarming rate.

"Zechs, she's perfectly capable of taking care of her own love life. Even if that does include Heero Yuy."

His wife was decisively not helping him.

"Besides," she stopped whatever she was doing enough to walk up behind him and run her hands over his shoulders, "she's used to stubborn men." With a pat she moved away again since he didn't bother to stop her. "They're good for each other, and he just saved her from another kidnapping or whatever. Send him a thank you note."

Like hell he would. His former rival might have finally gone soft for his sister, but that didn't mean that Zechs had to start being friendly with him. It wasn't part of their relationship.

And it didn't mean that Heero could touch her either. A fact that he'd like to very personally remind the younger man of…

"Glaring at that thing isn't going to help," came the next little singsong. She was laughing at him, and he knew it.

But she was right. Clicking the monitor off, he was disgusted with it. Torn as usual, Zechs could only remind himself that at least she was safe. And, if forced and tortured to admit it, he knew Heero would keep her that way.

Besides, he was mildly thankful that he didn't have to be involved in how they were going to handle this mess.

"Does anyone else think that maybe we should let the Vice Minster out more? Is the poor girl reduced to dating her security? Most women pick up guys in bar; she just goes through the personnel directory."

"Is this guy for real or did the romantic-action playwrights all move to the Capital? Honestly, I watched that clip the first time and went, OK, OK, where's the 'Coming to a Theater Near You' line?"

"Is this part of the benefit's package? Vacation, sick leave, handsome, heroic bodyguard… 'Cause if it is, sign me up! I'll run against her for that man."

"Now, I was sitting casually at a little café on Colony when the news broke that there'd been an attempt made on the Vice Minister. So I end up standing in a town square with like seven hundred other people hoping for the best, watching the jumbo screen. And then they start this playback, and I swear to you the entire place broke out from absolute silence to gasps and ahs and cheers. I haven't been part of a crowd like that since my team won the Colony Cup."

"Who knew politics could be so rewarding? Stop a war, promote peace, have your pick of the world's sexiest Preventers. I mean, what does she do for overtime?"

"I find this man terrifying. He's obviously still a teenager and he's throwing bodies around and shooting people like a trained assassin. Where are the Preventers finding guys like this? Prison?"

"Patriotism seems to be at an all-time high following the recent attacks against the Vice Foreign Minister. Crowds are pouring out in throngs to show their support of the peace-minded Miss Darlian. On a side note, Preventer recruiting has seen a twenty percent increase in hopefuls. Apparently watching someone get shot in the line of duty is a good catalyst. …Go figure."

Relena strode into the Presidential wing's pressroom as calmly as she could manage. Ry and Alli flanked her, taking positions between the podium and the mass of media reporters. Other officers were positioned around the room, all keeping a strict eye on the thoroughly checked and scanned network camera crews.

She had done her own makeup for the event, allowing the professional staff here only to touch up her cheek as well as possible to try to cover the bruise that was still tender and a bit swollen. But she didn't leave her hair down to mask it. Instead she pulled it back as usual in a low ponytail. Wearing a teal blue skirt suit she gave a polite smile to the waiting public.

"Good morning, everyone, thank you for coming," she started as she reached the podium. "This morning I will have only a prepared statement for you, I will not be answering questions yet, and I will make this short."

She still felt alone. With a crowd full of people, Relena felt left to their mercy. Heero was waiting down the hall in an unused meeting room. Commander Une had forcefully stated that he wasn't to be anywhere near the reporters.

Seemingly as a sign of camaraderie, Une herself was present as well, near the doors to the room. Turned out to hear her speech. All of the Sphere seemed to be holding their breath for these short words.

She began easily, earnestly, by assuring the general public that she was fine and suffered no real injuries due to the attack. Next she went on to thank her security team and the local Preventer and Police forces that saved her. Giving a brief update on Delano's condition, she added a side note that the suspects were also recovering. Relena thanked all of those who were showing their support of her through letters, gifts, and prayers.

She made no mention of Heero. Aside from the sweeping praise that she graced upon her team, she didn't answer any of the questions that she knew everyone wanted to ask. There would be time for that later. Right now, she only wanted to show that her personal issues were not being placed before her work, at least to the outside world.

If it was the right choice she didn't know. She only knew that she wasn't ready to tell the entire Sphere about him in five hundred words or less at a press conference.

"To close, I once again wish to thank everyone for the support that I have seen poured out for me. I truly appreciate it. Commander Une will be speaking to you yet this afternoon on the case itself. Thank you for coming," she slightly bowed to the crowd and slipped away from the podium towards the doors.

Ry and Alli attached themselves to her once more as Relena exchanged smiles with the Preventer Commander on her way out. She tried not to listen to the questions being fired after her nonetheless, but couldn't fail to notice that most had to do with the issue she had neglected.

"Good morning, ladies and gentlemen," the other woman began, getting the room back.

As she exited, Relena sighed with relief.

The elder man let out a long sigh from his desk chair. Melton Pearl gave the television an averse smirk and shook his head. "We're screwed."

"I'm relieved, of course. What other reactions could I have to this?" Richard Pearl insisted. Why did everyone seem to think he was going to congratulate violent criminals or something? "Being a political rival doesn't mean I would ever want to see any harm come to Miss Darlian, or anyone else for that matter. I'm glad that she's safe."

"Mr. Pearl, do you still believe that Preventer protection is unnecessary?"

"Prevetner protection is unnecessary. However, there is obvious need for a team of some type for our government officials. I am thankful that such a team was in place for the Vice Minister."

"Do you believe this will hurt your election bid?"

He was lucky that anyone remembered his name right at the moment. "The issues are the same no matter what. Miss Darlian has been, and will remain to be, an icon for the ESUN government and it's fitting that she has this kind of support. No matter what her role, I would expect this type of concern for her."

"Can you comment on your relationship with Lois Donte?"

How the…? "Miss Donte is an excellent media host, and I was privileged to have been on her program."

"But nothing of a romantic involvement?"

Where were these people finding out about that from? "Our meetings have been strictly friendly," he chuckled at the idea.

"But not merely professional?"

Oh, hell…

"I don't have another choice, Heero. You will be kept on a restricted basis with her. Your actions as Security Commander will remain. But the press is eating everything alive. The less we put you in front of a camera, the better for both of you."

The man in front of her was not happy. Somewhere in the cold, unemotional countenance of those dark eyes, she figured he was thoroughly pissed actually. She knew she would be.

Une stood behind her desk facing him. "We'll know shortly how careful we will need to be in the future. We're being bombarded for information on you specifically, and none of it is about your official record. I have every resource I can call in working on the problem, but we have to keep you out of the line of sight."

"Her team is already one short."

Calm, calculated, to the point, no mark of his obvious agitation. She would never expect anything less from him. "Relena's schedule will be careful and conservative for a while anyway. There's no reason to expect another attack, this team seems to have been acting on their own, but it doesn't mean someone else won't get an idea. You will be on each trip; I just don't want you physically shadowing her. To the press, you will disappear."

There was a curt nod, but nothing in that seemed to ease any of his muscles.

"Subsequently, I have another job for you," she shifted. Picking up two folders off her desk she tossed them across towards him. "There are two cadets that will finish officer's training in two weeks. I am considering placing them on your team."

Heero stepped forward and opened both folders in front of him. "Ather will be back to active duty in four weeks."

"I'm counting on it," she stated. "These aren't replacements. That's just how I want them to think of it."

That got him to raise his eyes back to her instantly.

A fitting reaction. "Both men will pass the courses with some of the best scores we've had so far. It was to be expected. However, I need a place to start them out under a little cautious… scrutiny," she confided. "They both have Romafeller history."

"And you're placing them with Relena?" he challenged.

"I'm placing them with you," she corrected. "They have been vouched for repeatedly, and I have every confidence in their sincerity. But I've been wrong before, and I'm not ready to take the chance of putting them into active duty at their own discretion yet. I believe they will be very useful officers once I'm assured of them." Pausing she gave him a hint of a smile. "I believe you will find them useful for Relena's upcoming functions."

Lowering his eyes back to the folders, he continued scanning them. "The fundraiser."

She nodded. If Dorothy Catalonia was correct about these two, then they should be ample help to Relena's team and able to prove themselves quickly. She had plans for the two young men. "Yes. I will have them set on a four month tour of duty under you."

"Byron Solvana and Andrew Varnhem," he read.

No, the man in front of her was definitely not happy.

"There is in every true woman's heart a spark of heavenly fire, which lies dormant in the broad daylight of prosperity; but which kindles up, and beams and blazes in the dark hour of adversity." - Washington Irving

"Damaged people are dangerous. They know they can survive." - Josephine Hart