U is for Us

Thursday, April 15, 2021

Anastasia

It's nine o'clock and I've finally got the kids down. I'm exhausted, and the twins will need to nurse again in another three hours. This is Mommy-Daddy time.

"Mrs. Grey, will you join me for a nightcap?"

"Yes. Sleepytime tea, please."

"Way to live on the edge," Christian chides. "I'll join you."

He puts the kettle on, and leans against the counter, pulling me with him. My weight presses against his core. He's my comfort. We hold each other in silence.

The kettle whistle and front door bell simultaneously startle us from our serenity.

"I'll fix the tea, while you get the door," I say. Only family and close friends like Raj, Bandi, Ros, and Gwen know the gate code, but no one visits without calling first, and certainly not late in the evening.

Voices and footsteps approach, and I quickly recognize Mia's sounds.

When I see her, I can tell something is off. Christian frowns in concern.

"What's going on?" I ask.

"Oh, Ana, I'm confused." Mia throws her arms around me in her typical dramatic fashion.

"Christian and I were just about to have tea. How about you? Tea always makes things better."

"Yes. Thank you."

"Sit down and tell us everything." Christian pulls out a stool at the kitchen island for Mia, and sits next to her.

"I think Ethan is going to propose."

"Oh, Mia," I throw my arms around her. "That's so exciting."

"I found his Grandmother Aggie's ring in his coat pocket, along with a receipt for having it resized. This is what I've wanted for years," she says. "At least it's what I thought I wanted. But now that it's a real possibility, I'm in a panic."

"Why panic?" Christian asks, sitting down next to Mia at the island.

"I don't know if I can be everything he needs. I don't know if I can be a wife."

"We all struggle with that," I tell her. "I worried the same thing when I married Christian."

"You did?" Mia asks in disbelief.

"I felt the same way about being a husband," Christian says.

"I'm thirty-two and Ethan is thirty-five. We're set in our ways."

"Nonsense," Christian says. "Think of all the changes you've made in the last few years. You're a very adaptable person. And Ethan is a therapist. Your ages and experiences should be an advantage to both of you. If any two have the promise of success, it's you and Ethan."

"It's you two who are the role models for marriage," Mia says. "I don't think any of us were sure of what to expect from the two of you, but your marriage has been good from the start."

"You never saw our disagreements," I say, unable to stifle my giggle.

"Or my meltdowns," Christian adds.

I serve the mugs of tea to Christian and Mia.

"Any advice?" Mia asks, then takes a long sip.

"The meltdowns were partially my fault," I admit. "Be careful what you say to Ethan. Once you say something, you can't take it back. Early on, I took issue with Christian's protective ways, and I threatened to pack up and move back to Montesano. It was a stupid, empty threat."

"Baby, you sent me into a tailspin. I thought you were abandoning me." I recall Christian's panic and I feel shame over it.

"I know, and I still get upset with myself when I remember that. I'm sorry."

"It was a long time ago. We're way past that, baby." Christian reaches across the quartz countertop for my hand.

"You two have always had such an intense attraction for one another," Mia says. "Is that the key? Because I don't know if Ethan and I have something that powerful."

"Our strong chemistry has helped us," I concede. Christian gives me a wink. "Attraction is important, but it really takes a high level of acceptance and commitment for a successful union. You and Ethan started off as friends, and that makes for a stable foundation."

"We've always gotten along well," Mia says, "and living together for the past two years has been amazing. I just don't want anything to change."

"Things will change," I tell her. "Especially if you have children. But your love for each other doesn't have to change."

"What's the secret to keeping the love? You're the aspirational couple, the couple everyone talks about. There must be some secret."

"There is no secret, no magic formula. Here's what I know," Christian offers. "From our early mistakes, Anastasia and I learned to choose us. Sometimes 'us' intersects with 'me,' but much of the time it doesn't. Compromise means neither person gets everything they want, but they do get each other. In every situation, Anastasia and I choose us. Over everyone and everything, it's always us."

"I don't know why you're so spooked," I tell Mia. "You're brave, fierce, and strong. You can do anything. You took down Elena and saved my life. Look at how you've built your clientele and how you turned your finances around. Ethan has always been your one true love, and he's choosing you. Clearly he thinks you'll make the perfect wife. You're everything he wants and needs."

Mia takes a sip of tea and closes her eyes for a moment, considering what we've told her.

"This ring just came out of the blue. We've never talked about marriage in anything but abstract terms. I saw the ring tonight and I panicked. Ethan thinks I'm at Bartell's picking up Tampax and Listerine. I need to get back home. And maybe he's not really going to propose, and I've just gotten worked up for nothing."

"Or maybe he is," Christian says. "Did you know Ethan had lunch with Dad yesterday?"

"No." Mia's mouth drops open in surprise.

"I talked to Dad right after, and he was in an exceptionally good mood. Maybe Ethan asked for Dad's blessing. For what it's worth, Ana and I have always thought you and Ethan would make a good match. In any case, you'll be fine."

"I'm sure you're right. Thank you," Mia says. She takes a final gulp of tea and stands to give each of us a hug. "I love you both. I better go."

Christian walks her to the door, while I tidy up.

I consider Mia's case of jitters. She's treating marriage with the gravity it deserves, and I regard this as a sign of her hard-fought maturity. Her spoiled ways are gone, and she's grown into a woman of depth and independence.

When Christian returns to the kitchen, he's laughing.

"You're golden, baby, but when did I become qualified to give marital advice?"

"We're coming up on ten years, so I think you definitely know a thing or two. You certainly know how to keep me very happy."

I close the dishwasher door and Christian hits the start button.

"Did you hear what Mia said? Aspirational couple. Role models for marriage. I'm proud of us." My husband's grey eyes shimmer with love and happiness.

"Me too," I say, flipping off the kitchen lights.

Christian scoops me into his arms, exactly the way he did when he first carried me across the threshold years ago. He's done this countless times since, and it always makes me feel cherished.

"Come along, my beauty, time for bed."

XXXXXXX

Thank you for the faves, follows, and reviews. They are my payday!