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Chapter 25: Concentrated love- POV: Lily

Lily had sat in her bed, crying and staring at the ripped piece of paper that used to mark how many times Potter had asked her out. He had given up after 21038th time. The mysterious mirror haunted her in her sleep. Why did it know about her deepest desire? Why?

She was pulled out of her bed and into Hogsmeade at exactly four o'clock in th afternoon by her best friend Marlene, who was convinced that she needed to chill out. She followed her friend blindly and arrived at the Three Broomsticks. "You are going to have a shot to make you forget about what you are sad about," Marlene told Lily as she gestured to Madame Rosmereta. "I want a fire whiskey..." "Make it two," Lily said. The barlady took one look at the girl's puffy red eyes and left.

"Are you sure about this?" Marlene asked the girl who had never ever had her share of the wizarding alcoholic beverages.

"Bring it on,"she said as she poured the fiery liquid into her throat. She smiled. It was exactly how she wanted it to be- acid to burn away the frayed bits that love had caused in her heart.

~POV:Ginny~

The six marauders entered the pub, their arms laden with bundles from Zonko's, Honeydukes, Scrivencraft's etc. Remus and Hermione were chatting away happily about their Ancient Runes essay. James and Ginny was repeatedly saying the word,"infinity" over and over again and kissing each other. Sirius was chatting up another girl, while Peter was talking to his girlfriend, Beatrice, whom Hermione had introduced him to, the couple was sitting in a quiet corner of the pub, exchanging jokes and pecks on their cheeks.

"I want a firewhiskey," Sirius said to Madame Rosmereta as he gestured to his friends for them to call for drinks. "Two firewhiskeys," James said as Ginny put her hand on James's as she gazed into the distance. She was thinking of the time when she and Harry went for a drink in Hogmeade, an innocent trip to the bar after a potions class, that ended up to be the most thrilling thing of her life. He was gentle, soft, caring, trusting. He knew that she could have been an assassin, planted in his second year by his mortal enemy, to kill him at his weakest. Yet he let himself become naked in front of her, as helpless as a lamb is to a lion. He had trusted her fully. He always looked into her light brown speckled eyes with a tender, loving look. She had to repay him. This was not how his father loved. It was how Lily loved, not his father. His father loved with all his heart, his care was like a tempest, planting his love firmly into her heart. She knew that James didn't love her fully, totally, but the attention he gave her was enough to fulfil her small wanting for someone to care for her, for someone to love her, and for someone to love in return.

Yet she saw the opposite in Lily. Lily had to prevent herself, from falling head over heels in love. She couldn't afford that. She was a lowly muggleborn, unworthy of a good job. Maybe she would be able to be a healer or a low-class ministry head-of-department, like her father. This was not worthy of the Gryffindor prefect. They both had excellent grades, far surpassing those of their age and those with purer blood than theirs.

Ginny felt a strong pull in her heart, telling her to go, go and tell James to date Lily, for she needed his love. But she, she was greedy. She knew it. She needed the love as well, and James was an easy target. He was easy to love, and she believed that she would fall in love with him, if not naturally, by time. Time softened people, made their wishes and desires weaker. But the pull in her heart suggested that this wasn't going to happen.

But she did it anyways.

~Back to Lily POV~

Lily was sipping her drink and thinking about love. Love was a mysterious thing- a thing that could both kill you and save you. Love was a knife, that could be used for saving a captive of loneliness or killing an unsuspecting victim. It was horrible- the knife was a long blade with hook-like spikes- it didn't hurt to drive it in, but it hurt so badly to put it out once it resides in you. Once you get stabbed, there's no turning back. Of course, you could dodge the blade, the blade of devoted love, but little did.

If only love were a hard-to-brew potion, were a concoction that Lily could brew or invent. Concentrated love, she'd call the potion. But even the strongest of love potions couldn't compare to true love. The love from your parents are true love, but reflected true love. Pure love in its glory could shatter glass, break diamonds, or destroy the universe. That was why humans needed love- it was in their veins. When God had first breathed air into Adam, the first human in the bible, he had given Adam a fraction of his capacity to love. Lily thought it was just too hard to imagine. The love of humans was already so intense, so pure, so devoted, so powerful. How much more powerful was the love of God?

The worst thing was that the only way to cure scars made by the blade of love was to have it drive though you again.

I'd take the potion any day, Lily though to herself as she tried not to stare at the perfect, beautiful couple in front of them. They were flawless, Lily thought as she forced herself to look towards a different location. Sirius Black was on the dance floor, kissing a brunette that looked so familiar. "Probably a Hufflepuff whose idol was this git," she said as she realised something. Sirius, though he wouldn't admit it, was lacking love from someone. Sure he had absolutely tons and tons of admirers, but none of them was the one to give him the intense love that his parents refused to give him. His eyes bore a forlorn and lonely look, a look that she had seen in her eyes. Yet she refused to give love another try.

As she turned her head to have another peak at the boy she secretly loved, she heard their conversation, that had her in tears and running back to her dorm.

"Ginny, you are the divine goddess of my life, you know?"James said as he slowly cupped Ginny's face. Lily felt a surge of jealousy soar though her veins. How she wished that she was James' girl. And the most appalling thing was that the girl had fiery red hair, only a shade lighter than hers. It was mocking her- telling her that she would have no chance with love. A voice echoed though her mind as she ran, saying that she would never be able to love, for her heart was made of ice...

Her sister had told her that.