Sam was definitely in better shape than Piper was. The difficulty was in getting Piper to admit it.
She did her best to keep their hiking at a reasonable speed. Personally, she felt like they should have just turned around and gone back to Diamond City. It was safe there, easy there. She had nothing to prove by going out on these increasingly long forays. That was what she told herself, anyway.
"Hey, Blue?"
Piper had been the one to suggest they travel north again. The fact that their feet were leading them up towards Sanctuary Hills again was mere coincidence. In her heart of hearts, she wasn't ready to go back yet. To see Codsworth again, to walk the street she'd once called home.
But Piper was a reporter. She needed stories. Sam owed this to her. Maybe it would help tie together everything she'd been trying to write since their interview.
"Blue, c'mon..."
She slowed her pace some, looking behind her as she walked. "Sorry, what's up Piper?"
The very name felt strange in her throat. That name belonged to someone, someone real. All of this was real. She wasn't dreaming. She wasn't going to wake up.
Maybe it was their proximity to Sanctuary, their gradual approach to Concord. It reminded her, inescapably, of those first moments in the new world. Thinking about it left her feeling cold each time.
Piper was talking again — something about her swatter, her choice to fight up close. The individual words blurred past her. Did she not get that it wasn't a choice? That she was too scared to pick up a gun and fire it? Too weak?
But then everything stopped. She stopped. Piper stopped. Her thinking stopped, as did her heart.
"Piper, do you hear that?"
From the corner of her eye, she saw the woman reaching for her pistol. "What? I hear nothing."
True enough, there were barely any sounds. Not even a breeze. But in the distance, she heard the familiar pop of gunfire. And something else, something new, like a muffled bolt of thunder.
She pointed to the sound. "Concord."
Piper lowered her gun and looked at her. "Yeah Blue, there's always noise in Concord. It's just one of those towns. A hotbed for raiders."
"No," Sam flatly disagreed. "Something's different, this time."
She motioned for Piper to stay quiet. There it was again, almost predictable. It wasn't thunder; it sounded... somehow... bright. It was a sound she hadn't heard before, from any band of raiders, or really anywhere at all.
"Come on, Piper. Let's check this out!"
She had barely started to move when— "Blue, are you crazy?!"
She halted midstep and turned back around. "What? What are you talking about?"
The reporter's expression was not kind. "Blue, you want to go running into Concord, just the two of us, with nothing but my gun and your swatter?"
Sam shrugged her shoulders. "Yeah, why not? We just took out a whole raiding party ourselves last night. Maybe there are people up here who need help too."
"That's exactly what I'm talking about!" her friend retorted. "And what are you going to do, just run up and bash every one of their faces in?"
Sam felt a sudden pain run through her heart. Did she really have to make this personal? "That's not fair, Piper. I don't want to kill people any more than you do. But if they're bad, right? You said so yourself!"
"That's not what I mean!" Piper sighed in frustration and rolled her eyes. "We don't know what we'd be getting into, alright? I don't want to have to drag you out if you get shot down. I don't know if I'd even be able to."
Sam nodded, yielding to her point. "Then we'll play it safe, alright? I promise I won't go barging in... not like I was even planning to! Because no, I'm not crazy."
Piper seemed to cringe a little, reliving her prior choice of words.
Sam forced a smile for her friend. "Come on, we'll be fine."
She turned and started to take a step forward again — towards Concord, towards this mystery — when she felt a hand yank on her arm, jerk her back into facing Piper again. She stumbled forward as she did. They were suddenly standing a lot closer to than they had a moment ago.
"Th- that's not the problem." Piper stammered. "You've s- seen me fight with you. Like, alongside you, I mean! That's fine! Or, well, I guess it's more behind you, you know what I mean?"
Blue tilted her head a little a squinted her eyes. She had a feeling she knew where this was going.
"Blue... I'm asking... I've been trying to ask you all morning... Why do you always have to take the front? Why can't you stay back and just use a gun like I do?"
Samantha stood still, paralyzed. Not shocked — she'd seen this coming — just unsure how to reply. Her question was valid. Too valid. She lost herself in shame. What could she say? 'They just feel wrong in my hands?' Hah, like she'd buy that.
Piper waved a hand sarcastically. "Blue, you in there?"
Sam had to close her eyes, she was so ashamed of her own words. "I don't know why I can't, Piper. I just know that I can't. Before the war, after the war, young, old, even pretend. I hate myself whenever I've had to use one. I can't explain it. It hurts me..."
She opened her eyes. She hated guns. She hated herself even more. "Okay?"
Piper looked confused by this. Of course she did. Sam couldn't blame her. It was her weakness — hew flaw. Impervious to common sense.
Sam turned and walked one final time towards Concord. Piper followed after her. "Hey, you gonna be alright?"
She had no idea if she was going to be alright. She hadn't had an idea of that since she'd left the Vault.