Disclaimer: Not mine.
Chapter Twenty Five
BPOV
This is Edward; leave a message.
I pressed the end button and rocked my phone back and forth in my hands as I chewed on the inside of my cheek. I still hadn't been able to reach him today even though I'd called over and over again.
I dropped my purse and phone in the bin and slipped my shoes off before stepping forward and passing through security. The same gnawing feeling of unease slithered up my spine as doubt spread from the recesses of my mind like an infectious disease, poisoning and deteriorating all the small fragments that had slowly began to heal.
Was I doing the right thing? What would I find once I got there? What if he was really done with me? What if it was something else entirely?
I shuffled to my gate and fell into a chair as far away from the other passengers as I could get and pulled in deep, steady breaths. I remembered his words from the last conversation we had. How he told me he loved me, that he would never love anyone else, that it didn't matter.
It didn't matter.
He had been drugged. He was given a substance that inhibited his ability to control his actions. He didn't sleep with someone else because he was tired of me, of us, or our relationship. He loved me.
My breaths began to steady, and my vision cleared. He loved me. He loved me. And I loved him. And this was going to work, because the alternative wasn't an option.
I pulled out my phone again, butterflies erupting in anticipation of seeing his face, soaking in the heat of his skin, and feeling the electricity of his touch.
I jerked in surprise when it rang, my brows knitting in confusion as Rose's name flashed across the screen. Our interactions had basically been nonexistent since I figured out Emmett's intentions to hide the truth about Edward from me.
"Hello."
"Bella." She exhaled, her voice tight.
"Rose, hey." An awkward silence fell, and for a moment I thought the call had dropped until I heard her pull in a deep breath.
"Where are you? Are you at work or home or..." she trailed off.
"I'm at the airport actually." I felt that same jolt of excitement and anxiety, and suddenly I wanted to tell her everything.
I'd avoided everything and everyone that had reminded me of Edward with embarrassing efficiency. If I was going to try and make things work with him, should I also try and repair all of the other broken relationships in my life?
"Oh thank God. You already know." Her relief was palpable, however her comment had the exact opposite effect on me because my entire frame stiffened with dread. The same feeling that something wasn't right washed over me once more.
"Know what?" I whispered, my throat tight.
The silence on the line was deafening.
"Know what, Rose?" Fear spiked and caused my voice to harden, my words to sharpen.
"That Edward's in the hospital." Her voice was so soft I had to strain to catch her words, and once I did, I suddenly wished I hadn't. She was calling about Edward― and he was...where?
"Rose, you need to speak up, and you need to tell me what the hell is going on, because I'm starting to freak out a little." That was a lie; I was already freaking out, and a hell of a lot more than a little.
"Bella, I'm so sorry." Her voice broke as she sucked in a ragged breath, and my knees wobbled and buckled with each choking sob that slipped past her lips.
"Wha- why are you sorry?" I leaned forward, the room spinning, a cold sweat breaking out across my forehead.
"Marcus came by and he told Emmett about what happened, about that skank Alice, and―" She sucked in another sharp breath before her words came rushing out all at once. "It's bad, Bella; oh my God, it's so bad. Marcus said he'd moved back into your old apartment, and he's on drugs, bad drugs. He went to see him, and Edward had coke, and pills, and God knows what else all over the apartment. He said he was talking crazy, and that he just didn't know what to do."
"What?" I choked, my heart pounding in my chest, everything spinning, spinning, spinning.
"He's messed up. Marcus came by last night and told Emmett that he didn't know what to do, asked him to go by and check on him. So he did, but Edward didn't answer, and Emmett― I don't know; he had a bad feeling, so he kicked the door open, and Edward― there was blood all over his face, and he wasn't breathing."
He's not dead. I'd feel it. I know I would; my heart would have stopped with his.
"Where is he, Rose?" I gasped.
"Harborview. Edward still has you listed as his emergency contact; the doctors need you to make some-"
"Don't, Rose," I begged, my teeth gritted as I tried to hold everything together. "I can't. Just...my flight is about to board. I'll go straight to the hospital from the airport. Can you―" I swallowed thickly as I tried to blink away the spots dancing in front of my eyes. "Will you go there? I don't want him to be alone. Please?"
"Yeah, Bella, I will. Be safe."
"Thanks."
Boarding. Edward. Seat belts. Edward. Take off. Edward. Beverage service. Edward. Flight. Edward, Edward, Edward.
Drugs. He'd overdosed; she didn't have to come right out and say it; I knew. Everything suddenly made so much more sense: all the times he felt so disconnected, how he'd talk to me, but not really. Had he been high? Did he even remember that we'd talked?
Was what he said about Alice the truth?
Bile burned hot in the back of my throat. He wouldn't lie about that. Would he?
No.
Yes.
No.
It didn't matter. Not now. Not when he was in the hospital and he could―no. He would be fine. And even if...even if he lied, I knew now, living without him, it wasn't an option. I would have to deal with whatever obstacles we faced, but at least we'd have each other. We'd get through it, together.
The flight was painfully long. My face remained turned toward the window, hiding my tear-stained cheeks from prying eyes. By the time we'd landed and were finally off the plane, nerves had wrecked my body.
With shaky legs, I ran out of the airport, pushing and shoving people along the way. I didn't have time to be polite. I flagged down the first cab I saw and threw myself inside, slamming the door behind me.
"Harborview Medical. You can have an extra fifty if you break every speed limit there is to get me there."
The driver nodded and punched the gas pedal, the car lurching forward. I powered up my phone, my heart hammering against my chest as I watched message after message flash across my screen: Rose and Emmett asking when my flight got in. Esme telling me she loved me. And an unknown number with a Seattle area code that I just knew would end up being the hospital.
I clutched my phone and kept my eyes forward. I'd be at the hospital before an actual doctor made it to the phone. Besides, I doubted I could dial a number at the moment anyway.
Money in hand, I watched as the hospital came into view. I slung the bills over the seat and sprinted from the car before it came to a complete stop. I had one thought and one thought only―getting to Edward.
I pushed through the doors of the emergency room, my eyes immediately landing on a pacing Emmett. His head was down as he stared at the phone clasped in his hand. I barreled toward him, everything from the past eight months erased, replaced with the unyielding need to have my best friend wrap me in his arms and promise that everything was going be okay.
His head snapped up right before I collided into him, his wide red-rimmed eyes surprised for only a second before his arms wrapped around me, smothering me in his warmth. Salty ocean air and bon fire warmth engulfed me― drowning me in pinky promises and best friend love.
"Bella Bug." His voice was strained and so full of emotion I thought he would explode. "I'm so sorry."
I shook my head, burying my face in his chest and inhaling deeply. "No, not now. Nothing matters but Edward."
"I'm so sorry I didn't know. I was so mad at him after everything that happened. I should have called him; I should have checked in on him. Maybe I could have, I don't know, maybe I could have done...something."
"And maybe I could have stayed, maybe I could have trusted the last eight years of our lives and not given up so easily. But I did, and there isn't anything that can be done about that now; we have to focus on now― on Edward. Tell me, Emmett, please, what happened?"
"Marcus came over, told me how Edward had been fucked up on drugs," he hesitated before adding, "pretty much since you left."
I sucked in a sharp breath, my chest cracking as I thought about my excitement over a new job, my friendship with Esme and Carlisle―my relationship with Royce. All the while I was moving on with my life, Edward was drowning in us, in our lives together.
"Because I left?" I'm not sure he even heard me; I couldn't hear me over the roaring in my ears.
"Bella, you can't blame yourself."
"Tell me. I need to know."
"I went over, thinking I'd just yell at him, I don't know, but when he didn't answer the door, something dropped inside of me, fear, dread." He shook his head. "I don't know, but I had to get inside the apartment."
He sighed and pulled me further into the corner, away from prying eyes and a few people that I was more than certain were paps.
"Please don't make me go into detail about what I saw when I kicked his door in, Bella. I just can't; don't ask me to, for both our sakes."
I nodded. "He OD'd." It wasn't a question.
"Yeah."
"Coke?"
"And more."
"Fuck." My eyes stung and my throat burned. How did I not realize?
"Bella...he's not awake."
"What?" My chest hurt, the pounding of my heart bruising..
"It's bad, Bella. The doctors, they say he's had to have been on a binge for over a week. And no one has heard from him; he doesn't even look like Edward anymore."
"When was the last time Marcus saw him?" My throat was tight, my vision blurry.
"I'm not sure, last week, maybe five days?"
I felt sick. "Emmett, I need―where is the restroom?"
"There." He pointed toward the wall in the back.
I vomited before I could lift the lid, nothing but water and bile erupting from my stomach and spilling past my lips.
Was it the same day I'd told him about Royce? It had to be. I'd talked to him almost everyday until that conversation. Oh my God, this was my fault...he...he―I broke him.
I vomited again.
I staggered out of the bathroom and crossed the room to Emmett once more, my body floating and disconnected, a part of me breaking and pulling away. I needed to see Edward, I needed to see him now.
The urgency clenching in my chest terrified me; it felt like he was slipping away. I could still feel him, but it was distant― fading, even though I was closer now than I had been in the last eight months.
I was too fucking scared to consider what that meant.
"I need to see him. Now."
"I know, Bella Bug, but the doctors need to talk to you first, just for a minute. If it wasn't important, I wouldn't even tell you."
"Fine."
Emmett led me down the hall toward an older man in a white coat, his arms full of charts, his face weathered.
"This is Bella Swan, Edward Masen's emergency contact."
"Ms. Swan." He nodded. "I'm Dr. Crosby..."
I should have paid more attention to the doctors. I should have caught more than bits and pieces about kidney failure, severe liver damage, and a possible heart attack at the age of twenty four. But all I could see was the love of my life―the man that made my life worth living―lying motionless in a bed across the hall, looking nothing like the vibrant soul I remembered―nothing but a shell of skin and bones.
I broke all over again.
"Can I see him? I need to see him?" Tears streaked down my cheeks as I pleaded with the doctor to let me into the room to touch him, kiss him, tell him how fucking much I loved him.
"Only for a few minutes; he's about to be taken back for a few more tests."
I nodded, pushing off the wall I'd been leaning on for support and crossing the hall to his room. A puff of sterile air washed over my face as I entered the room, my steps faltering the closer I got.
His face was ashen, deep bruises rimmed his eyes, dried blood crusted under his nose and at the side of his mouth, his cheeks sunken.
This was all wrong, this wasn't how things were supposed to be―ever. This wasn't my Edward; it couldn't be. No, this was a mistake. I could prove it.
I yanked open my purse and pulled out a handful of tissues, wetting them before scrubbing at the blood on this stranger's face. I just had to get it off, show the doctors this was someone else, that my Edward was at home waiting for me, and he was going to wrap me in his arms and tell me he loved me― that forever really did mean forever.
But the moment my body touched his, I knew, because my heart sang and goose bumps raced across my skin. I smoothed his matted, dirty hair back as tears spilled from my face to his.
His body jerked, his arm snapping up and wrapping around mine like a vice, his eyes moving rapidly behind closed lids.
"Oh, baby." I fell onto his chest, my cheek pressed against his rapidly beating heart. Suddenly all of the monitors in the room started beeping, and people rushed into the room. A nurse tried to pull me back, but when I made to move, his hold tightened to the point of pain.
"Heart rate increasing; it's too much, too fast."
"Calm down, honey, I'm here, Edward, baby, please."
"Ma'am, you have to move." The nurse pulled harder, but it wasn't necessary― there was no resistance as his hand fell limply to the bed. Suddenly all of the frantic beeping stopped, replaced with a heart-shattering steady one.
I pushed my way to the other side of the bed, ignoring the demands and protests of the hospital staff. I grabbed his face and turned it toward me, my jaw clenched.
"Don't!" I spat, fear causing my body to surge with anger and desperation. "Don't you do that. You fight for me, damnit. I'm not ready, I'm not ready to lose you. You stop that right now."
He's coding! It's too much! NURSE, CODE BLUE!"
"Edward, no. No, baby, no. Stay with me, please.I'll stay with you forever; it's okay; I've got you. I love you."
Time stood still as they shocked him with paddles over and over again. The flatline of the heart monitor carving me into a million pieces. And then, then...
beep...beep...beep...
I backed away from the bed, my body colliding with the wall before falling to the floor, choking sobs wracking my body, but that beep― it was the sweetest sound I'd ever heard.
People came and went, timid and shy, afraid to look me in the eye. Their guilt for standing by and watching him fall apart more than evident by their slumped posture and drawn faces.
I never left his side: eating, sleeping and showering in the hospital, terrified that he would wake up and I wouldn't be there. I wanted to be the one he saw when he opened those beautiful green eyes.
Nine days passed before it finally happened.
His fingers twitched as the heart monitor slowly increased. My breath caught as his eyes began to flutter and his hand balled into a fist. I pressed the call button over and over again, fear and excitement exploding inside of me.
The nurse moved around him, checking his pulse, pulling open his eyes, writing down notes―silent. It was killing me.
"Is he waking up? Is he okay?"
She turned to speak just as his voice floated across the room.
"Bel-" His voice was raspy and low, but it didn't matter, because he was awake.
I darted around the nurse and grabbed his hand, swallowing the lump in my throat as I tried to answer him.
"Edward, I'm here, baby." I smoothed my hand over his face, shaking my head when his eyes started to close.
"No, baby, stay awake; let me see your eyes."
"Are you real?"
"I'm real. I'm here, baby." My words were thick, choked by the emotions swelling inside of me.
"You never let me touch you. Can I touch you?"
I couldn't hold back the tears any longer, my shoulders shaking with each shuddering breath. With trembling hands, I wrapped my fingers around both his wrists and lifted his hands to my face, placing one on either side.
My eyes fell shut when his grip tightened and his fingers twisted into my hair, pulling me forward.
"You can always touch me, baby."
He licked his lips, his tired eyes widening slightly, as a tiny flicker, a spark of something flashed in his eyes.
"You're really here. Oh, Bella."
I pressed our foreheads together, my lips ghosting over his as I spoke. "I'm so sorry, baby. I'm sorry I wasn't here. I'm sorry for so much. But I'll never leave again."
"Do you promise?" His voice broke as he struggled to speak.
"I promise. I love you."
"Forever?" He asked, his lips pressing against mine.
My entire body slumped into his when our lips connected. Two souls ripped apart, tortured and punished by love, deceit, lies, and life were finally together again. And as long as there were breaths in our bodies, they'd never be parted again.
"Forever."
A/N
*pulls on Kevlar for this A/N*
So I have a story to tell you guys. A few month ago, I'm sitting in a martini bar in downtown Knoxville with my friend Julie. And I'm hounding her to read GH and she is ADAMANT in her refusal. So I plied her with liquor and got her to do it anyway, kicking and screaming the entire way. I dragged her heart through the mud right along with you guys, even though I knew she didn't read this kind of story.
And in the end, she loved it, but the journey made her cry on more than one occasion. So when I sent her this chapter, and told her it was the last one, that Glass House was always meant to end here she nodded in understanding, only pouting just a little. Because for me, this story was about the lives of two people being ripped apart, but still somehow, against all odds, finding their way back to each other. And ending it here it lets the readers imagine their futures any way they want.
BUT, then I started thinking, fuck, don't my readers DESERVE more? Because I know how I see the future, and maybe you guys might like to have my vision of their future, too? I mean, you guys have been just, amazing. And so I told Julie, this may not be it brah, I may have more. And she shrugged and said, it's your story Liv, you do what feels right. So I let it go, but just like in the beginning of this story these characters started talking to me again. And they weren't ready to let go just yet. They had more to say. And so, I wrote more.
The reason for the Kevlar? Because my dear friend Julie has not read this addition. Why you ask? Because it's a surprise and I'm dedicating it to her for supporting me, putting up with my crazy, and for being an amazing friend in general. And she may just kill me for making her wait. Which is why the next chapter will come very soon, because when it's all said and done, I'd really rather not die. Just sayin.
Thanks to Perry and my lovely prereaders. I love y'all like whoa.
And thank all of you. Seriously, much love.
See ya soon!
~Liv