Sorry for not updating on this in ages, but my ideas are slowly running out… I do have some for future chapters, but I don't want to time-skip about three years while in the middle of Max's operation dilemma and blah blah blah.

Doctor Morrison found ten minutes every day to come and talk to Max. Max appreciated that, but there was nothing Morrison could do to change his mind about this operation.

He didn't want and he doubted he ever would.

Max was supposed to relax and not do anything too strenuous, but he was ADHD. He hated sitting in his bed all day. He just wanted to get up, get out, get a drink… Well, they were keeping tabs on him. He wasn't allowed out of his room except for the bathroom and even then, he had someone accompany him to check the bathroom for anything sharp or medical and then stand outside. Max hated those people. He knew they were doing their job, but when they came out with boxes of medication and some razors, he had to fight urges to grab the lot and lock himself in the bathroom.

So he had his room to pace all day. The window was locked and unbreakable- he had tried- and he was watched 24/7 via CCTV and hourly check-ups from the doctors and nurses.

Right now, Max was sitting on his bed, his fingers digging into a bottle of water. He was having a hard time without a proper, alcoholic drink and those nightmares had returned and a drink was all he craved. He was aware that he was shaking, but had long given up trying to calm down. He focused himself on the second hand of the clock, counting down the time until visiting time.

His parents would be here soon. They would bring comics, DVDs, CDs, books, chocolate and sweets. They would probably bring a sibling or two. Or worse- Charlie.

He was surprised to see, that within ten minutes of visiting time starting, Ava had turned up. She hadn't visited him before. He looked past her but his parents didn't walk in.

"I'm alone." She told him, sitting on the end of his bed, facing him and crossing her arms over her chest. "Your parents will be here later. They had to run an errand."

"Where's Phoenix?" A flicker of a smile tugged at the corners of her lips.

"She has a play-date with Charlie."

"Ooh… good luck to her then." Ava gave a tight smile. Max didn't say anything else, reaching back for his pillow. His doctor had said it was better to hit that whenever he felt like it. Now was one of those times. He wasn't sure why. Maybe it was that accusatory look she wore, those molten lava eyes studying him so intently, he felt as if he was being taken apart and placed under her strict examination. "I take it you're here to lecture me as well then?" She bunched her jaw, her hands curling into fists.

"Sort of." She replied through gritted teeth. "Then you said that and now I am."

"Ugh…" Max smacked the pillow against his face, wishing he would suffocate. Ava wouldn't let him. He had tried before in the middle of the night but two doctors had run in and wrestled the pillow from him. He had tried to fight back as well, but they had sedated him. "Ava, I've had dozens of lectures. I don't need another one."

"Why not?"

"You all say the same thing." He growled before putting on a mock imitation of everyone that had spoken to him. "There's so much to live for, Max. You don't have to do this, Max. Don't give up, Max. Don't do this, Max. Don't do that, Max. Everything will work out, Max." Max clenched his hands in the pillow, feeling the muscles in his body tensing. Ava's eyes hardened. "I don't care anymore. Why don't you lot get that?"

"Because we care." Max gave a dry, sarcastic laugh and she glared at him, her eyes stirring as if they hummed with lava. "Don't do that."

"Why?" He challenged.

"Why do you think we come back every day? Why do you think Tobias pulled you up? Why your dad bought you up from drowning yourself? You're a stubborn git, Max, but we're not going to let you go."

"Well, tough." He snapped. "You can lecture me all you like, I don't give a damn! They can shove this poxy operation and just leave me."

"So that's it?" He looked at her. Her eyes were still burning angrily, but there was a glimmer of something else. Max didn't determine what it was as she looked away. "You don't see yourself finishing college or finding someone to settle down with? No future whatsoever?"

"No."

"Have you thought about it?"

"No."

"Why?"

"'Cos it doesn't matter."

"It's your life, Max. It does matter."

"Not anymore it doesn't."

"So, did you have plans before all of this?" Max paused. Did he have plans before all of this? He couldn't remember.

He looked down at his hands, his eyes scanning over the scars on his wrists.

The more he thought about, the more he remembered. He had planned on finishing college with all these sports he had participated in. Hopefully he could have carried on with his sports from there and end up on a famous team or something.

As for a family of his own…

He thought of Tobias, who was settling down with Sophia while awaiting the arrival of the Little Twins.

Max could have a life like that. Wife, kids, nice home, nice car, possibly a dog. He liked dogs. He had always wanted a Dalmatian, but with six siblings, that wasn't an easy task.

But as he thought about it more, he realised he couldn't wait years for that. In the future, he could possibly have something to live for, but now? Yeah, they told him he still had family and friends that cared about him, but he couldn't do it. It had to stop. He couldn't go on like this; broken, pained and damaged. Besides, what woman would want him? He was an emotional mess, an alcoholic who couldn't fight his addiction and somebody who just wanted to end it all now. Great boyfriend material…

It took him a few seconds to realise Ava was watching him. He looked up at her, hardening his expression and remaining cold and unresponsive. She met his gaze similarly. Max didn't want to be like this, but it saved him from having a mental breakdown in front of her. He couldn't handle that, so how the hell would she?

Ava cleared her throat pointedly. "You didn't answer my question. Did you have plans before this?" Max looked away briefly before meeting her gaze steadily.

"No."

Ava left soon after asking about plans. She hadn't given him a hug goodbye like his parents did and made no promise of returning. He just got an icy 'see you later'.

Morrison came in after that.

"Who was she?"

"Friend."

"Just a friend?" Max nodded as the doctor pulled up his chair and sat backwards on it, like he usually did. He was blonde with warm brown eyes and lightly tanned skin. He had a bit of a sense of humour, very morbid sometimes, but Max didn't expect any less from a doctor. "What did she want?"

"Just to give me another lecture."

"You should listen to them." Max clenched his jaw in irritation. "Hey, I know, you hate lectures and you've got your mind made up, but they're right." Morrison looked at where Ava had been sitting. "What's that?" He nodded at something at the end of Max's bed. Max looked at him quizzically before shifting forward and picking up an iPod with headphones attached. He switched it on and scrolled through the albums. Ava had dropped it probably. There were albums by Nickelback, Shinedown and a few others. Max didn't know Ava's preferred music, but he seemed curious that it was similar to his own.

Morrison stayed for five minutes, only leaving once Max's parents had turned up.

"Mom, Ava left this."

"Oh no, that's for you." Max frowned slightly in confusion. "She said there were songs on there that she wanted you to listen to." Max looked at the iPod before shrugging and shoving it under his pillow.

"Bought you doughnuts." Percy smiled, holding up a white box. Max took it and opened it. There were cakes, doughnuts, giant cookies. "I might have had a cookie…" Percy admitted.

"I did try to get it off of him, but it had bitten it and I didn't think you'd appreciate Seaweed Brain slobber over it."

OK, that's all I've got at the moment. It's not brilliant 'cos I made it up on the spot, but I will try and plan the next few chapters, hopefully. Don't forget to vote!