This. Chapter. Is. So. Sad.

I'll kill myself over this *shot

You see, i'm in a very depressing state right now, which is why I keep on posting up sad and depressing twists. This is the problem with writers. Your mood affects what you write and how your plot twists up. T,T

I quickly gathered up all my things, hoping I didn't forget anything. Then I slung my bag on my shoulder, wishing it wasn't this heavy. It took a while for me to be able to get the apartment open, but now… I seriously need my baggage. Plus, I wonder why Alice isn't coming home yet? Is she THAT depressed? Um, what if… what if something weird happened between her and Kyouya? NO! KARYLLE, STOP THINKING ABOUT WEIRD THINGS! THAT IS WRONG!

Picking up a pen and paper, I scribbled down notes before Alice comes home. I'm starting to wonder if she'll ever come home. Every single time she has trouble with Kaoru, she'd run to Kyouya. Besides, she doesn't tell anyone except for me how close they are. So yeah, not even Tamaki knows the trust they put toward each other. If only you guys know their story, you'd expect she'd like Kyouya over Kaoru. Sadly, their friendship is always behind the scenes. Always hidden…

"There! Finished. I just hope Alice reads this. That girl doesn't know a thing about her surroundings when she's all gloomy." I sighed. I'm kind of worried for her health. She doesn't even eat anymore. She's too sad and affected. "Oh, Alice. I wonder if you'd be feeling better… I don't even know how to send you back to Canada…" I put the note and pen down on the table. "You came here in Japan… just because you thought I won't make it alone…"

I hurriedly went out the door. I hid the keys under the door mat, knowing Alice would find them there. Then I ran along the quiet streets, despite the fact that my bag had all the files inside. "Is the Embassy open at this hour?" I sighed, checking my watch. I hope they won't ask strange Japanese questions because my mind is too groggy and slow-processing right now to answer in "proper" Japanese.

I'm leaving so soon… so soon…

"I wonder if Karylle's home already…" I dreamily said, wondering who I'm actually talking to. Nonoko looked at me like I was in outer space. We've gotten a bit closer to each other now, knowing she's the same year level as me and she's Kyouya's cousin.

She started laughing. I stared at her, more dumbfounded than ever. "Just remembered something… anyways, Alice, are you Kyouya's best friend or something?" she asked. "Huh? Um, yes, I think. A female friend, at least. She doesn't usually talk to girls, huh?" I chuckled, knowing that the only person he would ever really trust is Tamaki. Nonoko nodded in agreement. "I, too, had a guy best friend. Though, we're not that close anymore…" she sighed. I just stared at her. "Kaoru was really close to me… but we had to stop whatever friendship we had because I was worried for the host club… especially for Hikaru." She continued.

I stared at her, really dumbfounded. I had no idea how to respond, I mean. Just who is this girl and why in the world is she connected in EVERYTHING? I mean, seriously. "…What? But… wait… WHAT?" I looked like I was disgusted, no, I was DISTURBED. Everything is revolving around a girl who doesn't know a thing about the situation right now. "… The twins almost fought because of me… I had to stay away…" she explained. My mouth was gaping widely at the shock. I was at a complete loss of words. "Did… did Kaoru want you to?" I asked, afraid of the answer. She shook her head. "There's no way he'd sacrifice our friendship. We only met at the host club when I went with the Flower Four. Then I met him. But, the thing is, he… he didn't do the brotherly love thing in front of me. I don't know why. It almost seemed like they treat me as a friend instead of a customer."

I felt a tinge of pain inside of me. I wanted to smile at her, but couldn't. "Excuse me for a while, okay?" I asked. Then I quickly ran inside their mansion, yelling. "KYOUYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

Geez! Why'd it have to rain at a time like this? Just when I've finally finished fixing my papers for my flight to Australia… oh, well. I guess I have to just run. Beside, my bag is waterproof so it's all going to be fine. Take a deep breath, Karylle. GEEZ, I DON'T WANNA GET SICK! Oh, never mind. I have to finish my work! One, two, three…

"STOP!"

I almost slipped when some random person shouted. Annoyed, I turned around, ready to give him a piece of my mind. "Look, pal! What's it to you if I run? I'm in a hurry here! Read the atmosphere for—" I stopped talking when I realized who it was. The bastard was smiling at me with his pearly white teeth. "… I've been looking for you! Seriously, I was going to tell you about this girl…" Hikaru told me, sheepishly rubbing the back of his head. I winced. This insensitive jerk, pretending he doesn't know that I like him and stuff… even daring to tell me about his new girl or whatever crap.

I crossed my arms, trying to keep my poise. "Who is this new girl who made you move on from Haruhi, then?" I asked, still trying to keep my voice from stuttering and cracking. He was still smiling, obviously too idiotic and dumb. "…Nonoko Ootori…" he whispered, his words barely audible. I wanted to turn my back and walk away, but no, I'll face this head-on. I need to. I have to. "You see… we met her in the host club before and I used to hate her… but… I don't what the hell happened that made my hatred turn into… this." He explained in a low voice. "And Karylle, you… you were always listening to me, and well, I was wondering if you could tell me what I'm actually feeling…" He pleaded, still oblivious about what I feel. I seriously want to punch him now. But wait… it would only show how weak I am. I nodded, even against my will, knowing that I should pretend, too. Besides, I'll be leaving soon. Who cares about what he'll feel?

"There's a thin line between love and hate, Hikaru."

As long as he would eventually like her, he wouldn't have to cry when I leave…

I couldn't stop myself from crying the hell out of me. Kyouya was covering his mouth in complete weakness. "So that's why…" he repeatedly said. I stood up, wiping every bit of tear sliding down my cheeks. "Yep. They fought, didn't they? Kaoru and Hikaru… at the time before me and Karylle came here, right? Because they almost became bitter towards each other, which is why they sought comfort from me and Karylle. That's right! We are just crying shoulders, after all! Kyouya, everything were lies!" I looked like I was about to have a nervous breakdown right there. Kyouya looked terribly troubled. "Yes. It was also Tamaki who begged for Nonoko to stop coming… and even though the first time you saw Hikaru and Kaoru, they were still always together, but the truth is, at that time they were already in a state where both would fall apart. They just chose not to mind their situation, because they know that Tamaki would become depressed. Their actions would affect the whole club. Hikaru hated Nonoko, but Kaoru treated her special. It was chaos for the twins. And I took responsibility because she is my cousin…" he looked terrible while he was explaining everything. "And when you girls came, I immediately thought that you could at least help them move on from everything. To make them fall in love with you, and for you to do the same… that would help, I thought. But no. Tamaki suffered trauma during that time with Nonoko. The twins got hurt, everyone got hurt. Worse, that girl is my cousin. Also Tamaki's close family friend. Everything was connected. It was hard to move on." He explained further, wishing silently that this would stop. I can tell he was also traumatized. The group almost fell apart, just because of one, clueless girl…

I swallowed my saliva because my throat felt really dry. "Continue." I ordered. Kyouya looked like he was about to break to pieces, but he decided to tell me more. "When she first met the twins, she immediately figured which is which. Her reason? She told them, it was because even if it's the first time, one can clearly see who they really are. Kaoru immediately got attached to her, but Hikaru… Hikaru thought Kaoru would leave him for her. That their bond would break just because they can finally be told apart. The twins almost lost their will to preserve what they have…" His voice faded. I nodded. "I see. Tamaki almost gave them up. What did Haruhi—" "Haruhi couldn't do anything. The fact that they're fighting because of a girl, she didn't know who to blame and what the actual source is."

I smiled. "It's not so bad to be a shoulder to cry on…" Kyouya looked at me, wide-eyed and pain-stricken. "No, you don't understand… Kaoru loves you." "What makes you so sure? Your information network?" I continued smiling. It's easier this way. Kyouya shook his head, went toward me and held my shoulders. "He told me himself." He assured me. I chuckled, held his face with my two hands. "So why didn't he tell me? Chase after me when I ran? Do something to fix this? He left me alone at the time I needed him the most…" I whispered. "You're the only one I've got left, Kyouya. You have to be strong. I just wish I could love you the same way I loved him, but… just be strong, okay? Stand up for this. You're great, you really are." I hugged him. He made no effort to push me away. "I'm strong, I know that. And you are, too. I believe it… Alice, don't waste your time trying to comfort me… face Kaoru. Face everything."

I nodded, then I let go of him. I grinned like an idiot, and he laughed. "Go now. You're free to go…" He patted my back. I looked at him teary-eyed, hesitating. "You're a great friend." I said before turning the doorknob. The door creaked as it opened slowly. Kyouya was watching me from afar, still smiling calmly. I took one step outside the room, then I glanced back at him.

"I love you." He mouthed before the door closed between us.

Rain was pouring down. Perfect for this moment.

There was a huge distance between me and him. He was staring at me, dumbfounded, hurt, and unable to make a move. I smiled half-heartedly at him. "Why?" He asked. "My arrival here is an accident. I already served my purpose here, to be your shoulder to cry on… so please, let me go now." I begged. He wanted to say something, but couldn't. "You're letting me go… for what? Karylle, I thought you'd be there for me when Kaoru isn't, or when no one else isn't..." He mumbled. No one could tell whether we were crying or not, because it was raining…

I sobbed, still trying hard to keep my poise and calm self. "Go back to Nonoko. I'll talk to Tamaki before I leave, okay? You'll be happy, Hikaru. You will…" I nodded, closing my eyes, breathing deeply. There was silence, except for the raindrops. "… Karylle… I… I'm sorry, I… everyone expected, didn't they? I shouldn't have been so close to you, too close to cause misunderstandings, I…" I held my hand in front, motioning for him to stop. "No more, Hikaru. Please…" I sounded like I was desperately trying to plead for my life. There was another long moment of pause between us. I can't bear this anymore… I can't…

"Karylle… I'm setting you free…"