Chapter twenty-five: What's in a name?
"Wait" she said, grasping her hand around his arm and forcing him to turn around and face her, he looked at her puzzled – not so silently wondering why she had stopped them from entering their home
"Finally" he said to break her silence, confusing her more "Let's take him back, how can we love something with that nose?" he smirked as Mac looked on at him insulted
"You said he had my nose" she sulked "And your Daddy didn't mean that bub" she whispered down to the baby sleeping in the capsule in Dick's hands "He has your big ears, do you want him to hear you and develop a complex?"
"My ears are in perfect proportion to my face, the guy at the mall told me so when I got my head shots taken that one time" he was lying, he had definitely had his head shots taken more than once – he was vain, it was bound to happen – he just hoped that she would never come across the box that held them all, that was humiliation to an extreme "You'll grow into them too" he directed his gaze and conversation down "And tell me this Mackenzie, what happens to your complex when you still don't have a name?"
"I'll know it when I hear it"
"Why are you standing here?" it all of a sudden sprung to him that they were still standing on the doorstep
"I told you to wait" instead of filling the silence this time he let her go "This is it, this is the first time we are going to go through this door as a family of three – I know its overly sentimental and probably is just spurred on by the hormones still surging around my body – but this is a momentous occasion" he shut her up with a kiss
"Welcome to the rest of your life Cindy Mackenzie" he went to put his hand on the door knob and then stopped – forcing Mac to run into the back of him
"Ow" she scolded as he turned around "What are you doing?"
"I think I can hear talking" he stepped back, Mac stepped forwards and put her ear against the door "Are we being robbed?"
"I'm sorry" he looked at her puzzled, "It's my family, I could recognises mums cackle anywhere. I know they were coming to pick up Beasley but they left the hospital hours before we did"
"Let's just go in, this baby is heavy," Dick complained as Mac opened the door
"There they are" Natalie swarmed at the door, from the moment her first grandson was born she was smitten, her eyes never leaving him – for awhile Mac thought that those protective eyes were her mother making sure that it was still the same baby, especially after she had found a little black dot on his foot while getting him dressed – but she realised that the look was for the most part one of absolute obsession and adoration. She loved it but it was going to be overwhelming. The baby was already out of the capsule in Dick's arms and into hers "Hello beautiful boy"
"I thought that you guys were going home?" she tried to discretely question in the nicest possible way, Dick laughed as he put the capsule down and walked towards the living room where Sam and Ryan were standing
"Well we were picking up Beasley" the dog with the droopy tongue sticking out in what appeared to be a smile "And we decided that you just wanted to tidy the place up a little so you would all be comfortable" how could someone be so overbearing and cute at the same time – she had a feeling in her stomach that this was going to be an occurring theme for the rest of their lives.
"Does he have a name yet?" Ryan asked, only half of his attention on the small huddle in the doorway and the rest of it was on the game that was playing over the television – clearly when their mum had used the word 'we', she actually meant 'she' had and that the boys had helped simply by staying out of the way "How about Duke?" he said as Natalie took him over to the couch
"Great now they are getting comfortable" Mac whispered over to Dick – who was finding the whole situation hilarious "yeah keep laughing, you didn't just have a baby with the head circumference of a small to moderate watermelon shoot out of you" she moved over to her family
"I kind of…" pre-empting his response, Mac gave him a look, which he instantly recognised and used as a hint to stop his sentence right there
"What about Caspian? That's a cool guy name" Sam looked intently at his grandson "What do you reckon buddy, you kind of look like a Caspian" the baby squirmed and spit up
"I don't think he likes it" Natalie laughed
"It's cruel to name your child Caspian Casablancas" Mac added
"Or buddy?"
"Clearly mum named us!" Ryan joked "Imagine what would've happened if it was up to dad, I would have been Caspian and you would've been?"
"Esmeralda" Natalie said after a moment of silence, which was then filled with laughter "And actually you were never going to be Caspian, you were going to be Floyd if your dad had his way"
"And you would've been the coolest kids in the neighbourhood" he was dead serious "how about…" Mac realised that they were never going to leave, she nudged Dick and gave him the 'please make them leave' look but his returning look and gestures indicated that he was going to be no help, so she did the most over the top yawn of her life – loud enough that everyone turned around
"Oh goodness" Natalie was flustered now "What are we doing? You must be exhausted" Mac nodded as Natalie kissed the babies head one more time before handing the little curled up baby back to Dick "Let's leave these kids to get used to their kid" once she finally rustled up the Mackenzie boys, they all lined up to kiss her goodbye, Natalie was last "If you need ANYTHING, you call me and I will speed to get to you" Mac seriously doubted it, her mum always drove incredibly slowly – to the point that once Mac and Ryan decided that walking ten blocks to school would be quicker.
"They are gone" Mac's tired face smiled as the door shut behind them "Now it's just us" she walked over to hey boys
"We do need to think of a name" he pulled her in with an arm "Since we decided that his last name would Casablancas, maybe his first name could be Mack?"
"But that's my name?"
"Right, I guess that might get confusing"
"Do you have any close male relatives with names that suit this face?"
"Give me time to think about it" he said it with a half hearted laugh, as Mac's stomach sunk – probably wasn't a good idea to mention close male relatives when one was locked up in jail and the other she couldn't bear to think about, she stood on this tips of her toes and kissed him "But right now you should rest, I think that your supposed to sleep when the baby sleeps and look at this kid – he is out of it"
"I think we should just isolate ourselves for a couple of days" she was practically falling asleep on his shoulder "no outside world"
"Sounds like a plan" he said as he slowly lead her to their bedroom
X-x-x-x-x-x
Dick crawled into bed, and the second that he lay down he was a magnet – Mac rolled over to find him. He scrunched his face, between the two of them they had barely had eight hours sleep in the last forty-eight hours, he had just managed to get the baby to sleep and the only thing that was keeping his eyes open as he rocked the tiny fussy baby was that every time he rocked Mac was getting to sleep. So when he was getting into bed, his main objective was to not wake her up, her eyes were still closed but he knew she was semi-conscious, and all of a sudden his mouth was open and he couldn't stop the words coming out "I think I'm going to go see my dad" he had been thinking about it for days now and it was good to get it off his chest. Mac didn't respond, she really didn't know how to "You don't think that I should"
"I didn't say anything" his hand was wrapped around hers, her body warmth made him feel so content, he laughed
"Your body tensed and when you tense up you pull this face" Mac turned around to look at him "That face" he pointed to her "and it's your biting your tongue face"
"I just didn't know that it was something you were interested in doing" she wasn't lying, he hadn't mentioned his dad since the night of Evelyn's fantastic-ly bad man landing on the moon school concert. She knew that he had given an ultrasound picture to his dad, not because he told her but because he had left with an ultrasound picture and not returned with it. But he had never mentioned it again, and she really didn't want to pry
"I didn't either." He gulped "Ever since we had a son, it's just been sitting in the back of my mind."
"Tell me about it" Mac gently pursued his thoughts
"I guess I don't need to tell you this because you probably already know, but Richard Senior lacked empathy, I know for years that I followed in those footsteps but I don't want my son to ever think the same of me. You and that baby boy are my family, Logan and Veronica and their kids are my family, heck Wallace is like a distant cousin and slowly working up the ranks. But if I can't show empathy to my dad – even if he doesn't deserve it – what am I teaching our son?"
"That sometimes people do horrible things and we don't let them in our lives" Dick smiled down at her
"He is my dad" he shrugged his shoulders
"You do know that I will support whatever you do right?" he nodded as they maintained intense eye contact "Do you want us to come?"
"I still don't trust him, not as far as I can throw him, so I think it should just be me this time. Also I don't think babies first outing should be to a prison. But you have no idea how much it means to me"
"I love you" her eyes were closed again, a small smile on her face as she snuggled tighter into his side
"I love you more" he responded as she drifted off to sleep
X-x-x-x-x-x
"You must have a baby by now, unless Cindy is as late having your baby as your mother was with you" Dick didn't know how to respond when Richard Snr seemed to be sincere; it still threw him a little.
"A little boy" he said pulling a photo out of his pocket and passing it to his father – who stared longingly at it as Dick wondered what he was thinking
"He is beautiful" Richard Snr looked up at his son, Dick could've sworn that there was a tear in his fathers eye – but that couldn't be true because Casablancas men didn't cry, hadn't that been the message that they taunted Cassidy with when he skinned his knee of threw a tantrum. Every time that he was in his fathers presence, thoughts of his little brother filled his mind, not the fun ones that he remembered with a feint smile and a small chuckle of sadness, but the horrible ones, the ones that used to keep him up at night, the ones that sent him spiralling into a vat of sadness with no way of ever getting out. Those thoughts were fewer these days, while they happened on the anniversary of his brothers death, the happiness and content feelings that spread through his life now dulled the stabbing pain which he was sure would kill it some day. But without fail, these thoughts would come flooding back when he was face to face with his father – now accompanied by pangs of guilt, where he wondered what his brother would think of the family situation that he found himself in now – the family situation that a small part of his head argued belonged to Cassidy, if his life hadn't been so difficult and if he hadn't done the horrendous things that stained his last years of life in Neptune. "He has the Casablancas chin" Dick burrowed his eyebrows "It's a very prominent chin. Does he have a name?"
"Not yet, Mac and I are still trying to work out something that suits him. She wants something that is a family name but I cant think of anything"
"How is your mother dealing with being a grandmother?" there was always a hint of distain when Richard Snr talked about the woman who had left him with two children and no clue what to do, Dick wasn't sure if anyone else would've noticed this tone, but he certainly could. Maybe it was because he could distinctively remember her leaving and he recognised the tone from the one he used when he spoke of Betina.
"She sent a nice bouquet of flowers and a rattle, but she is away in the Swiss mountains right now so at this rate she wont see the baby till its twenty two but that's okay, she doesn't really know how to interact with things that cant have a full conversation about expensive imported wine" Richard Snr let out a laugh, and Dick smiled. It was nice getting some stuff out about her, he didn't know why but while he had such a strong hatred for how his mother had treated him – disappearing when he needed her the most – he was still protective of what other people thought of her, not wanting to give them ammunition to talk more or feel sorry for him. Logan already hated her so much, his best friend tried to hide it but he got this look about him when Dick mentioned her, he would call him until he picked up on nights when he knew that Betina was in town – and was known to turn up when the phone wasn't answered, he appreciated the six pack that Logan would bring with him, but not the idea that his friend was expecting a breakdown at any minute. With his dad, he knew that the hate was already developed, his was the parent that had to stick around, the one who had to fork out extra cash to make sure there was always someone with his boys – and even then it turned out shit. He already knew that his dad had a deep resentment for his mother for leaving him with them, because there was a part of him that blamed Betina and the exact moment she walked out the door for his shoddy parenting and for everything that happened to their boys afterwards.
"At least she is consistent" Dick watched as Richard Senior's face went from a smile to a considered look as his gaze fell back to the photo that sat before him "My cell neighbour has twelve grandkids he wont shut up about, I think I kind of get why he finds them so interesting" he was silent for a moment, they both were "Could I meet him?"
"I don't know dad" Dick said with a sigh "Even if I thought that it was a good idea, I'd have to talk to Mac" Richard Snr looked a little hurt, but he couldn't be, it was his own fault he was in here and he hadn't exactly been a model father that he would be willing to jump through hoops for "Speaking of, I have to go" he said standing up from the table and waving over to the prison guard
"James"
"What?" Dick said turning around
"James was your great grandpa's name, he was the jolliest man in the world, the most kind and considerate – clearly that gene skipped a couple of generations but that chin definitely continued"
X-x-x-x-x-x
"AUNTY MAC" Evie Echolls came running into the room like a banshee followed by a line of shushing "Aunty Mac" she whispered as she walked towards the living room to where Mac was sitting with the baby in her arms
"Hello" she said with a smile as the little girl climbed up next to her, the girls hadn't met the baby yet, they had decided that the kids were a little too rambunctious for the hospital
"This present is for the baby" the little girl showed the box before pulling it into her lap and beginning to rip it open
"Evelyn that isn't yours to open" Veronica sternly
"What?" she turned to face her mum "His fingers are too little, I'm just helping"
"Where's Dick?" Logan asked after kissing Mac on the forehead and placing their youngest daughter on the ground, the bromance was clearly still alive
"He has gone to visit Richard Snr" Mac said as the two shared a look
"Eve tell Mac what you think she should name the baby" Veronica noticed the worry in both her partner and her best friends eyes and wanted to switch the attention, knowing full well no conversation would soothe either of them until Dick walked back through the doors unscathed
"I like Vacuum" Mac stifled laughter "It's really pretty"
"Vacuum Casablancas sounds perfect" Dick said as he walked through the door with a box from the bakery under his arm and Wallace and a lady walking behind him
"It's beautiful, but I think you should save that for when you have a baby" she said as Veronica lifted the baby out of Mac's arms "Hey Wallace" she said as she made her way over to the pastry's "And special lady friend?" she felt horrible that she had only just noticed the woman's presence, Veronica and Mac shared a look – through serious investigations they found out exactly who this lady was, and Wallace knew but they didn't want to make it awkward for this new person entering their group
"This is Claire" he said with a wide smile, her hand gripped in his, this was the first official meeting
"HI" everyone in the room chimed back as Mac dragged Dick out onto the deck
"You okay?" she asked after she pulled away from the kiss he instigated as they made it outdoors
"I'm fine" she gave him a questioning look "I promise you Macster, all is good in the hood." She looked up at him for a moment "Noah James"
"What?"
"Noah James Mackenzie Casablancas. That's his name."
"That's his name" Mac smiled "I thought we weren't allowed to name him after a Ryan Gosling character?"
"I guess I can make an exception, but the next one we are steering far away from names associated with Ryan Goslings chiselled jaw"
"Slow down sparky, lets get through a week of having this one first"
To be continued