The Apology
Because I'm super late again.
…
I say I'll post a thing "tomorrow" on like Monday, then clock out on Saturday. Sorry, guys. Anyway, here's the revision and the 'things' I promised. Let's just say, it's been a rough week and the revision took like four times longer than I thought would. But, I'm glad to be able to finally close this sucker out.
The Opening Closing Notes
Everything below is completely optional to read, ignore at will. Or better yet, skim the bottom part, then go to the next chapter.
…
It's finally over. It took almost 100,000 words, but we made it. Phew.
If you've made it this far, you're probably aware that I can certainly ramble endlessly if given the option. And here's the part where I give myself the option! And I don't have to hold back because of spoilers, since you've assumably already read the whole thing at this point.
The Acknowledgements
High fives to all.
…
First off, I'd like to thank all of my wonderful readers. There's been more of you than I had been expecting, so that's been pretty cool. It's amazing that even after twenty years, the Sailor Moon fanbase is still alive and out there. And in so many different countries too, wow.
Extra thanks to those of you who Followed, even though my normally predictable update schedule probably made it a moot point. And internet hugs those of you who Favorited. Being Favorited is pretty rad, I won't lie.
And most importantly, thanks to everybody who took the time to Review. I looked forward to posting each week because of you guys. You definitely influenced some of the revisions I made week by week (mostly I added MOAR VIOLENCE).
Special Props to:
x-Anon-T, Vchanny, PrincessSerenity101 - for being my A-List commenters for the last several months. Gold star stickers to the lot of you, you're my favsies.
The Revision
Since mistakes sometimes I accidentally a word.
…
I've done one final sweep of the whole story and have uploaded it along with this last update. Every chapter is uploaded fresh and contains my attempt at fixing the remaining grammatical errors I've let slip by along the way, with minor revisions and formatting changes. There were A LOT of them and frankly it took me forever to finally finish grammar nazi-ing myself. I hope to have gotten all of them, but if I missed some errors, we'll just have to let it ride because I AM NOT reading this whole damn thing again. I've read through it way too many times and it's just friggin long.
I'm going refrain from rewriting sections for the millionth time. Stylistically, I wish I would have done certain parts differently, but it's time for me to finally just let it be and move onto something new. It's not perfect, I know, but I think I did an decent job for an amateur. I'll do better next time, pinky swear.
Because each chapter is replaced, the author's notes and review responses at the end are now gone. I was debating whether or not to copy/paste them back in, but ultimately decided that leaving them out would serve the story as a whole better. As much as I loved the silly banter at the bottom, I'd rather leave the story behind as one solid chunk that doesn't break voice. Also, it was enough of pain dealing with FFnet's Horizontal Line Breaks, uploading and formatting, thus copy/pasting my stupid rants at the end would have been more work. So there's a lazy reason too.
But I'll reiterate some of the points I've made in the past, as well as address a few questions in this rather lengthy closing section.
The Writing
For those curious about the process (or lack thereof).
…
I'd been working on this story for quite some time. It's been on my hard drive for…I don't even remember how many years, painfully unfinished. I'd work on it some, lose interest and forget about it for a couple of months, then pick it up again when the mood struck. Luckily, I hadn't posted any of it, because as a fanfic reader, waiting for Works in Progress for too long sucks. Plus, my first drafts of scenes were usually crap and needed heavy reworking - so I would have been too embarrassed to show it anyway.
At some point, when I was finally out of college and comfortable in my full time job, I rekindled my interest in Sailor Moon. The thriving tumblr community made Sailor Moon really fun for me again. I had more time and inspiration, so I finally finished this thing I never actually expected myself to complete and post.
So the whole thing was one big chunk of story that needed some heavy editing. My style kept changing, my writing kept wanting to be different, so I revised, and then revised again, and again…divided it into chapters and then realized, oh shit it's actually done.
I'm saying all this because the steady 'every Monday' updates had raised some questions about how the hell I managed to pull off writing a 3000+ word chapter every week. The answer is: I totally didn't. There was never a writing schedule or strict outline. What I actually did once a week was try and spruce up each individual chapter, proof it, write an author's note end cap, and do review responses.
If you're a writer and have been curious about my methodology, there it is - in all its sloppy, undisciplined glory. If I could pull this off, you can too. And if you're persistent and have good ideas, you'll do way better (and faster) than I.
The Ship
A lengthy analysis on what was I smoking.
…
Who the hell ships Rei and Mako? Practically nobody. I didn't even consider the possibility, until I read a Nutzoide's 'Fallen Stars' series. If you haven't read it, you might like it. It's got Rei/Mako, Ami/Haruka (even weirder, but it worked), featuring Minako being awesome on the side.
Anywho, I tried finding another Rei/Mako fic because they were kind of a fun new pairing. The results were scarce. I wasn't surprised by this. And the ones I did read…well…let's say I didn't care for the characterizations. So I gave a whirl myself.
I had a couple of main sticking points from beginning to end.
1. They had to FALL in love. (It's easy to start with the main characters pining for each other then confessing, but I wanted there to be some amount of justification to the attraction.)
2. They had to stay close to character. (None of the 'Mako's been secretly gay this whole time' copouts.)
3. No sex after the first kiss. (Minako would, because Minako. Ami might, depending on how frustrated she's been. But Rei/Mako? Didn't see it.)
So, how was I going to help two stubborn, headstrong gals fall for each other? Well, first there needed to be a catalyst that both shatters the status quo and forces them to spend a lot more time together alone. Youma/Losing Powers/Almost Dying/Needing Protection ended up fitting that bill.
Makoto doesn't know how to deal with her fear of death and failure in a constructive way. Rei doesn't know how to help her. Assumably, they've never been 'forced' to occupy the same space like that. When Mako has problems, she most likely goes to Ami, or just bottles up her frustrations by herself. Those two options aren't as easy to select, with Rei constantly trying to assert her help. Mako gives in to the situation grudgingly and slowly begins learning along the way that maybe she doesn't have to be alone.
As with any live-in situation, the ladies get to know each other better. It's an inevitability that things change, whether it be for better or worse. In this case, they begin to confide in each other, and relate a lot more than they expected. A new kind of bond forms and they both start to rely and draw strength from the other.
Rei helps to ground Makoto's restlessness, and Makoto helps Rei find the courage to face her demons.
And you know, then fluff and shit happens. You read it. Rei didn't kill Mako for wasting the shrine with a tree, so Mako got her flowers. Yadda yadda.
There are a lot of different aspects about their potential as a couple that I like.
I've said this once in a review reply, but they're gone now, so I'll repeat it. Rei's more of a taker and Makoto's more a giver.
Rei pursued Mamoru very openly and walked all over Yuuichirou most days. She had TA Girl's School wrapped around her finger. She can be very aggressive when she wants to be.
Makoto can be fairly relentless as well, but she uses different tactics to gain affection. She cleans and cooks for Motoki, she beats Zoisite up for Crane Game Joe, she tries to explain to Seijuurou that when people like somebody else - they try to do things for them.
Makoto will readily shower the object of her affection with gifts and gestures, which is perfect for Rei because she loves the attention. When it comes to intimacy though, Rei steers. She's possessive as well as aggressive. She can own Makoto in an instant because the latter is easily disarmed (see: Mischa, Tiger's Eye.)
They can help mellow each other's rougher edges as well. Rei has a harder time staying mad around Makoto's earnest wholeheartedness, and the more negative aspects of Makoto's overzealousness (i.e. trying to get herself killed) are reigned in through Rei's demanding reprimands.
Basically, I've managed to develop all these Rei/Mako feels. Yes, Mako works with Ami very well and Minako brings out something special in Rei, but GUISE SRSLY - Rei/Mako is such an awesome crack pairing. The dynamic is so vastly unexplored, which makes it so interesting sometimes.
I wanted to write them some fluff and I did. And yet somehow I always bounced back to "Oh shit, we're gonna die" land. Which brings us to the youma section...
The Nemeses
Because some of you were mainly here to watch the Senshi punch things.
…
The working title of this story was: Civilians. The premise being, each of the girls has to fight a youma as a civilian and win.
I hadn't planned the Senshi plot to be this important to the story. It started off as a catalyst for Rei/Mako. Simple enough, right?
The initial ideas were:
Mako electrocutes a youma somehow.
Ami kills one with Science/Brainpower.
Minako uses metal somehow (maybe she crushes it with heavy machinery or something)
Rei shoots a youma with an arrow.
Those were the basic ideas. They turned into violent crucibles and I have no regrets about highlighting individual Senshi BAMFnesses. And eventually, I realized I had probably had to come up with some sort of explanation for why this was happening.
Okay, so maybe Luna and Artemis were training/testing them. But for what?
I muddled through several scenarios. Maybe demons are crawling out of the bowels of Chaos. Or perhaps it's something with the Crystal Points and the first emergence of the regular Tokyo Joe who would become the Wiseman. I even tried Usagi is pregnant and everybody's new powers are supposed to cause the Great Crystal Tokyo Freeze….Needless to say, I scrapped a whole lot of scenes before settling on monster infected Nemesis.
Here's my headlogic on Nemesis:
Back in the Silver Millennium days, it was a regular planet, just beyond Pluto. Civilizations lived there and humans thrived. Then, Chaos rolls into town. Nemesis bears the brunt of the evil because it's first.
A plague spreads and humans start turning into youma. The armies can't fight it because they're turning too. The Warlocks and Wisemen are trying to find a cure, but are either killed or transformed themselves. The last remaining Wiseman tries to send an SOS message to Queen Serenity before killing himself.
The message doesn't make it, and he doesn't end up dying.
Chaos moves to other planets, and Beryl's End of Days occurs. Nemesis is forgotten and lost to time.
The feral youma on Nemesis are left to themselves. They breed through generations and the strongest survive the test of ages.
Dark energy pools together, forming the Black Moon. In the heart of it, lies the last Wiseman. He, too, is now driven by a base need to collect magical energies.
Sailor Pluto's presence on Nemesis does not go unnoticed. She makes portals to Earth, revealing the path to life on another world. These portals are emulated by the Black Moon, using youma to scout the way.
The Senshi reveal themselves to be much more than the Wiseman bargained for. They would have killed him with their combined power, if not for Sailor Moon's purification.
Nemesis is left behind an empty world, littered with gemstones and devoid of life.
And that's how Death Phantom finds it when banished there by Neo Queen Serenity in the far future. He dons the guise of a Wiseman and takes up the symbol of the Black Moon. He seduces a clan of exiles and the rest is Sailor Moon R.
It could be a fic on its own, but I probably ain't writing it. You can though, go ahead. Steal those ideas, I don't mind at all.
The Others
In which I apologize for my intentional plot holes.
…
"Write something that *you* would want to read."
That's what I was doing. Hence the Rei/Mako thing. And hence the Inner Senshi.
I don't read much stuff about the Outers. They've never been my favorites. I like them fine enough, don't get me wrong. They're not bad characters, it's just that I don't care about them nearly as much as I love the Inners.
Thus, they've been conveniently out of town this whole time. It was a total cop out, I know. But it's just not their fic.
Plus, I didn't know them as well at the time to feel like I would be writing them with enough sincerity. If I wasn't going to write them well or planned to give them any spotlight at all, they might as well have been out of town.
You probably have noticed that Mamoru got the same treatment. He showed up, said maybe two lines, and then faded into the background. Again, it's not out of resentment. It's just that I didn't have a storyline to give him. He and Usagi have their fics and have their entire series of screen time, so I wasn't too torn up about it.
I actually made an attempt to shove Haruka and Michiru into the story. They showed up for Rei's birthday going, "Hay guise, what'd we miss?" Obviously, those scenes didn't pan out and I'm glad they didn't. Because tossing them in at the last minute like that not only lacked finesse, it was disingenuous.
It's hard to divide a story amongst such a large cast of characters. I regret not being able to do more with Ami and Usagi, but ultimately, it was Rei and Mako's fic.
But, I'm trying to include everybody in my future writings. I'm better with Haruka and Michiru than I was before. I've thought more about them and their motivations, so I think I can handle giving them important subplots this next time around. I'm still figuring out Hotaru, but she'll do something great, I'm sure.
Which leads me the next section...
The Next Up
What's done, what's potential, and what I'm working on right now.
…
I've alluded several times to a SilMil fic I've been trying to write at the moment, but first let me tell you more about the story I DO have finished.
One day, I was having particularly strong Mako/Mina feels, so I decided to start writing them. I probably read one of their better fanfics and wanted to do one too.
Although I was probably intending a one shot or something rather simple at the time, I ended up clocking out with fourteen chapters.
I wrote it in tandem with What We've Lost. Whenever I got stuck or couldn't take Rei or Mako's angsty angst, but still wanted to write, I'd work on this one.
Compared to What We've Lost, it is rather simple. Not an AU, but no Senshi action. It's a romantic comedy because sometimes I just needed to write something happy and lighthearted.
Usagi abuses the disguise pen for spy missions. Minako dubs Rei as her wingwoman against her will. Ami advises Makoto to run away before it's too late.
So next next Monday (I'm gonna take a week off before starting up again), it's the start of my Mako/Mina side project. Hope to see you there.
…
Additionally, if I feel like writing something in the same continuum as What We've Lost, I'll toss up a couple unrelated one shots. This could be anything from Minako revenge dousing Artemis with a spray bottle, to Rei/Mako fluff, to a random battle scene. I don't have a strict sequel planned, so it'll be a series of shorts. If you have a request, I'll take prompts under consideration.
…
Back on the subject of the SilMil fic, it's going to be rather long and I have no regrets on that. Progress is slow going at the moment, but I'm hopeful. I've planned it to be a trilogy and I'm not going to release any chapters, until I finish the first book at the very least.
The story will focus on each Senshi as a Princess of her respective planet - beginning before they've even heard the word "Senshi." Various catalysts will cause their journeys to intersect and the looming threat will bind them together.
As I craft this story, I encourage you to PM me your suggestions, ideas, headcanons, likes, dislikes, feels, SilMil fic recommendations, etc. The more I talk about the subject and banter about interplanetary politics, the more likely I am to finish quicker.
To reiterate, the Outers and Endymion will have featured roles.
That being said, the next chapter in this Story Group will contain a "trailer" of what I've got so far. It will be subject to revision of course, but hey just for fun, enjoy the preview of what's to come.
..
..
..
Thanks again for your support, folks. It's been a fun several months, and I'm sincerely glad to have shared with you.