Rose's shower might have taken five minutes, but everything else that happened afterwards – the blow dryer and who knows what else – was another twenty. Part of me felt like a teenager again, waiting for my sisters to finish getting ready so I could finally have my turn in the bathroom. I was going to tease her about it, like I had done with my sisters, but the moment she stepped out in that dress I was rendered speechless. Not just speechless – every single thought from my mind had been wiped away until only one thing remained. Rose, in a dress, smiling at me.

"All yours, Comrade. Don't worry, I left some hot water."

She bumped my arm playfully as she passed, and I winced. I didn't need hot water. A cold shower, however...

Hot, cold, or somewhere in between, the shower ended up feeling incredible. Like Rose, I had been a mess when we finally arrived at the Mastranos'. My skin might not have been torn up quite as much as hers thanks to some more durable clothing, but looking in the mirror it was clear that I had seen better days. I rubbed at my eyes before tracing the gradually darkening circles underneath them. I tried to remember the last time I had really slept and came up short. I had barely laid down before Sonya and Robert had started fighting in her backyard, and the night before that had just been nightmare after nightmare until it was less exhausting to stay awake rather than try to fall asleep again. Granted, most nights had at least one nightmare nowadays, but trying to sleep after the incident in the alley had been particularly brutal.

With a slow roll of my shoulders, I pulled back my damp hair and fell into a yawn. I needed sleep – real sleep – soon.

John was passing by in the hall when I opened the bathroom door. He paused as he saw me but said nothing. Downstairs, I could still hear the others chatting.

"Thank you again for letting us stay. We really do appreciate it," I said, hoping to extend a small olive branch.

He didn't reply for a moment and I felt those small hairs on the back of my neck start to rise again. "Anything for my girls." Without preamble, he turned and walked into the master bedroom at the end of the hall.

I slipped through the slightly ajar door into the room where I had left Rose. "Rose? I have a bad feeling about–" My words stopped cold as I spotted Rose sitting on the bed with eyes closed and fists balling the sheets in a tight grip. Her breath came in short, stilled pants, practically hyperventilating, while her face twisted into a grimace of sheer panic. I was at her side in an instant.

"Rose!" I shook her but her breath only grew quicker. Too much more of this and she was liable to faint just from lack of adequate oxygen. Too much more of this and I was liable to start panicking alongside her. I gripped her shoulders again, probably tight enough to bruise, and shook her again. "Rose!"

Her eyes finally opened but the panic didn't fade.

"Rose, what's wrong? Are you okay?"

"No!" She pushed me aside and bolted for the door. "I have to– I have to go back to Court. Now. Lissa's in danger. She needs me."

"Rose." I grabbed her arm just before she reached the doorknob, but she continued to fight me until she heard her name again. "Roza, slow down. Tell me what happened."

"They were coming back from seeing someone about finding the real killer and this guy, he just came at her with a knife. He was a Moroi. He was waiting for her and the moment he saw her he just rushed them."

"You said 'they.' Who was with her?" My own heart sped up as the itch to join the fray and protect like I had been trained to do since childhood kicked in. Even from hundreds of miles away, those instincts snapped into place. The fact that it was Lissa in trouble made the pull that much stronger.

"Christian, Adrian, and Eddie. Eddie was there in time but…" Her voice trailed off and I could see something else fill her eyes. Not panic now, but dread. The sort of dread that came with witnessing something that could never be undone – like the death of another friend. "He killed him."

"Who?" There were far too many 'him's' in this picture. "Eddie? The man? Christian? Adrian? Who?"

She shook her head. "The man. Eddie killed the man, whoever he was."

A wave of relief rushed over me and I whispered a quick "Thank God," under my breath.

"Thank God?" Rose looked at me indignantly. "Someone tried to kill her, Dimitri! And I wasn't there!"

"But Eddie was," I reassured her and squeezed her shoulder gently. "She's okay. She's alive." The moment I let her go, she fell against the wall. Her legs shook under her own weight and fears, and for a moment I considered picking her up just so she wouldn't have to worry about standing on her own for a little while.

"And now he's in trouble." That earlier dread was back again and her balance shifted once more as emotions pulled her down a bit further. "Those guardians were pissed –"

"Only because they don't know the whole story. They see a dead body and a weapon, that's it. Once they get facts and testimonies, everything will be okay. Eddie saved a Moroi. It's his job."

"But he killed another Moroi to do it. We're not supposed to do that." I could almost see her world shift on its axis. I could almost feel it. Killing a Moroi was unimaginable to her and if a jury had been able to see her face at that very moment, they would have proclaimed her innocence. They would have known without a doubt that Rose could never have killed Queen Tatiana simply because killing a Moroi, even one that she supposedly hated, was simply inconceivable.

"This wasn't a normal situation." It was a paltry excuse at comfort, but it was all I had. Eddie would certainly have some trouble in his future despite the necessity of his actions. Hopefully, rational minds would be able to see past the bloody stake and find the truth behind its story. Considering that Rose and I were currently on the run and hiding in a bedroom, history wasn't exactly in his favor, however.

"I know, I know." Her head fell back against the wall and she gave a heavy sigh. "I just can't stand leaving her undefended. I want so badly to go back and keep her safe. Right now. What if it happens again?"

As much as I wished I could tell that it wouldn't be an issue, I wasn't going to lie to her. I had worried that Lissa's continued run for the royal title would stir up some protesters, and while I hadn't anticipated an assassination attempt, I also couldn't say that I was totally surprised. When I was very young, the human world in my country had been rife with tense political happenings. I had thankfully been kept apart from most of those issues since my family lived in a smaller city and the Moroi world ran on its own political ruling, but that didn't mean I was completely unaware of the talk around town. There was one thing I could tell her with complete assurance, though, because we had made sure of it. "Other people are there to protect her."

Rose shrugged in acknowledgment, but her foot still tapped with restless anxiety. In her eyes, I could still see the battle-ready urge to run out and fight for her friend. That was Rose, though. My beautiful warrior. She was fearless. She was protective. She was loyal, dedicated, strong, determined, and so, so very capable.

"Believe me, I want to protect her too, but we'd risk our lives for nothing if we take off right now. Wait a little longer and at least risk your life for something important." With a gentle grin at the thought of her and her passion, I took a few hesitant steps towards her.

Her lips tightened into a thin line. "And Jill is important, isn't she?"

I nodded. "Very."

She shook her head and laughed in disbelief. "We did it." The laughter slowly went from disbelief to awe as a smile grew across her face. "We did it. Against all reason...somehow, we found Lissa's lost sister. Do you realize what this means? Lissa can have everything she's entitled to now. They can't deny her anything. Hell, she could be queen if she wanted. And Jill…" Her smile faded a little. "Well, she's part of an ancient royal family. That's got to be a good thing, right?"

I glanced towards the door. "I think that depends on Jill and what the after-effects of all this are."

When I looked back, Rose's face was completely downcast and guilt-ridden. I tilted her face back up and brushed the small frown from her cheek. "Hey, It's okay. You did the right thing. No one else would have tried something this impossible. Only Rose Hathaway. You took a gamble to find Jill. You risked your life by breaking Abe's rules – and it paid off. It was worth it."

"I hope Adrian thinks so. He thinks leaving our 'safe house' was the stupidest thing ever."

As quick as the freezing touch of ice, I pulled my hand away from the girl that wasn't mine to comfort. "You told him about all this?"

"Not about Jill. But I accidentally told him we weren't in West Virginia anymore." She put her hand out and hastily reassured me, "He's kept it secret, though. No one else knows."

"I can believe that." I swallowed and tried not to give away the twisting pain in my gut. "He...he seems pretty loyal to you."

I hated the little half smile that dimpled her cheek. "He is. I trust him completely."

"And he makes you happy?" I tried to shake away the small chip in my voice but it grew a tad bit sharper as I thought of the way he had made her laugh, even as we ran through a jail and towards a getaway car.

"Yeah, he does." She laughed a little and bit her lip. "I have fun with him. I mean, he's infuriating sometimes – okay, a lot of the time – but don't be fooled by all the vices. He's not a bad person."

"I know he isn't. He's a good man." I had no qualms about admitting that. We might not have gotten off to the best start but the more I got to know him, the more I respected him. That respect for him only made me feel more guilty, unfortunately. I tried to shake the feeling off. "It's not easy for everyone to see, but I can. He's still getting himself together, but he's on his way. I saw it in the escape."

Rose gave a little hum.

"And after...after Siberia, he was there for you?" Lissa had told me. Adrian had told me. I needed to hear it from her own lips, though.

All I got was a confused (and somewhat concerned) nod.

My mind raced, my heart slowed, and my mouth went dry at the last little sliver of truth I had to know. I had to know it. Even if it broke me, I had to know it. I just couldn't bear to look at her when I asked it.

"Do you love him?"

I stared out the window, dreading the answer. The silence stretched between us and with every tick of the bedside clock, I became more torn between hope and heartbreak.

"Yeah. I...I do love him."

Heartbreak. "Good. I'm glad."

She had always been able to see right through me so it didn't surprise me to hear her footsteps coming up behind me. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. I just wanted to make sure you're okay. That you're happy." I turned to face her, putting on a smile that I knew wouldn't fool her in the slightest. Still, the tendency to hide things from everyone, including those I cared about most just to keep from burdening them, was a hard thing to let go of. It was Rose though, and I knew she'd understand. And even if she didn't, she wouldn't judge. I could tell her anything and everything, so I tried to push forward. "Things have just been changing, that's all. It's making me reconsider so much. Ever since Donovan...and then Sonya...it's strange. I thought it had all changed the night Lissa saved me. But it didn't. There's been so much more, more to the healing than I realized." So much I had refused to see. "Everyday I figure out something new. Some new emotion I'd forgotten to feel. Some revelation I totally missed. Some beauty I didn't see."

"Hey, my hair in the alley does not go on that list, okay?" She wagged a finger at me in jest. "You were in shock."

My fingers twitched, longing to feel those tresses again. "No, Roza. It was beautiful. It's beautiful now."

"The dress is just throwing you off."

She wasn't completely wrong. The dress had thrown me off. Seeing her in a dress always had that effect on me, be it black, red, or even this gray one. Dear god...if I ever saw her in white...it would either make me the happiest man in the world or destroy me completely. It would all depend on where I was standing when the music played.

"What?" She shifted back timidly, looking somewhat unsure of herself. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

I exhaled sharply, shaking my head and offering her a rueful smile that almost stabbed me in the heart. "Because sometimes, a person can get so caught up in the details that they miss the whole. It's not just the dress or the hair. It's you. You're beautiful."

I had been so stupid before. Not ignorant, or blind. Either of those words suggested that I had some lack of understanding of what was before me. I knew exactly how special Rose was. Perhaps I didn't know just how blessed I was to have her love, but I knew that her love was amazing. I knew that her love was the best thing I ever had and ever could have hoped to have. Perhaps that's why I so adamantly rejected it after my restoration. I felt so undeserving of anything good in this life.

And Rose was the very definition of 'good' to me. She was the beauty I had needed. She was the beauty I had craved. She was the beauty I had torn apart in my hate and self-loathing until there was nothing for me to salvage when I realized I needed it to survive. Surviving without her beauty in my life...it was too agonizing to think about. "So beautiful it hurts me."

Her lips parted and I saw a choked breath disappear like I had just knocked the wind out of her. It was almost the same stunned look she had worn when I told her that I didn't love her, but instead of the immediate image of betrayal and pain that had followed that lie, all I was given now was this blank shock that left me fearful of what my admission meant for us. I half expected her to yell at me or lash out, and she would have been well within her rights to do that after what I had put her through, but she just stared at me.

And then the flicker of light flashed in her eyes, the flame growing little by little until the warmth reached my soul and thawed my worry a little. The corners of her lips tilted up almost imperceptibly. It wasn't the full smile I thrived on, not even close, but it was a small whisper of it. It was a small hint of my smile, the one I had seen in our most private moments, and it gave me a small but dangerous spark of hope.

Fear could make people do horrible things. That emotion could make you capable of hurting others. It could make you push people away and lie. It could make you worry so much about life that you forgot to actually live it.

Hope, though, oh, hope made you reckless. Hope could make you wonder 'what if?' Hope could make you stare at the lips of the beautiful woman in front of you and try to remember just what they tasted like. Hope could make you admit the truth.

Hope could make me do something so dangerous, so reckless, so incredibly daring as telling Rose I love her.

So I did.

My lips opened just as the door flung open.

"Hey, guys, have you – oh." Sydney stopped suddenly in the entryway of the room, quickly looking between us before pulling back. "Sorry. I – that is –"

Rose jumped away from me and I pulled back, turning and wiping the still unspoken words from my mouth. I cursed myself for my stupidity in thinking I could just tell Rose I loved her when she had quite literally admitted that she loved Adrian less than five minutes before. What had I been thinking?

Rose covered while I tried to gather myself again. "No problem. What's going on?"

Sydney glanced at me over Rose's shoulder with a little concern and I waved her off. It hardly fooled her, but she was kind enough not to call me out with Rose standing between us. "I...that is...I just wanted to come and hang out. I can't handle that going on downstairs."

Rose hesitated. "Sure. We were just...talking."

I tried not to flinch at the unintentional slight. It wasn't as if Rose could tell her just how close I had been to saying that I loved her more than I had ever thought possible. Nor could she tell Sydney that I had been seconds away from kissing her because I couldn't stand not feeling her in my arms anymore. How could Rose tell her those things when she hadn't known them herself?

"We were talking about Jill," Rose continued, sounding a bit more sure of herself and tossing whatever had been about to happen behind us. "Do you have any ideas on how to get her to Court – seeing as we're all outlaws?"

Sydney's brows furrowed a bit as she pondered the question, puzzling out options and strategies like the true general that Rose and I liked to joke about. "Well, you could always have her mother –"

A house-shaking crash sounded downstairs and Rose and I tensed, both of us reaching for our stakes and pushing past Sydney into the hallway. We were trained to act, to fight, but we were also trained to protect. The moment I heard the overwhelming shouts for people to 'get down' and the smell of smoke from what must have been a flash bang grenade, I stopped and yanked Rose behind me.

"Guardians," I said, pressing Rose between my body and the wall. "There are guardians raiding the house."

Author's Note

Hey guys! I know you were waiting very patiently for this chapter and I appreciate it. School is kicking my booty but any spare moment that isn't spent learning about proper infection control techniques, alginate impressions, or how to prepare and place temporary crowns is spent writing. I'm not even making dinners anymore! That has been regulated to my husband. I've had macaroni and cheese twice this week. Please send help.

This week's question of the week is: What's your favorite RomCom (romantic comedy) movie? If were stalking my facebook page this week, which you totally should be by the way, then you saw me basically beg you to all to go see "Crazy Rich Asians" in theaters. It's made my top five list of favorite RomComs. Maybe even the top three. The Holiday with Kate Winslet and Cameron Diaz still holds the top spot for me, though. Anyways, I love it. I want to know what other ones you enjoy and see if you can give me favs a run for their money.

Thanks again for bearing with me through this madness. I know the schedule has been royally messed up. Just a note to a few of you that have asked: I am trying to write and post weekly, but it has been difficult to do so. Keep checking back every Sunday evening/Monday morning and know that I'll post as soon as I possibly can. I love you all and I appreciate your support. I couldn't do this without you.