King Of Pain
Joe Morelli sits there feeling ridiculous and numb. He has been dumped. Again. Twice in a week. By Stephanie Plum. He simply can't fucking believe it. He still hasn't had a clue what the Hell is going on. He instinctively knows there is something very wrong but Stephanie is determined not to tell him. What happened? What's wrong? Is it because of something he said? What the heck has he done so wrong? He takes a long breath to calm himself but still can't get rid of the anxiousness in his gut. Everything suddenly seems so unreal. He feels like the whole world has moved on and he is left behind. It makes him feel fragile, confused, and vulnerable. It makes him feel angry and scared. And he hates feeling weak. He always, always, needs to be in control. He knows perfectly well what kind of man he is. He knows what he wants and needs. He didn't have a great childhood. He wants to have his own family. He can see himself as the pillar of his family. He will be a competent protector and provider to his wife and kids. He's no cheater. He won't be like his brother. He's no wife and child beater. He won't be like his father. He doesn't do divorce. He won't end up like those senior detectives who are sadly married to their jobs. He used to be a wild troubled kid. But he has changed. Now he just wants to settle down and be happy. He just wants to sit in a rocking chair and sing a lullaby to his first born child.
But why does it have to be Stephanie Plum?
He knows he will never be able to forget Terry. He knows he will be lying if he says he doesn't find Joyce Barnhardt sexy. He's not ashamed to admit that he's attracted to Jeanne Ellen Burrows. He also knows quite a few single elementary school teachers and emergency room nurses. He has a respectable job and a nice cozy house. He's good-looking and fun to be with. He can be really charming if he sets his mind to it. He is a golden bachelor. So why the Hell does it have to be Stephanie?
He rubs his eyes tiredly. He suddenly wants to laugh at himself. He feels so silly. He's no longer a mean nasty teenage boy. He's not a love-sick high school kid. Maybe it's time to cut his loss and walk away. Maybe it's time to move on without a backward glance. Maybe it's time to find someone else. Someone who's more docile and cooperative. Someone who loves cooking and kids. Someone who knows what her duty is. Someone who knows her priority. Someone who doesn't have irresponsible dreams. Someone who's lovely, cute, fun, and audacious in bed. Someone who's totally unlike Stephanie Plum. He stands up and walks out of the quiet café. The sun shines in his eyes. The noises on the streets ring in his ears. Is he at a loss? Does he feel lonely? Should he try again? Will Stephanie change her mind? Does it have to do with Ranger? He doesn't know. He doesn't care. He's going to make the most of his off day. He's going to to order a large pizza, grab a beer, sit down on his couch, kick off his shoes, and watch a rerun game. There's nothing time can't heal. There's a perfect woman out there somewhere waiting for him. All his dreams will be fulfilled. He's tall dark handsome. He's lean-muscled and looks dangerous. He's Italian. And dangerous is the new sexy. He will get what he wants. He always gets what he wants. He only wishes he knows what the Hell is wrong with Stephanie Plum.
Joe Morelli starts his car and heads back home. Being a devoted police detective means long working hours and great stress. He's looking forward to spend some quality time with Bob, his somewhat neglected dog. He totally deserves to be happy. He totally deserves to have someone taking good care of him. He will have no trouble finding another smiling willing woman. No, it doesn't have to be Stephanie. He steps on the gas and drives down the street. He lets out a huge sigh when he gets an urgent call from his partner and has to head back to the police station. He parks the car at the usual spot as the wind starts to chill. He thinks of the 3 unsolved cases in his hand and feels frustrated. He steps through the door of TPD and comes face to face with Ranger. Ranger is actually slightly taller than he is, Morelli suddenly realizes and immediately feels his anger start to boil.
He narrows his eyes and clenches his jaw as he tastes the familiar bitterness of of jealousy. Oh yeah, he's jealous of Ranger, the Man of Mystery, the Man in Black, Stephanie, Connie, and Lula's Batman. The mysterious crazy bastard dances to his own drums and never bothers about the law. He's good. He's more than good. He's 100 shades of grey. He leaves no trace, no witness, and no evidence. He drives expensive fancy cars and makes big bucks. And Morelli feels like he's being slapped every time he sees Stephanie driving one of Ranger's shining black cars. What kind of man will have no choice but to stand there and watch when his girlfriend is once again being saved by another man? What kind of man will have no choice but to clench his teeth while people laughing behind his back and telling improper jokes? He doesn't have that kind of money to waste. He doesn't have all those loyal muscular and equally crazy minions. All he can do is show up at Stephanie's door when everything is calm and all the bad guys are caught to claim his ownership through balls-to-the-wall wild animal sex. And now at this moment as he looks into Ranger's calm cool dark brown eyes, Joe Morelli realizes for the very first time just how pathetic he really is.
"Manoso." He finally manages to say rigidly. No doubt Ranger knows what's wrong with Stephanie. He's her friend. He's her mentor. He has saved her butt for a zillion times. He has her trust. She keeps no secrets from him. Everybody in this fucking universe knows he wants to eat Stephanie like lunch. Joe Morelli tightens his fists. He can't help wondering what will happen if he throws a punch at the former special forces right now. Will he be able to knock off a couple of those too white and too even teeth?
"Morelli." Ranger's voice is as soft, polite and confident as ever. As usual he reveals no emotion. But something in that well-controlled voice sends a cold shiver down Joe Morelli's spine as the corner of those perfect lips almost curves a fraction upward. Something changes in the air. The several uniformed officers near the door stop whatever they are doing and uneasily look their way. Ranger's barely there smile materializes for a brief second and then disappears as Ranger walks silently out of TPD.
Joe Morelli stands there frozen. He is not easy to scare. He doesn't like being threatened. He tries his best not to tremble and forces a smile on his face when he hears his partner call his name impatiently. He has seen a tiger in the New York Central Park Zoo when he was little, and Ranger has just reminded him how much he is scared of tigers. He snaps out of his trance, squares his shoulders, and walks toward the small debriefing room. He exhales a resigned sigh. Someday he'll find his happiness with someone else, and it doesn't have to be Stephanie Plum.