Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight and The Avett Brothers own The Perfect Space title.
As usual, thanks goes out to SabLuvsLogan
Chapter 22
When Edward walked into his house after returning from the meadow with Bella, he found his parents sitting hand in hand on the couch in the living room. He slowly removed his jacket as Esme and Carlisle looked up at him, worry clouding their features.
"Edward," Esme said quietly.
"Don't," he whispered back.
"Son," Carlisle started. "You can't disappear on us like that. Even when you're upset you have to tell us where you're going."
"Did you do it on purpose?" Edward asked calmly, ignoring what his father was saying.
"What?" Esme asked.
"Did. You. Do. It. On. Purpose," he repeated, finally looking up to face them.
"Edward, we don't know what you're talking about," Carlisle answered.
"Yes you do," he whispered.
Esme quickly looked down, not being able to stand the way her son was looking at her.
"Tell me Jacob and Tanya came on their own and not because you asked them to."
"Edward," Carlisle started again.
"Tell me they came on their own and not because you asked them to," Edward repeated, cutting him off.
There was a long silence as they debated how to answer.
"We invited Tanya and Charlie invited Jacob," Esme replied finally.
"Why?"
"We thought you would like some kids your age here instead of only adults."
Edward stared at his mother, telling her he didn't believe her excuse.
"That's bull."
Esme took a deep breath as Carlisle stepped forward.
"We know you're upset," he started softly. Edward scoffed and crossed his arms. "But we want you to hear us out."
"I want to know the truth," Edward said firmly. "I don't want any excuses. I want it explained to me. The whole evening."
"We will."
"Everything. Why Bella was at one end of the table and me at the other, why you constantly brought up how perfect Tanya and I would be as a couple and how perfect Bella and Jacob would be together."
"If you listen we'll tell you the truth."
"This should be good," Edward muttered under his breath.
"Please, son," Carlisle said. Edward nodded and took a seat on the couch. Carlisle and Esme pulled up a chair and they sat down in front of him. "We know you're upset. We can see that. But please let us explain and you'll understand, okay?"
Edward took a deep breath trying to calm himself down. He gave a short nod, allowing Carlisle to offer his explanation.
"We needed to see how you were going to react."
Edward waited for him to say more but he never did.
"That's it? You needed to see how I was going to react?"
"Yes, both of you, you and Bella. At first we told them to come because we thought it would be nice for you to have some friends over tonight. But then…we decided to try a little something…to see how you would react."
"What exactly were you expecting?" Edward said slowly.
"We weren't really expecting anything specific…like we said…we just…wanted to see…"
"What did you want to see? You told me you would tell me the truth, so tell me all of it!" Edward demanded, quickly losing his patience.
His parents were skirting around the subject and he was getting tired of it.
Carlisle took a deep breath and spoke again. "When Tanya agreed to come down, Eleazar and Carmen told us she was very excited because apparently she had a little bit of a thing for you. We had a feeling you weren't interested because she didn't really seem your type but we thought…why don't we just…try and…maybe…suggest something…and see what he says. We wanted to see your reaction when someone suggested that the two of you would be good together.
"And then…Jacob was going to be alone so we invited him and we thought…while we're at it we can see how you would react to Bella being introduced to a boy her age. We wanted to see if you would care or not. We wanted to see if there was jealousy between the two of you or if you were comfortable with the other dating other people."
Edward was speechless. He had expected a wide range of excuses and even though he couldn't believe his parents had tried to set him up, he'd hoped he'd been wrong. He'd hoped they would reassure him and give him some other reason that would calm his worries.
He only felt the anger and the betrayal returning with no means to vent it. He tried to say something – anything – but he couldn't.
"Son, we understand you're probably even more upset now…but – "
"Stop," Edward whispered.
"But," Carlisle tried again.
"Stop," Edward repeated.
They sat in silence. Edward's breathing picked up as he sat, staring down at his hands, not being able to look his parents in the eye. He knew they expected him to forgive them. He knew what they were thinking – tell him the truth and he'll get over it.
But he couldn't.
"Sweetie, please," Esme said quietly.
"I don't want to hear it," Edward said, looking up at them. "I don't want to hear anymore. Whatever else you have to say…I don't want to hear it." He took a deep breath. "You ruined a perfectly good day. The two of you together with Charlie actually conspired to ruin a perfectly good day for us."
"Edward," Esme said softly.
"No, mom, I said I don't want to hear it. I didn't understand why you invited them and at first, I wasn't even going to ask. I didn't want to hear you say the words. But now that you did…there's nothing else you can say that will make it any better. I don't need whatever bullshit excuse you're going to give me."
"Son, please, let us finish, you said you would – " Carlisle pleaded.
"No!" he yelled. "This was our first holiday back. Do you realize that? Or did you not even care to think about us?"
"Of course we did!" Esme said.
"It was our first holiday! All we wanted was to enjoy it in peace and quiet. We wanted to spend the day with our family and give thanks for being fucking alive and in the comfort of our homes and you ruined it!"
"Edward, please," Esme cried.
"You know what the worst part is, mom? Do you know? Let me tell you. What you did tonight…I can expect it from dad, I can expect it from Chief Swan, but I cannot expect it from you."
It was a low blow and Edward knew it. Esme's face distorted, displaying the pain of his words, but Edward was too upset to feel bad.
"You know how excited Bella was yesterday to finally learn how to cook a turkey? She was so excited to come over here this morning and spend the time with you. So excited! And look how you repaid her."
"I…"
"I thought you liked Bella," Edward interrupted. "I thought you enjoyed her company. I thought…"
"I do!" Esme quickly answered. "I love her! She's such a sweetheart! This has nothing to do with that! Of course I like her!"
"And yet you still felt the need to destroy our Thanksgiving?"
"We weren't trying to destroy anything, Edward!" Carlisle said. "We didn't know how you were going to react. We certainly didn't think you would react this negatively. We were hoping to find some signs…something confirming our suspicions…something to – "
"Your suspicions?" Edward asked quickly.
Carlisle and Esme looked at each other briefly and Edward understood.
"Is that what tonight was about?" he asked, his anger flaring.
Neither said a word.
"You wanted to confirm the suspicions you had about me and Bella?"
Esme looked up at him and gave him a soft smile. When she spoke, her voice quivered. "You…you keep telling us you're not dating, but…it's getting really hard for us to believe."
"Oh my God!" Edward yelled as he stood up from the couch. "Why does it matter so much? Why do you care so much! Whether we're dating or not should not have affected how you acted tonight."
"We needed to know the truth!" Esme answered.
"Why?"
"Because we need to know, Edward," Carlisle said. "You hardly talk to us anymore. You realize we haven't had a single decent conversation since you got back? We talk about school and the weather and your day and that's all. You never come to us for anything anymore!"
"You did this because I'm not confiding in you anymore?" Edward asked, outraged.
"No, Edward! We did this because we were suspicious and we…"
"Then ask me! All you had to do was sit me down, ask me flat out, and tell me there would be severe consequences if I didn't answer truthfully. You should have handled it like parents and not like a bunch of fucking detectives trying to rope me into a confession!"
"We tried!" Esme exclaimed. "That day I found you in your bedroom, it was so obvious what you were doing! I asked you and you said nothing. You honestly think you would have told us if we sat you down and forced it out of you? You would have gotten upset and stormed out!"
"You could have done it in a civilized manner! What you did tonight…sneaking around behind our backs…inviting Tanya and Jacob to flirt with us to see what we would do…it's absolutely ridiculous. I can't believe you would do that to us."
"We only did it because we thought there was no other way!"
"Why was that a last resort? Why does it matter?"
"Because Edward! Because! It's a huge deal if you're a couple. A huge deal. I don't understand how you can't see that. If you and Bella are involved romantically, we need to know," Carlisle answered.
"Why?"
"Because everything will change. Everything will be different."
"No, it won't. Whether we are or we aren't is none of your business."
"Yes it is."
"No. It's not."
"Yes! It is!"
"Why? How does it affect you?"
"Because it's not real!" Carlisle yelled.
Edward was shocked silent. He was going to ask his father to explain but Carlisle didn't need Edward to ask.
"It's not real, Edward. If you're together…what you feel for her…what she feels for you…it's not…real."
And there it was.
The underlying reason.
It hit him like a ton of bricks and the answer he had prepared in rebuttal no longer felt right.
The words hung in the air and Edward could practically hear them echoing around him.
He gritted his teeth in anger. "You don't know anything about what I feel."
Edward was too angry to stay and face his parents. There had been so much he wanted to say but in that second, he could hardly breathe. He couldn't believe what his father had said and instead of waiting for him to explain further, he went up to his bedroom, slamming the door shut.
He sat on his bed with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands and he allowed his thoughts to run wild.
He didn't know how much time passed but he stayed in his room, mulling everything over. He imagined all the possible things he could have said to his father. He pictured himself marching down to the kitchen, reciting a perfectly practiced speech about him not having a clue what Bella meant to him.
His breathing hadn't gone back to normal and all he wanted in that moment was Bella. He needed her to wrap her arms around his neck and tell him it was going to be okay. He thought about her at home, probably having the same conversation with Charlie that he had with his parents, and he hoped it was going better than his had.
He couldn't believe the words Carlisle had said.
What you feel for her…what she feels for you…it's not…real.
He couldn't get them out of his mind and because of that, he couldn't calm himself down. His father had no idea what they were like together. He had no idea what they meant to each other. Bella was everything to him. He cared for her more than anything in the world and having his father degrade it not only made him angry, but it hurt beyond belief.
At this point in Edward's life, everything was uncertain. Nothing made sense to him anymore – except for Bella. He didn't know what he wanted to do, where he wanted to go, all he knew was that he wanted her there, by his side. He knew that as long as she was present, he would be okay – they would be okay.
The night wore on, and Edward's anger slowly abated. He was expecting Bella to call at any moment, giving him the okay to head over, so he was anxiously sitting by his phone. He needed her. After having over two hours alone, thinking and driving himself crazy, he needed her reassurance.
He started to gather his things, getting ready so that as soon as she called he would be ready to leave, when there was a soft knock at his bedroom door.
Edward turned and watched at his door opened slowly, revealing an apologetic looking Carlisle.
"Can I come in?"
Edward sighed and sat down on his bed. "Yeah," he whispered.
Even though he was hurt and confused, he couldn't forbid his father from entering his bedroom.
Carlisle stepped into the room and quietly shut the door behind him.
The silence was deafening.
Edward had nothing to say to his father but Carlisle had tons. He made no move to sit down or to speak – he just stood in front of his son, hoping to right the wrong he'd created.
Carlisle took a deep breath. "When you first came back home to Forks, you were…miserable," Carlisle started. Edward lifted his head to look at his father and found his features twisted in agony. "You were…distant…despondent…like you were still in that room…like you hadn't been rescued yet. It…killed us. We didn't know what to do…we didn't know how to handle it." Carlisle took another deep breath. "Do you remember that first day back home? You showered, you changed, and then you walked downstairs and you were…lost. You didn't know how to sit down and relax. You didn't know how to just…rest on a couch and watch some TV…it had been too long since you'd done something so…normal."
Edward didn't say a word. He needed to know what his father was getting at so he sat and he watched as Carlisle spoke up again.
"Your mother and I…we were…just as miserable. Even though we'd gotten you home – which was more than we could have ever imagined – it felt like you didn't feel safe… like you didn't feel at home. We didn't know what to do so we contemplated all sorts of different things…how to make you feel at home, at ease, safe, comfortable, anything. We tried all sorts of different things but nothing was working. For three weeks you were just…not really with us. Not really back."
Edward swallowed audibly as the pain in his father's eyes made his chest ache. He'd never seen Carlisle so solemn, so unhappy, and so… afraid. He felt like he needed to reassure him – to say something, anything, to take the worry away.
Edward opened his mouth so say something but Carlisle lifted his hand, indicating he needed to finish. Edward nodded and Carlisle continued.
"Your mother and I…we…were sick with worry. It was taking a toll on our marriage, on our personal lives, on my practice, everything. We had almost given up hope and thought we just needed to…deal with it…that you would never be the same and it wouldn't matter what we would do to make you feel at home and welcome and safe again…it just…wouldn't matter." Carlisle paused for a second. "And then…out of nowhere…you came back. It was like everything disappeared and you started to act as if you were never gone. You acted like nothing happened to you and we didn't understand it. You made this huge drastic change…overnight. One day you were quiet, distant, always distracted, never focusing on anything. You were hardly eating, hardly doing anything. And then…all of a sudden…you were okay. You were eating breakfast, saying hi and bye, smiling…and it was so strange. You were acting like nothing horrible happened to you…like you no longer needed to cope with the events of the summer. It was like you'd forgotten about it. And ever since that day…we've been walking on eggshells. We don't know if it's temporary, if one day you'll wake up and you'll be just as miserable…just as…distant…and it terrifies us, Edward. It…terrifies us."
Carlisle's voice broke at the end and Edward knew he had nothing left to say. He couldn't say anymore so it was Edward's turn to speak.
"Dad, I can't…explain it to you. I don't know what happened…I can't…justify it. But…why aren't you happy? You should be glad I'm not depressed…you should be glad I'm not…moping around anymore."
His voice was low and he spoke slowly and softly. The room was dark and silent around them and they both knew the conversation they were having should have been had a long time ago.
"I can't be glad, son, because I don't understand it. I'll tell you what I really feel, alright? I feel like this is all temporary, Edward. What you're feeling…you're sheltering yourself from your real feelings, from your real fears. You and Bella together are shielding yourselves from the demons that need to be handled. By being friends…it's fine that you need each other in a way that I'll never understand. But by being involved romantically, you can never be sure of what you want. You're both afraid to face the past and you're forgetting about it together instead of healing and getting over it. I feel that one day, something will happen, and you'll fall right back into that rut."
There was a long pause and Carlisle finally moved from his spot in front of the door. He walked toward Edward and sat down on his bed beside him. They both breathed quietly as neither said a word, until the silence was broken by Edward's cell phone vibrating on his nightstand. Edward watched his phone knowing who it was and for the first time, he didn't answer it on the first ring. He let it vibrate on the stand until it stopped and they were once again sitting in silence.
"Do you understand what I'm saying, Edward?" Carlisle asked. "Do you understand how worried we are for you?"
Edward nodded.
"We need you to understand that, son. Your mother and I…we drive ourselves crazy with worry some days. We're always afraid for you…all we want is for you to be safe. That's all we want. As a parent, all we want is for you to be okay, for you to feel like you have a home. And this is your home, Edward."
"I know," Edward replied softly. "I do feel at home here, I do. I feel safe and comfortable and all that stuff. You don't have to…worry…this will always be my home."
Carlisle nodded.
"But…dad…I get that you're worried. I get it. But what you guys did tonight, it's inexcusable. This talk we're having doesn't suddenly make everything okay. You had no right… scheming… like that. I trust you guys, I really do, but it makes me really doubt your intentions when you do stuff like that."
"I know, Edward, we handled it wrong and we're very sorry." He paused for a second. "We just don't want you and Bella dating each other for the wrong reasons, okay? We don't know what you feel for each other but…it has to be because you want to be together and not because you're more comfortable being together."
"Dad, I was serious before when I said it's none of your business. I know you want the best for me but you and mom have no say in what we do. Whether we're dating or not…it's our choice and you can't decide for us."
Carlisle nodded. "I know."
"I want that to be clear. I know what happened to us. I know our relationship scares you guys because you don't know what's happening but I want it to be clear that whatever decisions we make…you have no say."
When Edward dropped Bella off at home, she sighed in exasperation knowing her night was going to be ruined by the conversation she was about to have with her father. She walked into her house to find Charlie sitting in the kitchen, and the second her eyes locked with his, her anger ignited.
Unlike Edward, Bella didn't give Charlie a chance to explain himself. She saw him and she burst. She yelled and she screamed and she told him he had absolutely no right to do what he had done.
"When Carlisle and Esme told me they were inviting an old friend of Edward's I decided to invite an old friend of yours," Charlie had explained. "It was only afterward that we realized we could try something out to see how you guys would react to the situation."
Charlie had gone on to explain to Bella what Carlisle and Esme had explained to Edward. Just like Edward, she had found it completely and utterly ridiculous and it angered her further.
"You have no say in who I date!" she told him.
He argued his point and she argued hers and when he mentioned the same thing Carlisle did – the fact that whatever they were feeling wasn't real – she reacted just like Edward had. She was shocked silent and she couldn't conjure up an appropriate rebuttal. Charlie had taken advantage of her silence to tell her how much she meant to him and how much he needed her to be safe and okay.
"I don't want you to get hurt, Bells. I need you to be okay. I don't know anything about this stuff but when Carlisle explained it to me…it made sense."
"Stop letting Carlisle dictate your actions, dad! Everything you do is because Carlisle said so. The only reason you agreed to letting me see Dr Aro was because Carlisle said it would be good for me."
"Because what do I know, Bella? I don't know how to handle a teenage daughter who went through what you went through!"
Charlie went on to tell her how miserable she had been when she had first gotten back from the kidnapping. He told her how difficult it was for him to know there was nothing he could do to make her feel better. He made Bella feel just as sorry as Carlisle had made Edward feel and although she felt bad, she still needed to set the record straight.
"Dad, Edward means the world to me. He's…everything. Whether we're dating or not makes absolutely no difference. You've been treating him so horrible lately and he's done nothing wrong. You don't say a proper hello or goodbye to him, you don't ask him questions or even look at him, you just…mumble a hello when he's here and that's it. He's done nothing to deserve that treatment."
Charlie had stared at her, not knowing what to say and Bella took the opportunity to take a deep breath in order to calm herself down.
"He is so sweet to me, dad. Everyday…he protects me. He's always so…careful with me…making sure I'm okay, making sure I'm not getting hurt. You should be grateful I have him around."
Although she had been extremely upset, she told herself she wouldn't cry.
"I want you to start treating him differently. And I want you to start making decisions for yourself. Stop letting the Cullens dictate your choices. I know it's hard with me living here…I know that. It's hard for me too but I don't want to leave, okay? I really like it here with you but you spend so much time focussing on Edward that you're not letting me and you get close. I'm dealing with this, dad, okay? You don't have to worry about having a depressed teenage girl under your roof."
Charlie gave her a slow nod.
"And I want you to understand that whether Edward and I are dating is up to us. You and the Cullens have no say in that decision."
Charlie had given her another small nod and they were both able to calm themselves down. They ended their argument with an apologetic hug and Bella headed up to her bedroom, glad to soon be putting the day behind her.
She sat in her room and she remembered how perfect she felt in the meadow with Edward, mere hours ago. Recalling the way he'd touched her, the way he'd made her feel, she blushed at the memory. Him asking her to be his girlfriend and the gentle way he'd touched and kissed her scar. She wanted to go back to that and she desperately hoped that the following days would be focussed solely on that – on her and Edward and the fact that they were now boyfriend and girlfriend.
The second she heard Charlie's bedroom door close, she grabbed her cellphone and dialled Edward's number, needing him to be there for her. When he didn't pick up on the first ring, she worried over how his conversation went and the more it rang, the worse she felt.
She wondered if the Cullens had told him that what they felt for each other wasn't real as well. Bella knew that what she felt was very real but she feared what Edward was thinking. Was he not answering her call because he was busy or because he had rethought their arrangement? The thought plagued her as she changed into her pyjamas and brushed her teeth. When she got back to her bedroom she called again but he never picked up. Her breathing started to pick up as she prepared herself for him not showing up.
More time passed and she lay down in her bed, resting her head on her pillow, willing her heart to calm itself. Just as she started to nod off, she heard the familiar light knock at her window and she bolted upright in excitement.
She smiled as she ran to the window, opening it up in invitation.
"Hey," Edward whispered as he slipped through the pane.
"Hi," she whispered back.
They stood awkwardly in front of each other, both wanting to reach for the other but neither making the move to do so.
"Sorry I didn't answer my phone. I was…talking," Edward said.
"It's okay."
She didn't want to admit how worried she'd been so she merely shrugged her shoulders and gave him a small smile.
Edward shrugged off his jacket then and placed it over her bed before pulling her into a warm hug. She sighed into him and wrapped her arms around his waist as they stood together, basking in the feel of the other.
"How did it go?" he asked with his arms firmly wrapped around her.
"Pretty terribly. You?"
"Same," he replied with a sigh.
They spent the next hour rehashing the details of their argument and they both agreed they felt much better after having told their parents they had absolutely no say in any of the choices they were to make.
"I basically told them it was none of their business," Edward said.
"Yeah, I told Charlie he's not allowed to tell me who and who not to date. It's not the eighteenth century for crying out loud." She paused for a second before smiling and moving closer to him. "And um…I also…talked you up a little bit. I told him all about how sweet you really are and he may have warmed up to you."
They were lying side by side on the floor, propped on their elbows, keeping their heads up with their hands. He smiled at her words and wrapped his arm around her, pulling her halfway on top of him so her head rested on his chest.
"What did you tell him about me?" he teased.
"I don't know…all sorts of stuff," she said with a laugh.
Edward soothingly rubbed her back.
"Come on, I want to know what you said. Did you tell him how funny and perfect I am?"
"I told him how good of a kisser you are," she said as she leaned up and lightly placed her lips on his.
He laughed. "Awesome. Out of all the things you could have told your father, I'm glad you chose that."
She smiled and placed her head back on his chest.
"I think things are going to be good now," Edward whispered against her hair.
"I think so too," she replied, sighing contently.
They stayed like that for a moment, enjoying the silence and stillness of the room. Neither said a word as Edward continued to stroke her back as she breathed evenly above him.
After a while, she asked the question that was bothering her most.
"Edward?" she whispered, breaking the long silence.
"Mmhmm?"
"It's real, right?" She lifted her head to look at him. "This…us…it's real, right?"
He gave her a small smile as he stroked her cheek. "It feels pretty damn real to me, Bella," he replied.
She nodded. "Yeah…me too."
She placed her head back down on his chest, the beat of his heart like a lullaby as they both fell asleep, thankfully putting the horridness of the day behind them.
The following day, Bella sat in the living room with her mother, enjoying the last day she would get to spend with her.
"I heard you and Charlie arguing last night. Did you get everything resolved?"
Bella shrugged. "Yeah, pretty much. I was…really upset…but we talked it over and…things are good now."
Renee nodded slowly then paused before answering.
"Bella, I want you to keep in mind that he has no idea what he's doing, alright? He never had you here with him alone for such a long period of time. And now that you are here, you're a teenager and that makes everything so much harder."
"I know, but I needed to make it clear that he can be a father figure without telling me what to do. It's one thing to set ground rules and it's another to tell me who I can and can't date."
Renee gave a small smile. "I know, sweetie." She paused for a second "If you don't mind me asking, where did you and Edward go last night?"
Bella smiled at the memory. "Edward knows this place in the woods. It's beautiful, mom. It's a large open space with trees surrounding it and flowers everywhere and it overlooks a river. He always takes me there when things get a little…rough."
Renee bit her lip in worry. "What do you guys do there?"
Bella blushed as she vividly remembered exactly what happened the previous night in the meadow. "We talk and stuff," she replied. It wasn't a complete lie; it just wasn't the whole truth.
"Again with the 'stuff' word. What does that mean?"
Bella shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know. Edward used to go there when he needed to think… so, that's what we usually do."
"You're all alone in a beautiful opening in the woods and all you do is talk?"
Bella bit her lip and Renee was very aware of the blush on her daughters face – she knew exactly what they were doing in the meadow.
"He asked me to be his girlfriend last night," Bella replied with a shy smile.
Renee grinned. "Really? Oh, baby girl, that's great! Your very first boyfriend! A good one, indeed," she replied.
Bella smiled and nodded.
"Sweetie, I know you said we don't have to have the talk again and I have nothing to worry about but…eventually…maybe…as your relationship progresses…"
Bella scrunched her eyebrows, not understand what her mother was asking her.
"I'm sure you know what you have to do, but…maybe you should take the proper precautions in advance so in case anything does happen, you're…prepared?"
"What do you mean?" Bella asked, still not fully understand what her mother was getting at.
"Well, maybe we should put you on…you know…the pill…just to be safe?"
"The pill? Mom, I told you, I'm not doing…that…with him."
"Yet," Renee muttered under her breath.
"Mom," Bella chided.
"Look, Bella, it's your first boyfriend, I know that, but I remember what it was like, okay? Sometimes these things just…happen… out of nowhere and when you're not expecting it but the next thing you know you're in the middle of it and I'm just saying it's better to be safe than sorry."
Bella contemplated her mother's words and she found herself remembering how easily things have gotten out of hand in the past when they didn't stop themselves. A small peck often turned into a long make out sessions, which lately ended with grinding and touching and she knew how easy it was for her to lose control with Edward.
"So…I should go on it even though I'm not…you know…"
"Well, I don't know when I'm going to be able to visit next, and I know you're not going to talk to your father about this, so I'd rather do this now so that when the time comes you don't have to do it alone."
Soon after their conversation, Bella and Renee headed out to the nearest clinic to put Bella on birth control. It wasn't how Bella had originally planned to spend her last day with her mother but she quickly realized she was glad she wasn't doing it alone. Having her mother with her – reassuring her she was making the right decisions – put her nerves at ease.
After the visit to the clinic, they headed to Port Angeles and enjoyed a nice lunch together before doing a bit of shopping. Even though the day had been going great, Bella still had a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach knowing her mother would be leaving the following morning. Spending the day together made her realize how badly she wanted Renee there with her all the time. She wanted her around whenever she was feeling nervous or afraid, whenever she needed reassurance that her and Edward were going to be okay, whenever Charlie went into one of his overprotective father modes. She knew Renee was only a phone call away but it wasn't enough. She wanted her mother to be there at all times with her shining eyes and exuberant laugh, her happy-go-lucky attitude and her brilliant smile.
That night, when Bella and Renee headed to bed, they both knew it was the last time they would be wishing each other goodnight face-to-face so they hugged each other tightly, Renee placing a warm kiss on her daughter's forehead before parting ways.
When Bella headed down to the kitchen the next morning, she saw the small suitcase packed and ready by the entrance and her heart clenched in pain. When Bella had decided to move to Forks for good, it broke both their hearts but it was something that needed to be done. Renee had understood everything her daughter had said and even though their goodbyes had been beyond painful, they both knew it was the right decision. It had taken a while for Bella to become accustomed to living without her mother, but now that she had spent the last three days with her, she really didn't want her to have to leave again.
After a quick breakfast, Bella and Charlie drove Renee to the airport. When they reached the gates, Renee stopped in order to give them a proper goodbye but her heart broke at the sight of the tears flowing freely down her daughter's cheeks. Charlie gave her a hug goodbye, thanking her for coming down and telling her to visit whenever she pleased. Renee smiled at him before thanking him and enveloping Bella in a tight hug. Bella hugged her back as tightly as she could, knowing she wouldn't be getting another warm hug from her mother anytime soon. They said their goodbyes as they cried and hugged until Renee was eventually forced through the gates, not wanting to miss her flight.
When Bella got home later that day, she called Edward and asked for him to come and keep her company. He would never say no to such a request so he rushed over, knowing how hard she would be taking Renee's departure. Bella was in the living room with Charlie so Edward grabbed the blanket off the back of the couch and wrapped it around her. He softly asked her if she was okay and if she needed anything, and when she said no, he sat down at the opposite end, lifting her feet into his lap and softly rubbing her leg as Charlie watched on.
He saw how gentle and sweet Edward was being with his daughter and he immediately knew exactly what she had been talking about during their argument. He knew he had no reason to hate the boy, and the more he thought about it, the more he realized he didn't hate him at all.
Bella eventually fell asleep from exhaustion but Edward stayed there, making sure she was warm and comfortable as he sat beside her.
Charlie kept his eye on them all afternoon. When Bella woke from her nap, he watched as Edward smiled warmly at her. He saw the smile spread across Bella's face as she woke up to the sight of Edward. He then watched as Edward prepared her a sandwich for lunch before putting in a movie for her to enjoy as she lay down.
Edward knew it was going to be difficult for Bella to have to say goodbye to her mother a second time so he was trying to make it as easy as possible for her.
"Bella," he whispered. "Alice called while you were sleeping, she said they were all going to her place tonight, do you want to go? Or would you rather stay in?"
Bella thought about it for a second before sitting up. "No, I want to go. It'll be nice to get out of the house."
That night, they all gathered in Alice's basement and Bella took comfort in the fact that she had friends there keeping her company. She missed her mom and she always would, but having them all there with her made things much easier.
They spent the night lounging around like they usually did. Edward, Emmett, and Jasper played video games while Rosalie, Alice, and Bella sat on the couches, talking. When they ran out of things to say, Edward asked Bella if she wanted to have a turn at the game. She smiled and agreed as she sat beside Edward, grabbing the controller from his hands. He kissed her cheek and showed her what to do before starting a new game and letting her play against Jasper and Emmett.
Half an hour later, Bella was quickly becoming a pro.
"Edward, man, she's totally kicking our asses!" Jasper exclaimed.
Edward was sitting on the couch next to Alice and Rosalie and he grinned. Bella turned around to smile at Edward and he winked at her.
"I can't believe this!" Emmett exclaimed. "Edward, you never told us how kickass Bella is!" Emmett threw his arm around Bella's shoulder. "Do you play this with Edward? Rose, why don't you play video games with me?"
"I'm too busy having sex with you, Emmett."
"Oh yeah," Emmett replied with a smirk.
"Emmett, get off my girlfriend," Edward said casually as he popped a jujube in his mouth.
Emmett grinned and let his arm fall down Bella's shoulder. "Girlfriend?" he asked with a smile.
Edward's head snapped up and Bella blushed shyly.
"Something you're not telling us?" Emmett asked, the same grin plastered to his face.
"Umm…" Edward started as he looked over at Bella.
He noticed the way she blushed and nervously bit her bottom lip and he smiled at how adorable she was.
"We're um…a…couple…now," he said slowly. "Officially."
"Finally!" Alice exclaimed.
Edward smiled and motioned for Bella to approach him. She got up from in front of the TV and walked over to Edward to sit sideways in his lap. He placed his hand behind her head and brought her forward to lay a soft kiss on her lips.
"So what's going to happen at school tomorrow?" Rosalie asked.
They shrugged. "I don't know, we're not hiding it anymore, so people are going to know we're together now."
"Poor Mike," Jasper said.
"Poor Jessica," Rosalie added.
"I can't believe I'm saying this, but…I can't wait for school on Monday," Emmett said.
And neither could Edward and Bella.
:::
As Edward awoke, he had no sense of time. He didn't know if he'd been out for minutes, hours, or days. His eyes slowly opened and he attempted to focus in on anything but his vision was blurred. He slowly sat upright but he immediately winced in pain as every inch of his body cried out in agony. He looked down to find his knuckles covered in cuts, scrapes, and bruises. There was dried blood along his hands and arms and he quickly leaned back to check his stomach.
He vividly remembered his fight with James and at the time it had felt like he had broken every bone in his body. His ribs ached and his stomach throbbed but he was fairly certain nothing was broken. He took deep breaths as he tried to find his bearings, needing to know where he was.
He looked around him and the familiarity of the basement came flooding back as he found himself back in his corner where he had spent the last two months. The space around him however, although familiar, felt off. It felt colder and dirtier, like the life had been completely sucked out of it more so than before.
He heard a faint cry across the room and he immediately knew it was Bella. He hated the fact that he hadn't thought of her sooner but he was in too much pain to register anything. The second he heard the cry he knew he had to get to her – he had to know if she was okay. He remembered telling her to run but James had hit him hard in the head and he had no idea what happened afterward.
He attempted to stand but his legs were weak and bruised. He forced his muscles to work and after many attempts, he finally got himself standing. Walking proved just as difficult but he made his way over to her, desperate to know how she was doing.
The room was darker than usual and he had a hard time manoeuvring around the multitude of boxes and garbage littering the floor. Her faint cries were getting louder as he approached and when he was finally in front of her, he saw her face contorted in pain as she gripped her stomach, the floor beneath her stained with blood. The sight before him knocked him to his knees.
"Bella," he whispered.
He watched as she slowly opened her eyes but she recoiled away from him in fear and he suddenly felt a whole different level of pain. He had scared her but he didn't know why or how. He hadn't said or done anything, she just instinctively pulled away from him when she saw him there.
"Bella? It's me, it's Edward."
She allowed herself to stare into his eyes and he saw the recognition as it dawned on her.
"Edward?" she cried.
She lifted her hand to cup his face and he winced in pain at the light touch. His cheeks were throbbing and it was taking everything he had not to let the tears flow down his face.
"Bella, let me see your stomach. You're bleeding."
"Your face," she whispered as she kept staring into his eyes.
"It doesn't matter, please, let me see your stomach."
He lightly took her hand away from his face as he slowly pushed her onto her back. She let out a small whimper and he immediately knew it was worse than what he'd imagined.
"I'm just going to lift your shirt a little bit so I can see, okay?"
She gave a small nod and he slowly lifted her shirt upward to properly take a look at where the blood was coming from. He tried to not let the shock be visible in his eyes because he knew she was staring into them but when he saw the long cut running from her left rib to her right hipbone, he lost the control he thought he had over the situation.
"Oh God," he whispered.
Her entire stomach was covered in blood and something about the look in her eye and the small groans of pain she was letting out put him into overdrive. He remembered a specific day when he was eight years old, when he fell off his bike and scraped his knee and Carlisle came out to help him.
"The first thing you do before cleaning a cut, Edward, is to wash your hands," Carlisle had said.
Edward bolted upright, forgetting about the pain in his legs and abdomen, and he ran to the bathroom. He washed his hands and he winced in pain as the water hit his sensitive knuckles. He scrubbed his hands clean and he frantically searched through the cabinets to find anything to clean her wound.
When he looked up into the cabinet beside the mirror, he caught a glimpse of his face in the reflection and he paused in panic. He looked completely different. His left eye was twice the size of his right one, his cheeks were pink and purple, and his lip was torn and bloodied.
It was no wonder Bella had pulled away from him – she hadn't recognized him.
He gave himself a few seconds to recover from the shock at having seen what damages the fight had caused but he quickly regrouped, grabbing everything in his arms and rushing back to Bella.
He immediately went to work, cleaning her cut, disinfecting, laying down Polysporin since it was all he had, and covering it with gauze. He worked on it meticulously, making sure every inch was as clean as he could get it, and covering it up as well as he could.
When he was finished, he slowly lowered her t-shirt and sat down beside her.
"Thank you," she whispered after a long silence.
He nodded his head and fell backward to lie down beside her, since he'd used all his energy in cleaning her wound.
Bella slowly turned to face him then as she got up and leaned over him. She grabbed the disinfectant and the Polysporin and she slowly started cleaning the cuts on his face. She dabbed at his cheeks and his lips, grabbing his hands to place them in her lap, disinfecting the cuts and wrapping his hands with gauze.
When both their wounds had been properly tended to, they lay side by side, entwining their fingers, laying their heads down, and falling asleep, finding comfort in the presence of the other and desperately hoping they would once again find the will to build up their strength and escape like they had intended to.
They now knew where the exit was…they just needed to get there.
Reviews get a teaser for the next chapter!
I have a rec this week! I was rec'ed Rabbit Heart by KitsuShel and even though there are only two chapters posted so far...it looks very promising! KitsuShel is the author of Parachute which I'm sure many of you have already read...and if you haven't...well...you should. Anyway...check out Rabbit Heart if you're interested.
Here's the summary: When a stalker gets too close to rockstar Izzy Dwyer, she makes a choice that brings her back to her hometown and leads her on a journey full of new love and friendships.