Chapter 25

"I'm so glad you're back," Hermione said the next day as they walked around the garden of the Burrow.

"I'm sorry I wasn't here. I heard what they did to you and I wish I had been here now. What they did was unforgivable."

"It was...stressful at the time," Hermione admitted.

"I can't believe they let him out of prison. Sometime I wonder what is wrong with these people."

Hermione had never heard such a divisive statement about the wizarding community from Harry before. "They just work under archaic laws."

"Laws reflect a society, Mione, and they put up with those laws because that is what they want." Harry kicked a bit of dirt with his toe. "And now they are holding you hostage."

Harry reflected exactly the way she used to feel and it was nice that someone else believed it was cause for being angry and not just ready to chalk it up as bad luck.

"I've realised some things while I was away," he said looking back at her. "They'll never understand us, you know. They are insular and stuck in the past, and they will never see that there is a big world out there, one much, much larger and more complex than this," he said waving around. "And it is moving so fast. We straddle both. We see things very differently and they never will."

Harry's travel certainly had changed his perspective. He'd been so negative on the muggle world and Hermione couldn't blame him considering his subjection to the awful Dursleys.

"We'll never be muggles," Hermione said.

"But we'll never be wizards like them either."

Hermione studied him. He'd changed more than she'd expected. Hermione wondered if a bitterness had settled into Harry. She also wondered if it had anything to do with him losing his wand and not replacing it. Losing one's wand would be the scariest thing in the world. But then Harry had a tendency to face down the things that scared him and she loved him for that. She wondered if he had lost his wand so much as left it behind.

"You should come with me, Mione. We don't have to stay here."

Hermione frowned, "I kind of do." It was complicated and she didn't want to talk about it. "Oscar..." She didn't know how to finish. "I have to think of Oscar now."

"And growing up completely immersed in this society isn't going to do him any favors."

Ron came over and joined them. "What are you talking about?"

"You know, muggle stuff." Harry said and Ron rolled his eyes.

"There is a quidditch match on next week." Ron said. "We should get some tickets."

Harry considered Ron for a while, then smiled. "Sure."

Hermione was almost pleased with the interruption because the conversation had turned to an uncomfortable topic. The things at home were uncomfortable enough without discussing them with Harry. She hadn't sorted out her own mind. She knew that staying at the Burrows was delaying having to deal with Lucius. It wasn't the reason she was here, but it was a side effect.

Her stomach still flipped when she thought of him and the things they'd done. She still wanted him and would be there right now if she knew things would be easy with him. But this was Lucius and nothing was ever easy with him. She wasn't stupid enough to think that her sleeping with him would change that. He was damaged and complicated, and likely she had just made it worse by bringing sex into the equation. She just wasn't sure she had any choice.

Ron went on to rehash the entire quidditch league and the events since Harry left.

Hermione left them to it and went to see to Oscar, who was watching Molly bake.

"How are things at home?" Molly asked.

"Good," Hermione responded automatically. "Well, they're not bad, only complicated." Hermione picked up a cookie and nibbled on it.

"I hope he's not hurting you," Molly said seriously.

Hermione choked. Only in the way I liked, she perversely said in her head before she could help herself. "No," she said. "He isn't hurting me, unless you count sheer surliness."

"I do worry about you."

"I know," Hermione said and stroked Molly on the shoulders. "Don't worry, I can handle him." Maybe if she told herself that, it would be true. Hah.

Hermione looked out the window at the two men that had been her friends for more than half her life. Harry had changed. She didn't recognise some of these things in him. These years away had changed him in more ways than one.

Hermione got home later than evening. Oscar was getting tired and Hermione decided that it was a good time to leave.

She joined Lucius in the dining room after Oscar had fallen asleep.

"And how is Mr. Potter?" Lucius asked as she entered the room.

"Older." She didn't know what to say. There was something different about Harry, but Lucius wasn't the one she could talk to about it.

She looked at the man sitting next to her. She couldn't deny that it was awkward being there with him. She didn't regret it though. Even though she had trouble working out exactly what it is she wanted, she wanted more and that would be a good starting point. The problem was that she didn't see a path forward. You'd figure the hurdle was passed, but it really wasn't. He had succumbed to his own desire and he'd needed it more than anyone she knew, but it hadn't solved anything.

She still had no idea what he felt. He hid his feelings so well.

"Your invitation has arrived for the Ministry's celebration of the recovery efforts," he said.

"Did you get one?"

"Yes. It has been thrown together quite hastily. I wonder if your friend Potter's return has brought about this urgency." His tone told that he didn't just suspect it, he knew it. Hermione was also pleased that he was being included more and more into the wizarding events. As perhaps was right as he had effectively funded the recovery through the reparations he'd been forced to pay. She was pleased for him, but also for herself as it gave her a means of extricating herself from this situation. It would be more difficult to do so if he was entirely alone with no prospects of being anything but. That was what had been, but things were changing and he was slowly being adopted back into his own community.

"Will you go?" she asked.

He was quiet for a while. "I haven't decided."

"I think you should."

Saying good night that evening was even more awkward as there was a part of her that wanted to go in the other direction from the one that was obviously before them-that of separating. She could imagine a point where they spent the nights together. They would retreat to their room, be together.

She felt herself heat just thinking about it.

"Lucius?" he called as he moved down the corridor leading to his room. He turned to acknowledge her, but in the moment she couldn't think of what to say. What was she supposed to say, 'Would you mind terribly if I turned up naked in your room again?'.

"Yes, Miss Granger," he said in his usual cool drawl.

She started to say something, but couldn't form any coherent words. Until panic got her. "I am glad you got an invitation to the Ministry's event. It is a good sign." You wuzz, she kicked herself mentally. It was different propositioning him in the dark, but it what a whole different thing in the light.

He nodded and continued walking. Hermione suppressed a disappointed groan. He wasn't helping at all. She'd hesitated and she had now missed the point where things could have gone different-not that she could see a way of it actually happening. She watched his retreating back.

Hermione got a note from Harry the next morning asking her to meet him at the Leaky Cauldron.

"I haven't been here is years," Harry said as he joined her in a booth. He looked good. He was tanned and relaxed. "Nothing has changed has it? Then again nothing does around here, does it?"

"Not unless it was destroyed in the war."

"But it's interesting that they build it back exactly as it was."

"How were your travels?" Hermione said in an attempt to change the conversation. "You must have seen some interesting things."

"India was awesome."

"I'd like to go some time."

"Then why don't you? Go with me, let's just go."

"I can't," Hermione said. She was surprised that Harry didn't quite grasp her situation. "Harry..."

"We're the same, Mione. We have the best of both world and we can travel between them. You don't want to be stuck here, and Oscar would be better off growing up learning to do the same. Come with me, Mione."

Hermione wasn't entirely sure what he was propositioning and it was all too difficult to even try to get her head around it.

"You're not staying?"

She searched his eyes for a while as he seemed to search hers back. Then he shook his head. "Come with me."

"I can't," she said in barely more than a whisper.

He clenched his first and swore. "Look, Lucius Malfoy is an evil bastard. He belongs in prison and that is where he needs to be. You're only here because he forced you. You were right to leave. I didn't understand it at first, but you were right. You'll never truly be happy here-neither of us will. The whole world is open for us, we need to go. I still have a great deal of sway here, we can work it so Malfoy is put in his proper place, then you're free."

Hermione felt a stab of concern at Harry's suggestion. She knew prison would destroy Lucius.

"Harry, it's complicated..."

Harry studied her for a bit.

"The bastard," Harry said with a cold chuckle. "He made you care about him, didn't he? Can't you see how evil he is? This is what he does, it's part of his scheme, Mione. He wants control over you and he'll use anything to get it."

"It isn't like that, Harry."

"Isn't it? Are you sure, Mione? I think you're forgetting who you're dealing with. God, Mione. I think I came back just in time. He is a wily thing isn't he? You can't be foolish, Mione. This is Lucius Malfoy, he is not capable of love."

"Harry.." she started to argue. "Things aren't that black and white."

"Yes they are, you've just lost your bearings."