A/N: Ahhhhhhh I'm so excited for this chapter I have waited for a long time.

So enjoy my friends.

Disclaimer: I don't own Big time rush

Chapter: 25

Screams and cries.

That's all he could hear around him while he tried to open the door. He pulled and pulled but the door didn't open. He didn't give up, the person that have love him all his life was inside, slowly dying. He could see the flames starting up, his body was filling hotter and his heart beating faster but nothing was stopping him.

"No…no please…please!" He cried pulling the door harder using all his strength tears falling from his eyes. The flames were getting bigger burning the metal and the smell of death making his body shake with sobs. He felt strong arms wrapped around him pulling him away from the car.

"No…please let me go!" He pleaded trying to get away from the hands.

"Come on kid I got to get you away from the car." The man behind him said pulling harder.

"NO!"

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Carlos snapped out of his trace and wiped a tear that had fallen down his cheek. More memories came flooding back and he just want to scream, to cry, to die.

Maybe everything would be better if he die, maybe James, Logan and Kendall would be happy again. He was just a trouble person that should not be here, he should be six-feet-under.

It was all his fault, he make his family life a living hell he knew it.

He let her die, he could have tried harder, he could have opened the door and he is never going to forgive himself ever.

Carlos looked at the knife on his hand the moon light reflecting on it. He looked at his wrapped arm and took of the gauge letting it fall on the floor and look at his arm.

Should he do it?

Who's going to care anyway?

He dragged the blade in his wrist and watched the crimson blood slowly slide down his wrist.

XXXXX

Logan woke up by hearing whimpers and pained moans on the shelter. He opened his eyes and rose up he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes and looked around for the source that cause the noises.

"James?" He called with concerned when he saw his friend turning and moaning. He moved his hand forward and started shook his tall friend.

"No d-don't hurt him…" James mumbled on his sleep while he turned again kicking his feet.

"James woke up." The boy pleaded while hearing James whimpered in his sleep and started shaking him harder trying to shake his friend out of his nightmare.

"Carlos!" James screamed eyes flying open and he rose up quickly looking around while he gasp for air and tears come down his faces all at the same time.

"Dude calm down it was just a dream." Logan said rubbing the boy back but he suddenly noticed that the boy had started crying his body shacking with each sob. "Shh…it's okay, it's over know…" The brunet said wrapping his arms around the tall boy letting him cried on his chest while he rubbed James' back.

"What's going on?"

Logan turned around still holding an upset James and saw Kendall sitting up and rubbing his eyes. The blond blinked several times and stared at the two boys with confusion and concern.

"Why is James crying?" Kendall asked concerned scooting closer toward his friends and putted a comforting hand on the boy shoulder.

"He had a nightmare" Logan replied the blond.

"Aw was it bad buddy?" Kendall asked rubbing the boy arm, James nodded while crying.

"S-someone w-was…b-beating C-carlos in my d-dream…."James replied clutching Logan for dear life. "I c-couldn't do a-anything to s-stop it." James said sniffling and burying his face further on Logan's chest. Logan and Kendall exchanged glazes.

"Where is Carlos?" Kendall asked looking around not finding him anywhere, Logan looked around afraid, remembering how Carlos was acting earlier, he turned his gazed to his pocket slowly stinking his hand inside of it his eyes going wide when he found nothing.

"Oh no…" he whispered.

"What?" Kendall asked his eyes wide too.

"Stay here okay." He said taking James arms away from and standing up and making his way outside but he was stop by a strong arms on his shoulder. He turned around to see Kendall face drained of colors.

"If he is making something stupid stop him okay." Logan nodded and grabbed the flashlight and walked outside. He moved the flashlight around nervously even he could see that the sun was starting to come out. "Where are you?" he muttered to himself, suddenly he saw a shiny thing moving, he walked closer and his eyes went wide.

"Carlos dropped that!" he demanded when he saw Carlos with the knife moving it across he wrist. The boy didn't listen instead bringing it up toward his face toward his lip but before he could do anything Logan yanked the knife away from him.

"Hey I was using it!" Carlos exclaimed standing up fire in his eyes.

"Now you are not." Logan said holding the knife tighter while Carlos walked closer to him.

"Let me tell you something there is no place where you can hide it where I can't find it." Carlos said coldly looking at Logan dead in the eye.

"It's that a challenge?"

Carlos groaned and launched forward to grab the knife but Logan shoved him backwards and limped toward the water.

"Hey where do you think you are going?" Carlos yelled angrily running toward the pale boy, he eyes going wide when he saw Logan moving his hand back and throwing the knife on the water with all his strength. Logan turned around and putted his hand on his hips.

Carlos stared at Logan with angered and before he knew it, he was running tackling Logan to the ground completely forgetting the bite on the other boy leg.

Logan trashed around trying to get the Latino away from him but he was stranded him his hand pinned on each side of his head.

"Let me go!" Logan screamed filling the boy blood dropping on his own arm.

"No! Until you say you are sorry!"

"I'm not sorry!

"You should be!"

"Oh my god! Carlos when are you going to admit that you need help? Look at you! Look how this is changing you!" Logan screamed he stopped his trashing and looked at Carlos in the eye.

"I don't need help!" Carlos screamed angrily his gripped on Logan wrist getting tighter making the boy whimpered.

"Carlos y-you are hurting me." Logan whimpered tears going down his face, Carlos face soften but before he could react he was tackled on the ground by someone. He trashed violently and it took a minute for the person to finally pinned the angry Latino on the ground.

"Let me go Kendall!" Carlos screamed at the top of his lungs.

"Not until you tell me what's going on?"

"No!"

"Then I'm not moving." Kendall said crossing his arms over his chest still stranding Carlos. The boy tried to pull him off but he was filling too weak to do it so he just stopped and looked at the sky. Kendall sighed and looked up at Logan who was being pulled to his feet by James. "Carlos…" the boy looked up at him and Kendall swears he heard his heart breaking the boy just looked so broken so dead inside.

"I-I'm sorry so sorry for being so selfish I know you think I hate you but I don't I love you…" Kendall said tears sliding down his face.

"But I hurt you." Carlos said in a quiet voice.

"I-I…Carlos that doesn't matter right know that only one that matter is you…" Kendall said in a softer voice Carlos gulped feeling a painful not on his throat. "I just want to understand…I just want to know what's wrong…I want to protect you."

"You can't protect from everything especially from my-self."

"I know that but I would do everything I can...I would even give my life for you…"

"I'm not worth that…" Carlos said softly the knot to painful to talk louder. Kendall breath hitched on his throat, he took a deep breath to composed himself and not break down completely.

"Please don't say that you are worth everything." Kendall said sweetly but Carlos just shook his head unable to form words. The blond sighed and took his weight off of Carlos and gently sitting up him up.

"It's true."

Carlos turned toward the voice and saw James and Logan walking toward them and sitting around Carlos

"Look how bad we get when you get sad…you are like our sunshine…" James said dropping his arm around the boy shoulder, his pale face tear stained.

"…and more importantly we want our brother back." Logan commented voice breaking and he wiped his tears away. Carlos looked down tears coming to his eyes. Kendall gently grabbed Carlos hand.

"What's going on?" Kendall asked softly, Carlos took a deep breath but a tear came out and James started to rub his shoulder.

"Is it us?" Kendall asked but Carlos shook his head.

"Is it Antonio?" James guessed, this time Carlos bit his lip tears pouring out at a rapid pace.

"Is it your mom?" A whimpered came out of Carlos lip but everyone where shocked when the next question was Carlos breaking point.

"Is it your dad?" Kendall asked softly and this time a sod scape from Carlos mouth, his hand flew to his face to muffled his sobs but it didn't work.

"Come hear buddy you need a hug." Kendall said spreading his arm, Carlos launched forward and wrapped his arm around Kendall skinny frame and stared to sob even harder on Kendall chest. James and Logan moved forward to wrapping their arms around the two making it a group hug.

The guys started to cry too folding Carlos tighter in the hug letting him cried.

Finally the walls were knocked down and Carlos finally broke down.

XXXXX

A/N: FINALLY after making you guys wait so much.

So what do you think? What is Carlos dad doing? Oh and by the way Antonio is Carlos brother.

Hope you like it and review :)

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