Title: Timing
Date: May 6, 2014
Thanks for the reviews and all the support! I want to apologize again for last chapters wait… but at least this update was a lot faster! Cheers!
The Observations of Kawamura Takashi
Love wasn't hard to spot.
It came with many symptoms, such as: elevated body temperature, the dancing stomach butterflies, weak knees and eyes for that one special person. And perhaps not so evident was the phenomenon that accompanied the act of falling so utterly and completely in love. But for Kawamura Takashi, these signs were as clear as a cloudless sky. Because it was something the young sushi chef saw on a regular basis.
His parents were a prime example with their heavy displays of affection. And although it was always a little awkward seeing his parents kiss, he never once complained. Because after years of marriage, the triumphs and hardships, the highs and lows… they were still very much in love. And now that his father was semi-retired, his parents became inseparable.
Now although he couldn't help but admire them, he couldn't help but feel that twinge of reasonable jealousy every time they finished each other's sentences, those special reserved smiles that seemed to mirror each other, and how they didn't need to hold each other's hand to walk at the same pace, all the while forgetting the world around them. Because he wanted that kind of romance… he wanted to find that one special person… the love of his life. And in a world filled with billions of people, he didn't think it would be so hard finding that person. Then in a country filled with over a hundred million people, he didn't think he would be without that. Not that there weren't any opportunities…
While attending Chosaku secondary school, he had a few girlfriends and the odd boyfriends… although, they never lasted. His priority would always be his father's restaurant. And it became his main focus all throughout high school, while all his friends were falling in love and living out their youth. And at graduation it finally dawned on him: He was going to be working full time at the restaurant. He wasn't going to get any more chances of finding a love like that shared between his father and mother.
So it came as a surprise when he met with a familiar face… and not just anyone's.
In middle school, he always had an infatuation with Fuji Shusuke… but who didn't? It was like the entire school populace had a silent understanding that at some point they were each going to develop a major crush on the blue eyed brunet for an unspecified amount of time and at some unannounced point in time. It was like an unofficial Seishun Gakuen rite of passage. But no one ever acted on their feelings, because Fuji always appeared so… unavailable. (There was that one moment in their junior year when Fuji was dating a childhood friend. It was a long distance relationship that never really amounted to much, and from his knowledge the breakup was mutual.)
Then after graduating from Seishun Gakuen, they lost contact sometime midway their first years as freshman at different high schools… There weren't any real excuses. Although he did struggle to juggle his studies, baseball club practice and the restaurant. Life happened. And he always assumed Fuji was also swamped with everything high school had to offer… Although, he did hear the rumours. Rumours that Seigaku's former prodigy was in some illicit teacher-student relationship. But he dismissed them all. After all, they were only rumours… right? It was almost ridiculous, because he knew Fuji Shusuke wasn't that kind of person. So it was pointless to even talk about it, let alone think about it. And then eventually the rumours stopped, and that was the terribly lonely moment when Kawamura thought for sure that Fuji Shusuke would forever be gone from his life…
Until he wasn't.
And he remembered it like it was yesterday: the restaurant was as busy as usual and he barely had a minute to look up from behind the prep bar. Shige (a part-timer) was standing in front of him, leaning forward slightly to whisper that some customers wanted to speak to him… and his heart dropped. Were they complaining? Did he do something wrong? And he lifted his head to peek over towards the corner Shige was subtly pointing, and his eyes widened.
Because Fuji Shusuke was smiling back at him with that painfully pretty smile he remembered from middle school, as though sitting there on the other side of the restaurant completely unannounced was absolutely normal. And he remembered the way Kikumaru's voice rang out to him, calling him over and he thought that maybe this was fate. Maybe it was Fuji all along… Maybe Fuji Shusuke has always been the great love of his life.
But this Fuji Shusuke was a little different from the Fuji Shusuke he remembered. He seemed more mature, more self-assured, more lovely… and their few years apart transformed the blue eyed brunet into something more wonderful. But at a cost… as he became so blatantly aware of. Because with Fuji Shusuke came Atobe Keigo.
The same Atobe Keigo who completely destroyed another fellow human being's arm without so much as a flinch. The former captain of Hyotei's tennis team, known back in the day to be an utter terror… not really all that much different from today…
"Keigo's irreplaceable. He's just very dear to me." Fuji had once explained to him in a thoughtful voice that was so very sweet. In words that were carefully pronounced, allowing each syllable to fall off his tongue like honey… the way Fuji's voice dripped like he was savouring each and every word, and the way his lips curved into a breathtakingly beautiful smile…
Beautiful.
Lovely… and there was an infinite amount of words he could use that couldn't quite describe just how wonderful Fuji Shusuke has always been.
Irritating.
It was only a small itch… that quiet nagging voice screaming in the back of his head. But this was Fuji Shusuke, and no flaw could ever be big enough to deter him. Dating the Fuji Shusuke seemed too good to be true. It was like a dream! A dream he never wanted to wake up from. But this was reality and he had responsibilities. He had to prioritize the family restaurant, because it wasn't just his purpose and achievement, but it was the pride of his family. So he had to ask the tough questions…
And he asked Kikumaru if maybe Atobe was in love with Fuji.
But the redhead couldn't give him a straight answer. Because Kikumaru Eiji wasn't the same Kikumaru Eiji he knew from Seishun Gakuen. And the two people he always assumed would have forever continued on being the best of friends… simply weren't. And that was the end of that conversation.
So he asked Atobe.
And the look on the former Hyotei captain's face was indescribable. It was one of brief disbelief, amusement and… disgust. And Atobe openly laughed in his face, not bothering with an answer as he slammed the door to his and Fuji's Shirokane apartment.
"Is something wrong?" That melodious, sweetly hushed voice interrupted his thoughts.
And he blinked up into the deepest pools of sapphire blue, "N-No. I was just thinking…"
"About?" Fuji hummed, a faint almost teasing smirk playing on his lips.
"Why'd you move out of your house?" He wondered, remembering the Fuji family home to be spacious enough for a medium sized family.
"Hm…" He could almost hear the gears turning inside of Fuji's head, "… I guess it wasn't my home anymore."
He frowned.
"Well, you know about my father…" Fuji reminded, "And with my baby nephew, Yumiko-nee's been busy with her own family. So her visits were getting less frequent. Yuuta wanted to attend high school in Nagoya. He was always my father's favourite, maybe because Yuuta still gave him the time of day… And my mom… it was decided best for her if my aunt takes care of her. She actually lives in Paris now. So the house got sold."
"Oh… Sorry." He felt sheepish. He knew Fuji's family life was less than perfect since back in middle school. He supposed not much has changed.
The brunet offered a small smile, silken lips angled slightly in the most beautiful smile he had ever seen that just begging to be kissed. And he could feel himself lean forward.
"It worked out really well." Fuji jerked his head away in a reflexive move.
And he could feel a frown make its way onto his face.
Did Fuji always use to be so… aloof? … So on edge?
It was as if during their time apart, Fuji had developed haphephobia… a fear of being touched. It was odd… but he dismissed it as a part of who Fuji Shusuke matured into. And as Fuji's boyfriend, he had to embrace everything there was about the blue eyed brunet. Just like how his parents have embraced each other's good qualities as well as flaws.
"Keigo and I became really good friends and… he's just been wonderful." Fuji quirked his lips.
He leaned back, "How did that even happen? Remember back in middle school after our match against Hyotei? I thought you hated the guy… especially after what he did to Tezuka-buchou."
Fuji's smile softened, "For the longest time, he was the only person who'd still talk to me."
"Huh?" He frowned, not fully understanding.
"High school drama." There was an odd smile covering Fuji's lips, "In the end, he was the only person I had left. So when he suggested I move in, it felt right. Although, it wasn't like I had a choice. He practically forced me to move in… but it was all for the better."
"For the better, huh?" He repeated.
Fuji's smile dimmed, "Sorry… but I swear you don't need to be jealous. I promise that I don't love him in that way. He's more like family."
"Except he's not." He pointed out.
He could tell that Fuji was biting his tongue. Atobe Keigo was probably the one topic they would never agree on. Because although he found their relationship more than a little strange, Fuji and Atobe had a relationship he would never understand. And according to Fuji: Atobe was like family. That meant that Atobe was irreplaceable, while he had yet to kiss let alone hold hands with the brunet without having Fuji flinch. There was no point in starting an argument.
And his eyes fell on the honey haired brunet once more… watching as Fuji delicately sipped from his teacup. Then he trailed his gaze down from the creamy white skin of Fuji's exposed neck, over slender shoulders, down thin arms and landing on those piano-player like fingers.
He reached forward and took a hold of that smaller hand.
It jerked back, but he kept a firm hold, intertwining their fingers together.
And he waited patiently for that rigid hand to relax in his grip.
So he closed his eyes and counted down… 5… 4… 3… The subtle aroma of vanilla mixed seasoned apples wafting up his nostrils. And he could feel his chest tighten wonderfully, because this was Fuji Shusuke. This was the same Fuji he knew from Seishun Gakuen. The same Fuji who emitted that delicate fragrance… 2… 1… And he could feel those slender fingers loosen. That was all that was needed… Just patience and… He could feel the bridge of his nose crinkle at the faint scent of lavenders, cedar and tobacco.
"Kawamura?"
He cracked an eye open upon hearing his name.
And he couldn't stop the grin from forming on his face, "Oishi! It's been so long!"
"Tell me about it… Probably since middle school graduation." His former vice-captain laughed, "Talk about a small world."
And his eyes travelled towards Oishi's left side, "Tezuka-buchou."
He could feel those bronze orbs dig into him, "Kawamura."
"It's been a while." He nodded respectfully; his admiration for his former captain would always be strong.
Tezuka returned the nod, "It has."
"Are you here on a date? Who's the-" Oishi paused mid-sentence.
"Hello." Fuji's voice was uncharacteristically venomous that he had to do a double take. And he really took a strong minute to scrutinize the blue eyed brunet. This wasn't the Fuji Shusuke from his memories, but a part of the present Fuji Shusuke. And there was something about Fuji's smile that looked a little off… if anything, it looked more like a smirk than anything else.
"Fuji." Oishi's voice was equally steely.
And he really had to wonder just what the hell happened at Marei Gakuen.
"Oh by the way Kawamura," Oishi's forest green eyes rounded on him once more, "If you want my advice, I'd break up with this guy here if I were you. You've always been a nice guy. You shouldn't be dating someone with no morals."
"No morals?" Fuji snorted while tapping a slender index finger against the table they sat at, "Because you're such a wonderful example… Cheating on Eiji and all."
"Don't you dare say his name." Oishi looked livid.
"Eiji's my friend." Fuji pointed out with an almost devilish smirk growing on that pretty face, "I'm actually seeing him tonight. Do you want to come along?"
"Even though we broke up, I still care about him… I always will." Oishi's voice was firm, "I don't know how you deceived and tricked him into becoming your friend again, but don't you dare try to ruin his life for a second time. Eiji's got a big family. You're not allowed to take your pick at them."
"That's enough." Tezuka called out in a dangerously severe tone. And despite the increasing awkwardness of this situation, he couldn't help but be reminded of their days spent at Seigaku. Because the impression of that reliable, austere captain remained consistent with the russet haired brunet. And he remembered those blistering hot days… all those times Tezuka ordered laps around the courts. And he wished he could go back to when everything was perfect.
But a silence heavily blanketing their corner of the café.
Tearing his eyes away from his former captain, he turned towards Oishi. And he could still see the look of disapproval in those green eyes, but his former vice-captain was holding his tongue in check. And the sound of Fuji's finger tapping against the tabletop stopped. So he directed his attention to the blue eyed brunet and remembered something else:
There was a look in those profound azure coloured eyes… something akin to a glimmer. A melting softness that tugged at his heart strings. An infinitely gentle expression that was always reserved for the Seigaku captain alone…
And sure he was jealous of Atobe Keigo. Who wouldn't be? He was indescribably close to the brunet he was dating. It was only natural, but… Atobe was out of the question. Because he remembered sitting on the bleachers, cheering for his teammates as they rallied the ball across the court. The look that was always shared between his then captain and the then prodigy… and that all too familiar feeling of utter defeat. Because there was something there… something so undeniable, strong and everlasting. Something like…
A light chime cut through the silence like a knife against butter.
"That would be me." Fuji mumbled, pulling out his cellphone and tapping on the screen.
And a new expression covered the brunet's face… a look of utter glee and happiness. A beautiful expression that haunted his nightmares since the moment Fuji returned into his life. Because it was a look reserved for Atobe Keigo.
"Is that Matsuo-sensei?" Oishi's voice didn't lose its cold touch.
"Oishi." Tezuka warned.
"Or Atobe?" Oishi continued, "It was big news when you transferred schools. Even bigger when you moved in with the guy who destroyed Tezuka's arm. Are you still living with the creep?"
He practically jumped back in surprise as Fuji suddenly stood up, slamming both his hands against the table. And those usually bright sapphire-like eyes were hardened… it was a look he had only witnessed a handful of times. It was a resolute expression reminiscent of when Fuji borrowed his tennis racquet after his devastating tie with Hyotei's Kabaji or the time Fuji firmly held his own racquet wrapped in new grip tape during his match against Rikkai's Kirihara. This Fuji Shusuke wasn't to be messed with.
"… Am I still living with the creep?" Fuji repeated in a threateningly calm voice, "… Listen, if I ever dated sensei then it wasn't any of your business. So you can talk… go ahead, call me names. But don't you dare speak that way about Keigo. He's infinitely more of a man than you will ever be. And compared to your unwarranted sense of over-morality, you're nothing compared to him."
There was a whiff of vanilla apples, tinged with lavenders, cedar and distinctive tobacco, as Fuji Shusuke walked pass them and out the café doors. He quickly darted his eyes from Oishi to Tezuka to the door then back to the pair.
"I'm really sorry… but I should go catch up with him." He bowed apologetically.
"You shouldn't be the one apologizing." Oishi offered a comforting smile.
"It was nice seeing you both again." He quickly waved before darting out the door and after the brunet.
And it wasn't hard catching up with the blue eyed brunet. But he was still out of breath, his adrenaline on high and pumping throughout his veins. And Fuji offered him a reassuring smile, as they continued down the sidewalk. Walking in a comfortable silence, as he worked to catch his breath. And he really had to wonder what the hell happened. What happened while he was separated at Chosaku?
Because he remembered a time when they all stood together. Their bond undeniable. All nine of them, clad in their blue and white jerseys. Tall, bright and glorious. The steps they took together... walking on the same path as one, playing as one, breathing as one... And it never occurred to him, that maybe... maybe one day, they'd split onto their own paths. And things that are broken can never truly return to what it once was. And…
He realized something.
Fuji's steps were slower than his own. An almost languid saunter, as if the brunet had all the time in the world... a carefree bounce to his steps that was so like and unlike the Fuji Shusuke he knew. Or perhaps, his steps were too fast. Because throughout the years, he had grown accustomed to the hustle and bustle of his restaurant... or perhaps, it was the both of them.
He shook his head... He was driving himself crazy. This is silly... thinking about footsteps of all things. There were no hidden meanings behind that or that overwhelming scent of lavenders, cedar and tobacco. The way Fuji spoke in that familiar soft and airy voice that had always left him feeling breathless... the way Fuji would now elongate his words, as though relishing the way each syllable fell off his tongue... the way Fuji would smile so beautifully, but with that slight very slight almost maddening tilt to his alluring lips.
"Thanks for walking me home. Do you want to come in?" Fuji's silken voice interrupted his thoughts, as he registered where they stood... in front of the gorgeous frosted white bricked complex, home to a large penthouse on the highest floor that he visited a countless number of times since reacquainting with his lovely honey haired brunet. Because sometime during his isolation at Chosaku, Fuji's house supposedly wasn't his house anymore. And the brunet had explained all the reasons… Yet something was missing from the story… And he had heard all the rumours. And then there were those harsh words that came out of Oishi's mouth… But Fuji would tell him in time… right?
They strode across marble flooring; the heel of Fuji's shoes tapping quietly in that steady leisured pace. Stopping as they entered the lobby, greeted by a nameless doorman that welcomed the brunet home... It was the typical luxurious Shirokane apartment complex...
"Did the mail come in yet?" Fuji questioned, his words melting off his tongue like sweet honey.
"The young master has already collected it." The suited worker informed politely with a slight bow to his head.
And he didn't miss the way Fuji's back straightened. The way those profound sapphire-like eyes sparkled with a different kind of shine. And the way that smile seemed to glow in an enchanting and the most ethereally magnificent smile he ever had the pleasure to witness. The certain delightful spring to his steps, as they made their way to the elevator.
Doors opened and that familiar feeling of foreshadowing came over him like a dark cloud.
"You're back!" Fuji's voice was laced with excitement and something else, "I didn't even plan anything… You didn't even tell me! … I just got your text right now too. You said your plane was coming in tomorrow. When did you even buy a plane ticket?"
And he watched as those arms surrounded his boyfriend in a tight embrace… the way Fuji didn't flinch.
Then he remembered his first time meeting Fuji Shusuke after a long time. The brightly smiling honey haired brunet that stumbled into his family's restaurant, capturing his attention in its entirety and would tug in that all too familiar way at his heart like he did in the past. That memorable playful grin that settled on that dollish face, stealing his breath in one fatal swoop... But Fuji wasn't alone. Because on one side stood Kikumaru Eiji, who greeted him with a tight hug as if all those years apart and the distance in their relationship meant absolutely nothing once they were together again. And on Fuji's other side stood Atobe Keigo.
The former Hyotei Gakuen captain, arrogant and malicious. The same Atobe Keigo who aggressively dragged out that match against his respected former captain... Fuji's precious captain... and the consequences that arose. And he didn't question that silently hostile presence or the way those callously slate gray eyes kept following him with a severe intensity that was both uncomfortable and invasive. Because this was Fuji's precious friend… Fuji's most special person.
"It's some sort of long weekend in the States. So I wanted to surprise you." Atobe's voice held its usual stifling tone, his words rolling off his tongue in an untailored, dawdling speech. It always sounded as though he was relishing the sound of his own voice… fitting considering his narcissism.
"You still should have told me. I would have gotten home sooner." Fuji had his lips puckered. And seeing the two interact reminded him that he was now the third-wheel.
He could feel that all too chilling penetrating gaze fixated upon him, "I didn't want to interrupt your date. Right, Kawamura?"
"... Right." He offered a short nod, unable to ease his growing anxiety.
"Oh!" Fuji sounded, "How rude of me! Taka-san come in and sit down, I should make some tea since we didn't quite enjoy our stay at the café to the fullest… Oh! I went out for lunch yesterday with Sara-san. She gave me a bundle of dried rose buds and hips from the garden. It's your favourite tea, right?"
He could feel his voice caught in his throat, because Fuji wasn't speaking to him.
"That's right." Atobe announced, walking side by side the blue eyed brunet in that same leisured pace.
"What will you be having Taka-san?" And Fuji directed that bright smile at him.
And he could feel the intensity of sharp slate coloured eyes against him, "… Anything will do."
"Alright." Fuji shrugged before disappearing into the kitchen.
And he followed the Harvard student into the living room, making sure to walk a few steps behind the dark haired man as if he were some sort of dangerous feral animal. Watching as Atobe sauntered in that all too casual pace, almost as if he had no worries and all the time in the world. And he kept his eyes trained on the dark haired man, as Atobe took a seat on the far end of the long L-shaped leather sofa. He sat down on the opposite end, shifting awkwardly into the cushioning.
"And no sugar?" Fuji's chirped from somewhere in the nearby kitchen.
"Of course." Atobe drawled, those unsettling steady gray eyes staring directly at him.
"Taka-san, how about you?" Fuji's voice called out.
"… I'll take the sugar." He replied uneasily.
And those penetrating slate coloured eyes continued to bore into him.
"So Atobe... How's Harvard?" He questioned, hoping to alleviate the increasingly overbearing pressure from the former Hyotei captain's presence.
"Wonderful." Atobe replied languidly.
"... Great." He nodded, the silence blanketing him in a suffocating embrace.
"Sorry for the wait." Fuji's reappearance instantly brought out a huge sigh of relief from within him.
And he watched as the honey haired brunet proceeded to place a bamboo tray carrying the tea set overtop the heavy glass coffee table, before taking a seat by his side… something he was grateful for and took a certain pride in. It felt like he had finally bested the former Hyotei captain. Although, when he glanced up to exchange his triumphant glance with the dark haired man, those callous gray eyes weren't pinpointed on him any more... and on Atobe's face was an irritatingly familiar smile…
… And it finally dawned on him.
Those slight almost non-existent changes… the way Fuji spoke in that languorous tone that relished every single word that fell off his tongue. The way Fuji walked in that leisured pace, as if he had all the time in the world. The constant faint smell of lavenders, cedar and cigarettes despite the fact that Fuji didn't smoke. The way he taps his index finger when impatient or irritated. The almost flippant way Fuji dealt with most people… a perfect mimicry of all those small details that Fuji Shusuke unconsciously made his own.
Then there was his smile… Almost unchanging, as if they were back in those unforgettable days spent as a close-knit team. The always enchanting way he curved his lips, the suppleness and sweetness of his smile... then that small almost mocking lopsided tilt to the corner of his lips.
Because there was a phenomenon that occurred that really wasn't so evident, because it was more of a slow changing process. His mother once told him that when she was young, she used to be quite the fashionista and was known throughout university as the girl who never wore the same outfit twice with differently painted nail each week. But since meeting his father, she subdued her look to match his to her present day more practical self. And as the son of a fisherman family, his father used to be rugged but had refined himself to meet his mother halfway. And throughout the years they continued to grow together, their habits shared and their smiles perfect mirrors of one another.
Fuji's unfamiliar quirks, the changes, that smile…
… They were all a mirrored reflection of one Atobe Keigo.
To be continued.
Note: So I wanted to write about how when people grow close, they start to adopt each other's characteristics. If you want, you can go back and read from Chapter 18 and try to spot all the small changes in Fuji's personality. Even harder might be if you try to spot changes to Atobe, if there are any… no more spoilers. By the way, please don't hate on Oishi too much because he really has no clue. I feel like Fuji's the type to keep these things hidden, and everyone else who knows (save for Atobe who's brain doesn't function like your average person) respects Fuji enough to the point that they're keeping it hushed since its Fuji's secret to share.
Well, I almost died writing this chapter… I'm really sleep deprived at the moment.
Thanks for reading!