A Wife for Sherlock Holmes

by tavingtonsbeauty

Seems impossible, but the man known as Sherlock Holmes is easily bored. That boredom drove him to the arms of a highly intelligent woman who could keep up with him both physically and mentally. However, when a child is thrown into the mix, Sherlock steps up, to the chagrin of the woman, and they marry. With so much baggage on both sides will it work or be a match made in hell.

25. From This Day Forward

A Wife for Sherlock Holmes

Chapter 25- From this Day Forward

ZzZ

Early evening – April 11th 2014

In a car outside a bank that was currently being robbed, Sally Donovan sat in the passenger seat with a laptop on her lap. The rooftop lights of nearby police cars were flashing and police officers were walking around. Greg sat beside her.

"You still blocking it?" Greg asked

"Yeah. Very efficiently hacked. They must be bloody pleased with themselves." Donovan said.

"They must be!" He smiled at her.

Armed police began to run into the bank. Greg and Sally were out of the car and Greg gestured to her as they followed the others.

"Right then?" Greg said.

"Oh, no! No, you've gotta make the arrest. This one's yours, boss." Sally said.

"You've never called me 'boss' before." Greg said looking at her.

"Ah, well, look what happens when you're good!"

They both grinned as they walk on.

"You know how most days aren't good days? This is a good day."

"Not for the Waters family." Sally said,

Greg's phone beeped a text alert. He looked down toward his pocket and grimaced, but then ignored it.

"Okay: ten men on the roof; all exits covered; the bank's closed, so there are no hostages to worry about ..." Sally continued.

Greg's phone beeped again. Again he grimaced and Sally looked round at him.

"Sorry, no, go on, go on." Greg said.

"Um, we've got the tunnel entrance covered; and Davies, Willard and Christie are heading up our Response on Mafeking Road." She continued.

Greg's phone beeped twice more. He took it from his pocket and stopped to look at it. "Sorry, I'd better get this."

Sally only paused a moment, but then continued. "It's him, isn't it?"

Greg's face filled with shock and something close to horror as he read the string of messages he has received:

HELP.

BAKER ST.

NOW.

HELP ME.

PLEASE.

He looked up at Sally. "I-I, I have to go."

She looked back at him. "What?!"

"You make the arrest."

"No way!"

"Sorry. You'll be fine. I'm-I'm-I'm cool with this."

"Jones'll get all the credit if you leave now! You know he will!"

Greg hesitated, clearly reluctant to give up his chance for success. "Yeah, but d... It doesn't matter. I have to go."

He turned and hurried away. Sally watched him for a moment, grimacing, then continued on with the other officers.

Outside, Greg was running for his car, making a phone call as he went. He barked into his phone. "Back-up. I need maximum back-up. Baker Street, now!" He got into his car and sped off.

ZzZ

Greg raced up the stairs and into the living room.

"What's going on?" Greg asked breathlessly.

Sherlock was sitting at the dining table looking at his laptop. The fingers of both his hands were pressed into his temples. "This is hard." Sherlock said piteously.

"What?"

"Really hard. Hardest thing I've ever had to do." Lowering his hands, he picked up a book and held it up to show Greg. The book is called 'How to write an unforgettable best man speech'. "Have you any funny stories about John?"

Greg stared at him in disbelief. Outside, police cars were sirening their way into Baker Street and screeching to a halt.

"What?!"

Putting the book down, Sherlock looked up at him. "I need anecdotes."He seemed to notice Greg's expression. "Didn't go to any trouble, did you?"

Greg stared at him, still breathing heavily. Outside, an ambulance was sirening its way up the road, and a helicopter could be heard approaching. Sherlock's eyes shifted sideways as he became aware of the noise outside, and the curtains in the open window behind him billowed inwards as the helicopter hovered lower. Sherlock looked round as the billowing curtains knocked some sheet music off its stand.

Greg closed his eyes in exasperation.

Marion walked out into the room holding Kerrin in her arms as he fussed. She was dressed in a dressing gown and had clearly had a bath not long ago. Lizzy came down and was rubbing her eyes as she walked into the room.

"Uncle Greg?" She asked sleepily.

He turned to her and smiled a little. "Oh hey…"

"Sherlock! What is going on?" Marion asked.

"I…" He turned to look at her palely. "I asked for help."

Greg held the little girl in his arms rocking her a little. "Next time tell me what it is for!" He said.

Marion looked at Greg and then looked out. "You called the special forces?"

"Ummmm yeah." Greg said. He lifted his radio. "Stand down." He ordered and after a few moments the group started to dissipate. He took a breath. "Marion. How are you?"

"Better now that my speech is done. However, my husband prefers to procrastinate." She said shooting him a look.

He grimaced. "It is not my fault I had other things to do."

"Like get drunk, other cases…" She sighed and sat down and bared a breast for Kerrin who latched on hungrily.

Greg shook his head. "It is tomorrow."

"I know!" Sherlock hissed. "I just need some more material…"

"Material? You have lived and worked with him for years and he is your best friend. I can't be that hard…" Marion said looking up at him.

"How as it so easy for you?" He asked. "You barely know her."

"I know a lot about Mary. We have done lunch a lot. I am even teaching her to belly dance." She smiled. "She is a very interesting person. So is John."

Greg kissed Lizzy's hair and then set her down. "Off to bed little bit."

"But…"

"Now now, you have a big day tomorrow. We all do." Greg said taking a breath. "Go on. I will have some treats for you tomorrow."

She giggled and ran up the stairs to her room.

Greg turned back. "Well I will leave you to it then." He moved to the door.

"Greg." Marion said standing up and walking to him. "Can I get you anything?" She asked putting a hand on his arm gently.

"No, it is fine, love." He smiled and kissed her cheek. He smiled. "See you tomorrow then."

She nodded and mouthed, sorry.

He nodded and smiled at her. "Take care of him…"

"I will. Thank you." She said and shut the door turning back to her husband as Greg retreated. She shook her head as he looked up at her.

"What?" He asked and turned back to his laptop.

She rolled her eyes and moved to finish nursing her infant son.

ZzZ

At 221B Baker Street, violin was playing and then joined by a second, playing a gentle waltz. Mrs. Hudson came out of 221A carrying a tray of tea things. She stopped, smiling with delight at the sound of the music, then went up the stairs.

The living room door was closed and she stopped outside for a moment, then opened the door. Inside, Sherlock wasn't playing his violin nor was Marion as she believed. Instead, wearing a camel colored dressing gown over his clothes, he was waltzing around the room on his own, holding Marion to him as they moved around the floor dancing in time to the music.

He glanced over his shoulder as his landlady walked in.

Marion followed his gaze.

"Shut up, Mrs. Hudson." Sherlock said.

"I haven't said a word." Mrs. Hudson said defensively.

Sherlock continued to move his wife about the floor. "You're formulating a question. It's physically painful watching you thinking." He stopped dancing lifting his wife's hand up as she spun away from him. She was already dressed in her beautiful dark lilac matron of honor dress. Her hair was in curlers and she had not yet put on her make-up. She smiled at Sherlock and straightened her top a little. The dress he been altered two days ago to her new measurements. She had even now started to have her old body back now that she could move again and do some yoga while frankly ignoring doctor's orders to take it easy. She still could overdo, but she was gaining her stamina again.

"I thought it was you playing." Mrs. Hudson said noticing his Ipod player on the table. "You and Marion."

"It was me playing." He said. "Marion was also playing. We did it this morning." He picked up a remote control, switched off the music player and bent down to make a notation on the sheet music lying on the table. "I am composing." He said. "Marion we will have to watch that point, make sure the sharp is there on the counter melody."

"Got it." She said.

Mrs. Hudson set the tray down beside what had been John's chair on a small table. "You were dancing." She smiled.

"I was road-testing." Sherlock said.

"You what?"

Sherlock threw down the pen he was holding and turned to her. "Why are you here?"

"I'm bringing you your morning tea." She poured some milk into the teacup. "You're not usually awake." She smiled. "Sometimes Marion is." She poured milk into another.

"I am grateful." Marion smiled as she sat down delicately on the side of Sherlock's chair.

Sherlock sat down in his chair, spreading his dressing gown out. "You bring me tea in the morning?" He glanced at his wife. "For the both of us?"

Mrs. Hudson smiled. "Well, where d'you think it came from?!" She asked.

"I don't have time in the mornings to make tea and biscuits." Marion said.

"I don't know. I just thought it sort of happened." Sherlock said flitting his hand.

"Your mother has a lot to answer for." Mrs. Hudson said. She took the cup and saucer over to him. She then returned with another for Marion who took it gratefully.

"Mm, I know." Sherlock said. "I have a list. Mycroft has a file. Marion may have a book…"

"Marion does have a book." Marion said smiling down at him. "Titled 'Things I would change about my husband if I could'… it is about the size of an encyclopedia."

Sherlock sipped his tea and looked up at her and shook his head. "Am I really that bad?"

"No, but it is fun to tease you." Marion said.

"Hummmm"

Giggling, Mrs. Hudson sat down in John's chair. "So…it's the big day, then!" She said excitedly.

Sherlock took a sip of tea. "What big day?"

"The wedding! John and Mary getting married!"

"Two people who currently live together are about to attend church, have a party, go on a short holiday and then carry on living together. What's big about that?" He asked.

"It changes people, marriage."

"Mmm, no it doesn't." Sherlock said.

"No it doesn't as much as fatherhood." Marion said.

He looked up at her.

"What we didn't do all that before we married." She said.

"No, but I impressed you."

"That you did." She smiled.

"You two are the minority. You two have the strangest most loving relationship I have ever seen." Mrs. Hudson said.

Sherlock was lifting his teacup to his mouth but stopped momentarily. "Your husband was executed for double murder. You're hardly an advert for companionship." He drank.

"Marriage changes you as a person, in ways that you can't imagine."

"As does lethal injection." He smiled pointedly at her.

"Sherlock has not changed. I never hoped to change him and nor would I want to." Marion said.

"Hummm thank you sweetheart."

"My best friend, Margaret…she was my chief bridesmaid." Mrs. Hudson startled. Putting his cup down on the table beside him, Sherlock rolled his eyes at his wife who pushed her lips together at him. "We were going to be best friends forever, we always said that; but I hardly saw her after that."

Sherlock stood up. "Aren't there usually biscuits?"

"I've run out."

"Have the shops?" He asked pointedly.

He pointedly walked toward the door.

"She cried the whole day, saying, 'Ooh, it's the end of an era.'" Mrs. Hudson continued.

Sherlock gestured to the stairs. "I'm sure the shop on the corner is open."

"She was probably right, really."

Sherlock closed his eyes and grimaced. Marion was smiling into her tea.

"I remember she left early. I mean, who leaves a wedding early?" She shook her head. "So sad."

"Mmm. Anyway, you've got things to do."

"No, not really. I've got plenty of time to ..."

Sherlock looked at her. "Biscuits." He said sternly.

She got out of her chair, tutting at him. She walked to the door. "I really am going to have a word with your mother."

"You can if you like. She understands very little." Sherlock shrugged. He closed the door on her, then turned around sighing.

"That was a bit rude, my love." Marion said rising to her feet.

He looked toward John's chair for a few moments. He sighed.

Marion walked to him. "Are you okay?" She asked him gently. She followed his gaze. "It isn't like he is leaving our friendship circle, love. He will still be around."

He nodded and took a deep breath before he walked through the kitchen and down the hallway to their bedroom. He pulled off his dressing gown and looked at the suit hanging up. "Right, then." He walked through his bedroom to his wardrobe, where a morning suit was hanging from the open door. He looked at it closely. "Into battle." He breathed.

Marion came up behind him and he took it down. "I love you." She whispered rubbing his shoulders gently.

He touched her hand with his. "I know." He said softly. He looked at her over his shoulder. "You are nearly ready, but how are the little ones?"

"Lizzy hasn't taken her dress off since dawn this morning. Kerrin is in his suit in the carrier." She nodded at the floor where Kerrin was sleeping with a large nappie bag beside him. "And I just have to take my hair out of these things, brush it out, and do my make-up."

He nodded. "Let's to it then, Doctor Holmes."

"Of course, Mr. Holmes." She turned and walked to the washroom. He watched her go before he moved to dress himself in his best man's tuxedo.

ZzZ

Church bells pealed and the doors to a church opened. John and Mary, newly married, walked out followed by Sherlock and Marion, Janine, then two more bridesmaids and the vicar. A photographer was waiting outside for them.

"Congratulations! Okay, hold it there...I wanna get this shot of the newlyweds." The photographer said.

John and Mary stopped and the bridesmaids stood behind them. Sherlock stepped to Mary's side. Marion and the other bridesmaids stood behind holding flowers and confetti.

"Er, just the bride and groom, please."

Sherlock didn't move. John looks round at him. "Sherlock?"

"Oh, sorry." He walked out of shot.

"Okay…three, two, one, cheese!"

The bridesmaids threw handfuls of confetti into the air and the photographer started taking pictures. The rest of the congregation came out and the photo-taking continued, including one of John, Sherlock and Greg standing side by side, with Lizzy laughing and playing in the confetti and Archie standing in front of them wearing either John's or Sherlock's top hat.

Later, the photographer took a picture of Sherlock and Janine standing together. Nearby, Molly stood with her fiancé Tom. She was gazing at Sherlock and if she really believed that she has 'moved on,' her expression suggested that she's not fooling anyone but herself. Marion was holding Kerrin who was in a tuxedo onesie looking at everything as she bounced him talking to Mary and Mrs. Hudson.

After the photographer has finished with them, Janine looked round at Sherlock beside her. "The famous Mr. Holmes! I'm very pleased to meet you. But no sex, okay?" She said.

Sherlock was startled. "Um, sorry?"

Janine laughed and touched his arm. "You don't have to look so scared. I'm only messing. Bridesmaid, best man ... It's a bit traditional." She gently punched his arm.

He looked down with distaste. "Is it?"

"But not obligatory!" She said a little awkwardly.

"You do know I am married. My wife is the lovely matron of honor with the bride there."

"Oh!" She said. "Why is she not here with you?"

"She is talking I suppose." He shrugged.

She blinked as he sighed. "Doesn't seem too into you." She said. "I hope the sex is good." She told him.

He blinked. "If that's the sort of thing you're looking for ..." He jerked his head toward one of the wedding guests. "... the man over there in blue is your best bet. Recently divorced doctor with a ginger cat ...a barn conversion ... and a history of erectile dysfunction." Sherlock blinked again. "Reviewing that information, possibly not your best bet."

"Yeah, maybe not."

Sherlock looked puzzled. "Sorry…there was one more deduction there than I was expecting."

"Mr. Holmes ..." She took his arm. "...you're going to be incredibly useful."

Again Sherlock looked down at her hand. He frowned

ZzZ

Later, John and Mary, with Sherlock at John's side, and Marion beside Mary stood by the door of the venue for the reception. Kerrin was in the care of Molly and Tom. Lizzy was being watched by Greg Lestrade. The four at the door were greeting guests as they passed.

Mary shook a man's hand. "Hello. Lovely to meet you."

She then kissed a woman. The woman moved on to kiss John, and another man moved in to kiss Mary.

"How are you?" Mary asked.

"You look beautiful, Mary." The man said.

"Thank you!" Mary said.

"Congratulations." The man said to John.

More guests moved past the four of them, then a man wearing a lurid purple tie came forward.

Mary looked at him with delight. "David!" She reached out her arms ready to hug him. He leaned away, laughing nervously, and just clasped her arms briefly.

"Mary. Congratulations. You look, um, very nice." He said. He quickly moved away from her.

Mary looked puzzled and looked at Marion who shrugged.

He shook John's hand. "John, congratulations. You're a lucky man."

"Thank you." John said.

"Um, er, David, this is Sherlock." She said nodding to the best man. "And his wife Marion beside me."

Sherlock smiled at him, tight-lipped.

David nodded. "Um, yeah. We've, um, we've met." He looked down nervously.

Sherlock looked at him and Marion caught his eye. He smiled reassuringly at her.

David made a couple of anxious noises, waved briefly to Mary and went indoors.

John looked round at Sherlock with a curious expression, but Sherlock raised his head and looked inscrutable.

The next guest approached.

"Hello!"

The greetings continued. A woman in a black and white dress approached and kissed Mary.

"Pleased to see you." Mary said.

The woman moved on to kiss and hug John. "Congratulations." She said.

"Thanks for coming, thank you."

The young pageboy was standing a few paces away. Mary smiled down at him, but the boy ran straight to Sherlock and wrapped his arms around him, smiling happily. Sherlock looked awkwardly down at him.

"Mm, yes, um, well done in the service, Archie." Sherlock said.

The woman in the black and white dress, obviously Archie's mother, smiled at them. "He's really come out of his shell. I don't know how you did it."

"Um ..." Sherlock said looking down at Archie still hugging him.

"He said you had some pictures for him, as a treat."

"Er, yes ..." He patted Archie's head. "... if he's good."

Archie turned to look at his mom. "Beheadings."

Sherlock looked down and then said quietly. "Lovely little village."He unwrapped Archie from around him and gently pushed him toward the entrance.

"Hmm?" The woman asked. She looked down at Archie as they went inside. "What did you say?"

ZzZ

Inside the building, Molly was canoodling with Tom, repeatedly kissing his cheek. Tom indicated that the photographer was approaching them, and she turned and smiled into the camera as he took some pictures. Kerrin was waking up from his nap in her arms. He was looking about, but not awake enough to fuss yet. She held him and smiled up at Tom. He smiled back and looked at the baby.

"Nice." The photographer said.

He moved on to the next nearest couple, who were Mrs. Hudson and what must surely be Mr. Chatterjee from the sandwich shop. She smiled happily for the camera; Mr Chatterjee didn't look quite so happy to be there.

The photographer turned and snaps several pictures of Greg sitting at a table and drinking. Greg raised his glass to him before turning back to Lizzy who was coloring next to him, chattering about something. He had to admit he liked having his tiny charge. At least she was well mannered.

John and Mary were standing nearby. John indicated as a waiter approached with a plate of canapés. "Oh, d'you want ...?" He asked.

Mary took one off the plate. "I'm starving."

John declined one as the plate was brought to him. "Thanks."

"Had to lose so much weight to get into this dress." She said.

John chuckled.

Marion retrieved her son a moment as he began to fuss hungrily. "Little piglet." She muttered having heard he had already had his bottles waiting for and during the service. There was one left for an emergency, but free now, she walked toward the powder room to nurse. She smiled as she walked passed her husband and he smiled back a little.

Sherlock and Janine were standing together a short distance away. Janine looked admiringly at the waiter as he walked past.

"He's nice."

Sherlock sniffed deeply. "Traces of two leading brands of deodorant, both advertised for their strength, suggestive of a chronic body odor problem manifesting under stress."

"Okay, done there. What about his friend?"

Sherlock turned to look where she was looking. In the nearby kitchen, another waiter was carefully pulling out the skewer from the middle of a large joint of roast beef. "Long-term relationship, compulsive cheat."

"Seriously?"

"Waterproof cover on his smartphone." He paused. "Yet his complexion doesn't indicate outdoor work." Sherlock smiled a little. "Suggests he's in the habit of taking his phone into the shower with him, which means he often receives texts and emails he'd rather went unseen."

"Can I keep you?" She asked putting he hands on her hips.

"D'you like solving crimes?"

"Do you have a vacancy?"

Sherlock's eyes drifted over to John, then he looked away again. He smiled at her coyly.

ZzZ

Mary put a hand on John's shoulder.

"So, Harry?" Mary asked.

"Er, no. No show."

"Darling, I'm so sorry."

"It was a bit of a punt asking her, I suppose. Still, free bar…wouldn't have been a good mix." He looked down, then raised his eyes toward the entrance and looked surprised. "Oh, God, wow!"

A scarred uniformed man just walked in.

"Oh, G... Is that ...?" Mary asked.

"He came!"

As Mary smiled with delight, John walked over to the man and they saluted each other.

Sherlock walked over to Mary."So that's him. Major Sholto." His voice sounded almost disapproving.

"Uh-huh."

Sherlock narrowed his eyes as he looked at the two men.

"If they're such good friends, why does he barely even mention him?" Sherlock asked. He noticed his wife coming back into the room with Kerrin on her hip. The baby was looking at things and contentedly gurgling.

Greg saw and reached up. "Gimme the little bugger."

Marion smiled and handed the boy off and the sat down a moment.

"He mentions him all the time to me. He never shuts up about him." Mary said.

"About him?"

"Mm-hmm." She took a drink from her wine glass, then grimaced. "Urgh. I chose this wine. It's bloody awful."

"Yes, but it's definitely him that he talks about?" Sherlock said.

"Mm-hmm."

Marion smiled at her husband and then caught sight of someone waving her over. She moved to go speak to them knowing her infant son was being well looked after.

At the entrance, John was speaking to Sholto. "I'm very, very glad to see you, sir. I know you don't really do this sort of thing."

"Well, I do for old friends, Watson ... John. It's good to see you."

"You too."

Sholto nodded, then looked around the room. "Civilian life suiting you, then?"

"Er, er, yes, well ..." He gestured towards Mary. "... I think so, sir."

"No more need for the trick cyclist?"

"No, I-I go now and then. Sort of a top-up."

Sholto nodded.

"Therapy can be very helpful." John said softly.

Sholto looked away.

"Where are you living these days?" John asked changing the subject.

"Oh, way out in the middle of nowhere. You wouldn't know it." He smiled and then noted Marion coming to John.

She held out her hand. "Hello. I am Marion Holmes." She said.

"You look beautiful my dear. And I noticed you are a new mother." Sholto said taking her hand gently. He lifted it and kissed it gently. She smiled.

"Yes. Thank you." She blushed and looked at John. "Thank you for coming. I am glad to meet you."

"You as well, my dear."

She walked back toward where Mrs. Hudson was talking to Molly. They smiled at her and shifted to include her.

"I've never even heard him say his name." Sherlock continued.

"Well, he's almost a recluse…you know, since ..." Mary said.

"Yes."

"I didn't think he'd show up at all. John says he's the most unsociable man he's ever met."

"He is? He's the most unsociable?" Sherlock said startled.

"Mm."

"Ah, that's why he's bouncing round him like a puppy." He said sighing.

Mary grinned and hugged his arm. "Oh, Sherlock! Neither of us were the first, you know."

He looked round at her. "Stop smiling."

"It's my wedding day!"

Rolling his eyes, Sherlock pulled free and walked away. She took another drink from her wine glass, then pulled a face.

Marion joined her. "It really isn't that bad you know." She said.

"Yes it is."

Marion chuckled. "It is a little dry." She smiled.

Mary hugged her. "Can you go make sure Sherlock is all right?"

"I am sure he is? Why?"

"He seems a little down."

"He is in a room surrounded by more people than he sees in a year. He is not social and you know it."

"Just make sure…please. I don't want him to run off before he makes his speech…"

"Oh he is not going anywhere, but I will talk to him." Marion said looking back toward where he husband was lifting his phone to make a call.

ZzZ

Mycroft's home was lavish. There were many rooms. This room was interior of a grand building and a room with a large old painting on the wall and a suit of armor standing nearby. A steady regular thumping sound could be heard.

Within the room was a running machine. Mycroft dressed in gym clothes was jogging on the machine. After a while he switched it off and jumped off, breathing heavily. He walked a few paces away, then stopped and lifted his top to examine his stomach, patting it reflectively and looking quite pleased with himself.

On a nearby table, his phone rang. He picked it up and answered. "Yes, what, Sherlock?" He asked breathlessly.

"Why are you out of breath?" Sherlock asked as he walked in the reception.

"Filing."

"Either I've caught you in a compromising position or you've been working out again. I favor the latter."

"What do you want?"

"I need your answer, Mycroft, as a matter of urgency."

"'Answer'?"

"Even at the eleventh hour it's not too late, you know."

"Oh, Lord." Mycroft sighed.

"Cars can be ordered, private jets commandeered."

"Today. It's today, isn't it? No, Sherlock, I will not be coming to the 'night do', as you so poetically put it."

"What a shame. Mary and John will be extremely d..." Sherlock started to sneer insincerely.

"... delighted not to have me hanging around."

"Oh, I don't know. There should always be a spectre at the feast." Sherlock turned and his wife was there looking at him and cocking his head.

Mycroft sat down and lifted his glass from the table. "So, this is it, then. The big day. I suppose I'll be seeing a lot more of you from now on."

"What do you mean?"

"Just like old times."

"No, I don't understand."

"Well, it's the end of an era, isn't it? John and Mary…domestic bliss."

"I have domestic bliss…" Sherlock said looking at his wife who smiled a little.

"You're isn't so much domestic bliss as cohabitation with benefits."

"Oh come off it. You do not know a thing about Marion and I."

"I know more than I care to. We do talk remember…" Mycroft paused. "But Mary and John…they will be moving on with their lives…"

"No, no, no…I prefer to think of it as the beginning of a new chapter."

Mycroft simply smiled.

"What?"

"Nothing!"

"I know that silence. What?"

"Well, I'd better let you get back to it. You have a big speech, or something, don't you?"

Sherlock looked at his wife and still demanded and answer to his previous question. "What?"

"Cake, karaoke ... mingling."

"Mycroft!" Sherlock barked angrily.

"This is what people do, Sherlock… they get married. I warned you: don't get involved."

"I am married and it hasn't changed me."

"It has a little."

"What do you mean involved? I'm not involved."

"No?" Mycroft asked disbelievingly

"John asked me to be his best man. How could I say no?"

"Absolutely!" Mycroft said insincerely.

Marion leaned closer.

"I'm not involved!" Sherlock protested.

Mycroft kept his insincere tone. "I believe you! Really, I do! Have a lovely day, and do give the happy couple my best."

"I will." He lowered the phone. He looked at his wife about to switch it off when Mycroft spoke again.

"Oh, by the way, Sherlock…do you remember Redbeard?"

Sherlock's jaw tightened and Marion touched his cheek softly as he brought the phone back to his ear. "I'm not a child any more, Mycroft."

"No, of course you're not. Enjoy not getting involved, Sherlock."

Sherlock hung up. He looked down for a moment, then walked across the room toward the top table.

Marion took his hand. "Sherlock…"

"Mycroft is just being an ass…" He said.

"Who is Redbeard?" She asked. "Why are you angry?"

"Later." He said shaking his head.

She nodded and let him walk past her. She followed him and sat down beside him. She touched his thigh under the table as he took a breath to calm himself. "I love you." She whispered.

"I know." He said turning to her and kissing her cheek softly. "I'm fine."

"You're lying."

He shrugged.

"That got to you."

"Yes." He admitted.

She nodded. "We will talk later."

He nodded as the others came to the top table.

ZzZ

The wedding meal had three courses and lots of champagne. The conversation was a dull roar as people spoke to each other. Marion was holding Kerrin as he slept, eating one handed for the last two courses, a skill Sherlock admired in her as she continued speaking to Janine to her left and Sherlock to her right.

The head waiter tapped a spoon against a champagne flute to get everyone's attention. The conversation died off and looked at him. "Pray silence for the Matron of Honor."

Marion smiled and stood up holding Kerrin in her arms. "Thank you all for coming. It has been a delight to watch the love affair that has been Mary and John. Though I have not known them long, you only need five minutes to understand that they are good people. Their relationship was quite different than my own and it was fun to help them plan. The excitement and joy of helping pick out the wonderful gowns, the cake, the venue, the flowers, and the menu." She smiled. "Mary, I am glad I know you and I hope our friendship blooms even more than it already has. John, look after her. She is a wonderful woman." She lifted her glass. "All happiness to John and Mary." She said.

The men rose to their feet. "John and Mary." They drank and recovered their seats.

Sherlock looked at her. "How did you do that without notes?" He hissed at her.

"Said what came to mind. That was why I was done before you."

"That isn't playing fair." He hissed.

She smiled and patted his arm.

"Pray silence for the best man." The head waiter said.

Marion smiled. "You're up."

The guests applauded and cheered as Sherlock rose to his feet at the top table. He buttoned his jacket looking very uncomfortable.

"Ladies and gentlemen, family and friends ... and ... erm ... others." He stopped and blinked. There's an awkward pause. "Er ... w..."

John narrowed his eyes and looked up at him.

"A-a-also ..."

Mary lifted a thumb to her mouth, rubbing it on her top lip. Mrs. Hudson looked nervous and Greg sat back a little, looking concerned. Lizzy was still drawing next to him, ignoring everything about her.

"I confess at first I didn't realize he was asking me. When finally I understood, I expressed to him that I was both flattered and ... surprised. I explained to him that I'd never expected this request and I was a little daunted in the face of it. I nonetheless promised that I would do my very best to accomplish a task which was…for me…as demanding and difficult as any I had ever contemplated. Additionally, I thanked him for the trust he'd placed in me ..."

John frowned as if unable to remember this conversation.

"... and indicated that I was, in some ways, very close to being ... moved by it. It later transpired that I had said none of this out loud."

John laughed and some of the guests joined in. Marion looked up at her husband and smiled.

Sherlock reached into his jacket pocket, clearing his throat, and took out a handful of cue cards, looking at each one he put them onto the table as he talked to himself. "Done that. ... Done that ... Done that bit ... Done that bit ... Done that bit ... Hmm ..." He looked up at the guests again, then turns to John. "I'm afraid, John, I can't congratulate you."

Mary looked surprised and John looked up at him. Marion blinked as she too looked up at her husband.

Sherlock looked at the guests. "All emotions, and in particular love, stand opposed to the pure, cold reason I hold above all things. A wedding is, in my considered opinion, nothing short of a celebration of all that is false and specious and irrational and sentimental in this ailing and morally compromised world."

The guests began to look uncomfortable. Some of them started murmuring quietly to each other. Greg and Molly looked at Sherlock in horror. Marion looked to John and lifted a hand. She was ready to stop him, but she knew he had a line of thought here. He was expressing himself in his typical Sherlock fashion and she needed to let him get to his point.

"Today we honor the death-watch beetle that is the doom of our society and, in time…one feels certain…our entire species."

The guests stared at him.

"Sherlock…"Marion hissed behind him.

Sherlock paused for a moment. "But anyway ..." He looked down at his cards. "... let's talk about John."

"Please." John said softly.

Marion nodded. "Topic Sherlock." Marion hissed behind him softly.

Sherlock looked up again. "If I burden myself with a little help-mate during my adventures, it is not out of sentiment or caprice…it is that he has many fine qualities of his own that he has overlooked in his obsession with me."

Greg laughed silently before covering it to look at one of Lizzy's drawings.

"Indeed, any reputation I have for mental acuity and sharpness comes, in truth, from the extraordinary contrast John so selflessly provides."

John sighed heavily, while Mary frowned. Marion shook her head a little and reached forward to tug on the back of his suit in warning.

"It is a fact, I believe, that brides tend to favor exceptionally plain bridesmaids for their big day. There is a certain analogy there, I feel."

Janine stared up at him then she looked at Marion who rolled her eyes, and the other two bridesmaids looked uncomfortable.

Sherlock moved on to his next card. "... and contrast is, after all, God's own plan to enhance the beauty of his creation ..." The vicar smiled. "... or it would be if God were not a ludicrous fantasy designed to provide a career opportunity for the family idiot."

Mary face-palmed and John was half-hiding behind his clasped hands. The vicar looked at Sherlock grimly, and more guests were muttering amongst themselves. Marion shook her head at his back and took a breath debating on stopping him. She looked at John who blinked at her.

Sherlock paused for a moment. "The point I'm trying to make is that I am the most unpleasant, rude, ignorant and all-round obnoxious asshole that anyone could possibly have the misfortune to meet." He looked at the vicar. "I am dismissive of the virtuous ..." He turned to Janine, smiling a little before he then looked at his own wife a second who smiled encouragingly at him. "... unaware of the beautiful ..." He turned towards Mary and John. "... and uncomprehending in the face of the happy. So if I didn't understand I was being asked to be best man, it is because I never expected to be anybody's best friend."

The guests had fallen silent again and were listening intently. Molly and Greg exchanged a long glance.

"Certainly not the best friend of the bravest and kindest and wisest human being I have ever had the good fortune of knowing."

Mary smiled proudly at her husband. Marion smiled at her and then her eyes lifted to Sherlock. Finally he had his groove. Several of the guests made appreciative 'aww' sounds.

Sherlock continued. "John, I am a ridiculous man ..." John smiled and nodded his agreement as did Sherlock's wife behind him. "... redeemed only by the warmth and constancy of your friendship. But, as I'm apparently your best friend, I cannot congratulate you on your choice of companion." He looked down for a moment then smiled a little. "Actually, now I can."

The guests murmured again, but now their tone is much more approving. John and Mary smiled. Marion smiled at Mary who looked at her.

"Mary, when I say you deserve this man, it is the highest compliment of which I am capable. John, you have endured war, and injury, and tragic loss ..." He leaned closer to John. "... so sorry again about that last one ..." He straightened up again. "... so know this: today you sit between the woman you have made your wife and the man you have saved… in short, the two people who love you most in all this world. And I know I speak for Mary as well when I say we will never let you down, and we have a lifetime ahead to prove that."

Mrs. Hudson whimpered and held a tissue to her nose. Molly wiped tears from her eyes with her serviette. Other guests…even some of the men…sniffle.

John turned to Mary and whispered to her. "If I try and hug him, stop me."

"Certainly not." His wife said. She patted his arm.

Sherlock moved on to his next card. "Ah, yes. Now on to some funny stories about John ..." He trailed off as he looked up and saw so many of the guests crying. "What's wrong? What happened? Why are you all doing that? John? Marion?" He looked at John and Mary and then Marion sat forward and patted his hip gently.

"Marion?" Sherlock repeated looking at his wife. She grinned at him and gave him a thumbs up below the sight of the guests, but he could see it as she looked up at him proudly. He just stared at her in confusion.

Molly smiled proudly at him.

"Oh, Sherlock!" Mrs. Hudson said.

Sherlock looked down at John. "Did I do it wrong?"

"No, you didn't. Come here." John said as he stood up and hugged Sherlock, startling the best man, but Sherlock allowed it sighing.

The guests broke into applause.

"I haven't finished yet." Sherlock protested.

"Yeah, I know, I know." John said.

Sherlock held up the next card as John released him and talked over the applause. "So, on to some funny stories ..."

"Can you…can you wait…til I sit down?"

Sherlock nodded as the applause continued. John sat down, clearing his throat, and the applause finally faded. Marion smiled at John and shifted Kerrin as the boy shifted in his sleep. Marion chuckled at the portly baby.

Janine leaned close. "Can I hold him?" she whispered.

Marion smiled and nodded, grateful to pass him off. Janine took the baby and held him close as Kerrin settled against her rather full bosom to sleep more. Marion sat forward and smiled at her husband who had seen the movement and looked over at them. Marion smiled and Janine smiled up at him pressing her lips to the tiny hand of his infant son.

He half smiled and turned back to the audience before him. "So, on to some funny stories about John."

John chuckled.

Sherlock looked at the guests. "If you could all just cheer up a bit that would ..." The guests laughed. "... be better. On we go. So, for funny stories ..." He reached into his pocket and took out his phone. "... one has to look no further than John's blog." He held up the phone.

John laughed.

"The record of our time together. Of course, he does tend to romanticize things a bit, but then, you know ..." He looked down at John and Mary and half-winked at them. "... he's a romantic. We've tackled some strange cases: the Hollow Client ..." He paused flicking on the phone. "... the Poison Giant ..."He sighed. "We've had some frustrating cases ..." He rolled his eyes. "... 'touching' cases ..." He then smiled. "... and of course I have to mention the elephant in the room." He looked up at the guests. "But we want something ... very particular for this special day, don't we?" He looked down at his phone then raised his eyes again. "The Bloody Guardsman."

The guests looked at each other. Marion and John looked at each other and smiled. That had been a good case.

"Private Bainbridge had just come off guard duty. He'd stood there for hours, plenty of people watching, nothing apparently wrong. He came off duty and within minutes was nearly dead from a wound in his stomach, but there was no weapon. Where did it go? Ladies and gentlemen, I invite you to consider this: a murderer who can walk through walls, a weapon that can vanish â " but in all of this there is only one element which can be said to be truly remarkable. Would anyone like to make a guess?" The guests fidgeted and looked at each other. Sherlock sighed. "Come on, come on, there is actually an element of Q and A to all of this." He cleared his throat.

Still the guests remained silent.

"Scotland Yard." Sherlock said looking out at Greg.

Greg lifted his head.

"Have you got a theory?"

Greg stared at him blankly.

"Yeah, you. You're a detective…broadly speaking. Got a theory?"

"Er, um, if the, uh, if the, if-if-if, if the blade was, er, propelled through the, um ..." He stopped to think for a moment. "... grating in the air vent ... maybe a-a ballista or a…or a…or a catapult. Erm, somebody tiny could-could crawl in there." He sucked in a breath. "So, yeah, we're loo... we're looking for a-a-a-a dwarf."

Sherlock was staring at him blankly. "Brilliant."

"Really?"

"No." Sherlock said almost instantly.

Greg sighed and lowered his head to look at Lizzy.

"Next!" Sherlock asked.

"He stabbed himself." Tom whispered to Molly.

"Hello? Who was that?"

Tom looked round, wide-eyed.

"Tom."

Grimacing, Tom slowly stood up.

"Got a theory?"

Tom swayed nervously from foot to foot for a moment. He spoke softly and unsure. "Um ... attempted suicide, with a blade made of compacted blood and bone; broke after piercing his abdomen ... like a meat ... dagger."

A couple of the guests snickered. Sitting beside Tom, Molly's face was a picture of disbelief. She may have been reconsidering her marriage options.

At the top table, Sherlock's expression also spoke volumes. "A meat dagger." Sherlock said precisely.

"Yes." Tom said awkwardly.

"Sit. Down." Molly hissed and reached up to yank him down to the chair.

"No." Sherlock said shaking his head.

Tom sat down.

Sherlock shook his head before he spoke again. "There was one feature, and only one feature, of interest in the whole of this baffling case, and quite frankly it was the usual. John Watson…who, while I was trying to solve the murder, instead saved a life."

Mary quietly laughed in delight and John smiled.

"There are mysteries worth solving and stories worth telling." He looked down at John. "The best and bravest man I know…and on top of that he actually knows how to do stuff." John lowered his head and chuckled with embarrassment. "... except wedding planning and serviettes…he's rubbish at those."

"True!" John said.

The guests laughed.

Sherlock smiled and continued. "The case itself remains the most ingenious and brilliantly-planned murder…or attempted murder… I've ever had the pleasure to encounter; the most perfect locked-room mystery of which I am aware. However, I'm not just here to praise John… I'm also here to embarrass him, so let's move on to some ..."

Greg looked up and interrupted him. "No-no, wait, so how was it ... how was it done?"

"How was what done?"

"The stabbing."

Sherlock looked down awkwardly for a few moments then raised his head.

"I'm afraid I don't know. I didn't solve that one. That's ..." He paused. "... It can happen sometimes. It's very ... very disappointing." He made a face. He looked reflective for a second then took a breath and looked out to the guests again.

Marion patted his arm and her turned to her a moment. She smiled encouragingly at him.

He nodded and sighed taking a sip of his drink to wet his throat again before continuing.