The Secret Life of the American Teenager is owned by Brenda Hampton and the Producers of ABCFAMILY CHANNEL. The characters portrayed are their property, but story and plot are of my own design.
Letters From the Sky
Butcher Shop Apartment
June 19, 2012
Amy & Ricky arrived home from the Spain after two weeks, in the following week Amy would be going to New York. But first there was something she needed to do. Unknown to Ricky the mail had been delivered and in it she found a letter addressed to her with no sender or return address. She knew who the letter was from and waited until Ricky had left for work before she opened it.
To Amy:
If you're reading this then that means, that I have already left, and you are now Ricky's real wife, not lying about being his wife. I know that I shouldn't feel disappointed that you chose to marry him, but I do. But, I have gotten used to disappointment these days, I am really disappointed in myself right now.
I'm writing this to you so I can explain why, and hope you understand. I would be lying to you if I said that you aren't part of the reason I'm leaving, and I have never lied to you. But, I wish you would have had the same feelings about me. I can never understand Amy, Why? Why were you with me, if you always had feelings for Ricky.
I used to think that it was because of John, but that wasn't always' it. I know that because if it were you would have never acted the way you did. I would ask you so many times Amy did you love me, and not Ricky, and each time you say you loved me. But, no matter how hard I tried, I could never trust you. I guess it's because I actually did love you, and I knew when you were keeping something from me. It's how I knew that you were pregnant.
I want you to know that I was honest when I said that I didn't hate you. You were the first person that I ever loved, I'm just sorry that I wasn't the one you loved. I hope that you and Ricky are in love, and happy. Coming from me, I know that may not mean much, but I am serious. I want, and need you two to be in love, and happy. I need that because if you are then that might give purpose to everything we all went through.
I hope that you two can learn from the mistakes of your past, and use that knowledge to better yourselves. I also hope you can raise your son, no matter what your future has to go through. Even though he is not mine, I will always think of John as if he is mine. I also hope that you learn how to be a good person Amy, because I do see good in you.
I really hope you learn to appreciate your life, and the people you have in your life. Particularly your sister. She really cares about you Amy, and she loves you. You may not know that, but she does. If she didn't you would have never met Ricky. She doesn't want me to tell you this, but she gave up her dancing for you.
The year you went to band camp, and met Ricky was the very same year she was suppose to go to dance camp, but she overheard your parents say they couldn't afford to send both of you to camp. They had decided to send Ashley since her teacher saw how promising she was. But, Ashley being Ashley gave up her dance so you could become a better French horn player. She really does love you, but she also hates you for not realizing how lucky you are. I want you to try and reach out to her Amy. Being an older sibling myself now, I know that she looks up to you, and she needs you. You were her hero once upon a time Amy, you should really be that hero again.
Goodbye, Your ex-husband, ex-fiancee, ex-boyfriend, but always your friend Benjamin F. Boykewich
P.S. You always wondered if I ever slept with Maria while I was in Bolonia. I didn't, I did however get up her shirt, and she tried, but I stopped her. I did love you Amy, and I wouldn't try to hurt you like that. I know you think what happened between Adrian and I was me trying to hurt you, but it wasn't really like that. I cared about Adrian, and when you told me you kissed Ricky, it kind of freed me. Freed me to give into the desire I had to be with Adrian. I didn't just sleep with her to hurt you, I wanted to give my virginity to someone I cared about, and trusted. No matter how much I cared about you, I don't think I could ever trust you. I never had that problem with Adrian. I want to say I'm sorry for that especially after everything that happened, but I can't, nor can I explain why I can't.
Amy put the letter down, and began to cry feeling sad that she had introduced so much chaos into Ben's life. She felt guilty for how even now he was trying to help her, and he still didn't blame her. She also felt ashamed that out of everything that Ben had done for her, John, and Ricky they had done nothing but hurt him.
Boykewich Mansion June 23, 2012
(Ben's Birthday)
Leo and Camille waited until June 23, Ben's 19'th birthday to open the letter he left for them. This was the day Leo thought was his happiest now his saddest. He hated himself for all that his son had been through. What he hated most, was he felt it was his fault, since he was always pressuring his son to be there for other people, and never noticed no one seemed there for him. He felt that instead of always forcing Ben to think about others he should have let him have time to adapt, and adjust.
To Mom, and Dad:
If you are reading this then you know, that I left, and you also know that I may not be coming back. I don't know why, but I just don't feel like I belong here anymore. I have had this feeling for a really long time now. I know that you thought it would be best if I just go to college, and get a new start but there's more to it than that.
I don't feel like me anymore. I don't feel like I'm Ben Boykewich. I just can't explain it. It just feels like I'm not me. That sounds strange considering its' me saying that, but I'm pretty sure that you've noticed it too. Its' not me reacting to my tumor. I thought it was that at first too, so when it was gone I thought my feelings would change, but they haven't.
Dad, I know that you think that you are at fault, and I'm not going to lie you kind of are. I know you did your best to try, and help me but sometimes dad you get too involved. I know the situations I put myself in were unorthodox, but sometimes you should have just talked to me, or let me deal with it. There is a such thing as getting too involved in your kid's life.
I understand why you did most of it, and I'm sorry that I disappointed you with my ignorant behavior. You asked me why I felt I needed to save so many girls, and I guess it's because I'm your son, and I couldn't let someone who needed help just be without it. I'm sorry that I couldn't live up to the man that you are, and that I can't be the man you want me to be. I really hope Ricky can be that man.
Camille, I hope you don't think I am leaving because of you. The truth is when you hit me it kind of knocked some sense into me. It made me realize how foolish I was acting, and that is not what my mom wanted me to do. You have been in my life since I was born, and I'm sorry for everything I said. I guess I was just angry that it felt like you, dad, and everyone else had moved on and found each other and I was alone.
Honestly it feels like I am alone now. I see you, Dad, and Chloe together and I see how happy all of you are, and it feels like I'm a stranger intruding. I just don't fit in anymore. It feels like this town has changed, and everyone else with it, and I am still the same. Or maybe I have changed, and everything else is the same.
I wish I didn't feel like this, but I do. I will keep all of you in my heart, and I love you. I'm sorry if I disappointed you. Please be happy you two. Please, Please, Please, take care of Chloe, she needs both of you now that I am gone. I hope that you two can help her realize her full potential, because she has so much of it. I want you guys to make sure she understands that this was my decision, and she had nothing to do with it. Honestly having all of you is the only reason I didn't leave sooner. Take care of each other and love one another.
Be Safe, Be happy, & Be a family
Your Son
Benjamin Franklin Boykewich
May 30, 2013
Condo of Adrian Lee
To Adrian:
If you are reading this then you probably know that I am gone. I want you to know that you did influence my decision to leave only because I know now that you are okay. I don't want you to blame yourself Adrian, unlike others I never really blamed you for anything that happened. I know that is way different from how I re-acted in the nursery.
The truth is that night I slept with you was more my fault than yours. You came there to get even with Ricky, and Amy because you thought they slept together, but I knew it was just a kiss. I should have never been that angry over a kiss, but mostly it was the lies. Ricky, and Amy told us both they had no interest in the other, but they lied.
I think that is what I hated most, the lies. They always told about not being interested in one another, and always leading us on. I felt like such a fool being used by both of them, and I could tell you had it even worse, because you really wanted to believe Ricky loved you, and I knew that neither Amy or Ricky loved or cared for either of us.
I know this sounds hard to hear coming from me so much later after everything that happened, but I knew the truth the whole time. You are smart, beautiful, strong, and fun Adrian and any man would be proud to be with you, and spend the rest of his life with you. I know this because that is how I felt when we were together. I am sorry I never told you that.
Truthfully that night I slept with you because I wanted you for myself. When we became friends it was strange, because I could talk to you about anything, and you would be so honest and open with me. Unlike Amy I could trust that you were being honest with me, and I could tell you anything without being judged. I respected you as one of my closest friends, even closer than Henry, and Alice.
Which is why I felt so ashamed of sleeping with you that night. When you came to see me, I could tell what Ricky did hurt you, because you thought things were going to be different. I could also see that you wanted to be comforted. I guess I needed comforting too that night, but that isn't what we did.
What we did was wrong only because of the reason why, or Mercy would never have been concieved, or at least that is what I like to believe. I know us getting married was wrong, but being with you was probably the only thing I know I did that was right. When I was with Amy it was so hard, being with her, comforting her, trying to deal with her, the pregnancy, her feelings for Ricky, and her lies to me. Being with you was never like that.
I know we fell in love for the wrong reason, but I want you to know I did fall in love with you, and I don't ever want you to doubt that. I never felt that you used me, or tried to use me, or even wanted to hurt me. I knew that even after I found out about you and Henry. I don't know why the two of you did what you did, but I really do forgive you. I even forgive him.
I want you to know that I wish you and Omar the best of luck, and I hope you and he have many beautiful children together. I don't want you to feel guilty about what happened between us, I guess it was never meant to be, but those few days we spent together as husband, and wife meant the world to me.
I hope Omar knows just how lucky he is. I guess he does know because unlike Ricky and me he is still with you. I hope he treats you the way Ricky and I never did. Because you deserve the love, and understanding that we could never give you. Take care Adrian Lee, and continue to be the strong, proud, and spontaneous girl I will always love, and hold special.
Your ex-husband, but always loyal friend
Benjamin Franklin Boykewich.
Adrian: Omar, what do you want to do for dinner tonight!
Omar: (snaps back from reading the letter, and balls it and the envelope up as Adrian walked in) What?
Adrian: Dinner, what do you want?
Omar: Why don't you let me treat you to dinner tonight (hides balled up letter, gets up to kiss Adrian)
Adrian: Really, what brought this on?
Omar: I want to celebrate my fiance, coming to her senses and moving to New York with me. (kissing Adrian, and throwing the letter in the trash while doing so.)
Adrian: Okay, let me go get ready. (leaves to get dressed)
Omar: (Goes to trash can, and hides letter) Sorry, I had to do that Ben but couldn't take the chance.
Omar as it turns out doesn't really trust Adrian, or at least does not trust she wants to be with him. He thought Ricky was the problem, but realizes Ben was an even bigger part of her life. He took her phone the day Ben was in the hospital in an effort to make sure he could keep tabs, and hacked it, so he could put a tracer on it, and look through her texts. Being the son of a cop he learned how to do it. He felt guilty after reading the letter now. He didn't realize Ben was not a threat.
Please have the song Letters From the Sky by Civil Twilight
One of these days the sky's gonna break
And everything will escape and I'll know
One of these days the mountains
Are gonna fall into the sea and they'll know
That you and I were made for this
I was made to taste your kiss
We were made to never fall away
Never fall away
You're coming back for me
You're coming back for me
You're coming back for me
You're coming back for me
One of these days letters are gonna fall
From the sky telling us all to go free
But until that day I'll find a way
To let everybody know that you're coming back
You're coming back for me
'Cause even though you left me here
I have nothing left to fear
These are only walls that hold me here
Hold me here, hold me here, hold me here
Only walls that hold me here
One day soon I'll hold you like the sun holds the moon
And we will hear those planes overhead
And we won't have to be scared
'Cause we won't have to be scared
We won't have to be, yeah, scared, no
You're coming back for me
You're coming back for me
You're coming back to me
You're coming back for me
You're coming
You're coming back for me
You're coming back for me
You're coming back for me
You're coming back for me
You're coming back to me
You're coming back to me
You're coming back for me
You're coming back