Thank you for all of the favorites and the feedback I know it is going to be a long and winding road for the girls but as in life there will be smiles and tears but they will make it through it. You are all amazing and I appreciate the support you have given me.

Maura kept a constant vigilance on Jane since they had just removed the tube from Jane's throat after four days of using it to try and help the lung heal itself. Jane's throat was scratchy and her voice was hoarse and raspy. Maura made sure she had a cup of ice chips for Jane to suck on and the nurse and Maura both made sure Jane was doing her breathing exercises. Every time Jane woke up Maura was by her side and Jane could tell that she was not eating much and sleeping even less. When Jane had a nightmare Maura was there immediately soothing her and Jane knew Maura needed to go home and get some sleep if she was not able to sleep in the hospital with her. Jane hesitated about wanting her to go home still having to deal with the issues of feeling not capable of defending Maura when she needed it the most.

Maura was currently sitting in a chair on the side of the bed and had her feet propped up on Janes bed. Jane took in her pale complexion and the shadows under her eyes, wishing she could wave a magic wand and make the memories of what had happened to her away. Every time Jane brought it up Maura changed the subject and Jane was wondering if a therapist would help her if she didn't want to talk to Jane. Jane's thought was that maybe Maura blamed Jane for not being able to defend her, not that Jane would blame her as she blamed herself. They brought in some soup and Jello for Jane to eat and she groaned. She was sick of soup and broth and Jello she would kill for a serving of Ma's lasagna. Maura sat down her book and picked up the spoon and started to feed her. If it were anyone but Maura Jane would protest but secretly she liked the attention she was getting from Maura.

"I love you." Jane mumbled after swallowing a bite of soup and grimacing as it burned her throat.

"I love you too, my heart." Maura dabbed some juice that trickled down her chin with a napkin. They had yet to even kiss since the shooting and Jane worried that maybe Maura was not attracted to her, she had a huge wound on her left side where they had drainage tubes to prevent a fluid buildup and between that and not protecting her she was afraid that it was affecting their relationship. After the soup was gone Maura opened the jello but Jane shook her head and started to look out the window.

"Are you ok?" Maura asked resting her hand on Jane's forehead searching for fever.

"I'm sorry." Jane mumbled unable to meet Maura's eyes.

"It's ok hon, if your not hungry you can eat it later." Maura said soothingly.

"No, Maur...I should have kept a better watch over you." Maura sat down on the edge of the bed pushing the tray out of her way. She rested a cool hand on Jane's cheek trying to get Jane to meet her eyes. Jane didn't want to because when she took in the bloodshot eyes and bluish shadows under her eyes the guilt just multiplied.

"Honey, it wasn't your fault. I am not upset with you in any way about my abduction. I blame him. I do blame you for stepping in the path of a bullet risking your life again, I don't think you believe me when I say I can't live without you."

Jane swallowed the tears in her throat and winced at the pain it caused but continued. "This world is a better place because you are in it, and I could never live with myself if I did not do everything possible to keep you here. You make a difference to so many people and you bring hope to the families of the dead. I can't imagine you not being here baby so I will always do my best to make sure you are safe."

"So my life is worth more than yours?" Maura tried to keep the anger out of her voice at Jane's trail of thought.

"If it weren't for you I would still be dr death. I would be hiding from life behind the bodies on my table. You have given me the strength to step out into the world and to be the woman I am now. I don't want to imagine a life without you in it. We just took vows to spend our life together and I will be damned if I am ready to let you go just yet." Maura wiped the tears away that had escaped down her cheek and Jane wrapped her hand in Maura's hair and pulled her head down so that it rest on Jane's chest allowing her to sob. After ten minutes the sobs had quieted and Jane could feel Maura giving into her exhaustion. She tried to pull her into the bed and Maura started to protest but Jane gave her a pleading look causing Maura to sigh and climb up on the bed.

Jane pulled the blanket over Maura and ran her hand up and down Maura's back humming softly and rocking just slightly trying to soothe Maura. The Medical Examiner latched hands with Jane and felt sleep starting to claim her. She had tried not to sleep because she had no control over the images that plagued her in her sleep. Jane had watched Maura sleep for almost an hour before she too started to drift off to sleep but woke to Maura struggling in her arms thrashing and mumbling in her sleep. Jane softly started to stroke her back and whisper in her ear that she was ok that Jane was there and she was protecting her and nothing was going to happen to her.

The detective felt like a liar as when push had come to shove she had not protected her. That was something she would have to deal with but she would be damned if she failed her again. She wondered what happened to Maura while she was being held but she refused to say anything about it and Jane figured it was best to let Maura handle it her way. Maura sat up screaming and tears falling down her cheeks and Jane's heart broke all over again.

"Shhhhh baby, I got you. You are ok, it's just you and me. Maura lunged out of the bed and rushed to the bathroom and Jane could hear Maura as she vomited over and over again. Jane knew it was mostly dry heaves as Maura had barely eaten. She text her mom asking what she should do as she had never felt so helpless before. Her mothers response was to be there for her. She asked her to bring Maura some food next time she came and was determined to get out of the hospital as soon as possible so that they could try to start putting their lives back together. Grabbing her iv pole Jane swung her legs over the bed holding onto her side and wincing in pain. Jane felt tears in her eyes but she knew this was pain from her heart that caused the tears.

Jane opened the bathroom door and gingerly knelt down beside Maura pulling her hair back and using a wet washrag to cool her face and neck. Maura rested her forehead on the toilet unable to get the images of her dream out of her head. She cursed herself for putting Jane through this, she felt inefficient in handling the thoughts in her head.

"You should be in bed." Maura mumbled as she tried to stand up. Jane stood and offered her hand to Maura and pulled her into her arms.

"I wish I could take away all your pain." Jane whispered.

"I feel the same." Maura said stroking Jane's face with a trembling hand.

"These are physical wounds they heal much quicker than these." Jane said tapping on Maura's forehead. "I will be ok sweetheart." Maura said leaning over the sink and brushing her teeth and washing her face.

"Do you think you should talk to someone?" Jane questioned once Maura finished in the sink.

"I will, once we get you home." Somehow Jane thought she agreed to that way to easily.

"Let's walk." Jane said since she was already up she felt the need to stretch her legs. They started down the hall but didn't hear the voice call their names. Suddenly there was a commotion and Korsak had laid his hand on Maura's shoulder and found himself thrown over her shoulder and her scream echoing down the hall.

Jane looked at her and wondered what the hell had happened to Maura.