Decisions

Spoilers: Compulsion, (a coffee shop recycles its coffee containers, 'and not in a good way,' as Mia says).

Loving Bear Donuts appeared in 'Dilemma' but the coffee was better there than here.

It was towards dawn that Greg finally drove back to the lab.

He drove in stubborn silence, his eyes focused on the road.

He didn't once look in Gil's direction, yet couldn't help being aware of him all the same. Out of a corner of his eye, Greg followed Grissom's every move.

Grissom, on the other hand, seemed blissfully unaware of his surroundings. His attention was entirely focused on the notes he'd made at the crime scene; he read, made a few notations, and then read some more.

Silence didn't bother Grissom; it was his element, so to speak.

Grissom could spend hours and hours without saying a word, but for Greg it was torture. The young man found himself wishing Nick or Sara were there instead of Grissom. With them in the car, he would have at least turned on the radio.

Not that Grissom would object to him turning on the radio; Greg just didn't want to do anything that might seem like an opening for conversation. What Greg wanted now was to get to the lab, log in his evidence, check on his schedule for the day after, and then-

"Let's grab a cup of coffee," Grissom said suddenly.

Greg almost jumped in surprise.

"What?" he asked, "Where?" There were nothing but warehouses as far as he could see.

But Grissom seemed to know the area well.

"Right there," he said, pointing at the next block. A huge bear made of plaster stood on the sidewalk, pointing towards a cheerful coffee shop.

"Loving Bear Donuts?" Greg asked incredulously. "You've got to be kidding me!"

"You see any other coffee place around?"

Greg dutifully turned into the parking lot but he wasn't happy.

"This is like the bottom of the barrel," he muttered. He glanced at Grissom, who was unbuckling his seat belt. "Haven't you learned anything from me after all this time?"

"Yes," Grissom replied as he opened the door, "I've learned to depend too much on coffee."

He returned with two containers and offered one to Greg.

Greg took the lid off his cup and carefully inspected the rim.

"What are you doing?" Grissom frowned.

"I'm looking for any signs that the cup was previously used."

"Mia's rubbing off on you," Grissom muttered in disapproval. He gulped some coffee and grimaced.

Greg chuckled.

"Tasty, huh?" he taunted.

"Very," Grissom replied ironically.

Greg sniffed at his own cup.

"It stinks," was the verdict.

"Diesel-strength coffee." Grissom agreed, taking a sip.

"Maybe they should start opening Loving Bear gas stations, then," Greg said, but the sarcasm was softened by a faint smile, and Grissom found himself smiling back.

"You don't have to drink it," Gil said magnanimously, "I needed the caffeine jolt. I drove to the lab straight from the airport, so -"

"You did?" Greg was surprised, "Then you must be beat -"

"I'm ok," Grissom said, taking another sip of coffee.

"You should go home, Grissom. I can log in your evidence if you want -"

Gil shook his head.

"I've got to go back to the lab, anyway. There's some stuff I brought from Portland in my fridge."

"Don't tell me you brought some DNA samples from Portland."

Grissom smiled but didn't comment.

Greg turned his attention back to his cup of coffee. That brief conversation had reminded him of the easy banter that characterized their moments together. He'd missed it.

Greg was starting to feel safe in the bubble of their easy friendship, when Grissom burst it.

"So," he said, "Everything ok, Greg?"

"Sure," Greg said casually.

Grissom kept a thoughtful gaze on Greg.

"For a moment I thought maybe you were pissed off at me."

Greg winced. So, Grissom had noticed. That was not good.

Greg shook his head.

"Everything's cool," he said.

"You sure?" Grissom pressed on.

Greg resorted to the same patronizing tone he'd used earlier in the night.

"You're my boss, Grissom," he said, "I'm not supposed to be angry at my boss."

"Tell that to the others," Grissom said dryly, "Everybody's been angry at me at some point; Sara, Warrick, Nick, Catherine -"

"And what do you do -take them to Loving Bear Donuts?"

"No," Gil replied evenly, "Usually, I simply call them into my office." He paused and then he added, with a tired grin. "Sometimes, they simply drop in when I least expect them to." He lifted his Styrofoam cup, "This is a first for me."

Grissom kept looking at him, and Greg squirmed under the scrutiny. To hide his confusion, he lifted the cup of coffee to his lips. Before he took a sip, however, he was struck by a sudden idea.

"You know what?" he said, starting to pat his pockets, "I bet a donut would make this coffee more palatable."

"Nothing could make it more palatable," Grissom muttered.

"Well, I'm gonna try anyway," Greg said, pulling a wrinkled five-dollar bill, "I'll be right back -"

"Wait." Grissom said just as Greg was about to open the door. "Don't bother. I've got some bacon-maple donuts in my office."

"Bacon-maple donuts?" Greg frowned.

"Fresh from the oven," Grissom added enticingly. Then he amended, "At least they were fresh from the oven this morning."

"They make donuts with bacon?"

"They're a Portland delicacy. You never heard of them?"

"Actually, no."

"You're gonna like them," Grissom said confidently.

Greg eyed him quizzically.

"You brought me donuts?"

"I brought a dozen. I'm gonna give you half," he added in what he obviously felt was a very generous offer.

"Half?" Greg repeated.

"Hey, six are plenty," Grissom replied in an mock-injured tone.

But Greg wasn't objecting to the number of donuts; he was just surprised at Grissom's gesture.

"I got you a shirt too," Grissom said casually. "I left it in my car, along with a couple of gifts that Janice sent you."

Greg opened his mouth and then closed it.

"You got me a shirt?" he asked at last.

"Yeah. A white shirt to replace the one you've been wearing in court. The cuffs are a bit frayed."

"I didn't notice," Greg said mechanically.

"Well, I did."

Greg didn't know what to say. He didn't feel he deserved getting gifts from Grissom; not after the hostile thoughts he'd been harboring against Gil, and certainly not after acting like a spoiled brat all night long.

Greg glanced into his coffee cup again. Maybe drinking this shitty coffee would be like doing penance? With this thought in mind, he lifted the cup and took a big gulp. It burned his throat just as if he'd swallowed a shot of whisky, and his painful grimace didn't go unnoticed.

Grissom gently removed the cup from Greg's fingers.

"You've had enough," Grissom said, as if the cup really held whisky and not third-rate coffee.

With nothing in his hands to hold on to, Greg put them on the steering wheel. He glanced at Grissom, half-expecting him to still be looking at him, waiting for an answer to his earlier question, but Gil's attention was elsewhere. The older man was patting his shirt pockets, searching for something. When he found it, he put it on the dashboard. It was a piece of paper folded in an odd shape.

"Take a look at this," Gil said, lightly tapping a corner of the paper.

It sprang, making a perfect arc in the air and landing on Greg's side.

Greg blinked at the sight of the little object falling on the steering wheel. He picked it up. The paper was folded in a distinctive way that he immediately recognized.

"Oh, my God," he said, a tinge of amusement in his voice, "It's the leaping frog." Greg examined the little origami figure. "Where did you get it?"

"I made it," Gil said. "Origami 101," he added when he saw the look of disbelief on Greg's face, "Janice forced me to take a class with her."

"Janice?" Greg asked skeptically, "She's interested in origami?"

"Not really. She just wanted to meet the instructor."

"The instructor?"

Grissom smiled at Greg's incredulity.

"Janice has mellowed out lately," he explained, "Would you believe she sat for three hours, mangling sheet after sheet of paper, just to meet this guy?"

"No," Greg said in all honesty.

"I couldn't believe it either. It seems Las Vegas had a bad effect on her."

"What about the guy? Did he notice her?"

"It was hard not to." Grissom said ironically, "She was all thumbs. But it worked," he added, surprised at this last fact. "The guy paid a lot attention to her and ended up asking her out."

"Well. Good for him," Greg said. Noticing Gil's frown, he added, "Hey, she's a doctor. She's a pretty good catch."

Grissom's eyebrows lifted at this assessment of Janice.

Greg smiled.

"So," he said, "What else did you learn to do?"

"I did the butterfly; didn't have much luck with the grasshopper -"

"Insects, of course," Greg muttered good-naturedly.

" -but I did learn to fold a dog that actually barks."

"You did?" Greg asked with interest, "I can never make mine bark."

"It's not that difficult," Grissom said, none too humbly, "You must be missing a step."

Greg smiled faintly at this. Grissom was showing off –something he did whenever he learned something new. Some people found this trait irritating, but Greg thought it was cute. Gil's insatiable quest for learning made him try his hand at anything -and be the best at it. Even origami.

Greg looked down. He still had the leaping frog in his hands. He put it back on the dashboard and tapped its behind, making it jump again.

Grissom's hand suddenly shot out and captured it in mid-air.

He looked questioningly at Greg.

"Are you still pissed off at me?" he asked.

Greg hesitated. He held Gil's gaze for a moment and then he peered outside, as if the answer to the question was somewhere out there.

A couple of days ago -a couple of hours ago- he would have answered that question with a definite yes. He was pissed off at Gil for leaving, for stirring feelings in him -feelings he didn't want to acknowledge but couldn't deny either: anger, disappointment, a sense of betrayal. Definitely not the kind of things he wanted to discuss with Gil.

...Except that it was Gil himself who was offering him a chance to speak up.

Greg looked at the passing cars for a while, until he realized he wasn't looking outside anymore but at his own reflection on the window.

He took a deep breath.

He really didn't know where to begin. He was going to give it a try, though. He cleared his throat -

And just as he was about to start, he felt Grissom's fingers tentatively touch the back of his neck.

Greg tilted his head away in a half-hearted attempt to avoid touch, but Grissom didn't seem to notice. His hand slowly took hold of Greg's neck and then it simply lay there -warm and reassuring. Heavy.

Greg didn't look at Grissom. Instead, he held his breath. He knew what was coming. It was something he called The Grissom Physical Exam. When Gil touched him like this, his fingers usually sneaked down and carefully followed the contours of Greg's cervical vertebrae, as if they were making sure that everything was as it should be.

Greg exhaled as he felt the slightest of movements from Gil's fingertips; a gentle caress that grew more assuredly as the fingers traced the shape of each vertebrae: C6... C7...

Reluctantly, Greg closed his eyes. He hated to admit this, but he kinda enjoyed those 'exams'. He liked Gil's touch. Missed it, in fact.

Part of him wanted to resist. It wasn't fair; Grissom had given him a chance to speak only to take it away before Greg could even make up his mind. But he didn't have time to dwell on this because he knew what was coming next: Pleasure, radiating from the single spot under Gil's fingers to the rest of his body.

Under Grissom's touch, any part of the body turned into an erogenous zone.

Greg groaned.

He was suddenly aware of Grissom's breath, hot against his cheek. Then he was aware of Grissom's mouth, almost touching his but without moving any further.

It seemed that, once again, Grissom was leaving it up to Greg to decide.

Greg glanced at Grissom. Gil's eyes were closed -no surprise, there. He never looked -

It didn't matter. Greg wanted that kiss -they hadn't kissed in quite a while. The job had kept them apart even before Grissom left Las Vegas.

Grissom's mouth tasted of that awful coffee but this only seemed to encourage Greg more. He wanted to remove all traces of that coffee from Gil's mouth, and Grissom was just as eager to return the favor.

Too soon they had to pull away to take a breath, but they stayed close nonetheless.

Greg chuckled.

"That was a very dirty kiss," he said huskily.

"Hmmm," Gil nodded, leaning forward for another. Their mouths were barely touching when a pager suddenly went off. They looked up at the same time.

"Yours or mine?"

They both reached for their pagers.

"Mine," Greg said regretfully.

"We gotta go, anyway," Gil said, leaning back in his seat.

Greg concurred. They were making out in a Police Department vehicle. What were they thinking?

Grissom started to buckle up but paused for a moment.

"Greg? About what I said before…" he said, "If there's something you want to discuss -"

Greg almost rolled his eyes. Right. Like he was going to talk about that now. It didn't seem important, anymore.

"Nah," he said, "It's ok."

He reached for the ignition key but didn't turn it. He glanced at Grissom.

"Hum… Grissom? You have plans? For later, I mean."

"I have to go home," Gil said tentatively.

"Oh. Of course."

"Why?"

"Well... I was thinking that I've got a pound of Blue Hawaiian coffee -"

"Forty-dollars-a-pound Blue Hawaiian?" asked Grissom.

"It's forty-five now," Greg replied smugly.

Grissom kept his gaze on Greg.

"I like that coffee," he admitted quietly.

"Then maybe you could drop by later," Greg said, "I'm going home early today," he added, "I've been pulling doubles all week and I'm beat."

Gil paused as if he actually needed to think it over.

"I guess I could drop by," he said, "I've got to give you Janice's gifts after all."

"And the shirt."

"Ah, yes. The shirt."

"And the donuts," Greg added, "Don't forget the donuts."

Grissom smiled faintly.

"I won't." He said.

"It's settled, then," Greg said more confidently. "I'll have the coffee ready."

"Ok."

"Some paper, too," Greg said, giving Gil a suspicious look, "I wanna find out how much you really know about origami."

Grissom's eyebrows shot up.

"You don't believe me?"

Greg only smiled.

He was glad that Gil was back. He suddenly wanted to say it out loud…

But he didn't.

TBC

Thank you for reviewing...

Note: While I was writing this and the other post-Portland chapters, I accidentally tuned in an Anthony Bourdain show. He was visiting Portland, of all places! I found out about 'bacon-maple donuts' there .