Ryuugazaki: Fui ver mi tia por el tiempo final. Lloré mucho.
Chapter Twenty-Five
(Friday, 6 November 2015 – 12:22pm, Detroit, Michigan, USA)
Eduvigis was dancing flamenco with Yuuri after they got dressed. "Not in a rush to leave today?" Eduvigis asked as Yuuri clapped.
"Not today, no," Yuuri said as Eduvigis spun.
"Oh? Did something happen with Victor?" Yuuri made steps towards Eduvigis.
"We're going on a date tonight," Yuuri said. Eduvigis stopped dancing and stopped the music. "What?"
"When did this happen?" Eduvigis asked as she sat on the piano.
"He asked me out last week, remember?" Yuuri said. "He said he wanted to go before he went to Canada for an event, but time wasn't having that." Yuuri sat on the piano next to Eduvigis.
"Do you know what you have to do?"
"My sister gave me the talk before," Yuuri said.
"Yuuri, she played 'Let's Talk About Sex' and walked out of the room," Eduvigis said. Yuuri chuckled. "Go and buy condoms and lube. The Duane Reade by the hospital has them. Ask for Janelle. She doesn't give you stink eye when she rings you up." Yuuri suddenly had many questions for Eduvigis. Mainly, who is knocking her ankles loose and how does she know that "Janelle" won't give someone the side eye for buying condoms and lube? Eduvigis isn't married – not to Yuuri's knowledge, at least.
"What if he doesn't want to use condoms?" Yuuri asked.
"Well you'll have to persuade him to use them," Eduvigis said. "And if he won't be swayed, don't sleep with him. Having safe sex with new partners is important. You can have that talk with them at a later date and after STD tests."
"Yes, Mama," Yuuri said. Eduvigis smiled.
"I won't keep you long," Eduvigis said.
"Don't you want to keep dancing?"
"One more dance and then you must go," Eduvigis said after a silence. She jumped off of the piano and held out her hand towards Yuuri. Yuuri smiled.
#
(Friday, 6 November 2015 – 1:15pm, Detroit, Michigan, USA)
Yuuri stood in the Duane Reade by the hospital. They couldn't believe that they were taking Eduvigis' advice. They were going to put the moves on Victor tonight and maybe dig in his guts if things go right. They looked at the selection of condoms they had. They had Trojans, Magnums, Lifestyles, and Durex.
"Do you need help?" A woman in a Duane Reade shirt asked. Yuuri looked at her nametag. It was Janelle.
"Yeah, I'm looking for condoms that work."
"Well, what are you looking for? Ribbed? Pre-lubricated?" Yuuri blushed. They hadn't had to buy condoms in a long time.
"I don't know," Yuuri said. "What would you recommend?" Yuuri was really out of their depth here. They might as well take recommendations here.
"Well, Magnum's ecstasy condoms are great for when you want the feeling of not using condoms," Janelle said.
"I'm using these on a guy," Yuuri said.
"Perfect. These would be great for you," Janelle said. "You might need more lube, though. As you know, the rectum is not self-lubricating, and you want to make sure that there isn't any rectal tearing for next time." Yuuri blushed. "Next time?" They asked themselves. Did they want a "next time"? Janelle grabbed Yuuri's arm and led them to the lubricants.
"What would you recommend?" Janelle reached for a bottle of Boy Butter. "This?" Janelle nodded.
"It's a water-based lubricant, and you won't have to worry about ruining the bed sheets or destroying the condoms." Janelle put it in Yuuri's hands. "Do you need me to ring you up?"
"Yes please," Yuuri said. Janelle led Yuuri to the register. Yuuri picked up a Snickers bar to make things less awkward. Janelle warmly smiled at Yuuri as they paid for the condoms, lube, and Snickers.
"Have a fun time!" Janelle warmly said as she bagged the items. Yuuri put the bag in their dance bag and walked home. They were glad that they didn't have to run into that group of high schoolers today.
#
(Friday, 6 November 2015 – 5:39pm, Detroit, Michigan, USA)
The Cup of China begins tonight. Yuuri wanted to stay and watch it with Phichit, but they had a date. Phichit, keeping true to his word, picked out Yuuri's clothes and insisted that they had to dress to (figuratively) kill tonight. Yuuri went into the kitchen and got the box of wagashi they had made for tonight. After buying lube and condoms, making desserts for tonight, and ironing their clothes, Yuuri was getting cold feet.
"Phichit, I feel ridiculous," Yuuri said as they went into the living room and put the box of wagashi on the coffee table.
"But you don't look ridiculous," Phichit said. "You look very lovely. And if Khoudia was here, I'm sure she would say that you look very lovely, too." Right now, Yuuri would rather be going on a date with Khoudia. There's a taste in Yuuri's mouth. It tastes like nickels and bile and Satan's ejaculate. At least they wouldn't have that taste in their mouth with Khoudia.
"What if Victor is just wearing regular clothes and I overdressed for nothing?" Yuuri asked.
"Well, then he can't say that you don't look good." Phichit was beaming. He was happy about the outfit choice he made for Yuuri. He put Yuuri in a pair of charcoal grey dress pants and plum colored dress shirt. Yuuri tried various elaborate physical stims in their clothes to try and make himself comfortable in their dress clothes. "Ma poupée, are you feeling anxious?"
"Very much. I wish I had never said yes."
"Come on now, don't say that. It's a once in a lifetime opportunity," Phichit said as he yawned. "If I had the opportunity to go on a date with Jay Park and I said 'I wish I didn't have this opportunity,' you would take custody of the hamsters until I get my head on straight." Phichit's ultimate male bias is Jay Park. "You are going to go on your date with Victor, and I am going to sit here and wish that I had a date with Jay Park." Yuuri looked at Phichit. "Now sit down before you get your clothes wrinkled from your fidgeting." Yuuri yielded to Phichit and sat down.
"I kind of wish we'd go to a restaurant. I want to try this Cajun place," Yuuri said as they put their head on Phichit's shoulder. "One of my old dorm mates got this Doberge cake from there, and it was great." Phichit nodded. Yuuri didn't often bring up their dorm days, but, when they did, they had stories. A lot of stories. "I've heard that Cajun food is delicious." Phichit rested his head on Yuuri's head.
"Victor said he's coming to get you, right?" Phichit asked.
"He said he'd be here by 6pm." Yuuri threw their arm around Phichit's shoulder, and Phichit cuddled up to him.
"Mon lapin," Yuuri murmured.
"Ma poupée," Phichit said as he started to doze off in Yuuri's embrace. It was 5:45pm, and Victor still hadn't come to collect Yuuri. Victor rang their doorbell and Phichit shot up. He was early.
"Phichit, calm down," Yuuri said. Phichit answered the door. He came up to Victor's sternum. Yuuri grabbed their bag and the box of wagashi and rose to their feet.
"Hello!" Phichit squeaked.
"Are you Yuuri's roommate?" Victor asked. Phichit nodded. "You're even shorter than I expected." Yuuri stood behind Phichit and lovingly put their hand on his shoulder. "Hello, Yuuri," Victor said with a smile. Victor was in black dress pants and a stone blue shirt. Yuuri was glad that they weren't the only one dressed up.
"Hello Victor," Yuuri said.
"Your roommate is adorable," Victor remarked.
"Yeah, I know." Yuuri stroked Phichit's shoulder gently. "Je l'aime," Yuuri stuttered. They looked away from Victor. Phichit grinned. "We should get going."
"Right, right!" Phichit said. He stepped from in between the two and pushed Yuuri closer to Victor. They were chest to chest now. "I'll let you two get going. Behave yourselves!" Phichit hugged Yuuri from behind and closed the door. Yuuri sheepishly grinned.
"That was my roommate," Yuuri said. "He's like that." They chuckled. "We're going to the aquarium first, right?" Victor nodded and held out his hand for Yuuri. Yuuri grabbed it, and they walked down the stairs. Victor squeezed Yuuri's hand and grinned.
"I see you have your bag," Victor said they walked down the street. "Is your sketchbook in there?" Yuuri nodded. "This is unrelated, but did I do something that made you stop responding to me?" Yuuri looked over at Victor. "You just intermittently stopped responding to my messages for a few weeks." They stopped at a light.
"You didn't do anything," Yuuri said. Yuuri and Victor got stares from a passing family. "But you didn't do anything to me. I was just… I don't know. I've just been out of it." "Out of it" was an understatement, but that's all they can say without letting them know fully.
"Just had to make sure," Victor said. "What's in the box?"
"I made desserts." Victor grinned. "I think you're going to like them."
"I'm sure I'm going to."
#
(Friday, 6 November 2015 – 7:15pm, Detroit, Michigan, USA)
The aquarium was amazing. Yuuri was able to sketch a betta fish and a Pacific sea nettle before the aquarium closed. It was so beautiful, and Yuuri felt like they wanted to color the fish and the sea nettle in. They thought that watercolors would do them justice. Now they were on the bus, going to Victor's place for dinner. Victor was holding the box with care as Yuuri fumbled around in their bag. They didn't want to risk Victor seeing the bottle of lube and the condoms, so they decided to keep those in their pockets.
"Did you have fun?" Victor asked. Yuuri nodded. "I liked the sea turtles." Yuuri smiled. "Aside from the betta fish, what did you enjoy?"
"I liked the Giant Pacific octopus," Yuuri gushed. "The tentacles on the on the one in the aquarium were amazing." They grinned. "A true work of art. I can see why Hokusai drew them with the ama."
"What's an ama?"
"An ama is a deep-sea diver," Yuuri explained. "Have I showed you The Dream of the Fisherman's Wife?" Victor shook his head. "You need to see The Dream of the Fisherman's Wife." Yuuri had searched for the photo and showed it to Victor. "That's a woodblock portrait made by Hokusai." Victor nodded. "So? What do you think?"
"Is that what you were drawing?" Yuuri looked at Victor. "In September. I tried to look at what you were drawing, and you told me not to do that." Yuuri nodded. "Fascinating. So are drawings like that – the ones you do – are they normal for you?"
"As I've said, I draw what my heart wants."
"And what does your heart want right now?" Victor asked. He was looking down at Yuuri, waiting for him to respond. He never got that response. "Hm," Victor said. Victor put his arm around Yuuri and moved closer.
"I'm thinking of the sea nettle. It was so beautiful," Yuuri had muttered. Victor smiled reflexively.
"It was lovely." Victor snapped his fingers. "Oh! You're not allergic to anything, are you?" Yuuri shook his head. "Good," Victor had said.
"I didn't ask you, but how were the other skaters?" Yuuri asked. "I'm sure you have other friends aside from Christophe."
"Well, I saw Georgi. He's doing fine," Victor said. Yuuri nodded. "He has a girlfriend. His theme was newfound love this year." Yuuri smiled. "His costume is very flamboyant. I like the theatrical side of him." Victor shrugged. "Who else did I see?" Victor asked himself. "Oh, I saw Jean-Jacques Leroy." Yuuri nodded. "He's still annoying."
"Still?"
"Still." Victor shrugged. "Our stop is next." Victor got up and held his hand out towards Yuuri. Yuuri followed him to an exit and stood at his shoulder. "I hope you like film because I'm hoping that we can watch a few movies."
"What movies did you have in mind?"
"Nosferatu and I Killed My Mother," Victor said. Yuuri nodded. "I've also been meaning to watch a Studio Ghibli movie, but I don't know which one." Yuuri grinned. Victor looked at them grinning. "Do you have any suggestions?"
"Princess Mononoke and Spirited Away are my top two," Yuuri said.
"What's Spirited Away about?"
"A girl and her parents visit the spirit world, and the parents get turned into pigs," Yuuri said. They got off of the bus and started walking. Yuuri held out their hand, and Victor grabbed it. They just wanted the box. "I liked it."
"Have you heard of Grave of the Fireflies? What's that one about?" Yuuri fell silent.
"I would rather not discuss Grave of the Fireflies," Yuuri said. "Just know that it's… it's unfortunate."
"I see," Victor said. "So I suppose we'll be watching Princess Mononoke and Spirited Away." Victor smiled. "I'm so excited." They stopped at a light. "You've heard of Don Hertzfeldt, right?"
"He's the person who made the Rejected short, right?" Victor nodded. "I like that short."
"Do you want to watch It's Such a Beautiful Day?" Victor asked. "It's an hour long, and it's dreamlike." Yuuri waited for Victor to continue. "Or we can watch World of Tomorrow."
"Going by the names alone, both of them sound interesting. How long is World of Tomorrow?"
"About fifteen minutes," Victor said. The light changed, and they walked. "But there's so much in those fifteen minutes. I think you'd like it." Yuuri nodded. "'It was here on the moon I fell in love with a rock,'" Victor said.
"Is that from a Hertzfeldt animation?"
"Yes," Victor said. "You'll see where I got it from when we start watching movies."
"What did you make for dinner?" Yuuri asked. Victor told Yuuri what he has planned. They felt their stomach stir. It sounded like a lot of food for Yuuri, and they weren't sure if they were going to be able to eat all of that. It seemed great, sure, but could Yuuri stomach that? Could they eat comfortably with someone new? The situation was anxiety provoking, and Yuuri didn't bring their Xanax.
#
(Friday, 6 November 2015 – 9:27pm, Detroit, Michigan, USA)
From what Yuuri could see, Victor has a lovely apartment. Its primary colors were ivory, grey, and charcoal; the accent colors were shades of blue with lime green. Or was it chartreuse? Yuuri couldn't tell the difference between lime green and chartreuse. Their phone buzzed. Yuuri checked; it was Khoudia.
Khoudia: How's your date going, mon beau?
Yuuri wanted to respond, but they also wanted to give Victor their undivided attention. They made a mental note to reply to her texts when they had the chance. "What are you looking at?"
"A friend just texted me." Victor nodded.
"Aren't you going to respond?" Yuuri took out their phone and looked at Khoudia's text.
: It's going well. We're going to have dinner soon.
Khoudia: Ah! I'm glad your date is going well!
"I responded," Yuuri said. Victor was taking off his coat while Yuuri took off their shoes.
"What are you doing?"
"Taking off my shoes," Yuuri said. It sounded like they were unsure of their actions – which they weren't. They were very certain of this concrete action of theirs. Victor nodded. "Do Russians not take off their shoes when they enter a house?"
"We do, but you haven't taken off your coat yet," Victor said. "But don't let me stop you. You were already halfway done." Yuuri continued taking off their shoes. Phichit did an outstanding job at tying their shoes tonight. Yuuri got up and took off their coat. They hung up their bag with their coat. Victor started to take off his shoes, too. "How are you feeling right now?"
"Good," Yuuri said. Victor smiled. Yuuri stood in their spot and waited for Victor to finish taking off his shoes. They have no clue what they should be doing right now. Right now, they wished they had discussed what they should do in situations like these with Phichit before they left. Then Yuuri noticed that Victor has a fuzzy pair of grey and white slippers by the door. Victor went into this small closet by the door and took out a pair of slippers for Yuuri to put on.
"You look like you're in thought." Yuuri shrugged. "Did your roommate pick out your clothes this time?"
"He did. He insisted on it," Yuuri said. Victor smiled. "I couldn't stop him." Victor set the box of wagashi on the coffee table and went into the kitchen. Yuuri remained standing by the door. After a few minutes, Victor poked his head from out of the kitchen.
"Yuuri, you can have a seat," Victor told him.
"Do you need help in there?"
"I'm fine. Just sit down." Yuuri took a seat on the sofa and looked at their hands. They hyper-fixated on their hands. So much so that they didn't hear Victor come into the living room. Victor didn't say anything; instead, he just stood over Yuuri, watching them watch their hands.
"Why are you watching me?"
"I like looking at you. It's enlightening."
"I don't see what you can learn from me just by observing me, but okay," Yuuri muttered. "How's the food coming along?"
"A few more minutes and it should be done." Yuuri nodded. Victor sat next to Yuuri and turned towards him. He was smiling. He took deep breaths, and Yuuri just looked at him as he did it. "Do you want to say something?" Yuuri shook their head. "You're really quiet." Yuuri nodded. "Oh! Who was that friend that you texted?"
"Khadijah," Yuuri said, saying the Arabic form of Khoudia's name. Khoudia would default to "Khadijah" when meeting new people or when she didn't feel like repeating her name several times; Yuuri only called her "Khadijah" when they needed her attention, wanted to bother her, or, in this case, wanted to make talking about her easier. Victor nodded. "She was just asking how my date was going."
"Does she know that you're with me?"
"With you or with you?" Yuuri said. "Because if you mean with you, then yes. But if you mean with you, no." Victor nodded.
"What's the difference?"
"She knows I'm out with a person, but she doesn't know that that person is you." Victor nodded.
"Is Khadijah nice? Do you like her?" Yuuri smiled at the way Victor said "Khadijah." It sounds different coming from him.
"Khadijah is an absolute joy," Yuuri said. They didn't know what else they could say about Khoudia that would convey how much she mesmerized them. Perhaps Khoudia was just someone that needed to be experienced rather than described, explained. That's the only thing Yuuri could think of that could explain why they couldn't verbalize the way Khoudia is. "Yes, an absolute joy."
"Were you going to say something else?"
"I was trying to find words I could use to describe Khadijah, but I can't." Yuuri looked at their slightly trembling hands. "So I suppose that I'll stick with 'absolute joy.'"
"I see… And she's okay with you being here?" Yuuri wasn't precisely sure what Victor was implying here. Why would Khoudia have a problem with Yuuri being here? She knows they're on a date; she's happy that they're on a date.
"Well, I'm here, aren't I?" Yuuri said.
"But she –"
"– is fine with me being here, knows I am here, and is happy for me," Yuuri said. The mood of the room went south just like Yuuri's mood. They were confused – more so – and didn't have a grasp on what was going on. It's one of those conversations where you feel like there's an underlying meaning and you're talking about something innocuous in public. Except that there is no public and that, usually, everyone has an idea of what is being discussed.
The mood didn't dissipate after Victor dropped the conversation. It was pervasive. It permeated and tainted the food they ate, the movies they watched, and the other interactions they've had. Right now, Yuuri would like nothing more than to have a lovely, intimate sob in their bathroom in the apartment they shared with their best friend and precious cinnamon roll.
#
(Friday, 6 November 2015 – 11:33pm, Detroit, Michigan, USA)
Victor and Yuuri were on the sofa watching Nosferatu. They had watched Spirited Away after dinner. They were at that famous part of the movie where Count Orlok was walking up the stairs. Victor was holding Yuuri in his arms and playing with the top button of Yuuri's shirt. Yuuri was snuggled up to Victor on the sofa. "Oh, that reminds me," Victor said. He reached over towards the end table by the sofa and stuck a note in Yuuri's shirt pocket. "Read that when you have the chance."
"I will," Yuuri said. Victor resumed playing with Yuuri's shirt buttons. "Why are you playing with my shirt?"
"I want you," Victor blurted out. He covered up his mouth. "I'm sorry. I–I… I want you."
"Want me where?"
"In my bed," Victor said.
"Okay, so let's go to bed then," Yuuri said. They got up and started to unbutton their shirt.
"You know what I mean, right?" Victor asked.
"Yeah. Let's go to bed."
"Aren't you going to kiss me first?" Victor asked.
"Oh, you want me to kiss you?" Yuuri asked. Victor nodded. Yuuri sat back down and kissed Victor. Victor wrapped his arms around Yuuri and kissed them back. Then it hit Yuuri. Victor wants them in his bed.
They could live with that.
#
(Saturday, 7 November 2015 – 1:54am, Detroit, Michigan, USA)
The room was dark and quiet. Earlier the only sounds that could be heard were the sound of the bed and Victor's moans. They laid next to each other in the silence. Yuuri had their back turned to Victor. Victor tentatively stroked Yuuri's arm with his fingertips. "Yuuri."
"Yes?"
"Look at me," Victor said.
"Why?"
"I just want you to look at me," Victor said. He gently stroked Yuuri's face.
"I should go home," Yuuri absently said.
"Stay the night," Victor urged. "It's kind of late, don't you think?" Yuuri shrugged. "At least stay with me until the morning. We can have breakfast together."
"I don't eat breakfast," Yuuri said.
"At all?"
"At all," Yuuri said.
"Then we can have tea or coffee," Victor suggested. "I know you don't drink coffee, but I want you to stay with me. I'll show you how to use a moka pot. I'll teach you how to use a samovar." Victor gently planted a kiss on Yuuri's lips. "Just… Stay. Please." Yuuri gently kissed Victor. Victor kissed Yuuri back. "So you'll stay?"
"I haven't left yet," Yuuri simply said.
"That isn't very comforting," Victor said. "Say you'll stay."
"I'll stay," Yuuri murmured. Victor smiled wistfully and kissed Yuuri again.
"I could kiss you forever," Victor said.
"And never get tired of it?" Yuuri asked. Victor nodded. Yuuri smiled and kissed Victor. "We should go to sleep. For tomorrow." Yuuri snuggled up to Victor. Then they were met with the need to pee. Victor already had his arm wrapped around Yuuri. "Victor?"
"Yes?"
"I have to use the bathroom," Yuuri said.
"The bathroom is across the hall," he said. Yuuri got out of Victor's warm and soft bed and his warm embrace and grabbed a pair of boxers from off the floor. They could be theirs or Victor's, but it didn't matter. They pulled them on and went into Victor's bathroom to relieve themselves. After they were done and they washed their hands, they went into the living room. The living room looked nice in the dark. It was spacious, and Yuuri could easily do ballet there. So Yuuri started to do their stims until they felt better. As they stimmed, they thought about how quickly today went from being an anxious mess to not being as bad to being a disaster to being… satisfying. They got what they wanted – and they wanted this – but what does that mean for tomorrow? "Yuuri!"
"Yeah?"
"Come to bed. I miss you," Victor whined. Yuuri smiled and decided to go back to bed. Victor's warm embrace and kisses greeted them. It felt nice being next to Victor in bed. They could get used to this.
#
(Saturday, 7 November 2015 – 6:44am, Detroit, Michigan, USA)
"Yuuri," Victor said as he nudged them.
"I'm trying to sleep," Yuuri mumbled.
"I can see that," Victor said. "But it's morning."
"So?"
"So get out of bed and have tea with me," Victor said. Yuuri looked up at him. He was smiling brightly and already dressed in some sweats and an olive-green V-neck. Yuuri sleepily got out of bed and looked around. "Do you need something to wear?"
"I can just put on my clothes from yesterday," Yuuri said.
"Be comfortable with me," Victor said. He got up and went to his drawer. He pulled out a pair of pants and a t-shirt for Yuuri. Yuuri slowly put it on and followed Victor to the kitchen. Victor said that he was going to teach Yuuri how to use a moka pot. So learn how to use a moka pot they shall.
Ryuugazaki: I feel sad :^((