Chapter 25
When Andy came home, he noticed that there is no one. Perhaps Emily, Ricky and Rusty were out with Anna. He was grateful that they weren't here. He didn't want them to see their mother in this state - especially Anna. Andy quickly ran into the bedroom. He saw Sharon standing in front of the mirror with scissors in hand. He grabbed her hand and managed to take the scissors. Sharon glared at him, tears streaming down her cheeks. He sighed and shook his head, throwing the scissors on the nightstand.
Sharon sat on the bed without looking at Andy. He sat beside her and looked at her carefully. Strtseto tore him to pieces, seeing the woman he loves in this state. He was helpless, he couldn't help her. Her pain was immense - he knew it. Sharon wiped her tears and looked at him coldly. He could see the emptiness and coldness in her eyes. She had never felt so bad. And now, none of them knew what to do. As if they were at labirinit where there is no exit.
"Sharon, why are you doing this? You've never been like that. It's not you. You've always been a strong woman. You always deal with any difficulty. Why? Now what has changed? Why are you so weak? Why don't you fight as before? " he asked quietly and swallowed the lump in his throat. Sharon took a deep breath and replied softly, "You're right, Andy. I've always been a strong woman who fought to the end and which deal with any difficulty. Yes, I admit. Maybe I'm weak and I don't fight. But you know, I see no reason. No reason to fight this disease. "
Andy looked at her sadly, his eyes filled with tears. With great difficulty, he replied firmly, "There's a reason Sharon. Your children need you. You're not thinking about Anna? She's so small. Sharon, she's not ready to lose her mother. You think about her? Anna needs her mother as Emily, Ricky and Rusty, too. It's still early, you can't go away just like that ... " Sharon looked at him with a slight smile.
"You're right. You're right about that too. I know that Anna is too small to lose her mother. I know that my daughter can't live without me, I know she needs a mother's love. But ... Andy, why you don't want to know how I feel? I don't want to die, but I know this bitter truth. My end is near. " she said, crying quietly. Andy sat close to her and squeezed her hand, looking into her bright green eyes with love.
"Sharon, just stop talking like that. You're going to recover. You'll be healthy as before." he said encouragingly. Sharon shook her head and touched her hair, which dropped further. She showed him handfuls of her hair in her hands.
"See this? You still think that I have hope? No, Andy. My hair's dripping, my body is becoming weaker and weaker. I can no longer work, I can't even walk as before. I feel more exhausted than ever. " she admitted. Andy looked at her. He hugged her tightly, rubbing her back soothingly.
"Sharon, we knew that this would happen. The doctor warned us. He told us that your hair will start to drip. But, look, everything will be fine, trust me. From now on, you'll wear a wig. " Suddenly, Sharon's eyes widened.
"Wig? Andy, you kidding? I can't wear a wig. I'll not do that, never!" she almost shouted. Andy hushed quietly.
"Sharon, calm down. But there is no other way. You know very well that your hair's dripping because of the chemotherapy. But everything will be fine. We'll find a suitable donor, and everything will be fine. You'll have a good hair than before." He tried to calm her, but it wasn't possible. Sharon stood up and stood before him, looking at him sternly.
"Andy, I don't want to talk more. Leave me alone, please." she asked. Andy wiped her tears and stroked her face with his thumb.
"Sharon, I can't leave you here alone. I don't want and will not do it." he said firmly. He was afraid that she might hurt herself.
"Andy, don't complicate the things, please. Just get out, I need to be alone. Please." She looked at him imploringly. Andy nodded slightly, kissed her on the forehead and left. Sharon locked the door while Andy went into the living room and sat on the couch, thoughtfully. He closed his eyes for a moment. He just couldn't believe what was happening.
With each passing day, Sharon was melting before his eyes, she just was dying. Like she is dead. He was helpless and didn't know what to do. The worst was that they couldn't find a suitable donor. He was afraid to think about it, but her end was really close if they don't find a bone marrow donor immediately. He wiped his tears and looked at his watch.
He decided to talk to her doctor. He just needed to talk, while Emily, Ricky, Rusty and Anna return home. He immediately grabbed his phone. "Hello, Doctor, I'm Andy. I'd like to talk about my wife - Sharon Flynn. I'd like to know if we can find a suitable donor. Today, my wife received a crisis and now she's in the room and doesn't want to talk to me . Her hair began to drip and she refused to wear a wig. " he explained heatedly.
"Mr. Flynn, calm down. In fact, this is a normal reaction on her part. She's always been a strong woman who is dealing with any difficulty and now, she just can't accept that truth." the doctor said calmly. Andy took a deep breath and continued, "But, Doctor, I can't stand to see my wife that way. She's dying before my eyes. I can't stand it. I need to do something. I can't lose Sharon. We need to find a suitable donor . "
"Mr. Flynn sad for me to tell you this, but still no response from the blood banks. There is simply no suitable donor for Sharon. Sorry, I wouldn't like to tell you this. We'll continue with the chemotherapy, but it'll make her weak and exhausted. You know that whatever happens we can't continue with chemotherapy to infinity. We must stop this process because her body poisons and ... "the doctor couldn't finish.
Andy sighed wearily. He felt his heart stop. He could feel the drops of tears on his cheeks. He'd never cried for anyone. But now he was crying - for the first time. He was crying for Sharon. He couldn't lose her. And it was so early. He cleared the throat and said quietly, "What do you mean Doctor? That Sharon will die? '"
"I'm sorry Mr. Flynn." Andy immediately hung up and wiped his tears, seeing that Emily, Ricky, Rusty and Anna come back happy. He didn't want them to know about today's event.
"Oh, Andy. You're here?" Emily asked with a slight smile.
"It's weird. It's still early. Usually you come back later." Ricky noted, while Rusty helped Anna get undressed. Andy took a deep breath and looked at them.
"Actually, I felt tired and wanted to see how's Sharon."
"Andy, how's Mom? She's good, right?" Rusty asked immediately, still helping his sister. Andy shook his head. "Let's talk later. I don't want Anna to hear that." he said quietly. Emily and Ricky looked at each other with fear. Anna immediately ran to her father.
"Dad, today was great in school. I want to see my mom." Andy kissed her cheek and smiled softly.
"Honey, your mother now sleeps. But I promise you that after dinner you'll see her. '"
"No, Dad. You always say that. I want my mom!" Anna said firmly and wept. Andy took her in his arms, rubbing her back soothingly.
"Anna, this time really you'll see your mother and talk to her. She's in her room. Don't worry, but first let's have dinner." Andy wiped her tears.
While they dined, Sharon sat on the floor in her bedroom, looking at the emptiness. She was crying softly. She didn't know what was happening to her life. First there were problems with Jack and now this insidious disease. The saddest part was that she should go before she saw how Anna grows. Her desire was that. She even thought to have another child with Andy - yes, it was a little late for another child, but she wanted to have this chance with the man whom she loves.
But now everything was different. Now it all seemed like a nightmare that never ends. She didn't want to leave her children and Andy. She didn't know what to do. A whole month they couldn't find a suitable bone marrow donor, and she had lost hope. She stood up and took her diary from the drawer. She needed to share her feelings right now.
"When I feel bad, Andy always tells me, "Think that this is a dream, close your eyes and when you open them, everything will be as it was before. Every day I lose hope and my fear grows ... I'm terrified that I could part with my beloved family... But then, I remember Andy's words. I see my children that want me to be healthy as before. Then again I say to myself, "This is a bad dream that will soon be over." Andy and my children's love will give me new life. Every morning I open my eyes with the same hope ... Andy takes care of me as a child ... I feel that my daughter Anna understands everything, although she's small. But I know she'll not even remember those days. It remains a little and the terrible nightmare will end ... "
After dinner, Anna insisted to see her mother. Andy had no choice. He took Anna in his arms and was suprised when he saw Sharon in front of the bedroom, which was waiting for them. She smiled softly and took her daughter in her arms, kissing her gently.
"How's my little princess?" Sharon asked softly with a smile.
"Mom, I'm very well. But I miss you. I almost didn't see you. You're always ill and in hospital." Sharon looked at her daughter with a sad smile and stroked her hair.
"Look, Anna, I'm a little sick, but soon I'll be fine, don't worry. When my treatment finished I promise that I'll always be with you, whatever happens." she said and swallowed the lump in her throat. Anna kissed her mother and hugged her. Andy watched them with a sad smile. He could cry every moment. After Anna slept and Sharon and Andy were alone in their bedroom, Andy decided to ask her.
"Sharon, I was very pleasantly surprised when I saw you in front of this door, with hope as before." he admitted and looked into her green eyes. Sharon looked into his brown eyes with coldness. She bit her lip and took a deep breath, sitting on the bed. Andy sat beside her, waiting for an answer.
"I know what you mean. Perhaps you want to say that I'm as before. But this isn't true. I did this for Anna. I don't want my daughter to know even a little about my illness. I can't bear it. But I don't have hope . I know I'm dying. '"
"No, Sharon. You can't lose hope just like that. We still have time. I know very well that we can find a suitable donor. You'll see everything will be fine. And I want to show you something." he said firmly, and went to the wardrobe. Sharon looked at him confused. He showed her wig the color of her hair. Yes, it was like her hair but actually wasn't. She took the wig in her hands and looked coldly.
"Do you like it?" he asked quietly. He knew very well that she would never want to wear a wig, but she had no choice. Sharon sighed wearily and nodded slightly.
"Yes, it is the color of my hair, actually. You're right, this wig is beautiful. Thank you." she said coldly. Andy squeezed her hand reassuringly.
"Sharon, whatever happens, you'll not die. I promise you that we'll find a suitable donor. Everything will be fine. Trust me." he kissed her gently on the lips, while Sharon smiled slightly, but sad at the same time.
The next morning, all have breakfast together. Emily, Ricky and Rusty were impressed with their mother's new hair. Anna didn't stop to ask questions why her mother decided to change the color of her hair. She understood everything, she was smart child. Sharon was proud of her daughter. Andy had explained everything so well. Sharon was grateful for his help. He really was a very good father to Anna.
Today, Andy had an appointment with her doctor before the chemotherapy. While Emily, Ricky and Rusty had taken Anna to school, Nicole had decided to accompany Sharon and her father. While Andy was talking to the doctor, Sharon and Nicole sat in the waiting room.
"Sharon, if I have to admit this hairstyle fits your style more." Nicole said with a smile. Sharon laughed.
"Nicole, don't talk about these things. I can't replace my hair with a wig and you know this very well. You know that I agreed with this chemotherapy and to wear this wig quite difficult." Nicole nodded slightly.
"I know that. But you're very stubborn and I am convinced that you'll overcome this disease." she said firmly. Sharon smiled and hugged her. Nicole was like her daughter. She also, was like her father. She gave her courage and strength.
After the chemotherapy, Sharon was at home with her children. Andy has been in the department for a major murder case. Once the team had solved the case, they decided to talk to Andy about their captain. They didn't know anything. Andy sat on his desk and leaned back, ready to tell all to his colleagues.
"Sharon isn't good. She poisons her body with chemotherapy a whole month. We still can't find a suitable donor. Even the doctor told me that if we don't find a suitable donor, she ... She could die. Yes, seems impossible, but it's the truth. I wouldn't want to say that. She had already lost hope. The doctor said we should stop the chemotherapy. And now, I don't know what to do. Sharon melts before my eyes. She's dying. I can see this. " he said, crying. The whole team was ready to cry by his words.
Provenza squeezed his shoulder, saying, "Andy, believe me, whatever happens, the captain is a strong woman. She'll be fine. ''
"Yes, Lieutenant, there is still time. We can find a suitable donor." Sykes added. Andy nodded slightly.
"Andy, Sharon will fight this disease, believe me." Andrea told reliably.
"I know what you want to tell me, but Sharon lost hope. She no longer believe that we can find a suitable bone marrow donor. ''
"Lieutenant, the captain is in a shock, that's normal." Tao said firmly.
"Let's talk with other blood banks?" Sanchez suggested.
"Yes, Julio's right." Buzz agreed. Andy shook his head.
"I already talked about. The doctor said that there is no suitable donor. Incidentally, tonight we expect you to dinner. I want Sharon to feel better and I know that this is possible in your company." Andy said with a sad smile.
In the evening, when they were all together, Nicole had prepared a special surprise for Sharon and Andy. She had prepared some special moments of their wonderful life, their love. All were enjoying the film, especially Sharon and Andy. Andy was pleased that Sharon feels better.
Suddenly Provenza stood up and said with a smile, "The love between Sharon and Andy is stormy, like fire. From the first day we experienced many things. They experienced many difficulties, but never gave up their love. From them, we learned to replace the disputes with friendship. From them, we learned to love one another. They are the biggest sign. " Sharon and Andy laughed loudly, and everyone else too.
After long discussions, all danced slowly. Sharon and Andy danced very slowly and gently. Sharon hugged Andy tightly. He was nestled in her. They looked at each other with a smile. Suddenly, Sharon stopped. Her nose began to bleed and she fainted in Andy's arms. Everyone was shocked. Fortunately, Anna was with Emily, Ricky and Rusty out. Anna would be frightened if she saw her mother in this way.
"Sharon, can you hear me? Sharon?" Andy shouted worried. Sharon slowly opened her eyes and said quietly, almost without force, "I don't feel well."
"We'll go to the hospital. Somebody call 911!" Andy said loudly.
"I'll call, calm down." Provenza said firmly and concerned.
After about 1 hour, all they were waiting for the doctor. Andy couldn't find a place. He was afraid he might lose Sharon. When the doctor finally came, Andy immediately stood before him, asking, "Doctor, how is Sharon? Why she fainted again?"
"Calm down. Probably again some infection. Tonight she'll be here under observation. After a few minutes the results will be ready, I'll be in my office." the doctor said firmly. Andy nodded slightly. During this time, the team had to leave because there was another rough murder case. Emily, Ricky and Rusty knew that their mother was in the hospital, but tried to hide it from Anna. On the other hand, Nicole and Andrea were close to Andy. A few minutes later, the results were ready. Andy was in the doctor's office.
"What are the news?" Andy asked with fear.
"We can't stem the infection." the doctor said and sighed, looking at the results.
"How so?" Andy asked heatedly.
"The body is too exhausted and the disease progresses too quickly. The chemotherapy didn't give the desired result." the doctor explained.
"What do we do then, Doctor?" Andy shouted. He couldn't believe that Sharon is dying before his eyes. The doctor sighed and continued, "We'll stop the chemotherapy and pray to find a bone marrow donor. ''
"If we don't find? What will happen then?" Andy asked quietly crying.
"Then it worse. You have to be ready for everything." the doctor said sadly.
Andy still couldn't believe that their lives had become like hell. Already there was no hope. He could lose Sharon. But he didn't want it. He couldn't allow that. He entered the room and sat beside her, squeezing her hand with a smile. Sharon smiled slightly and her eyes filled with tears.
"I want you to be strong." he said softly and swallowed the lump in his throat. Sharon stroked his face and said quietly, "Andy ... I entrust my children to you. Take care of my kids."
"Wait a minute ... Sharon, stop talking nonsense!" Andy said sternly. Sharon took a deep breath and shook her head.
"You'll be a good father to Anna, a true father. Don't be aside from her, please." She looked at him imploringly.
"Sharon, please, stop, enough." Andy said quietly, tears streaming down his cheeks.
"Andy, I'm dying. No one and nothing can save me. Promise for my children promise for Anna. Please. I don't want Anna to feel my absence. I beg you. '"
"You'll not die, Sharon." he insisted.
"Andy, please promise me." Andy nodded and kissed her gently.
"Well, I promise you. But you'll see. Everything will be fine. "He hugged her hard. Both wept together. The fear that they can be separated from one another so quickly, frightened them. They couldn't live without each other. Everything seemed like a nightmare. So unreal ... As if nothing would make sense...
~~~ TBC ~~~