"Why are you promising now not to stage anymore protests, when you wouldn't promise me before?" Asked Sybil as she sat on one of the Downton library desks, swinging her legs.

Tom stopped scrolling through the books and turned to look at her. He had just been assuring her he would not involve himself in anything that would put his job in jeopardy after she had questioned his apologetic text from the 'almost' protest. He was now explaining that in the end he had chosen not to go through with it.
"I had my reasons." He mumbled, choosing not to tell her that it was his love for her that had stopped him. If he felt she would accept it, he would tell her he loved her every second of the day. But as it was she was probably not ready yet and he was content in their relationship as it was, for the moment anyway.

Noticing she had her eyebrows raised in questioning, he looked over his shoulders to check they were alone and walked over to her. The way she looked at him in suspicion spread a grin across his face and he pushed her knees apart slightly so he could stand between them against the desk she was sat on. Ever since they had settled into what he could only describe as a secret affair of stolen moments he could barely keep his hands off of her.

Thinking of a couple of these stolen but wonderful moments they had recently shared, Tom ran his fingers along her spine, his rough skin catching on her shirt and in strands of her hair. There had been the afternoon when he had gotten her into trouble with Anna by removing the majority of her lipstick before a very important interview. And the morning she had come to ask him for the car had resulted in the quickest bra re-clasp in history when Edith had come to make a request of her own. His favourite however had been when she had simply played with his hair and kissed him in comfort the day they had found themselves in a particularity stressful hour of gridlock traffic. It may only be an innocent affair compared to what it could be, but that only made things worse for Tom.

Every time he saw her in her signature pencil skirts or pushing her hair back across her face he would feel himself ache to take her there and then. But he knew that their relationship was classed above severely complicated and the fact she let him near her physically in any way was a gift. The only problem with this however was that he was a man who had barely gone a month, since losing his virginity down an alley at fifteen, without sleeping with someone. And now it had been almost 3 months since the girls after Sybil's departure. It really didn't help that the woman he was waiting for the most beautiful, stunning woman in the world. And being in love with her didn't exactly help either...

He still couldn't fathom that in his mind, in love, him. Every time he found himself getting lost in this thought, he would think of how him and his friends back home used to tease whichever of their numbers had found themselves at the mercy of a woman; and now he was the one lost to love.

Nuzzling Sybil's neck, he tried to rid his mind of the thoughts of what he would like to be doing with her in this empty library. He heard her sigh in a thoughtful way and pulled back to look at her, his eyebrows now the ones curved in questioning.

"You won't be content to stay at Downton forever will you?" He noted that her voice sounded sad at the thought of him one day leaving the hotel and tried to lighten her mood with a smile. "You won't want to tinker at an engine when you could be out enjoying some freedom. In fact, I thought you'd have gone home to Dublin in your easter break?"

"I might have, if my family had all been able to get a day off in less than 6 short bloody weeks." The more he thought about his family, the more he missed home. It had been a while since he had seen the familiar sights of Ireland. To ease his stab of homesickeness he gave into a little of his control and began to kiss Sybil's neck. As he did so, she wrapped her arms over his shoulders pulling him closer. Grazing his teeth on her throat, his empty feeling of homesickeness was suddenly replaced with the hollow feeling of having someone so close, yet so far away all at once. This unwelcome void in his stomach caused him to bite on the same small spot of her neck one more time before he pulled away from her to continue examining the books. "The truth is, I'll stay at Downton until you want to come away with me."

"Don't be ridiculous." She giggled slipping off of the desk, not understanding his serious tone. "Surely that would go against how careful we've been?"

"I meant together, properly." He wasn't sure why he was suddenly voicing his wishes but he just couldn't stop himself. He hadn't meant to suddenly turn their secret meeting so serious, but he couldn't keep fooling himself he was alright to remain hidden like this. Even she had said it, he would not be content to stay at Downton forever. "You're too scared to admit it like I have, but you're in love with me."

As he turned to stare into her shocked face and attempted to think of a way to rationalise his outburst, he felt someone tap his shoulder. He turned to find Miss Mary infront of him, her hair down straight, her make up free of any imperfections as usual.

"Branson, my pagers broken and Carson said you were in here. Could you take me to Selfridges at three? Oh, Sybil I didn't see you there, I'm getting some things for mum is there anything you want?"

Tom looked at Sybil, noting her blank features as she stammered "Nothing y-you can find in Selfridges." And with that she walked past them and out of the library.

o o o

Strutting down the hallway and allowing William to open the large doors for her, Sybil took in the fresh air. A few people took photos of her as she stood on the stairs pretending to check her phone. They took in her perfect profile, but knew nothing of her inner turmoil. Obviously Tom had told her of his feelings and she was gradually coming to the understanding that he meant all he said. But now he was questioning her affections? She knew things between them certainly crossed casual and their physical attachment definitely crossed the line, but she had becomed settled with this, not considering how she actually felt for him. Did she love him? Love him? It was insane, was she really in love with her chauffeur? What did it mean to be in love? As far as she was concerned love existed only in books and films, not in her life where she was expected to marry into fame or wealth to be sure she was not being taken for granted, regardless of how she may feel about such an arrangement. But now she was faced with a man who believed he loved her and who demanded that she should feel the same for him. To love him? To be in love with him?

"What were you talking to Branson about when I came into the library?" Quesioned a cool voice.

Jumping at the unexpected presence Sybil stuttered, "N-nothing."

Mary looked her up and down before sliding on her dark glasses. "Then why were you there?"

Feeling foolish at having been cornered Sybil tried to redirect the question. "Why were you there?"

"Because I was asking for a lift, isn't that why we talk to the chauffeur, to plan journeys?" Enquired Mary, her voice shrewd and suspicious.

Although straight talking Mary was the last person Sybil wanted to reveal all to, she could not help being annoyed at how she disregarded Tom. "He is a person, we can discuss other things."

"Excuse me, could I have a photo with both of you?" Gushed a nervous young girl, holding out her Kodak.

The moment they had fixed on their smiles and kissed the girl goodbye Mary continued their conversation prior to the interruption. "I'm sure he can, but not with you."

Feeling weakened by all her emotional beating of the day Sybil replied rather waspishly. "What do you want from me? Am I to find some international footballer, or an actor whos even richer than that?"

Removing her glasses, her eyes suddenly concerned, Mary reached out to her sister. "Darling what's the matter, I'm on your side!"

As unexpected tears formed in her eyes with the sudden stress of the world on her shoulders, Sybil pushed past Mary and made for the hotel doors. Pausing as William pulled open the door she looked over her shoulder to a stunned Mary. "Then be on my side!"

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