Space Cadet
Staring at the hellish red sky depressed me, turning to Sebastian I asked him to turn back but he was beyond words at this point driving into darkness. That darkness marked the edge of the sector the farthest we could venture before abandoning this blissful simulation. Sebastian switched off the engine stepping out of the car staring up at the starless sky. I watched him in confusion but said nothing, interrupting him would be pointless he had a tendency to daze off when speaking of a traumatic memory I have learned the hard way to give him his space.
"Pshhh Houston come in Houston." I said cupping my hand over my mouth creating a fake 'radio voice' as if I was a NASA member radioing in.
"Houston our captain is gazing into nothingness like a space cadet copy pshhh." I said to myself smiling observe Sebastian actions and reporting them back to the control operating back down in "earth".
Sebastian POVI could hear Ciel pretending to be some space cowboy and smiled shaking my head, but yet even still my head did not turn in his direction. Retelling that part of my life always made me think, where would I be if I went with that officer would I have gotten the help I needed to cope properly? Would I have not needed a wandering dragon to find me at my lowest and pick me, dust me off, set my feet of solid ground? Would I have even ever contacted with Ciel? And if so would I have had the tools to handle things differently? And was revenge so much more important than true safety, love, and happiness? I think about how my life is now and how it was then and it is almost surreal…I made it for heaven's sake I told myself that I would probably die in that home but look where I am now. Seeing him Lawrence, my father, predator, hell raiser…whatever it is you want to call him, and looking at my relationship with Ciel a boy not even half my own age am I really, honestly, and truly just like him. I tell myself no, I tell myself I'm not, I say to myself I'm different, I'm better…but am I really?
From day to day I speak to my lover and I can here myself saying the very words my father would say to me to him. It makes me freeze; I know at some point or another most vow to never be like their parent. Some say they will never hit their kids, scream at their kids, lie to their kids even speak to their children in the same condescending tone their parents would use. Unfortunately at some point or another your parents traits show up in you whether you're with your children or even those you are intimate with. Scary….truly and utterly scary when you think of it.
From here I can hear Ciel giggling to himself reporting my actions back to what are they call it NASA? I turned give him a cock eyed look shaking my head he only laughed harder having a grand old him by himself in the car. I can recollect about my past all I like, till hell freezes or what does the American's say the cow jumps over the moon…..or is it till the cows come home? Gahh never mind that, 'Phoenix you must be tired you memory is failing you.' Falling back into reality I smiled at him sitting there in the passenger seat cheeks pink from laughing clutching his stomach, a rare sight indeed. My present was unnoticed as I re-entered the car leaning over the shift stick cupping my hand around Ciel's face his laughter ceased and he stared at me in shock but welcomed my soft kiss clinging onto me longing for more. That night we make love more passionately than ever before perhaps it was because my dominance was challenged though you can't rule out the uncharacteristic happiness erupting my little lover make him more responsive to sexual passes. Regardless the moans and pants filled the car the excessive body heat fogging up the windows as the temperatures dropped for being on the outskirts of the sector. We rocked the car our movements were slow and sensual not like our usually fast rigorous and border line abusive. Soft kisses, gentle pulls, high pitched mewls rolling thrust we lost track of the time to the low hum of the radio playing k-pop with occasional English charming in here and there. We awoke in the morning our coats uses as blankets atop of our naked body entangled waking up to the alluring morning groggy and stiff but comfortable and secure awaking up in each other's arms. But life went on from visiting Ciel's parent's to play a sexual game of cat and mouse throughout the house. Time rolled on easy-going and playful but this life go boring, so once more I suggested if Ciel would like to venture back to earth enough time has passed by and we of course would not be dwell in England for a good century so instead I proposed Russia or Australia.
"Hmmm… Russia is a certain no gayness didn't go over too well in the Olympics, and I'm certain if get pissed at you and report you, Russia is probably the last place you would want that to happen in." He shrugged turning the page of his newspaper bringing his Earl Gray tea to his lips. By this time he, Ceil has grown into a fine young man, tall and lean I can no longer refers to him as a child if you didn't know better you'd think he's 18, which put my soul at rest. Mating with him whilst he looked like a 15year old was bad enough and lets not even brush upon when he looked 2 years younger than that, it honestly. So this is where we are now, our condo in Australia looking over the seascape on the 21 floor. Ciel returned back to highschool finishing his last year so he no longer could pose as a fresh man, damn he's too tall….ha didn't think I ever say that. As for myself at my devastating mid-night life crisis and brush with the law –sighs- I now dropped the stethoscope and exchanged it for a drafting pencil, designing building drafting on blueprint and a slave to the T-square and ruler bend over a table working under adjustable lamp my life as an architect . It is a change that I can admit life is different apposed to long day of cat naps and marathons are over. I am home more often, in the living room drafting a floor plan for a new aqua center that was going downtown. The key jiggled and the door was pushed open Ciel dropped his bag at the drop announcing his entry his voice was no longer this high pitched laced with masculine but was deep and firm there was no denying his manliness.
"Well I have returned." He yelled.
"Oh welcome back is it that time already?" I looked up at the time and indeed it was that time. Our conversation was typical how was your day Sebastian oh you done that floor plan are you working on elevations next? This was our new life. Evening came I returned for the office after giving the contractors the new blue prints. Calling for Ciel, who was at the kitchen table under working under low light.
"Your eyes will go bad working like that." I smirked pecking him softly on the cheek heading to the fridge. He smiled looking up from his text book watching me giving me a long analyzing the contours of my body.
"Yes?"
Ciel sighed shaking his head going back to his work. That evening was somber low-key and quiet it wasn't until we were cuddling up in bed before a conversation. As he cling to my chest smelling my neck I decided I would finish my story so I can focus on bigger things …mother…..
"Ciel listen up, there not much left I will tell what I can, no matter how grim, of what I can remember. So let's finish the story it won't be long." I Whispered holding him tight, he snuggled his nose against my shirt and with that I began once…and for all. HAHAHAHA Another chapter done ok ok the next part might get confusing the next like 5sum chapters are all flash back of the rest of the story once that's done the end will be focused on the present then that's it. thanks for hanging in there guys I will be sure to keep it interesting for yea resisting the urge to right the next one right now actually xD S.R.