4x14 reaction drabble and anon request: Caroline realizes something after Klaus tells her all his actions that day were for her.
Caroline stared blankly into warm night from her stilled position on the Gilbert porch. It might be southern Virginia and that meant temperate winters but all the cold of the Arctic chilled her veins as she tried to process what just happened to her.
Why did his words hold such power over her? "It was all for you, Caroline," he had said. Maybe it was the honesty in his eyes or the utter understanding that he meant every word. God, why did he have to say such things! Why did he make it so difficult to try and refuse him? She breathed in deeply, realizing her hands were shaking and her knees were starting to buckle, there was too much emotion drowning her heart to find a life raft to anchor herself.
An ugly sob escaped her throat as she tried to bring her hands to her face as everything from the day imploded in on itself. Her whole body was shaking as she sank into the swinging bench behind her, once again alone. No one was there to help her when she needed guidance the most.
She wanted Tyler back already or did she? Why didn't she offer to go with him? Wasn't that what young couples in love did? A creeping feeling was sitting there in the pit of her stomach taunting her. The demon crawled up her throat leaving guilt in its wake, the tiny voice entering her mind and whispering the darkest secrets of her heart.
She didn't want to go with Tyler. Caroline wanted him safe but she couldn't go with him. It was the single most guilty thought eating away at her all day but if she was honest the thought had been there much longer. Sobs wracked her body, gripping the armrest of the bench she squeezed until needle pricks of splinters stabbed the palm of her hand in an attempt to counteract the numbness her heart was trying to fight. Something had changed within her, something in her died.
Klaus' words mulled over in her mind, he had seen more clearly into her heart than anyone had in her entire life today and that thrilled and terrified her. The entire day was a profession of the depth of his emotions for her and they both knew it but Caroline wasn't sure she wanted to feel it yet.
The pride on his face when Caroline clearly recognized what the sword was and the accompanying smirk made her insides soar. Someone had recognized her intellect and didn't question it. Maybe it was vain and definitely ego stroking but she didn't care, it made her work harder on the translation just to see the look on his face again.
Part of her desperately wished Klaus would have granted Tyler life, but the rational part of her brain knew it wasn't going to happen. At least now Tyler had the chance to live somewhere and find someone to be happy with. He could never find that happiness with Caroline and she knew it, the past year had changed them too much and that was why she was sitting on the bench with tears staining her jacket because her childhood had gone with him.
Tyler was everything that was safe about her life, her last chance at the fleeting dream of southern perfection. A dream that ended before it began when Katherine held the pillow over Caroline's face to send a message. Klaus was steadily taking root in her heart and place they both knew at one point he would find permanent residence within.
Today had shown it, Klaus could have spent the whole day watching them struggle to translate the sword and lord it over their heads. Instead he helped them and willingly gave them the reason why he wanted the cure. Certainly he taunted Tyler about the power he held over him but that was a core part of Klaus, the display of power and that would never change.
But the action that capture her heart the most was their honest exchange as she pleaded for Tyler's life. She wondered if the impact of his words were as deeply penetrating as hers had been the night before. His assessment of her character had certainly rocked her. He had seen right through her and asked her the one question that no one bothered to ask and before she could answer, knew her response.
Never had anyone been able to see past her defenses so quickly much like she could she past his. The terrifying feeling was she wanted that, she wanted someone to know her like that and the guilty demon whispered that it knew she wanted that someone to be him.
That was why when he said "It was all for you, Caroline." she couldn't respond to him because it was an awakening to the fact one day she would love him just as much as he loved her. Her deepest fear was abated by his actions; he had put her first above everything today. The future and inevitably her happiness lay with him.
Today had been the demise of her childhood; the world was new and frightening again because the road with Klaus would never be one without turmoil. Caroline sniffed back tears, standing up and tentatively taking steps into the dark night towards her own home. She needed to grieve for the loss of her childhood but in every death new life is born. Her journey to womanhood was born with that one line from Klaus and part of her couldn't wait for that new life to begin.