Remus,

I am not entirely sure why you left so suddenly, but if it was as a result of something I have said or done to offend you, I humbly beg your forgiveness. Please send us news of how you are. It has been several weeks now and I am frightened that you have forgotten us. We all truly miss you here, especially little Jamie, who is now babbling, if not quite saying full words yet. I know he will be crawling soon and I do not wish you to miss it. Sirius is quite lonely without you- if you will not come home for my sake, please consider doing so for his. He is very frustrated with having to remain in the house while the others can travel freely, and I am afraid that he might one day decide to do something rash. You were always the one who could talk sense into him. Harry and the other children are constantly questioning me for news about when you will return, and it breaks my heart to explain that I do not have any idea.

If you will not come home, please at least send us a message so that we know you are well.

With All my Love,

Natalie

Looking over the letter one last time, Natalie rolled it tightly, securing it in the canister that she now tied to Tacari's leg. Carrying him to the open window of the drawing room, she whispered, "Please find him. And make sure he writes back, okay?" The owl gave her an affectionate nip on the nose before spreading his wings. His weight pressed into her shoulder for an instant before he soared out into the late summer afternoon.

Natalie turned back to the writing desk, putting the stopper back in the jar of ink and placing the parchment and quill back inside the top drawer. She paused for a moment, thinking, before pulling a few sheaves of the yellowed parchment back out. She took a new quill from another drawer before closing the lid of the desk, locking it with one of the keys she carried around her neck. Being mistress of a large mansion did have its downside- sometimes she would go through the ring of keys for several minutes before finding the one she needed. She frowned, remembering her husband's request to keep all of the heirlooms and silver locked down for fear that they would disappear into Kreacher's thieving hands. Shaking her head, she pondered the usefulness of a house elf that would rather steal than clean.

She wandered down the hall before knocking on the door of the bedroom that Ginny and Hermione were sharing. Harry and Ron's room was next door, and she heard shuffling and muffled voices behind their door before Hermione emerged from the room. She frowned, looking over Hermione's shoulder at the boys, who were sitting on piles of what looked like textbooks, trying to look nonchalant. She blinked, deciding she would let this one go. Turning to Hermione, she asked, "Do you have some Color-Changing Ink I can borrow? I'd like to play with Jamie for a while." Her son had grown in the past few months, and while still not ready to crawl, he could almost sit up on his own. Wizards, Natalie had discovered, did not have baby toys like Muggles did- she was leery of anything that moved by itself for fear that James could hurt himself. Coloring was a good way to entertain him, as she knew he could distinguish between colors already.

Hermione nodded. "Sure, Natalie." She stepped over Ron to dig in her trunk for a moment. "Got it," she said proudly, bringing it back over to Natalie, who smiled and thanked her.

As the door closed behind her, Natalie wondered what in the world those children could be up to now.

She entered James' nursery to see him lying on his back in his crib, his shock of black hair sticking straight up on the side of his head as he played with his toes. She suppressed a giggle, picking him up and cradling him. Snagging the half-empty bottle from the bottom of the crib, she carried her son down to the kitchen. Sirius was sitting at the table, frowning into the fire, a bottle of butterbeer in his hand. When his wife and son entered the room, however, his face brightened. He stood to his feet and walked over to take James from Natalie's arms, lifting him high above his head and making him squeal from a mixture of fear and delight. "And how is my handsome son today?" he asked, and Natalie stifled a grin at the sound of her husband speaking in a baby voice. He looked over at her, guessing what she was thinking, and leaned in to give her a kiss. "Mummy seems to think I'm crazy," he said to the boy, cradling him in his arms and tickling his toes. "Mummy has no idea," he whispered loudly.

Natalie let out a sound that was half laugh and half scoff. "Give him here, Sirius," she reprimanded. "You're frightening him."

"Nah." Her husband tossed her his handsome, devil-may-care smile that she adored- except when he was dangling her son by his arms. "He loves it, Nat." To prove his point, he swung James in a circle over his head, and the little boy squealed with laughter. Natalie's hand jumped to her throat, and she gave her husband a disapproving frown. He laughed, setting James gently down on the flagstones on his back and ruffling his hair. "All right, all right," he said, backing away and laughing. "Play safely with him, then."

"I certainly will, you reckless fool," she told him, making him bark with laughter again. She pulled Sirius' cloak off of the back of his chair- when would he learn to hang it up in the hallway?- and spread it out on the floor to act as a barrier between the cold stones of the floor and her son's tiny body. She sat down next to him and spread the parchment out, meaning to begin coloring, but James was focused on the glittering gleam of her wedding ring. He snatched at it, his sharp baby fingernails digging into the skin on the back of her hand. "Ouch!" she cried in surprise. "You silly little monster!" She grabbed his toes and began kissing them, making him wave his pudgy arms and coo.

Sirius chuckled from his seat at the table. "Remus did a good job with that," he said conversationally, nodding at her ring. She looked up at him and smiled, seeing that he meant it. She held it out so he could admire it. "He did," she agreed. "Thank you."

Sirius shrugged, giving her an endearing look. "I wish I could have picked it out for you, instead of sending Remus with the gold," he said, his voice taking on a bitter twinge as he handed the ring back. "But at the very least you have one now." He smiled at her teasingly. "Can't have you running off with the likes of Mundungus Fletcher!"

She shivered at the thought of the grungy, smelly toad of a man, slipping the ring back onto her hand. He was part of the Order, although Natalie didn't understand exactly why- he was cowardly, not to mention a brazen thief. She frowned, remembering how she had gone to the cupboard the other day to realize that a handful of goblets were missing- the good silver ones that bore the Black family crest. When she had mentioned it to Sirius, he had shrugged, saying that he didn't care about those kinds of things. She looked down at Jamie, wondering if he would feel the same way when he was older and realized that pieces of his inheritance had disappeared.

Before she could reply, a voice came from the doorway- one that she recognized. "Hello, Padfoot, Natalie."

She turned to see Remus standing there, rucksack in hand, looking entirely worse for wear. His brown hair was now liberally streaked with grey, and his robes looked more patched and faded than before, despite Natalie's best efforts to keep them repaired. The dark circles under his eyes clashed painfully with the paleness of his skin. However, he was smiling, albeit rather timidly.

"Moony!" Sirius stood to his feet and crossed the room, clapping his best friend on the back and smiling happily. "Where have you been? We've missed you! Here, sit down." He gave Remus the chair he had been sitting in and walked into the pantry. Emerging from the dark room, butterbeer in hand, he pulled out the chair beside Remus', straddling it. He slid the bottle across the table to him. "You look a bit peaky, mate," he observed dryly. "You all right?"

Remus nodded, carefully not looking at Natalie. "Long summer," he said grimly.

"Harry will be happy to see you," Sirius told him. "They leave tomorrow, you know."

"I know." Remus nodded. "I got Nat's owl not too long ago and decided it was time to come home." He met her gaze briefly before looking away. "Tacari's upstairs- I handed him to Ginny when I got in the door."

"Thank you," she murmured, but he wouldn't look back at her.

Sirius, with the social skills of a troll, didn't notice. It never failed to surprise Natalie that a man raised in such an aristocratic family could lack such control over his emotions. She supposed Azkaban had an influence.

Remus rubbed his thumb along the sweat dripping off of the cold butterbeer bottle, but didn't drink. "How is everyone?" he asked.

"Fine," Sirius said, studying him. "Jamie's gotten bigger." A note of pride was evident in his voice.

Brown eyes flickered in the direction of the woman and child seated on the floor. "I see," Remus replied. Natalie, having known Remus for several years, noticed immediately that his smile was fake. "You must be very proud, Padfoot."

Sirius frowned. "You're sure you're all right?" he asked, and he sounded concerned. He paused, counting on his fingers. "Full's not for another two weeks."

"Its just stress," Remus answered quickly. "I'm really tired."

Natalie knew Sirius was remembering the way she had insisted she wasn't ill before she realized she was pregnant. He wisely decided to let it go, not wanting to badger his best friend. "All right, then," he said. "Fred and George are in your room, I'm afraid. We're pressed for space with the Weasleys, Ron, and Hermione all here."

Remus only nodded. When he got up and wandered towards the hallway, Sirius caught Natalie's eye and nodded in his direction. He took her place on the floor, folding his long legs beneath him awkwardly and whispering, "Maybe he'll talk to you."

Natalie highly doubted this, but hadn't it been her letter that brought him back? She rose and followed her best friend out into the hall. He turned at the sound of her footsteps, immediately looking around awkwardly. Natalie stopped in front of him, arms crossed. "So this is how it's going to be from now on, Remus?" she asked, her voice carrying a soft warning. When he raised a questioning eyebrow, she frowned. "Do three years of friendship mean nothing to you? Or- God forbid- twenty years of friendship with Sirius?"

Remus flinched slightly at Sirius' name. Natalie noticed, and pounced on it. "We were drunk," she said pointedly. "It meant nothing." When he looked upset, her voice softened. Laying a hand on his arm, she continued, "You don't have to feel guilty about anything. You did nothing wrong."

His brown eyes were troubled. She had never seen him this distraught. "I did do something wrong," he whispered.

"What?" she asked.

Remus gathered her hands into his. "I- Nat, how- I have feelings for you. You must know that."

She frowned. "What?" she repeated. "Are you serious? You've never said anything!"

He chewed on his bottom lip. "What was I supposed to say, Nat? I wasn't honest with myself for a long time- and then when I was- well, you'd already met Sirius. And you two are so perfect for each other…" He trailed off, looking miserable.

Natalie squeezed his hands. "That's why you left," she said, realization dawning on her. "All this time I thought you felt guilty for the kiss. But that's not-"

"That's not it at all," he finished. "I thought it would be best for me to leave for a while. Let you and Sirius spend some time together, without me always being in the way." He tried to smile. "I know you love him, Nat, and I know he loves you. I won't do anything to hurt either one of you." He paused. "I was hoping to kind of, you know, forget those feelings while I was gone, so I could be around you again- like before. But- seeing you now... it didn't do me any good."

"So you're going to hang around here and be miserable," Natalie said. "You know Sirius and I will not let you do that. We're your friends, Remus. We care about you."

This time when he smiled, it was genuine. "You're not angry with me?"

"Why would I be?" she asked, stroking his cheek with her hand. "You can't help it. You've tried to change it. And you know you have to accept things the way they are. You're still my best friend."

He leaned in, as if to kiss her cheek, but thought better of it and opted to kiss her lightly on the forehead. "You're too good to me, Natalie. Both of you."

"I know," she responded cheekily.

He laughed and headed slowly up to his room.

When Natalie reentered the kitchen, Sirius looked up from his spot on the floor curiously. "Everything all right?" he asked, ignoring James, who was holding his index finger with a tiny fist.

Natalie nodded, sinking to her knees to sit beside him. "The trip wore him out, I think," she told him. "He'll be okay after some rest."

Sirius was chewing his tongue, thinking hard. Natalie reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder. He looked over at her and grinned. "Okay, I'll take your word for it," he said. He leaned over and gave her a kiss. "Look what he can do, Nat," he prompted, turning back towards James and waving his finger over the little boy's face. When James lifted his head and followed his father's finger with his eyes, Sirius laughed. "He'll be sitting up soon, I know it." He looked so joyous in that moment that Natalie decided that she had done the right thing by not telling him about Remus' confession. She smiled and watched him play with their son, holding on to the sight for her memories. She stroked Sirius' black hair and leaned into his shoulder. But her mind was racing as she thought about what Remus had finally told her.