A/N: Thanks for all the reviews, alerts, and favorites! Again, sorry for the longer than usual gaps between updates. Summer is coming to an end and life, work, and school are picking up for me again. Thank you for being patient!
A shout-out to the sexy DieZeitVergeht! She is my beta and she is all things adorable ;)
I will properly get my drinking and Shark Week on now lol!
Enjoy...
Chapter 24: We Are Family
Santana found herself experiencing a bout of deja-vu as she sat next to her wife and lawyer in court. However, this time she was feeling a bit more confident than she was at the hearing a few weeks prior. Gone were her cold sweats and jitters, and in place was more of a nervous excitement than anything. Santana and Brittany felt like a couple of kids on Christmas Eve, and they could hardly sleep the night before. It had been a long year building up to this point for the couple and they were ready for the whole thing to be over so they could move on as a family.
Santana was mindlessly staring across the way at the defendant's desk. Valerie and her lawyer hadn't shown up yet. If there was any nervousness coming from the couple it was simply because they didn't know what to expect when coming face to face with the woman they had heard so much about. She had to admit, she was curious about the woman. Santana found herself often trying to picture the face of the woman who had scarred their daughter for life. But, she could never get a clear mental image because all she could ever picture was a monster.
"Are you okay, babe?" Brittany asked and gently grabbed her wife's hand.
"Yeah, I'm fine, Britt." Santana calmly spoke and leaned over for a light kiss. "I'm just really ready to get this over with," she whispered against her lips.
"Me too..." Brittany brought Santana's knuckles to her lips for a reassuring kiss. "Everything is going to be fine though! We just have to trust that Abram is ready and the system will work."
Santana couldn't help but feel more at ease as she looked into Brittany's confident, blue eyes. She stole a glance behind her at Roxie who was sitting in the gallery between Linda and Dr. Levy. Santana weakly smiled as she watched Roxie carry on a conversation with both women.
It was coming up on a year since Roxie had been in their lives and Santana was in reflection mode. They had all come a long way since those tense few weeks of early Fall. Santana wouldn't change a thing though. Those early growing pains had made them a stronger family, and had gotten them to this very point.
Santana's moment of reflection was interrupted as one of the doors to a side conference room was suddenly opened. In walked the young lawyer followed by a handcuffed Valerie Ramos, who was being guided by a court bailiff. The light conversation abruptly stopped as if it had been sucked up by a vacuum. You could hear a pin drop as the woman was led to her seat next to her lawyer. The rattling of her medal handcuffs was the only sound to fill the room as the bailiff removed them.
To Santana's surprise, she didn't look like a monster at all, but rather your typical ex-crack addict. She could see a little of Roxie in her face, but not much. Roxie must have taken after her father more, because the rundown woman she was looking at looked nothing like their beautiful daughter. She wore a forest green prison shirt and looked as though she was allowed to wear makeup for the first time in months; it was caked on unevenly like she had forgotten how to apply it. Santana watched as Valerie obnoxiously rubbed her sore wrists. She looked behind her and gave Roxie a wave coupled with a cocky smirk. And, just like Santana thought, it was taking every ounce of her not to launch herself across the aisle and beat the shit out of her. It was the next moment that Valerie locked her cold, black eyes with Santana. She ran her eyes up and down the couple with such malice and gave them a similar cocky smirk before her lawyer drew her attention away.
Brittany squeezed her wife's hand as the clerk called court to order. It would undoubtedly be a long day, but Santana couldn't wait until that smirk was wiped off the woman's face for good.
"Dr. Levy, is it your expert opinion that Roxie has suffered extreme trauma because of her mother's chronic negligence?" Abram casually paced in front of the witness box as Dr. Levy was nearing the end of her cross examination.
Court had been in session for a couple of hours and Abram had indeed kept his word, and was showing Santana the worth of Family Law. The word 'slam dunk' didn't even begin to do the case justice; it was a complete and utter massacre of Valerie Ramos' defense. Santana was actually starting to feel sorry for the young lawyer, who couldn't muster anything other than a few 'objections' here and there. Frankly, there was nothing for the poor guy to defend. He couldn't argue the facts; Valerie Ramos was a horrible mother and human being. She didn't deserve the right to call herself Roxie's mother.
"There's no doubt in my mind Roxie's trauma has been both directly and indirectly caused by her mother's negligence." The therapist was resolute as she firmly spoke.
Valerie was becoming more agitated as court dragged on. She had listened to hours of the truth, and she couldn't handle it any longer. She couldn't keep herself still, nor could she keep her expressions neutral. It looked as though something was bubbling under the surface and everyone could sense the tension building. It was a matter of time before Valerie let something slip.
"Would you mind telling the court what Roxie has been diagnosed with?" Abram asked.
"Sure. Roxie has been diagnosed with a slew of secondary anxiety disorders. We see them a lot in children who have been abandoned or abused. I also have highlighted some self destructive tendencies and trust issues," Dr. Levy continued and scooted forward in her seat. "But, the main one is Post-traumatic stress disorder."
"Dr. Levy, can you explain PTSD in more detail for us, please?" Abram asked.
"Sure, PTSD is a severe anxiety disorder that can develop after exposure to an event or a series of events that result in psychological trauma. It shows itself when it overwhelms an individual's ability to cope."
Santana and Brittany clasped hands a bit tighter after hearing the PTSD diagnoses again. Dr. Levy first told them about it a few weeks prior and it was still difficult to comprehend.
Santana swallowed and was beginning to think it was a mistake for Roxie to be in the courtroom during this testimony. Her history and personal life were being spoken about like she wasn't even there. Santana looked behind her and found Roxie calmly staring ahead. The girl flashed her a tight but confident smile to let Santana know she was fine. Santana smiled back, again reflecting on how far the girl had come.
"Are you saying that at the age of sixteen, Roxie has been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder we usually see in war vets?" Abram paced some more.
"Yes, that is correct," Dr. Levy confirmed. "More importantly, PTSD is seen in people who have experienced extreme, violent trauma. In the case of Roxie, she has experienced violent physical as well as sexual abuse. And, it often manifests itself in panic attacks and night terrors. Again, directly and indirectly due to her mother's negligence," the therapist reaffirmed.
"That's bullshit!" Valerie blurted out. She pointed and snarled at the doctor as her lawyer tried to calm her down. "You planted that shit in my daughter's head!"
"Ms. Ramos, that's enough!" Judge Connors admonished the woman. "Mr. Stevens, I warned you that your client only had one strike! She's done for the day!"
"Your honor, the petitioners have no further questions or witnesses to call. They rest their case." Abram politely smiled at the judge. The cheeky lawyer had a cocky gleam in his eye as he had gotten what he wanted out of the cross examination. Valerie had finally erupted and shown her true colors.
"Okay, well I think I heard enough. Dr. Levy you may step down," the judge removed his reading glasses and rubbed his brow. "I'm calling a break for lunch, then I want to talk to Roxie in private. I'll be ruling shortly after that," he called the recess and quickly made his way to his judge quarters.
Santana and Brittany let out a relieved breath in unison at the prospect of almost being done with the case. They both turned to meet Roxie who was walking towards them.
"You dykes think you can turn my daughter against me, huh?" Valerie shouted from across the way as the bailiff cuffed her and started to lead her away. "Rox, you're mine, mija! You'll always be mine!"
Santana turned and squinted her eyes. She shook out of her wife's hands and took a step towards the woman. Her whole body burned white hot with anger she hadn't felt in years.
"Tía, no!" Roxie caught Santana's wrist. "She's not worth it, okay...?"
Santana snapped out of her haze of anger and silently nodded back at her daughter. Everyone watched as Valerie was led out of of the courtroom. Roxie felt nothing as she suddenly realized that would probably be the last time she would ever see the woman who had given birth to her.
"What do you think is taking him so long?" Brittany asked and tucked some hair behind her ears.
This time Brittany was the nervous wreck as they all waited for the judge to return with his decision. Roxie had returned from testifying in private with the judge more than twenty minutes ago, and was again sitting quietly between her therapist and social worker. Abram was staring ahead and anxiously drumming his pen against the desk. Valerie wasn't allowed back into Judge Connor's court after her outburst, and her lawyer looked shell shocked as he stared straight ahead. Again, Santana felt a little sorry for the man. Abram had handed the kid his ass on a platter.
"Britt, I'm sure it's fine." Santana gently squeezed her wife's thigh. "He's probably just writing up his official decision for the court records," she reassured.
"Well, he needs to hurry up!" she whispered.
Santana chuckled and leaned in to place a kiss to Brittany's forehead. "Aww, does someone need to look at pictures of Gabriel to calm their nerves?" Santana joked.
"Maybe..." Brittany smirked.
"I thought so. The magic baby makes everything better!" Santana laughed and began to dig in her purse for her cellphone.
Before she could find her phone, Judge Connors quietly entered the room. Everyone did a quick rise as he took his seat. Santana noticed he looked a bit shaken - almost disturbed. She and her wife knew the feeling; a telling of Roxie's childhood experience wasn't for the faint of heart. Santana and Brittany squeezed each other's hands under the table as the judge cleared his throat.
"I uh, normally don't do this..." the old judge apologetically pursed his lips, and the couple suddenly became worried. "But, I feel obligated after hearing what was presented in my courtroom today. On behalf of the system, I would like to personally apologize to Roxie for it failing her repeatedly throughout her short life."
The couple swallowed back tears as they knew how important it was for Roxie to hear the apology. It was essential to her healing process that someone own up for letting her slip through the cracks for so long.
"I'm going to make this quick and to-the-point. I'm ruling in favor of Mrs. and Mrs. Lopez-Pierce. And, I'm ordering Valerie Ramos' name stricken from the birth certificate, and officially opening Roxie up for adoption."
There was a collective sound of muted jubilance as everyone tried to contain their emotions. Brittany already had tears running down her cheeks as she mouthed 'thank you' to the judge. Santana wiped discreet tears of her own, not wanting to fully bawl before the judge finished his statement.
"Now, legally you two can't adopt Roxie for a few more months. But, I want you to know I will personally preside over your adoption when you officially file." The judge flashed a rare smile at the couple.
"Mr. Stevens, may god have mercy on your client's soul for what she personally did and allowed to happen to this child. Legally she is entitled to an appeal, but I hope you save her the embarrassment. I wish the Lopez-Pierces the best of luck! Court is dismissed!" Judge Connors banged his gavel and again swiftly got up from his seat, scurrying off to his side room.
In a millisecond it was one giant hug-fest among everyone. Roxie was being engulfed by Linda and Dr. Levy. Brittany was going between Santana and Abram as she squealed, kissed, and hugged them both. By the time Roxie made it over to her parents, she too was crying tears of joy. The three of them were sharing a group hug and Santana couldn't care less about the fact she didn't get to see Valerie Ramos' face as the judge ruled against her. It wasn't about the woman, and it would never be about her again. Roxie's was theirs - she had been theirs all along. The signing of the adoption papers in a few months would simply be icing on the cake.
"Britt, why is your son giving me that look?" Kurt cocked his head confused as he held Gabriel in front of his face. The three month old infant stared back at Kurt fussy and with crinkled brows.
Brittany looked up from her dinner and leaned over to get a better look at her baby. "Oh, that's his 'about to spit up' face."
"Oh my god, here! Take him, take him... somebody take him!" Kurt quickly passed the baby off to his boyfriend. "This is a three hundred dollar Stella McCartney poet blouse!"
"Oh, is that what the technical name is? I just thought you were dressed like a gay pirate for dinner," a buzzed Santana teased and took a drink of her gin & tonic.
"Is the baby going to be passed over here anytime soon?" Quinn added from across the table.
"Nuh-uh, Q! Gaby comes to me first, then you!" Mercedes corrected. "We're going clockwise!" she gestured with her hand.
"You two need to get your own babies! Seriously, Nick and Teo need to get working on that!" Santana laughed as she watched the blood drain from the men's faces. Nick even looked a bit queasy at the suggestion.
It was celebration time for the family later that evening after court let out. Brittany wasted no time after the decision in calling and making dinner plans with all their friends. They decided on Monk's, their favorite jazz bar to gather everyone. Marcus had even hooked them up with their own private dinner party in the VIP room. Everyone except Brittany were two cocktails away from getting on the private stage for a round of karaoke or a sing-a-long.
Random conversation carried on for awhile longer and Santana watched everyone with a content, buzzed smile as she leaned back in her chair with her drink. The sounds of a drunk version of 'People' from Funny Girl filled the room as an amused Marcus played piano for Kurt. She watched as her wife rocked Gabriel to sleep while discussing the nuances of breastfeeding to a creepily interested Jonathan. She listened as Quinn and Mercedes bounced future baby names off each other much to the chagrin of Nick and Teo. She couldn't help but grin as she watched Roxie and Zoe lovingly whisper into each other's ears and giggle. Santana was brought back to reality by the clapping as Kurt finished his song.
"Thank you!" Kurt curtsied. "As much as I want to stand up here all night singing Barbara; I think it's time Santana bless us with some Amy Winehouse!"
"Yeah!" Everyone said in unison and clapped. Roxie whistled and started a chant to encourage Santana.
"Nope... no way!" Santana laughed and waved everyone off, breaking up the chant. "I'm not nearly drunk enough for that!"
"Oh honey, come on!" Brittany pleaded. She placed a sleeping Gabriel in his car carrier on an open chair next to her.
"Well, if you're not gonna sing, I will!" Mercedes stood up. "Come on, Quinn! A version of 'Ebony and Ivory' has our name on it!" Quinn nodded and held up one finger for Mercedes to wait as she downed her cranberry-vodka.
"Tía, you are such a chicken!" Roxie laughed.
"Oh, says the girl who doesn't sing in public either!" Santana pushed her daughter's shoulder.
"Actually, that's not true anymore," Zoe smirked. "She sang for me at Musician Square a couple of weeks ago!"
"So, you sing for your girlfriend but not your parents?" Santana teasingly squinted her eyes. Roxie laughed and shrugged.
"I'm also trying to get her to audition for BHSA!" Zoe took a sip of Roxie's soda.
Brittany sucked in an excited gasp. "Oh my god, yes! Rox, you should totally do it!"
"I-I don't know, Auntie B." Roxie shook her head.
"Last auditions are at the end of this month! Sweetie, you have to do it!" Brittany begged.
"I think the singing a few weeks ago was a one time thing. I don't think I could go through with an actual audition."
"Oh, who's back to being a bigger wimp now?" Santana teased, quirking an eyebrow.
Roxie squinted her eyes and folded her arms at the challenge. "Fine! If you sing right here and now, then I'll audition for BHSA in a few weeks!"
There was an awkward moment as Santana stared at a smirking Roxie and considered her daughter's challenge. She slowly smiled and stood up, "You have a deal!"
As Mercedes and Quinn wrapped up an inspiring version of the 80's classic, Santana walked on the small stage. "Alright, Paul and Stevie, get off the stage!" she shooed them off.
"I'm up here because the gauntlet has been thrown down," Santana drunkenly announced. "So, you get your Amy!" she looked back and nodded at Marcus.
"Yes!" Kurt shouted. "Back to Black!"
"You Know I'm No Good!" Mercedes requested.
"Valerie!" Brittany yelled.
"My sexy wife trumps all of you idiots; Valerie it is!" Santana lovingly blew a kiss and winked at her wife as Marcus started a stripped down piano version of the Amy Winehouse classic.
Well, sometimes I go out by myself
And I look across the water
And I think of all the things, what you're doing
And in my head I paint a picture
Roxie's eyes bulged out as she listened to Santana sing the first verse of one of her favorite songs. She had only heard Santana's voice when she would lightly sing Gabriel to sleep. But, she had never heard her fullout sing and had no idea she could sing like this.
Did you have to go to jail,
Put your house on up for sale, did you get a good lawyer?
I hope you didn't catch a tan,
I hope you'll find the right man who'll fix it for ya
Are you shopping anywhere,
Changed the color of your hair, are you busy?
And did you have to pay that fine
That you were dodging all the time, are you still busy?
Roxie smiled as she watched Brittany glow with pride while watching her wife sing. She looked at all the friends who shared Brittany's enthusiasm, like they were being served an old treat.
Since I've come on home,
Well my body's been a mess
And I've missed your ginger hair
And the way you like to dress
Won't you come on over
Stop making a fool out of me
Why don't you come on over Valerie?
Why don't you come over Valerie?
Santana ended the song to the whistles and hollers of her wife and best friends. She blushed, but quickly recovered as she confidently bowed.
"Thank you! And, now my daughter will join me on stage for a rendition of Sister Sledge's 'We Are Family'!" Santana teased and waved Roxie on stage.
"NO WAY!" Roxie turned red and started laughing. "That has to be one of the worst songs of all time!"
"Speak for yourself! 'We Are Family' is my jam!" Mercedes defended the late 70's dance classic.
An extremely buzzed Mercedes, Quinn, and Kurt all stumbled their way on stage to join Santana in the sing-a-long. The inebriated foursome started loud and off key. Marcus was having a hard time keeping time as he played piano and died of laughter at the same time.
We are family
I got all my sisters with me
We are family
Get up everybody and sing...
"Oh my god, I can't take the secondhand embarrassment!" Roxie lamented and Zoe laughed at her girlfriend. "Auntie B, can we please go?"
Brittany laughed and nodded. "Yes, you guys can go. Even though your Auntie is being too adorable right now!" Brittany looked back up at her friends and grinned.
"Uh, that is not adorable, B!" Roxie looked disgusted as she and Zoe got up from their seats. "That is disturbing!"
Brittany rolled her eyes and chuckled. "Just be home before curfew."
"I will!" Roxie said as she was being led by the hand.
"Oh, and Rox...?" Brittany stopped the girls before they left the table and Roxie swung back around.
"Yeah?"
"I love you!" Brittany sweetly smiled.
"I love you guys too!" Roxie slowly grinned because she could never get used to hearing those words and saying them back.
Brittany watched as the two teenagers made their way out of the room. She then checked on a sleeping Gabriel and was now convinced he could literally sleep through anything. Brittany contently sighed and leaned back in her seat as she watched her wife and Kurt fight over who would take the next verse to one of the worst songs in history.
"I can't believe my Tía can sing like that!" Roxie was still amazed as she racked up the pool balls. The two teenagers were in Zoe's game room later that night.
"Looks like you both were holding back." Zoe smirked and flirtatiously grazed passed her girlfriend. Roxie laughed at Zoe trying to be sexy as she bent over the pool table and horribly shanked her shot.
"Z, you suck at pool!" Roxie laughed.
"I know!" Zoe whined. "That's why I wanted to play Mario Kart..." she pouted.
"Fine, we can play Mario Kart," Roxie gave in. She quickly kissed Zoe's pout away and grabbed her stick.
"Are you really gonna audition for my school?" Zoe asked and leaned against the pool table, watching Roxie hang up the pool sticks.
"Yeah, why?" Roxie turned and walked back. "You think I'm gonna chicken out?" she smiled.
"Nooo..." Zoe gently slid her arms around Roxie's waist, pulling her closer. "I just don't want it to feel like I'm forcing you or something," she gently spoke and searched her eyes.
"You're not forcing me," Roxie slid her arms around Zoe's neck. "I want to do this, okay?"
"Okay..." Zoe whispered into a kiss, then hugged her tight. "I just want you to be happy, Rox..." Zoe mumbled into her neck.
Roxie broke the embrace and cupped Zoe's face in her hands, looking deep into her eyes. "Zoe, I am happy. For the first time ever in my life..." Roxie let the words hang in the air as the two held each other.
Zoe leaned in for a deep kiss and Roxie was caught off guard by its intensity. Zoe's tongue searched and probed as she backed Roxie across the room. They moaned into each other's mouths as they fell onto the black, leather loveseat. Zoe never broke the kiss as she slowly straddled Roxie. The kissing was heated and sloppy - almost dizzying. Roxie couldn't catch her breath and before anything could really register, Zoe snatched off her own shirt and throwing it behind her.
"Oh shit..." Roxie quickly flickered her eyes back and forth between Zoe's chest and face. Her breathing was shaky and uneven as she couldn't escape the fact that the only thing standing in the way of her and Zoe's boobs was a satin, lavender bra.
Zoe didn't let up as she sucked on Roxie's neck. She worked her mouth up until she was hotly breathing into Roxie's ear. "You're so sexy, Roxie. I want you so bad..." she took her girlfriend's earlobe between her teeth and pulled.
Roxie felt an unfamiliar throb between her legs. Sure, she had sex before, but she had never been with anyone who made her body feel like this.
"Zoe..." is all Roxie could breathe out as the throbbing turned to a painful ache. Her hands were firmly planted on her girlfriends ass. Zoe was catapulting them to the next step and Roxie wasn't sure if she was ready yet. She was helpless in the moment as everything felt like quicksand - slowmotion.
Zoe moved her mouth back to Roxie's full lips and swallowed her shaky moans. They alternated sucking on each other's top and bottom lips, only breathing when it was absolutely necessary.
"Do I make you hot...?" Zoe whispered against Roxie's lips.
And, it was official; Roxie was super turned on as the tightening in her lower stomach was becoming unbearable.
"U-uh... ah..." Roxie breathed out inaudible sounds and swallowed, attempting to moisten her dry throat. She rubbed her hands up and down Zoe's back before awkwardly snapping them back down to her ass.
Zoe chuckled into a kiss. She loved Roxie's adorable stuttering and how generally awkward her girlfriend could be. She thought it was the hottest thing in the world. She kept kissing and slowly moved her hand between them until she reached the hem of Roxie's t-shirt. She slightly pulled it up and popped the top button of Roxie's jean shorts.
Roxie's sensitive lower stomach twitched as she felt Zoe's fingers inch into the waistband of her panties. The sirens in her head went off all at once as she realized what was about to happen.
"No! Zo, stop..." Roxie gently gripped Zoe's wrist, stopping her from pushing her hand fully into her underwear. "Can we just stop for a second?" Roxie was careful to keep her voice calm, not wanting Zoe to think she did something wrong.
"I'm sorry, Rox!" An embarrassed Zoe slid off her girlfriend and onto the cushion next to her. "I-I just thought maybe you wanted..." Zoe tried to explain herself, reaching down to search for her shirt on the ground.
"Zoe, you didn't do anything wrong." Roxie quickly turned her body fully around so she was facing Zoe on the couch. She grabbed her hands and forced Zoe to lock eyes with her. "Z, I really... really want to!" Again, Roxie couldn't take her eyes away from her girlfriend's boobs.
"You do?" Zoe seemed relieved and scooted closer to Roxie.
"Yeah, I do. But, I-I don't think I'm ready for that yet," Roxie was almost apologetic as she searched Zoe's face. "All the times I've had sex haven't meant anything. I want it to mean something this time. I want it to be special."
Zoe contemplated Roxie's statement as she looked down at their hands. "I lost my virginity to a girl from my dance school last summer in Moscow..." Zoe shook some bangs out of her face as she looked up. "It didn't mean anything either. Rox, I want it to be special too," she admitted.
Roxie lunged forward and grabbed Zoe's face, capturing her lips in a hard kiss. "So, you're okay with waiting for me?" Roxie rocked her forehead against her girlfriend's.
"Of course, I'll wait for you..." Zoe placed a gentle kiss to her lips. "I love you, remember?"
"I love you too..." Roxie smiled into a kiss and leaned into a deeper hug. "But, you have to put your shirt back on before we get our Mario Kart on, Z!" Roxie mischievously smiled.
Zoe laughed and looked down at herself as she had forgotten this whole conversation was taken place while she was topless.
"Your boobs are super distracting and I would lose every race!" Roxie laughed and literally couldn't stop staring at Zoe's chest.
Zoe clicked her tongue, rolling her eyes as she pulled her shirt back over her head. "I should keep it off! Maybe it'll offset your Mario Kart cheater ways!" she smirked.
She kissed Roxie one last time before hopping off the couch to set up the video game.
Roxie contently smiled as she watched Zoe from the couch. She was glad they had the talk before things went too far. In all honesty, Roxie still had a ways to go with her therapy with Dr. Levy before she was ready for that next step with Zoe. Roxie's face dropped for a second and her anxiety ticked up a level as she realized that she actually knew nothing about sex with girls.
Santana sat on her couch a few days later with her laptop in her lap and feet casually up on the coffee table. She was getting some work done as it was getting backed up the more she neglected it. Spending more time in the studio meant she had less time to actually get paperwork done at the office. So far, it wasn't much of a problem as long as she finished it at home. She relished in the quietness for a moment. Brittany was getting an after dinner jog in and Gabriel was was sleeping soundly in his crib. Santana double checked the baby monitor and smiled as she heard the soft, rhythmic breathing of her baby boy.
As Santana worked, Roxie awkwardly walked into the living room and stood by the couch. Santana looked up at her daughter over the top of her reading glasses and waited for her to speak. Roxie walked out without a word just as awkwardly as she had come in. Santana scrunched her brows and shook her head confused. She went back to her typing, brushing off the strange encounter.
A second later, she was interrupted again as Roxie walked back in. This time, she stopped herself before she made it all the way to the couch and quickly tried to walk back out.
"Stop! Get back here!" Santana ordered and Roxie winced as she was caught. She turned around with a pained expression as she slowly made her way to the sofa.
"Out with it! What is it and how much is it gonna cost?" Santana didn't bother looking up from her laptop screen as she continued typing.
"Uh, i-it's not something I need, Tía..." Roxie tentatively took a seat at the end of the couch. "I mean, it's something I need but not like something material..."
"Rox, spit it out!" Santana giggled, shaking her head.
"I wanted to talk..." Roxie nervously folded her arms.
"Okay, well your Auntie B will be home from her run in a few." Again, Santana didn't look up as she typed.
"I actually w-wanted to talk to you." Roxie nibbled on her bottom lip.
Santana looked up from her laptop confused at her daughter. She knew the face she was giving Roxie and quickly corrected it. Roxie had that look like she wanted to talk about something personal and Roxie-Santana didn't do personal. Most of their talks consisted of reality show gossip, music, school, and the occasional talk about how her and Zoe were doing. And, usually every conversation was topped off with a nice quip to bring things full circle. It was Brittany who had the more interpersonal relationship with the girl and that's what was making this moment so confusing for Santana.
"O-okay, sweetheart." Santana placed her laptop on the coffee table and tossed her glasses on top. "What is it? It's not something bad, right?"
"No... at least I don't think so," Roxie rubbed her thumb ring. "I mean, I guess it can be bad... you might think it's bad. But, I don't think it's bad-"
"Roxie!" Santana cut her rambling off. She threw her hands up as to tell her daughter, out with it!
"Okay, me and Zoe almost had sex a few days ago!" Roxie blurted.
Santana's eyes bulged as she felt the blood drain from her face. She just had this very talk with Brittany a few weeks prior on what she would do if Roxie ever asked her about sex.
Her worst nightmare was becoming her reality.
"Don't you want to wait for B?" Santana asked with a pained expression. "She's better at stuff like this, mija!"
"No, she'll be too touchy-feely and emotional about it," Roxie whined. "I just need someone to give me the cold-hard-facts."
Santana cocked her head confused. "Okay, but you just said you and Zoe almost had sex. Which means you didn't go through with it? I'm confused, what do you want to know, Rox?"
"We didn't go through with it. I-I'm not ready for that yet. But, eventually... I want to." Roxie spoke quietly and looked down embarrassed.
"Okay, I'm still confused on what you're asking me here, honey!" Santana nervously chuckled.
"Tía, I don't wanna look stupid..." Roxie started to explain herself and Santana was still trying to follow her daughter's train of thought. "You know, when it actually comes to... it?"
Santana was squinting her eyes and her mouth was agape as she eventually figured out what Roxie was asking her. "Oh... oh! You mean, you wanna know how...?"
"Oh man, you have major freak out face right now, Tía!"
"No, I'm good, Rox!" Santana lied as she tried to quickly pull herself together. She thought maybe she could stall long enough for Brittany to make an entrance.
"Okay, um... there are websites and things you can read online," Santana's mind was drawing a blank. This was all too much for her handle and she had no formal training on how to conduct a sex talk with a teenager.
"Are you saying I should watch porn?" Roxie scrunched her face at the horrible advice.
"Maybe... I don't know! Does that sound like good advice?" Santana flashed a dopey half smile at the girl.
"Ugh, I'll just wait for Auntie B!" A frustrated Roxie moved to get up from the couch.
"Wait! Rox, sit down." Santana ran her fingers through her hair. "I'm sorry, can I just have a do-over?" Roxie reluctantly nodded and took a seat.
Santana calmed herself and tried to soak in the gravity of the situation. She thought long and hard about her next few comments before she opened her mouth.
"Let me ask you, sweetheart. Do you love Zoe?"
"Yes!" Roxie smiled.
"Does Zoe love you?"
"Yeah..." Roxie nodded as her smile widened.
"Then I promise you, mija... you won't look stupid." Santana reached over to gently grab Roxie's hand.
"It'll come naturally to you, Rox." Santana reassured. "When you love someone everything just falls into place. And, whether both of you know what you're doing or only one; it'll work out, okay?" Santana reached up to smooth out some of Roxie's chestnut locks.
"W-was that how it was for you and Auntie B?" Roxie softly asked.
"Yeah, sure..." Santana began to explain. "It was something new, strange, and a little scary for us. But, in the end... it all worked out because we loved each other. We trusted each other, Rox. You and Zoe just have to trust each other, okay?"
"Okay..." Roxie nodded and seemed satisfied with Santana's advice. "Uh, thanks, Tia..."
"You're welcome..." Santana smiled back at her daughter and was proud of the fact she just pulled off a rather tasteful sex talk with a teenager.
"Who knew you could be just as emotional and sappy as Auntie B," Roxie teased as she got up from the couch.
Santana laughed and pulled her laptop back into her lap. "Oh, Rox...?" Santana caught the teenager before she made it fully out the living room. "When you watch your lesbian porn tonight, don't forget to put your headphones in. No one needs to hear that shit, mija!"
Roxie squinted her eyes in disgust and grumbled under her breath as she trotted off to her room. Santana smirked and put her reading glasses back on. She couldn't help taking the shot. It wouldn't be a typical Santana-Roxie conversation if there wasn't a lighthearted jab to end the discussion. After All, it was the dance they did.
"Baby, please tell me you did not tell her to watch porn?" Brittany chuckled and scooted closer on the pillow she was sharing with her wife on the bed. The two were having their nightly pillow talk before bed later that night.
"I didn't, Britt!" Santana laughed. "It all came out horribly wrong, babe. I was trying to say there are tasteful websites that can give her... you know?" Santana was having a hard time finishing the statement.
"Some pointers?" Brittany grinned and was seemingly amused at her wife still having the willies after her and Roxie's sex talk.
"Yes... ugh," Santana sighed. "Britt, it was horrible! You should have seen me, I was freaked out the whole time! I still can't think about Roxie doing that! And, now every time I see Zoe I'm going to be weirded out!"
Brittany giggled and scooted even closer to give her wife a calming Eskimo kiss. "Stop it! You're overreacting; I'm sure you did fine!"
"How do you know?" Santana whined and reached up to mindlessly rub Brittany's earlobe with her thumb.
"Because, I've seen how you are with every other big talk we've had with her." Brittany played with a lock of Santana's hair as she spoke. "Baby, you're really good with her. You should have more confidence. I told you that before!"
Santana smiled and couldn't help leaning forward for a gentle kiss. "So, you're not mad she came to me?"
"No..." Brittany readjusted herself on the pillow again. "Because, I know there's things she'll only come to me for," she smiled. "That's what parenting is all about; a balance. It evens out in the end. We're a family now, San! Things aren't always gonna be perfect, but we can promise to do the best we can."
Santana searched Brittany's face for a second as she sometimes had to take a moment to really appreciate her wife. She still couldn't believe how lucky she was to have her. And, every time Brittany spoke such honest words, Santana swore she would fall in love all over again.
"You're such a genius, Britt-Britt!" Santana chuckled into a kiss.
"I'm so happy, San..." Brittany cradled Santana's face as they broke the kiss. "It just feel like everything is complete now. Like, we have our perfect family."
"Mmhm..." Santana leaned in for a harder kiss, rolling her wife over. "You know what else is perfect, honey?" Santana said, trailing kisses up Brittany's neck.
"Huh...?" Brittany giggled.
"That your boobs aren't off limits anymore!" Santana grinned down at Brittany's chest and suggestively flickered her eyebrows. "Can the girls come out to play...?" Santana tickled her way up Brittany's tank top to cup a boob.
Brittany threw her head back in laughter as her wife tickled her way up and bunched her tank top up over her chest. "How are you this horny all the time, baby?"
"I don't know, but it might have something to with having my hot, sexy wife around all the time!" Santana murmured into sloppy kisses under Brittany's ear.
Brittany giggled some more, then wrapped her legs around her wife's ass. Santana responded by dipping her head lower to gently take in the flesh around Brittany's nipple in her mouth. She hummed, kissed, and sucked around the sensitive part. Brittany's boobs weren't off limits anymore, but there were still restricted zones. Santana wasn't complaining though, she would take what she was given.
"I fucking missed you guys..." Santana whispered and grinned into Brittany's chest.
"Mm, that feels so good, baby..." Brittany arched her back and ran her fingers through Santana's hair as she gave each boob equal attention.
Santana looped her thumbs into Brittany's panties and began to slowly pull down when the familiar sound of a distraught Gabriel came blasting through the baby monitor and from down the hall.
A defeated Santana collapsed on top of her wife. "Ugh... perfect timing as always," Santana mumbled into Brittany's neck.
Brittany laughed and rolled Santana off her. "He probably just needs to be changed," she hopped off the bed, pulling her tank top back down and readjusting her panties. She then quickly made her way to the nursery.
A few minutes later, Brittany returned to the bedroom with Gabriel. "Look who's wide awake and said he wanted to snuggle with mommy & mama?"
"Aww, come here, mijo!" Santana cooed and sat up to make a little space for their baby.
Brittany walked over and gently laid their son in the middle of the bed. Gabriel was wide awake as he sucked on his binky in his cotton, sleep shirt and diaper. He looked between his mothers for a second, then seemed more interested in grabbing at his toes.
Santana and Brittany were both propped up on an elbow as they kissed, cooed, and took turns snuggling Gabriel. They watched as his eyes became heavy and eventually closed. They both yawned, seemingly eager to join their son in a peaceful sleep. Santana reached over and turned off the last lamp. She found her wife's hand in the dark on Gabriel's little tummy and interlaced their fingers. They snuggled in closer to their son and both breathed in that addicting lavender, baby smell.
Spurred by the monotonous sucking sound of Gabriel's binky and the sounds of Brooklyn coming in through the partially opened window; Santana and Brittany followed their son into a slumber.
End Not: Is it weird that I wish Gabriel was real and that he was mine lol? Also, I keep wondering when this angst will kick in ;)
As usual, any questions or comments? Shoot me a PM or hit me up on tumblr (martianinthought)