Guys, I'm so sorry that this is late! I have insanely busy Mondays, so I might have to start updating on Tuesdays, instead. Also, this chapter is super short because I have 2 tests, 1 essay and 3 chapters due Friday. Ugh. And I did over 5 hours of French study yesterday and ended up dreaming in French. Woah.
So, Kuroko no Basuke is over. I kinda died a little. And that latest Free! episode? It killed me.
Alfred stared though the darkness at the ceiling of his bedroom. He'd been sent to bed without dinner as a punishment for getting into a fight. Again. With the same person. Honestly, his aunt and uncle probably only punished him because Ivan had been suspended. Otherwise, they didn't seem too displeased.
So now Alfred found himself staring at the ceiling and trying to ignore the grumbling in his stomach and the echoes of words in his head.
"What would Matthew say?"
Alfred's eyes stung. Where had Ivan heard about Matthew? What right did he have to mention him?
"At least I don't lie to myself."
Alfred clenched his fists. Ivan was right. Alfred lied to himself. He always had. Even when he was just a kid, he'd filled his head with ideas of heroism. Dad hadn't helped much, always encouraging his heroics; giving him advice. And it turns out he was the worst of all.
"Everyone will leave you. No one cares if you live or die."
Who had said those cruel, cruel words? And to whom? Didn't that person know how deeply words could cut? Didn't he know that careless words could ruin lives?
Alfred closed his eyes. And he remembered.
It wasn't the least bit odd for Alfred to find himself rooting around in the hood of a car when he had things on his mind. He's worked at Uncle Freddy's mechanic shop for years, now. The man had taught him so much about machines and willingly offered material to practice on. The old mechanic was extremely knowledgable in his field, but the thing Alfred loved most about Uncle Freddy was the non-mechanic related advice he gave.
Alfred dropped his wrench for the tenth time. His mind was clouded in anger, and he couldn't focus. How dare he? How dare Carlos touch his brother? After all those times Mattie had tried to help him!
Alfred felt a warm hand on his back. "You won't be able to do anything if you can't see past your anger." The gentle voice was full of understanding. Alfred sighed in frustration as he turned to face his mentor.
Uncle Freddy's kindly eyes crinkled up as he smiled at Alfred. "Why don't you tell me what happened?" The older man sat on the hood of a car, and Alfred followed suit.
"I'm really mad." Alfred glowered. Uncle Freddy just nodded solemnly. One thing Alfred loved about the old mechanic was that he was never patronizing. He treated everything Alfred said to him as if it was just as important as something an influential and powerful man could say. Alfred knew he could come to his older friend for advice and never be turned away.
"I'm mad because Mattie got really hurt. He was trying to be friendly to Carlos, you know him? And Carlos beat him up. Mattie told mom and dad that he got hurt during hockey and it was no big deal, but I got him to talk. I went to Carlos and-" The child paused, and the continued, slightly quieter "-I said some pretty bad stuff to him. I was just so mad, ya know? And I feel a little bad now, but it's not like he didn't deserve it, after what he done! I just-" He sighed from the bottom of his soul "-I just feel bad."
The kindly man stroked his white beard and glanced at the child gazing up at him as if held all the answers in the universe.
"Alfred," he finally began, "this is a very difficult situation. Your brother was hurt, so you were justly angry. Anyone would be in your situation, and you did the right thing by defending him. But," the child who had been nodding emphatically glanced up in confusion, "words can hurt. Things we never meant to say, or perhaps said in the moment but regretted later, can have lasting effects. Careless words can cost lives.
The old man removed a thick gold chain from his neck and placed it in the boy's hand. A six pointed star winked up at him.
"This is the proof of my mistake. Because I was foolish and let cruel words fly, I lost all that I held dear. Never once have I believed I deserved for it to return to me. I can only pray that it is not too late for you."
Uncle Freddy ruffled the child's tow colored locks. He lifted the necklace and placed it around Alfred's neck. "For safe keeping," he explained. Alfred was so young. He had his whole life ahead to make mistakes. The mechanic hoped that the words of a child would not be taken to heart. He didn't deserve that curse hanging over him for his whole life.
And yet, he knew how unjust life was.
"Well, now." The light tone signaled the end of the discussion. "I do believe we have a car to fix."
Alfred blinked at the ceiling. He lifted the Star of David from where it rested on his chest. It was one of his most treasured possessions. Uncle Freddy had given it to him for safekeeping. But Alfred knew there was more to it than that. He had seen the way the man looked at it; the pain in his eyes, the regret in his voice. He knew it wasn't a positive memento. Rather, it was a shackle. Perhaps his friend's bones were too weary to bear the burden any longer.
Still, he knew the meaning behind the gesture. Uncle Freddy was passing on his knowledge. The man had once failed. So badly, in fact, that it ruined his life. Alfred failed, too. He had acted the part of the villain, despite his deepest wishes. And he was doing it again. What did he know? Did Ivan have the right to tarnish Mattie's memory? No. No way. But did Alfred have the right to judge him? No. Ivan was like Carlos all those years ago. Hated; feared; only surrounded by those who couldn't stand up to him. Alfred wouldn't make the same mistake twice.
In that moment, the star resting on his chest felt just a little lighter.
Thanks so much for your wonderful support! Though it makes me feel guilty for not being able to give you long chapters, but, what can you do?
So, here's the lowdown of my college experience so far.
I love all the people. The teachers can be intimidating and are rather proud of the fact that they won't hesitate to flunk you if you don't try hard enough. I thought I would be the only otaku here, but I'm not! I wear my anime shirts around campus and I get so many, "I love that show"s or "I need that shirt!" It's awesome. I always believe in throwing yourself on the line for what you love, and if some people think I'm weird for only wearing anime shirts, there will be others who agree with me, even if they are so outward! I've also found trekkies and MARVEL geeks galore!
Here's a brief descrip of my teachers, cuz they're real characters!
Philosophy- He has a bushy white beard and talks so softly and gently. Exactly how I would imagine one of the Greek philosophers!
Psychology- A complete nutcase. He wears denim suits and wacky print shirts. He's very casual and relaxed and has the hair and beard of a younger Colonel Sanders.
French- Short, French lady with a funny sense of humor, though very tough! She somehow believes that all Americans hate French people and think they're rude.
Western Heritage- Southern gentleman who has a typical drawl and comes to class in pink pants and bowties. Super nice and great sense of humor!
Choir- Thinks he's funnier than he is. Very passionate about music and very talented.
Theatre- Typical hippie theatre lady. Don't know her that well yet.
Anyway, I love all my teachers, though the classes are hard. I'm loving college so far! How is your guys' schooling going?