CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
There are moments in your life that will happen and you will stand there and watch the moment and know that you will always remember it. Every last detail, all drawn up in your head. Details that aren't even important, and yet they get implanted into your moment.
The water fountain in the center of the atrium and the noise that the drops made as they hit the pond beneath. The reporter who wore this strange tartan jacket, which I prayed he only did to set him apart from the rest of his peers. The silence that had come over the building while the world outside remained crude as ever.
But this wasn't my moment. However, I knew in that second that I would never forget this moment as the time stood still while Edward Cullen began to gather his courage to find his words; I knew that this was Edward's moment.
"I have something to say…" He started off a tad shaky as he drew another breath in, but Michael was already to the microphone.
"You are not welcome here. I think you've said quite enough."
"No…no…he can stay and say whatever it is he wants to say." I put a hand on my brother's arm and gave him a determined look. I didn't know if Edward had come here to divulge even more of my secrets and bad behaviors, but I still wanted to hear it no matter how bad it was.
"You may continue, Mr. Cullen."
I had hoped I didn't sound as sad and pathetic as I sounded in my own head. Ah hell, I had hoped that he would say at least one kind thing, as I don't believe I could handle hearing anything less from him.
Edward stepped forward a little more and the reporters gave him a wide berth wanting to pull back and ensure a great shot for their news factions.
"I met this girl a couple months back and she was unlike anything or anyone I had ever met." He began, and it was clear that he had worked to pick each word with such care.
"…At first I thought she was like so many girls I had known. I believed Isabella Swan to be an entitled rich little brat but…she just…isn't. She thought I was homeless…she met me and came to work at a soup kitchen with me. She braved the unknown streets of skid row because she was worried for me, and then she took me in. She brought a homeless man into her home when the weather outside was stormy, and she fed me and gave me clothes and was kind to me. This is the real Isabella Swan. The Isabella Swan I wrote about was a lie…I wrote The Ugly Duckling article because I wanted to hurt her….damage her because I was jealous and angry."
He turned to me, "Bella…I didn't want to see you with Jacob Black. You are so much better than Jacob Black, and you deserved more than what he could ever offer you. I'm sorry for how I hurt you and in the most pathetic moment of my life, I wanted to hurt you the way I felt you had hurt me by leaving with him, because the truth is that…I love you. I have loved you for nearly every moment I have spent with you. I was scared to tell you who I really was because I didn't want you kicking me out of your life. I know I can never make up for what I did…how I treated you…what I said…but I am sincerely sorry for how I hurt you."
He stopped, taking another breath, but I don't believe I had taken one since his first word. I saw him turn slightly to the press corps and begin once more.
"I lied…I have compromised my integrity as a reporter and I can no longer, in good conscience, continue on with the Los Angeles Times knowing what I have done. I have embarrassed my family and my apologies to them for all the ways I have hurt them with my actions. And I want to apologize to my peers because I know I have hurt the reputation of our profession, but Isabella Swan…is not the girl I painted in my article, she in no ugly duckling and does not deserve your harsh criticism. I'm the one at fault here….not her."
He finished and the only sound I could make out was the clicking from the photographer's cameras. Everyone had turned their attention back to me and was waiting to hear my response. I had felt the sting of a thousand nerves at the beginning of my appearance, but now I couldn't feel a thing. How much time had passed since Edward's last words? Not much, I imagine, since no one had prompted me.
It was an odd feeling, like I had heard each and every word, but all together couldn't grasp what he had said. Angry. Sorry. Love?
He walked forward toward the podium and held something up in his hand. Cautiously, I looked around before moving to take whatever he was giving me, but before he would let go of the small object in his hand he said softly, "You can do whatever it is you want to do in life, don't allow silly game rules to limit you. No one can tell you what you can or cannot do, except yourself."
He let go and the small plastic car from my Life game fell into my fingers. I looked down at the car and felt the weightlessness from the toy roll around in my hand. I straightened up and stood before the microphone with no prepared statement but the one that was going to come from my heart.
Somehow, Edward's moment had pushed me into mine.
"Mr. Cullen…wrote an article about me which I'm sure you've all had the chance to read by now…and everything he said in it…is true." I took a breath and swallowed while I heard a couple of murmurs from the crowd.
"My father, Charles Swan, never expected much from me. Even though I worked hard to try to do something positive with my life, I wanted him to be proud of me but…by not having his support after high school I became the Isabella Swan that Mr. Cullen wrote about. However even though Charles Swan never expected much out of me, I should have expected more from myself. I was an arrogant, rich, entitled brat who spent my days shopping and spending time with girls just like me. I would see a homeless person and not even think of them as a human being. I really did believe I was better than them. But Mr. Cullen's article was wrong about one thing, he said I hadn't changed, but that's not true. Edward Cullen forced me to open my eyes to reality and I can no longer be ignorant in the truths of our world and so, I know you have all come here today is to hear what my intentions are for Swan Enterprises but before I explain, I want everyone to know that I have given a great deal of thought to my decision. I have had the opportunity the past couple of months to learn what the ultimate definition of humanity means. I have learned what the definition of family and friends mean. I have been honored to now embrace my journey and know that there are great expectations of me and that I can make a difference. My grandfather was a great man. He managed to create this company out of nothing and I can't, in good conscience, see all his hard work sold off to the highest bidder. I want to honor him and his sacrifice for years to come and I know that the person who is capable to take Swan Enterprises into the next generation is Michael Swan. Financial investments have never interested me so it would be wrong for me to take over a company which business holds no importance to me. However, I want to see this company do great things. Not just make people money, which I know we're good at, but we should help out our fellow-man so I am making it my duty to ensure that a great percentage of profits go to guaranteeing that the less fortunate benefit from our success, because people should never be thought of as just another tax write-off. We should give contributions with our hearts and not for our gain. I don't want Swan Enterprises to just send money because it looks good to our clients and investors. And because most of all, people deserve a second chance and that is what Edward Cullen taught me, that I too can have a second chance to be a good person."
I took another breath and finally looked over toward my…Charles Swan. I could see his mighty hand in a fist, probably trying to keep him from doing or saying anything publically. Our eyes met and he had that look that I had seen many times over the years. A look that meant trouble. I turned back to the crowd for one final remark.
"My grandfather…was one of the best people I will ever know. He…saw something in me that no one else did. He had faith that I would do the right thing even when I was a horrible human being. In these past few months, he has given the best wisdom a person could ever ask for. He was a good man…but he failed. He knew that he failed my father and he failed my brother and I. He worked so hard to make Swan Enterprises what it is today that he wasn't the father he should have been to my father. He wished that he had spent his time more wisely and that is what he wanted me to learn."
I turned to look back at my father one last time, "Charles Swan…my father…you have given your life to Swan Enterprises. You have missed birthdays and recitals and nearly every single important event in Michael's and my life but I know why you did all that. You wanted to be successful and to give us a father to be proud of so…because of all your hard work in this company, I can think of nothing better than to honor you with an early retirement. I will make sure that you have all the funds you need to do whatever it is you wish with the remainder of your life. You can go shopping or buy a new car…don't worry daddy, I will take good care of you…just as you have taken care of me."
I had hoped that didn't sound as snide as I had intended it to be. I plastered on an endearing look so hopefully I hadn't taken two steps back for Swan Enterprises. I turned back to the crowd and didn't see anyone look appalled so I must have won this round.
"On behalf of Swan Enterprise I would like to thank everyone for their avid interest in our company and would like to wish you all a good day."
There was an eruption of questioning the moment I stepped back, but thankfully they didn't seem as scandalous as when I first entered the building. Mr. Cheney took over and continued our sentiments and Michael and I were whisked off toward the elevators with a pack of security. I tried to look back one last time for Edward to see his face, even once more, before we parted to never seeing one another again but he was already gone. The small plastic car in my fingers was all I had left from our time together.
I sighed and the elevator doors closed.
I imagined that we were heading up to the head offices and it was a funny feeling, as I had never stepped foot in this building before today, to finally see what all the commotion was for this company.
"Sorry to drop the bomb on you like that…I know you said you didn't want to become dad and I really hope you won't, Michael." I started.
"I hope not either."
"I really want to see this company stay in Swan hands…just not Charles Swan hands. I want you to have a better future then both of your predecessors. I really want you to be happy…if you don't want the company…"
"Bella." Michael turned to stop me. I waited for him to continue, but instead he gave me a small smile and then pulled me into a hug. I was honestly taken aback since we were never the hugging type of people.
"I will hire someone to help…a good right hand man to make sure that I never have too much work and that I don't become Charles Swan. I still get to do what I love and know that I can have a bright future for myself…my future wife and future kids."
"Kids…wow…I can't even imagine being an aunt. I'm sure I would probably fuck that up." I cringed just picturing it.
"I don't think it would be as bad as you're picturing, for starters you could always work on limiting the crass language."
I gave him an offended look and he laughed. He started to say something more, but then stopped and started again and then stopped again.
"Just say whatever it is you are dying to say." I huffed.
"Love…are you…in love with him too?"
I turned and stared back toward the elevators doors, trying to will them open.
"Of course not…I can't…he…I could never trust him and I…there is just not enough understanding on the planet to even try to comprehend love for a person who in one sorry jealous, man-child moment screwed me over in every way possible."
"He did give a good speech…I must say."
I gave him a warring look.
"Yours was good too." He added quickly.
"I just want to forget about Edward Cullen…good speech…dammit, it was a good speech." I huffed annoyed.
"So…do you still want me to pursue the lawsuit?" Michael suppressed a grin.
I exhaled frustrated. "I guess…not…I mean he did just quit his job…publically. I doubt we could do worse."
"Well, that is the…noble thing to do." Michael stated with a sense of mockery in his voice.
"Yes, we are being…noble." I crossed my arms over my chest, not wanting to look at his smug face.
"Yes. We are…just a couple of noble kids in charge of a billion dollar company…forgetting all about Edward Cullen…doing the right thing has nothing to do with any of our underlying feelings for the man…no feelings whatsoever here, right?" Michael stated rather playfully, irritating me even more.
"No. No feelings. Not a one." I replied adamantly.
"Good…good to know."
The doors began to open just as I was about to respond when we were interrupted.
"You bitch!"
A security guard immediately took defense, pushing me behind him.
"Father!" Michael exclaimed.
Another guard took a hold of Charles and pushed him out of the way of the elevator so we could exit.
"You think you can force me out of here? I will never leave Swan Enterprises. This is my company!" he began to rant.
I looked at Michael concerned and he looked back at me. I could see the state that Charles Swan was in. He was sweaty and, for the first time in my life, he didn't look so scary and threatening. He looked pathetic.
The guards were still holding him back as I lightly moved the guard standing in front of me aside.
"There will be an account set up for you. I will make good on my word and ensure that you are monetarily taken care of. It's over Charles…you are no longer a father to me and I'm sure that you will find great comfort in that until comes the day where you are sitting in a chair, all alone and reflecting back on your life, wondering where it all went wrong." I looked toward the two men holding him. "Could you please show Mr. Swan to his car."
"I will fight you. I will slaughter you and take this company back! Michael, you will do as I say, son." He struggled hard but was no match up for the men as they pushed him onto the elevator and the doors closed on that chapter in my life too.
"Was that what you had pictured?" I asked Michael, still staring at the elevator doors.
"Yeah…but now that I think of it, I should have wanted something more…dramatic. Like being thrown out in front of all that press…that would have definitely made for a better ending." He jested.
"I'll be sure to remember that when I write the screenplay."
"So…what is next for Isabella Swan?" he asked.
I sighed, "I would have thought that life would have gotten even a smidge easier after deciding what I wanted to do with this company but…I don't feel any weight off my shoulders. Even with Edward coming clean on the reasoning of his article, I don't feel any better than before."
"Well didn't you want to go to school? I'm sure you could literally go anywhere you wanted now?"
"I do. I do want to go to school. I think school would be a nice distraction from this feeling."
"And what about Swan Enterprises…whole new contribution efforts you announced? Are you going to be taking care of that?" Michael asked.
"No…not for now. I want to focus on school, but I want someone in that position who I know I can trust to always do the right thing so that the money goes to the right places. I have someone in mind…someone who could use a job upgrade."
"Well you should probably decide on where you want to go to school before you buy a new home…in case you wanted to go out of state."
Yale.
Oxford.
Ivy League was at my fingertips and yet, it didn't sound like the right fit for me anymore. However, Michael was right, I did need to decide soon so I could buy property in a respective place. I spent the next few days looking over different curriculums at various schools, but in the end I decided that Ivy league and out of the country was just not for me after all.
The spring semester would be starting soon and I could easily still apply…maybe having to use some connections however. I wanted to start back to school taking it a little easy since I had been out of school for a few years and needed to readjust back into that academic lifestyle.
By December I had made up my mind and enrolled at UCLA. In the end there was something about Los Angeles that made me want to stay. With being enrolled, I finally managed to find a place before Christmas to call home. A one story, two bedroom property with a beautiful majestic garden, and everything felt like it was finally falling into place…except one thing.
For the first couple of weeks after the press conference I had begun to throw myself into looking on toward the next phase of my life. Searching out schools and possible homes was what got me through not focusing on any residual feelings of resentment, hurt, and betrayal. Of course grandfather's words would creep up every once in a while, however I was getting rather good at finding distractions wherever I could.
At first it was what school to attend. My next distraction was finding a house to live in. Then, I went out in a moment of insanity and adopted a cat who was mighty fluffy so, of course, I had to name him, Fluff 'n Fold. Just one step closer to my hopeful future as a cat woman, I figured. Which brought me to my current distraction; moving.
Once more, the moving van had unloaded the boxes from my old house, which had been temporarily moved to Michael's house, and finally found a spot in my new living room. Box after box, surely this would be a tremendous distraction.
But as the night grew darker and I was once again alone with Fluff 'n Fold, I finally couldn't stop the voices and memories floating around in my head. I missed having friends. I missed having someone to talk to.
I sat down in the one chair that was empty and looked over at my television, which still needed to be installed. With no mindless entertainment, the voices I had been trying to shut out just got louder and louder.
You have the ability to give one of the greatest things that a person can give to another human being. The gift of forgiveness…you will never be happy until you can be free from the pain and the only way that will ever happen is if you suck all the poison out and forgive. Forgiveness...is...divine and one the best things we can give to another person."
I missed…Alice.
And just thinking that made me pissed off all over again, but I couldn't deny that I missed her. I missed Emmett and Jasper, but at least I hadn't gone insane enough to miss Rosalie, so that was a positive.
I wondered what they would be doing tonight? Were they all working at the kitchen? Out having fun? Saturday night was surely a long soup kitchen night. Was Edward there? Still grilling burgers in the back since he truly had no job to go to now?
I will admit that what pushed my car over to Horizons that night was that I told myself that I needed to come here for one purpose only. I needed to find the person who would head up the new contributions department at Swan Enterprises, ensuring that our donations were wisely spent.
It was near closing time when I arrived. I walked toward the entrance with great trepidation, wondering if I really should be here. I was even more nervous than the first time I ever stepped foot at this address. It took me a sold five minutes just to get within ten feet of the door.
What was I doing here?
Get back in your car, Bella. Get back in your car.
My feet were frozen to the sidewalk as my body kept turning toward and away from the Horizon's building. I finally placed my hand on the door handle and just right then someone pushed their way out of it.
I stiffened, afraid that I had just been caught in the act. The person I had come to see was now face to face with me. And it wasn't Alice.
AN: Thank you to everyone who responded to my last question from the previous chapter. I will try and please as many people as I can however I know now that you can't make everyone happy. I hope you liked the chapter as i found it difficult to write.
Thank you once again to my fantastic beta,Robstenvampgirl for all her hard work and dedication.
Thank you for reading and reviewing!