Chapter 24
I have read reports of the five pilots. Well, they used to number five. According to SEELE's new information, there are only two available. As for the three who no longer fight the Angels, one currently lies in a hospital bed in a foreign land. The poor girl became quite injured when she stopped Third Impact. Too bad she wasn't in the Eva birthed from Lilith. I would have done the same. The time was not right. Another one, the former lead pilot, became too corrupted from Arael. I hope she is coping. It will be an enlightening experience to speak with someone like her. The final pilot was taken off the roster for "personal reasons". Oh, but I think being Lilith qualifies as more than a personal reason.
Of the remaining two pilots, one is absent from NERV whereabouts, but that always seems to be the case. Perhaps section two no longer tries to watch her. That leaves the world resting in one boy's hands yet again.
NERV now has a dilemma. They have two pilots and three Evas. The Lilin need a third pilot. They need a Fifth Child. I would love to speak with Shinji Ikari. Destiny? Yes, that sounds right to me.
"Rei, what are you talking about?"
The boy's voice carries fear and emotion. He needs comfort, yet the two women in the room do not provide any. He is distressed because of me. I should alleviate his pain.
"There were two before me, thus I am the third." Rei does not know how she knows this. It is a part of her unconscious sentience. She does not have to consciously breathe, digest sustenance, or pump blood throughout her flesh. In the same manner, the Angel knows that she is third among a soul named Rei.
"Shinji, what is she talking about?" The woman's voice sounds confused, more than the boy known as Shinji. Perhaps she knows less than him.
"Misato." The redhead has a weight in her tone than seems beyond what her age should give. "This's above your security clearance. Pilots only."
"What!" The woman, apparently Misato, displays a great deal of emotion. Anger? That is anger. "I am your commanding officer and cleared to much more than you are. What the hell is going on?"
Shinji turns around. She does not see his glare, but Rei could almost feel the gaze. "This is between Asuka, Rei, and I. Please, give us some time." The other female's name is Asuka.
Her shoulders drop in resignation. "Alright." Misato steps out of the room with an expression on her face. Pained. The woman feels pain. If I am wounded to have these bandages, then why am I not feeling pain?
Rei raises her hand. "Excuse me, but should wounds be painful?"
Asuka nods.
"Then, I am not wounded."
She takes off the bandages on her arm with ease. Shinji rushes to stop her, but he is too slow. Her skin appears pristine underneath the white dressings.
"My hypothesis is correct. Could you enlighten me to what happened?"
Asuka waits for Shinji to say something, but when he doesn't she clears her throat. "We fought an Angel. You self-destructed to save Shinji. Long story short, Tokyo-3 is gone. Almost all civilians have been evacuated, the ones that lived. Third Impact almost happened. Oh, Hikari is injured and Shinji was unconscious for two days. Now, you're alive for no apparent reason, but you've got scheisse for memories."
"Oh."
She looks at her hand. It opens and closes without her conscious thought. Why?
"Did I know you?"
Shinji burst into tears. Rei looks away, not knowing what to do. She feels a hand on her shoulders, a warm hand. She turns her head and sees the deep blue eye of Asuka.
"Rei, you're my friend." Her voice sounds calm and collected. She points to Shinji. "You're his twin."
The girl tilts her head. "Am I adopted? I think I am European. I even recall some languages. Sprichst du Deutsch?"
"Ja." She shakes her head, as if she did not wish to switch into German. "Do you know if this room has cameras?"
"There are no cameras or listening devices." She rubs her temple. "I do not know where that information came from."
Shinji wipes away a few of his tears. "Rei, do you remember anything specifically?"
"Blue."
"Like your hair?" asks Asuka.
"My hair is blue? Why did I color it?"
"No Wondergirl, it's actually blue."
"Oh." I do not recall Europeans having natural blue hair. Perhaps it is uncommon?
As Shinji unwraps the bandages around her head, also apparently for decoration instead of covering wounds, he asks, "What do you remember about the color blue?"
"Morning Glories are blue."
Her eyes open wide and she sits up in bed. My flower! She throws off the covers. For some reason, she wears her schoolgirl uniform. Who dressed me? Do I even go to school?
"Where are you going?" Asuka seems worried.
"I need to reach my room."
Shinji beams in happiness. "You remember your room. Do you know where your room is?"
"Yes."
Rei runs out the door, but she neglects to realize no one accompanies her.
Shinji and Asuka exit the door to follow the running girl, but a strong hand grasps each of their arms. Asuka turns around and sees the bottle blonde.
"We're with Rei." She tries to squirm out of her grasp. She stops when the grasp becomes tighter. "Scheisse! Stop that!"
"No!" Ritsuko's tone made Asuka tense. That was a tone never used before by the doctor, normally the most level-headed person in the room. "While Gendo has been depressed as hell from all of this and Kozo has been lying out of his ass to SEELE ever since Shinji tried to murder the world due to a temper tantrum." Shinji cringes. "I was the one who kept Rei alive. I was the one who has been for years. I was the one who deemed you two worthy of not being locked under armed guard due to Angel contamination and destroying Tokyo-3 respectively."
"Rits?" Only now does Asuka register the fact that Misato is standing right next to them. This can't get any worse.
"And you!" The blonde points at her oldest friend. "How the fuck haven't you pieced together all this shit yet? You're supped to be our tactical genius? Ha! Six teenagers and your three superior officers, well I'm your equal I guess, Major." She shrugs. "Anyway! Two of those teenagers live under your roof, and you've never wondered if there was something a little fishy about Rei?"
"Please don't." Shinji stares at the ground. His hands tremble. Asuka takes hold of his hand. At least I can do this one thing correctly.
"Too late for that. You don't know everything either. That was my burden to bare until now. All of you, come with me."
No one dared to challenge her. Despite the waves of fear drowning the girl, Asuka knows that she has no more options. We were a merry group of kids long enough. We aren't kids anymore. It's now time to face consequences… consequences for Rei still being alive after she died… twice already. What have they been doing to her?
They travel down the endless labyrinth of NERV's HQ. They go deeper and deeper. Unlike Rei, Asuka hasn't memorized the entire layout, but she has a pretty good idea where they're going. It makes each step harder to take. Basements are where people with secrets store the bodies. They're going to NERV's basement, Terminal Dogma.
Ritsuko opens the door with the swipe of a key. They step inside a coffin. What? Asuka shakes her head. It's an elevator, an old one. Its design is old like the ones she's seen for those made before Second Impact. How old is this place? Did they build everything new on top of an old installation?
They stop by a door. No one says the words, but Asuka reads the sign. Artificial Evolution Laboratory. Under the words and kanji, lies SEELE's symbol. SEELE was here before us, or is NERV a branch SEELE?
They walk inside the room. Computers are in stacks. They were state of the art for the early 90s. A thick layer of dust and grime covers the walls, floor, and tables. She sees pills that look startingly like the ones Rei takes.
"This looks like Rei's room, before we fixed it." Shinji's eyes… Mien Gott, Angels didn't disturb him this much.
"We like keeping things the way we remember them." She shrugs. "It's a human trait…" Human? What are you inferring? "This was Rei's room after we… retrieved her from Unit 00 the first time until she became… accustomed enough to have her own place."
"This place?"
"Think of it as a small hospital for those who are very sick."
"Will she have to come back here again?"
Ritsuko cringes. "I said this place is for the very sick, not the dying or dead." WHAT? She walks out the door. "Come."
They follow.
"Asuka," whispers Misato. "The first time?"
She keeps her voice quiet but doesn't stop the ice from coming through. "This isn't the first time Rei came back from the dead, Major."
Ritsuko shows them a graveyard of Evas. Somehow, that doesn't scare Asuka. We pilot living things. Living things can die, like Unit 03. The numbers… They aren't the designation for which one was built first. They're just the ones that survived.
"Come."
They follow her to another room. Black smothers everything but a tube of LCL under what looks like a giant brain. Asuka can almost feel Rei's imprint on it. She can't explain how or why, but she knows this is where had disappeared so often.
"It's time for all of you to know the truth." Ritsuko takes a remote sitting beside the tube. She presses a button.
"REI!" Shinji screams are hardly heard by Asuka. The girl's eyes are transfixed one the dozens of lifeless bodies, nude bodies, Rei's bodies. Like fish in an aquarium, they float in their LCL.
As one, each body turns its head to Shinji. They open their eyes and smile.
Ritsuko's voice cuts through her thoughts with a calm, cold indifference. "Souls don't die. Bodies do. Gendo couldn't stand losing his daughter, so we built spares. It's a good thing too since the second one, as you well know, died too."
Shinji falls to his knees.
"When we found Adam and Lilith, man did what man does. We tried to make it ours, but man can't subjugate gods. It blew up in our face… or… Adam blew up in Antarctica. Still, we tried to control god and, in our quest, we fashioned our gods from the flesh of Adam… and one from Lilith. That became our Evas, weapons of war and messiahs from Adam's children. But, why stop at subjugating god? Why not make god one of us, a human god, a human messiah?"
Ritsuko kneels in front of Shinji. Asuka knows she should push the woman away from him. She hurt him too much already, but she can't. The faces. All of Rei's faces. She never smiled like this. They smile like little girls… like dolls. You left me for a doll, Mama.
"Shinji, a human body must have a soul, a whole soul. Rei's soul was ripped in two, so we had only one choice to keep her alive. To save Rei, we… integrated her soul with the one soul who matched it, since Lilith's soul matches all. If you thought Rei was different, she is. We are Lilith's Angels. We can become one with her, so Rei's soul became one with Lilith. Fully Angel; fully human."
She holds up her remote.
"Close your eyes, Shinji. Asuka, take him out of here."
Misato finally speaks. "What are you-"
"What makes us human is that only we are ourselves. I'm going to make Rei's humanity human again. I'm gifting her with the full life my mother took from her."
Asuka tries to lead Shinji out, but he sprints away. She tries to follow him, but she can't. The girl leans against a wall and cries.
I can't. I can't! I'm not good enough. I'm not good enough for anything. I can't be a friend. I can't be a love. I can't be a commander. I can't be there for him.
Rei, forgive me.
Countless bodies of Rei float in the LCL. The red of blood mixes with the orange. The bodies crumble, dismantle.
Asuka cries.
Rei slams her apartment's door behind her. She rushes to her plant, almost cradling it in her arms. This is mine. It is precious. Why? The flower has the deepest blue in its petals. She likes it.
"Rei?" I… I know that voice… from somewhere. It is a good voice.
"Yes?" She turns around.
The girl in the wheelchair appears worried. "I haven't seen you in so long. I was scared."
Why is this girl in my apartment? Why do I know her? What is her name?
"I am not well."
She wheels closer to Rei. "Why? You sick?"
"In a manner of speaking, yes."
The girl reaches out her hand. Does she want the plant? A handshake?
"I… I do not rememb-" She gasps. Her hand feels warm, like the sun. The girl holds Rei's pale hand in her diminutive one.
"It's okay. You can work through it. You can do anything, Rei." Total trust. Unrelenting devotion. What have I done to deserve this when I do not remember your name, young girl? How can I… Oh.
"Sakura."
She smiles. "Yeah. I'm unforgettable, you know?"
"Can you help me? I… hurt other by not remembering. I do not wish to inflict more harm."
"Sure!"
"An unfamiliar ceiling." Hikari's head feels loopy, off. Pain killers. It's as if her body is half-asleep, but it aches anyway.
"Hi."
She rolls her head to the left. A familiar face stares back. "Hey, Ke…"
"Don't bother speaking. Doctors are on their way."
"You?" She wobblily points at him.
"Why am I here? Well, Mari contacted a friend who's been over here. I think you know him. Anyway, he got me transferred to a room close to you. I guess NERV deemed me interesting enough to come out here. Other than you, it's mostly family members of important NERV people, like technicians. Did you know Maya had a brother? Anyway, I sorta snuck out to see you."
The doors open. Without a word, Kensuke limps away before the doctors could yell at him. Limps? Only now does she realize how his arm has a bandage wrapped around it and how he uses a crutch to walk.
The doctors speak to her. She nods or shakes her head in response. It's hard to tell what they say to her. Their accents sound thick, familiar but thick. Asuka had a much better grasp on Japanese than her countrymen here.
Asuka… Her breathing accelerates. "What happened… in battle?" she croaks.
"Classified. NERV says you performed admirably and are retired due to injuries."
"Injuries?"
"We had no choice."
He points to the lower half of the bed. The bumps, or the lack of bumps in this case, cause her to tense.
"Where's my leg?"
"We are sorry."
They say more words to her, but they carry no meaning, no weight. She cries and crying makes her hurt more, so she cries more. Where's Daddy? Where's Kodoma and Nozomi? Where am I? Germany? I'm a cripple! I'm half a human.
Eventually, sleep overtakes her. She doesn't want to sleep. Dreams have become a horrifying thought. They will all be about losing her left leg. She knows it. Instead, she falls asleep due to her medication. It's not a natural sleep. It's synthetic.
A sharp prick in the arm wakes her up. Her vision swirls, but somehow her head feels clear. Drugged after being drugged? It's dark, really dark. This is not some checkup.
"We'll have a few minutes before it wears off." The man pockets the shot. You're…
"Kaji?"
He smirks. "Yeah, I'm alive. Since no one would've told you anything, you'll need to know a few things. Do nothing. Say nothing. Men will soon ask you for reports. Claim an inability to remember that battle. Cry. Do whatever, just don't say anything."
"Kaji?"
"Your sisters and father are alive, but they're listed as dead. It's safer for them that way. Would've done it for Kensuke, but the boy got injured and ended up here too. Tokyo-3 is gone. You did your part. Just stay alive, okay kid?"
"Kaji…"
"This is a great hospital. You're in the German base Asuka used to be at. Isn't that neat? Asuka had two eyes back then…" He shakes his head. "Oh, I'm dead. Let's keep it that way. Kensuke was smart. For once, he rushed to his designated hiding place and stayed there. It kept him alive. Heroes die. Wise people live. Don't be a hero, Hikari. You already are. Trust in your friends."
"Asuka was so sad."
"I still am."
In mere seconds, he's out of the room. She's alone and soon sleep overtakes her again. She dreamt of thirty different nightmares where her leg got torn off.
"You're early." Mari crosses her arms. She should be unhappy. The entire base will be cross with her. She's their only functional Eva pilot. Poor Princess is depressed. Rei is off the roster and spent every moment afterwards talking to a female version of Tiny Tim. Hikari is out. Literately. She's freakin' gone. NERV Germany? Well, Kensuke's over there too. Shinji… He's missing. Has been for quite some time. Hours? Days? No one tells her things. Of course, she knows exactly where he'll be. Why? Well, she knows because who's standing in front of her.
She shakes her head. She's their only functional pilot and went AWOL. They're gonna be pissed, but NERV always feels pissed.
"Ah, I am early because he is early." Of course, you'd say that. Screw you.
"You think I don't know? I take strolls along the beach of a submerged city for the hell of it? Some things won't change no matter the circumstance."
"This is technically an inlet. The submerged city's beach is over there." He points in the right direction.
"I know that! You know that! It was a joke."
"Your humor lacks humor."
"I blame Mom and Dad."
He laughs, a real one. "I don't recall them being the cheeriest of Lilin."
"Yeah Sparkles, they weren't."
"Sparkles?"
"I gave Blue a nick, why not you?"
"True."
Kaworu sighs. For once, his ever-present grin becomes more like a grimace. "I desire your opinion. Would you consider this world better because of our efforts?"
Mari sits down in the dirt. Even the dirt feels different from what it used to be, yet it feels like the dirt of her childhood.
"I'm not sure. Toji's dead. Hikari's worse-off. Asuka… Well, I haven't heard anything about her slitting her wrists yet."
"But, she has an eyepatch."
Mari smiles. "You think that'll stop her during SEELE's big New Year's party?"
His smile returns. "I suppose you are correct. She executes unparalleled displays of piloting."
"Wish I was there to see it."
"You will be if fate permits."
"Sparkles, we don't do fate."
His eyes move from her to the distance.
"Shinji's approaching, isn't he?"
"True."
Mari kicks the Angel in the groin. He grunts and collapses to his knees. "That's for what you've done, especially to Dad."
He manages to say, "I will not disagree."
She slaps him, hard. "That's for what you will do."
"I agree. Two against one will be harder." He rubs his cheek. "But, the payoff will be worthwhile. Maybe she'll make it this time."
"Does that even matter?"
He stands up. Already, the handprint has disappeared. To bad Rei couldn't do that. Stupid Angel powers.
"You have your mother's drive, Ky-"
"Don't." She holds up her hands. "It's Mari."
"And Lilin believe Illustrious and Makinami are real as well? I suppose trust is one of your kinds most valuable yet exploitable traits."
"True. You have your part. I have mine. Don't fuck it up, Sparkles."
"What I did once I can do again."
Kaworu smiles; Mari smiles. She departs; he stays.
The skies above possess splashes of orange and red hues. The lake is colored like LCL. Not a sound of life emanates from the abandoned, destroyed city. It's just the lapping of waves and the blowing of the wind. This used to have millions of people. Now, it acts like a giant tomb. The stench of the dead fills his nostrils.
I abandoned them. His stomach grumbles. Rei, were you ever my Rei? I… There were so many of you. What will I do when we meet again? Hug you, run from you, scream? I don't know. He stops walking when the water reaches his ankles. I just don't know.
He hears a voice. I know that melody. Turning his head, he sees another boy sitting on a rock. He stares into the sunset, not bothering to blink. He hums Ode to Joy. Funny. I don't see any reason to be joyful, not anymore.
"Singing enriches the soul, does it not?" His voice sounds melodic even when he doesn't hum. "I view music as the crowning achievement of Lilin's culture. Your words can hurt, but your voices can uplift even the lowest of souls. Don't you feel the same?" He turns to look at the Third Child. His eyes are red; his skin is pale. Like Rei. His hair is a greyish white. "Shinji Ikari."
"You know my name?" He clenches his fist.
"Of course. I have been observing your progress for quite some time now."
"Who are you?"
"Oh, pardon me. I have yet to introduce myself. I'm Kaworu Nagisa, and I shall be your new teammate, the sixth to pilot but the Fifth Child."
"Why haven't you arrived before?"
"Higher powers decided I should be the last of us to arrive."
"Oh…"
He hops of the rock and splashes knee-deep into the lake. He wades out. "You have a sister, do you not?"
Shinji can't stop himself from cringing. "Yeah?"
"Could you take me to her? If the pilots are to be a team, we should get to know each other."
"B-but…"
"Come." He smiles. "I look forward to this."
The Fifth Child stops walking away when the he doesn't hear a trailing set of footsteps.
"Is something wrong?"
"It's just that… I thought I… but she was so… And death. So much. Did I… I don't think I ever knew her."
He turns around. His smile emanates warmth. "Shinji Ikari, you cannot truly know anyone. There is always more to learn, but you can decide if you love someone. Do you love your sister?"
"Yes."
"Then let us depart. You truly do not know how much you are being blessed with having a sister. No matter how much heartache it causes, you still have her. Cherish your time with Rei while it lasts. You never know when it will end."
Kaworu walks away again. This time, Shinji follows.
Rei eats in the cafeteria. Sometimes, she wonders how much she remembers subconsciously. She took a meal without meat. Rei didn't eat meat. Was it coincidence?
"See? I only just told you, so you didn't know. But, you took the vegetarian food anyway!" Sakura takes another bite of her chicken. Does she eat meat to remind her of the boy named Toji? She said her brother enjoyed meat.
"Perhaps you are correct… Where is Captain Sohryu? I would have expected her to attempt another conversation with me."
"You mean Asuka?"
"Yes, Asuka."
"Rei, I don't think anyone is doing alright. I saw Mari last night, and she didn't say a joke! Nothing. She slunk into her room and closed the door."
"Mari has the room across from ours, correct?"
"Yeah, and when you were sleeping, I saw her. I hadn't seen her for days before that, but I don't think the guards knew she was it there."
"Oh."
Sakura smiles and points across the room. Rei looks. She sees Shinji and another boy. The other boy has his hand around Shinji's wrists as if he drags her… her brother towards them.
"Hi, Shinji!" Sakura waives.
Her brother does not say anything. Instead, he breathes heavily and clenches his hand into a fist and back into an open palm. A nervous tick that we share, apparently. She looks down at her clenching hand.
"Greeting Rei Ayanami and Sakura Suzuhara. I am Kaworu Nagisa. Excuse our hair. We were told to complete a sync test, and I did not wish to delay our meeting further by washing our hair clean of the LCL. May I take a seat?"
"Yes." He looks similar to me.
Nagisa sits next to Sakura. Shinji sits next to his sister, but he scoots away from her. The apparent Fifth Child smiles. Why does he smile so much?
"The technicians were surprised by my readings. I was disappointed. I was hoping to sync well with all three, but one gave me the most unexpected trouble. Fortunately, I convinced another to work with me while the last one was impassive."
"Unit 01 can be difficult to operate."
"You remember?" Shinji's voice sounds excited.
"Not effectively. Ever since I saw you, my information has been coming from the MAGI and Sakura, though I seemed to have retained subconscious memories."
Rei looks at Shinji. My brother appears uncertain about me. How do I alleviate that?
Kaworu chuckles. "Actually, I found Unit 01 to be quite-"
"Shinji." Her words even surprise herself. "I am still Rei."
He looks at her for a moment. Then, his lips slowly rise into a smile. He leans closer to her, then hugs her. "I'm sorry." His voice comes out like a whisper. "I'm so sorry. I failed you, everyone. I'm sorry."
"Can you stay with me?"
"Yeah."
Sakura leans over to Kaworu and whispers, "Are they crying?"
"Yes. I expected this to take longer. Do you desire ice cream?"
"What?"
"Ice cream. I never had any, and I think this moment calls for celebration through consuming sweet sustenance."
"Ok."
They talked and ate through lunch hour. They talked through the afternoon. After the sun set, they talked until Sakura's eyelids became heavy. Shinji left with Rei and Sakura. Kaworu convinced him to stay with them overnight. After the three of them left, the Fifth Child stood alone in the cafeteria.
"Enjoy your time while it lasts. I suppose you'll soon learn what I had to learn." He closes his eyes for a moment. "Sometimes, you let someone go because you love them."
He walks away. His footsteps echo throughout the lonely halls.
"Wark."
Misato told her to watch Pen Pen, so Asuka watches the bird. He tilts his head, wondering where she's carrying him to, especially in the middle of the night.
"Sorry buddy. All the adults are trying to figure out what's up with the new kid."
"Wark."
"Well, we're going to find out. That's what."
"Wark."
"No, Rei's fine."
"Wark?"
"She's with Sakura. It's where she's been ever since… And what could I do anyway? I'm just the one-eyed piece of shit that can't do anything right. I messed it up with Shinji, and now he's gone. I won't do that to Rei either."
He nuzzles at the can tucked under her arm, finally cuing her into what he's been asking for.
"Oh, that. Sorry."
She opens up the sardine can. She sets him down to let him nibble away at the fish. She arrived anyway.
"Hi."
She looks at the behemoth towering above her. The Eva doesn't move. They never move on their own unless the Angels are about to win. Self-awareness?
"It's been a while, too long. Isn't that funny? I was doing well for a long time. Then, I defeated an Angel single-handedly. Hurray. Who cares? I lost my piloting. Because of that, Rei sorta died, Hikari got shipped off the Germany, and the entire damn city exploded. No one says how many died. Hundreds, thousands, millions? I could've saved them. I was the best pilot after all."
"Wark."
She doesn't bother turning around. "I don't have any more fish, Pen Pen." She shakes her head. "You let others pilot you. The others Evas let him. But you… why not Kaworu?"
"Wark."
"Pen Pen…" She turns around to address the bird, but he's not staring at the fish. He stares at Kaworu. The Fifth Child closes the door behind him, not bothering to wait for it to close itself.
"I could not help but overhear part of that, and I was wondering the same thing."
Asuka doesn't move as he approaches. She analyzed him like she would an enemy. He's unknown. Unknowns aren't good.
"She is quite the beauty, isn't she?" He stops and leans on the railing. Pen Pen waddles up to the boy. He bends over and pets the penguin.
"What are you doing here?"
"I'm doing what Doctor Ritsuko, Lieutenant Ibuki, Major Katsuragi, and you are doing. The doctor is not in jail, is she?"
"No? But, she's going sorta crazy and depressed."
"That is still better than prison for a woman of her talents."
She feels painfully exposed. No one knows she's here, but this mystery stands mere meters away from her.
"I have reunited Shinji with Rei. He is having a sleepover. I imagine he took the floor next to her bed."
"Kaworu, people don't happen to have perfect sync percentages. Even mine wobbles a percent or two every second. You had a boring line."
"Except with this Evangelion."
"True."
He sighs. "Asuka, may you promise me something?"
"I don't make promised to just anyone."
"Well, perhaps you will. Promise me not to confuse the proper time and place for actions. Sometimes, you must fight. Other times, you need to be a shoulder to cry into." He nods. "Goodbye."
Without another word, she watches him walk away.
"Wark?" Pen Pen pecks at the empty can.
"I agree. He's weird."
Rei wakes up. She rolls over in bed and sees Shinji on the floor. While she would not think such a position would be comfortable, he appeared to be quite happy to sleep there. She steps out of bed. Why am I leaving? She walks out the door. I must leave, but I do not know why.
The halls are mostly empty. A skeleton crew runs NERV. Most of the janitors and other maintenance crews lost part of their families in the previous Angel attack. Most left. Only the highest ranked technicians have stayed in full. Unlike the others, the Sub-Commander did not offer them a choice. As a result, Rei passes by three personnel despite the long distance. It also seems to be early in the morning. Five perhaps?
She walks to a doorway that is only able to be opened by four people. The girl swipes her ID across the scanner and the door opens. Why am I going to Terminal Dogma?
"Hello."
She knows the voice, so she does not bother turning. "You were drawn in as well, Kaworu?"
"We truly are alike in many ways." He smiles. It appears genuine, but she there may be reasons to doubt the sincerity.
"I cannot allow you to enter. Protocol."
"True. I think you will have company shortly, so do not wander off after you arrive."
"Are you Tabris?"
"I think Doctor Akagi will come to that conclusion within the hour. I do think it is ironic. Adult Lilin often have so understand things before they believe them. The children of Lilin believe before they understand. I like the latter more."
Rei narrows her eyes. "My brother will stop you."
"I know he will, with your help."
"My help?"
"When I say you are like me in many ways, I do not underexaggerate. Well, have a fine day."
"Why did you help me? With Shinji and me? You did not have to, but you elected to regardless."
"We wanted to see Shinji happy."
"We?"
"I really do have to leave. Could we save this conversation for a later date?"
Rei feels the tug. "Alright."
He walks away humming a melody. Joy to the World? She shuts the door behind her. The tug pulls her along. I believe I understand what I am feeling. She enters an elevator and descends to the deepest recesses of NERV. I feel Lilith. She calls.
Kaworu stands in front of the Lilin's attempt to make a god among their kind. Then again, I too am one of their attempts. He senses guards approaching. NERV must have decided he is Tabris by now which is a funny thing. With Ritsuko not being imprisoned, he expected it to be much faster. Oh well.
"I still do not understand why you are compliant this time, but I will not complain. Come. Let us attempt to bring oneness to all!"
Unit 01's eyes glow. Kaworu unmasks his AT field and floats into the sky. Alarms sound off.
"But first, we shall bring a friend along."
They rip the metal from the walls as if it was plastic. Crashing past Unit 02's cage, they reach Unit 04's home. Its docile soul proves receptive to his desire, so it follows his whims as well.
Midair, he rotates his body until he faces towards Terminal Dogma.
Funny. I thought marching towards certain death would be terrifying, yet I feel elation.
As alarms blare, he hums Ode to Joy.
"Gah!" Shinji sits up in surprise when he sees the most unexpected face mere centimeters from his. And her breathe tickles. "What the hell are you doing in my room, Mari!"
"This's Rei's room, Puppy."
Why am I having a hard time breathing? He looks down. Shit! Don't look down blouse, Shinji! Bad! He closes his eyes. "Get off my chest." She's half-sitting, half-lying on top of him. How did she enter this locked apartment and why did she think this was a good idea?
She giggles and rolls off. "Wanted to wake you up, then I thought of Electra. It worked."
She stands up and pulls him to his feet.
"Where's Rei?"
Without a word, she drags him out of the bedroom, out of the apartment, and down NERV's halls.
"What are you doing?"
She speaks, but it's almost as if it's to herself. He tries to break free of her grip, but it's strong. Very strong. Plus, he's still groggy. "I thought he would've been in a better spot, but NO. He and his ass were asleep. Did anyone bother telling me? No. Fuck you, Sparky. I'm just one asshole, not a god. Don't expect me to just know these kinda things."
"Mari?"
"Hurry up, Puppy. You need to get to the Evas. An Angel is coming."
"How do you know?"
She doesn't answer. He tries to keep pace with her. They receive funny looks from the handful of maintenance workers they pass. Why is it so far from the Eva cages to the base's apartments? Why isn't there an alarm if there's an Angel?
As if to answer his question. he hears thunderous explosions. The red flashing of the alarms lights up the halls.
"Shit! We're late." Mari lets go of his hand and dashes in a full sprint. Shinji does everything he can to follow. He recognizes these passages. They're close. He knows when they arrived as the see a giant hole in the side of the wall.
"The Angel is already inside our base?" He doesn't see Unit 01 it its cage. Only one other person was a good pilot for this Eva. "Rei!"
Mari slaps him. "Just get in the fucking robot, Shinji."
He points at the cages. "My Eva isn't even there! Rei must be-"
She slaps him again.
"Stop doing that!"
"There has to be one left behind, and I'll slap your face off until I get you in one. If not, Rei will DIE."
I must protect Rei.
He runs past Unit 01's cage. He sees twisted metal around the walls of the other two holding areas. Unit 04 has vanished. Unit 02 still rests. Without thinking, he runs up to the entry plug. Only three technicians try to get the Eva operational. Are the others dead? Is this a terrorist attack? Where's Rei? Where's Asuka? What's happening!
He enters the entry plug and inserts it. He starts it. Thank you, Asuka, for never switching this back to German.
Misato's face comes onto his HUD immediately. He has seen Misato angry. He has seen her scared, terrified even. The look on her face is on a whole different level. Something is very wrong.
Her words come out forced. "Shinji, Kaworu is an Angel. He hijacked Units 01 and 04. He is descending to Terminal Dogma. Stop him."
"Kaworu?" The boy who smiles? The one who wanted him to be with Rei again? But, he's… he's a human. The others were all monsters. Kaworu is a person.
"Go, NOW!"
He lurches forward. The controls act sluggish. This's Asuka's Eva. She's the one it's configured to, or maybe it's Mari's psyche.
Help me. Help me, please. I don't know what to do. I…
His mind shatters as if it was hit by a mace. He screams. His higher thinking succumbs to the pain, leaving nothing but instinct, the instinct to protect one's child. Let me protect her.
They rush forward through the torn metal made by Kaworu. They see a tube, like the one they were at during Tokyo's blackout. It's access route 2. They look down for a moment and see their foes. A small boy and two Evas. The trio descends slowly.
They leap down and let gravity do all the work. The boy looks up and smiles. Somehow, they hear his words clearly. "You're late again, my friend."
Evangelion and child roar as one. They slam on top Unit 04. The red behemoth fights against the other two Evas without restrain, without remorse. It wants to tear the Evas to shreds. It wants to squash the boy. It wants to protect the one it loves just as it believes she loves it. Nothing will stand in the monster's way like… any mother would to protect her child.
"Kaworu, why are you doing this?"
He floats down, hands behind his back as if he's some butler. "I must. It is my nature."
Unit 02 slashes Hikari's Eva across its neck. Blood gushes out and covers the lone Eva. The color doesn't change. It was blood red already.
"I can control flesh of my flesh, like Unit 04. It has no will to fight against me. Unit 01 has proven to be most helpful as well."
Unit 02 kicks Shinji's Eva causing it to crash against the wall. With this precious moment of time, the berserker takes a hold of the bleeding unit's neck and twists. Kaworu lets its broken body fall to the floor.
"Ah, I never did get to see Unit 02 fight like this. It truly is a marvel, like its original pilot."
"Leave Asuka out of this!"
He tries to stab Kaworu, but an AT field stop their knife meters away from the Fifth Child. Unit 01 leaps onto Unit 02 and Shinji and stabs them in the chest, the heart. He wails.
"You cannot penetrate this, Shinji. Did you know Lilin have these too? They surround your hearts, your souls. I once thought that nothing could break through, but I was proven otherwise. Like the AT fields of your heart, it was broken by fields of equal power. Rei. Asuka. You are not merely a single soul anymore. You are a part of their souls just as much as they are a part of yours. I find that beautiful. Let us make this a private conversation, shall we?"
Everything shakes. Warning flash across Unit 02's screen. All communication has been cut off.
Unit 02 and 01 crash to the floor. Kaworu floats onwards. Shinji's Eva wraps its arms around them, but Unit 02 rips them off, literately. It beats the Eva with its town limbs until the enemy moves no more. Turning around, it rushes to Kaworu. He already teared the final door open.
They charge after the final Angel. As he floats to… Lilith. Unit 02 reaches its hand out to grab Kaworu, crush him, kill him. Their hand hits an impenetrable AT field.
"As I said before, you cannot defeat me."
"No! Stop this!"
"But she can."
His systems flash another warning, one that he's never seen before. Unit 02's sensors detect the AT fields of two Angels. Their hand closes around Kaworu. His AT field is gone. The Eva turns around and sees Rei standing over them. She looks afraid.
"I wanted both of you here again for a reason."
Unit 02 squeezes, but Shinji forces the hand back. I'm not a murderer!
"Twins. It's a simple concept. Two Lilin share the same womb. Look at where it brought you. I wish I was the one to think of that concept for the two of you."
"Kaworu, what are you talking about?"
"Am I the last Angel, Shinji?"
"Yes!"
"No, the first Angel you fought was the third. Adam has perished. His final death happened days ago, a wonderful deviation, yet the S2 engines still exist. Lilith's body lies behind me, but her soul is not there. That Angel is why you still have a sister, Shinji. It is why she has the power to stop me now. You'll have to trust her."
"Kaworu…"
"There is one more Angel after me. They are called Lilin, but you might know the title humanity as more appropriate."
"That doesn't make sense. I am not like you!"
"Human. Angel. They are the same thing. I came here earlier this time. Be careful who you say this to, but you will battle the Lilin who desire Third… Well, I suppose it is now Forth Impact. It will start on the last day of the year and end of the first day."
"How do you know that?"
He smiles. "An old friend."
They stand there for a moment. The Angel nods. Shinji's hand cramps from the strain.
Kaworu closes his eyes. "Tell Kyoko goodbye for me, Shinji Ikari."
Then, he dies.
The girl waits. The Eva walked back into place, partially submerged in the LCL. She stands with a few others, waiting for the entry plug to eject.
When she first started piloting, Asuka had always imagined this occasion to be a celebration. Men and women would line up and congratulate her on killing every Angel. Asuka Langley Sohryu would go down in history books as the world's savior. Right now, she has only two thoughts in her head.
I want to crawl into some hole and die.
Shinji needs me.
The second thought won out. Maybe it's because she'll be the only friendly face he could see. Fuyutsuki called in everyone else for an emergency meeting. Asuka's a smart girl. She knows what they're talking about. SEELE sent them the Fifth Child. The Fifth Child was an Angel. It was on purpose.
The fact that Ritsuko wasn't worried about the second detected AT field also speaks volumes. Rei. Since the first Angel blew up Antarctica and we killed the third Angel onwards, I was sorta wondering where the second wandered off to. It makes her smile.
The entry plug ejects. The hatch opens and LCL pours out. Asuka sloshes through without a care in the world. She throws her arms around the whimpering boy. Kaworu said there will be a time for fighting and a time for comforting. I know what time this is.
He buries his face into her shoulder and cries.
Asuka Langley Sohryu might be finished as a pilot. She might be a failure at being a tactical officer. She might not be the easiest of people to get along with, but she WILL get this one thing right.
Right now, Shinji needs a friend. She holds onto him. And I won't ever let go.
Misato's voice: "We beat the Angel. Kaji's alive. Woo hoo! Oh, and Kensuke's alive too. Good for him. Anyway, NERV is about to get clobbered by humans. After killing world ending monsters for chapter after chapter, we're going to get our asses kicked by our brethren. People are going to die. I'll gladly die if it means my… my kids can survive. It'll all happen in The End of Evangelion, Air. More importantly, there'll be fan service without creepy hospital scenes!"
Author's notes: Holy shit. I finally did this chapter. A lot of my secrets were revealed here including some stuff that'll hopefully be a little confusing to y'all for now. This chapter didn't capture my initial vision which was much more grandiose, especially the fight against Kaworu. Instead, this chapter took a life of its own and became more… dark, gloomy, and cynical.
Kaji's alive. Yep. And he's in Germany with Kensuke and Hikari for now. Speaking about that, why didn't any of Hikari's sisters or her father die? I figured NERV would try to protect family members more than the average person and probably put them inside shelters within the GeoFront. That means they were in the one spot that wasn't flattened by the semi-Third Impact.
So, what's the state of mind for the pilots? Shinji is drained. Asuka feels worthless. Rei's trying to patch together the world that's falling apart around her. Hikari's out and suffered Toji's fate. Mari's being Mari.
I'm doing EoE in two parts with Air being the first. I'm not exactly sure where I'll put the half-way mark. I already know the battle with the Harpies will be hard to write. I write one-on-one fights better then group brawls, so I'll take however much time I need to make sure it doesn't suck.
Kaworu. Yeah, he showed up and died in the same chapter. Why did he get Shinji and Rei to see each other? Like canon, Kaworu just wants Shinji to feel loved. This time, Rei could do it for him.
Before any of you think Ooh, Kaworu time traveled and made Shinji and Rei twins. It was all him! I would like to say that's not correct. A little before Shinji killed him Kaworu said, "I wish I was the one to think of that concept for the two of you." It wasn't Kaworu who did it, but he was (quite obviously) an ally. I don't think that most of y'all would think that, but I wouldn't want any misconceptions. Kaworu doesn't exactly speak in the most straightforward ways after all.
Until now, every chapter has covered just over twenty minutes of material. This time, it'll be about forty-six minutes of material for just the first half. I'll be thrilled to have the next chapter up in a month's time. I just figured I should give you a heads up. Then again, I could have it out under a dozen days if the writing goes perfectly (which has happened to me a few times already for this story).
Replies to comments (I reached 100! Hurray!):
ADeadDieHard, IRL got progressively worse, but now it's all better. Hurray again! Anyway, who is Rei III? She's Rei, sorta. There'll be a better explanation for the inter-relationship between all three Reis during my EoE. I think Rei III's personality has been shown during this chapter. She has the speech patters like what she had at the start of the story, but she retained the emotional aspects of Rei II at her death. Her memories are messed up, but Sakura managed to help her a lot with that. Also, Rei III has superpowers like canon Rei III. There's an explanation why too.
Traitor of All Traitors, I'm not sure exactly why you felt that you read this all twice, unless you posted that from when I accidentally posted chapter 22 for chapter 23 like a friggen idiot. I'll assume that's why. Also, sorry for being a friggen idiot.
Guest, will the upcoming chapters be more based on the anime or movie version? Well, the next chapter will be more about the first half of EoE. After that, my answer is… Well, it'll depend on a lot of things. For example, will Instrumentality be averted? I can confirm that some things in EoE are not things I will write. "Then, the countless nude Reis all shift their faces to Shinji while keeping the body of Rei." (Yes, that happens during EoE for a fleeting moment.) I don't think that'll transfer over to writing too well.
Kreio, WOW. That's an awesome review. Thank you so much! I sent almost 2k worth of words in a PM reply, but here's a (extremely) condensed version that addresses one of your questions anyway.
Why did Shinji never confront Gendo about what happened to Rei? Like canon Shinji, this Shinji developed habits early on that stuck with him for the rest of the story. While this Shinji has several positive traits (such as being less self-absorbed and caring for Rei), he had a habit of not talking with Gendo. When he did, he sorta blew it. ("Why did you make Asuka live in my bedroom?") He tried it with Rei, Ritsuko, and Kozo too and that didn't work. Specifically, Rei didn't seem to want Shinji to find out about her. Plus, he's still a flawed character and a 14-year-old boy who's literately fighting to keep the world from turning into orange marmalade. (Oh, and Rei's past is a big secret. I couldn't have Shinji find out a lot earlier in the story.)
Again, thank you so much for leaving such an amazing review. It was also my 100th. To quote episode 26, "Congratulations!"
List of notable (enough for me) things that happened that aren't canon:
Gendo is absent from every scene.
Asuka is with Misato and Shinji when they find out how Rei's alive.
Rei gets some help with her memories (and a lot of emotional support) from Sakura.
Hikari lost her left leg, and now is in Germany with Kensuke and Kaji.
Kaworu helped Shinji resurrect his relationship with Rei.
Asuka doesn't become catatonic.
Kaworu takes Units 01 (there's reason why) and 04. Though, Kyoto proved why no one should mess with a Sohryu.
Kaworu warns Shinji and Rei about the upcoming battle.