UNTOUCHED
A story by Anette S
Disclaimer: Jo is the boss here; I, a faithful subject, am here only to entertain you.
Author's note: And so it goes on... hopefully this is a sign of the muse forgiving me and coming back.
Please forgive the inaccuracies; I rely on Google maps and an overactive imagination. ;-)
At press time for this chapter, "Untouched" had 391 reviews, 405 followers and was a favorite of 207 readers. I thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
Comments are golden!
Last but not least, a big thank you to my beta dancesabove.
Love, Anette
Chapter 24
Trio
Hermione walked out of the small bookshop on Exmouth Market that had become something of a favourite of hers in the past months. New book in hand, she set her sights on the equally familiar small cafe a bit further down the street.
Despite the November chill, she chose to sit outside – after all, a sunny day in London at this time of the year was to be treasured.
Like hundreds of her peers in this great city, she settled into her book, the warmth of her coffee seeping through her disposable Styrofoam cup.
She tried not to be nervous. After all, it was only Harry. Still, there'd been something in the air the night Severus returned from his own meeting with Harry, and although he had said few words about the matter, she knew her old friend's invitation for 'coffee or something'– with the P.S. of 'Ron might come' – was a bit out of the ordinary.
Harry and Ron.
Yes, she tried very hard not to be nervous.
So here she was. Some of the crowds of people rushed down the busy street, while others slowed their walk, meandering into the many coffee and tea shops and other establishments scattered left and right of the road.
The sky was unusually clear on this particular day, and she closed her eyes for a mere moment to enjoy the sunshine on her eyelids.
In her light cream coat and thick chocolaty brown hat and scarf, she was not concerned with being recognised by anyone. After all, as deep in Muggle London as she was currently, the chances of someone stumbling on her were close to nil.
Just as she was about to pay attention to her book again, she caught sight of a black-haired man rounding the corner, his eyes searching for any sight of her.
With a wave of her hand she brought Harry's attention to her, the smile on her face matching his own.
"Hermione!" he said excitedly, leaning down to hug her. "It's great to see you," he added, sitting down.
"Where is Ron?" she asked, expecting to see the familiar redhead not far behind.
"Oh, he'll meet us in half an hour in Wilmington Square Garden. I hope you don't mind." He said it with a fair share of nervousness in his voice. "I need some private time with you first." The young man raked his hand through his hair.
She followed his movement with her knowing eyes, and before he could repeat the gesture, she leaned over the table and took his hand in hers.
"Harry," she said softly, giving him one of her searching looks. "What's wrong?"
His eyes met hers, frazzled, but then relieved that she'd opened the topic for him. "It's okay. I don't want you to worry. Look," he glanced over his shoulder. "What do you say that we get coffees and find a friendly park bench in the gardens, where Ron can spot us?"
"Sure." She glanced around, then smirked, "The decor of this place leaves much to be desired."
"Yeah. They're all the same now, if you're not in Kensington, that is..." he observed with a feeble smile.
He rushed in and purchased a coffee, the largest they had, and soon the pair found their way to the garden, speaking of little things, Harry gathering courage to broach the big issue, and Hermione giving him time.
Some children ran beside them. Their mother, walking a few steps behind the two energetic lads, warned them with a raised voice not to go far.
Harry's eyes stayed on the children a moment longer than necessary, and Hermione knew him too well not to notice it.
"Severus told me you were at Grimmauld Place the other day," she started their conversation, nudging him gently to open up.
"Yeah. Sorry for not coming to say hi, I was in a..." He sighed, meeting her eyes at last. "Let's just call it a peculiar mood."
"I gathered," she said softly.
"Why? Did he say something to you?" he asked, a hint of alarm in his voice.
She hid her small smile in her tea cup. "Oh, he said something."
Faced with Harry's now-worried and somewhat crestfallen look, she decided to come clean with her tease. "He said that he sees potential in you," she said, her smile more evident now. "I can see how that alone might put you in a… how did you describe it? A 'peculiar mood.'"
Harry let out a long relieved breath, but catching his friend's quizzical eyebrow, he knew she must have sensed that there was more to the story of his short visit to Grimmauld.
"Harry, I know you. Something is up, and since Severus is keeping quiet, and trust me –" she paused, placing her hand over his – "I tried," at which he chuckled, "I can only deduct that it's something serious. And I want to know everything, now."
"Bossypants," he said affectionately.
Turning around discreetly, he let his wand fall out of his sleeve into his hand and whispered a narrow-range Muffliato.
"Just for the Muggles..." he said, the answer to her unspoken question when he'd cast the spell. Taking a long sip of his coffee, he let his eyes fall to their clasped hands for a moment before he began.
And so he spoke, hesitantly at first. Then, reassured by her warm eyes and forgiving words, he trudged on.
He didn't notice when she took the cold coffee out of his hand and threw it in the bin behind them. All he felt was the warmth of her mittens as she now held both of his hands in hers, the woolly texture curing the numbness of his bare knuckles as much as her comfort cured the anguish in his soul.
He found it difficult to look at her, so he looked at those hands. Somehow it helped the words to flow. Softly, a difficult confession formed on his lips, the details being muddled, blurring the line between what could be forgiven and what would stay as a mark for a long time.
She listened as the man who was chosen by the perfidy of the fates to be the saviour of the wizarding world confessed his fall, the fall that was silent but no less painful. The fall that was still not fully stopped, only mildly slowed since his recent decisions to confide his problems to Severus and Ginny.
She understood, in her present situation more than ever, how it felt to be pushed into the cruel and violent madness of the war. No one came out unscarred, and to think that things could continue simply and pleasantly for all was a very childish perspective.
Ron found them curled into each other, and to the uninformed observer they would seem like an ordinary couple in a loving embrace. Her arms were around him, and his head hidden in the crook of her neck. It was indeed a loving embrace – an embrace that forgave and understood – an embrace that told him, together with words whispered into his unruly hair, that she understood, that it was all right not to be perfect; to have demons.
She noticed Ron first, but her hands stayed put, rubbing slow circles into Harry's back as he struggled to breathe and not cry in shame at his friend's reaction. Her shimmering eyes met Ron's understanding gaze as they silently lamented the fate of their dear friend.
Harry finally sensed the presence of someone. Turning out of her arms, he rubbed his eyes with the heel of his palm.
"Hello, mate," Ron said as Harry composed himself. "So I guess you told her," he stated the obvious as Hermione nodded, pulling a handkerchief out of her handbag and silently passing it to Harry as she willed her unshed tears to go away with a deep breath.
"Hi, Hermione," he said as she stood to hug him. "You okay?" He received a shaky nod in reply.
"I think we need some hot chocolate and a change of venue," she said as Harry joined them.
He agreed and at that moment became aware that all that had just happened could have been witnessed by almost anyone. He would have been deeply mortified at his loss of control over his emotions in such a public place if he hadn't placed a Muggle repellent spell along with the Muffliato.
It had been a long while since they'd spent time together, just the three of them. Although they saw each other quite often, it was usually while others, be it the Weasleys or the Lupins, were in their company. In those isolated situations when it was just one of the boys with her, the conversation was difficult if they grazed below the surface of their everyday lives.
They had spent a year on the run, in the most intimate and trusting situation one could share with friends; still, the rift caused by her captivity and their negation of their own issues made things tense.
As they walked to the small patisserie around the corner, she felt that a shift had been made. It might now be possible for them to talk, for the first time, as sincerely as they had done in the past.
"Umm... so, how have you been, Hermione?" Ron asked, breaking the uncomfortable silence that closed in on them after the waitress took their order.
They exchanged a look that clearly said 'keep talking until he comes round,' and she dutifully threw herself into describing Teddy's latest mischief.
"... and you can imagine Tonks's face when she realized her dearest son wasn't suddenly displaying his metamorphogus traits, but had simply managed to paint his hair red!" Hermione laughed, finishing her tale and sipping on the fresh cup of hot chocolate they were gratefully imbibing at that moment.
Harry smiled, shaking his head. "I guess that magical colouring set Fred and George gave him for his birthday hasn't lost its potency yet," he commented, leaning back in his chair.
He observed the relaxed conversation, the atmosphere of the good old days, and for a moment imagined that it was possible to have that again.
Ron caught his drifting attention with a question.
"What?" Harry asked, obviously not listening.
"Shake out of it, man, I asked what my sis was making for dinner, and can I be invited?" Ron replied, a smirk on his face. Indeed he'd asked something very different, but there was no point in repeating it.
"I have no idea, but you know you can always come by," Harry said, and Hermione was once again struck with the feeling of loss – loss of the year they'd had to rebuild their lives and form new habits, such as dropping by your sister's new home for an impromptu dinner or joining the twins for Sunday quiddich, a regular occurrence nowadays, as she'd found out recently.
"Oi, Hermione, what's the matter?" Ron asked, noticing her wistful gaze.
"Nothing," she replied, shaking her head. "I just... you know, I miss you. This," she said, motioning to indicate their comfortable table talk.
"Yeah," Harry said, taking her hand in his again. "Thank you. For earlier. I really am a mess," he said, once again lowering his gaze.
"We all are," she whispered, and Ron ran his hand comfortingly down her back. Nowadays his touch didn't make her jump and run screaming, which was a blessing he was well aware of.
"You know, I don't think I'll continue with the Auror training program," Harry said. "I talked to Gin and she agrees with whatever I decide."
Ron looked at him, surprised. "Are you sure about this? You are the best we have on the team."
"I am sure Ron. I don't want to do it. I've fought, we all have…" He paused and met Hermione's eyes as well as Ron's "…more than we should, and we had no choice. But now we have. I think I'm done with fighting."
There was conviction in his tone of voice, a certainty born of difficult times.
"What will you do? Not that there is any rush," Hermione assured him.
"I don't know. I keep remembering how it was when I first discovered magic was real. I thought it could fix everything." Harry's eyes took on a glow of hope, his speech rushed.
"I think I might train to be a healer," he said finally. "But I'm done with Aurors, as long as I have any say in the matter," he added.
"Merlin knows that if you're going, I'm going as well. The thing is just too stressful," Ron declared, swigging another large gulp from his chocolate mug.
"Well, that takes a lot of weight off my shoulders," said Harry. "I didn't want you to think I was abandoning the ship," he explained.
"You two have a communication problem," Hermione said with a smile on her face. She was genuinely happy with her friends' decisions. Aurors were in the line of fire far too often for her liking, and she feared for them every day.
"And you? What will you do?" Hermione asked Ron. He simply shrugged.
"Haven't got a clue, actually. Oh," he said, suddenly realizing something. "Mum will go mental when I tell her. Actually, it might go better if you tell her first, Harry. She always liked you more," he said, earning a swat on the shoulder from the man in question.
"That's not true and you know it. I may be her favourite son-in-law..."
"Her only son in law," Hermione corrected with a grin.
"Yes, good point, but still... you're her flesh and blood," he said to Ron.
"Which makes me more susceptible to her jinxes. She thinks twice before she jinxes you!" Ron replied.
Suddenly Hermione burst into laughter, and the boys soon joined in until they all were doubled over with stomach cramps.
And just like that, it was like old times. Almost.
"We need to get together more, just the three of us," Harry said, placing his arms on Ron's and Hermione's shoulders. "We need this; the rest of the world be damned with their wishes and expectations," he said. "They can wait."
"That's the spirit!" Hermione said warmly.
"It was your boyfriend that instilled the thought into my thick head," Harry said, and luckily Hermione didn't notice Ron's sharp frown at the mention of said 'boyfriend.' She was far too busy being happy at the mention of the man she loved, and hopeful that they could form a friendship in the years to come.
"Oh, did he?" she asked, quite curious to hear Harry's answer.
"Yeah." Harry's eyes roamed the small establishment in a feeble attempt to minimize his words.
"Harry James Potter, would you by any chance be telling me right now that you think one Severus Tobias Snape was..." she cleared her throat dramatically, earning a smile from Harry and an eye-roll from Ron "...right about something?"
Harry chuckled. "He is a good man. I never knew it before, but I can see it now," he said honestly, and Hermione's eyes filled with tears.
"You have no idea how much it means to me that you will try to understand him. I need both of you in my life," she said gently.
Ron observed the exchange first with scepticism, then the obligatory refusal of their words, even though he could not ignore it anymore. He still had more than his fair share of doubts about Severus Snape, and could not fully accept Hermione's relationship with the man.
"Don't think I don't see that frown, Ronald," Hermione jested, trying not to sound too harsh. But the lightness of her tone didn't negate the point.
He met her eyes. "I'm trying. It's not easy."
"I know, but keep in mind that Severus is not going anywhere out of my life. In fact, he is coming into it more." She blushed, but spoke on. "He asked me to move in with him, and I said yes, naturally. We will be looking for a place of our own soon. In fact, I've already started," she said, a knowing smile on her face.
Harry watched his friend's face, knowing an explosion was not far off. Ron had had anger issues ever since carrying the medallion during their hunt for the horcruxes, so he reacted quickly.
With his eyes on Ron, Harry told Hermione that they'd be right back, and pulled the other man out of his chair and towards the exit of the small cafe.
Hermione watched their animated discussion through the window with more than her fair share of worry.
After a few minutes they returned, the black-haired man's eyes showing relief and understanding, and the red-headed one's cast downwards.
Harry had the good sense to disappear into the bathroom for a while.
"I'm… sorry," Ron murmured as he sat down.
She waited until he managed to look at her, and gave him a reassuring smile.
"I have a short fuse nowadays, and Harry reads me better than most," he explained. She nodded in understanding.
Ron looked in her eyes. "It's just... of all the men in the entire world, did it have to be him?" he asked, his voice equal measures of irony and sadness.
She sighed and took his hand in hers. "No. But it was him. And we have been over this," she reminded him, tiredness sneaking into her voice.
"I know," he said, leaning back into his chair.
"Ron, you know that we would not be happy as a couple together. It was one more of those ideas and impressions everybody else pushed onto us," she said calmly.
"I know, I know... but I do love you," he said, his eyes wide, sincere.
She smiled softly. "And I love you. But I am in love with Severus."
Ron let out a long sigh. "So, living together? If he had any sense, he would be on his knee by now," he huffed, shaking his head.
Hermione smiled, although the image made her suddenly nervous. "I think he's waiting for me to be ready for the commitment, not to mention that we..." She trailed off, suddenly aware that her intimate life was definitely not something she wanted to discuss with Ron.
Thankfully, The Boy Who Lived knew when to get back to the table, and so the discussion floated back into safer waters.
They walked her back home, always careful, always vigilant. They didn't have to be Aurors to act like ones. The memories would forever be with them.
Passing Wilmington Square, her eyes caught the sign of a real estate agency on one of the townhouses, the same sign she'd already spotted on her way to meet them.
With a satisfied smirk and already forming a plan, she hugged the boys and agreed to meet them next week.
Until then, she had some houses to hunt.