Settling Accounts

"So weird," Kagome thought as she wandered around the halls of her castle where almost everyone she met congratulated her on her marriage, "that dog really did a number on me with his insidious 'chain training' or whatever sadistic practice that was. He's ruined me. It doesn't feel natural to just walk around anymore without wondering where Sesshoumaru is or if I'm truly free. Was that the point? Am I really falling for his brainwashing or is Sesshoumaru not that bad of a guy at all? Every time I make my mind on him there is just something that feels off, and now Sango has changed her tone completely and is acting weird. I don't know what I can do to leave this place feeling alright."

The fear Kagome clung to was the thought of Sesshoumaru changing who she was throughout this experience, but sometimes she dared to wonder if that'd be so bad. She hated this feeling of dread that always overcame her when she was alone and always at conflict with her feelings all the time. Perhaps that was why she liked hiding her identity when she escaped allowing her to be someone else, because when she had to face who she was and the situation she'd been born in she let her mind be plagued by fear and doubt. Goshinki had always been her cure all for these problems, but she didn't know if she'd ever see her brother again so it was time to rely on herself to stay calm and be free to live her life. She'd have to start today.

"I'm not going to runaway from anything anymore," Kagome forced a smile on her face as she made her way to the servant's quarters to find Ayame, "before I leave this soil I need to make the best effort I can to throw the past behind me and work towards my future. There is no guarantee it will be a great future, but it's still mine to make."

A day of positivity was definitely in order for Kagome. Not only did she know changing her outlook on everything would be the best cure all for her wandering thoughts, but she couldn't leave the few friends she had behind with worry.

"You don't actually have to pay me you know," Ayame seemed completely surprised to find Kagome before her in her workshop holding the exact amount of gold that was owed, "I'm paid by your family to do this stuff already. I thought I just had to give you a price to appease that dog you married."

Kagome rose an eyebrow staring at the gold in her palm, "Why doesn't anyone just take my gold? You're getting it whether you want it or not Ayame. I just got thrown into the world of adulthood and I was told nothing in life is free, and that beautiful dress you made should definitely not be free."

"Not that it was ever my gold to spend," Kagome quickly told herself, "that was technically a gift but I doubt that was free either. I'll be working to pay off that debt my whole life."

"The world of adulthood?" the red headed demoness almost snickered, "you feeling okay Kagome? That doesn't sound like something you'd say. I mean if you're sure it wouldn't hurt to actually have a bit more gold I guess. I just hate taking from a friend."

"I'm settling the wedding accounts and everyone gets paid depending on services rendered," Kagome spoke as though Sesshoumaru had possessed her, "everyone. I even owe my husband eighty gold of his own money that's how serious this is. Can you please take your gold now so I don't feel like an idiot just standing here and holding it."

"You do humor me muchly little former human princess," Ayame took on the fake tone of a threatening wolf demon as she snatched up the gold, "just please don't become that serious in your new life of 'adulthood'. Serious is boring and doesn't suit you well."

Kagome gave her a friend a smile, "Alright then. Now that the debt is paid I will have to restore my reputation in your eyes I guess. Ayame can you lend me some needle and thread, oh and a bit of wol- pelt from some sort of game. Please? If you don't I'm going to take it anyway. I'm sure all my supplies got thrown away in the raid that transpired in my room."

"You almost asked for a wolf pelt," Ayame rolled her eyes, "you should know better. Fine consider it all a wedding gift so you don't conduct a raid of your own. Needle and thread is all over the place in this mess and I still have that ice bear pelt I brought from Winter Spiral. It's not doing me any good though I'd much rather give you a nice white dog pelt, but fresh out. For the time being that is."

Ayame's discussion of pelts oozed with disrespect, but Kagome deserved that for almost asking for a wolf pelt. Ayame would never use a wolf pelt since she considered both the demons and animal alike her kin.

Ayame's coldness didn't last for long, however, as she thought on Kagome's request.

"So you're back into the world of sewing are you? About time Kagome! They say a hobby helps through this sort of thing, and if you have to have yourself a hobby it might as well be one where you can make something beautiful."

"It will be something beautiful since I'm not going to let that wedding dress fabric go to waste," Kagome explained, "going to rework it into something practical so I'll always have it with me Ayame. I'll always have you with me. Unless, of course, you want to go with me? Or maybe you can visit. You have family in Winter Spiral don't you? This doesn't have to be a final goodbye you know."

Ayame sighed reflecting on how it was indeed good-bye, "I do but if I go back there my family will expect me to return the same as I left and that's just not me anymore. All of the King's children seem to be born playing roulette when it comes to their appearances and abilities. I don't know if he's ever even absorbed any of my kin, but be thankful you're no wolf youkai. You wouldn't make it."

"Probably not. Ayame why did you leave? I asked you once how a wolf demoness of Winter Spiral ends up being a royal seamstress and you said you'd never tell me. I'm not going to force you, but it is my last chance to attempt have my curiosity fed."

Ayame surprised Kagome by wearing a smirk, "I really said I'd never tell? Wow a lot has changed hasn't it? I must've thought I came off as so mysterious and interesting saying things like that. My past is completely embarrassing. Alright consider this a wedding gift as well but don't you dare go run your mouth to Kagura or anyone else. I basically got kicked out of my den because I wasn't good enough for the man my pack tried to marry me off to."

Kagome blinked, "What? That is-

"Completely utterly embarrassing like I said, and I'm alright with that. You know what's better than constantly popping out pups for a jerk that doesn't want you? Creating dresses that everyone is envious of. Yeah I'll take that any day, but you know what maybe it is fitting I reveal this all to you. After all you might meet that scumbag one day. Kouga is his name. I was told my whole life I'd be the mate of a powerful pack leader and I began to idolize that man and our future, but when I finally met him he acted like I was nothing more than dirt on the bottom of his paw. I tried to force myself to get over it, after all we had to marry no matter what. I chased him everywhere and tried to get interested in his pack politics, but then he just decided there was no way he could see myself with a woman such as myself. I guess if you're a male it's okay to break your obligations. My pack was absolutely livid with me. Blamed me for the whole thing and urged me to continue hunting him down and force him to keep his word. They wanted me to embarrass myself further all for our stupid wolf youkai pride. I said hell with that and took up an almost human life with my stupid little human hobby and it's been roses ever since. I miss hunting and roaming the mountains with my kin, but it just wasn't worth it. I wasn't going to suffer for an idiot that didn't want me."

Kagome realized she definitely wasn't as strong as Ayame even though the story made no sense to her. Who exactly was this Kouga guy and how he could treat Ayame that way? It was a bit hard to relate since Sesshoumaru basically forced everyone's hand when it came to obtaining her and now InuYasha was apparently going to act like a dangerous fool because of her, but Kagome just couldn't imagine Ayame being denied. Ayame was beautiful, so how could a fellow wolf demon dishonor her in that way?

"Ayame I'm so sorry," Kagome felt pained reflecting on what it must have felt like to be forced into an arranged marriage where an eager bride was considered not good enough for the husband.

"Don't be," Ayame gave a fanged smile, "Kouga is just a freak of nature. Claims to be proud to be a wolf and wants his kind to be successful but then instead of furthering his blood and listening to his instincts he obsesses over garbage like magic and treasures. A true youkai should rely on their own strength and not cheating, but they all want to find short cuts now a days to keep their territories. How pathetic and ironic it is that the wolf girl that sews for a living is more like a youkai than these so called great but terrible daiyoukai leaders."

Kagome didn't know if it were intentional or not, but Ayame was also describing Sesshoumaru. Kagome knew that Sesshoumaru, who made it clear he took pride in his own power and believed no one could rival him, was going to use her blood to somehow cheat and was also relying on prophecy in order to hold onto what he inherited. Either Sesshoumaru was a hypocrite, or as Ayame implied things were getting quite competitive between other demons.

"One last wedding gift," Kagome showed Ayame a bit of desperation in her eyes, "can you tell me what it's like in Winter Spiral? I don't think I know exactly what I'm walking into."

"Forgive me but you don't at all Kagome. It's nothing like this place. I'm not really an expert on Havensbrooke since me and all your maids basically never leave the castle, but it just seems like all the magic has been sucked out of this place. Foreign youkai and your father is really all all there is that isn't human related. Everywhere you go in Winter Spiral though something is always changing or creating problems. It's kind of hard to describe, but it's just not really a place for humans. Not that I'm calling you a human, but let's just say if you're away from Sesshoumaru you gotta be thinking on your feet all the time."

Clearly Ayame did not like Sesshoumaru, but even she was saying it was best to take full advantage of his vows of protection. It sounded like Winter Spiral was a bit unpredictable for a human such as herself. Kagome couldn't blame Ayame for comparing her to a human. Everyone always made that comparison and Kagome had pretty much embraced a human life. There was nothing demonic about her anyway so why live a lie? She was fine being a human, and once separated from her family it wouldn't really matter anymore.

"I take it I should think on your words and take it as a warning," Kagome knew she wore a goofy smile on her face, "but part of me considers it a challenge. Depraved of any and all magic seems like a good way to describe this place, and I can believe it. I've never seen anything like that potion Sesshoumaru used to disguise himself as human until now. Is that magic?"

"Kinda. Potions are really the only way to harness magic anymore. Other than curses and what not magic isn't really something that can be wielded unless you use potions. That's why that damn Kouga got so obsessed it with it. They say the permafrost of our ancestral home in Winter Spiral has magic ingrained it that gives us wolves swift feet, because when away from the mountains we find ourselves running a lot slower. Kouga bought into that and went on some kind of crusade to find a way to bring that power wherever we go. I'm pretty sure he even tried to force shards of ice into the flesh of his legs. Idiot. All of them. I'm no expert on magic Kagome and I really don't want to be, but I can tell you there is a lot of places in Winter Spiral that are like. Temporary magic that could either work for you or against you so be careful in your travels."

Kagome had been curious as to what the political landscape was like in Winter Spiral and the rules of court, but instead she'd been given an unexpected lesson on magic. Temporary magic in certain places? Kagome had never heard of such a thing and found herself wanting to ask more, but Ayame seemed quite bored by the topic and Kagome had to reluctantly give the wolf demoness a farewell embrace as she continued on with her day. After all if she failed in paying off her debts and leaving loose ends untied then the few things she'd been hoping to achieve by having a decent marriage ceremony would be for nothing. Naraku had already ruined a lot of memories yesterday, so she didn't need to further sully things by letting her responsibility fall to the wayside.

"Don't worry Kagome," Ayame tried her best not to show any sadness, "I doubt this is a final goodbye. Wolves don't forget about their companions for long. I'll see you again."

"I hope so," Kagome thought about what her goodbye to Sango would be like and if she had it in her to do this again, "I hope my sister and your clients keep you busy. Keep at it alright? You're amazing at what you do. Is that for Kagura?"

Kagome looked to a nearby dressform that held what seemed to a white kimono with dark pinkish stripes on it as well as a matching hand fan laying on a nearby table.

"She just commissioned it a couple of days ago," Ayame confirmed, "Princess Kagura seems to have a thing for kimonos lately and I must say they suit her well. She'll get to try it on today, hopefully it's to her liking."

"You'll see Kagura? When you do can you tell her I want to meet with her in her bedroom."

It was such an odd request, but Ayame agreed to it despite not understanding why Kagome couldn't just knock on her sister's door.

Before Kagome could contemplate leaving with Sesshoumaru she wanted to pay a visit to Rin if she was indeed still in the castle. Kagome had gathered from the conversation between Kagura and Sesshoumaru that Kagura had been selected to take care of the flower girl he'd brought to their home and was finding herself now unable to. If it were out of fear of what their father would do to some random orphan in their home no one would come looking for Kagome didn't want to call too much attention to the issue by demanding an audience from her older sister. That would be too out of character for her in the event her father was spying on her.

Apparently something else out of character for her was actually paying for the services rendered at her wedding. Kagome had gone into town with Sango at her side for protection and everyone she visited to pay her debts to was very surprised. The older lady that had given her gem stones on credit made a comment that obviously a good man was all Kagome had needed to calm down and give up her rebellious ways.

"I doubt she would have said that if I were still their Princess," Kagome muttered under her breathe feeling a bit insulted that no one had faith in her.

Sango still looked quite distraught despite having tried to hide it the whole afternoon by keeping to several paces behind her mistress at all times, "Everyone was talking about that fire you set and how you ranaway. Once they found out you'd be married off to Sesshoumaru they put two and two together and figured it was an arrangement you didn't favor. You can't blame them for being surprised."

Kagome looked up at the cloudy sky taking in what would be her last afternoon in Havensbrooke, "It's one thing to know they are all gossiping about me in private but it doesn't feel good when they discredit me to my face. I guess I deserve it. Oh well it's finally done. All that's left now is to pay Sesshoumaru what he's owed and no one can say I cheated anyone. That's it then. It's over."

"Lady Kagome?" Sango found it strange that Kagome was talking to herself in such a manner.

Sango had said the two of them would talk later to exchange their final goodbyes, if that would indeed be what they would be doing later, and Kagome would assist into putting that off that scene for as long as she could. Really all there was to do before returning to the castle was to say goodbye to her special place.

"It's nothing," Kagome shook her head, "I'm just being a stupid girl I guess. Sango would you mind giving me a minute? I need to make a visit. I might not get another chance."

"A visit," Sango sighed, "Kagome I can't just leave you out here on your own- not that I'd think you'd try to escape or anything but with InuYasha-

"It's not about InuYasha this time I swear," Kagome shook her head, "you can be nearby. I'm being honest this time. Giving a proper goodbye to her is the least I can do."

The special place Kagome wanted to visit was a small plot of land behind a strip of store fronts and an abandoned chapel. It was a slice of peace just on the other side of a busy street. It had been the place Kagome had always wondered off to when sneaking into town for no one should have questioned why she'd be there. On the grassy plot was nothing more than an old cherry tree, and underneath that was where Kagome's mother had been buried. Her mother was a former Queen, so of course, she had a proper memorial in the so-called family tomb, but when she was young Naraku had revealed to her that her mother requested that if she were to die she wanted to be buried in such an odd place simply because she 'had a fondness for the lonely tree'.

The moment Kagome had learned of this she used it to her advantage. The plot with the tree had become her sanctuary, a perfect place to hide within the city when her identity was eventually found out and attention came her way. She always could use the excuse that she came out to mourn her dead mother instead of admitting she was up to no good. Eventually her special place became the place where she would meet up with InuYasha, the place where she began to fall for the hanyou, the place where she stole his Tetsusaiga when she felt rejected. Sango had known about Kagome's secret, so of course she wouldn't believe that Kagome actually wanted to talk to her mother.

"I'll give you distance," Sango seemed reluctant, "but you won't stay out of my sight. Got that? I don't know what overcame InuYasha last night but I don't want him thinking he can just meet you here like he use to."

Kagome fell to her knees in front of the tree and guided her hands down the bark, "Got it. I'll be fine Sango. InuYasha isn't around. If Sesshoumaru had one whiff of his scent I doubt he'd let me walk around so freely. I'll make it quick."

It was hard to find something to say, however, as Kagome found it difficult to be sentimental like this. How could she have feelings for a woman she never knew? She knew nothing about her mother's personality or her outlook on life, so having a conversation with a dead stranger seemed very out of place, but the woman supposedly died for her, so Kagome had to say something.

"Hey mom," Kagome kept her words to herself as she continued to keep her fingers trained on the bark, "I'm sure this is stupid isn't it? I don't even know if you are actually here. My father is a liar after all. I can't imagine what it must be like to be one of his wives. Ugh Kikyo did nothing to defend me when I needed someone, but she'll always have my sympathy for- sorry you probably don't care about all of that. If you really did give your life for mine and really are watching over me you must be scared for me. I would be if I had a child like me. I think I'll be okay now though. Sesshoumaru, well Sesshoumaru scares me sometimes, but I think it can work, me being his wife and all. It's so weird actually being accepting of this arrangement now, but he isn't all bad and just because things are going to be new and different doesn't mean I should be afraid. I'm not going to be like that anymore. I want to make the best of things, and maybe one day be someone you'll be proud of."

Kagome really wanted to stay on track and make her peace, but it was hard to not let her thoughts wander to InuYasha. If her mother really could see her in this place then what would she think about how easily she had given up her heart to InuYasha? Was she making the same mistake again with Sesshoumaru? Not that she was exactly giving up her heart, but she was giving up everything else.

"What is with me? I say one thing and then I immediately have doubts. Oh mother please give me strength. I'm not asking for the world to fall into my lap and for the gods to turn Sesshoumaru into the perfect man or anything, I just don't want him to be someone that interferes with me having a full life worth living. InuYasha… you are more than just a mistake to me. You've become my guilt. All my thoughts and feelings towards you turned so bitter so fast when I found out why you visited me so often. It was all about me. I didn't think about you at all did I? What it must have been like to lose your father and be forced to fake an interest in me all while loving my father's wife. I don't know what's happening with you, but if only I'd look passed myself I could've seen how badly you were hurting. I could have been there for you. See mom your daughter is nothing but a selfish screw up. Maybe I don't deserve that worth while life."

"Kagome."

His cold voice put her on notice as she quickly cringed not expecting her husband to seemingly show up out of nowhere.

"No," she closed her eyes, "I'm trying to have some kind of moment in this place. Something meaningful, and now my special place is ruined all because that whole thing with Sesshoumaru and my mouth and his- why am I thinking about that of all things right now?"

"Sesshoumaru," Kagome accidentally answered him back just as coldly while never turning her gaze from the tree, "I apologize. I just needed a moment. It's fine though- I guess. I needed to thank you anyway for-

"Your moment has passed," he interrupted moving swiftly behind her and grabbing her wrist from the tree, "are you prepared to leave? We've wasted enough time in this foul kingdom."

Kagome believed her 'moment' hadn't been as calming and peaceful as she wanted it to be, especially when her thoughts continued to drift back to InuYasha, but anything worth salvaging was gone now. Salvaging had been the action she tried to take by inviting Sesshoumaru into her peaceful introspective world and giving him that gratitude he desired so much for the gift he left her. She wanted him to appreciate that she was trying to have a better attitude about their forced companionship, and dared to expect exactly that. After all it wasn't like he was cold all the time. He could be affectionate when he wanted to. She could still recall her heart pounding when he called her beautiful, but when she turned to face Sesshoumaru no warmth could be found within him.

His eyes bore down on her as though she were doing something wrong while he him himself looked as though he were the one in trouble. The sleeve of his white kimono had been damaged and was seemingly burnt at the edges. Such damage could easily be seen on that of a child with long sleeves that carelessly ran too close to a candle, but on the Daiyoukai Lord Sesshoumaru? No something was wrong.

"What's going on?" she asked him standing up from the ground, "what happened to your sleeve?"

"It is none of your concern," he said matter-of-factly ripping the tainted sleeve from his kimono, "are your accounts settled? We will be on our way then."

"Are yours?" she couldn't help but fire back, "you said I had until the evening and that is how long I need. I still need to pack a few things and say goodbye to Sango. You can't just change the rules on me. What about Rin?"

Sesshoumaru's eyes intensified on her clearly not satisfied with the display of defiance she was still showing, "The flower girl? What of her? That human girl was never to be a concern of yours and now isn't a concern of mine. If Kagura cannot find her shelter she is your kingdom's ward then."

Kagome still didn't know what happend or why Rin was in the castle, but Sesshoumaru was responsible for it. He couldn't just give the girl shelter then throw her back on the streets if that was his intention. No, Kagome needed to figure out what had happened. If Rin was with them because something bad happened to her with her guardian Kagome had herself to blame so letting it go wasn't an option.

"I want to see her and if you won't talk to me about it I'll ask Kagura," Kagome crossed her arms letting Sesshoumaru know she was serious as she leaned against the tree, "you're a demon of your word aren't you? You said I had until nightfall."

Kagome this time was purposely questioning his honor knowing he couldn't usher her out of the kingdom now. Anger flashed in Sesshoumaru's eyes for a moment before something dramatically changed. He went from being irritated to almost smiling. Sesshoumaru had given flashes of smugness before, but rarely outright smiled. What was he smiling about?

Sango, on the other hand, just seemed perplexed about something as she came into Kagome's line of sight.

"Kagome, your eyes!?"

"Hmm?" Kagome turned to her with no way of knowing her eyes had gone from a dark brown to a bright green for only a brief moment, "what about my eyes?"

"Oh?" Sango looked confused again after Kagome's eyes returned to normal, "I must have been mistaken. They looked different in the light for a moment."

Sesshoumaru had smiled only for a moment because that supernatural event was his final confirmation. It didn't matter that Naraku was Kagome's father, or that she had been born dead, and he had no idea why her eyes changed color at that time, but it was clear that there was magic in that girl's blood. Magic that would belong to him.

Sesshoumaru's demeanor quickly returned to that of a scowl as he approached Kagome and roughly tore her from the tree pulling her to his side, "Then you have until night fall and not a minute later. However, you will not leave my sight. Allowing you to be free to your own devices might've been a mistake. I don't smell or sense my brother's power, but it is not safe for you to linger in a place like this with only that maid to protect you. Why are you even here?"

"Don't be so rough!" his wife obviously didn't appreciate being handled that way, "and obviously I wasn't too secluded. You found me after all, but I guess it is cause of that nose of yours."

"I don't require your scent to find you. I will always know where you are. Answer the question, why do you come to this place?"

Another small growl escaped him, "An old scent of my brother lingers here."

"My mother," Kagome quickly said not wanting Sesshoumaru to be aware of how much of her thoughts had been on his brother, "Naraku said her remains are here under the tree. I wanted to say goodbye."

There was no apology for assuming the worse or any further questions. Instead all Kagome got was Sesshoumaru pulling her further away from the tree.

"You said your goodbye. Now let's be on our way back."

Sesshoumaru quickly came up on a theory about how power had temporarily sparked within Kagome assuming her mother's remains might have enchanted the area. Whatever it had been he didn't want his wife further exposed to it. He had his final confirmation and he required no more than that. He didn't believe it was fully within Kagome's right to know his intentions since she'd already learned about the truth behind their arrangement, so he wouldn't admit why he was pulling out her out of the area so swiftly.

He wanted her away from whatever power lingered around them because he believed the magic within her blood was meant only for him for his exploitation. It wasn't for Kagome. If she were going to identify as a human-like creature then she'd be treated as such. He wanted her to mature, but he had no intention of letting her learn of and use her own powers incase they'd one day be used against him.

(End Chapter)