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A Snape/Hermione fic.
Chapter Twenty-Five.
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Disclaimer: See Ch. 1.
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A/N: I am so, SO sorry for the incredibly long wait. Once I get started on a new fandom, it's nearly impossible for me to go back. But, I promise I'll try to finish this fic up soon!
I'll respond to some reviews here:
Nutters4Potter: Hmm ... does Severus know? Hehe ... well, the answer is obvious, but I'll pretend like I'm keeping you in suspense ...
green24: Yes ... definitely thrust in her face. Considering it IS Hermione, she would just have to be confronted with absolute logic, instead of just trusting what she's feeling. Thanks for the review!
kehlencrow: That's probably part of the reason ... we'll have to read more to find out the rest! Thanks for the review!
babyscardinal: Yes! Thank you! That is exactly what I meant it to be when I wrote it! I'm so happy that I didn't have to write an explainer into this chapter! Yes, considering these two, and their ever-logical brains - of course this was the one sure-fire way to get them to see it!
Angie38: Wow ... I'm thrilled that you're enjoying my story that much that you think of it outside of the fanfic realm. Thanks for the review!
Jinxie4: I always love getting new reviewers! I'm happy you're enjoying the story. Don't worry, we will delve a bit more into Samantha's feelings about it all in this chapter. Thanks for the review!
MyCatSammy: I know, I'm sorry for the long wait! I promise I will be finishing this story, hopefully soon!
Everyone else: Thanks for the amazing reviews!
Alrighty, so here's the next chapter. I've given up on my desire to end it on a round number, so it'll probably only be a couple more until the end. But don't worry, I already have the storyline thought out for the sequel, so hopefully it won't be too long until that one's out.
Well, without much further ado ... let's get on with it, shall we?
I hope you guys like this one, I know I'll love writing it.
As always, please read and review, I live for feedback!
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Severus paced back and forth in his rooms, his mind racing and spinning. There must be some other explanation, he reasoned. It's complete and utter madness to think that ... this is merely an infatuation, nothing more. You've been caught up in the romanticism, and let yourself get carried away. There's no need to be foolish, and believe that this is actually ... love.
Severus ran a hand through his hair, resisting the urge to rip the silky tendrils out of his scalp. When had things gotten so complicated?
The second that little girl came trotting out of Hagrid's hut, and called her "Mummy", that's when.
He nearly growled in frustration, thinking back to the weeks before the school year had begun. Would all this be happening if he'd just kept his nose out of her business? If he'd never walked back with them to their rooms, or gone inside to drink juice with Samantha? If he hadn't gotten so damn nosy about finding out what was in that box? If he hadn't used Legilimency to find out who had raped her? If he hadn't tried to bring her parents back into her life, or gone out of his way to be nice to Samantha, or done any of the endless list of things that he'd done since she came back into his life?
He could spend hours asking himself these questions, Severus knew.
To stave off more relentless inner inquiries, he moved into his study and poured himself a large drink. He needed to clear his mind.
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Hermione wandered the halls on her patrol that night, thinking about what Minerva had told her. Already in love? She couldn't fathom it. Not just on her end ... she'd definitely begun to wonder if she was truly in love with Severus Snape, Potions Master, and notorious bat that haunted the dungeons. But for him to be in love with her as well?
It was only a theory, and not the theory of a Potions Master or Mistress ... but it was a sound theory. It was logical.
Even so, she couldn't wrap her mind around it. Severus Snape, in love with her? Why her? What made her so special? Hermione shook her head, turning along the corridor to make a round of the library. It had always brought her so much comfortable and solitude as a student, she hoped it would do the same now.
She thought of her daughter, sleeping soundly in her room, with Dobby watching over her with a proud, puffed out chest. As she moved through the still stacks of the lonely library, she thought of everything that had happened in the last eight months, all leading up to her current situation.
Hermione sighed, fingering the locket that was tucked under her robes. She hadn't been able to bring herself to take it off, even though her relationship with Severus over the past few months had been tense at best.
Samantha was feeling the loss of his presence as well, as he only spoke to her at meals now, and rarely came around their rooms unless it was absolutely necessary. She would break into random crying fits at the most unexpected moments, and it was a nightmare lately to try and get her to eat and go to sleep on time. Dobby would have his hands full tonight.
Hermione trailed her fingers along the spines of each book she passed as she made her way through the stacks, breathing in the glorious smells of paper, ink, and a heavy scent of alcohol.
Hermione frowned, sniffing again at the powerful aroma that was filling the room. Glancing around, Hermione was surprised at what she saw. "What are you doing here?"
Severus glanced around at the sound of her voice, his face falling when he saw that it was her. "Merlin, can I not get one night's respite from your presence?" His eyes rolled up to the heavens, his voice deep and slurred.
Hermione took a step closer, narrowing her eyes. "You're drunk."
"Your powers of observation are extraordinary," he replied dryly, leaning back against the stacks.
Hermione looked all around them, hopeful that there weren't actually any students in the library after hours.
"So, you'll be forcing one of your emotional speeches on me, then?" Severus inquired, pushing himself off the bookshelf he was resting against and stepping towards her. "Tell me how good a man I am, and how my past doesn't matter?"
Hermione turned her head back to look at him, crossing her arms over her chest. "I'm not exactly in the speech-giving mood, Severus."
"That's Professor Snape," he replied, glaring down at her through half-lidded eyes.
"What, asshole was taken?" Hermione bit back.
Severus blinked, staring at her.
"I am so sick of your emotional constipation," she told him, feeling her heart swell with a bravery that she hadn't known was within her. "We both know exactly how you feel about me - and how I feel about you," she added, nearly losing her nerve. "I'm so sorry that it took an exploding potion to open our eyes, but I am not going to apologize for how I feel about you, dammit."
Severus leaned towards her, placing an unsteady hand on the bookshelf nearest to her head. "You shouldn't speak to me like that," he warned her, his face inches from hers.
Hermione flared her nostrils in response, willing herself not to be afraid. If he weren't drunk off his arse, he wouldn't be saying such things to her. "I'm not afraid of you, Severus," she informed him, jutting her chin out defiantly.
Severus's jaw clenched as he stared down at her, breathing the musky scent of stale alcohol through his nose. "Why the bloody hell not? What do I need to do to convince you that I am dangerous?"
Hermione could see where this was going, and refused to give him the leverage. She brought her hands up between them, planting them firmly on his chest, and then shoving him back with all her might. She watched him stumble backwards, his back falling into the shelf behind him. "I know exactly what you're capable of, but you seem to have underestimated me."
Snape felt his watch heating up, and glanced up at Hermione from where he was slumped against the bookshelf. "You're still wearing it."
It took a second for Hermione to realize what he meant. "It was a gift," she replied in explanation, fighting the urge to hold it against her chest. A part of her wondered if he would demand to have it back.
"It was a mistake," he replied, looking down at his feet.
Hermione shook her head, now fighting the tears that threatened to stir up in her eyes. "No, it wasn't. It was you."
"You don't know me that well," he told her.
"I know you well enough," Hermione stated, stepping towards him this time. "I know you better than most people might, and that's what's scaring you. You're afraid of getting close to me, afraid of hurting us ... well, guess what, Severus? You have hurt us. Don't you see what this has done to Samantha? She loves you with her whole heart, and you're breaking it."
"All the more reason why I should stay away," he pushed back, standing up straight.
Hermione shook her head, trying to figure out some other way to get through to him. Her words weren't getting through to him, her gestures weren't getting through to him, spending the last three months in close quarters with him every other day certainly wasn't getting through to him. Sighing, Hermione gritted her teeth and flared her nostrils, breathing heavily. A second later, her hand left her side and struck him flat across his face.
Severus's eyes widened in response, staring down at her with a heated, surprised expression on his usually guarded face.
"Your 'staying away' is what's hurting her, you insufferable, stubborn arse!" she announced furiously. Another slap echoed against his face, as her anger and frustration spurred her on. Hermione wasn't sure how many more hits he would endure before he reacted. "For someone so brilliant, you can be incredibly daft sometimes. I don't want you to climb atop the highest tower and scream your love for us at the top of your lungs! I don't even need you to say it! I just need you to stop pulling away from us for caring about you."
Still he said nothing, just stared down at her.
Hermione nearly snarled in frustration, smacking his sturdy chest with her now fisted hands. "Just say something, dammit!"
Severus allowed her to pound on him for a short while before he stopped her, his hands coming up to grab her wrists. He bit back the urge to tuck the hair that had fallen loose from her bun behind her ear.
Hermione stared up into his eyes, willing him to make some sort of move, while at the same time wishing he would put an end to all of this so that she could move on, and save what was left of her shattered heart.
"Hermione," he spoke slowly, his gaze moving from her lips to her eyes. "I -"
At that moment, Dobby apparated next to them with a sharp pop! "Miss Samantha's a-needing you, Miss Hermione."
Hermione blinked, tearing her eyes away from Severus. She was hyper aware of the position they were in, and pulled her wrists free of his grip, straightening herself up. "What?"
"She's havin' a dreadful fit, she is," Dobby told her. "Screaming and crying, Dobby doesn't know what to do."
Hermione's eyes widened, and she made to leave the library immediately.
Dobby stopped her with a small hand on her leg. "Dobby will get Miss Hermione there faster, he will. And Mister Snape, too."
Before they could say anything, Dobby reached a second hand towards Severus, and with another loud pop! they were gone.
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They arrived in Hermione's rooms a split-second later, where Samantha's cries could be heard instantly. Forgetting about the other two, Hermione rushed into her daughter's room.
Samantha was in the midst of a terrible nightmare, drenched in sweat, tossing and turning in her small bed.
Hermione was at her side in a heartbeat, sliding onto the bed and placing her hands on her daughter's shoulders. "Sammy, wake up," she urged, shaking her shoulders gently.
Samantha's screams only grew louder, her little body fighting whatever terrors had filled her unconscious mind.
Hermione pulled her daughter off the bed, drawing her into her arms and rocking her. "Samantha, it's okay, Sweetie. Come on, wake up," she spoke in a soothing voice, rubbing circles on her back with one hand.
"Mummy!" she cried out, which soon turned into a sob as she started to wake up. Samantha pulled her tear-stained face from her mother's shoulder to look into her eyes. "Mummy, it hurts!" she cried out.
Hermione brushed Samantha's damp hair out of her eyes, frowning down at her. "What hurts, baby?"
Samantha's lip trembled as she pouted. "My ... here," she whimpered, putting a hand on her chest, right above her heart. "It hurts!"
Hermione closed her eyes, pulling her daughter back into her eyes as sadness seeped its way into her own body. "I know, Sweetie. It's okay." She rocked her some more, trying to make her feel better. "What made your heart hurt?" she asked her daughter, knowing the answer.
"I w-was calling to Daddy, but he wouldn't turn - turn around," Samantha told her, her voice breaking with whimpers and heaving breaths. "Why does Severus hate me now, Mummy?"
Hermione opened her mouth to tell her that he didn't, that it wasn't true, but a voice at her door interrupted her.
"I don't hate you, Samantha," Severus told her honestly, standing awkwardly in the doorway.
Samantha blinked her wet, tired eyes at the man, the first time she'd seen him outside of the Great Hall in weeks. "Then how come you left?"
Hermione turned her head to meet Severus's eyes, willing him not to make the situation worse.
Severus sighed, wondering if he would be where he was if he'd taken a bottle of Dreamless Sleep, instead of a bottle of Firewhiskey. "I was ..." he trailed off after a moment, his flight instinct trying to overpower him. "I was ... afraid."
Samantha sniffled, wiping her tears with the back of her sleeved arm. "Afraid?"
Severus nodded.
"Of what?" the little girl wanted to know.
"Of ..." Of what? Of hurting her? Of not being good enough? Of getting hurt? Of screwing things up? Guilty, guilty, guilty, guilty. Severus's thoughts threatened to make him turn heel and run, but he fought it, looking at the small, sad girl in Hermione's arms. "Of getting too close."
"Why?" Samantha asked.
Severus brought a hand to his brow. Should've known she wouldn't make this easy for me. He almost began to wonder if someone had slipped a little Veritaserum into his Firewhiskey, as he was filled with the urge to tell her everything."Because, Samantha ... I -"
Hermione interrupted him, adjusting her daughter in her arms. "Don't say something you're going to regret in the morning," she warned him, determined to protect her daughter from further heartbreak.
The older man pursed his lips, moving his hand to brush his hair out of his face. "Because, I ..." Severus swallowed back the lump that was rising in his throat, never having had so much trouble putting a sentence together. "Because I love you, Samantha. And I didn't want to hurt you."
Hermione's breath caught in her throat, the shock of hearing the words come out of his mouth nearly being too much for her. Samantha remained still in her arms for a long moment, staring back at Severus. The room was filled with an almost unbearable silence.
Severus, convinced that he'd said the wrong thing, shifted uncomfortably. He turned to leave when Samantha's voice halted him in his tracks.
"Wait," she called out, wriggling out of her mother's grasp. Her feet padded against the floor as she traveled across to the doorway, looking up at him. She was hardly a fearsome creature, in her pink, bunny pajamas and large, white slippers, but Severus had never been so worried in his life. She stopped in front of him, raising her hand with her pointer finger sticking out. She curled it, motioning for him to come down to her level.
Severus complied, crouching down slowly.
Once he was at eye-level, Samantha gripped his robes with one hand, clenching her tiny fist around the material tightly. "You did hurt me," she told him, sniffing once for emphasis. "You made me very sad."
Severus nodded apologetically, opening his mouth to voice his regrets, but she silenced him with her next words.
"But, since I love you too, I forgive you," she informed him. Not missing a beat, she leaned forward and pulling him closer at the same time, planting a soft kiss on his cheek.
Severus dropped one knee to the floor to keep his balance, blinking his eyes in surprise.
Samantha turned abruptly, returning to her bed to fetch her mother.
Hermione accepted Samantha's hand in her own, following her daughter to where Severus was standing up.
Samantha gripped his hand too, leading them out of the room. "Come on," she told them simply, heading for Hermione's room.
"Samantha, what are you doing?" Hermione asked, managing to find her voice.
"My bed is too small for all of us," Samantha explained in a matter-of-fact voice, pulling them into the bedroom.
They heard the telltale pop! of Dobby apparating away, leaving the three of them alone.
Samantha tugged them forward until she reached the edge of the mattress, finally letting go of their hands. She jumped up onto the bed from the end, crawling across to the headboard and pulling down the covers. She turned back and looked at them expectantly. "Well? Come on!"
Hermione ignored Severus's pleading looks for an out, sliding her robes off, leaving her in a pair of comfy pants and a t-shirt. She kicked her shoes off by the side of the bed, sliding under the covers next to Samantha.
Samantha smiled softly at her mother, looking expectantly back at Severus. She patted the bed next to her, staring him down.
Severus pursed his lips, flicking off the light in the room with a silent spell. After another moment, he slid off his own robes and shoes, leaving him in his shirt, vest, pants, and socks. He hesitated for another moment before he made his way over to the opposite side that Hermione had went to, next to Samantha. He glanced between the two females before he slid under the covers that Samantha had already pulled back.
Hermione watched silently as her daughter lay tucked between the two of him, her tiny arms wrapped around Severus's larger one, as though to ensure that he couldn't escape again. She lay awake, stroking her daughter's hair a few times. She could see Severus's eyes looking back at her in the dark room, but with Samantha between them, she didn't say anything just yet. She only hoped that he wouldn't regret his decision to stay, come morning.
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End of chapter twenty-five.
Again, I am TERRIBLY SORRY for the long wait, I can't even believe how long it's been since I updated this. I'll do my best to make up for it!
What did you guys think of this chapter? Like it, hate it?
Reviews are appreciated, flame if you must, but constructive criticism is much more useful.
Until next time ...!