Lies of the Soul

~Chapter 24 – Never~

BPOV

Edward didn't move at all during the whole helicopter trip. The paramedics kept working on him so I couldn't be as close as I wanted to be, but I was ok with that. As long as they kept him alive and I could see him and hold his hand, I was ok.

When the copter landed, Edward was rushed in to be examined by the ER doctors.

"Multiple stab wounds to the abdomen, head trauma, dehydration…" The lead doctor started naming off everything that he could see that was wrong with Edward. "I need X-rays and a surgical room ready, stat."

"Miss, you need to wait in the hall," a nurse said to me while I watched intensely as they worked on Edward.

I shook my head. "I need to be here with him," I whispered, unable to speak any louder.

"You need to let the doctors do their job, please don't make me call security," the nurse threatened. I was pissed at first, but I knew she was just following the rules…which pissed me off even more. I hesitantly stepped out of the room but refused to go any further.

"Code Blue, Code Blue!" I heard someone yelling from inside the room. "Clear…..again. Clear…."

My whole body was shaking violently as I realized the very real possibility that Edward might not make it. No, I refused to acknowledge that chance. He made it this long; I had to believe he'd make it the rest of the way. Edward was strong, he would survive, he had to.

A few minutes later, they wheeled him out and started pushing him down the hall, so I followed.

"We're taking him into surgery. He lost a lot of blood and needs a transfusion. Please call all his family for donations," the RN said as we walked at a brisk pace.

When we got to the surgical room, I squeezed his hand before they shut me out. I felt completely helpless and alone. I hated waiting, I felt like I should be doing more to fight for him, but there was nothing to do. Edward's only biological family was Benny, who was too young to be a donor, and his father.

So I called Mr. Masen. "Edward is in serious condition, he needs a blood transfusion."

"I'm coming," was all he said before the phone went dead. Since Mr. Masen was a cancer survivor, I wasn't sure if they'd allow him to donate, but either way, I felt like I needed to tell him about Edward regardless.

Ten minutes later, Emmett and Charlie came rushing down the hall to meet me.

"How is he?" Emmett asked frantically.

I shook my head. "I don't know. He's in surgery, but they haven't told me anything. They said he was stabbed and he lost a lot of blood, but other than that," I shrugged as I fought back the tears. I couldn't lose it; I needed to be strong for Edward.

Charlie wrapped his arms around me comfortingly, and held me for a few moments. "He'll be ok. That boy is a fighter; he's going to make it. We have to have faith."

I nodded and Charlie let me go, before turning away and whipping his face. I knew he didn't want Em and I to see him crying, so I pretended not to notice. Emmett didn't cry, but his face was white with worry and the color didn't seem to be returning anytime soon.

"How's James?" I asked after awhile. I felt so bad for him, his father was a lunatic and we had no idea the extent of the torture he endured over his lifetime. After I was sure Edward was stable, I planned to go see how he was doing.

"He seems ok. He's got a lot of surface wounds, and maybe some broken bones. I think he has a collapsed throat pipe and that's why he couldn't really speak, but he should be fine in a few days," Emmett explained James's condition to me.

"God, I can't believe his father tried to kill him and Edward. He really is crazy. I can't really blame him for the mean stuff he did as a kid after seeing the piece of work that his father is."

"James hasn't been the most stand up of a guy either though Bella, I wouldn't feel too sorry for him if I was you," Charlie rebutted.

"Yeah, but….man, having a parent like that."

"Oh, give me a break," Emmett argued. "You had a crazy ass mother, and you didn't turn out like that. Edward's dad wasn't much better than James's Sr. either."

"Yeah, but Edward and I had you guys for stability. Who did James have? No one."

I never thought I'd be defending James, but I couldn't help it. He was a gay man who bullied others because his father was a lunatic. Edward had less than superb behavior for a while too, and if Emmett and Charlie hadn't stepped in, who knows how Edward would have turned out.

Edward's dad arrived, and as feared, he wasn't allowed to donate because of his medical history, so I started to panic.

"But he's his only blood relative who's older than a year."

"We're just going to have to use a non-related donor," the nurse said. We all took turns going to the lab to donate, but none of us were matches. Luckily, Edward had a fairly common blood type and they were able to find a match quick enough.

Edward's father didn't say much, but the stress on his face matched my own father's and I knew he was terrified. He wasted so much time being drunk that I wondered if their relationship was beyond repair. I really hoped not, if only for Edward's sake; carrying around that much anger wasn't good for anyone. They didn't have to be super close, but some cordial politeness would make a huge difference.

An hour later, the doctor came out.

"How is he?" I asked before he had a chance to talk.

"He was stabbed three times, which we were able to repair with no lasting damage. Thankfully the knife missed all his major organs. We're treating him for dehydration. But our biggest concern is that he's had a lot of trauma to his head, and the untreated concussion has caused a lot of swelling in the brain. We need to remove a piece of the skull to allow the brain to not crush itself, and we also need to keep him in a medically induced coma until he has a chance to heal."

"Is there brain damage?" Emmett asked the question that I was too afraid to ask.

"It's too soon to know the extent of any permanent damage, but he is having a lot of brain activity at the moment, which is why we need to keep him unconscious. We need to make his brain work as little as possible until he's had time to heal and get back to any level of normal functioning. Now, medically induced comas and removal of part of the skull are huge surgeries, so we'll need consent."

I nodded. "Ok, where do I sign?" I asked knowing without a doubt that Edward needed to surgery.

"Are you his wife?" the doctor asked.

"…No," I said quietly, taken by surprise. I knew only legally documented family could sign for patients when they couldn't sign for themselves, but I guess I never really thought about it. Edward and I were each other's family, and I never realized how important getting married really was.

"I'm his father," Mr. Masen stood and said.

"Legally?"

"Yes Sir."

"Ok, follow Nurse Jackie and she'll get you all the necessary paperwork."

I felt sick as Mr. Masen disappeared around the corner. It just wasn't right. Edward had never had a real relationship with his father, and he and I were everything to each other, but I couldn't sign anything on his behalf.

"I guess you should have married him when he asked," Emmett said quietly. Charlie hit him in the back of the head. "What?" he asked confused.

"She's upset enough, she doesn't need that shit from you," Charlie scolded him.

"No dad, he's right. I was so stupid to put it off because I was worried about something tearing us apart again. And now look, we're apart and I can't do anything because we're not married." I started crying at the end. I had tried to remain in control, but I just completely lost it. I realized then that they didn't even have to let me in the ICU to see him when he was out of the surgery either. My feeling of helplessness grew tenfold, and I just felt so lost.

I walked down the hall in the waiting area so I could call Rose. I just needed to hear Benny's voice, even if he didn't really say much.

"Come here Benny, mommy is on the phone," Rose said and I could hear her running after my son, trying to get him to talk to me.

"AHEH!" I heard Benny scream.

"It's ok, Rose," I said disappointed.

"Sorry, I was just about to put him down for his nap."

"How is he doing?"

"He's ok. He's been saying 'Ma' and 'Da' a lot, but I've been trying to keep him busy. Alice and Jasper are here. They wanted to go down to the hospital to see you guys, but I thought it might get too crowded so I convinced them to wait here until you say it's ok."

"Thanks Rose, that's a good idea."

"Benny loves the extra company, but Alice keeps arguing with me over little ways that I'm caring for him. She's driving me insane, I have no idea how I came to be best friends with her…Sorry, Bella. I know you don't need to know about this shit right now. How are you holding up?"

"It's ok, I'm actually glad to hear about it, something to get my mind off everything, even just for a few minutes. I'm doing as well as possible given the circumstance, I just really hate this."

"I know, hang in there. Edward is going to be ok, he's a fighter."

He's a fighter, he's a fighter, everyone kept saying that, even I said it a few times, but truthfully isn't that what everyone said about people who were in life threatening situations? What if Edward wasn't a fighter; or maybe he just had enough fighting and was too tired to continue. How would I survive without him again?

Every hour seemed to drag on for an eternity, and yet it seemed like it had only been a moment since we found him in the muddy ditch. Eventually, the doctor came back out.

"Everything is going as expected. He'll be moved to the ICU momentarily."

"So, he's going to be ok?" I asked hopefully.

"We won't know if he'll be able to make a full recovery until he actually wakes up. We need to keep him in a coma for at least three days, and then if everything looks good at that point, we'll slowly bring him out of his coma."

"Thanks Doctor," I said.

They wheeled Edward past us, and if I didn't know it was him, I wouldn't have recognized him. His head was wrapped and covered; in fact, most of him was covered. Once again, I followed, but I wasn't allowed to go far.

"Only family members are allowed past visiting hours in the ICU."

And then I broke down again. "No please, I am his family. He'd want me with him, I can't leave," I cried.

"Wait here, I'll go see what I can do," the nurse said.

After a few minutes, the nurse returned with someone who I never would have expected.

"Laurent?" I asked surprised and a little afraid. The last time I saw him, he tried to tie me to the school flag pole.

"It's good to see you again Ben," he said casually. I guess gossip really did get around.

"Bella," I corrected quietly.

"That's right; I did hear that, I'm sorry. Well, since I'm the hospital director, Nurse Kate asked if I'd OK you staying with Mr. Masen."

"Can you?" I asked hoping he matured over the years and didn't let out past influence his decision.

"Well the rules specifically state only legal relatives can stay past visiting hours, but given your history, I'd say that you're the closest relative he has, so I think we can make an exception."

"Seriously?" I asked with a mix of relief and paranoia. Was he being serious, or was he messing with me? If it were ten years ago, I would have definitely thought he was messing with me, but thankfully we both seemed to have become different people since then.

"Go right ahead," he said with a warm smile.

I almost hugged him…almost. Instead I settled for a sincere "Thank you."

"I know this doesn't make up for anything that happened in the past, but I hope it's a start," he said suddenly.

I didn't know how to respond, so I just nodded and then hurried to the ICU.

The night past slowly, and the morning came even slower. I spent the hours just listening to the beeping of his heart-rate monitor, and the sound of the breathing machine forcing air in and out of his lungs. I was given a cot, but it was horribly uncomfortable, not that I planned on sleeping anyway.

But surprisingly, I did sleep. The past few days had been exhausting, and having Edward as safe as possible in the moment right next to me, I couldn't help but let sleep overtake me. I was vaguely aware of the doctors and nurses coming in periodically, but I didn't fully wake until the next morning when Charlie and Emmett showed up.

"Hey kiddo, why don't you go home for a while and get cleaned up," Charlie suggested.

"No, I'm not leaving him."

"Bells, you're filthy and he's in a medically induced coma. There's no chance he'll wake before you get back. He won't even notice you're gone," Emmett reasoned.

I realized that I was still covered in dried mud and blood from when I held Edward after they pulled him out of the ditch. I really didn't care how I looked, but I didn't want Edward waking up to me dirty and smelly, so I reluctantly agreed to go home. Em and Charlie promised to stay with him until I got back, so I was slightly comforted by that fact.

Charlie gave me his car keys since I didn't have my car with me at the hospital, but on my way out, I passed by the recovery wing and I felt like I had to go in. We had no idea what really happened at the cabin before I got there, all I knew was that James was messed up pretty bad, and his psycho father pulled a knife on me. James Sr. said that his son was on the right path as an exterminator and doing well, so I was convinced that he was just as much of a victim as Edward was.

But still, I didn't know how happy he'd be to see me; even though he saw me in the cabin, I wasn't sure how lucid he was at that time. I hesitantly peeked inside his room, not wanting to wake him if he was sleeping, but he was already awake.

"What the hell are you doing here?" he asked me bitterly.

"Uh…I…just wanted to see if you were ok. You seemed pretty messed up at the cabin."

"Yeah, well that'll happen when you're almost killed by your father," he said coldly.

"Well, he was treated and taken to jail, so you don't have to worry about him anymore."

James' face distorted in a strange way that was a mix of a relieved smile and a cruel smirk, and suddenly I became even more uncomfortable than I was before.

"Ok, well, I should be going," I said as I turned towards the door realizing how stupid I was for going there.

"Is Edward awake yet?" He asked before I was able to make it all the way out.

"No, his in a medically induced coma."

He laughed once. "He doesn't remember you, you know."

I turned back to him confused, despite the fact that my head was screaming at me to leave.

"What do you mean?"

"When Riley took him from that street around the corner from your house, he hit him in the back of the head with a fucking baseball bat. When he woke up in the cabin, he couldn't remember you, well at least not like this. The last thing he knew of you was when we were in high school." The smirk on his face was sadistic but for some reason, I believed him.

Without even thinking, I ran back to the ICU and demanded to see Edward's doctor. I explained what James said, and the doctor nodded.

"Full or partial amnesia is always a concern with head injuries. Most of the time it's temporary, but it can be permanent. He had a lot of trauma to his brain, and that with the blood loss, I wouldn't be surprised that it would have a long term affect on him. But like I said before, we won't know until he wakes up. Go home, shower, get something to eat, and later this afternoon we need to put him back in surgery to replace the piece of skull we had to remove."

"So the swelling has gone down?" I asked hopefully.

"Yes, he's recovering quickly and I'm confident he'll be ready to be brought out of the coma in the next couple of days."

"Thanks doctor."

Being at home was bittersweet. I missed Benny so much and I loved being able to hold him, but my mind never left Edward. What if he didn't remember me past high school? How would I be able to get through all that anger and resentment again, especially since we have Benny now to consider? I knew couldn't handle seeing anymore hatred in his eyes directed towards me.

I was home longer than I anticipated because Benny didn't want to let me go. Alice and Rose did their best to distract him, and Jasper came with me back to the hospital. I felt horrible for tricking Benny into letting me leave, but Edward was due back in surgery and I had to be there for that.

Jasper and Emmett seemed to be happy to see each other, which was nice to see. In a way, they had been close to Edward as an adult the longest; the three of them were like brothers, and I knew it was hard for them as well.

After his surgery, he was brought back to the ICU, where he'd stay until he was healed enough to be brought out of his coma. Two more days passed, and the doctors decided he was finally able to be brought out of his coma.

As they took him off the medication that kept him asleep, I suddenly became terrified. There was a small chance that he'd never wake up and never be able to breathe on his own, but the doctor assured me that it was a very small chance. I knew he'd wake up, and I knew he'd make a full recovery, but I didn't know what state he'd be in when he first opened his eyes. They said it would be around six hours before he was able to wake on his own, so all we could do was wait. It felt like I had been doing nothing but waiting for so long, since he first disappeared, but at least the end was finally in sight.

Six hours, fourteen minutes, and twenty one seconds later, Edward started to stir.

"I shouldn't be here," I said quietly and then let go of his hand and practically ran out of the room.

"Hey, what's going on?" Charlie asked as I darted past him.

"He's waking up," I said in a panic.

"Well, that's a good thing honey."

I shook my head. "If he doesn't remember anything past high school, then he's going to look at me and freak out. His best friend in drag."

"But, you're not in drag," Charlie said confused.

"But that's what he's going to think. I don't want him to freak out when he first opens his eyes and sees me as…me," I said, pointing to my girly top and skinny jeans. Since being with Edward, I actually enjoyed dressing really feminine, I was even starting to like heels, but at the moment, I wished I had worn one of Edward's shirts and tied my hair in a tight ponytail.

"Look, you need to get back in there. Emmett and I will go in too if you want, that way he can see us first and we'll know how much he remembers."

I nodded. "That's a good idea."

The three of us went back into the room, and even though his eyes were still closed, it was obvious that he was close to waking. Charlie and Emmett sat close to his head, and I hovered in the back; close enough that I could see him, but far enough that he wouldn't completely freak out if he didn't remember me.

My heart was beating a mile a minute and I was on the verge of a panic attack. It took every last ounce of will power for me not to grab him and lock my lips to his permanently, but I had to remain in control. I made the mistake of not giving him time to accept the truth before, and I couldn't do that again.

Suddenly, he moaned. His head started moving from side to side as if he was having a bad dream, and ever so slowly, he finally opened his eyes. I hated not being the first person he saw, but in that instance, it was for the best.

"Hey bro, welcome back," Emmett said with a huge grin.

"You're in the hospital," Charlie explained warmly. "You gave us quite a scare there."

"What…where?" Edward said groggily as he looked around the room. I knew his throat must have hurt from having the tube down it, but more than anything, he just looked confused.

"Do you remember what happened in that cabin?" Charlie asked him.

Edward looked back at him, and nodded, but then he started scanning the room again until his eyes found me. He stared at me blankly for a long endless minute, and then his face stretched out into the biggest grin I ever saw on him before.

"Hey baby," he croaked, and I immediately started crying. I was vaguely aware that Emmett and Charlie quietly left the room, but all I could really see was Edward looking lovingly back at me. I gently but eagerly kissed his lips as my tears fell on his cheeks and down his neck.

"God, I was so worried about you," I whispered and brought his hand up to my face so I could kiss his knuckles and fingers.

"I was worried about you too. Did he hurt you? They said you were coming, and I tried to fight back but…" he had to take a deep breath in order to continue. It was clear just how hard he had to work at getting the words out, but he didn't stop trying. "I wasn't strong enough."

"Oh baby, you were plenty strong enough. You made it, you stayed alive until we found you, and that's all that matters."

I pressed his hand to my cheek, and he started moving his thumb to trace my lips.

"I was so scared I'd never see you again," he said no louder than a breath.

"We're together again, everything is fine now."

The doctor came in and checked his eye dilation, reflexes, and all his vitals, and then we were alone again.

He spent the next couple days doing a lot of sleeping and not much talking as his brain and body were trying to recoup. After he was deemed to be stable, they moved him to recovery, and thankfully, James was close to being released. The police came and asked Edward for a statement, and as I was listening to his story, I couldn't help but be stunned.

"So, James was really behind your kidnapping?" I asked him after the police left.

"Yeah, although I probably could have gotten away from him eventually if his demented father didn't show up."

I felt like an idiot. I was actually feeling sorry for James, but he was the one who was behind everything.

"James said you had amnesia?" I asked after Edward got settled in his new room.

He shook his head. "No, I faked it," he said while looking at me intensely. "When I first woke up there, my head hurt so bad that I couldn't think and I was really confused, but I figured it out soon enough. I just didn't know what he wanted or what he had planned, and when he mentioned you, I just reacted. I thought he was pissed at me for whatever reason, so I pretended to not remember you in the hope that he'd leave you alone. When I realized that he was really pissed because we came back to town as a couple, I was already too deep into the amnesia thing to change my story, not that the truth would have changed anything anyway, they guy was seriously fucking bonkers."

"I was so worried that you forgot the past eight years and we'd have to start over again. I just didn't know how to…" I didn't realize that I was crying again, but Edward reached his hand up and wiped the tears away. I leaned into his touch, so he pulled me forward and into the bed with him.

"Baby, I'd never forget you. Never," he pulled me in even closer so he could kiss me, and I welcomed his lips with the assurance that everything was going to be OK.

*FYI, even when I was writing the last chapter, I knew he was faking it so I was very careful with his internal dialogue. He was vague with his thoughts, which was done purposefully. I wanted Bella to really believe that Edward wasn't going to remember her, and in order to do that effectively, I needed the reader to be unsure. I hope it worked.

Again, I don't work in the medical field so I only go off of what little internet research I can find in a short amount of time, and my own imagination. If anything was wrong, please dismiss it and allow me a little creative freedom. If I was publishing this, I'd spend more time on making sure everything is accurate, but everyone seems to like the quick updates, so there's no time for in-depth studies on the subject.

One chapter left. Please Review.