She is alive

Chapter 25

"Miroku has been a doll, cooking, and cleaning. Taking care of everything while I do my school work" Sango said after taking a sip of her spiked warm cider.

They finally found a time to get together, Sango was swamped with finals, so despite the less than ideal weather they decided to meet at a cozy bar downtown to get a real break from routine.

"Aww you guys are too sweet" Kagome took a small sip of her whiskey letting it warm her from the inside. "He is racking up those brownie points towards fatherhood, huh"

"Kags, he used to ask all the time, he doesn't anymore but I can see the question in his eyes. He wants kids so bad. He casually places a hand on my lower belly and fuses over nutrition. It kills me to keep saying no"

"Honey, why don't you say yes then?"

"Timing is not right. I have to finish school and then there the whole start-a-new-business deal, not to mention how our lives take a turn for the dangerous in a blink"

"Timing will never be perfect, you guys are a loving strong couple, having the child you both want will only make you stronger" her voice wavered a little and Sango held her hand, she dismissed her friend's concern with a shake of her head. "You will be an awesome mom, school and work will never take away from that. If that baby comes and you don't want to split your time, then go back to school later, that will be there and Miroku will always have your back no matter what choice you make"

"I know," Sango said drying her tears before they had a chance to fall

"You are scared and it makes total sense after what happened to your family, but this baby will be loved and safe, it will have all of us to protect it. A kick-ass mom and a strong ass auntie"

They shared a long teary hug. The words echoed in Kagome's head, she was afraid too. Being guarded and defensive with Sesshomaru instead of enjoying their time together. She pushed Sango squeezing her shoulders "Now, no more weepy talk. Tell me how you slayed those finals"

"I totally did Kagome!" Sango said with a smile. "It comes easy to me, second nature really when I relate it to my family's training. I think I could handle an extra class next semester"

"You go girl!" the clinked their glasses in a cheerful toast.

"Enough about me. Tell me how things are going for you"

"A little busy planning for New Year's. I got caterers and waiters lined up and getting quotes for decorations and fireworks...you think is too much?" Kagome asked suddenly hesitant. "I kinda feel it is, it will be only us there….but it is New Years so is ok?" she finished lamely.

"Not at all honey, It was a good year. We are ending and starting on a good note, we have plenty of reasons to celebrate"

Kagome blushed faintly "You are right. I'm excited for Rin, I'm not sure she has ever seen anything like it, I can't wait to see her reaction"

"You have fallen hard for that child, haven't you?" Sango said with amusement.

"Is impossible not to. She is the sweetest, and her innocence is endearing. She is also smart and perceptive. Beautiful little thing" Kagome said dreamily.

"And what of her lord?" Sango met Rin a handful of times, besides the cuteness factor, she was amazed at her devotion to Sesshomaru.

Kagome rested her head on the back of her seat and closed her eyes " Sesshomaru is...perfect"

Sango was confused when the statement, full of longing, was punctuated by a sniffle.

"Somehow he manages to be the sexy confident beast of old, wrapped in a fucking bow of tenderness and regret. He looks surprised every time I approach him, sometimes when we kiss it feels like he is going to collapse in awe. He thinks I'm going to fade away, he is just starting to believe I'm real"

"Wow" Sango knew Sesshomaru cared, but hearing this side of him was a big disconnect from the aloof attitude everyone associated to the demon.

"Wow is right, and don't get me started with sex. He trembles under my hand, his touch is reverent, he fucks me as if I am the most precious thing in the universe"

"Sounds divine," she said and then noticed Kagome's downcast eyes"...unless that is not what you want"

"I'm not made of stone, is fucking amazing...but what I want has never made a difference," She said releasing a big sigh. "This responsibility is mine for good and that has always come first even if I want it or not, my choices are not my own"

Sango wanted to ask more, but Kagome stalled her attempt by asking for the check, clearly not ready to talk about it.