The Isle

by puzzlepuzzle

In the aftermath of the Second War, Athrun Zala vanished without a trace for seven years - Cagalli never thought to find him. But fate deviates when he comes to find her himself and a web of desire and deceit lies before them. Original Cover Art SEQUEL OUT. .

25. Chapter 24

Disclaimer: I own nothing of GS/GSD. R&R please.

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Chapter 24

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The time sped by as the world continued within and outside the Isle. As winter grew deeper and the snow fell more insistently, Cagalli knew that another month had nearly passed.

The time was slipping from her hands and often, she wondered why she couldn't change that. Why had she worked so hard in the past, and who had she been working for, when all she wanted was to be with someone who was so beyond her reach at times?

The air had grown frostier and sometimes, she would wake Athrun in delight and tell him to see the snowflakes that had imprinted themselves on the glass. If he could, they'd spend their time looking out of those windows, tracing pictures on the misty glass, laughing at the childish drawings that Athrun tended to end up with despite his best efforts to sketch a cat or even a fish.

Sometimes, Cagalli would be seized by a melancholy she couldn't understand, and she would wait for him to return, sitting by the window.

But even as she thought about all that she'd been through, the scenery outside the window would change from day to night and back to day quite inevitably, and all she could do was to beg Athrun to spend more time with her when he returned. He would smile at her and never make promises, for they both knew that he could scarcely keep them even now.

The only currency she could spend was her affection, for she did not have the luxury of time anymore. For Cagalli, she did not want to be conscious of how desperately she was living. She did not want to be aware of the time that was running out, and for that simple reason, Cagalli found herself wanting to be with Athrun at every second of the day.

For Athrun however, he had to be.

He took her to a few more parties despite the lack of any particular instructions coming from the Numbers. It wasn't that he was beginning to look forward to these. In fact, he had long learnt how to derive a kind of twisted pleasure in carrying out his duties while pretending to be another person at one point in the past.

But the pleasure he derived had nothing to do with his initiative to socialize, and Cagalli seemed to be the center of the enjoyment he experienced. Bringing Lyra to those in the past had consisted of him trying to get information the Eyes could use, or forging in contacts that would let him acquire the companies the Eyes needed.

Cagalli wasn't there for that.

Cagalli was there to accompany him, and he knew he did not want to be anywhere without her. He chose things for her to wear, and she would put those on and smile at him. Their trips out of the Isle to different Isle-dwellers' places still featured the blindfold over her eyes, but Cagalli did not care anymore. At least she knew the reason why the blindfold was a necessity, and all that really mattered was that Athrun was next to her.

Even when they'd returned from Rochester's, he knew that Cagalli wanted to meet Sundae Guildstern and Eshe Jupitar once more. When Lord Tessington had thrown another party, he'd brought Cagalli there, where she could meet with the new friends she'd made. While they had danced and laughed and made merry, Athrun would sit. He would sit there, watching them, watching the world and wondering how nearly seven years had passed by with crawling and how nearly six months had ran past them all.

His work was getting more difficult. Greyfriars was having trouble with rallying his supporters together, and Athrun had to convince them that Greyfriars was doing the right thing by waiting until the six months were about to be over before killing the captive publicly.

Where the Eyes were concerned, Athrun found himself in a tenser situation than before. Alstarice had always been openly against him, but he found himself fighting back one day.

The fight had started in Orlick Churchill's stronghold, right after they'd reported to the Numbers. The Numbers had praised Athrun in particular and Alstarice had been rather upset about that.

In that very hour, Alstarice Krieg had collected his things after the meeting and swept past Athrun, saying abrasively, "You shouldn't have been the one to meet the captive that night."

Sheba Velasco had held her hand up to stop Alstarice from marching off. "What are you saying, Alstarice? Are you saying that he didn't do well?"

"Yeah," Tom Edgeworth and Barnett Romia had chimed in, ready to stand up for the Fifth Eye.

"Is there some dissatisfaction you feel at the job Rune Estragon has been performing so far?" Leopold Wasser had questioned. He had still been leaning back on his chair, as was his perennial habit. "If you want to criticize, you better make it constructive."

"I'll say it if you all are chickens anyway," Alstarice had snapped, slamming down his file. He whirled to Athrun, who'd been watching quietly, and pointed his finger threateningly at him. "He's incompetent, that's what! The goons who brought him here to the Isle or even sent him on any mission at one point of time should have been shot!"

"What?" Lent Mortimer had leapt to his feet, except that Athrun had pulled him back down. "How dare you-,"

Alstarice had prowled over, leaning one hand irreverently as he'd tried to stare Athrun down. "You think it's a matter of you being a hot-shot that got you to this place? This is a place where a thousand Zaft soldiers would fight to go to if they knew it existed! But you, here? An Eye? No way, man. I can tell you that you don't deserve to be here even to serve as an aide. When I knew that you were the one who was going to be sent to fetch the Orb Princess back here, I knew it was a screwed-up mission. And I was right!" He had laughed loudly and accusingly. "You didn't even manage to get her here in one piece, and even now, you're still fighting to control her!"

He had jabbed a finger in the direction of the screen, where the Numbers' images had materialized just minutes ago. "I say it's one huge smokescreen you've thrown over their eyes, Estragon. You're not exactly fit to be here on the Isle, let alone getting the beefy roles and holding onto the captive. If you're having so much trouble getting her to stay in the manor without you bringing her out and trying to make her calm down, as you've said just now, then why not hand her over to someone else?"

Athrun had narrowed his eyes but said nothing.

Lent had frowned and then shook his head. "What would you suggest then, Alstarice? That he use force on her to make her stay?"

"Hey, if that's what it takes, that's what it takes." Alstarice had shrugged. "It's not as if she's ugly like Tom's dog or anything- ,"

Tom had glowered at him. "You leave Boarbaki out of this."

"Hey, whatever," Alstarice had shrugged again. "All I'm saying is that she's not worth very much, nor is the Fifth Eye, so putting these two in some two-bit operation is really a path towards suicide. I don't see why the Numbers or all you people don't see it."

"You say Rune's not doing a good job of controlling her," Sheba had spoken dangerously. "So what's your suggestion?"

"You could do with making her listen to you by seducing her and getting laid if you're lucky." Alstarice had peered over at Athrun. "Come to think of it, is that what you've been doing recently? Is that why you've been skipping as many meetings as you can?"

Tom's fist had met Alstarice's before Athrun's could. As Alstarice had stumbled back, Tom had used a few classic features of his vocabulary. "Fuck off, you bitch!"

The day had ended with a few people getting scratched and Alstarice suffering a black eye.

Athrun decided to reserve comment.

In the meantime, he took long swims with Cagalli in the day when the water was warmer. They would explore the manor like children, hiding from each other and then springing out from nowhere to shock the other person. Cagalli still trained with them, and Athrun knew she was improving faster than he'd expected.

At night, he sometimes had to leave for business, and she'd reluctantly see him off. But on other days and at other times, they had an uninterrupted period of time together, and the weeks seemed to be complete without her being able to ask for anything more.

At points, Cagalli would wake up to find herself in tears, but she was always comforted by the thought or presence of him. She would wake herself with her crying, or Athrun would be the one to wake first and shake her to let her escape her nightmares. She would try to wipe those tears away, ashamed of her dreams, ashamed of her weaknesses.

He would let her do what she wanted, giving her that last of her dignity, but he would not say anything.

Instead, he would only hold her quietly, never asking what she had been dreaming of, never questioning why she was crying, only comforting her without asking for anything in return. In his arms, she would fall asleep again, although it would hurt her more if she woke and found that he'd had to leave for business once more.

He never demanded to know what she imagined in her sleep, but Cagalli knew what she had dreamt of.

She dreamt of Orb, her office, that empty house, with Aaron and his niece rushing over to have dinner with her because they felt sorry for her. She dreamt of a path that only her car would use as she entered the heavily guarded, automated gates of the estate. She dreamt of a room on the second level of the house- a room that had been locked for a long time because nobody had used it since Alex Dino had left for the Second War.

She dreamt of Kira and Lacus ignoring her when she requested to carry her nephew. She dreamt of Kira shaking his head, asking her why she'd done everything she had found necessary. She dreamt of Lacus, who had given birth but had somehow become weak and wan from it. She dreamt of her friend begging her to return, and she dreamt that she had refused, and she dreamt that the room Athrun had locked her in a long time ago had become something she couldn't recognize anymore.

She dreamt of bloodstains on a silver-white dress and a ring that didn't seem to belong to her as she tried to fit it on her finger but failed each time. She dreamt of Meyrin's eyes on her at Lacus' wedding, and she dreamt that she was smiling and trying to be strong. She dreamt of violets at Lacus' wedding and the rain pouring. She dreamt of a mirror she looked into and her soaking in the bath and then she dreamt that she had drowned by holding her breath for too long and trying to remember something that she couldn't.

She dreamt of Shinn asking her why there were no servants in her house, and she dreamt of him telling her that he pitied her. She dreamt of someone holding her, someone pushing her away when she tried to open her eyes, and she dreamt of Athrun leaving.

But she never told him, because he didn't need her to say it for him to understand.

And so they lived from day to day, smiling with the best of their wills, laughing with all the energy they could muster, trying to have every moment that they possibly could with each other before the hourglass was finally filled.

---

Cagalli's eyes were closed as she lay on her stomach, but he could sense that she was smiling.

With her, Athrun could forget about the day's schedule very easily. He could forget who he had to meet and what he had to do.

He could forget himself.

She rolled over, smiling still and her eyes blinking as they adjusted towards him. He leaned over her, watching her colored a little, her lips parting as she whispered, "What time is it now?"

"I don't know." He answered honestly.

But then, Athrun realized, this wasn't new to him where she was concerned.

Athrun had been prepared to forgo his duties to Plant and Greyfriars the night he reappeared to Cagalli. Bringing Cagalli to the Isle had just not been part of his own plans. He had wanted to flee with her, just so she could be truly safe.

He'd thought that he couldn't bring her to the Isle where she'd definitely be trapped in a manor even while he fulfilled his duties to Zaft. Nor had Athrun want to hand her to the terrorists- they wanted to publicly use her as their sacrificial lamb and pawn.

More importantly and even more selfishly, Athrun hadn't wanted her to see what he'd become.

It hadn't mattered that Greyfriars would have been most certainly killed by the very people he'd led. There had been a significant number of those who'd grown impatient with him and his trust in Rune Estragon. It hadn't mattered that Greyfriars might have found out what he was planning and have killed him for it.

At that time, it had also mattered little that Athrun had been promised the freedom he'd wanted for so long. Plant and Zaft had held that out as a carrot, and they'd told him that seeing this final task to its end would allow him to leave the Isle and go wherever he wanted.

What was freedom anyway? What did he want to be free from?

Athrun found himself wondering about his duties and questioning himself even as he lay next to Cagalli, feeling her face rub in his shoulder, her hands clinging to him and the sheets protective along with the hanging bed curtains that formed their cocoon.

They'd washed up together, with her promising to have a few more hours of sleep even after he'd left.

She had watched him dress and she had even taken out a tie for him. But he'd pulled her to the bed, sitting both of them down. That had been the first mistake.

He'd taken her face in his hands and kissed her to signal that he'd be back soon. That had been the second mistake.

She'd looked at him trustingly and he had felt something stir in him and known that the only way to prevent his staying on had been to separate them. But he hadn't. That had been the third mistake.

They'd ended up wrestling and tussling in bed because she'd cracked a joke he should have merely smiled at and not responded to. That had been the fourth mistake.

And there was Cagalli, and he'd found himself wanting to stay with her.

That was a mistake he had come to accept.

He hadn't wanted to stay around to laze the morning away with her for today. He had so much to do, and so much was being demanded of him. But Cagalli had woken up with him this morning, and she'd put her arm around him, begging him to let her send him off. When he'd tried to leave her, she'd begged him to stay for another minute and he had.

The minute had turned into an hour, and Athrun was quite sure that it would take another one for him to get up and out of there. She had mentioned how mornings in Orb were always very quiet, and that the roads were less dusty and the dewy air much nicer than when she came home in the evening or night. In return, he'd told her about the Plants, where everything seemed sterilized, no matter how much mud the children rolled in.

"I used to roll around in the mud too," Cagalli told him amusedly. "I ruined quite a few things by hanging around in the mud and near the stream in the estate. We'd meet there and play catching or hide and seek in the woods until one of us had to leave. The maids used to get upset when I came back from a wrestling match with the other servants' children."

He laughed. "Victorious, I suppose?"

"Sometimes. But not always. The cook's eldest boy was a bit of a sly one."

"Oh?" Athrun said, his lips twitching. "When was that ever an issue? I heard from Kira that when you went back to Orb during the Second War, you convinced-,"

Cagalli grimaced, holding up a hand as she buried her face in the sheets. "Let's not talk about me tricking and then punching the lights out of Yuuna Roma Seiran. He was a useless goon that really got on my nerves because he was so useless. Not just irritating, Athrun, I can deal with annoyance and nuisance. But worse- he was useless!"

"I surmised as much." He said wryly. He thought of the way the Seiran Emir had commanded the Orb troops and wondered if Yuuna Roma Seiran hadn't been present on the day that God had given out good brains and good luck.

"When I was thirteen, I was thrilled when my father informed me he was going for further studies." Cagalli informed him. "I told my father that the further away, the better it was for all of us. Turned out he went to Paris, and he ended up even stranger than before."

Athrun chuckled. "I bet you were disappointed that he didn't stay in France for the rest of his life."

"Of course. He loved to show off his French when he returned," She grimaced again. "Which coincidentally, I was rather bad in. I still am, actually."

"Maybe it's a blessing I didn't ever manage to bring you to the house in France." He said cheerily. "Although I think you'd have liked Mont Pellier."

"Mont Pellier?" She turned over to lie on her stomach as they lay liked lazy seals on the still-warm sheets, her eyes widening. "That's the South, right? Not where the house is in Lyon."

"You're right. Mont Pellier is next to the sea," Athrun looked relaxed and his voice dipped low as he buried his face in the sheets, breathing in their scents. "It's a very picturesque place with a great deal of its architecture retained even today. Also, the people there tend to be easier going than those in Lyon."

His voice was hushed, and a slight movement of his lips captured what she imagined to be the wind and water. He lifted an arm to flex his fingers, imagining the air in the place that he had visited as a child. "I remember flying a kite in Mont Pellier, along with the other children."

"But the house you wanted to bring me to was in Lyon," Cagalli reminded him, turning slightly so that she lay in the same direction as him now. As she adjusted her body, Athrun watched her. "Lyon's in the North. How did you land up with a house there?"

"Lyon's the second biggest city," Athrun looked up and told her, studying her rosy cheeks and her sleepy expression. "My father didn't want to live in a congested city, but he didn't want to live away from an urban area too. So he got a place in Lyon even though it was urban, simply because it wasn't Paris. Work demands and the whole lot of the usual hooplah." He bent forward, his lips grazing her shoulder as she shifted, then making a small purring sound, pulling him to her as they shifted.

His voice was a bit pensive. "I thought you'd like to visit a place in the south better- somewhere near the sea. The roads there are a bit narrow, and there are boats on the water at any point of the day. They are all brightly painted and they look like flowers in the water when the sun is right, because people go fishing there."

"Draw it." She requested, sitting up and making him do likewise.

He did.

As he sat behind her, pulling the sheets down her back to expose the canvas he needed, Athrun wondered why they'd ended up like this. Why did he want to know of nothing else except the way she felt against him, the swell of her curves pressed to his body and her arms tight around him? Why was he so uneager to return to his work when it had sustained him for nearly seven years? And why did he want to forget the dateline and the time that was running out?

He could think of only that white, smooth back as he pressed his lips to her shoulder, whispering that the line he traced from her nape to her spine was the shore.

She was quiet, feeling him press his palms into one half of her back. Concentrating hard to see what he did, Cagalli knew he was thinking of a place he'd seen a long time ago and had hoped to visit again with her.

"That's the village," Athrun told her. He kneaded his fingers into a portion next to the palm prints he'd left on her flesh. "Those are the little markets that always have the freshest fish. On the fishing days, the sea's the busiest."

Cagalli felt him tracing wavy lines with his five fingers on the first line he'd drawn. His voice was wistful, and his warm breath on her neck made her shiver. "The sea's a bit rough sometimes, but the catches are usually better on those days."

"And then?" She prompted.

"The shore-," There was a small sigh in his voice and the secret he had kept within him seemed to be spilling into the air and onto her flesh now. "There were always children playing there and finding seashells." He dotted tiny spots on the line that she kept in her mind- the line that ran from her neck to the border demarcating where the sheets covered her waist.

Athrun laid his head on her back gently, admitting how his memory had failed him. "I can't remember the rest. It was too long ago."

She turned and studied him, seeing how quiet his smile was- how fragmented and lost he seemed for a second.

"You'll remember soon." Cagalli promised, letting him move to make her lie on her back as she opened her arms to take him near her.

---

Leon had been fast asleep, and had thus not disrupted the tranquility of the Yamato household.

In her own silence, Meyrin Hawke sat alone.

The evening had just arrived and the sunset reminded her of another one. The skies were that strange combination of pink, blue and orange, and the faint outline of the moon could be seen if one stared closely. Another orb hung in the sky, and it was a strange moment when she could see both the moon and sun.

The small garden that Lacus would have tended if she had not been so busy these days was in dire need of weeding. Still, the roses that Lacus had planted were in bloom, as they would always be in the Plant. Those filled the evening air with a fragrance that Meyrin registered and smiled at, and the swing she sat on creaked, its un-oiled chains making a melancholy sound.

She had visited this place in the past, but she had never found more affection for it than in these few weeks. Kira Yamato and Lacus Clyne's home was in another city, and Meyrin had worked and lived in Aprilius all this time. Coming here to stay with Lacus had allowed her to explore the place more thoroughly than in her past visits, and Meyrin had become quite familiar with the house and this garden.

The roses moved gently in the breeze, and it was quite easy for Meyrin to forget that the wind was controlled by a regulator system. Everything seemed natural here on the Plants, although it certainly was an imitation of what life on Earth would have been like.

It wasn't just as easy, however, to forget the things she had kept away from Lacus.

Meyrin studied a particular bud that had yet to open. Its petals remained tightly sealed, its insides unseen as the rest of the world carried on with their own lives. The bud was a small, insignificant nub amidst the other showy blossoms. But it had its dignity, and it kept its own secrets, no matter how small and weak it seemed, or how unimportant its secrets were.

Were Meyrin's secrets merely things that nobody else would want to know about? Perhaps. Were those bits of information and memories she stored within her important enough for her to keep those? Perhaps not.

But Meyrin wanted to keep those still.

When had she decided to keep her secrets from Lacus, who'd always been the second elder sister in her life? Hadn't Lacus always encouraged her and even given her the courage to fight for what she believed in and wanted to protect? Hadn't Lacus been the one person who hadn't looked at her with skeptical eyes, as if she wasn't deserving of Athrun Zala?

Meyrin shook her head, trying to rid herself of those negative thoughts. But she couldn't, no matter how hard she tried to, or how high the swing moved up with her as she kicked off with it.

Her own sister had looked at her like she couldn't quite believe that Meyrin was together with the Athrun Zala. Shinn had been slightly surprised too, although he'd spared Meyrin his comments, unlike Lunamaria.

Meyrin could still remember how Lunamaria had expressed great amazement as they'd left the war memorial.

"I can't believe he went for you!"

Of course, Meyrin couldn't believe it either, but to have Lunamaria, her own sister, verbalise that?

On that day, she'd spent a great deal of time choosing her outfit, hoping to look sophisticated and grown-up with her necklaces and her dress and clutch. She'd chosen something a little more showy with the hint of cleavage, and Shinn had seemed aware of this change. Lunamaria, in her usual boyish blazers and pants, had asked thoughtlessly, "Why do you look like you're on a date today?"

Meyrin had stammered an excuse or something or the other, unable to come up with something solid or valid. She had been so glad that Athrun had not arrived to fetch them all yet. At least, Meyrin had thought, Athrun would not see her in her moment of embarrassment and would perhaps compliment her unlike her insensitive sister and the sullen Shinn.

Lacus had appeared like something out of a fashion editorial, but she had looked normal and entirely at ease, which Meyrin hadn't been able to ignore. Despite having equally pretty clothes, Meyrin had seemed to be out of sync with her sister and Lacus, and there was an uncomfortable middle ground that Meyrin seemed to have landed squarely upon.

But she'd convinced herself that she was grown up, and that like Lacus and her sister, she could stand her own ground.

So Meyrin had waited for him to say something, even after they'd left the memorial and he'd sent them back to their Zaft-allocated service apartment. She had hoped to get a positive response from him, but he hadn't taken her for dinner as she'd hoped. Along the way, plenty of males had whistled or looked appreciatively at her, despite Athrun looking totally normal even when she'd spent hours picking the clothes to wear.

But he had said that everyone looked well enough in the elevator. She'd felt slightly better and slightly more normal, even if her sister had seemed unused to what she was wearing or Shinn had only raised his eyebrows slightly at her choice of attire.

Overall, Athrun had seemed indifferent. He'd seemed to be thinking of other things, looking slightly troubled while leaving the memorial with her trailing behind him.

Thinking about it now, Meyrin laughed sadly to herself.

The swing brought her higher and higher. And for a second, the sky seemed nearer to her outstretched hand.

But then she was forced back to earth, swinging backwards, and even when she kicked forward, there was only so much further she could reach towards.

There was always a limit somewhere.

It hadn't escaped her even back then. If Kira and Lacus had been holding hands as they left the memorial, bathed in glorious rays of the impending sunset, then that was to be expected. In Meyrin's eyes, they were the golden couple, and she hadn't missed the tenderness in Kira's eyes as his loved one had held his arm and leaned her head on his shoulder.

Meyrin hadn't even been asking for that.

But if her sister and Shinn seemed to be smiling and exchanging thoughts despite the lack of trading of words, then why couldn't she? They'd been together for a relatively short period of time, and Lunamaria seemed as stubborn and as much as a go-getter as she'd always been in the past. Shinn was still rather new at dating and pleasing a girl, Meyrin knew, but they seemed to get along well enough. They'd been walking side by side, at very least.

But why did it have to be her trailing after Athrun?

Meyrin wondered about that even now.

The air whistled in her loose hair, and she thought of the days when pigtails had been on either side of her head and everyone had thought of her as Lunamaria's younger sister. No more than that, in fact, despite how proud she was of Luna and how proud of her Luna was. Despite her talent for information-communication and engineering, why had everyone only thought of the elder sister, who'd been a pilot? Was it because she looked like a younger sister, no matter how independent she could be if given the right opportunity Had it been because of that? Or was it for some other reason?

Why did it have to be her, the only female who hadn't been by someone's side but following after the person? What had prevented her from walking by his side, and what had instinctively made her follow after him at that respectful distance?

Yolande and Vino had looked at her with admiration and a bit of disappointment when she'd told them she was Athrun Zala's flatmate, especially the latter.

Vino had inquired if there had been a shortage of apartments for the returning soldiers, or whether everybody was shunning Athrun Zala these days.

Of course, Meyrin knew that she had ended up sharing a place with Athrun Zala because there was indeed a shortage of places that Zaft was facing. She knew that he had probably agreed to let her bunk with him because he'd been concerned that she'd be bullied by her former comrades who thought she'd betrayed Zaft.

There was also the fact that nobody was likely to want to bunk with someone as seemingly aloof as him when he'd defected from Zaft yet again. There were some bad things she'd heard about Athrun when they passed by familiar colleagues who seemed more welcoming of her than him, and Meyrin had wondered why he didn't seem to care or even want to that people were saying things about him.

Of course, Meyrin had been thrilled that because of all these factors, she could stay in such close proximity with Athrun Zala.

But to have had Vino question if it was because of all those factors that she'd landed up with Athrun Zala, as if he was very sure that they wouldn't have ended up together otherwise?

Meyrin wasn't quite sure if Vino was disappointed that his cadet-days crush had landed up with another person, or his pedestal-elevated war-hero had ended up with one rather unremarkable Meyrin Hawke. Either way, she'd bit back her own disappointment that they had seemed to be surprised at the way things had turned out.

Lacus had hid her surprise well enough, Meyrin realized now. Lacus had always been able to come out of any scuffle looking unruffled and very dignified. Even when Meyrin had told her quite boldly that she was sharing an apartment with Athrun, Lacus had only widened her eyes and then said quite mildly, "Why, isn't that lovely?"

It had been Lacus, who had brought her shopping and insisted that Meyrin buy the things she liked- not the things people expected Meyrin to be wearing at any one point of her life.

It had been Lacus to insist that Athrun fetch Meyrin home when Meyrin began working the night shifts at Zaft once more.

It had been Lacus to arrange for Athrun and Meyrin to go to Kira and Lacus' new house in December city for dinner.

It had been Lacus to tell Meyrin what Athrun liked for his meals and to assure her that Athrun wasn't upset or moody, but had a habit of going for hours without speaking.

Nobody else had shown so much support for Meyrin. Not Shinn, who was busy trying to restart his life, and not Lunamaria, who was already in the thick of her new one. Certainly not her old friends, who were skeptical of what Meyrin had done, and certainly not Kira, no matter how neutral or unbiased she had thought him to be.

It hadn't taken long for Meyrin to realize that Kira, as taciturn as he was, had seemed to be uncomfortable with talking to her. It wasn't a matter of not getting along. It was in fact, a highly-justified fear of approaching topics dealing with his twin, his best friend, and what he probably thought of as his best friend's tagalong.

If anything, Kira had often looked at her with some doubt and welcomed her less enthusiastically than Lacus, who'd been far more forthcoming.

It had always been a strange thing in her mind, for Meyrin had not been foolish or distracted enough to think that Lacus would welcome anyone to try and win Athrun over. Lacus Clyne had been through a war with Cagalli more than once, and Meyrin had known even back then that Lacus thought very highly of Cagalli Yula Atha.

Just hous ago, Meyrin had finally plucked the courage to ask Lacus why she had been so accepting of Meyrin when Cagalli had been Lacus' friend.

Blinking back her tears with a smile, Meyrin kicked off into the air, swinging hard and hoping that she would never have to hit the earth even when the swing was forced backwards by gravity.

Stubbornly, she folded her legs under the swing by bending her knees as she had as a child, clinging on tight to the chains. Those would not shatter like her hopes if she clung on, Meyrin told herself fiercely. This feeling of being uplifted and being released would not go away so soon.

"Why were you so accepting of me when nobody was?"

Lacus had looked at her sadly, taking Meyrin's hands in hers. "Because Cagalli begged me to be."

She'd done everything humanely possible to make Athrun love her in return, Meyrin thought morosely. But she had failed because he had never even thought of her as someone he could be possibly interested in romantically.

The short weeks after they'd returned to Aprilius from Messiah had been something of a mess for her. She had woken up every day, beaming like a fool, putting on her uniform and tying her hair as perkily as she could, chirping her greeting to him and trying to make him coffee even if she had been pressed for time.

He'd always prevented her from doing so, telling her that he'd already drank his and had even made her hers because he had wanted her to get a few more hours of sleep. She had always left for work with a huge smile on her face, so glad that Athrun was the kind, caring sort.

In the past, she would rush home after work with things she'd been planning to cook and the ingredients she had fought with other people for at the nearby market. She would smile at the sky on the way back, and think how blessed she was.

Those were evenings just like this one, Meyrin realized, except that she did not smile at the same things anymore.

She laughed quietly to herself. She'd been alone even though she hadn't realized it.

Each evening, as she had opened the grills of the small apartment, he would already be there, at the table, finishing his meal. He'd smile at her and welcome her home, and he would tell her that he'd prepared some food for her too. The food he prepared was always better than what he left for himself, and she would be thrilled at how thoughtful he was and how he'd left the best things for her.

She had hugged herself to sleep each night, grinning away madly, more enamored by Athrun than ever. While Meyrin had been slightly disappointed that what she'd been planning would have to be postponed, the idea of having him wait for her and cook for her had been all she wanted to think of. The next day, Meyrin had promised herself each night, she would find a way to get home early to cook for him.

Come to think of it, Meyrin realized, it had never materialized. She hadn't even been able to cook a single meal for him that he'd touched. Why hadn't she realized that he had never gone beyond a level of simple care and genuine concern for her? If he'd really been waiting for her, would he have finished eating by the time she came home, never mind that she rushed for the shuttle every day?

She sighed, moving through the air now, still swinging because she did not want to go just yet.

He'd always excused himself politely if she brought out the tea as an indication of her wanting to sit around and talk to him. He'd lock himself up in that room of his, always offering to let her use the bathroom first. She had thought it had been care towards her, but his kindness had been mistaken as love for far too many times.

When he'd suddenly informed her that he was paying for the next three months' worth of rent and moving to Orb, Meyrin had wondered what had gone wrong.

Even now, Meyrin wondered if she had blinded herself to the point that she hadn't seen the truth staring right at her in the face.

Every day, at work, she had been praised by her superiors and she'd been proud to know that she had grown up and left Lunamaria's shadow behind.

Every time she came home from work with the things she'd bought and planned to have for dinner with him, she'd been so sure that she had grown up and become a woman that he would receive with open arms.

And on the night when he'd informed her he was moving to Orb, Meyrin had decided that she had one last stab at making him realize that she was everything he needed. She had thought she was grown up enough, and she had been so sure she could make him see that. She had wanted to make him see she wasn't just Lunamaria's younger sister that he had saved out of pity and gratefulness in the past.

"Yo." Shinn was suddenly appearing by her side, helping her with the swing as she sailed into the air and then swung back, as the routine had always been.

"Hey." She stopped the swing momentarily, watching Shinn get onto the other. "What's Lacus and Leon doing now?"

"Lacus is on the phone with Kira," He informed her, "And that boy is sleeping, as usual. He likes to sleep a lot. Luna's watching over him, but I guess she won't have to. When I passed by, Lacus was requesting that Luna bring Leon over so Kira could use a screen to see them all."

She chuckled, both of them swinging now. The air was getting a bit chillier, but for now, it was bearable. It was nice to have them like this, Meyrin thought briefly. She and her friend, here in the garden, leaving Kira and Lacus to talk alone, and for Kira to see his child. Shinn had always been someone Meyrin had thought of as a loyal friend, and that had remained true even after he'd changed slightly in his status as her sister's boyfriend.

"You know," Shinn remarked, "Luna and I were saying that you've changed quite a lot, Meyrin. You've really grown-up or something. I don't know what to call it."

They continued their swinging, both in opposite trajectories but both paths always intersecting in the middle for them to talk.

"I know." Meyrin said simply. "It's not the hairstyle or the clothes this time."

He gave her a surprised look as they whizzed by each other. "How did you know I was going to say that?"

That night, when Athrun had informed her he was going back to Orb, she had decided it was time. That night, she had thought of the suits she had begun wearing, thought of the dresses she'd begun wearing, and thought of how she'd changed her hairstyle and never wore her hair in tails anymore.

She had decided that she had changed, and that she had matured enough.

The night he had packed his things and told her smilingly that he had resigned from Zaft and would be taking the next shuttle to Orb in the morning, Meyrin had done something she kept as the one secret she could never tell Lacus.

Not that it was an important secret, Meyrin thought now, the swinging coming to a pause for a moment.

She looked at the house behind her, smiling wanly, then turned back, her eyes falling on the bud that had yet to bloom.

Not that it had been a secret that had affected anything either. It was simply that even an insignificant secret was worth keeping because she had nothing left of the emotions she'd once felt for Athrun, and because she had no other memory worth keeping of him.

She had taken her shower after insisting that he go ahead first this time. And later that night, she'd entered his room and slipped into his bed. She had been so sure she was ready, so sure he would protest at first because he was a gentleman, but so sure that Athrun would embrace her eventually.

Shinn was whistling a tune under his breath. She couldn't remember what the title of the song was, but she knew it was a familiar one that she hummed to as well.

Till this day, Meyrin could remember what Athrun had said to her.

"Don't." Her arms had been tight around him as she buried her face into his back, liking his scent, wanting to feel him turn and praying that he would look at her and put his arms around her too. But he had spoken calmly, almost like he was admonishing a child who didn't know what a wrongful act was. "This isn't right."

"Why not?" She'd demanded, pressing closer, trying to make him realize that she'd prepared herself for this; prepared herself to try and make him stay. He had not turned around despite or because of her nakedness, and in desperation, Meyrin had held her hand up before his face, knowing that he would at least look at that.

"She gave this to me and told me to look after you! And that's what I want, I've always wanted you to be with me, and I know I'll have to try a lot harder, but I will-," Her voice had trembled and then she had found no more words. She didn't know how to tell him why she had hoped that he would take notice of her. If only she had! If only she'd found the words to tell him of the time spent thinking of him, ever since she'd laid eyes on him. If only she could tell him that she'd waited for him until that moment, with her arms still tight around him.

"I didn't know." Athrun had said after a pause. His voice was very gentle and even humble. "I'm sorry."

But he had not turned around and touched her hand or even the ring she had put on. Meyrin had suddenly known that he had never tried to lead her on or to show more care than what was necessary. At the same time, her eyes had filled with tears and she half-wished that he had told her to leave him alone and tell her that she was nothing to him.

"How did you know that was what I wanted to say?" Shinn asked suddenly, pausing his swing and waiting for her to pause hers too. "That you'd grown up and it wasn't just the way you looked or talked?"

As she paused her swing too, Meyrin felt the friction of her feet with the ground. Slowly, she turned to Shinn, smiling. "Just a lucky guess, I suppose."

The crux of the matter was very simple.

Meyrin had grown up in the moment when she'd watched Athrun Zala leave.

---

"In three days' time," Harumi concluded, "The weapons they have ordered will be sent over. Of course, those will be sent to your place first for storage, and then you can decide what to do with those."

That was perfect. Alstarice, who was the head of the operations involving the drug-production, had reported just yesterday that the drugs were ready to be delivered too. Like the weapons, the drugs were useless for the customers' purposes.

For nearly four years now, Athrun had been acquiring the right companies, both through his contacts on the Isle and the contacts outside of it. The Eyes and their aides had been pooled together to achieve this purpose through various means.

Alstarice Krieg, the Fourth Eye, was in charge of a base in the Tahiti, overseeing the drug production of the companies he and the Fifth Eye, Rune Estragon, had acquired. As a businessman, Alstarice was sly and very persuasive. He did not like removing people by force, but often left it to Rune Estragon instead. Together, they'd acquired everything the Eyes needed to follow the Numbers' instructions of delaying the war that was about to erupt. Athrun did not mind Alstarice, but Alstarice certainly did not like Rune Estragon for reasons that Athrun did not care to think about.

Leopold Wasser, the Seventh Eye, had worked with the Fourth and Fifth Eye to manage the firms and the production lines. His bases were all over the world, with a few in Orb and a few in the Earth Alliance countries. With his supporting or rival firms, those that Alstarice Krieg and Rune Estragon had acquired either expanded or collapsed according to what Lent Mortimer planned.

As Harumi put down the reports she had been reading to Athrun, Athrun nodded and stood up. According to what the Eyes had planned, Marubeni Corporations had remained mostly intact on the surface. While it was going bankrupt underneath its surface, everything seemed fine.

The executives were still people that Harumi used, the cleaner was still the plump, dumpy little man with a toothless smile, the main secretary was still wearing her silver earrings, and everything seemed normal, including this meeting room. The windows around this executive meeting room still showed the world below them, although there seemed to be even more activity on the streets today.

Athrun moved slowly to the windows, staring at the melancholy world below him despite its bustling, energetic façade. Why hadn't anyone looked up? Who were all these people, and why did they have to push forward in the crowds that seemed to be moving blindly? What was their objective as they moved at the breakneck pace, and why move forward when there did not seem to be an end at all?

It was evening, although winter had made the streets look soulless and darker than what the time should have allowed for. No snow fell today, because the city was prone to warmer temperatures in the night.

Below them, a woman was in a beret and red gloves, rummaging for coins at the coffee machine. Some distance away, a man was rushing and disappearing into the crowd that was heading into the underground train stations. But the crowds poured and poured like endless sand and nothing seemed to have changed or have been completed since the day it had started.

Harumi watched as Athrun viewed the streets from above. "You look tired, Estragon. Is something the matter?"

"No, I'm not tired." He turned around to her, ignoring the view for a minute.

He decided not to tell her that he'd already finished planning what to do and was in the midst of executing it now. Cagalli was not going to be able to stand in for Harumi much longer, because Athrun had already decided that she was to leave even before the six months were up. Ko and the aides would definitely miss her, but that was not something he could help anymore than his own pain.

Athrun smiled at her, although it did not quite reach his eyes. "It's just the atmosphere of Ginza, Harumi. It drains a person without him realizing it."

"The whole of Tokyo's like that," Harumi told him bluntly. "Even before the First War and the damage it suffered, the people always moved at this pace. It was like that, especially after the post Bloody Valentine re-construction."

She stared at the perfectly constructed buildings outside the windows. The architecture did not suggest that it had been re-constructed, but Harumi knew better. She had been here for her whole life, so she knew.

Tokyo had been heavily hit during the first Bloody Valentine, and given that it was the capital, the country had suffered quite badly. But then, many countries' capitals had been targeted by Zaft as part of Plant's revenge for the Junius Seven incident. It had been a matter of inevitability that a capital as important to the Earth Alliance member-country, Japan, had been devastated by bombs and multiple rampages.

The Japanese economy had been delayed for a whole three months with the government struggling to reconstruct the city. Even when the Earth Alliance had supplied funds for recovery, Tokyo had been in a quagmire. It had been during that time that Coordinator and Natural relations within this country had suffered its worst damage and Harumi had risen to take over her grandfather's work. He had been old by then and he didn't want anything more to worry about, let alone the recent spate of conflicts that the whole world was losing its better judgment over. He had committed suicide quite happily and Harumi was immediately voted the next head.

It had been an obvious choice, despite how delicate she looked. On the surface, Kitani Harumi passed off as a socialite, and she was the heiress to many legitimate businesses that her grandfather had owned the sense to buy and use as covers. But she had worked hard for a long time with both the legitimate and illegal businesses- she had been ready for a long time.

Frustrated people were drawn to underground societies, whether in gambling in hopes of take their stress away, or even in borrowing funds to support their businesses. The underground societies were flourishing because of the trauma to the capital. Black markets were everywhere, and the steady stream of funds flowed to the top of the underground societies- where Kitani Harumi was.

But while the reconstruction had been going on, the frustrated Naturals had started a spray of unimaginably violent attacks on the Coordinators in that city. Again, that hadn't been uncommon. Even before the First War, plenty of similar conflicts had been going on.

The Coordinators in Tokyo had been doing business and living there without many problems, since Japan had never been overtly against Coordinators. In fact, there had been equal numbers of Coordinators and Naturals in the country with its economic prowess. Nobody knew if flourishing economies drew Coordinators to live there, or if flourishing economies created opportunities for people to pay for genetic enhancements. Whatever the case, Tokyo had been a city that had been filled with each person too busy rushing to care who was rushing forward with them for the train.

But after the Bloody Valentine war had started, it hadn't mattered that people needed to live and not spend time and money fighting. It didn't matter that the supervisors were people that they'd drank and had all-nighters with. It didn't matter if the subordinates were people that had never asked for a pay raise but had worked their guts out to produce at incredible rates. It only mattered who was a Coordinator and who was a Natural.

Fights had broken out everywhere in this district, as well as in many others.

In the business district of Ginza, the Coordinator-owned buildings had been attacked, and the Coordinators had attacked the Naturals in return.

The parks of Ueno had been filled with vandalism denouncing Coordinators. In the red-light district of Kabuki-cho, a Coordinator had beaten up a whore for not accepting his business, and the photographs of the battered Natural had dominated headlines.

In the shrines of Asakusa, a group of Natural children had ganged up on a group of Coordinator children and caused them severe injuries by kicking them.

The stores of Roppongi and Shibuya had lost more business than they imagined possible. Nobody had gone out much for fear of being attacked by anyone who was a Coordinator or a Natural. Nobody had known what could happen anymore.

Shinjuku's underground stations had not functioned for weeks. Kasumigaseki, an interchange, had been bombed one night, and the Marunouchi line had been closed for a week. The carriages had been used as boxing rings despite the police's best efforts to keep the fights out of there.

In fact, the police had been fighting amongst themselves. The weekends on Harajuku had featured people who'd hidden under their outrages costumes to disguise their heritages. That hadn't stopped the Naturals from ripping off those to confirm if the person under the outfit had unconventional-colored hair or eyes that hadn't been achieved by wigs, dye, or contacts. More than a few Naturals had been accidentally killed. The senselessness of it all had not mattered- only the conflict had.

It had been a city torn apart by the world's conflict, as so many other cities in Japan had been. So many other cities in the world had faced the same.

Amidst this, two lovers had wondered how to hide and keep each other safe. They had met and lasted through the First War, but then the Second War came shortly after that, and they'd separated.

Athrun had found out through Yzak Joule about Kitani Harumi's past, for she had told Ezalia Joule about it all those years ago.

Studying Harumi now, Athrun realized that Ezalia Joule must have felt empathy for Kitani Harumi. Just like Yzak, Ko had been born shortly after his father had left. While Yzak's father had been killed in a peaceful diplomatic visit to Earth right before the Junius Seven incident, Ko's father had left Tokyo right before the Second War, escaping back to New York where the conflict had been less volatile. Both women had been left on their own, and both of them had proven to be stronger than their lovers in the long run.

Harumi was still staring at the view, lost in her thoughts.

"Harumi," Athrun said quietly. "Would you like to track Ko's father down?"

His presumption struck him the minute he'd uttered that question. She was more likely to be able to track the man down than anybody else, so why wouldn't she have?

She turned to him, a little frown between her eyes. "I have tried. I did find him."

"Did you speak to him?"

"No." There was no expression in her face, and Harumi folded her hands together. "I only did it to check if he was well. I don't think he wants to see me ever again, as long as he lives. He has his own family now."

Right before the Second War, Ko's father had been injured in a scuffle when he'd been in a bar, trying to stop a fight between his two friends who'd suddenly become enemies after the Junius Seven Drop. The friend who'd been a Natural had turned against Ko's father too, for it hadn't helped that he was both a foreigner and a Coordinator, and that he'd survived the First War and flourished since then. That incident had frightened Ko's father, and in that moment, he'd lost all his nerve.

In that moment, Harumi had learnt how faithless love could be.

Left with a child in her womb, Harumi had been determined to let the child survive. She'd contacted Ezalia Joule, who'd been a contact for quite some time, and her friend had arranged for Ko to be born in the Plants, where it was unlikely to be attacked for some time.

"Why did you ask about his father?" Her voice was quiet but still stern.

Swallowing, Athrun looked at her. He did not know so many things about her, and he had never thought of actually trying to learn about those things. It was just that Harumi's expression had been so empty and so devoid of anything that Athrun wondered if she was wearing a mask like he was too. "I was just wondering what kind of person would leave his child behind."

Harumi smiled. "I never hated him. But I hated my ability to love."

She began to move out of the room, leaving Athrun standing there. But as she did, she had to walk past the row of window panes, and she saw her reflection against the city she'd seen in both its destroyed state and in its most prosperous one.

As Harumi stared at the view that her business partner had looked at, Harumi thought of the moments when she'd walked down those familiar streets with Ko's father. They'd met from very different sidewalks and from very different backgrounds. She had been a member of the underground and he had been a well-known businessman from New York who'd been posted to her country. His company had paid for protection and she'd arranged for some people to accompany him. Then he'd showed up to thank her, and despite her reservations, she had become attracted to him.

They'd ended up in a relationship, and she'd been so sure that they could weather all. What was one war, when they had still met as much as they could? But when the other had loomed on the horizon, he had left, even when she'd been with his child. His last words had been guilty ones- he had told her that it was too dangerous for Coordinator to be with a Natural, let alone one who had ties with the underground societies.

Athrun studied Harumi as she moved slowly, achingly, as if she'd been battered.

He knew that she had never despised the Coordinators for their attacks on the Naturals or vice versa, despite being a Natural. Conversely, Harumi had told him this when he'd asked for the reason why she was willing to deal with Naturals and Coordinators alike.

"They're all human. It doesn't matter how they are born or how they lived. They all die someday."

She turned because she knew that he was looking at her. As Athrun looked at her, Harumi stared fearlessly back at him. Athrun folded his arms and said hesitantly, "Will you do me a favour, Harumi?"

"That depends on what it is."

"Come back to the Isle with me. Ko misses you. You shouldn't be hesitant about returning to see him as often as you can."

She ignored his last comment and focused on his request.

"Is that the favor you're asking for?" Harumi was not to be fooled easily. Things with Rune Estragon were always more complicated than they seemed. He presented himself as someone innocuous, but Harumi knew he was far more complex and far more intelligent than he let himself appear. Already, the drug companies and weapon ones were going bust, even while he controlled the Zala enterprises that had undergone name-changes and had prospered under his control and hers.

She crossed her arms, fighting the rush of emotion in her. "I suppose I can make the time."

"Thank you." Athrun said quietly. "But there's another one."

---

The weather in Plant was the usual sort that one would expect from a controlled environment.

In other words, heavy rain was unlikely, the current air was balmy, the skies were clear with very pretty, fluffy little clouds in them, and sudden bolts of lightning were entirely impossible and unprecedented.

If Lacus had wondered what a snowstorm was when she'd been a child, then she knew her answer at this age. A snowstorm was a matter of the Plant weather agency failing to control the colder temperatures that their system imitated during the 'winter' seasons. In this city, snowstorms were unlikely and therefore uncommon because the agency was quite capable. Skiing would have to be done at a luxury resort somewhere in Switzerland, not in Plant.

In other words, the weather here in the Plants was as perfect as what the citizens expected it to be. The one thing that was constantly absent from Plant's newscast was the weather report, since the assumption was that the weather was perfect everyday. But perfect for what? It was perfect for a picnic. That was true. But it was certainly not perfect for building a snowman, Lacus supposed. Nor was it perfect for dancing in the rain- if people did such things nowadays.

So in this perfect weather, Lacus stood at the gates of the house, wondering if the sky would remain constantly blue until it was time for darkness. Her distracted thought were refocused however, when Lunamaria Hawke hollered, "Okay, I'm going off now!"

Smiling, Lacus watched as Lunamaria Hawke get into the taxi, wind down the window and say loudly, "Take care, all of you."

Shinn was waving too, his eyes trained on Luna in the taxi. As the car moved off, Shinn continued to wave, until Lunamaria was a speck in the distance. Panama was a rather nice place to be in, he supposed, but Luna didn't get much chance to tour the city, let alone leave the barracks.

As Lacus and Meyrin began to move back into the house, Shinn wondered if Luna would be fine.

She had lost weight because of her work and her upcoming promotion, and Shinn wasn't quite sure she had been entirely cheerful. Yesterday, she'd been a bit upset to have to go back to work, despite his best efforts to placate her.

"All fine and dandy for you to say that it's okay," Luna had muttered, right before she'd fallen asleep next to him. "You don't even work in Zaft anymore."

"I used to," Shinn had reminded her, fluffing her pillows a little more. "And I do feel your pain. Slave drivers are common at the upper level, but if you preserve enough, you can be a slave driver one day." He had grinned at her. "But for now, you're the slave."

She'd laughed shortly, easing her head on his shoulder as she closed her eyes sleepily. "Well, pray for me then."

His thoughts of Luna were disrupted by Lacus tugging on his arm.

"Sorry, Lacus?"

"Lunch." She said simply. "I'm cooking pasta. Do you like tomato or sour cream?"

Meyrin's eyes widened. "Lacus! You shouldn't be straining yourself-,"

Shinn nodded in agreement, deciding to let Meyrin vocalize his own concerns. Kira would not be pleased to hear that Lacus was cooking. It wasn't that pasta for lunch was particularly strenuous. It was just that Lacus had a habit of cooking up a storm even if it was something as simple as baking a cake. She could never stop herself from making one more dish if she saw the right ingredients in front of her.

"I'm returning to work tomorrow," Lacus reminded them. "If I'm not capable of whipping up some pasta, then I shouldn't be going back tomorrow."

"Hey, there's an idea-," Shinn piped up.

Lacus shushed him, and Meyrin put her hands on her hips. Her voice had a chiding tone in it, and Shinn was forcibly reminded of his mother, who had used to see mess that wasn't even there. "Shinn, she's right, actually. If Lacus is going to go to work, then we should support her. It's not like you're the one cooking, right?"

"By letting her cook pasta for lunch?" Shinn said weakly, failing to see the female logic that Meyrin had somehow wielded. But the two women against him were probably not going to make his decision the one that they all favored, Shinn realized. Sighing, he followed them back into the house.

As Lacus prepared the pasta, Meyrin shooed Shinn away. His efforts to convince them that he could help to cook fell on deaf and unconcerned ears.

"The last time you tried," Meyrin told him bluntly, "I ate a pie that resembled a bludgeoned sheep."

"Hey!" Shinn was a bit miffed. "That was shepherd's pie!"

"I'm sure it was supposed to be." Lacus assured him, although he certainly did not feel better at the insertion of the supposition.

Eventually, Meyrin convinced him that it was just pasta and his help was not needed, although it was much appreciated. Of course, Shinn stepped out of the kitchen, but did the obvious thing and stayed around in the living room, aware that Meyrin and Lacus were likely to start talking.

If they started talking, he wanted to listen. Not because Athrun had asked him to, but because Shinn was just being a nosy eavesdropper. Besides, he had caught Luna and Meyrin talking about their underwear sizes the other day when he'd been in the shower and they'd been wondering how much soap powder to use in the machine.

Privately, Shinn hoped a similar conversation would start between Lacus and Meyrin.

In the meantime, he took a magazine, aware that the chopping sounds were starting in the kitchen, careful to stay out of their way and careful to look interested in the things that Lacus seemed to like reading about.

The articles she read about were rather heavy-going, Shinn realized. Strangely enough, Lacus didn't seem like the sort who read much, but he supposed that she hadn't quite broken out of a giant shell and appeared as the Head mediator.

Then again, he thought fondly, she might have had. They couldn't all leap out from the mess of broken shell bits as super people, but it seemed quite probable for Lacus Clyne.

He flipped through the articles, and then settled on a particular one that featured world hunger. Shinn wasn't quite keen to read on that, but at least, it would let him think about the upcoming lunch that was accompanied by the fragrances from the kitchen.

Ironically enough, the more he read about it, the less hungry Shinn felt. And then he remembered that he'd left more than an mouthful of food on his dinner plate yesterday, and proceeded to curse his conscience for making him feel guilty. It took no more than three seconds before Shinn tossed the reading material aside and scrambled to go check on the sleeping baby.

In the kitchen, Lacus was cutting tomatoes and Meyrin was stirring the meat sauce. Meyrin had become quite comfortable in this house, Lacus noticed. She seemed to know exactly where the plates were, where the spatula was, and even where the elusive extra virgin olive oil was. Kira had hidden it away in the past, convinced that Lacus had been too obsessed about staying away from any oil other than what she dubbed 'e-v-v-o'.

Of course, Meyrin must have found it, and giving Lacus a thumbs-up, she ignored the normal oil that Kira was fonder of. Lacus beamed, thoroughly agreeing with Meyrin's healthier choice.

All in all, Meyrin seemed to know exactly where everything was. But then, Lacus realized, Meyrin had been handling the meals for the past few weeks when Lacus had been mostly sleeping and looking after Leon.

"So I told him," Meyrin was chattering now, "That Leon wakes up very easily if you bring the camera near with a flash. Shinn, being that hardheaded idiot-,"

"I am not a hardheaded idiot!" Shinn called from wherever he was, suggesting that he'd been eavesdropping from the living room.

"Being that hardheaded idiot that he is," Meyrin continued blithely, "Shinn used the flash. Leon woke up and got shocked, and of course he started crying. Shinn kept apologizing to Leon, but that was about as useful as telling a dog to meow."

Lacus laughed, throwing in the tomatoes as Meyrin giggled too. "And then? Did you get your nice photograph of the baby in peaceful, undisturbed sleep?"

"Yes!" Shinn called from wherever he was. "It should have won a prize!"

"Oh, can it, Shinn! Go to the next room and check up on Leon! Trust me," Meyrin called, "I'm not about to discuss what kind of panties Luna wears with Lacus!"

There was a terrible pause before the sound of Shinn scampering out from the living room was audible.

Meyrin turned back, looking at Lacus with a grin. "Believe me, Leon was not pleased about that."

"I think I know which shot it is though," Lacus said mildly, plucking the basil leaves now. "The one in the middle of the scrapbook, right? The one with the toy duck next to Leon?"

"Right!" Meyrin chimed. "Shinn did a pretty good job, if I do say so myself."

Next to the baby's cot, Shinn blanched. He'd taken lots of photographs of the child on the pretext of making a scrapbook as a present for Lacus, as Athrun had suggested. It had started when Athrun had called and made his request.

But Shinn had refused initially, saying it would be strange. It had been actually, since he'd been hounding the baby with a camera for quite a few days. Even Lacus had been surprised at his enthusiasm. Of course, Athrun had given him a cover, and Shinn had produced a gorgeous scrapbook with Meyrin's aesthetic help and the photographs that Athrun had wanted. The scrapbook had gone to Lacus, and the digital photographs had gone to the person who'd asked Shinn to take those in the first place.

"Don't know what you want these for," Shinn had sniffed, when he'd sent the photographs in digital format to Athrun. Athrun had probably printed those out from wherever he was by now, Shinn realized, and he looked down at the sleeping Leon.

Leon was quite small for a baby, since his parents were of rather small-build too. But as Shinn stared at the child, he felt a need to protect it, along with the affection he'd cultivated for the child that Kira had entrusted him with.

This boy had been wanted, had been hoped for, and would be loved. Shinn reached forward, touching Leon's cheek with his finger very lightly, not wanting to wake the baby.

All the same, Leon stirred and opened his eyes, mewling weakly with a tiny yawn.

Shinn found himself feeling strangely drawn to his friends' baby. Leon's eyes were the blue that he recognized, and the child's hair was a chocolate colour that had made Kira look younger than he really was at any given age. Leon's features were clearly going to be quite similar to his father's, and Shinn thought of how Kira had always seemed so quiet and withdrawn until recently.

When he'd remarked about this to Luna, Luna had commented that she'd said the same to Lacus.

"I told her that Leon was probably going to be like his dad," Shinn remembered Luna telling him. "Gentle and very reserved. Almost introverted, in a way. Lacus looked very sad when I said that, even though she smiled at me."

"And what did she say to your comment about Kira?" Shinn had asked.

Lacus' answer that Luna had repeated rang in Shinn's head now.

"Kira grew up, you see."

The baby was looking at Shinn, familiarity in his eyes. Then Leon gurgled happily and tried to grab Shinn's fingers. Leon's far smaller ones were strong, and Shinn looked at it, beaming. "You're going to be quite a handful, aren't you? Literally, I think."

He lifted Leon out, cradling the boy the way he'd seen Lacus and Meyrin do- even Luna occasionally carried Leon even though she was very afraid to try it. Shinn felt the child's tiny breaths, and he looked down at it carefully. Leon's head was tiny as was his body, and it was difficult to imagine this child growing as fast as Shinn knew Leon eventually would.

The room he was in was bathed in warm sunlight and the walls had been partially covered with colorful pictures of storks with bundle-laden beaks and that sort of thing. Only half the room was covered, and Shinn recognized the semi-completed job. Had Kira been called to Orb before he could complete the wallpapering?

His eyes wandered to the toy bird that was hopping quietly on the window sill. It had begun to break down since a few years ago, and Kira had seemed unwilling to replace or fix it. Tori had not been able to chirp for a long time, and it couldn't fly very high now. Its mechanism was also slowing down, and it looked a bit rusty and old.

Yet, Kira had left it to degenerate.

When Shinn had asked why in the past, Kira's answer had been a wistful one. "I could try to fix it, but I rather leave that to Tori's creator. Besides, it seems right to let Tori age along with all of us- it would be unfair for it to be still able to fly."

In his arms, Leon was still gurgling away, and Shinn knew it was only a matter of time before Leon's first words came about. But in the meantime, the child was helpless, weak and powerless to do anything except smile and cry, and Shinn decided he wanted to make Leon smile as much as possible.

"It'll be more difficult to when you grow up," He told the child quietly.

It was a pity that Shinn did not know any lullabies. The only songs that he knew a child could rest to were probably the songs that Mayu had once hummed as they'd walked to school together- songs she'd learnt in music lessons. Something about one two three, Johnny catching a flea and the flea crying, Johnny dying and the counting starting again.

Shinn scratched his head with one hand. Or was it the other way around? Was the flea supposed to cry in horror, and was Johnny supposed to die of the shock of finding a talking flea, or was the flea supposed to die of stress and Johnny supposed to cry from the loss?

He wondered what Mayu had used to sing about when she used her hairbrush as a microphone. Even at the ripe old age of twelve, she had displayed the tendency to bounce into his room and jump on his bed, playing air guitar and using various props as her singing equipment. Mayu was no Lacus Clyne, but Shinn knew she had owned a sweet voice. She'd loved to listen to Lacus Clyne and she'd even wondered why Lacus had not released a new album after the First War.

Now, Shinn thought it was pure irony that he had been maddened by the grief of his family's death to support a man who'd tried to have Mayu's idol assassinated when Lacus had done no wrong. It was also strange that he was carrying Mayu's idol's child, considering that Shinn had never really worshipped Lacus Clyne the way Mayu had.

At this point, Leon seemed to be looking expectantly at him.

"Hey, you just woke up," Shinn told him. "It wasn't me who really woke you up, so it's not my responsibility to put you back to sleep right?"

The baby made a gurgling sound and its eyes widened.

"Woah- you want me to sing?"

Of course, Shinn thought wryly, he was no Lacus Clyne. He wasn't even at Mayu's level of karaoke prowess either. The last time he'd visited a place which required him to sing was his bathroom and that had only been when he was in an extremely good mood. Even during Vino and Yolande's karaoke sessions, Shinn's singing would signal the point when all of them had one too many jugs of beer.

In other words, he did not sing.

Leon was still looking at him with those blue eyes, as if waiting for something to happen.

"Forget about it." Shinn muttered.

After all, his singing voice was rather embarrassing to himself. It was also a pain to his neighbors when he showered. Either way, Shinn did not want Leon to cry. So he rocked the baby slowly, closing his eyes as Leon remained silent. The little tyke was probably wondering when the song would start, but Shinn knew that silence was better for the health of their eardrums.

With the child in his arms, Shinn began thinking of Leon's parents and of the past that Kira had been through. The silence and the movement of Shinn's arms must have been just as soothing as the lullabies Lacus usually sang to the child, for Leon slipped back into his slumber.

If he had his way, Shinn decided, this baby would never have to go through the pain that Kira and Cagalli had suffered.

---

The clock was chiming and with an impatient little movement of his wrist, Shinn shut it. He didn't exactly need an alarm to go off right now when it was eleven at night and Lacus had just fed Leon. He gazed at them and wondered what was going through the baby's head as he looked at Shinn trustingly. The mother was equally relaxed in Shinn's presence and Shinn was thankful for that.

For now, Lacus was resting, tired out from caring for Leon and having to meet the guests who'd come today. As Shinn sat next to Lacus' bed, watching her stroke Leon's fine, mist-like hair, he wondered why Lacus looked so pale.

She'd spoken to the guests in private for a long time, and they'd only left an hour ago. Meyrin and Luna were already asleep in the rooms that they were occupying in this house, but Shinn had stayed up to wait for the guests to leave. He hadn't felt safe with them here in this house, since they were ultimately strangers to him.

"I'm fine, Shinn." Lacus was looking at him gently. "You've had a long day. You should go rest too."

"No," He assured her. "I'll just sit around for a bit more until Leon falls asleep, and then I'll go sleep too."

She sighed, patting the baby's stomach as it moved energetically in her arms. "He seems too nocturnal for his own good."

Shinn chuckled. "Perhaps. But he behaved very well when you were busy speaking to the guests. He was a good boy when I was handling him."

She'd entrusted the child to him while the three of them had disappeared into Kira's study. But from Lacus' haunted expression, Shinn knew that they hadn't been discussing things like daisies and cupcakes. In fact, Shinn had a pretty good guess about what they'd been speaking about.

They'd probably been talking about Cagalli's disappearance.

From the looks of it though, the guests hadn't been menacing at all. While Shinn had long learnt never to go by appearances alone, the middle-aged couple had seemed quite harmless, gentle even, when they'd asked to carry Leon. Lacus had agreed to it immediately, although Shinn had been less forthcoming.

After all, Shinn had still been rather surprised to see strangers ringing the bell at the gate, and he'd even wanted to chase them off, thinking they were members of the paparazzi pretending to be well-wishing friends of Kira and Lacus.

But Lacus had let them in, hugging them excitedly and telling them how glad she was that they'd come to December City. Shinn had stared as he'd never heard anything about them before.

"Who were those people?" Shinn asked doubtfully. Before he realized it, he'd thought aloud and Lacus was looking at him, smiling a little.

"People who are to be trusted." Lacus answered firmly. "They are as good as grandparents to Leon, and they are the only people other than Via Hibiki who Kira recognizes as his parents. She got up, putting Leon in his cot. The baby began to make chirpy noises, clearly trying to get his mother's attention so she'd pick him up again. Only when Lacus laid her hand comfortingly on his head, did Leon calm down.

"Why would he acknowledge those people that came today?" Shinn was confused. "I mean, that was his Uncle and Aunt, right? They told me when I asked."

"They were the ones who brought him up." Lacus revealed. "In the past, he was upset and didn't speak to them for a long time when they told him that he was a Coordinator and not a Natural. He assumed they'd been the ones to manipulate his genes and they didn't tell him that they didn't make the decision. That would have meant telling him the truth about his real parents. The truth was more painful than what he assumed for those years."

Shinn felt very awkward suddenly. He ran a hand through his hair, looking at the child, at Lacus, then back at the floor. "I've never heard Kira talk about his childhood, so-,"

He trailed off, realizing that he'd heard little from Kira in general anyway. Kira Yamato never seemed to want to talk about himself much. He was a very good listener, as Shinn could attest to, but Kira did not seem to be a very willing speaker. The few words that Kira would say seemed to be only out of necessity, and that was why Shinn was so fascinated by the speeches Kira made while in Orb and watched telecast after telecast of it.

"It's very simple." Lacus told him. "Haruma and Caridad Yamato took him in at his mother's request. He and Cagalli were only babies, but their birth father wanted to use them in the laboratory, and his mother sent Kira to her sister. That was before the fire broke out and everything was destroyed, of course."

"But what about Atha?"

"When Kira was sent off to his aunt and uncle's house," Lacus explained. "Cagalli wasn't even born yet. Kira was taken from his mother's womb before delivery, as the experiment's basis had always been, and his fetus was developed outside a natural womb. But not for Cagalli." She smiled sadly. "It was a perfect scenario for Ulen Hibiki. In experiments, you always need a control, right? The experiment was to prove that if genetic enhancements can be made to a child when it hasn't even really formed and it is still a bunch of cells, then the enhancements will be even more effective than when those are made to a child that is delivered. Cagalli was to be the control."

Shinn was filled with a rage that seemed both familiar but even deeper and more difficult to control than anything he'd felt before. "That bastard! How could he do this to his own wife and children? "

"That's why," Lacus said softly, "Kira is technically the older brother if you consider that one's birthday begins on the minute when the child is separated from his mother's womb. Cagalli was delivered naturally and much later. When Kira could be taken from the artificial womb, the enhancements had already been made. Via used her authority as one of the laboratory heads to take Kira away to her sister's house. Thankfully, Ulen Hibiki didn't realize what his wife had done with Kira."

"Shouldn't he have noticed?" Shinn said weakly. "Wasn't Kira the all important test-subject?"

She shook her head. "Kira was the most important test-subject but there were other Kiras to deal with. You know that there were clones made of him, don't you? Those went through the prototype-experiments first, and quite a few weren't taking well to the pre-birth enhancements. At that time, Ulen Hibiki was dealing with those problems. In fact, he was so busy that he never quite set his eyes on the son that was growing in an artificial womb. He was far too busy with the prototype-Kiras and deciding how to improve the later stages of the enhancement that the clones didn't seem to be adjusting to. That's how Via Hibiki was able to get Kira over to her sister's place, although it had been too late to try and convince her husband not to carry out the experiments on Kira."

She looked at Shinn and he saw tears in her eyes, although her voice was steady.

"A few days before the fire broke out, Cagalli was born naturally. Her biological father never laid his eyes on her after he took a sample of her blood to use the DNA for cloning. She was left alone by her father because they wanted to let her grow for a months before manipulating her genes. Right after that, Via took Cagalli and visited Kira at her sister's house. That's the only time she saw them both and that's when the only photograph we have of her was taken." Lacus folded her hands together.

Shinn thought of how tranquil Via had looked, with the joy clearly in her eyes and the tenderness of her smile present as she'd held the twins. He'd seen Cagalli pausing in front of that photograph before leaving for work at times, and Shinn had never wondered if Via had really been happy at that time. Perhaps, those were the final moments of her eventually-extinguished happiness, and that picture of her had been the last proof of it.

"Then Via Hibiki sent her daughter to an orphanage without leaving her name or any form of identification." Lacus told Shinn. "But Via left specific instructions and quite a large sum of money, telling the orphanage that she would return very soon to collect the child. Her daughter was unnamed at that time too. By then, Caridad had promised to locate and lawfully adopt the baby girl once it was safe to. Then they'd leave for Copperincus, where Kira had already been brought to by Haruma."

"Why couldn't Via Hibiki leave Atha there with her sister and Kira?" Shinn demanded. "Why bring Atha to visit and then leave her in some orphanage?"

"Because Via was desperate to save them." Lacus told him. "Because Via knew that her husband was already suspicious of her sudden obedience with running tests on Kira. Her husband had left her to handle Kira-01, as he was called, and she'd taken that chance to get her son out of there. Eventually, he was going to find out what she'd done with Kira and that the hours she spent locked in a lab were just hours she pretended to be checking on an empty artificial womb. And on the day when she'd left Cagalli in an orphanage, Via had later returned to the laboratory. The final enhancers were to be done that very day, so she went back to face her husband. If she had disappeared to Caridad's place with Cagalli too, it would be far too easy for Ulen to track both Kira and Cagalli down and take them back. Besides, Via wanted to buy time with her husband and prevent him from finding out what she'd done. She was probably prepared to lie to him to throw the scent off for a while. But the fire broke out too soon for Via to escape and reunite with her children."

Shinn fell silent.

"By that time, Caridad had done the smart thing and sent her husband and Kira to Coppernicus. When the fire broke out, Cagalli was safe in an orphanage. And when Caridad knew it was safe to locate and bring the baby girl to Kira," Lacus said somberly, "She went to the orphanage. But the child who'd been left there was nowhere to be found. The baby girl had been adopted by a mistake the management made. Caridad took a long time and quite a lot of effort and money to persuade the orphanage to reveal the identity of the adopted parents."

"Who were they?"

"Nobody, that's the thing." Lacus smiled wistfully. "Caridad left Coppernicus to Orb, trying to track down the adopted parents. In fact, the names didn't even exist anymore, and Caridad thought she'd been taken down some wild goose trail and bamboozled by a money-greedy orphanage. But the orphanage had revealed the child was in Orb, and Caridad visited to try and locate her. The child couldn't even be found after she tried to check the birth registrars."

"Funny," Shinn muttered. "Wouldn't the Orb Princess' birth be quite an event to remember or celebrate?"

"It never was." Lacus told him. "Nor was her name recorded in the birth registrar until much, much later. Her own adopted father didn't even know when she had been born. Of course, the only people alive who did were Haruma and Caridad Yamato."

"So how did they track Cagalli down?"

"They used the contact numbers the adopted parents had left, and one of those led them to a man who'd recently bought his house from a woman with a different name that Caridad was given. Caridad wondered if the name the orphanage had received was an alias, and she asked for the previous home-owner's number. Eventually, they found the woman who'd been in the civil service but had recently resigned. The woman never offered an explanation as to why she resigned, but Caridad convinced the woman to tell her how the baby girl had ended up moving out of an orphanage to be adopted by her employer. Eventually, the former-civil servant talked because Caridad kept pleading with her."

Shinn widened his eyes. "So Caridad Yamato realized that it had been the Orb Head who'd adopted the baby girl?"

Lacus nodded. "She and Haruma tried to arrange a meeting with the Orb Head. The Orb Head insisted that he'd picked the child from all those available and that he would never return the baby girl that he'd already named. Caridad kept pleading with him but he was quite adamant about it. She even cited how it had been an accident that the girl had even left the orphanage, but Lord Uzumi would have none of it."

Shinn pursed his lips. "Atha never talked about this."

"Why would she?" Lacus said painfully. "Imagine growing up while knowing that your father adopted you because he needed an heir. I understand from the reports that came after her coronation that she was personally chosen by Uzumi, but Cagalli never seemed to believe it."

"Neither do I." Shinn said vehemently. "Why would he choose a girl as an heir? It lacks sense."

Lacus sighed. "And there was that resigned civil-servant who'd adopted a baby girl on behalf of Lord Uzumi. Why would she suddenly resign if she was understandably and presumably at a very high position to be entrusted with a top-secret decision? I don't think it was a simple resignation. I think there was a mix-up on Orb's side too."

"So why wouldn't Lord Uzumi give the girl back to the people who'd come to look for her?" Shinn questioned.

"I'm not sure. Caridad told me that it ended with the Orb Head telling them that he was very sorry for their trouble and their pains. Having said that, he told them that he could never give up the baby girl he'd named Cagalli back to them. More than that, he told them that they could never let the twins meet."

"That's so selfish!" Shinn cried. "Just so he could have an heir?"

"Both parties were eventually convinced that letting them meet would mean telling them the truths about their separate adoptions, and that would lead to them knowing about their real parents and having to go through more pain than they had to know. That's why both agreed the twins would never meet."

Shinn narrowed his eyes, his old hatred of Lord Uzumi running through him once more. He had accepted Cagalli, but there was that old resentment of the person who'd made decisions costing his parents and Mayu their lives. "I think he knew that would make them leave. He probably just didn't want the matter to blow up. He probably didn't want everyone to know he had to adopt a child since he had no wife or couldn't give birth to one. He was probably impotent or didn't like women or something."

"I understand what Uzumi Nara Atha meant though," Lacus said wearily. "If he let the twins meet and understand how they'd separated and how Cagalli had eventually become his daughter, she might want to leave. It wouldn't matter that Uzumi had wanted to adopt a child and had adopted her, even if through some twist of Fate. It wouldn't even matter that her twin had been sent to Coppernicus, where Caridad had migrated to. And Uzumi would be left without a child he'd already grown attached to. It would be impossible for him to adopt again, both in terms of the procedures and also in terms of the feelings he'd invested on the child."

"I see." Shinn stilled. "That's why Kira Yamato and Cagalli Yula Atha never met until much later. Then the photograph I saw in her house-?"

"That was given to her by her father much later." Lacus told him. "The writing at the back was completed by Caridad herself, since she found out what the girl's name was eventually. Kira and Cagalli." She stood up, turning around and drying her eyes almost unnoticeably. Leon had fallen asleep some time ago, but Lacus felt restless and ill at ease. "That was why they only met sixteen years later."

Lacus looked at him wearily. "That's why it's such a pity-,"

Shinn burst up from his chair, his voice shaking. "She's coming back. She will."

Lacus turned, looking at him with that quiet countenance that made Shinn feel insecure suddenly. "She must."

---

In the kitchen, Meyrin was speaking about Shinn and his tendency to be overprotective of children.

"He's overprotective all the time with me," Meyrin had complained, frying the meatballs at the same time while Lacus handled the pasta. "Like I'm not a grown-up or something!"

"Well," Lacus teased, "You are rather like a young, pretty girl he has to protect for his girlfriend too. Part of his brotherly duties, I expect."

Meyrin snorted. "Please don't tell me it's the pigtails! Anyway, that was so yesteryear." She flipped her hair confidently; the red waves made loose to give her a more mature look. "He just refuses to back down when I tell him I'm not Luna's baby sister anymore. There was a thug bugging me the other day when I went shopping for groceries with him, and I got fed-up and asked to be left alone. That thug started cussing and you know what he does? He tells the guy not to swear because there's a minor around!"

Lacus giggled. She doled out the sauce, the delicious-smelling steam making the kitchen warm while their laughter brightened the place.

"And with Leon too!" Meyrin rolled her eyes. "He just doesn't want to let me hold Leon even though Leon likes me better! He says I'm not strong enough to hold Leon in my arms for more than fifteen minutes! He times me! But he'll carry Leon for an hour if you don't come along. He says Leon and him get each other-," She grimaced. "Whatever that means when you say it with that emphasis."

Lacus grinned at Meyrin. "Actually, I grew up with Athrun Zala and Yzak Joule. I used to hear Yzak Joule tell Athrun Zala to leave me out of their games. Chess, in particular. He used to say that females just didn't get it, whatever get means with that emphasis."

"Men." Meyrin chirped, taking out a table-cloth. "The last male I hung out with boasted that they have a fifth sense. Idiotic, chauvinistic pigs!"

"But Shinn probably sees you as a younger sister," Lacus commented. She smiled fondly at Meyrin, wishing she had a sister half as lovable as her.

Meyrin was busying herself with frying the mushrooms in butter now, and the smell filled the kitchen, making Lacus feel hungrier than she had in a long time. Meyrin did have extraordinary culinary skills, and Lacus was always glad to have her here during meals. She studied Meyrin, who was spooning the mushrooms out and then taking off her apron.

"He's very caring towards you and your sister, you know." Lacus grinned.

"Well," Meyrin turned around, looking a bit hesitant suddenly. "I suppose people tend to be like that. They tend to replace in their hearts, even when they say they'll never be able to. That's the only way to deal with loss, I think. That's why people can still move on when they realize they can't forget."

Lacus studied the girl.

How grown-up Luna, Shinn and Meyrin had become suddenly! There was Lunamaria, who had been always a little too independent and self-assured for her own good to the point of being reckless and even irresponsible! She was about to become a captain in Zaft, and she'd learnt what it meant to look out for others and learnt why being so forceful and assertive often did harm to those who were concerned about her.

In the past, Shinn had been warped by his resentment and fought at any chance he got just to prove he was worth something. Now, he was looking after a child that wasn't even his, caring for it and learning what it meant to live for someone else instead of himself for once. Had he noticed why Kira had thrown himself into the work at Orb and had never complained even once? Or had Shinn noticed the way Cagalli had done the same just for the single memory of her father?

And Meyrin-

Lacus studied her. Soft-spoken but with a newfound confidence, Meyrin was very attractive even if she'd lost the old qualities that men who appreciated the Lolita appeal looked for. She still had that young naiveté about her face, but how intelligent and mature she was! How different they all seemed beneath their familiar exteriors! While time had seemed to go on for all of them, how had the three young people she'd met some years ago become this fine man and women she was proud to know today?

"At least Shinn's moved on." Lacus murmured. "It's more difficult than most people realize."

"If you ask me," Meyrin remarked, "I think he feels a bit guilty all the time. That's why he always looks uncomfortable when you mention Athrun or Cagalli."

"What do you mean?" Lacus inquired. "I did notice he looked a bit nervous when I mentioned both the other day. But what's he guilty about?"

"Shinn probably feels partially responsible for the way their relationship failed." Meyrin told her.

"Why," Lacus was puzzled, her hands pausing as she lifted up a lid of a pan. "That doesn't seem quite right."

Meyrin shrugged. "I think it's right that he feels that way, even if Cagalli never blamed him for shooting off his mouth and saying some horrible things about her and Orb in front of Athrun. It's like he feels that what Cagalli eventually did for Orb's sake ruined her and Athrun's chance at being together. Cagalli agreed to marry Yuna Roma Seiran even though she was engaged to Athrun, right?"

"I suppose so." Lacus said thoughtfully. She turned and checked the fire. "I think this should be ready."

In no time, the food was laid on the table, but Meyrin's calls to Shinn did not seem to be answered. Since Meyrin was busy with getting the cutlery, Lacus offered to fetch him and Leon.

As she wove her way out of the kitchen, Lacus caught sight of herself in the pans and sighed inwardly.

She'd put on some weight after her pregnancy, and while she did not look overtly heavy, Lacus wondered why the puffiness of her face did not seem to be going away. Perhaps, she'd been taking too many late nights and having too few hours of uninterrupted sleep. Hopefully, Leon would outgrow his habit of waking up and demanding to be carried or fed in the night.

As Lacus traipsed around, calling out to Shinn, she paused when she saw him.

He'd fallen asleep in a couch, with Leon cradled securely in his arms. He was snoozing, looking a bit frazzled even in his sleep, like he was having a slightly unhappy sort of dream. His frown indicated that his mind was still thinking of something difficult or something he'd not wanted to think about.

Overall, his expression did not look quite peaceful, although her son seemed to be quite happy and safe with Shinn.

Smiling at both, she woke him up by taking Leon from him, and Shinn immediately leapt up, looking rather like a threatened animal. Then he realized what was going on and flopped back into his seat, looking a bit apologetic. "Whups. Didn't know I fell asleep. Leon must have as well."

"You've been working hard for these few days," Lacus said patiently. "Thank you, Shinn."

He smiled wanly, thinking of why he'd really agreed to come here with Luna when she'd called and told him she wanted to visit Meyrin and Lacus. Athrun had made an express order that he was not to say anything that would lead Kira to know anything more, and Shinn sincerely hoped that he had not done anything of that sort.

"Don't mention it. It's nothing, really."

---

Watching Cagalli run and clash wooden swords with Harumi, Epstein felt his worry give way to surprise and then growing amazement as Cagalli executed attack after attack. Cagalli had never looked more confident while attacking than she currently did, and she was lethal in her precision and flawless in her footwork. More than that, Epstein knew she had a tendency to be somewhat of a daredevil when she was forced into a corner, and that always provided an element of surprise.

Harumi was as usual, flawless in her tactics and movements. It was difficult how to see she could move while wearing that outfit of hers, Epstein thought briefly, but it was Kitani Harumi, after all. She could have been wearing a blindfold over a balaclava and still been very formidable.

Next to him, Athrun was watching quietly, a small smile of satisfaction playing on his lips, and Epstein knew his foster parent's plans were going well. Athrun had been training her for some time now, and Cagalli's stamina had increased dramatically. She had already been rather competent in hand-to-hand fights before this, but now, Cagalli was more than adequate.

Harumi did look a little taken aback as Cagalli flew towards her, but Harumi was even more experienced and possibly more determined, and she responded with equal force.

In a hushed tone, Epstein asked, "Isn't she ready?"

"Yes." Athrun answered quietly, turning and moving out of the training hall.

As Epstein followed, he cast a look back at Cagalli. She was defending herself now, and the way she leapt and deflected reminded him quite significantly of Athrun. Athrun had taught her well, and Epstein knew she would be able to last quite long against Harumi.

Athrun had taught her more than that too. At present, Epstein knew Cagalli was a rather crack shot with short-distance firing and could aim directly for the heart even during surprise attacks. Athrun had been bullish about that, insisting that she perfect the timing and her reflexes, and Epstein had been surprised to see her obeying and learning. Clearly, Athrun had a hold on her that she didn't quite realize, and Athrun had managed to pass on the skills she needed to have.

Hours before that from the tower, Epstein had used a pair of binoculars to watch the yacht steer its way back into the tiny harbor surrounded by rocks. It was both a hiding place and storage area, and it was also difficult to pilot because of the large, jagged rocks in the way. At first, Epstein had thought nothing of the yacht returning with Athrun and Cagalli. Later though, when Athrun had informed him that it had been Cagalli doing the steering, Epstein had found himself very impressed.

Athrun however, had seemed less surprised.

"Why aren't you surprised that she's quite good at using that yacht?" Epstein demanded now, following behind Athrun.

"She's a natural pilot," Athrun told him. "Not the best, but certainly above average, very competent and it comes instinctively to her."

"Cagalli's a natural, right?" Epstein inquired. "You told me she could pilot mobile weapons too. How, if she doesn't take enhancers?"

Athrun shrugged. "I never figured that out. But I suppose she has that ability and she did have rather good training from Morgenroete with plenty of practice. I'm not sure if she can still pilot now though- you do have to keep at it or the skill level does drop quite quickly."

"Really?" Epstein widened his eyes. "Then you-,"

"Yes. I can attest to that." He said wryly. "The last time I took a mobile weapon out for a spin was when we last trained, Epstein. That was-," He thought for a bit and then shrugged. "-never mind."

"You old man." Epstein grinned. "You still speed like mad in that car. I'm glad you have a chauffeur like me- you drive your car like you pilot your Infinite Justice."

Athrun had the grace to look slightly embarrassed. "I suppose I tend to forget that piloting is different from driving at times. I did run into that problem when I switched from auto-pilot mode in the yacht to manual mode. I found myself steering more forcefully than required. Nearly broke off the wheel, except that Cagalli stopped me."

"I can't believe taught her how to use that yacht though."

"She's quite decent at it."

"I'll bet." Epstein said, thinking of the rocks she'd steered her way out of.

"And besides," Athrun added, looking at Epstein, "She's been practicing very hard for these few days now."

"Yeah?" Epstein snorted. "I bet that's not the only thing you had her do when you were both out at sea."

He'd watched Athrun's lips quirk and Epstein had laughed in relief, knowing that their relationship was going well.

Athrun was certainly pleased at Cagalli's ability to use the yacht now, as well as to shoot accurately in close and long ranges. She'd lost her fear of using a gun now, and she was fine with using it to the point that it was like an extension of her arm.

Athrun strode to his study, getting ready to call Tom. It was time to leave for Prague and as much as Athrun wanted to stay and watch Cagalli, it would not do to be late. Erik Stumsson was already waiting, and Athrun didn't want to keep him doing that. There was plenty to discuss and plan, now that Cagalli had perfected what Athrun needed her to do.

---

As Lent Mortimer finished his report to Seven, he was prepared to cut the line, except that Seven was suddenly saying, "Your primary aide is Miles Summon, am I correct?"

"Yes sir."

"Get him on the line. I want this conversation to be confidential."

Lent understood. That meant closing the doors and not listening in even though Lent was sorely tempted to. What could Seven be asking from Miles Summon that he didn't want anyone else to hear?

Within minutes, Miles Summon stood before the screen, feeling slightly uncomfortable. The doors of the meeting room were closed and he felt himself sweating just a little. The hierarchy of their organization was abided by very strictly, because orders had to flow seamlessly and the risks of soldiers acting on their own wills were far too great for Plant and Zaft to bear.

"What medication have you been supplying to the Fifth Isle?" The question was more like a demand.

For Miles, he wondered if he'd acted wrongly. The instructions the Eyes had given were always to be followed by their aides. Even when he was the primary aide of Lent Mortimer, he was still required to do as the Fifth Eye had asked of him. The only people reporting to Miles Summon were the second and third aide that the Second Eye worked with, and Miles was still bound to follow the orders that the Fifth Eye had conveyed through Epstein Cleamont.

Of course, if a Number was speaking to him, a mere aide even if he was the primary one of the Second Eye, Miles had every reason to feel quite uneasy. Had he done anything wrong? Since when had a Number wanted to speak to an aide?

"Answer the question," Seven demanded.

Miles quaked and said stiffly, "Er- the usual, sir. The usual painkillers that are given to all Eyes and Isles for training, the usual aspirins and the usual cough-drops and flu-vaccinations and the-," He realized he was rambling and quickly shut his mouth. He had worked under Seven once before he'd been asked to come to the Isle, and he knew that Yzak Joule was a highly impatient person.

"Yes, yes," Seven said hastily. "What else? Anything out of the ordinary that the captive has been requiring these days?"

Miles ran though a mental checklist. "No sir, nothing that she hasn't been given in the past."

"Such as?" Seven barked.

"Flu-jabs, tranquilizers, aspirin and the pill."

He flinched as the voice squeaked in its fury. "What? Say that again!"

"Those were necessary for preventing her mood swings," Miles explained quickly. "At one point, she was in trauma, sir."

He could recall that the Fifth Eye had been rather bogged down at one point, having to handle the new shipment of refugees into the Manor while keeping the captive chained to the bed in case she hurt herself. She had been in a state of trauma, and she had seemed to have slipped into depression. Preventing her monthly flow of blood and the hormonal changes along with that seemed the best way to prevent her from becoming more volatile.

There was a sharp intake of breath on the other side of the line. "Oh- oh right, I see." But then the voice seemed to grow in its suspicion again. "But you're still sending that combination with each shipment of medicine to the Isles?"

"There was no order to change it." Miles explained helplessly. "None that came to me, anyway, sir. Maybe she's still a bit volatile, so they thought that continuing that prescription would be good for them to control her anyway."

At least, Miles hoped, that would make her less of the wild animal he'd seen in the past. He could remember her flying at him in a rage and he shuddered now. The Fifth Eye had always seemed a bit stressed around her- maybe she was the kind who made everyone a bit jumpy.

"Right." Yzak was quite sure he had caught onto something. "Right. Thank you, Miles."

He cut the line.

---

Back in the training hall, Cagalli had just lost the fight that Athrun had made her enter. He'd brought her here to the hall, telling her that he wanted her to meet someone. Upon stepping into the hall, she'd seen Harumi and began to run towards her. So had Harumi, except that Harumi had whipped out a long, wooden sword at the last second and tripped Cagalli with it.

Now, Cagalli was pinned to the ground again. Harumi's sword was right in front of her face, and Cagalli was panting as profusely as Pepita had done after running for hours along the coast.

"O-Okay," Cagalli said quickly. "I give up."

She watched the white teeth flash as the petite woman put aside the wooden weapon and pull her to her feet. "You're way too good for me, Harumi."

"But you lasted for a much longer time than I thought possible," Harumi said calmly. "Quite a feat, Cagalli."

"Thanks." Cagalli shook her head. "I suppose that using wooden swords are less threatening and pressurizing than real ones." She brightened up. "How was Ko?"

"He has improved." Harumi said composedly. "A lot more focused than before. A better centre, a better placement of his attacks- everything. Like with you, I was surprised to find that Ko lasted for fifteen minutes while sparring with me."

"Oh-," Cagalli's expression fell. "I didn't really mean his skill with-,"

Harumi only smiled enigmatically, waving away Cagalli's concerns with an unconcerned hand. Cagalli did not know what to make of it, but Harumi gave her little time to do so. "Come with me. I have a gift for you. But you must take a bath first."

"Y-You shouldn't have," Cagalli stammered, but again, Harumi waved her hand imperiously.

When they entered the room that Cagalli had previously occupied, she winced a smile to Harumi and fetched a towel, knowing that Harumi could not be disobeyed. She fled into the bathroom, and Harumi took a seat, waiting for her. Naturally, Cagalli felt relief. Harumi did not know she had a relationship with Athrun then, Cagalli thought, and that was why Harumi had come to this room instead of Athrun's.

Before long, Cagalli emerged, dried as best as she could. But Harumi had taken something out- a parcel that she unwrapped upon seeing Cagalli. And then Harumi swirled its contents out over the bed, and Cagalli saw an exquisite robe unfold. The robe Cagalli picked up was like a canvas of a painting, and her eyes widened as she noted the craftsmanship that had made this robe. But she had scarcely any time to stand there, looking at it, for Harumi was suddenly grabbing the scruff of Cagalli's neck by her shirt and pulling her top off.

Immediately reminded of Mana, Cagalli squawked in surprise and tried to pull away, but Harumi was even stronger and more insistent than Mana. Worse still, Harumi carried a sword and Haumea-knew-what-else with her. Cagalli had no option to refuse as Harumi pushed her headlong into the process of trying on the kimono. Her pants were going next, and Cagalli's efforts to hide did nobody any real good.

"Harumi," Cagalli protested, trying to move away from, "I can do it myself-,"

Harumi took a step back, observing her. "Alright."

Cagalli turned red. "Er- with you watching?"

"We're both women." Harumi said calmly. "Why would you feel embarrassed?"

Cagalli began to say something, then shut her mouth, turning even an even more intense shade of cooked lobster if that was even possible. Slowly, she turned to a wall, pulling down her pants and stepping out of those. Then awkwardly, she turned to face Harumi.

While Cagalli was left standing in her underwear and feeling very insecure, Harumi looked at her appreciatively.

Cagalli fought the urge to cover herself with her arms, but Harumi smiled knowingly. "I'm sure he's told you that you are very beautiful."

"What made you think so?" Cagalli laughed. "Are you kidding me ? Ko's only got one mother in his mind-,"

"No, you misunderstand me." Harumi interrupted her quietly. "I meant Athrun Zala."

Cagalli fell silent.

Harumi's smile was teasing and secretive, and her eyes were very intelligent. Naturally, Cagalli knew that Harumi's appearance must have deceived many more than once. Beneath that polished, cultured image, Harumi was very sharp and as observant as Ezalia Joule. Both women must have gotten along for all the right reasons and for all the same qualities they'd found in each other.

"Raise your arms." Harumi commanded.

As Harumi tied the knots expertly and with a gentleness that Cagalli was surprised by, Cagalli realized that Harumi's hands had the similar calluses that Ko's had from training.

"Did you go through the training that Ko goes through now?" Cagalli asked slowly, holding her arms out as Harumi adjusted the obi. Harumi nodded, tucking cloth here and there.

"As a child. It's important to start young."

Cagalli could find nothing to say in response to Harumi. But she knew she'd heard that note of sadness in Harumi's voice, and she knew that Harumi had not wanted Ko to go through this either. As Harumi put the final touches on the robe, Cagalli lowered her arms and felt Harumi turning her to look at the mirror.

The gift was a glowing shade on her skin and Cagalli widened her eyes, her lips curving because of her surprise. The maple shades of the silk seemed to be that perfect combination of rust and gold and the glimmer of it was very flattering. Harumi had chosen well, and Cagalli was neither overwhelmed nor forgettable in this outfit.

Harumi smiled, noting her appreciation. "I knew you'd like it. It was one of my very own and a favourite at one time. I'm entrusting it to you now."

Cagalli moved to pick up the kimono sleeve, looking at herself in the mirror and admiring its embroidery and the way the patterns of trees and branches seemed almost like pale, silvery shadows on its amber background. The swinging sleeves added a grace that Cagalli had never noticed, and she saw Harumi nod in satisfaction behind her.

She turned to Harumi. "But- why?"

"Because of Ko." Harumi answered firmly. "You've taken good care of him, and I want to thank you for that." A small smile crept to her lips. "Although you could say that I'm still being selfish- he used to say that this looked nice on me. If you wear it, maybe he'll think of me."

And suddenly, Cagalli understood that Harumi thought more of her child than what she could bear, and that Harumi had never wanted to leave her son and live apart from him. When Harumi had commented on Ko's skill rather than Ko after meeting him, Cagalli had been stunned. But Cagalli had not realized that Harumi had been making a deliberate attempt to numb herself.

"Harumi," Cagalli said pleadingly. "He needs to be with you. You can't leave him like this at this age."

"He won't be safe if I let him stay with me." Harumi said firmly. "The underground societies are not places for children who don't know how to protect themselves. And even when he knows how to now, I won't let him live there. He could be harmed at any moment, because plenty would want to use him as a trump card against me."

"But here, he's alone for most of the time," Cagalli begged. "When I leave, what's going to happen? Will he keep training like a machine with the twins and Epstein? Is this place the right one for a child?"

"At least he will not be killed," Harumi said, her voice faltering. "At least he'll be safe here. I won't allow anyone to hurt him, even if I have to die for it. If he must be here to be safe, I want him to stay here. Estragon was very kind- and that's why I will never let him down." Her eyes flew to Cagalli. "Look after both of them for me, Cagalli."

Cagalli stared at her, and despite all she knew and did not know about Harumi, Cagalli knew that Harumi would never willingly hurt her son or disrupt his childhood if it hadn't concerned his survival.

She flew into Harumi's arms, stunning the cold, composed elder woman.

Then Harumi hugged her back, and they remained like that for some time, with Harumi's tears hidden from the rest of the world.

---

In that same hour, Shinn had returned to Orb.

At present he held up a letter, passing it over to Kira as they all sat in Cagalli's office. "This was faxed to your office in Zaft. I went there as you instructed me too- to check your mail and that kind of stuff."

Kira knew. He had requested Yzak Joule to give Shinn clearance as Shinn would be helping him bring over some things to Orb.

"I hid it from Lacus and Meyrin." Shinn added. "I told them I was going to meet you in Orb and that you thought it was better if they stayed there."

"Right." Kira nodded. "What else did you find when you were there, helping me take things over here?"

"Nothing else." Shinn said directly. "Yzak Joule let me in, and then I went to the fax machine to check if anything was stored there. I found this."

What he did not tell Kira was that Athrun was aware that Shinn went to Kira's office in Aprilius quite regularly to clear things up. Athrun had asked about Shinn's next visit to the office in Aprilius, and had given him specific instructions.

The paper was a bit crumpled and Kira knew that it would be impossible to get any leads on those who had sent this. It had been faxed over, as Shinn had said, and if there had been anything to trace the address, Yzak would probably have erased it by now.

Kira didn't believe a single thing that Shinn was telling him about someone being able to hack into the system and send something that Shinn had coincidently been there to see and collect. In his mind, Kira was pretty sure that Yzak Joule was behind this. Yzak Joule must have used a Zaft-barrack fax machine to send something that Athrun Zala had wanted Kira to see.

And then Yzak Joule had gotten into Kira's office while letting Shinn in, and found a way to distract Shinn while deleting the address. No unknown address could have sent anything to Kira's machine- it was technically impossible unless something had been hacked. But there was a far simpler way to do things- by using insiders.

Studying it with a frown that seemed to have become a permanent fixture between his eyes, Kira looked at Shinn. "Was this why you insisted that you come back to Orb immediately?"

"Yes." Shinn said firmly. "This letter was faxed by an unknown address and I thought you needed to see it. I'm sorry to have made you think that something had happened to Lacus and Leon, but I couldn't tell you why I wanted to return to Orb immediately to talk to you."

"Why?" Aaron demanded. He stared at Shinn, trying to read his face, but Shinn remained impassive if slightly agitated by what was understandably his panic.

"I was afraid the phones in your office were bugged or something," Shinn muttered. "I mean," His eyes widened, "If your fax could be hacked into despite you blocking all the unknown addresses, then clearly-," He trailed off, shaking his head. "I was a bit panicky, I guess."

It was much simpler than that, although Shinn was not going to say it. Yzak Joule had faxed the letter that Athrun gave him to Kira's office. Shinn had been instructed by Kira to pick it up and send it to Orb. Athrun hadn't even needed to hack anything- he'd merely relied on Yzak and Shinn. Subsequently, Yzak had deleted the known address that Kira's fax machine had stored, and had calmly locked the office and waved goodbye to Shinn, who'd set off for Orb after making a call to Kira.

"Won't it be kinda obvious Yzak Joule and I are in this?" Shinn had asked weakly.

"Don't worry," Athrun had told him. "He never threatens the sources of information because he knows you're not the goldmine he needs."

"Should I try and cover who might be sending this letter?"

"No," Shinn remembered Athrun telling him. "I want him to suspect who's sending this anyway. He'd be an idiot if he didn't know it was me by this time."

Kira stood up, reading its contents once more. The seal was there again, making it the third time he'd seen it on any piece of paper. This time though, the letter had been typewritten, and it was impossible to know if it was truly Cagalli who'd written this note or someone else.

He turned to look at Shinn, not really sure what to think. He did not trust Yzak Joule, who was most certainly keeping in contact with Athrun Zala, but Kira wasn't quite sure about Shinn. Shinn may or may not have been in contact with Athrun, Kira suspected. And while he didn't have a single bit of proof to support that hunch, Kira knew that was the most likely possibility here. How else would Shinn have been at the right place at the right time to receive a letter that was clearly not meant for any one else's eyes in Zaft?

And Yzak Joule had swallowed the idea of letting Shinn clear the security checks to enter Kira's office to 'clear the mail and that sort of thing' quite readily. Surely, Yzak was stricter than that?

Shinn was looking at him concernedly. "What's the matter, Kira?"

Kira turned to Aaron. "Shut the doors. I don't want Marlin to hear of this letter from Cagalli and to rush off to Sweden by himself."

Aaron hurried to the doors, locking those.

And as he did, Kira made his decision. There was no time to waste because Cagalli's life was already in danger. Like all the other letters, he could not simply not take heed of this one, and he had to act now. It didn't matter who was keeping in contact with Athrun Zala, Kira thought firmly to himself. The point was that Athrun was sending him a message, and he had no choice but to trust him now.

"Kira," Shinn protested, wondering what the significance of the letter with the intricate-looking symbol had been. "What makes you think this is from Cagalli? And why can't you speak with the Britannian Premier around?"

Aaron locked the door securely.

Kira turned to his desk, and pulled a pocket mirror and the real seal out. He looked at the letter, held it up, and put the mirror to it. As Shinn stared at the name that appeared on the mark of the seal on the letter, Kira watched his face carefully. "We can talk now."

---

10 days.