Same italics and disclaimers as before

Chapter 25: Insecurity

Dr. Roquette groaned as she slammed on the horn. "Stupid traffic!" she snarled, "Why did the center of mystic energy in the universe have to be in Atlantic City?"

"Because the old location in Salem was compromised," Naruto yawned, "Just be patient. We're almost to the boardwalk." He glanced in the rear-view mirror. "Raven? You okay?"

The girl shivered in the backseat. "Fine," she said as she rubbed her arms, "I'm just not used to having clothes anymore." Sterling had taken her shopping the day after she had taken Raven in and let her pick out all her new clothing. She was wearing a plain black t-shirt with a black skirt and black ballet flats with dark grey tights (Sterling wouldn't let her get an all black wardrobe). The black clashed hard with her pale skin, but it was good to see that in only ten days under Roquette's care, the girl had put some meat on her bones and that her ribs weren't protruding so much. "What's this guy's name again?"

Naruto sighed. "Dr. Richard Occult. He was the one of the very first magicians to put their talents to crime-fighting."

"And why does he have to teach me? I want you to teach me."

Naruto smiled slightly. "I know, Raven, but you're practically magic personified."

"I'm ten. I don't know what that means."

"It means you need a teacher who can help you understand magic, as well as yourself," Naruto turned back to her, "Besides, Dr. Occult used to be a university professor. He has actual teaching experience."

Raven arched an eyebrow. "I thought you were a magician. Can't you teach me to understand magic?"

Naruto cringed. "Well, sorta. My magic is rudimentary at best. It can take decades to become a full-fledged magician. I only had a year of formal training."

"So you're not really a wizard then."

Naruto fixed her with a steely gaze. "Can you understand me?"

"Yes."

"How about now?"

"Um, yes."

"Still know what I'm saying?"

"What are you doing?"

Naruto smirked. "I just spoke in Romanian, Russian, and Mandarin. Clearly the multi-lingual spell I put on you works, thus making me, at the very least, a spell-caster."

"Fair enough," Raven crossed her arms and leaned back in her seat.

Roquette looked back and forth between them and grunted. "You guys are weird."

Naruto leaned forwards. "Pull over here. There's a cheap parking lot."

Roquette groaned. "Now I have to pay for parking? This is just getting better and better."

"It's fine," said Naruto, "You just have to drop us off on the curb." Roquette nodded and pulled over to the side of the busy road.

Naruto unbuckled himself and opened the passenger side door, stepping into the crisp night air of the early winter. "Say good-bye, Raven," he said as he climbed out and headed to the trunk. He opened it up and pulled out Raven's trunk, hefting it onto the sidewalk.

Raven stepped out of the car and it drove off. "She was nice," she said simply, "She'll be okay, right?"

"She should be," Naruto said as he walked towards the boardwalk, "Superman hooked her up with a cushy gig over at S.T.A.R. Labs in Metropolis."

"Oh, okay." They reached the boardwalk and Naruto took a deep breath, inhaling the sharp sea salt in the air.

"Alright, listen to me, Raven," he said quietly as she stepped up next to him, "When I found you, you were resigned to your fate. But now, you're out in the world. I don't know what you've been through and, frankly, I don't want to know."

"Probably a good idea," said the girl softly.

"You need to move past it," said Naruto firmly, getting on one knee so he could look her in the eye, "People like us, people who grow up alone, we had to grow up faster than other people. We don't have happy childhoods, but that just makes us stronger."

Raven blinked and looked out over the sea. "What do you mean? All being alone taught me is that I'm weak."

"But you're not, Raven," he said softly, "You are not weak. You are strong because you know what it's like to be alone, to be scared and vulnerable, to be hated and tortured. You know what that's like. But that lets you know the power and importance of your bonds. You know how valuable your friends and allies are."

"I don't have any friends."

"Wrong again," Naruto softly took her chin in his hand and turned her back to face him, "You have me." He stood up and took a deep breath. "I guess we should get going. Dr. Occult is waiting for us."

"So where is the Tower of Fate? I would've thought I could see it by now."

Naruto slapped his face. "My bad, I forgot." He waved his hand in front of Raven's face and uttered an incantation under his breath. She blinked and gasped in awe as the Tower came into view.

"Whoa."

Naruto vaulted over the boardwalk edge and landed on the beach. Raven threw over the suitcase and Naruto caught it with one hand. She crawled over the edge and Naruto helped her to the ground. Naruto rapped his knuckles on the door and it burst opened. "It's about time!" snapped Dr. Occult as he strolled out, "You said you'd be here an hour ago!"

Naruto stared at him. "Ah, there was traffic." Dr. Occult had traded in his ratty bathrobe and scraggly beard for a pointed goatee and velvet robe with a scarlet, woolen cape. His hands were covered by black opera gloves with mystic symbols swirling through the fabric. He looked like Elton John's personal warlock.

"No excuse!" he snorted, "You could have teleported! Or whatever it is you do!"

"I wanted to show Raven the city."

Dr. Occult turned his attention to the girl. "Ah! So this is the child. Yes, I see what you mean. She practically leaks magical energy. Aye, she'll make a fine apprentice."

Raven stared at Dr. Occult and looked back at Naruto. "I've been in Cadmus for half my life," she said dryly, "But even I know a crazy person when I see one."

"Insolence!" cried Dr. Occult, "How dare you!" He lifted his hand and a shower of green sparks rained down on Raven. She began to float off the ground and Dr. Occult crowed in victory. "Behold how I lift you up with a mere wave of my hand! Imagine what I could do if I was actually trying!"

Raven grunted. "Stop that!" Her eyes flashed black and she fell to the ground. Dr. Occult blinked and waved more sparks over her. She simply glared at him, not budging an inch. A vein began to bulge in Dr. Occult's forehead as he concentrated harder. Raven turned her head to the side. "What are you doing?" she sighed.

Dr. Occult sighed and lowered his hands. "Oh, she's going to be impossible to deal with." He cracked his neck and tossed off his cape. As it landed on the beach, it dissolved into sand and Raven's eyes widened. "Really?" he said in disappointment, "Me being able to lift you doesn't impress you, but a simple transmutation spell has you in awe? You're as backwards as a southbound car in a northbound lane." He motioned to the door and reentered the Tower.

Naruto knelt down and Raven glared at him. "Yeah, he's a bit rough around the edges," Naruto admitted, rubbing the back of his head, "But he's experienced. Trust me, this is for the best."

Raven sighed and looked into the Tower. "Is this good-bye then?"

"Of course not!" Naruto grinned, "You're not getting rid of me that easily. Besides, I've set you up in a hotel room in that casino over there," Naruto pointed to a casino on the boardwalk, "The receptionist is waiting for you. I'll come for dinner every night and every morning to wake you up, when I'm not on a mission at least. If I don't show up, you can order out. The school bus picks you up on the other side of the casino at eight weekday mornings."

Raven's jaw dropped. "School? You're kidding me, right?"

"You didn't think I'd let you get by without a formal education, did you?" Naruto took a step back as Raven glared at him, "I'll see you tonight." With a blink, he Hiraishined to the Zeta Tube in Atlantic City. He stepped through the bright light and his next step landed on the lit floor of the Cave's main hall.

"Naruto!" called Wally, "Look who decided to join the team!" Naruto blinked as he stared at the tall, red headed young man in a red outfit with a bow strung across his chest.

"Red Arrow?" he said skeptically as he walked forwards. The entire team had assembled in the hall along with Green Arrow, Red Tornado, and Batman.

"In the flesh," said the archer coolly, "I don't suppose you have a problem with me joining?"

Naruto folded his arms. "No, provided you don't make a mockery of everything we've worked hard to make here."

Red Arrow grinned and raised three fingers of his right hand. "Scout's honor." Naruto scowled, but nodded and took a step back. Artemis stood next to him, gripping her bow so tightly that her knuckles were white.

"Wow. She's pissed even by my standards."

I'll have to make sure she doesn't feel alienated. These guys have known Red Arrow for years. To her, it looks like she's being replaced.

"Why does it have to be you? You're not the leader of the team anymore."

Naruto scanned the room, observing his team as Green Arrow briefed them on their mission. I may not be their leader, but I am their kage, their protective shadow. I'm not letting this team fall apart while I'm a part of it.

"Everyone got that?" asked Green Arrow and Naruto blinked, realizing he'd missed the entire mission description.

"Sorry," he said with a sigh, "I totally blanked. What's happening?"

Green Arrow looked at him angrily, but Batman lay a hand on his shoulder. "It doesn't matter," said the dark knight, "I have a separate mission for Shinobi."

Green Arrow shrugged and the team split up. Red Arrow, Wally, Kaldur, and Artemis headed towards the hangar while M'gann, Conner, and Zatanna headed for the kitchen. Red Tornado flew up into his apartment above the main hall and Green Arrow stepped through the Zeta Tube. Robin flicked up his wrist computer and began controlling the Cave's holoscreens for Batman.

"Since you weren't paying attention," snapped Batman, "I'll go through a few things. Four hours ago, Sportsmaster was sighted at the Louis Armstrong New Orleans Airport. Less than an hour later, Watchtower sensors detected that the security systems at Belle Reve Penitentiary shut down for three minutes and thirteen seconds."

Naruto raised an eyebrow. "Did you check with Warden Strange?"

Batman nodded. "He said they were uploading new security software, that the shutdown was totally prepared for and expected."

"And yet, you want me to investigate anyway," Naruto surmised, "What do you suspect?"

Batman folded his arms over his chest. "I've had my suspicions about Strange ever since the ice fortresses. Only the ice villains in Belle Reve would have access to the technology required to design them, but Strange showed me video footage of all five ice villains in their cells for the duration of the attack."

Naruto rubbed his chin. "Those attacks were just diversions," he said, "They gave Count Vertigo the chance he needed to try and kill Queen Perdita. Luckily, Kid Flash stopped him."

"I read the report," nodded Batman, "But the investigation as to who built the ice fortresses is still ongoing. All answers lead back to those villains, but Strange insists they had nothing to do with it."

"You think he's covering for them?"

"I'm not sure," sighed Batman, "But he failed to inform the Justice League of any system upgrade, and that puts him back in my crosshairs."

"He's only been warden for a few months," Naruto pointed out, "He might have just forgotten."

"Perhaps," said Batman, "But unlikely. I want you to go down there and investigate."

"Why not you guys?" asked Naruto, "You are the resident detectives after all."

Robin grinned. "Thalia Al Ghul was spotted in Gotham a few days ago."

Naruto raised an eyebrow. "I don't know who that is." Robin pointed at Batman and made a rude gesture with his finger and a circle. Batman slapped him upside the head as Naruto cackled. "No kidding?!" he laughed as he clutched his stomach, "Wow, I figured you were married to the job, Batman."

Batman shoved Robin towards the Zeta Tube. "I don't think I need to tell you that this is a deep cover mission. Not even Warden Strange can know you're going in."

Naruto frowned. "Belle Reve is a fortress. Nobody's broken in and only Riddler's ever broken out."

Batman practically tossed Robin through the lights of the Zeta Tube. "Your Sharingan is supposedly able to uncover any secret. If anyone has a chance of finding a weakness in Belle Reve's walls, it's you." He turned back and slumped his shoulders. "Please don't disappoint me. I've been having a bad week."

"Yes, sir," sighed Naruto with a lazy salute as Batman walked through the Zeta Tube.

"A waste of our talents," grumbled Kurama.

No problem too big or small, sighed Naruto as he put in the coordinates of the New Orleans Zeta Tube.

. . .

Naruto hadn't noticed it last time he had been to Belle Reve, but the entire complex was surrounded by miles and miles of swampland. This meant Naruto was forced to crawl through the marshes on his stomach to avoid being spotted by the high-powered searchlights that constantly scanned the surrounding lands. It was a slow, uncomfortable process that left him soaked and covered in mud by the time he managed to flush his body against the outer walls.

He waited for a moment while the search lights passed in front of him before he took off his mask and took off his eye patch. He shoved it in his pocket and put his mask back on. Alright, let's get started.

"Three guards in the first tower. They're complaining about the wages. Two more operating each spotlight and every single one hates being so close to a 500-degree lightbulb. A few more scattered around on the upper walls. There could be more who just happen to be feeling completely content today."

They're humans, Kurama, I don't know if any of them are completely content.

"You say that like you're not one of them."

Naruto looked up the wall and he took a step away. His Sharingan traced the patterns of the lights and shot up the side of the wall, using his chakra to stick to the thick cement. I've been wondering about that these days.

"What do you mean?"

I mean, am I really human? I come from another dimension. My physiology is so different from them.

"You mean your chakra network? It's just like a secondary bloodstream. Even your chakra points mostly correspond with earthling pressure points. It's not so different if you really think about it."

It's more than that. Naruto flipped over the side of the wall in total silence, right behind a roving guard. His Sharingan showed him where all the cameras and blind spots were on the far side of the wall. He vaulted over the railing and slid down the cement into a loading dock. My blood is almost completely incompatible with theirs. I'm willing to bet my DNA is incompatible too.

Kurama hesitated as Naruto darted from blind spot to blind spot. "Is there something you aren't telling me, kit?"

No. Why?

Kurama took a deep breath and breathed out slowly. "You know M'gann is a shape shifter, right? On the cellular level, too. She could make her body compatible."

Naruto blinked. I don't follow.

"I'm saying it's theoretically possible to have kids with her." Naruto nearly stumbled, just barely managing to avoid being spotted by a camera.

Uh, run that by me again?

"Oh stop lying to yourself, kit," sighed Kurama, "The way you handled the Bijuu cubs, how you're treating Raven…you could be a father."

Ah, no. Not a chance. Naruto reached the loading bay door and slipped beyond into the shipping office.

"I'm sure M'gann would be interested to have that conversation with you."

I'm only eighteen! I'm barely an adult in this world!

Kurama shrugged. "Tell yourself whatever you want, kid. You remind me of Mito in a way. She was a good parent too."

Mito Uzumaki? Your first jinchuriki? Naruto crawled under a grid of motion sensors, scooting across the floor of the shipping office to the far door.

"Yup. I hater her, but she was one heck of a mom."

How was I related to her?

"Oh who knows. After the fall of Uzushiogakure and the scattering of the Uzumaki Clan, it became impossible to keep track of all of you."

Fair enough. Naruto pushed open far door of the office and sighed in disappointment.

"What is it?"

I was hoping it was going to be easy. Naruto looked up with a grimace at Belle Reve's inner security walls. These must be the walls even Superman couldn't break. His Sharingan revealed the truth. The inner walls were made of air-tight cement covering a second layer of the wall made of ten feet thick stainless steel-titanium alloy. The wall was topped by sensor array that reached ten feet into the air. It was a tight design and well crafted. Nothing was getting into or out of those walls.

Naruto stayed in the shadows as he crept across the courtyard that separated the outer and inner walls. A patrol of roving guards rounded a corner and Naruto dove forwards into the shadow of the far wall, sliding behind a few crates scattered through the courtyard. One of the guards stopped and narrowed his eyes at the shadows where Naruto hid. "Problem, sir?" asked one of the other guards.

"Thought I saw something. Peterson, take a quick look. If there's nothing there, catch up with us."

A guard, presumably Peterson, gulped. "And if there's something there, sir?"

"Then inform me straight away. Don't try to play the hero and don't engage any potential enemies. After that security breach, I don't want anyone taking any unnecessary risks." Naruto scowled as Peterson broke off from the rest of the group and the other guards continued around the corner. Peterson took his assault rifle off his shoulder and began poking around the crates. Naruto watched him and, when he got too close, he would walk around to the opposite side of the crate. After a few moments, Peterson sighed in relief and ran after his patrol.

"The guards aren't taking chances, hmm?" Kurama mused, "That debunks the software update theory."

Strange would have told them, Naruto agreed, And they referred to it as a security breach. There's more going on here.

"We should gain access to the security footage," advised Kurama, "Maybe there's some clue as to what happened."

Naruto grunted as he gazed up the wall before him. And how do you suggest I do that? This wall is impregnable.

Kurama hummed and rubbed his chin with his massive paws. "As Naruto, there's no way in, but as another…"

I could walk right in.

"Not quite. The guards probably have a way to identify each other. But we know someone inside Belle Reve, someone they probably don't want out."

A slow smile formed on Naruto's face. "Understood," he said softly as he stood up, putting his hands together to formulate his chakra. With a burst of smoke, he became lean and pale, transforming into the frail form of Icicle Jr, complete with prison-orange jumpsuit and metal collar.

"Hellooooooo Belle Reve!" he shouted aloud, tossing away a crate like it was a matchbox. It splintered against the wall and Naruto grinned. He picked up a splintered board and tossed it like a boomerang over the massive wall. It went through the motion sensors and alarms immediately blared. Guards swarmed from everywhere as spotlights flooded the courtyard. Naruto raised his hands in surrender as the guards surrounded him, their weapons drawn. "I give up!" he cried, "It was a stupid escape attempt anyway."

A guard grabbed him roughly by the arm and forced him to the ground, snapping a pair of cuffs on him. "I don't know how you got out, kid," he growled as he yanked Naruto up, "But you're gonna be in solitary for a long time because of it."

"So is your wife," snapped Naruto with a grin.

The guard smirked as he pushed Naruto forwards with the butt of his gun. "That doesn't even make sense!" Naruto shrugged as he was marched towards the massive doors embedded in the wall around the corner. As they opened with mechanical whirls, Naruto was shoved through them and began his walk through the corridors of Belle Reve. At night, the lights were shut off. The only guide Naruto had was the light of the guard's flashlights. The alarms began to fade as guards across the entire complex learned that the escape attempt had been foiled and they shut down their sirens.

After a few minutes of walking through the dark and largely empty hallways, they eventually came across the solitary confinement cells. "About time," Naruto muttered to himself.

"What was that, convict?" demanded the guard behind him.

"I said 'Damn fine'. I'm just imaging how your wife looked on my bed last night."

There was a pause before the guards all burst into laughter. Naruto frowned as they practically fell over themselves with laughter. "Jokes on you, kid," managed one, "Paul here's gay!"

Naruto blushed as he realized what he had just insinuated and walked forwards in silence. "Here," said another guard as they approached an empty cell, "You'll stay in here until the warden's ready to see you."

Naruto's eyes widened and he dove to the side. The guards caught him, but he managed to grab at the wall. "No!" he shouted, "Anything but solitary! Please!" The guards just laughed as they dragged him across the wall and shoved him roughly in the cell before slamming the door shut. As soon as it was closed, Naruto grinned and let down his illusion.

"Would you like some eggs with that ham?"

I needed to make it believable.

"Whatever you say, kit, whatever you say."

Besides, I needed an excuse to grab the wall so I could put my Hiraishin Formula on it.

Naruto put his ear to the door and waited until the sound of footsteps disappeared in the distance. He Hiraishined outside his cell and cracked his neck as his Sharingan showed him the path to the security room.

He walked leisurely through the hallways until he passed the women's laundry room. Aw, this is where M'gann and I first kissed.

"Your first kiss was in a prison. That's probably not something you should admit to an outside observer. Actually, I take that back. Your first kiss was in a schoolroom with-"

Finish that sentence and I'll rip all the chakra out of your body. Kurama roared in laughter and pounded his paws against the floor.

His laughter suddenly cut short as he sniffed the air. "Kit…"

Naruto's Sharingan whirled. I see them. He stepped to the side and closed the door to the laundry room. A few seconds later, a series of footsteps come from down the hall. "Check this out," said a voice, "Junior here escapes all the way to the courtyard, gets himself caught, and winds up in solitary. But then, he escapes solitary and goes back to his cell!"

"I'm telling you!" cried another, familiar voice, "I've been in my cell all night! I swear! There's no way I was in the courtyards tonight!"

"Nice try, kid," snarled another voice, "We have dozens of witnesses and security footage. You can't lie to us, not inside these walls."

"Icicle Jr." muttered Kurama, "You thinking what I'm thinking?"

Forget the security room, Naruto kicked open the door and it slammed into one of three guards, throwing him into the wall and knocking him unconscious. He swiveled and roundhouse kicked a second guard into the floor. He bounced into the air from the sheer force of the blow and Naruto delivered another kick into his stomach, sending him flying into the far wall. The last guard managed to level his gun at Naruto before the ninja ducked down and swept the guard's leg out. As the guard fell, Naruto landed his elbow in the man's sternum, leaving the man in mild shock as he hit the floor.

Icicle Jr. stared at Naruto for a moment before groaning. "Oh, it's you."

"Good to see you too, Junior," sighed Naruto as he grabbed the criminal by his bound arms and pushed him against the wall, "Now, what happened with the security breach?"

Icicle Jr. snorted. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Your dad knows everything that happens in this prison."

"And you think he tells me? Dude, I don't know anything about a security breach."

"Except you're lying," sighed Naruto, "You know there was a security breach because these guards," he motioned to the unconscious guards around them, "just told you."

"I didn't escape," muttered the villain.

Naruto grinned and transformed back into Icicle Jr. "Yes, you did."

"You jerk!" hissed Icicle, "Do you know what the guards will do to me? After the last escape attempt…" he shuddered, letting Naruto's imagination complete the idea."

"I don't really care," said Naruto, converting back to himself, "Just tell me what happened."

"I'm telling you, I don't know."

Naruto looked him in the eye and growled. "And I know that you're lying."

Icicle blinked. "Dude, what's up with your eye?"

Naruto pulled him off the wall and slammed him back. "I'm not going to ask again," he snarled, head-butting Icicle.

"Alright!" snapped Icicle, shaking off the daze of the hit, "Fine! I might know something about a security breach. But what makes you think I'm gonna tell you?"

Naruto stared at him in amazement and his jaw dropped. "Wha…but…," he motioned around at the guards again. "Did you not just see me take out three guards in, like, two seconds?!"

Icicle Jr. stuck his nose in the air. "You stole my girl, bro. Not cool."

Naruto rolled his eyes dropped Icicle to the floor before pushing chakra through his Sharingan. "Inferno Style! Flame Control!" Naruto raised his hand and black fire snapped into existence above his palm. "You like ice, right?"

Icicle scrambled against the wall. "I've heard of that stuff!" he hissed, "You wouldn't use it on a living person! You'd kill me!"

"And your point is…?"

Icicle stared at him as he struggled to stay away from the growing fire. "B-but what about Batman?!"

"Eh, never really liked him."

Naruto waved the fire and Icicle shrieked. "Alright! Alright! Warden Strange shut down the security systems so Sportsmaster could sneak in through the vents! I don't know why Sportsmaster wanted to break in or if he left or anything else! I swear!"

Naruto smiled and closed his Sharingan, extinguishing the fire. Icicle slumped to his knees and breathed heavily. "Thanks," said Naruto, brushing invisible crumbs off his shoulders, "Sportsmaster, huh? What would he want to break into a prison for?"

"I told you," whispered Icicle Jr., "I don't know. You need two trucks and a crowbar to open my dad's mouth."

Naruto began to pace. "Sportsmaster," he thought aloud, "The only reason he would break into prison would be to break somebody out. But who would he want out?"

"You're asking the wrong person," Icicle groaned, "But I can tell you this. This afternoon, Ivo was acting weird. Well, weirder than usual."

"Ivo?" Naruto frowned, "What do you mean weird?"

Icicle stood up and brushed himself off. "Well, he challenged my dad for the top spot in Belle Reve."

Naruto blinked. "Ivo? Against your dad? That's pretty one sided."

"That's what I thought," said Icicle, "But then he attacked dad and actually started to win. But then the guards took him and Warden Strange personally put him in solitary."

"Warden Strange," grunted Naruto, "It all comes back to him, doesn't it. If Strange let Sportsmaster in, that means he's in on whatever's going on."

Icicle hesitated before sighing. "Oh, what the heck," he said, "When the guards were taking me to solitary, I saw Strange and Ivo in T.O. Morrow's room."

Naruto drew a kunai and pointed it at Icicle. "Take me there."

Icicle raised an eyebrow. "You know, I don't think you would actually kill me. You're bluffing."

"Fair enough," said Naruto with a shrug, "I'm a 'reformed' ninja. But have you ever heard of Harm?"

"No, can't say I have."

"Small-timer out of New York. Killed his sister to attain a pure heart or some bull crap like that."

"So?"

"So I cut off his hands." Naruto spoke with a totally straight face and Icicle had really no choice but to believe him.

"Oh, okay," he gulped, "Um, right this way." Icicle began to walk down the halls with Naruto's kunai jabbing occasionally at his back. After a few minutes of walking, Icicle motioned to a lit doorway. Naruto peeked around and frowned. Ivo was facing away from him, looking down on a comatose old man in a bed, hooked up with dozens of wires and IVs. "How do you wanna do this?" whispered Icicle.

Naruto snorted and walked confidently into the room, with Icicle gaping behind him. "Ivo," he said coolly, "Good to see these Belle Reve goons didn't tear you inside out yet." Ivo made no indication that he had heard Naruto and continued to stare unblinking at the man before him. Naruto walked around to the other side of the bed and cracked his knuckles. "You want to tell me what business you have with Sportsmaster?"

"My pleasure," said Ivo.

"Good. Spill."

"My pleasure," said Ivo.

Naruto stared at him for a moment before opening his Sharingan. "Oh, you have to be kidding me," he muttered in frustration.

Icicle blinked. "What? What's wrong?"

Naruto shot forwards, holding open his arm so that he clothes-lined Ivo right in the head. The head left the body with a sickening crack and a burst of sparks and the expressionless face clattered to the floor with a metal ringing. "My pleasure," said the android, "My pleasure."

"A robot," Naruto sighed, "Of course. Ivo's a robotics expert. Sportsmaster must want him to make some kind of robot for him."

"And get Strange and my dad in on the action?" Icicle mused, "That's a lot of pull just to make a robot."

"It must be important," said Naruto, "Ivo built an android that nearly took out the entire Justice League. Maybe they think that with the right support, he could succeed."

"So what are we gonna do?" asked Icicle.

Naruto blinked. "We?"

"I told you about Ivo. I'm a rat now," grunted Icicle, "Do you know what these guys do to rats? You get no respect from the guards or the other prisoners. They'll tear me to pieces. No no, I'm sticking with you until this whole thing blows over."

"And what makes you think I'm letting you tag along?"

"I could be useful," argued Icicle, "I know the ins and outs of the criminal underworld, sorta. If Ivo and Sportsmaster are on the outside, I can help you find them." Naruto blinked and cringed slightly. He'd been using the Sharingan for too long and it was beginning to ache. He slowly shut his left eye and took his eye patch from his pocket. He took off his mask, tied his eye patch back on, and looked up to face Icicle.

"I can trust you?"

"You can trust me to not want these guys to get their hands on me."

Naruto shrugged. "Good enough for me." He drew a kunai and stepped behind Icicle, slicing open his restraints. He tore off the prisoner's collar and the villain gasped in relief as his skin became living ice.

"Whew! What a rush!" he snarled as he flexed his arms, "So, what now?"

Naruto turned and walked out of the room. "Warden Strange. You think he'll know anything?"

"Probably," said Icicle, following him, "But I don't think we should try. He got really paranoid after he became Warden and installed enough guards around his quarters to hold off a small army."

Naruto rubbed his temples as he changed direction and headed towards the walls. "This just keeps getting better and better."

"Welcome to my life," grunted Icicle, "Now, how're we gonna get out of here?"

Naruto paused thoughtfully. "How far are we from New Orleans?"

"Um, like, seventy-something miles. Why?"

"Close enough," Naruto grabbed Icicle by the arm and Hiraishined wordlessly to the formula he had on the New Orleans Zeta Tube.

The Tube was hidden in an empty mausoleum in an ancient graveyard where nobody had been buried for centuries. As soon as he winked into existence there, Icicle Jr. began to freak out. "What the-" he looked around in horror, "Where am I? Am I dead?! Oh, God, please don't let me be dead!"

"Relax," said Naruto, "I just teleported us out of there."

Icicle looked confused, but accepted the fact that he was no longer in Belle Reve with no small satisfaction. "Whoa," he said, "So, this is New Orleans then? Great." He turned away and started to walk away.

"Where do you think you're going?"

Icicle flipped him off without turning around. "I'm out, sucker!" he called, shooting a burst of ice behind him. There was a sudden flash of yellow light and he felt something grab him by the arm. Before he could react, he was lifted up into the air and slammed down on the ground again.

Naruto looked down on him in mild disappointment. "How did a thug like you ever become more than a blip on the radar?" he muttered.

Icicle blinked in amazement. "How did you…" Naruto pointed to Icicle's arm and the villain looked to see the ink of a Hiraishin Formula sinking into his icy skin.

"I can teleport to anything with that mark on it," Naruto explained, "From now on; I can find you anywhere, anytime."

Icicle stood up and brushed himself off. "Well, that's a huge invasion of privacy."

Naruto drew a kunai and held it to Icicle's throat. "Are we gonna keep this up, or are we gonna put Ivo back in prison?"

Icicle hesitated before he sighed. "Well, dad would be pretty pissed if a deal he was in on went sour, so I guess I should probably help you."

"Wise choice," Naruto pocketed the kunai, "Now, where do we go from here?"

Icicle stroked his chin. "Well, we're in New Orleans. That means we go to the zombie."

Naruto groaned. "I've had bad experiences with zombies."

"Don't worry," sighed Icicle, "This one isn't all too bright."

. . .

"Grundy smash!" roared the massive, grey beast as he swung his colossal fist down on the table in front of him. It splintered at his very touch and Naruto cringed.

"Good to see you too, big guy," said Icicle, taking a seat in front of the demolished desk. They were in the office of an abandoned steel mill on the outskirts of New Orleans. Men in fine suits with tommy guns stood at even intervals around the wide room and a woman in a dress suit stood besides what could only be described as a giant. He stood twelve feet tall, had decomposing, grey skin and wore a tight, ripped, Italian, pinstriped suit. His fingers were the size of Naruto's entire arm and his ugly, marred face peered down on him accusingly.

Naruto hesitantly slid into the seat next to Icicle. "So, you're the zombie?"

"Solomon Grundy!" roared the beast, "Born on a Monday!"

"Ah," said Naruto dryly, "Good to know." He turned to Icicle. "Is this his usual greeting?"

"Wait for it," said the criminal.

The woman next to Grundy checked her nails before lighting a cigarette and blowing smoke into the air. "Mr. Grundy welcomes you, Icicle Jr." she said in a sultry voice, "And he wonders why he should let you live after you brought a hero right into his base of operations."

Naruto blinked behind his mask. "You know me?"

Grundy slammed his fist down on the few boards of what was once his desk that were left, making them shatter into wooden shrapnel. A piece stabbed into the throat of one of his men and the poor gangster sank to the floor in a pool of blood, his compatriots not even bothering to look at him. "Shinobi!" shouted Grundy, "Bad ninja!"

"My reputation precedes me then."

"Mr. Grundy is waiting for an answer," said the lady.

Icicle Jr. cleared his throat and steepled his fingers. "First off, Grundy, I approach you with the most humble of respects, it is no less than what you deserve." The giant grunted and motioned for Icicle to continue. "Second, I brought Shinobi here as a show of good faith. Call it putting all my cards on the table, if you will." He raised his arm to show the drying Hiraishin Formula. "As long as I bear this mark, I'm his prisoner. So I didn't lead him here so much as he forced me to find you. A man such as yourself can surely appreciate the irony of such a situation?"

Grundy thought for a moment, letting out a long, drawn, out hum. "Grundy don't understand," he rumbled finally, "But Grundy forget why Grundy angry with ice-boy."

Naruto jabbed Icicle in the ribs. "That should be your new name."

Icicle snarled at him as Grundy took a seat in his massive, leather recliner. "Grundy help ice-boy and bad ninja," he said.

"Grundy, nothing illegal happens in this city without you knowing about it," said Icicle, "Do you know anything involving Sportsmaster and Anthony Ivo?"

"Check with secretary," said Grundy, jabbing his thumb at the lady next to him. He looked down and scowled at the floor. "Who break Grundy's desk?"

"You did, sir," said the woman as she drew out a smartphone. Her fingers played over the screen for a few seconds before she nodded. "Sportsmaster requested the use of an unmarked white van, a spare warehouse in the industrial district, and an experimental silent helicopter we, ah, acquired from Ferris Aircraft."

Naruto glanced up. "When did he request this?"

The secretary took a long drag from her cigarette and checked her phone again. "He paid for the warehouse up front last week. Said something about out of town friends coming in. The white van and copter we rented to him last night."

"There we have it then," said Kurama, "Sportsmaster set up a workshop in the warehouse, and then he used the copter and van to break in and out of Belle Reve."

"Where is the warehouse he requested?" asked Icicle.

"Near the wharf," said the secretary, showing her smartphone to Icicle.

He checked the map and nodded. "I know the place," he said, "Dad once tried to pull a heist in this city. He wanted to use the warehouse as a drop-off point."

Naruto arched an eyebrow. "Something went wrong, I take it?"

"He didn't ask Mr. Grundy for permission," said the secretary lazily, "He won't make that mistake again."

Grundy growled and folded his arms. Naruto raised an eyebrow and stood up. "Well, thank you Grundy," he said, "We'll be going now."

"No!" snapped Grundy, "You give Grundy present!"

Naruto stared at the zombie incredulously. "Run that by me one more time?"

"It's a respect thing," hissed Icicle, "Just give him one of your knives!"

Naruto took out a kunai and twirled it, handing it handle first to Grundy. "This what you're looking for, big guy?"

Grundy took the kunai and examined it with surprising expertise and care. After a few moments, he grunted and jabbed it into his shoulder, plunging it hilt deep into his undead skin. "Grundy like," he said, "Good present."

"Glad you think so," sighed Naruto, motioning for Icicle to stand.

"Thank you for your support, Grundy," said Icicle as he stood, "If we ever need your help again, we'll be sure to bring you another present."

Grundy grunted and motioned for them to leave. Icicle and Naruto left the office and made their way out of the mill onto the streets of New Orleans. "Well," said Naruto, "That was easy."

"The key is to use big words."

"How did a guy like that get to be the top capo in New Orleans?"

"Well, being pretty much invulnerable and immortal helps. Did you see how he stabbed himself? The guy feels no pain."

Naruto grumbled angrily. "You know how hard it is to make those things? They don't exactly sell them at your local green grocer you know."

"Sucks," said Icicle with a smirk, "You know what sucks more? Prison."

"Are you trying to make me feel sorry for you? Because it won't work."

"What's so wrong about what I did?" demanded Icicle, "I needed money. Other people had too much of it. I took what I needed to survive."

Naruto chuckled. "You also put security guards in the hospital, tried to freeze an entire bridge, and you were part of an attempted mass breakout."

"Means to an end."

"And there's where we differ," said Naruto with a sense of finality, "Now, you know where this place is?"

"Follow me." Icicle began to walk down the empty street and Naruto followed close behind.

"I like this kid. Lot of passion. Misguided and completely corrupted passion, but lots of passion."

"So," Naruto said, "You ever see…who was the girl Ms. Martian was pretending to be again?"

"Tuppence Terror," sighed Icicle dreamily, "Mon cheri."

"Yeah her. You ever see her again? I heard she was in Belle Reve."

"After the escape attempt, they permanently separated the guys from the chicks. No more contact with the ladies."

"Oh. Well that sucks."

"You have no idea."

Naruto paused. "For what it's worth, I'm sorry we played you like that."

"It's cool," grunted Icicle, "To be fair, I was trying to play you at the same time."

"How much further?"

"Two blocks more and then we take a left. Ten more blocks and it'll be on our left."

Naruto nodded. "Then we're taking the high roads." He took Icicle by the scruff of his neck and ran up the side of a nearby building.

"Whoa!" cried Icicle as Naruto threw him onto the roof, "Just how many powers do you have?!"

Naruto just shrugged and helped Icicle to his feet. He slung the villain over his shoulder and crouched down. "Hold on," he said as he shot forwards. With a mighty leap, he landed on the roof across the street. He jumped from rooftop to rooftop until he reached where Icicle had indicated. "That one?" Naruto pointed to a warehouse across the street as Icicle slid off his back.

"Yeah," said Icicle, "What do we do?"

"Espionage," said Naruto, "We do this my way."

"Fine," said the villain, "Then we should probably move in soon." He pointed up the street where a car was slowly rolling towards them. It parked on the curb next to the warehouse and the door opened.

"Sportsmaster," Naruto growled as the man exited the car and walked into the warehouse, a small briefcase under his arm, "Ivo must be inside. Let's move." Icicle nodded and Naruto slung him onto his back, taking another leapt over to the warehouse roof. Icicle hopped off and approached a nearby skylight. The ice that made up his fingers sharpened and he pressed them gently against the glass, cutting through it in a large circle before removing the glass and placing it by his side. "Stay here," whispered Naruto as he climbed through the hole, attaching himself to the ceiling of the warehouse with his chakra.

Below, Ivo was sitting amongst a myriad of large computers, joined by other familiar faces. Naruto frowned at Klarion and his cat and the Brain with his gorilla, all of them pacing (or in Brain's case, rolling) anxiously. Sportsmaster entered the room and dropped the briefcase in front of Ivo.

"Perfect," purred Ivo, taking out a large vial, "Klarion, Brain, I believe it is your turn."

"Ooh! Me first!" cried Klarion, grabbing the tube from Ivo. In his palm, it began to glow red as his magic took hold.

Ivo turned back to the briefcase and frowned. "What's this?" he asked, picking up a small vial of red liquid.

"A genetic sample," said Sportsmaster, folding his arms, "From Shinobi."

Naruto perked slightly Ivo examined the vial. "Oh? Is this from that little game the Joker played? I must say, he's quite clever for someone so insane. What am I supposed to do with it, though?"

"It's not for you," explained Sportsmaster, "It's for them." He pointed to Brain and Klarion. Klarion handed the glowing tube to the gorilla and Brain swiveled to work on the tube himself.

Klarion took the vial from Ivo and grinned in excitement. "Ooh! Goodie!" he said, shaking it lightly, "Perfect!"

"What's it for?" asked Ivo.

"Operation Cross-Over," said Klarion, tucking it into his jacket, "I need to reconstruct a perfect body for my friend's soul to transfer into. He gave me the signal a few weeks ago."

Sportsmaster grunted. "What signal?"

"Millions upon millions of souls," sighed Klarion in delight, "All entering the afterlife nearly simultaneously. Come New Year's Eve, when the connection between our worlds is at its strongest, one last soul will leave the other world and I'll pluck it down." He rocked on his heels and spread his arms wide. "Then it's just a matter of shoving that soul into the body I'm going to make with this DNA and voila! Instant inter-dimensional travel!"

"Huh," Sportsmaster shrugged as the Brain finished working on the tube.

"Ze Starro Tech is ready," he said mechanically, "By ze vay, Klarion, your friend, you are sure you can control him?"

Klarion burst into laughter. "Oh Brain," he chuckled, patting Brain's head affectionately, "Nobody controls Madara Uchiha, all you can hope to do is point him in the right direction."

Naruto gasped as he suddenly realized what they were saying, what they were planning. "No way!" he hissed.

"Impossible!" declared Kurama, "Nobody would be crazy enough to resurrect him!"

Suddenly, the warehouse door burst open and Artemis rolled in, drawing her bow. "Freeze!" she shouted.

Naruto dropped to the floor and landed in a crouch. "Good idea," he said, his eye turning red as he took in some of Kurama's chakra, "Icicle!" A wave of ice poured down from the ceiling and quickly enveloped the room. Naruto shot forwards and grabbed Artemis, pulling her out of the way as the villains were frozen in place, only their heads poking through the ice.

"Clever kid," sighed Klarion, "I don't suppose you heard us?"

Naruto jumped over to the Lord of Chaos and leaned down to look him in the eye. "Every word," he snarled, "You have no idea what you're doing."

"Oh, but I do," said Klarion with a sadistic grin, "And when he gets here, he's going to rip your head off!"

Naruto's gaze was downright murderous, but Klarion didn't even flinch. "You wouldn't dare," he said firmly.

"Try me," smiled Klarion, "But first, you'll have to catch me." With that, his body dissolved into steam and he vanished into thin air. Naruto looked around and saw that Ivo, Sportsmaster, Brain, and Brain's pet gorilla were also gone.

"What was that?" asked Artemis.

"I'll tell you later," sighed Naruto, "What're you doing here?"

"We were tracking Sportsmaster," she said, "But it looks like he got away."

"Yeah," sighed Naruto, "I think I need to go home."

. . .

"Let me be clear," said Kaldur firmly, "We failed today. It was partially my fault. It was my first time as field commander and I failed my team, but that is no excuse for the rest of your actions."

Naruto sat cross-legged on the floor of the Cave's main hall. "It's as I suspected," he sighed, "The Injustice League was just a front, a red herring."

"Since you are so eager to speak up," said Kaldur angrily, "Let me begin with you. Your mission was to discover what caused the security breach at Belle Reve. Not only did you fail to gather evidence that incriminates Warden Strange as the villain we now know he is, but you helped Icicle Jr. escape custody."

Naruto sighed. "Look, I'm not exactly proud of tonight, but-"

"But nothing, Naruto," Kaldur silenced him, "Moving on. Artemis, you purposefully led us astray to try and take Sportsmaster and Chesire alone."

Wally glared at the archer. "Were you really so insecure?" he asked quietly, "That you had to try and prove yourself by taking on the bad guys solo?" Artemis took a breath to try and defend herself, but closed her mouth and looked away. Wally snarled and walked away.

"So," asked Red Arrow, folding his arms, "How will you two betray us next time?"

"Enough," sighed Kaldur, rubbing his temples, "I must report to Batman. The rest of you, get some rest."

Naruto turned to head to his room. He also needed to write out a report to Batman, concerning his suspicions about Klarion trying to reanimate Madara and the tube he'd seen the villains working on in the warehouse. He intended to go to his room, but somehow he wound up outside of M'gann's room. Slowly, he knocked on the door.

"Oh, Naruto!" she said excitedly as she opened the door, "You're not going to believe what Conner, Zatanna, and I found today!" Naruto said nothing, but stepped into the room, pulling M'gann close and softly pressing his lips to hers. He backed her into her bed and they lay down. "Oh, it's gonna be that kind of night," she chuckled, "Okay, I could have some fun."

"Hold me," he begged softly in her ear before he started to trail kisses down her body, "Hold me like it's the end of the world."

. . .

Several hours later, Naruto was sitting on his bed. He was drenched in sweat from his activities with M'gann. His legs were crossed as he meditated on his predicament. He had written out his report and sent it to Batman, but he was still largely concerned. If Klarion truly intends to try to bring Madara into this world…

"Put it out of your mind, kit," snarled Kurama, "It's impossible. There's no chance of success with their plan."

We can't take that risk. Naruto stood up and shook slightly, sweat dripping off his body. He walked over to his shelf and retrieved the Hokage Scroll. I need to train. Learn more jutsu.

"Alright then," said Kurama, "What are you thinking? Are you ready to try opening the Inner Gates?"

Naruto looked down at his arms. He'd been increasing the weights on his limbs every week, but he still had a ways to go to be able to open the Inner Gates. Not yet, furball.

"The Super-Expansion Jutsu then? You could do an entire Ino-Shika-Cho formation by yourself."

The caloric intake alone for that jutsu would take me weeks. I need something I can learn fast.

"What about medical jutsu? That'd be useful."

Now there's an idea. I wonder if I'm suited to it.

"Mmm. Now that you mention it, probably not."

Naruto rolled his eye as he ran through the scroll. Most of the jutsu were unavailable to him. His body wasn't inhabited by insects, so the hidden jutsu of the Aburame Clane was useless. The Fire Styles of the Uchiha and Sarutobi Clans weren't for him and his lack of Byakugan made him ill suited for the Gentle Fist Taijutsu. There were many other jutsu on the scroll, but most of them were impossible for him to perform.

Wait a minute, he realized suddenly, You don't think…

"It's worth looking for."

Naruto scanned through the scroll again until he saw the kanji he was looking for. No way.

"Yes way. It's the perfect jutsu for you to learn, and you need to get started as soon as possible. You ready?"

Naruto clutched the scroll to his chest and closed his eye. Kakashi-sensei…Sasuke…I will honor you.

"Let's go, kit!" roared Kurama, "The Chidori awaits!"

. . .

Naruto walked into the living room and blinked in surprise. Artemis was in tears on the couch, Wally and Robin sitting solemnly on either side of her. Zatanna was standing in the corner, staring into the endless distance. Conner and M'gann were leaning against the island in the kitchen, looking over the team.

"What's up?" asked Naruto as he stepped in.

"S-someone died," sobbed Artemis.

Naruto looked up at the television. It was showing an animated movie where a tattered looking young man and a monkey were stuck in a cave. "Family?" he asked.

Wally looked up and sighed. On the screen, a large, blue character suddenly burst out of a brass cup. "Ten thousand years!" cried the character, "Will give you such a crick in the neck!"

Robin held up the remote and changed the channel. A happy-looking man was speaking into a radio microphone. "Gooooooood morning Vietnam!" he cried in delight.

The channel changed with a click of a button and a burst of static. A red robot was grinning on the screen. "I know this town like the back of my hand," the robot checked his hand and peered at it in curiosity, "Hey, that's new." A massive sledgehammer smashed into him and he soared off screen.

Click. A group of penguins were walking in a group. "I heard people wanting something," said one, putting his wing to his ear, "Me!"

Click. A teacher was making his students walk on their desks. "Boys, you must learn to find your own voice," he said, "The longer you wait to begin, the less likely you are to find it at all."

Click. There was a man on a talk show, walking past the host's desk. "I will walk now!" he called out, "And the cameraman's going 'where's he going now?'" He spoke in a funny voice and Naruto grinned as the man ducked and wove to avoid the camera.

Click. A young man was in a funny red outfit with a large, shiny triangle on his chest. "Orson, I don't know how much value I have in this universe," he said quietly, "But I do know I made a few people happier than they would've been without me. And as long as I know that, I'm as rich as I'll ever need to be." The man smiled a sad kind of smile. "I'll catch you on the rebound, your magnitude," he said to empty space and canned studio laughter. "Till next week!" he held his hands up to his ears and tweaked his ear lobes, "Nanu nanu!"

Robin clicked the remote one more time and the T.V. turned off as Artemis broke into a wave of fresh tears. "Family," said Robin softly, "Yeah, you could say that."

. . .

R.I.P. Robin Williams. We ain't never had a friend like you.