These foolish games are tearing me apart

And your thoughtless words are breaking my heart.

~Foolish Games, Jewel

Chapter 21

When Fire Turns to Ice

All he can see was a bright yet dark color, and it hurts. He muscles constricted and he moved his hand to his side. His eyebrows met in confusion to feel soft blades of grass in his palm. Without opening his eyes, the sunlight which struck him is definitely toasting his body hairs. It was then he reconciled his thoughts as his lids slowly opened and he found himself deserted in the middle of the forest with a nest of grass as his bed.

Ares looked around, mind in full query on what the hell had he been doing last night to end up trashed in this grassland. He grumbled to must have had a rough night, and portions of his muscles ached, pressed against a hard and stony surface. He thought how lucky his servants up in Olympus are to sleep in cushioned beds and furnished rooms while he, a god, spends his night on a grasshopper's playground. He groggily stood on his feet, and forced himself to walk but then he had to fall to the ground because of having double visions. The nerves on his head jolted continuously, and he pulled some of his hair to ease the throbbing.

The forest was familiar, though, and he let a few minutes play before he can connect the pieces together. He may not know what he had been doing last night but at least he knows the place where he woke up. The foot trail was familiar enough to lead him towards Thanea's village. He proceeded towards a narrow stream of clear cool water and caught a handful to splash it to his face. He repeatedly ran wet fingers through his hair and fixed himself. There was no sign whatsoever of what he had been up to, the night before. He was cleansed.

The sun was high, and he cursed himself for sleeping too long till midday break. But he felt too lazy to run to his duties back at his temple in Olympus. He'd rather play house with Thanea than listen to mortal prayers which can only send him yawning and picking on his ears with his pinky finger as he sits relaxed on his throne. As he neared the small gates of her house he peered if there was any sign that Thanea was in, and though he was not quite sure of the answer, he was too high to resist himself going in without any permission.

He raised his fist to knock, but immediately saw a distance between the edge of the door and the doorposts. It was open, and he welcomed himself in. Something fell to the ground whilst stepping inside, and it caught his attention. He bent to pick up the latch of the door and while it was between his fingers, his brows creased. The door can't be locked because the latch was broken. It hit him quickly and turned to any direction for Thanea, thinking that a robber might have had forced entry.

"Thanea!" he called out, twice, thrice, until he ran and desperately searched for her upstairs to her chamber and down to the fireplace in raw anguish.

A gagging sound made his feet jump towards the kitchen. There he found her, bent in the sink, her long dark hair messed up across her shoulders. Her face was low to touching the basin, and he watched helplessly but in shock when she jerked and held her stomach. He can hear the spoiled molasses drop from her mouth and splash against the sink hole. His face marred with distress and concern as he stepped closer towards her. Once more, she threw up and shivered with those little gagging noises which resembled whimpers.

Ares' eyes roamed around her for a minute, and noticed some drastic changes in her appearance. Her hair was quite unhealthy and dull, and her trembling wrists were somewhat thinner than before. It was obvious she was sick, and she was losing weight. A lot of weight. And maybe a lot more.

"Thanea..." his fingers didn't retaliate to touch her, and she didn't flinch one bit. Her head twisted and she wiped her mouth after spilling water on the pool of vomit and blood. She finished until it all went down the drain and faced him. He was backed, eyes moved with pity.

"My god..." he whispered in disbelief, seeing her panting as if there was no air around. His hand cupped the surface of her cheeks, once plump and pinkish, now sagged and pale. He ran a thumb on the base of her eyes which were shadowed with black, "...what happened to you?" The edge of her lips were still stained by fresh blood which he wiped with the same thumb. Her eyes were steadily staring at him in full color and red-rimmed, and watched his hands which were discovering her sudden transformation.

Ares slowly encircled his arms around her and was about to pull her close to him but was evenly stunned when she pushed him away and averted her direction. She limped a bit, holding on to anything she could put her fine weight for a while and he watched her with ridged brows. She wasn't like this before and he even questioned if this was Thanea.

"Thanea," he followed her to catch her hands which groped for posts to hold on.

"Go away," she whispered without looking at him and pulled her hand from his grip. He was confused a lot more. This wasn't Thanea. The same girl he knew would always wait for him and crush his neck with her dainty arms. The same girl whom he used to carry while she embraced him, and he would slowly lift her up and sway. Suddenly this same girl began to feel bitter towards him. And he couldn't understand.

"Wh-what happened, sweet heart?" he pulled her closed but then she immediately twitched and slapped her palm against his cheek. His eyes widened as his face fiercely diverted to one side. He slowly faced her as he touched the reddened flesh on his face.

"I said go away!" she screamed at him. Never before had he seen such hatred in her eyes and venom dripping from her voice. At once she held her stomach and her brows creased in pain. She rushed past him and towards the drain to release another set of bile-tasting heave. He still followed her, but all of a sudden his heart was crushed and he couldn't deny the tears which were beginning to surface on his eyes.

She poured more water and inhaled.

"Are you alright...?" he asked once more, wanting to caress those thinning shoulders but he withdrew his hand.

"Of course," she responded after her last inhaling. She filled a cup with water and consumed it hungrily. "Why did you come?"

He gave a bewildered laughter while his brows met, "What...of course I had to...wh—Thanea?"

"You didn't have to." She commented dryly and threw the cup on the sink. She leaned against the wall and embraced herself timidly, "just go."

"Can't you hear yourself? What on earth are you—"

"You're a god, Ares, for Zeus' sake!" her voice rose, stopping him once more, "You can have anyone! Your pick of women! Your pick of deities and nymphs!"

"Well I want to pick you," he cut her off.

She laughed sarcastically and shook her head, "Get hold of yourself Ares. You go up there and lay with anyone without least thinking about how I feel because? Because I can't see what damned things you are up to!"

"Than—"

"And I stay here," she pinched her voice in anticipation of tears, "I stay here lonely, just waiting for your arrival and I can't, I can never—never—meet anyone else because I know you can always see me from above and you know what I am doing down here. I know there are eyes watching over me." She exhaled and closed her eyes, "It's too much injustice how you can meet all the women you want to be with, and I have to stay here by myself, and when I have to be friends with anyone, then you come down and take them all away from me...just to keep me for yourself, is that it?"

Ares sighed and lowered his head. He couldn't believe these accusations, "Since we've been together, I've never seen...or lay down with any other woman but you. You know that." He took a step towards her, "You trusted me,"

"But you never trusted me." She replied.

"O-of course I do," he held her cheeks, "I love you..."

Ares searched for any spark in her eyes but there was nothing else he could read in them but disbelief and mockery. He had begun to question if all those moments they've spent together were mere facades and betrayed admiration.

"You do?" she glared before pushing his hands away from her, "maybe you think you do but you don't." She gave him an apathetic look before turning away, "leave me."

Ares was left with his jaw agape, his thundering heartbeats made him realize he just stopped inhaling. He followed her still, "Thanea, why is this happening all of a sudden...? What have I done?"

She immediately laughed and held her stomach to get hold of herself. He watched in perplexity as she leaned against the wall with that teasing laughter. As she breathed he can recognize how her collar bone had become too obvious and her skin sunk. He estimated Thanea had been fasting for three days, and the reddened rims of her eyes indicated mourning.

"Very funny, Ares." She stopped laughing and merely stayed on where she was, making him rooted to the floor. "You should be the god of comedy, you have such great talent of acting."

"I'm—I'm serious. I'm confused. I don't know what's happening..."

She rolled her eyes and pretended not to her as she brushed him off, "Leave me alone."

He rushed to her side with a bead of sweat rolling through his temples. Any minute longer, it would be followed by his tears. "Thanea please talk to m—"

"I said go away!" she furiously responded, and he was astonished to the highest degree. Once more, tears came flowing out of her eyes with plea and she pushed his chest with weakened hands, making her stumble to the floor. His body was shoved, and his eyes never left her but his muscles have became too dry to ever reach out and help her stand. She remained kneeling on the floor, sobbing with all her might. "Please, just go and never return..."

Even the mightiest warrior has a reason to chatter his teeth and a lone tear swept from his eye as he turned and walked slowly like the undead which arose from the grave. He never looked back for his mind was paralyzed and no other sound entered his ears. He pushed himself out of her house, eyes remained intact to the ground and lips parched. He continued to walk further away from her place until he reached a tree trunk to which he leaned his chest over. Words couldn't describe how his heart ached and his nerves contracted, seeing this haste of a change to the woman he loved most. He rested his forehead against the rough trunk and right there and then covered his face as he wept. The gods must be poking fun at him to ever see the one whom they fear most, trembling in grief because of love.

Ares summoned himself after releasing this raw agony, and rid himself out of all this mad desire for Athena. This must be the opportunity for him to lay her at peace. Athena and Thanea both hated him now, and there was no other chance to rectify this antagonism against him, paving way to justify why he should kill both of them. After all, that was his task and it was his fault why he would be enduring this depth of pain. If only he had finished her off sooner then this wouldn't have happened. After slaying her then he planned to seclude himself out of the nest of the gods and slowly disappear to live the life of a mortal and put all his past behind him.

He blinked many times before walking towards the forest and descend towards Hades' realm to vindicate the god of death. Before his blended with the forest then his reddened eyes caught something after hearing a loud weep.

At the hill not far from where he was, Ares saw a group people all clad in black and grey, walking in slow procession. The women had veils over their heads. Four men, all in black tunics and heads bowed low, carried a cot: each man at the corner. In the cot was a body and Ares narrowed his eyes to see what was in there clearly. The body was wrapped in pure white cloths, and even from afar Ares can smell the spices which came from the bathing of the corpse. He watched steadily as one of the women, whom he can identify as Phoebe, ran towards the body and knelt. The four men carrying the cot had to place it to the ground in respect. Phoebe lamented greatly, her weeping voice clearly heard. She hovered over the body and wept at its lifeless chest, her hands shaking its shoulders as if it was only sleeping and ready to awake.

Ares thought it might be her husband whom she was weeping for. They were newly weds, and he even attended their wedding. It was the same night when fate revealed who he really was to Thanea.

His eyes flew open, though, when her husband rushed through the crowd and held her shoulders to raise her up from the corpse. Phoebe didn't succumb at first and remained grieving for the body until her husband embraced her and took her away from the cot. The procession resumed and Ares can see Phoebe's mother beside her. Her father had long been dead. And then he questioned himself.

Where is Ethan?

A/N: Whew. Reviews? :D