Josephine paced back and forth in a mixture of utter dread and something of an anger. She couldn't believe how stupid the two of them had been, duelling her fiancé to protect her. Surely they both knew that she could take care of herself, that she wasn't a child that needed them to stand between her and the world. But more than that, she was scared. They had rushed him to the nearest healer in the city, who had told them he had been poisoned by one of the deadliest toxins in the known world, and hadn't known what to do. Lord Ortranto had cheated, poisoning his blade to ensure Cantis' death.
Now they were at Skyhold, waiting anxiously. Mara was the best healer in Southern Thedas, or at least among their ranks. She now had to entrust Cantis' life to the Warden. Leliana had tried again and again to reassure her as to Mara's skill in healing magic, insisting that she had cured everything from the Quiet Death, to the Taint itself. But still she worried, so much so that she couldn't even find the amount of emotion to be angry at Leliana for having perverted her request to this level.
"Josie..." Leliana tried again, apology and regret in her tone. She hadn't known it would end like this, truly. Cantis was a master swordsman. How was she supposed to know he would be injured to this level? Not to mention she hadn't given the possibility of poison a thought. This was all her fault. She should have duelled the man herself, or at least done something in the fight before it ended up like this...
"Leliana?" Josephine hissed, turning to her, the gaze in her eyes serious enough to stare down a dragon. "Please. Shut up." Leliana nodded, closing her mouth as Josephine resumed her terrified pacing.
Finally, Mara came from the other room several minutes later, looking utterly exhausted, her skin pale and her hair tinted grey from the amount of magic she had expended saving his life. "How is he?" Josephine asked, speaking quickly as her mind flooded with possibilities of what might be the answer. "Is he okay? Is he alive? Please tell me good news."
Mara sighed in exhaustion, collapsing in a chair adjacent to them. "He's stable, awake and responsive. He'll have a lot of trouble moving for a few hours, and be in a lot of pain a week or so, especially once the salve I gave him wears off." She nodded slowly, relaxing back into the chair and closing her eyes. "Leliana, find wherever the hell that Antivan got that poison, and destroy every last drop of it. I never want to treat that nightmare ever again." Leliana nodded, and Josephine started for his bedside. "Josephine?" Mara spoke up, and she turned. "You're rightfully mad. But please, I nearly killed myself saving his life. Do try not to kill him." Josephine nodded grimly, and went inside.
Cantis was heavily bandaged across his entire body, save for his face which was frozen in an expression of pain and sadness. "Hey… Josie." He groaned, sitting up a little at the cost of severe pain. His speech was slurred and pained. "How's… things?"
"Don't give me that." She sat next to him, folding her arms. "Before anything else, I have to know. Why? Why do something so rash, so irresponsible, so… so stupid? Everything we've built, everything that we've suffered for… why risk it all? The Inquisition needs you! I need you. You almost died! Why?"
"Because I love you!"
Josephine was taken aback, moving away as she tried to process the words and involuntary tears gathered at the edges of her eyes as the meaning took hold. He… did? Of course he did. After everything he had said and done for her, all it took was to hear it once for her to realize it as an irrefutable and obvious truth. After all those late nights that turn into early mornings of simply talking to one another, of laughing and smiling, of the highs and lows they had spent with one another. The way his eyes sparkled when he looked to her, to the foolish smiles they shared. She was struck mute by the majesty of the revelation, and there now stood a yearning deep in her soul that begged, demanded to hear the love in his voice, to see the happiness in his eyes, to feel him look at her like there was no one and nothing else in the world.
"You… you do?"
"Yes, Josephine." He murmured warmly, making her swoon, her heart fluttering inside of her. "I love you so much. I-I… yo-you mean… everything to me." It was rare to hear him stammer, at least around most people where he tried to keep his guard up. He smiled weakly, eyes wet, and she was certain her heart would stop at any moment. For a moment, one impossible moment, the armour that he wore around this heart, the emotion shell that he kept so strong to stop himself from hurting those around him was gone. For her. "You are the only beautiful thing in my life, the only thing I have to live for, Josephine. You, and nothing else. You bring me comfort, and you bring me hope. All I want is to close my eyes and melt away in your arms. That's why. Because… because I couldn't lose you too. Everything I love has died or left me, and I wasn't going to just let that happen to you too. I… I love you so much."
His words warmed her heart completely, bringing the most ridiculous smile to her face as she realized how true it was, how foolish she was to have not realized it sooner. The things he did, he did because he loved her. Why else would he have done this? Tears of absolute joy streamed down her face, ruining her makeup, but she couldn't find a reason to care. He loved her. He loved her. He loved her. And there was only one possible response to that.
"I love you too." Josephine whispered, her eyes crinkling upwards in happiness, in joy, in bliss. Without thinking to the implications, she threw herself into his arms on the bed, and their lips met. It was awkward, kissing him laying in this medical bed, but they made it work. He moved his arms around her at great pain, and the whole of the world faded away into obscurity. All that's left was them as a single being, lips meeting for a glorious, amazing moment. He tasted of sea and oak, strong enough to hold her in his arms, to keep her from ever falling to the world, but gentle enough that it was romantic and loving. She held him tightly, forgetting his pain, feeling warm, happy and safe. So safe.
His kiss was fierce, passionate, almost possessive, but somehow sweet and tender at the same time. Never in Josephine's wildest dreams did she ever imagine she could be so lucky.
She pulled back for a moment, gasping for air. Cantis didn't say anything, just smiled up at her, his teary eyes shining in the light. Here, in his arms, being so incredibly loved and accepted, Josephine knew what she had to say. Those magical, wondrous two words of Antivan. The ones she had always wanted to say to someone she loved, the ones she had always longed to whisper to the love of her life, but never loved anyone enough to utter.
"Ti amo." She whispered with a heart swelling with love and passion. And with those words, the depth of her affection had been admitted, even if only to herself since he didn't know Antivan. She had admitted that she loved him, deeper and purer than anything Ferelden can convey. That she trusted all of her hopes and dreams in him, that she needed him in her future and that he had left an imprint on her very heart. That she can't imagine her own life without him. "Sei tutto per me, ti amo."
"Josie?" He was still smiling, but his face was now a small, well meaning grimace. "I know it's not terribly romance, but could you move? This… kinda really hurts."
"Oh!" She jumped back, putting a hand over her lips as she climbed back, having forgotten herself. "Of course. I'm so terribly, I just-"
"You're okay." He chuckled. "Just crippling injuries and all." Josephine sat back in the chair next to his bedside, and laid a gentle, loving hand over his. "I… don't know what to do now. Am I supposed to take you out to dinner now? Flowers and badly written poetry?"
Josephine giggled, giving his hand a squeeze. "I think it's a little late for that. We should let your injuries heal, at the very least. But beyond that… I don't know. I've never… never been in a situation like this before."
"You've never been with anyone before?" He asked quietly, and she shook her head. "Took me a long time for me. I was only a few years younger than you when I met Liam, and we never… really had this talk since things with us just kind of… happened." He smiled and shook his head. "I'm sorry, you probably really don't want to hear about my old husband. I should focus on you. New life, new love and all that."
"It's okay." Josephine smiled back at him, resuming the same silly, happy smile she had before having hurt him. "I can't expect you to forget your old life. You were married for a decade, and had a child. I can't just expect you to forget about that. Just… promise me it won't affect us?"
"Of course not." Cantis squeezed her hand comfortingly. "I love you. I love you. It's a different way of love from him, and Abigail, I suppose, given how different you are from them, but no less real. I wouldn't be here right now if I didn't love you." His smiled melted a little, and he quirked his head at her. "I… there's something I have to tell you, if that's alright."
Josephine's smile faded in turn, replaced by a look of concern. That… didn't sound good. But, from his expression, it looked like it mattered a lot to him, so she tried to smile again and nodded. "Of course, Ti Amo. You can tell me anything, anything at all."
Cantis smiled a little, feeling reassured, eyes never leaving hers. "It's… hell, I don't know how to say this. I went my entire marriage without saying this to Liam, never said it to anyone. But… you have a right to know." He took a deep, shuddering breath, and nodded to himself, as if working himself up to say it. "Josie, I… I don't feel attracted, sexually, to… anyone. I've never once in my life wanted to have sex with someone. It… kind of even makes me sick, to think about doing such things with someone." He swallowed hard, giving a small, trembling smile at her. "I… hope you're not mad."
Josephine licked her lips nervously, looking at him curiously. "Of course I'm not." She reassured, squeezing the hand clasped in hers once more. "But… I'm afraid I don't understand. You don't feel attracted to people like that? Does… does that mean you don't like the way I look?" She bit her lips. Maker, but she hoped that wasn't how he meant it. She was conscious enough of how she looked already. That would be… devastating.
"Of course not." He reassured, smiling a little wider at her. "Josie, you're gorgeous, beautiful. It's just… just the sex. I think you're amazing, in every way, but when I look at you, I want is to take you in my arms, to kiss your lips and ensure that nothing bad ever happens to you again, to make your life perfect. I don't… you know, want to pull off your dress and… do anything to you. What I want is romance and love, nothing so… animalistic." His smile left him again, his hand shaking as it was entwined with hers. "Is… is that okay?"
Josephine nodded sweetly, smiling still. "Of course, Ti Amo. I love you. That is unconditional, and irrevocable. Whatever you say, whatever you do, that won't change." She held up his hand, and kissed it gently. "Does this change the way you feel about me?"
"Of course not." Cantis shook his head decisively. "Everything I've done for you, everything I've said, I did without thinking about you like that. I didn't duel this Antivan lord and wind myself up like this for nothing."
"Would it change how you feel about me if I said the same?" She continued, raising an eyebrow in the same way she did whenever she began to win an argument or debate with the other diplomats. He shook his head once more. "I'm attracted that way to both men and women alike. Does that change how you feel about me?" He shook his head again. "Then it doesn't change anything about the way I feel about you, either." She leaned in and kissed him on the forehead, feeling his smile that broke out as she did. "I love you, and that's not dependent on anything other than you remaining yourself."
Cantis smiled, eyes watering as he squeezed her hand tightly. "Josie, I… I" He teared, smiling. "I suffered through ten years of marriage, forcing myself to sleep with him, because I was scared, terrified of what he might say. Of being abandoned. I… you are… you are so wonderful, Josie. I… I don't know what to say. Except… except that I love you, so, so very much."
"I love you too." She smiled back, leaning over to kiss his forehead, and then his lips. "Now, get some rest, Ti Amo. I'll bring you some dinner and wine later, assuming you feel up to it?" He smiled and nodded, still having trouble to speak in joy. "It will have to do until we can go to a real dinner together. I love you."
"I love you too, Josie. So much."
"I still can't believe that you wound up wearing the dress I told you to get!" Leliana laughed. She, Mara and Morrigan were all sitting in the main hall, laughing and reminiscing of their times from the Blight. "I tried so hard to get you to wear that!"
"It wasn't because of you!" Morrigan folded her arms, but still smiling good naturedly. It was nice, being back with these two. Different as they were, these were some of the only people in the whole world that she knew, and they were… familiar. "It was Kieran's idea."
"Suuure it was." Mara laughed, her eyes sparkling happily at the socialization. It had been so long since they had done something like this. "You just don't want to admit Leliana has fashion sense, do you?"
Morrigan opened her mouth to dispute that, but the doors were thrown open suddenly, rain and thunder crashing outside as a long figure entered from the darkness.
An elf strode in, wearing shining white armour with a massive frame of a mirror on her back.
"Where is he?" Merrill asked. "Where is the Inquisitor?"