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I have to admit that I'm not too happy with this chapter. Not that it's bad because I obviously still thought it was good enough to post it but I think it's kind of the most boring one I've written so far. let's hope you disagree.

Chapter 25

An intense week had passed during which I spend all my free time with Wayne, working on my resistance against Veritaserum in between detention with McGonagall. Even though it was getting better, Wayne was right. I was nowhere near capable of lying to Umbridge without being obvious about lying. But the plan had been set in motion and she had noticed that me and Harry were on speaking terms again. I was dreading the moment she would call me to her office.

A benefit of spending all this time on the Veritaserum project was that I barely had time to miss Cedric. At least that was supposed to be a benefit. But even though I was constantly occupied with lots of things, I somehow still found time to yearn for Cedric's presence. I hadn't spoken to him at all, mostly because I had no idea what to say to him. I didn't even know if he would want to listen. What I did know was that this time around it was my turn to make the first move and I had no idea how to do it. So far Cedric had always taken the lead and made it easier for me to follow in his footsteps. But to make prints of my own, that was hard beyond compare.

The Easter holidays had started and while I intended to spend that time on my project with Wayne and try to figure out how to make things better between me and Cedric, Granger had other plans. She insisted I spend all my time preparing for the Owls just like she thought Harry and Weasley should be doing. I avoided her, even more then usually, because every time she did manage to catch up with me, she pressured me to get behind my books. Not exactly pleasant conversation.

Harry was also still acting weird. He asked me all these strange questions about our parents, mostly dad that hardly made any sense. If I didn't know any better, I'd say Harry is trying to write a book on him. And whenever I tried to get him to talk to me, he shut me out. And I didn't have time to worry about him. I was busy with all the previous things.

To make things even worse, a notice was pinned in the common room that demanded the attention of all the fifth years.

CAREERS ADVICE

As if I didn't have enough things on my plate yet with Cedric, the Veritaserum, lying to Umbridge, doing my horrid duties as a member of the Inquisitorial Squad, Quidditch practice, Harry's strange behaviour but now I also had to talk about the future with the Head of my House. I know it's a meeting where you can ask for her advice but I still had no idea where to start. Who thinks about the future anyway when the world is about to be plunged into a war? Of course the world doesn't know that yet but still… I don't think McGonagall will accept staying alive and making sure Harry's safe as my future plan.

I found Harry and his friends that weekend sifting through all the pamphlets on future careers in the common room. I wonder if they're struggling with this as much as I am. I wanted to join them and ask but I was supposed to meet up with Wayne now and that was slightly more important.

It was the next Monday I was supposed to sit down with McGonagall. The students came in alphabetically thus meaning I was right before Harry. We were sitting in front of her office, on the ground, waiting for her to call me in.

"What are you going to say?" I turn to him.

I had barely spoken to him these past days and we never really spoke about our future careers before. I had no idea what my brother wanted to do with his life.

"I think I'll try my shot at auror," He says.

"Following in dad's footsteps?" I smile. "I should have known."

Harry and dad are very much alike though not as much as me and dad. Harry has his looks but when it comes to his character, he's more like our mother. Kind, forgiving, though not patient at all. Harry is usually glad whenever someone mentions a resemblance to our father. But right now he looks as if I almost insulted him.

"Harry?" He looks up at me when I say his name. "Did something happen between you and dad? Because lately you've had very strange reactions whenever he's brought up."

Maybe they had been in some sort of fight even though I can't see what that would have been about. But something clearly happened to cause this reaction in Harry.

"It's complicated," He sighs.

"We've got time for you to explain it. Parvati went in there with at least twenty possible plans for a future career. She's not getting out of the office before sunset."

"I also don't want to talk about it."

"Too bad, Harry. You've been acting like the depressed version of you these last few weeks and I would like to know why."

"You're one to talk. You've been moping as well."

"I was not moping." I cross my arms in front of my chest and glare at the ground.

Fine, I was moping but at least I knew why I was. I have no idea why Harry's been doing the same thing.

"Does it have something to do with Cedric? Are you guys in a fight?"

"Don't change the subject," I huff. "Even if he and I were in a fight, which we are, it's none of you business."

"Neither is my thing with dad."

"He's my dad as well. I think it is my business."

We weren't getting anywhere with this conversation.

"I saw something," Harry eventually says.

"When?" I ask him gently, not wanting to ruin things now that he was finally talking about it.

"About a month ago during one of my lessons with Snape."

What could he possibly have seen that was somehow involved with our dad and had gotten Harry so upset? All they do during those lessons is sift through Harry's memories.

"Okay…"

"I accidentally saw one of Snape's memories. It was of his time at Hogwarts and dad was in it as well."

"So? We already knew they went to school together, they were even in the same year."

I don't see how any of this was a revelation.

"What we didn't know was how much they hated each other."

"Hate might be a strong word but it's not that hard to figure out they didn't get along. Just look at the way they talk to each other now. Why would it have been any different at Hogwarts? Snape is Snape. That should say enough. And dad was popular, charming, good with girls. He was the exact opposite of Snape. It's called jealousy."

"No, it's called bullying."

"Bullying?" I cock an eyebrow at my brother who is really getting too worked up about this.

"Yes, dad was Snape's tormentor!"

"Tormentor?" I snort. "Teenagers can be vicious, just look around the castle."

"This wasn't just two guys teasing each other. If you could have seen the memory as well, you wouldn't say that. Dad hung Snape in the air upside down in just his underwear. And he loved humiliating him."

"Dad was just a teenager, Harry."

I get that it makes him look at our father in a different light but it's not because Harry didn't like the boy our dad had been, that he cannot respect and love the man he is today.

"I just…" He sighs helplessly. "Dad was mean and cruel and he didn't care. He liked being that guy and had fun doing it. I know people say you and him are very alike but I never expected for him to be so-"

"- like me." I finish the sentence. "You think I'm cruel and mean and like humiliating people."

He doesn't apologise, he doesn't even look sorry. I know I am by no means a nice girl but I am not cruel. I do not take pleasure in making other people miserable.

"Miss Potter?"

The door to McGonagall's office opens and after saying goodbye to Parvati, she calls me into her office.

"Harry can go first," I say softly.

I most certainly don't feel like talking about the future now that my brother has pointed out exactly how he feels about me.

"It's in alphabetical order, miss Potter." She point out.

"We have the same last name! It's still in the same order. I just think he should go first."

When she just gives me a stern look and Harry makes no intention to get up, I glare at him and tell him to get a move on. Eventually he steps into the office and McGonagall reluctantly closes the door behind them.

The second I'm by myself in the hallway, I get up and walk away. The future can wait, right now I just want to punch something or someone.

Well, punching people or destroying things is against the rules in Hogwarts so I had to settle for a few laps on my broom to clear my head. Harry's words had upset me. I know when it comes to me and my brother, I'm the one with the biggest admiration for the sibling but he honestly caught me by surprise when he called me cruel. I am a lot of things but that never crossed my mind.

"Hey, Potter!"

Hearing someone call my name, makes me look down and only now realise the entire Ravenclaw Quidditch Team is staring up at me.

"We have the field today," The captain says impatiently.

"I'm not stopping you from joining me," I call down at the prat.

"Nice try, Potter, but with the game against your House coming up, I won't risk you spying on us."

"Paranoid much?" I grumble but still land and get off my broom.

I am about to walk away from the pitch, back to my common room when one of the players on the team catches up with me.

"Is there something you want?" I cock an eyebrow at the sixth year Ravenclaw girl in front of me.

"Actually, there is something I want to talk to you about." She smiles shyly.

For some reason she seems a bit nervous. I don't see why though. Maybe it is something rather important she wants to discuss with me.

"I was just wondering what the deal was between you and Cedric Diggory."

"What do you mean?" I ignore the clenching of my gut that her mentioning his name to me caused. I don't think I like where this is going.

"Whole of Hogwarts know you guys were dating but ever since the last Hogsmeade trip, you haven't been spotted together. So I was wondering if you broke up."

"You would like that, wouldn't you?" I narrow my eyes at her. "I'm sure that's the reason you're so eager to hear my answer because with me out of the picture, you might have shot with him."

"Really? You think I have a chance?" She beams.

What a tart.

"No, you do not! Because me and Cedric aren't separated. Still very much a couple, thank you," I bite.

"Oh, but I thought…" She wavers. "That means you're on the verge of a break-up, right? Since you don't talk anymore."

Is she stupid!? What part of 'we're still together' didn't she get?

"It's none of your business and if I catch you anywhere near my boyfriend, I'm breaking your nose."

I storm away from the pitch and the horrible girl angrily. Though I should be grateful to her for one thing. She made me realise that I can no longer sit this one out. It is time to take action or I might risk losing Cedric. And there is no way I'm letting that happen.

I skip dinner for three reasons. The first one being that I do not wish to be anywhere near Harry right now. What he said to me earlier today had upset me, yes, but even more than that, it made me realise that to Harry I will be nothing more than the sister he so desperately doesn't want to resemble. And that hurt more than anything else. Maybe in order for me to protect Harry, I should put some distance between us. The second reason for skipping dinner was McGonagall. After I missed the meeting I was supposed to have after Harry's, I was sure she would be pissed at me, not to mention disappointed that I seemingly wasn't taking my future seriously. I would keep avoiding that woman as long as I possibly could. And last but not least; Cedric Diggory. I needed to talk to him and rather sooner than later. If only I could just figure out what to say to him. I tried writing it down but so far all that has gotten me is a trash bin full of scrabbled parchment. I wouldn't really call that successful.

It was the next day that I realised I was truly stuck. I couldn't talk to Cedric. It was as if some unseen force was holding me back. My eyes continuously followed him on the Marauders' Map but I just could not face him in person.

"Danny! You're supposed to ask me a question, remember?"

My thoughts are rudely interrupted by an annoyed Wayne who is still waiting for me to question him while he's under de influence of the only potion that seems to matter these days.

"Sorry, what were you saying?" I turn my attention away from the map next to me and back to my friend.

"Your mind is clearly not very present today. What were you looking at anyway?" He leans over my shoulder to take a look at the map as well.

His eyes soon find the name mine have been focused on the entire time. He frowns at it before looking back at me.

"Again?" He sighs. "If you so desperately miss him then why don't you just go talk to him?"

"And say what?" I whine. "I would love for nothing more than to go up to him and say the magic words that will make things between us go back to the way they were before but I don't know what those words are."

"Then don't talk to him but at least stop staring at the map."

I want to close the map just like Wayne suggested when I catch the name of the person who hasn't been very far away from Cedric's presence these days. Lori McDougall has clearly been taking advantage of the situation between me and her eternal crush. I let out a desperate sigh when I see them both sitting close to each other in their common room.

"Danny?" Wayne hesitantly says to me.

"I'm losing Cedric." I turn back to my friend, showing him with my eyes just how desperate I've been feeling these days. "Despite how scared I was in the beginning of his feelings for me and mine for him, not having him is what's truly frightening."

"Then go get him back."

"I don't know how," I whisper.

"But you know what he wants to hear."

Yes, an apology.

"I can't say that. What use is it to get back into his good graces, when I have to lose a part of myself to do so?"

"Then tell him what you want him to hear." Wayne shrugs.

"How is that helpful? Last time he called me nuts and got away from me as quickly as possible."

I had told Wayne what had happened with Cedric at Hogsmeade. He would have found out eventually with Veritaserum but I had wanted to tell someone about it and by circumstances, he was the only one who knew everything preceding the event.

"You two need to find a compromise here and the first step to doing so is making it clear to him what you want from him. So what do you want from him?"

"I want… I need for him to love me."

"He does."

"Every part of me, maybe even more the crazy parts. I need to know if he still feels the same way about me after realising I'm not as perfect as he's made me out to be in his head."

"So go ask him that."

"What if he says no?" I whisper barely audible.

What if he indeed says no? My whole world would come crashing down because without Cedric in it, it's fairly empty.

"Well, he can't say yes unless you ask him." Wayne points out.

"Right…"

He was right. The only way to put me out of this misery or give me back my happy vibes, was to talk to Cedric. No matter what his answer is at least I can finally stop wondering.

"Fine, I'll talk to him tonight," I sigh.

I was on my way to do that, I really was. But then suddenly I am cornered by Harry in front of the Great Hall.

"Did you hear?"

"I don't know what you're talking about and I was kind of on my way to do something important." I walk past him.

"Can't it wait?"

"It can't. I've been postponing it for way too long."

"I just wanted to ask you if you knew that Fred and George are gone."

That stops me in my tracks. What is he talking about? I spoke to them yesterday morning.

"What do you mean with gone?"

"They left Hogwarts, dropped out of school so they can start the shop they've always been talking about. They left a swamp in the middle of the fifth floor of the east wing."

"Since when? And how come I don't know this?" I give my brother my full attention now, all forgetting about the Golden Boy I had been dying to talk to.

"I don't know how you haven't heard yet. It's all people are talking about. They left yesterday, right after my career's advice with McGonagall which was attended by Umbridge for some reason, then-"

"Wait, what?! Why was Umbridge there?"

That meeting is supposed to be between the student and the Head of the House. Our new Headmistress had no business being there.

"I don't really know, probably to make sure McGonagall wouldn't encourage me to go for an Auror's career which she did. Umbridge seems to be quite set on destroying my future. But you know that, of course. She attended yours as well, right?"

"What makes you think that?

"Because McGonagall told her she didn't appreciate Umbridge being there because she wanted to know what mine and your future plans were. You were supposed to be in there before me, remember? So she was at yours as well, right?"

Maybe she was. I wouldn't know, I was the one who didn't show up for it.

"I didn't go." I admit.

"To career's advice?" Harry frowns.

I nod.

"But I thought that was mandatory?"

"It is."

"Then why would you skip out on something like that?"

"Because I don't have any plans for the future and you had just called me cruel and vicious. That sort of threw me off," I snap.

He looks at me in shock. Did he really think I would have been left unfazed by what he had said to me before entering McGonagall's office?

"I'm sorry, Danny. I shouldn't have said that," He eventually says.

"But you did mean it."

He remains silent. And by now I have figured out that Harry's silence means I'm right.

"I talked to dad, Remus and Sirius."

"How?" I frown.

Harry had made it clear before that whatever was on his stomach concerning our father, couldn't be fixed through letters.

"Floo call." He shrugs.

"Umbridge is watching every fire place." I point out.

And I know the three of them are momentarily staying at the headquarters of the Order. If Harry contacted them through the fire place that would mean Umbridge knows about the Order and that's supposed to remain a secret organisation. Harry wouldn't be that stupid.

"Not her fire place."

"Did you get caught?"

It really was a stupid idea.

"No, Fred and George were the perfect decoy. Though I didn't think they would use that moment to announce their departure to the entire school. But at least I got the chance to talk to dad and now that I have, I'm not worried anymore. He was a stupid teenager and grew out of that behaviour."

"How is that any different than what I told you?"

"It had to come from him." He shrugs. "But now I realise that it's also something you'll eventually grow out of."

Did he really just say that?

"I'll grow out of it?" I hiss at him. "My personality isn't something I want to grow out off!"

"But you were upset when I mentioned it to you."

"I was upset because you called me cruel! I resort easier to nasty comments than the average person but you made me sound like a child ripping out the wings of a butterfly for fun. There is a big difference between mean and cruel and if you don't know that, this conversation is useless."

"But-"

"I don't have any problems sleeping at night, Harry. Despite your opinion, I quite like the person I am. I don't want to change because the people I love want me to. If you can't accept me for me, then maybe you should just leave me alone."

I don't know if I'm saying this little speech really to Harry or if it is more destined for Cedric's ears. But it was still very relevant.

I don't give him another chance to find a poor excuse. I walk back in the direction I came from, away from my Golden Boy. Maybe I didn't need to hear his answer for me to know it after all. If my own brother can't love me for me than how can I possibly expect Cedric to do that?

Now that I had a very good idea of what Cedric's answer to my question would be, I decided I was rather content to keep avoiding him. At least this way I could continue to hold on to the idea of still being his girlfriend. Can't do that when he officially breaks up with me. That's why I almost have a heart attack when I see him walking in my direction the next day in the hallways with a look of determination on his face. Oh no, this is it. The break-up.

I am all alone in the hallway with no one to distract Cedric for me. And even though it is a bit crowded, I can't possibly escape him when he's already so close and seems determined to talk to me.

"Hi."

He was standing right in front of me for the first time in weeks and when he greets me, I come up blank.

"I need to talk to you," He says.

"N-now?"

"Yes." He nods.

"I have class."

Thank God for Defence Against the Dark Arts. That's the first time I've said that this year.

"I'm sure you can skip it this one time. It's probably not the first one."

"I…"

I couldn't come up with a reason not to fast enough. I can't really say I don't want to talk to him because I'm absolutely terrified he'll break up with me.

"I've waited three weeks for you to come talk to me. You've had your chance, now we're doing this my way."

"I was going to talk to you yesterday." I admit to him.

I didn't want him to think I hadn't realised that this time it had been my turn to make the first move and that I didn't try. I did.

"But you didn't."

I shake my head because he's right.

"Because of Harry?"

I look up at him in surprise.

"How could you possibly know that?" I frown.

"I saw you in the Great Hall yesterday. You looked like you were on your way to me when Harry stopped you and after that conversation, you didn't approach me. It's not that hard to figure out. What did he say to you that made you change your mind?"

"It's none of your business." I get back into my defensive mode.

"Right, because nothing concerning you is ever any of my business," He says annoyed.

"Well, last time I told you something I didn't think you should hear, you ran out on me so excuse me if I'm reluctant to tell you anything personal."

"This is not about you telling me something personal. This is about you hiding things from me in the first place and it then turning out to be something completely mental."

"I'm sorry you can't handle certain aspects of my life but that is exactly why I don't tell you about them."

I hadn't expected for us to fight about this. I figured he would do it quickly and clean. This makes me almost delusional enough to think maybe he didn't come here to break up with me.

"It's not because I can't handle those things that I walked away," He says, surprisingly calm all of the sudden.

"It isn't?" I frown.

Now I'm really confused.

"I was just taken by surprise with how it made me feel." He admits.

"Like you don't love me? Or at least not every part of me?"

"What?" He gives me a confused look like he really has no idea what I'm talking about. "Is that why you haven't spoken to me these past few weeks?"

"I wasn't too eager to hear you break up with me," I huff.

I expected him to tell me that I was right about that and we should probably not see each other anymore. I didn't at all expect him to give me that sweet smile of his that always makes me feel a little weak in the knees.

"Silly girl." He smiles.

He puts a hand on each cheek and presses a gentle kiss to my lips. When he pulls away he looks at me as if expecting some kind of reaction.

"I'm really confused now."

"I am not breaking up with you, Danny."

"You're not?" I frown.

"Of course not. I don't think I could ever walk away from you but it's nice to know you think I can."

"Still confused."

If he hadn't been thinking of a way to end things then why did I just go though all those insecurities these last weeks?

"Remember when you told me you could forgive me for everything except cheating and killing?"

I nod my head though I didn't see what that had to do with anything.

"I figured that the same would be true for me, that there were some things I couldn't forgive you as well."

"Like promoting the use of an unforgivable curse?"

"I don't care. At first I was a bit angry and worried because you have no sense of self-preservation. But after cooling down, I realised it really didn't matter to me."

"And that's why you didn't talk to me?" I frown, still very much confused. He's just make things even more complicated for me to understand.

"I love you. We both know that. But realising that I love you completely unconditionally was a bit surprising and worrisome for me. And to think you could start the apocalypse and I would still love you with all my heart was-"

"Frightening." I finish the sentence for him.

"Yeah." He nods.

"That's kind of funny," I laugh out loud.

"What?"

"You were frightened by your feelings for me. It sounds kind of familiar though usually it's the other way around."

I thought that was kind of hilarious but I can see why he would disagree with me on that.

"Okay, so not funny," I say when Cedric gives me a very annoyed look for laughing with his confusing and frightening feelings. "But where does that leave us? Are we okay now?"

"I don't see why we wouldn't be." He shrugs.

"So all this was for nothing?"

"Not nothing, Danny. I'm still kind of upset with the things you do."

"But nobody actually gets hurt." I defend my decisions which I still was not going to apologise for.

"No one but you."

"Huh?"

"Like I've said before you have no sense of self-preservation and will most likely end up hurting yourself with those reckless decisions you make."

"They're not reckless."

Most of my plans are very well thought out.

"But they are dangerous. Not to anyone else because you have their backs but they are to you. I care about you so much, Danny. It would really hurt me to see you get yourself in a dangerous situation and it also pains me that you don't feel the same way about yourself."

"I don't purposely get myself in trouble." I try to defend myself.

"Danny," He sighs and tenderly pushes a lock of hair out of my face. "Will you please just admit that you put yourself in a bad position more often than not and you need someone to get you out of it sometimes."

"Are you offering?"

"I'm not. I'm demanding. Let me in and depend on me more. I want you to depend on me. And don't come with that stupid excuse that I'm Head Boy and I'll only just rat you out because when have I ever done that? I even covered for you when you poisoned me."

He has a point. He's always kept my secrets. Of course he never knew all of them. But maybe depending on him more often and telling him more things doesn't mean I have to give away every secret. I most definitely won't be telling him about the strange connection I have with my twin brother that even Dumbledore can't explain. Besides, my mother even told me I couldn't tell anyone about that and that most definitely includes Cedric.

"So does that mean you want to hear the rest of the story I was telling you before you left?"

"Yes. And even though I might get angry over some parts, remember that I love you unconditionally." He smirks at me.

I let out a small laugh before leading him away from the hallway that has a lot of students passing by to a more secluded part where we can continue this conversation.

I tell Cedric everything. Well, of course not everything. But I do tell him that building up a resistance against Veritaserum was an alternative to the Imperius curse. I tell him that I've managed to lie under it and that I plan to do so in front of Umbridge. Even though he once again points out that I'm insane, he doesn't actually get mad over it. Maybe Cedric is really on to something and I should trust him more. Couldn't hurt, right?